The Plinkett Awakens

March 9, 20163,244 Comments

literal potty humor.

Filed in: Plinkett Reviews

  • Wizard Phoenix

    AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! I CAN’T STOP CUMMING! AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGHHHH!!!!!!!

  • eeeh

    WOOOOHOOOO

  • HeySwanSong

    Oh my gaaaaaawwwddd

  • caye74

    New content! About time you frauds!

  • eeeh

    It’s coming out tomorrow.

  • OMG OMG OMG!!!

  • Michal Richter

    So all the Patreon money went to plastic surgery for Mike to make him look like Monstermash, I see…

  • Michal Richter

    Well, I dont know, how can you do a Plinkett review of a movie you liked?

  • dickface

    but didn’t plinkett do a review of the trailer? is this an alternate timeline? do i actually even fucking care?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Both Plinketts now have beards. This shit is going to become Crisis on Infinite Earths real soon.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Hack frauds.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Half in the Bag Plinkett is on a different Earth than the review Plinkett.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    But there was the Cinco de Star Wars video. That means we have 4 Plinketts (animated Plinkett). Possibly more. Plinketts of Infinite Earths?

  • Manioc

    Does this mean we’re finally getting a new Previously Recorded?!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Get on this, Perez and Wolfmann, before Geoff Johns gets to it!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Is this Star Wars ring theory a metaphor using a cock ring as an example?

  • Geahk Burchill

    Oh! OH! OOOOOOHHHH! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG
    I’m so excited! I’m so, SO excited! This is like Christmas! This is like Christmas times a thousand! This is like the 9/11 of Christmas!!!

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Just think about it. Earth-3’s (Or Earth-2, depending on what you prefer) Plinkett actually liked the Prequels.

  • Dan

    Holy shit, can’t wait. I had accepted classic Plinkett reviews weren’t coming back, now I’m about to relapse.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Me too! I thought Mike was done with the character! I can’t even express how excited I am!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I thought Earth 2 was Half in The Bag Plinkett.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    It can be done. You just got to point out the flaws, of this movie you liked. There’s many a movie I like that I’m aware has glaring problems. It’s much easier to do when you make a review with the help of a team of scientists and/or cheerleaders.

    Also, I think Mike likes Titanic, and that had a Plinkett review.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Holy fuck, I’m more hyped about this than any fucking movie this year! Fuck you, Space Cop! I’m not watching you ever, even though you’re sitting on my hard disk!

  • More urine pls.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s been done before, asshole. Titanic, Avatar, Star Trek: The Star Trek.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    It’s possible, anything is possible with Trump in the White House.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    True, if Batman’s mom and dad’s age difference is over 15 years I guess anything is.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Is this something from that new movie? *roll eyes*

  • dickface

    i wonder how many hookers they’ve collectively murdered in several different dimensions. gets me rock hard just thinking about it

  • tOmy`

    I can’t wait for the classic Plinkett review when Stoklasa says how much he loves this mov-

    Oh. Ooooooh.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I don’t mind it as long as those two actors are in a Flashpoint movie. A movie with out Johns’ involvement I might add.

  • Michal Richter

    Why so, angry, sir?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Oooooh.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I’m passive aggressive.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Personally I hope it gets the cat-raping it deserves. I fucking hated TFA and the ultimate catharsis is seeing Plinkett eviscerate it.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Oooo? What are you? Danny Elfman?

  • rizla

    we already know that mike liked the movie so what is the point exactly? it’s an easy task to tear it apart though. it’s just not a well written movie.
    so nothing would make me sadder than seeing plinkett give it a pass.
    please don’t do it.

  • tOmy`

    You mean by the very man who said he loved it and it did basically everything right?

    Not to subvert anyone’s expectations, of course, but something tells me reviewing TFA wasn’t the best choice here.

  • Ooooooh, nooooo.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    We know it’s at least more that one per Plinkett (except for that universe where he is not a killer), times infinite universes…

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Mike has already given it a pass.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Clearly you have never seen him review movies he likes.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    PreRec stream is tonight. So this is your lucky day!

  • *piss

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Maybe he actually has a split personality.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    ‘piss

  • Urine trouble my friend!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have seen you have upgraded your piss from Spotted Cow to Bud Light, which is actual piss.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You can also say that video was a piece of shit.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    No Gatorade was harmed during the making of this teaser.

  • Daggoth
  • WrongWithYourFace
  • rizla

    star wars is a different case.

    plinkett is the keeper of the art of star wars. he should have higher standards.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That was actual piss. They bought it from the store as it was advertised as Bud Light.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He is the keeper of the art of Star Trek too, asshole.

  • tOmy`

    Anyway, all my negativity aside, if this is real, then all aboard the hype train, I am sure that at least 20 episodes of Pre-Rec will tie us over till it hits this webzone in 2018.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s gonna be great.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That’s gonna be great.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Grapes.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    DVD/Blu-ray copy of TFA hits the bargain bin of Best Buy on april so Mike will only start editing then I presume.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Coruskant?

  • David Bland

    It’s about time you HACK FRAUDS!!!

    I have a feeling this is going to be like the Titanic review. Saying why the movie is both “The best movie, but also the worst.”

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Of course you can.

  • rizla

    no one cares about star trek

  • Geahk Burchill

    I think Mike underplayed it. I think he was planning on a Plinkett review and so he deflected the audience.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s so dense, every single image has so many things going on.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s like a poetry crime.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    and giving JJ’s trek a pass was a mistake

  • Who doesn’t like the underage Olsen Twins?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    We do, the studio don’t. Remember that newest trailer? OH MY GGGAAAWWWWDDDD!!!!

  • yellowface

    About time you showed up, Plinkett! Get hard has been out for a while now.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    *piss

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I’ll allow it.

  • Urine trouble my friend.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Is that a Die Hard movie?

  • So then I took my turn,

    Oh what a thing to have done,

    And it was all yellow.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You keep walking into these jokes.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Ironically Coldplay sounds as good as piss.

  • tOmy`

    Absolutely. I could basically hear you getting a hard-on when the words “idiotic millennials” were uttered.

  • Geahk Burchill

    It’s exactly what I expected. Abrams is a SAFE director. He’s not an auteur. He’s not going to make anything bad or great, just, good. Fine. Serviceable. Adequate.

    I guess I have to admit I find it very disappointing on one hand and exactly what I knew would happen on the other. Abrams just isn’t that talented. He’s good enough to make something people don’t hate but not good enough to make something special and where my disappointment comes in is that the worst kind of film for me is the forgettable one.

    Say what you will about the Prequels but you will never forget them. They are so terrible they are burned into most people’s memory despite their best efforts to drink the pain away. Empire Strikes Back is one of the greatest movies ever made. Even Jedi is memorable whether you like killer teddy bears or not!

    My expectation and sadness for this film is it will be like Star Trek 2009 in a few years. Everyone will agree they enjoyed it at the time but you won’t be able to get anyone to talk about specifics. Because no one actually remembers what happened in Star Trek 2009. It was fun and pretty and empty. It was low-calorie and good enough to not leave a bad after-taste but not good enough to add to any “best films list.” I wanted Star Wars to be a GREAT film but as soon as Abrams was picked to do it I knew I wouldn’t get that. Abrams was the SAFE choice and safe is forgettable.

  • yellowface

    Yes, it’s a prequel reboot to a Die Hard sequel.

  • Their sound brings warm feelings to my hear… face.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I don’t know who. Who isn’t attracted to underage cartoon teenage robots?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    So what you’re saying is that it’s gonna be great?

  • luvs2pwge

    This is the greatest thing that could ever happen to me :’)

    Also Trump 2016.

  • Yeah, world peace is for pacifist assholes.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Starring Daisy Ridley if we can get her working because she’s a hotter character than we’ve had in any of the other movies before.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I dunno. Who? Who doesn’t like to dress up in frilly pink dresses and have tea parties with their action figures?

    Oh. So just me then?

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Wen is next Plinkt review?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Cartman does.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Coming Eventually, Apparently.

  • luvs2pwge

    Tomorrow

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That’s right, Jay!

  • Liz Frazier

    Pretty much the only way they can go after all agreeing that it was a very good (but not great) Star Wars movie on HITB.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    This is already getting the responses I wanted.

  • It’s just gonna be a remake of the first Plinkett review.

  • luvs2pwge

    reboot dumba$$

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Good…good…

  • Liz Frazier

    In 3D!!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    To be honest most people who “hate” TFA are just idiotic millennials or/and fanboys.

  • luvs2pwge

    with digital effect blinking

  • Wizard Phoenix

    If you think TFA wasn’t Star Wars or the Prequels are better I think it’s time we start another witch hunt.

  • Teen Palpatine

    Look for him on the cumming of the fifth day.

  • luvs2pwge

    Hopefully @dollar store cashier wife gets a shout out in the review.
    dollar store cashier wife

  • Liz Frazier

    don’t forget the high frame rate

  • dollar store cashier wife

    err wtf? how can “fanboys” hate it? fanboys of what? who? where?

  • DynamixRo

    I’m gonna torrent the shit out of Space Cop if this doesn’t come out soon.

  • Red Skeleton

    Coming soon to a Tuesday near you….

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Fanboys of the OT? Or maybe fanoboys of the PT (those exist!)?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Fanboys of the Prequels.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Who gives a f*ck what we think about a trailer?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    what you’re gonna do? take away their 100$ revenue made from blu-rays?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “Hate” is much-too strong a word, but I’m neither of those things.

  • Since the new Plinkett review is coming up… does that mean Andrew died?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    those exist???

  • dollar store cashier wife

    But they liked A New Hope!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    He did say “over his dead body” more than once.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    I’m gonna keep an eye out for “New Plinkett Trailer Reaction”. You know it’s gonna happen.

  • luvs2pwge

    Atleast they can deduct the depreciation of all the unsold Space Cop dvds in their tax returns.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    For your ignorance for acknowledging this fan base I have prepared a 108 page rebuttal.

  • Geahk Burchill

    No way, TFA is about on par with the Prequels. TFA-haters are lovers of the original trilogy and didn’t want to see a weak-sauce remake.

  • yellowface

    They do, actually. You may have not noticed them but your br- oh, whatever.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    “Oh my god! It’s Harry talking!”

  • Nice quality. RLM still got it! Excellent! Even better lit than Space Cop. With spotlights and all. The next review is gonna be great.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I can imagine a Prequel fanboy writing a 108 page rebuttal as to why the Prequels are better than TFA and Mike Stoklasa is a stupid asshole retarded idiot head.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “stupid asshole retarded idiot poo-poo head”
    Fixed it for you.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “TFA is about on par with the Prequels” This is where I tell your opinion is wrong. You see I just saw Gods of Egypt, that is Prequel bad. We all just saw the Ghostbusters trailer and that looks Prequel bad.

  • George Lucas is a comidic genious… I mean hardcore drunk.

  • luvs2pwge

    George said to Charlie Rose he never actually wanted an Oscar, comedy gold.

  • Palpatine
  • Wizard Phoenix

    George Lucas basically admitted the Prequels sucked. Give up, ColoClawFish Commentaries.

  • luvs2pwge

    I hope you get a shit out in the new review

  • Palpatine

    I’ll be in the review!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Just like how I predict Rotten Tomatoes scores.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Don’t forget about me or Taco or Domo or everyone else.

  • luvs2pwge

    maybe only a pizza roll

  • Daggoth

    Don’t forget Plinkett – The Animated Series!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    The only thing I don’t like about this is that Star Wars has been thrust back into conversation here after an unprecedented 17-minute lull.

    Ah hell, back in the saddle again I suppose. Tighten that double barrel on my one remaining testacle, Mickey, and grab me a shot of Bulleit. It’s boogie time.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    err what? They hate disqus community. They even acknowledged it on some HiTB episodes.

  • Palpatine

    What?

  • Stop with the drinking and make sense…. you are frightening the millennials.

  • luvs2pwge

    a nice little poo

  • Palpatine

    Why?

  • How do you like your new monster face?

  • luvs2pwge

    You are the exception.

  • Palpatine

    It looks nice.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Nonsense, Millennials always walk in single file to hide their num-

    I f*cking hate all of you.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Don’t worry, someone will have a giant 108 page rebuttal to help you out.

  • luvs2pwge

    because the Olsen Twins

  • We are the RLM filth!

  • luvs2pwge

    Trump/Palpatine 2016
    Make The Galactic Empire Great Again

  • Tapeworm

    To be fair, disqus community all hate themselves as well.

  • Daggoth

    I recently found a batch of these Palpy… care to explain?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GV42DORXpM4

  • Palpatine

    Yes. This.

  • John DiLillo

    I mean, Plinkett has done “positive” reviews before. He was relatively kind to Star Trek ’09.

  • stryker1121

    Can die now, I can!

  • luvs2pwge
  • yellowface

    What the [expletive] are you doing? There are kids here, be more considerate.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Dear millennials,
    Stop watching Screen Junkies and watch more movies
    -The world

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    SO DAREDEVIL’S NEW COSTUME RITE WHAT DO WE THINK?

  • FuriousGeorge

    *speaks in tongues*

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “It looks stewpit”
    -Nick Mundy, professional idiot.

  • Tapeworm

    I laughed more than I am comfortable with

  • Imperial_orb

    Mhmhmhm, What a fool you are… Mike has no choice.
    He and Star Wars are bound for all eternity. It was the Plinkett Reviews of the SW prequels who breathed life into RLM.
    You see… it’s his destiny.

  • luvs2pwge

    LOL, when papa palpatine orgasmed ><

  • Wizard Phoenix

    How that we have a TFA review coming is the Matrix sequels next? Tear those brothers-I mean siblings-I mean sisters a new asshole.

  • Sailori7

    Their new show is shit, i know they put effort into it, but it’s really not funny.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Fuck it I’m never going to sleep again! I’m just going to sit here pressing f5 till it happens.

  • Geahk Burchill

    No. TFA is about as good as ROTS if I’m being generous.

    All they had to do was try. They had unlimited budget and access to all the most talented people in the world. They could have hired anyone they wanted. They had one of the most engaged and dedicated fan-bases, built in. They had a universe that makes great storytelling easy. They had literally everything on their side.

    There was no fucking excuse for the film they ended up making. If I wanted something that unoriginal I would have bored myself to tears reading someone’s gawd damn fan-fic.

    What got me most was regressing Solo back so that he was a pathetic old man trying to relive his glory days. Also, they pretend to have a strong female character but threw Leia (the actual strong female character) under the bus, making her into a doddering old woman who never accomplished anything aside from producing a whiny shit who turned to the dark side.

    I really expected Leia to essentially be Mon Mothma. I assumed we would start the film with a young new Republic having been built up over the last 30 years with Leia as sort of a George Washington figure.

    

I expected GENERAL Solo to be managing a fragile peace between the New Republic and the remnants of a shattered Empire, struggling to maintain a border region which resembles a powder keg.

    I expected Luke, the new head of a fledgling Jedi Order working to recapture the best of what the order had been while learning the lessons of the past.

    You know, interesting characters dealing with difficult challenges as the fragile utopia they have attempted to build is put in danger once again by the machinations of a jealous and vengeful empire. I expected to care about these characters and be invested in the world they lived in.

    Instead I got an exhausting, boring, rehash of all the ideas I had seen before but done worse. They blew up a FOURTH Death Star because J.J. And Disney can’t think up any new ideas.

  • Ren1

    LOL, this shit had me rolling!

  • Palpatine

    Hey! That’s private!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s like Nick Mundy was involved in it.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Andrew-What a stupid idea! Who uploads a Plinkett trailer at 3 in the morning?
    Everyone else-Oh boy! 3 AM!

  • Klint

    It’s gonna be great.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    “So this is basically going to be the Star Trek ’09 review, right?”

    – Some Guy.

  • Klint

    It’s gonna be great.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You sound like a fanboy who watches Screen Junkies and not Charlie Kaufman.

  • Palpatine

    No, like the Prequel reviews! JK LOL!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Not if that annoying asshole comparing it the Prequels here as anything to say about it.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I think you’re projecting. You can go enjoy Norm of the North. I’ll take Anomalisa.

  • Geahk Burchill

    You are the one fanboying.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    It was so nostalgic hearing ‘I squeeze Gats’ at the end.
    Mike is a worse hack fraud than Disney.

  • Imperial_orb

    Oh my God, this is incredible. Tell Mike, to not skimp on the freaking George Lucas behind-the-scenes footage.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    The new Ghostbusters is as good a candidate for a Plinkett review as any.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    You mean of him sulking at the ranch and whipping people?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Hyperbole is something you do not understand.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    True, it’s the new this decade’s Phantom Menace, in terms of insulting a franchise.

  • Geahk Burchill

    TFA is as bad as anything Lucas ever did. The fact is, there are seven Star Wars films and only two great ones.

  • You’re alive! Thank Yeezy, I thought you were dead.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No of him walking into random documentaries.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    why? did you ‘Accidentally.’ hire more hit men to kill me?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You have the most wrong opinions ever.

  • Geahk Burchill

    This is an RLM comment section. Everything is Hyperbole. You have to hyperbole your hyperbole.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Have you seen the new “international” trailer? It has a stage dive joke no one’s ever seen before!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Alright Xzibit take it easy.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No, you have to be a passive aggresive pervert

  • Wizard Phoenix

    *XxXSWfan92

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Drop the mic Wizza, you ernt it.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I am refusing to watch the movie so I have not seen it. There’s no good signs.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    I expect clips from the interview with Charlie Rose to be included.

  • Admiral Bone-to-Pick

    Awesome. Who’s playing Palpatine here – is that Mike under the makeup?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “I sold Plinkett to white slavers”
    -Mike Stoklasa

  • Geahk Burchill

    Yeah.

  • Well… my clips is spent.

  • tOmy`

    You know, there is one more thing I would like to point out:

    Disney is gonna take it down within mere hours. And that’s just being really optimistic about it.

  • No… yes, but that’s not the point. I thought you sacrificed yourself for the release of the upcoming Plinkett review.

  • John Bigbootay

    Glad to see you’ve(maybe) come to your senses Mike. It really was a bad movie.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Someone forgot to shut the fucking door and it made him angry.
    And if there are kids here, YOUR PARENTS ARE BAD PARENTS. tell them to take your Ipad away.

  • Palpatine

    No, that’s me. I put on a lot of weight.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    THE CHUD HAS RETURNED!!!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    He’s going to point out a few things he didn’t like while saying that he enjoyed the film overall and throwing a few jabs and crosses at George Lucas.

    Only this time it will be funny and he won’t be half asleep.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Is this satire? #TumblrJokes

  • John Bigbootay

    You’re probably right. I was just hoping the euphoria had worn off.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have a strong feeling we’re getting two Plinkett reviews this year mostly due to Paul Fieg and Sony Pictures ruining our childhoods.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I give ROTS and ROTJ a passing grade. Everything else is shit-sauce on garbage-crackers

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Yes. This.
    Caravan of Courage: An Ewok Adventure and the Star Wars Christmas Special.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Are discounting the Ewoks TV show? That shit beats BTAS any day for me.

  • tOmy`

    Nah, the euphoria won’t wear off, because it ain’t euphoria.

    Some people came to terms with it, some people found it boring, but everyone was kinda relieved it didn’t suck as bad as the prequels.

    Euphoria is too strong of an emotion to describe anything connected to the final result that was The New Hope.

    I mean TFA.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    If Ghostbusters is the disaster we all think it will be, I’d rather have a Man of Steel-style evisceration on HitB.

  • Imperial_orb

    I wish you would be sitting on my hard disk.

  • Hey, that’s the wrong Raid. You need the kind in the Fast Kill Low Irritant kind, the one that comes in the blue bottle. UNSUBSCRIBE.
    http://i.imgur.com/OYopon8.png

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Man of Steel at least you can see why people really like it but with Ghostbusters: Fuck You Edition I can’t see any one liking it.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Star Wars films Ranked:

    The Empire Strikes Back *****
    A New Hope ****
    The Return of the Jedi ***
    The Revenge of the Sith **
    The Force Awakens **
    The Phantom Menace *
    Attack of the Clones *

  • Tapeworm

    Me caring:

    456)A little

  • Palpatine

    As you all can plainly see, I’m fat in this video.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Yeah. Almost the worst. Not quite but close. I think Jar Jar Abrams was trying pretty hard to be the worst but he even failed at that.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    So this is ranked worst to best starting from the top, right?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Thank you for telling us, Mister Christ. Can you turn my water into wine now?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Yep, The Emperor has let himself go a little.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s a big problem.

  • Geahk Burchill

    It’s not as bad as Attack of the Clones or The Phantom Menace but it’s pretty bad. It’s probably the third worst.

  • Imperial_orb

    It’s gonna be great.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Cocks.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    You might want to consider gastric bypass at your namesake Surgical Reconstruction Center.

  • Palpatine

    For me, RotS and TFA are switched and TFA has three stars. But I agree with the rest of the list.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    This was great. Do Land Before Time next!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Review the new Ghostbusters movie.

  • The Phantom Menace is the best. The rest I’ve never heard of.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    In all seriousness, I put Empire first and then the rest is just kind of a blob.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Rots has grown on me over time. It’s still pretty bad but there are enough things I like that I can’t entirely hate it. As far as stars, I reserve three stars for films I would actually ENJOY watching again rather than films I am stockholmed to appreciate.

  • tOmy`

    Call me silly, but I do enjoy some Naboo romance.

  • rizla

    he genuinely liked it, and it’s easy to see what he’s going to say as plinkett: it’s youthful fun so it’s supposed to be dumb, JJ abrams knows how to make exciting actions scenes, people are running around, etc, etc.
    all this might be true but the problem is that the script is garbage. the whole movie is a cheap shot. it’s a cynical studio product – just a kinda well made one unlike the prequels.
    based on the prequel and indiana jones reviews plinkett should emphasize this. i’m just afraid he won’t.

  • Joe Syxpac

    This is bullshit!

    We still haven’t gotten The Last Airbender or Black Monster Dicks #2.

  • tOmy`

    In other shocking news: Movie that was actually divisive (you know, if you talked to people) stayed divisive for the next couple of months.

  • Palpatine

    Ian McDiarmid and Ewan McDonald make that movie for me.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    But does it feature the power of Patty compels you?

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Your comrade left you so he could say “Dellow Felegates.”

    I’d forget it happened, too.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Exactly! Ewan McDonald is so good! He has the higher ground.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I remember my sister showed her son Episode 1 to get him into Star Wars and he fell asleep. Little kids think the Prequels are bad. Take that millennials.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    If you make a graph with this data, it’ll look like a peak, if we order them chronologically. If we order them by release date, it almost looks like a slide.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    My nephews fell asleep during Man of Steel. I was so proud.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    The peaceful is willing to you the past is my brothers. What I love is you.

  • You hurt me, deeply. His list checks out tou.

  • Palpatine

    That’s every blockbuster in a nutshell.

  • john

    Goddamit Rey is not a Mary Sue, go look up a what mary sue is, Max Landis

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Divisive my ass. It’s 3 assholes arguing with 3 other assholes while the rest of the world loved it.

  • Bubs

    Wait, there’s a new Star Wars movie? I hadn’t heard.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Star War Backstroke of The West had better dialogue.

  • Has anyone in here read the Star Wars Ring Theory? Anything to it?

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    no and no.

  • tOmy`

    No, the rest of the world went and seen the movie. That’s why it was a smash box office hit.

    Unfortunately, that doesn’t say shit about its quality, as people have to go and see it before they can call it good / bad.

  • Palpatine

    Yeah, it’s BS.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It involves the half eaten doughnut ships with a doughnut hole in the middle.

  • Kylo Blart Sith Blart II

  • Imperial_orb

    Man, they really need to get that one sick fuck for the review again. That perverso who wanked off the droid.

  • john

    Goddamit… Rey is not a Mary Sue, go look up a what mary sue is, Max Landis

  • scoundr3l

    Except the movie fucking suuuuuuuuuuuuuuucked

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Batman and Superman are involved? How does that work?

  • tOmy`

    Yea, I gave it a read. It’s interesting.

    That’s the only positive thing I can say about it.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No it didn’t. You’re wrong, asshole. You see?

  • Oh. Where can I find it… oh yea Google. Sorry I aint a millenial. In my time tablets were made of bark and smartphones were called “a life”

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I just can’t put TFA below Revenge of the Sith. Even though it was better than Menace or Clones, ’till this day it makes me more furious than either of those do.

  • john

    You have the right to your own opinion, but i want to let you know your opinion is terrible

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    GO BACK TO TUMBLR PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Your opinion on his opinion is terrible because you find his opinion to terrible.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I don’t think Rey is a Mary Sue and some of us think that and some of us don’t. Now fuck off, John.

  • john

    My dick is so hard, whats your opinion on that?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I’m not Omitted. I can’t answer that.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Same here. Despite visually being an improvement it seems every character became dumber.

  • john

    This is the second time you’re agreeing/yelling at me

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I just want you to stop talking about it because we talked about it for 30 seconds and it was annoying.

  • Geahk Burchill

    BanditIncorporated showed that Rey is more Mary Sue than the ORIGINAL Mary Sue.

  • john

    Touch my penis

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Go back to tumblr please. Just stop this.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I think it will take time to adjust to TFA. Seeing it twice. I was disappointed the first time and angry the second time. It actually got worse. I don’t know what will happen the third time I watch it. I’ll probably have a stroke.

  • So I’m reading the Ring Theory now. He does not get the critizism at all it seems.

  • scoundr3l

    My favorite part was the lack of conflict and the red armed C3P0, because new merchandise

  • john

    Is this like a popular tumblr thing?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I refuse to read it based on the headline. What the fuck is it?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I hear Rogue One is so bad they’re not even screening it for audiences.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Max Landis isn’t here. He’s off making American Ultra 2.

  • Palpatine

    I love his Prequel fan remake videos.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    It is no longer a conversation. It’s a lecture. And I f*cking hate lectures.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You mean his shitty indie drama.

  • john

    I heard you got dicked so badly, pornos won’t screen it for your parents

  • Geahk Burchill

    What I mostly hated was how the original trilogy characters are treated. Han goes back to being a bum and Leia is a doddering old biddy who only ever produced a sniveling shit-hole son. Abrams clearly didn’t think much of the original trilogy accomplishments.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    And it’s a stupid one too.

  • Geahk Burchill

    They are pretty good! I think they make better novels than movies. Bandit is not so good at the pacing and dialog but he’s got great ideas!

  • Joe Syxpac

    Whatever passes for a movie in that half shaven head of his.

  • A defense for the story telling and cinematography in the Prequels.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I actually liked it more the second time. But I’ve yet to see it a third. I’m also not that emotionally attached to Star Wars, so a lot of the alleged “flaws” mean basically nothing to me.

  • tOmy`

    ’twasn’t that bad, frankly.

    The promoting could have hurt the movie, I agree with him on that, but it was far from being the only problem of the movie.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    It had Neema directing. Oh, Neema, you did such a good job.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    A new Plinkett review?! Isn’t it a little too early for the late-00s nostalgia?

  • Geahk Burchill

    This I will wholeheartedly agree with. ROTS is a film full of morons. Nobody knows their job and can’t remember what they did last time.

  • It gets into discussing Stoklasas view of “I knew something was wrong from the beginning” seeing TPM.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Are you mocking Douglas Walker?

  • Joe Syxpac
  • They’re awesome. Allegedly.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Probably not, I needed to google him to know who he was.

  • Imperial_orb

    Mmmmm… No. I meant the holy footage where he admits to have thrown too much out there.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    This guy write the 108 rebuttal?

  • RLMkeepitup

    Is Disney going to let footage hit the internet? Anyway, I would say a plinkett movie could work but then there’s already crazy fat ethel… and yeah, someone tried to remake that too http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2186723/

  • They could just reenact the scenes from the movie with plastic toys.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    They are dumberer than in any of the previous films. So what happened in Star Wars was the result of complete idiots doing dumb things because it had to happen. Terrible movie.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I’m wearing ten right now. One on each finger.

    It’s not doing anything at all for me.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Helga the giant woman would know that.

  • Wrong tip!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Like Alan Moore?

  • RLMkeepitup

    on that note the han solo in mouse trap at 21 sec in was ominous. perhaps you’re right…

  • I think the new Plinkett review should premiere exclusively during a PreRec stream. #buisnesslikeapro

  • Joe Syxpac

    Stop name dropping you neck bearded hipster!

  • RLMkeepitup

    Rich has teased so many times no one would believe them

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Oh no please don’t empower the Twitch chat and make them think they’re important.

  • Palpatine

    But the review will be muted and you’ll hear is Rich and Jack laughing.

  • Geahk Burchill

    He’s infinitely mockable. He even mocks himself.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Did you thought holocaust was “the hypest thing ever” too?

  • tOmy`

    And nobody will ever know, because people mute Pre-Rec by default.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    We agree on something. It is time for the dance of joy!

  • They’ll just complain about the bad controls.

  • Imperial_orb

    Look man, I don’t want to be a Killjoy or anything, but I really feel like,
    they may have gone too far in a few places…

  • (BEEEEEP)

  • Geahk Burchill

    I’m sure we agree on a lot. You just don’t like my opinion on TFA. That’s fine. I don’t care much. I like The Ang Lee’s Hulk so, everyone has their bad movies they like. You can have TFA.

  • Domo

    Well, young Italian Palpatine, you now have new memorable quotes to add to your arsenal.

    Disney may have given up on you, but Plinkett never will.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I’m pretty sure we all reacted like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfPg5LjGYz8

  • TheManHole

    This is the best news ever!!!

  • Palpatine

    I sure do!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Kanye West just died from a heart attack would be.

  • Yeah, who needs world peace! FUCK HIPPIES!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Ang Lee’s Hulk is the Garden State of superhero movies.

  • Palpatine

    Uh, Final Solution.

    #GetYourFactsStraight

  • TheManHole

    In before we get a review of Beverly hills chihuahua… the squeal.

  • Joe Syxpac

    There were 65 solutions prior to that.

    You would know, wouldn’t you?

  • RLMkeepitup

    what is the star wars ring theory?

  • maximilian645

    force awakens sucked so hard.

  • Ren1
  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s basically the it’s poetry so that it rhymes quote.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It ain’t no Boyhood

  • Imperial_orb

    Oh man, Screen Junkies… didn’t watched there stuff in ages. I started watching their content when the Boys did that collaboration, remember? Honest Trailer were pretty funny back then, had a better voice guy as well.

  • Toffoli_73

    I’d honestly put TFA ahead of ROTJ. The Luke and Vader stuff is great but not enough to save that movie.

  • I enjoyed reading the Ring Theory. Many good points. Nothing new for me to digest really. Read like an ideological propaganda piece similar to the Plinkett Rev… WHAT?

    I’ve listened/read to George talk about The Prequels and The Trilogy and I know what he wants to create. I dont think he is a master or a brilliant man, nor a good filmmaker. I think he surrounded himself with talent and I think he should continue to do so if he wishes. He has Lucas money plus Disney money and he’s not dead yet! Gather talent and make movies.

    Stanley Kubrick is a genious filmmaker. He is everything Lucas (I guess) wants to be. He could execute his movies with a ton of work, knowlage and time. These movies work and are masterpieces.

    To sum up The Ring Theory. Saying that Mr. Lucas created “an epic mythological saga—full of exotic locales and monsters, like the sagas of old” does not give merit to a secret artistic talent. Only proves he had great ideas and a few good money shots. LorR movies are masterful and work just like a saga on a silver screen. George had grand ideas and a grand plot but poor ideas how to make them work. And comical naivety in many affects of what a movie is and works.

    One more thing. The Bible is a master piece of story telling with similar traits. There is a reason why it works so well. There is a reason why the sextet does not.

    Don’t don’t Mr. Lucas please. Don’t make more Star Wars.

  • Palpy, you’ve let yourself go…

  • Toffoli_73

    ROTS is still just a blur to me. I at least remember how terrible TPM and AOTC were, whereas ROTS was bad in a much more boring way. Then again, I haven’t watched any of the prequels in years so it’s all becoming blurry. I think I like it that way.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I don’t mind Ang Lee’s Hulk either.

  • It’s when you put an anal ring inside your butt and then proceed to insert R5D4 toys in it while chanting “it’s like poetry, it rhymes!”

  • Joe Syxpac

    Too mundane.

    Kanye West would have to die by getting ripped apart Michael Vick’s dogs while listening to his own music in a gold plated Lamborghini going 200 on the Autobahn.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    it ain’t no Robocop remake.

  • maximilian645

    It ain’t no Star Wars sequel.

  • RLMkeepitup

    Jay Jay basically took what he thought were the best parts of the previous films.. i’m looking forward to this review..

  • Joe Syxpac

    It will be around forever. It will never go away.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    If gamma rays give you cancer, it’d be Gard–… agh, I’m sure there’s a joke somewhere in there, but I can’t quite figure it out.

  • I’m sure it’ll be entertaining, though he’ll probably gush over it as Mike really liked it. I would have liked it more if he announced a “Man of Stool” review.

  • TheManHole

    Comparing Tolkien and Lucas is not really fair. Tolkien was a genius who arguably created the most consistent fantasy world ever. I mean people even call elves, dwarfs, and trolls Tolkienesque fantasy. I think one of Luca’s biggest failures was not understanding that more you know about something and how it works the more boring it is. This is why personally I was so pissed off he tried to explain what the force was.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Wait til some crackpot philosopher gives us a hegelian interpretation of Star Wars, that would be fun…

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    The Rank Star Wars Movies I’ve Seen, um, Ranked…

    Star Wars: Episode # – A New Hope ★ ★ ★ ★ ☆
    Star Wars: Episode # – The Empire Strikes Back ★ ★ ★ ☆ ☆
    Star Wars: Episode # – The Return of the Jedi ★ ★ ☆ ☆ ☆
    Star Wars: Episode # – The Force Awakens ★ ★ ☆ ☆ ☆
    Star Wars: Episode # – The Phantom Menace ★ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
    Star Wars: Episode # – Attack of the Clones ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

  • BUT STAR WARS IS A STAR WARS AND MAN OF STEEL IS NOT A STAR WARS,
    DO YOU EVEN FANBASE BRO??????????

  • TheManHole

    Or Ghostbusters. 😉

  • tl;dr

  • Well I compare them because of the quote about sagas. And you are right I think.

  • Ren1

    Some of the comments on the ring theory website are comedy gold:

    “I will continue to enjoy the stories for many years to come, especially now that our 2nd son, Anakin (yes that’s right, we named him Anakin), is now just getting old enough to start experiencing the Star Wars magic.”

  • Listen pal! This is war. Star Wars nerd war. You are either with us or against us. Now watch this drive.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    I’d replace Bible with Iliad. Unless you mean the old testament.

  • frankelee

    I just don’t understand how they can manage this turn around of 2 to 4 minutes of content a week. Do they have interns?

  • Uhm… gunshot, fade to black?

  • Jack will work for anything these days.

  • I planned 9/11 in my backyard. I’m not letting Bush take this away from me, okay?

  • Ren1

    “Jar Jar Binks is not a black/Jamaican stereotype. He’s an archetypal trickster/scapegoat/hero.

    As a half-black person, I find these racist accusations offensive. You don’t like the films, fine. But don’t bring political correctness into this.”

  • Toffoli_73

    Meh. I liked it. Was it an amazing, transcendent Star Wars experience? Not even close. Was it mostly entertaining and mostly competently executed? Sure. I suppose it matters how much you care that is was as much a remake/reboot as a sequel. I have a ton of issues with it critically, but the fact that, after a few viewings, it’s something I can watch without cringing, is good enough for me. I’m ok with Star Wars being good enough now. If future films turn out to be great, even better. I just can’t honestly say I thought it sucked. I thought it was ok.

  • The Bible is an amazing achievement. Iliad fades in comparison.

  • TheManHole

    I mean in a way it makes sense to compare them. One can not think about Fantasy without thinking of LotR just like one can’t think of sci-fi without thinking of Star Wars. Just Tolkien had a far greater understanding of how to craft a universe just like how Lucas has a better understanding on how to sell toys.

  • Boyhood ain’t no Phantom Menace?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    True, but Man of Steel is very much AIDS, and has a lot of 9-11 imagery.

  • Toffoli_73

    It’s as if Tolkien had only thought of The Hobbit, and others came in and fleshed that world out in the LotR sequels. Like Empire did with the first Star Wars.

  • Well. I agree and see your point. But all storytelling has rules and ways to make it work. Its different genres.

  • Too many brown people.

  • RLMkeepitup

    wonder which half is black, the top or the bottom!

  • TheManHole

    Pretty much this.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    To troll everyone they should do just that, but talk over it and answer questions from the chat.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Ba-dm-tsh!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    STOP BEING RATIONAL.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    And that’s two of the big three.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Except, Star Wars is more Fantasy than it is Sci-fi.

    Ahd that’th the truth, Ruth.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    That’s right, Mitch!

  • Ren1

    “Anakin is probably one of the most complex and ambiguous fictional character I have come across in movies, television and novels.”

    Im done, I cant.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Yet, you can read the Iliad as an unitary tale, story or whatever, the Bible is just a bunch of stuff put together, it feels like that.

  • Toffoli_73

    I think Mi- sorry Plinkett, hit the nail on the head when he talks about Lucas’ biggest contribution is his stubbornness to get his films made his way. And the vision he had that films like Star Wars could have success in the main stream. He certainly is an inspiration for anyone determined to get their work made and their vision seen by others. However, you probably wouldn’t want to study many of his “techniques” when it comes to writing and directing.

  • Imperial_orb

    Nah! Come on man, that was pretty funny. The guy who did it clearly put some effort in.

  • Fair enough I get your point.

  • So, the characters in Star Wars are basically the pawns of history in its movement towards freedom?

  • TheManHole

    True but to most it’s seen as just Sci-fi. Only real movie nerds know it’s Sci-Fantasy.

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    “mostly entertaining and mostly competently executed”

    They should put this on J. J. Abrams’ tombstone. It neatly summarizes his cinematic output to date. Will Abrams ever rise above competent mediocrity, I wonder…

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “after a few viewings”

    After a FEW viewings!??! I’ll give you twice. Because, I get it, enthusiasm. Any more than two times, one needs to get a job, a life, a new hobby, a book to read, a friend that will have sex with one, a ticket to another movie, or any combination thereof.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    It seems so, Luke Skywalker is space Che Guevara.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Magic Eight-Ball says, “Most Likely Not.”

  • TheManHole

    I learned a lot about shot reverse shot, A camera B camera.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    And gas station coffee.

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    Sadly, I agree…

  • “KILL ME”
    Patton Oswalt

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I don’t know why you’d be sad about it. J.J. Abrams is living proof that the modestly competent can become millionaires too, if they happen to be standing in the right place at the right time and can trace the better, more creative work of others.

    That’s almost as ‘Merican as apple pie and lingerie football.

  • TheseMenAreFrauds

    So I just watched the new Plinkett trailer. PALPATINE! LUCAS! These are things I know.

  • Toffoli_73

    Also that a scene in a 50’s diner is so Star Wars.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I predict that the Garden State of superhero films will be coming out on March 25th.

  • Was some of it good?

  • Imperial_orb

    You look like you died of obesity in the video…
    horrible, morbid obesity.

  • Toffoli_73

    I mean, that’s what I’ve thought of pretty much all the Marvel movies.

  • TheseMenAreFrauds
  • TheseMenAreFrauds

    Whatever your thoughts are, that’s my opinion, too!

  • Toffoli_73

    Would you say the same thing about any of the other directors who’ve helmed a Star Wars movie? I mean, who here ever talks about an Irvin Kershner movie that isn’t Empire?

  • Toffoli_73

    Some people think it looks good. Some people think it looks eeeeeehhhhhh not so good.

  • Nordel

    Poor idiot named his kid Anikin. Now he’s stuck being an apologist for the prequels forever, no matter how terrible they are. You can’t ever be objective because you named your stupid kid Anikin.

  • TheseMenAreFrauds

    Don’t don’t about movies you don’t like. UNWATCH THEM.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    X-Men Apocalypse?

  • Ren1

    Precisely.

  • Toffoli_73

    I will say that I’m genuinely interested in Rian Johnson’s take. He’s a far more interesting filmmaker than Abrams.

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    I enjoyed Star Trek 2009 enough to wish that it had been more than mere spectacle. Unfortunately, Abrams films, while competently made, are ultimately empty and vacuous. It impacts my enjoyment of what could have potentially been a memorable movie-going experience but ended up being forgettable schlock. That’s what I mean by sad. And I couldn’t care less if Abrams is a millionaire or not.

  • Ren1

    Plinkett is attempting to create a vast epic series of reviews in the ring-style of the olde tyme myths and legends.

  • Michael Collins

    I Jizzed in my pants!

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    Me too.

  • Imperial_orb

    Nass, there is something we must do as soon as possible.

  • Dare I even ask?

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius
  • Ren1

    The stories’ ultimate bad guy has a catchphrase which is: ‘gooood.’
    It’s so complex and meaningful!

  • Palpatine

    I know, I know.

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    He can’t possibly do worse than Lucas. I mean, y’know, fingers crossed… At this point, as long as it’s not a miserable disappointment, I’ll be happy.

  • Tubbing up nicely. Join the club of fat galactic freaks!

  • I adored The Force Awakens, but this is gonna be fun!

  • Domo

    Embrace your size! Don’t let those fuckers get you down.

    Use Sith block! Sith block those painful comments away!

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Almost as complex as ‘noooooooo!’

  • Imperial_orb

    Fuck.

  • None of them compare to the Tao of Pooh.

  • *button prompt* press X now Y X Y A B X Y A now down

    – YOU DIED –

  • Right, right!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Best thumbnail ever.

  • Palpatine

    That’ll be next one. I hope.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Sheeeeit, at this point I’m even considering reading books.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s a big problem.

  • Imperial_orb

    That’s a good one.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Ghostbusters: The Fuck You Edition is prime Plinkett fodder. More than Man of Steel.

  • Do we really need A New Plinkett Review? We got a ton of people on YT reviewing things. To much quality already!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I hope this is the next next Plinkett review
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3ugHP-yZXw

  • john

    post a link, i want to share your misery

  • Gift Card

    What does this mean?!?

  • Do we still care? I made my 5-6 jokes about it last week.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Yes, we do. All new content is restitution for the Steam Controller episode of Pre Rec.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Ruining Ghostbusters is like ruining Star Wars. Imagine if someone did that. Ohhhh…..

  • It means they managed to sober up Mr. Stoklasa to make another Plinkett Review.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    He’s reviewing Joe vs. The Volcano.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Something

  • Ren1

    Oh my…
    This looks…
    Like ass.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    It’s been a while since this movie came out. Mike’s probably watched it and, you know, thought more about it.
    I’m surprised that people are thinking that “Mr. Plinkett’s” opinions will be the exact same as Mike’s after he watched it once and then discussed it at four in the morning.

  • Fred Frink

    Yes! Review Cop is coming soon. Cant fucking wait.

  • Gift Card

    Then dreams do come true…

  • Palpatine

    I have no idea.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “Where is my flask go?”

  • Sheriff Mitchell
  • john

    Thank you, someone who finally understands Kanye

    “Because I’m dope, and I do dope shit”

  • Release this soon and I will forgive you for not doing a Crimson Peak review whilst on Mt. Everest.

  • Imperial_orb

    ♬Dreams can come true

    Look at me babe I’m with you

    You know you gotta have hope

    You know you gotta be strong♬

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    They won’t be the same. He’ll discuss things he didn’t like. But he’ll still be positive overall.

    It would be pretty stupid to put out a review destroying the film months after he put out a review saying he loved it.

    I’m more surprised that people are thinking that he’s suddenly started to hate it for no reason.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Seriously, this is the first time I watch the trailer. And I thought the black lady wasn’t …a lady, cause of her voice. Then I thought: “internet controversy”.
    Am I a nazi?

  • Which is the car key? Rich? Is this the key?

  • Imperial_orb

    Did ya get it?

  • john

    I feel like people are forgetting how bad those prequels were. Sure Abrams didnt make the deepest movie, but its Star Wars, its not really that deep of a movie. He got the emotions of the original and thats what really matters

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Cock teasing.

  • Imperial_orb

    Nass, did you got it?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Can you fuck off?! Fuck off, I got it!

  • Gift Card

    I don’t mind being teased, as long as there’s a payoff.

  • Sir yes sir.

  • TheManHole

    Look it’s already out on blu-ray!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Nah, that movie was ass

  • Classic Drunk Stoklasa.

  • Spoiled Ants

    Please no more Star Wars reviews. I beg you, There’s enough StarWars out there to fill three alternate dimensions.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Palpy has gotten puffy.

  • Ogrot

    It depends. Is that elf yours?

  • Fred Frink

    Melodramatic period ghost incest murder caper. Ripped-off the Stuff when they ate the red clay oozing out of the ground and went bezerk.

  • Ogrot

    Ah hell no?

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Yeah, right?
    I picture that the review will be more in-depth and nuanced than the one he gave in ‘Half in the Bag.’ The people with either extreme love or hatred of this movie are probably going to be disappointed. He probably won’t tear the movies a new asshole and he probably won’t gush over it, either.
    But this is an internet and everything exists in an unfortunate love/hate binary.
    Shit, I don’t care if he likes the movie or not. If they can make a compelling video, I’m just happy that Mr. Plinkett woke up from his coma.

  • john

    My biggest problem with all these Ring Theory bullshit, besides that I think its just overthinking is that everyone has made out that George Lucas is like this true auteur of the first three films. If you read the behind the scenes of these movies, he had a lot of help and a lot of coincidences.

    A New Hope was just trying to be Flash Gordon until he couldnt get the rights. So he changed shit and kept compromising

    Empire he had Lawrence Kasden who wrote it, and more shit that I dont feel like typing. Man I really should have had more coherent argument when I started writing this.

    Returnof the Jedi: Kasden wanted Han to die. He had multiple writers. George changed half the shit to sell more toys.

    tl:dr I lost interest halfway. TFA is good for what it is. My dick is hard

  • Alright! Not to get a RLM merch Giant Booze Flask… oh… no flask?…. Space Cop Blu Ray……. Where is my gun?

  • Ogrot

    Gas station coffee can really save you money on craft services expenses.

  • john

    I wont have this, I want more i tell you, MOREEE. Plus i really just want to hear from particularly these guys about that movie

  • ItsFreakinSteve

    HOLY SHIT YES!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    “Filmmaking should be a collaborative experience”

    – Some guy.

  • john

    “Sex should be a collaborative experience”

    -Me convincing my girlfriend

  • Palpatine

    George is not an autuer.

  • Captain Turbo

    Taking a poop should be a collaborative experience…

  • RLMkeepitup

    a poofy inflammed monster face

  • NameWithheldByRequest

    It’s unbelievable, I know. I started hearing how the prequels weren’t as bad as the critics were saying, so I went back and rewatched them, and they were worse than I remembered. I have no idea what these revisionists are talking about. And now with the ring theory so popular, people are trying to rehabilitate the prequels by ignoring just how awful they were as films and focusing on some supposed “deeper meaning” or whatever. Say what they like, but the prequels are still unwatchable garbage. Although, I will admit, I certainly enjoyed reading about the ring theory. Great fun. Too bad it’s about the god-awful prequels…

    I enjoyed The Force Awakens well enough. It wasn’t deep, true. But I haven’t seen an Abrams film yet that wasn’t superficial action schlock. Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Speaking of piss they’re remaking Death Wish.

  • john

    I agree?

  • Who plays Charles Bronson?

  • Spoiled Ants

    The talked about it extensively on Half in the Bag. I’d rather have them tackle a great movie or a really bad one. StarWars was too middle-of-the-road.

  • john

    Vagina puffy?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Bruce Willis.

  • Palpatine

    My forehead looks more like an ass-crack.

  • Raiden1018

    FUCK. YES!!!! WHENNN!!??!!?

  • Captain Turbo

    Jamaican? I thought Jar Jar was a lazy Mexican! D’oh!

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Fucking Bruce Willis.
    My guess is that it’s because Bruce Willis is old and has no desire to live so he fits the profile.

  • john

    RIGHT NOW!!

  • *sigh* Plinkett………. another funeral……… where is my Buckaroo Banzai Reboot?

  • I guess he was tired of playing John McLane.

  • RLMkeepitup

    i thought the prequels were mid of the road before Mike made Rich rewatch them and take notes.

  • john

    I like how they just accepted there are two plinkett. The Rich one and the one we like.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    They should just call it Mr. Magoo instead.

  • Palpatine

    The review is coming out in May. I’m calling it right now.

  • When Rougue One comes out.

  • john

    but but but Star WARS

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    “Sex should be a collaborative experience?????????”

    –Mr. Plinkett on consent.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Jesus Christ.
    That movie gave ME a death wish.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You were shot out of a window with a rocket launcher?

  • RLMkeepitup

    didn’t it take about 6 months between the plinkett rises and titanic review?

  • john

    basically you’re right. They make entertaining shit.

  • “A mild-mannered father is transformed into a killing machine after his family is torn apart by a violent act.”

    Ok…. sounds about right. But still nothing can top this classic moment…. let’s watch.

    https://youtu.be/fgbPUHfBJA0?t=32m10s

  • *McLame

    AHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

  • RLMkeepitup

    he was still mild mannered as the bodies piled up. so suave.

  • john

    Oh my god. My dick is so flaccid right now

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    If you’re going to be an “auteur,” I think you should at least have a really, really strong, singular creative vision.
    The prequels are just so bland and sterile and generic. Considering George Lucas to be some kind of artistic auteur is like considering a McDonald’s fry cook to be a gourmet chef.
    The point being, if you’re going to apply a pretentious French word to yourself, fucking EARN it.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Hey, my days as a Creep are long behind me.

  • njdss4

    I’m glad Plinkett is returning. I hope it’s not just a one-shot deal, and Plinkett reviews start coming out somewhat regularly.

  • Palpatine

    Are you Jeff Goldblum?!

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    ARE YOU IAN MCDIARMID?!?!?!

  • john

    You need to have lower expectations, not just about this, but about life in general

  • He’s just regular old Palpatine.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I thought Palpatine looked like Ian Mcdiarmid before before he developed his evil, puffy monster face.
    Then I realized that there was no WAY they were one and the same.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    THE MAN. MADE. STAR WARS.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    “I have foreseen it.”

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    FRIENDSHIP made ‘Star Wars.’
    Don’t you ever forget that.

  • njdss4

    I’m trying, but I really, really want more Plinkett reviews.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Am I that Phoenix guy?

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I just want to stop urinating blood.
    Plinkett reviews would be nice, though.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    How can one be both a wizard AND a phoenix.
    That’s TWO THINGS!

  • BCFC25

    Coming soon to youtube in the year 2150!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You’re Oswalt aren’t ya?

  • john

    JEWS MADE … something

    DONT YOU EVER FORGET THAT!

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Jesus Christ. Seeing first-person-review-Plinkett made me feel some nostalgia.
    Now all we need is Mitchell Taco Nash to flood this webzone with comments, Faddlechud to make GIFs and Mark Bisone to start violent rap wars and all will have returned to normal.
    Because I don’t like things that are different.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I…


    …yeah.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    It’s amazing how much time I’ve spent talking about a film I don’t even like that much.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    THE WITCH! THE WITCH!

  • Percy Gryce

    That’ll be great.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    That’ll be super.


    …D’OH!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Be more realistic. It will be 2256.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Coruskant?

  • RLMkeepitup

    factoring in the trump wars and attack of the hillary clones. most wise

  • Percy Gryce

    When did Mike develop vitiligo?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    The Cruz Menace.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Santorum: Rage of the Red Lanterns.

  • Domo

    Side effects from being on Mount Everest and running 1,000 extensions cables up the side to get a cup of coffee.

    And lots of booze to pour into your coffee.

  • Percy Gryce

    And lots of booze to pour into your coffee.

    So you’re to blame?

  • Percy Gryce

    I prefer the Ringu theory of the Star Wars prequels. You watch them and seven days later you want to kill yourself.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    When did RLM get into watersports? Is that like a new thing now that’s OK in mass media?

  • Rick_Berman

    You know Plinkett is a Star trek fan, So i don’t think he has mixed feelings about tearing TFA a new one.

  • Domo

    Well, if Jay just kept a better eye on his insulin supplies, the booze wouldn’t have ended up in their supplies.

    So it’s really Jack’s fault.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Fuck you, Rick Berman.

  • Percy Gryce

    Rick Berman, you’re trying to ruin this comment thread too?

  • RLMkeepitup

    it certainly gave mr. plinkett a case of the mountain dews

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Beat me to it.

  • Percy Gryce

    What isn’t?

  • Rick_Berman

    why does everyone want to fuck me?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Return of Jeb/ Revenge of the Mess *airhorn*

  • Percy Gryce

    You may have gone too far in a few places.

  • Domo

    Tru dat!

  • RLMkeepitup

    because you **** everything up, karma train choo choo!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    What is it with dicksss?

  • Imperial_orb

    ♫Ode to Joy♪

  • Domo

    So Palpatine complained about the Ring Theory, but left it up to the commenters to “re-think” what Plinkett really thought about The Force Awakens for what potentially could be months. Leading to endless theories that may never be solved!

    Palpatine outed himself and us as total assholes.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Did we really need to be “outed” as assholes?
    As far as being assholes is concerned, we’re more “out” than the Wachowski sisters.
    #topical

  • Percy Gryce

    The giveaway is that there was no release date. They didn’t even say “Coming Soon.”

    The unfortunately reality of this Plinkett review is that it won’t be released. Ever. It will never come out. It will never be done.

  • Domo

    It probably aired in their Annual Stream-a-Thon that they told us wasn’t going to happen.

    They’ve probably shown it 10 times already and none of us even thought to look.

  • Percy Gryce

    Right. They screened it at PlinkettCon 2015, held in the Favre Lounge at the Waukesha Hilton, on December 13 and 14.

  • Domo

    Do you have your original Matrix Trilogy box set that says “Made by The Wachowski Brothers”?

    Well, so does everyone else. It’s still not worth shit because it’s outdated technology!

  • Imperial_orb

    Ey Mr.Gryce, what happened to Mr.Nicholson?

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Now’s the time for a special re-release, with the words “Wachowski sisters” on the box.
    Which means…
    HOLY SHIT! THE WACHOWSKIS ARE DOING THIS AS AN ADVERTISEMENT FOR NEW BOX SETS!
    #thewachowskisisterscaused911
    #taketheredpill.

  • Domo

    I do think they took the time to show it to some friends they met at the Toronto Fan Expo in 2012.

    http://i.imgur.com/PB3d3po.jpg

  • tOmy`

    Well, let’s not forget the fact that the last semi-positive review was actually promoted by a rape scene.

    So little bit of pissing and some poster-tearing is basically foreshadowing the most positive review ever. And a shitstorm in comment section.

  • tOmy`

    Could be.

    They are definitely not doing it as an advertisement for their ball sets.

  • Domo

    Unless you write a 180 page review checking your facts and create a twitch account to recite it repeatedly because the truth must be known, I can’t take your theory seriously.

  • Ren1

    As we all know so well, sometimes its hard to decipher just what exactly George Lucas thought he was doing.

  • Percy Gryce

    He’ll be back. He used to disappear quite frequently. He’s on either a two-year whaling voyage to the Faroe Islands or a two-month bender in a Bangkok brothel. He just needs to recharge his batteries.

  • tOmy`

    So this day started with new Pre-Rec video and ended with Plinkett Review Trailer.

    Man, Redlettermedium is one emotional rollecoaster.

  • Imperial_orb

    There are rumors of a rough cut screening of the review. And it is said that Rich McEvans was frozen in utter shock at how horrible the review was.

  • tOmy`

    My guess is 1st April.

  • tOmy`

    “Adversity is a form of a-”
    Nah, that doesn’t sound right.
    “World War I is an adver-”
    No…
    “Artform comes from the art of adv-”
    Damn, man, it’s been too long.

  • RLMkeepitup

    im gonna find the pre-rec and ride this backwardz

  • Imperial_orb

    Stop dressing in women’s clothes and tucking your penis behind your legs.

  • Sully

    After watching Plinkett piss, I can now say we have 3 things in common.

  • No! I think that now when Mike went a little overboard and got the Z’dar chin transplant to portray the Palpatine character, that the review is a definite go! When? As soon as possible. To get money to reverse the operation.

  • Foxes don’t use bathrooms, allegedly.

  • OMNI

    Sully!

  • Commander X

    I eagerly await the titanic battle that will occur when RealPlinkett and FakePlinkett (or PrimePlinkett and NegaPlinkett) meet.

  • Unit Ghost

    FUCK YES

  • disqus_fnwCMQDX7u

    I hope this is a troll… there are so many movies that deserve to be roasted by Plinkett more than TFA, and that would be more entertaining to watch.

  • Palpatine

    What are the other 2?

  • Sully

    Our shared loathing of the Prequels, and our love of young hookers women.

  • Sully

    Yes, yes. I’m not dead… yet.

  • disqus_fnwCMQDX7u

    BTW max landis is still butthurt that rlm didn’t think chronicle is a perfect movie, and still under the delusion that they somehow liked the hobbit but hated chronicle, even though they recommended both movies but overall gave chronicle a better review?? the guy’s a real nut job… I have to hand it to rlm for putting up with him, i would not.

  • Sully

    Hey, asshole. At least we don’t have to swim through our own toilet water to get to our front doors.

  • Sully

    Not so much wanting to fuck you as much as you fucking yourself.

  • Domo

    That’s something Patton Oswalt would say.

  • Sully

    Glass 1/2 full-type, I see.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Hiya, Fox. I mean, Patton.

  • Cynical Optimist

    Good Lord that’s the worst case of Shingles I’ve ever seen…

  • Sully

    He and I share a lot in common, except for our height… weight… success… astrological sign… anyway… I feel like I’m getting a little too chummy chummy with the ‘ol Grim Reaper as of late. I’m right in the middle of remodeling my ENTIRE home, I’m supposed to be neck deep in my next screenplay, and now my wife and I (as of Friday) are expecting our second child.
    Shits gettin’ real, real fast.

  • PRESSCONFERANCE: I’m quitting Star Wars. The Internet is bullying me.

  • Congrats man. Another mini Patton.

  • Sully

    Sell your body to Disney. They’ll buy anything these days.

  • Sully

    Am I missing something?

  • Domo

    Here’s hoping that child, when saying Star Wars quotes out of context, will appreciate what you’re talking about instead of running to play on some lousy beach. Congratulations.

  • Sully

    Thanks.

  • Oh I did. They said they’d get back and pick me up. They never did………………………….

  • tOmy`

    Congratulations, man!

  • That you are Patton Oswalt? No, we know.

  • Domo

    Reddit posted that Patton Oswalt was rumored to visit the RLM site. No one has assumed me, yet, because women don’t exist on the internet.

    Be grateful that we cared to assume you were Patton Oswalt.

  • Sully

    I see. Yeah… I’m about a foot taller and two feet thinner than Oswalt.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Yes. As a matter of fact. Everything associated with Star Wars is modestly competent and nothing more.

  • Sully

    Did you rub your nipples? That tends to expedite my business deals. Do gungans have nipples?

  • It’s not a roast. It will probably be inline with the Titanic and ST 2009 style on what the movie means and so on and so forth. They just took a dump on the Prequel lovers and Mike put a classic classic Stoklasa spin on things.

  • Domo

    And your face is that of a fox. This only limits the possibilities of who you are to about 20 people or so.

  • So is everyone else.

    #Fatton

  • Sully

    That’s not nice. They prefer the term “hobbit.”

  • Sully

    Only 20?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    What’s with the weird blue light saber-y thingies that have popped up within the last 10 – 15 minutes?

  • disqus_fnwCMQDX7u

    yeah… still wouldn’t be my choice for a plinkett review, but beggars can’t be choosers i guess.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    See?

  • Ehm, sure. Lot’s of nipples. I “””rub””” them all day…. what the f*ck is wrong with this gu…………

  • Domo

    Well, there’s the people who identify as foxes, and those who had fox reassignment surgery.

    Are you sure you’re not having a litter of kit pups?

  • Palpatine

    I just saw it. Probably some weird Disqus thing.

  • I redact nothing.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    And now they’re gone.

  • That’s right Mr. fnwCMQDX7u

  • Sully

    Def having kit pups. Most likely redheaded red furred.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    That’s it. Use the old reverse psychology on ’em.

  • Domo

    It’s to say there’s a new comment, and then when you click new comment, it pops up to further guide you to the new comment you commented, comment.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Ah, a new feature from The Department of Redundancy Department?

  • Domo

    Yep.

  • Just people with no lives commenting on things that don’t matter. Utter useless failures clinging on to the last things a float from the shipwreck called life.

  • Palpatine

    The Plinkett review of The Force Awakens is going to better than the movie itself.

  • Captain Turbo

    I hope Nadine is back. I’ve run out of fapping material.

  • That’s the tradition.

  • Domo

    Is Nadine going to be an alien posing as an 80s dance instructor?

    Or is it going to be Nadine’s daughter? Someone who looks kinda like Nadine but left in some random dump called Milwaukee with unknown parents?

    I smell a trilogy!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    He’s a good egg.

  • I think it’s more obligation than anything. Star Wars is so intertwined with Plinkett now, most people are expecting it. Plus, Mike’s pretty passionate about the film series, so I’m sure he’d enjoy doing a more in-depth analysis of it.

  • Nadine is a real fun character and I like the actor, Jocelyn Ridgely.

  • I’m just anticipating the inevitable;

    “WHY DIDN’T YOU HATE DIS MOFIE MOAR! IT”S WORSE DAN DA PREQUELS! MIKE’S AN SJW APOLOGIST.”

    and

    “WHY ARE YOU HATIN’ ON DIS MOVIE SHITLORD? R U AN MRA BRODOUCHE? SAD FACE. #YesAllReviewers #Triggering #Pomegranate”

  • Wasn’t that basically Taken? Just without any balls, literally and figuratively?

  • It’s just more STAR WARS SATURATION. YOU CAN”T FUCKING ESCAPE IT!

  • Domo

    That’s why they’re not going to get any pizza rolls.

  • RLMkeepitup

    they’ve dealt okay with fanboy backlash before. even though these movies aren’t as culturally significant (to me) I enjoy all Mike’s reviews where he flex de writing muscles

  • Sully

    You misspelled anal-sis.

  • Palpatine

    Wow, it’s like you can see the future or something.

  • OMNI

    Yay! That was funny!

  • Amontillado

    Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee’s baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You have returned!!!

  • NicCagesHair

    So what movie is Plinkett reviewing? Is it Time Cop? With Jean Claude Van Damme? I hope so!!!!!

  • Domo
  • Sully

    Sorta, kinda.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    Question: The Titanic II is being launched in 2018 – which Plinkett do we start a Kickstarter for to make the trip?

  • Palpatine

    Hells yeah we should!

  • Brendan Paterson

    remember when for some reason mike and jay gave positive reviews of The Force Awakens at four in the morning? I SURE DOOOOO!

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    The Fucking Fraud Awakens…

  • Thanatos2k

    Oh yes, now I remember why I love this site.

  • Thanatos2k

    Internally he regrets not challenging Mike on some of the things he was worried about

  • Space Cop (Video) 2016. Imdb won’t even accept it as a real movie.

  • What if it’s just a commentary track and not a review? Now I can’t sleep.

  • fred
  • Hank_Henshaw
  • Death Ray

    I’ve got the biggest boner I’ve had since Space Cop!

  • RLMkeepitup

    after 4 hours you’re supposed to seek orgasm or medical attention

  • Death Ray

    Fuck that. I’ve got a stable of crater boys to satisfy!

  • GeneralGrievance

    Oh my gaaaawwd! I just jizzed my pants! A new Plinkett review?!? Yes please!

  • Harry Butters

    I haven’t felt this happy visiting your site in years

  • Trent

    How about the Plinkett review of STID you Owe us.

  • Yeah! I would love to see Plinkett review all of the Sexually Transmitted Incurable Diseases he has. Make it happen!

  • Mairsx

    Yeah… ok. That looked… promising.
    But youre not off the hook yet!

  • Sully

    Sexually transmitted infant death? You, sir, are fucking disgusting!!!!

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    A plinkett tease and all the old school come out of the closet.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Remember nadine’s baby? the one she left at home?
    It was taken by Jawas and sold to an old White couple that live in the desert… this writes itself.

  • You’re the worst thing since Pablo Escobar. Which means you’re awesome.

  • Or maybe this is all just a teaser for Space Cop II: A Hawt Dog’s Night.
    #brainexplosion

  • Sully

    As they say, “There has been an awakening.”

  • Beckoning Chasm

    When is the next Plinkett review?

  • I’ll tell you if you ask nicely.

  • Toffoli_73

    Yeah yeah, they’re just stupid kids movies blah blah blah.

  • Mairsx

    I definitely do not remember such a thing, maybe they just had insomnia … Its all slander!

  • Mairsx

    Yeah? Oh Yeah?
    What is the opposite turns out to be true?

  • Tigga, please.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    This review will be the best thing since I hear Darren Aronofsky was doing a Batman movie! That is until I read his and Frank Miller’s bizarre Taxi Driver rip off script.

  • Whoever felt it dealt it.

  • Thanatos2k

    Rectal cancer might be more symbolic.

  • Showbiz Pizza Bear

    But it had great sound design.

  • Thanatos2k

    And Titanic. And even Avatar, to a degree.

  • Did you finally start taking your anti depressant?

  • Plinkett might be reviewing The Force Awakens.
    Cruz might win the Presidency.

    Biggest. Tease. Week. Ever.

  • Space Cop isn’t 4 hours. It just felt that way.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No, you actually die of sheer boredom.

  • That time quadrupled on the second viewing. :-<

  • Or is it going to be Nadine’s daughter? Someone who looks kinda like Nadine but left in some random dump called Milwaukee with unknown parents?

    “That’s the dumbest idea I ever heard.”
    – Denise Crosby

  • Sully

    I blame Andrew. He felt it.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    And it did awaken….

  • In your pants?

  • What is a vagina? I’m a Star Wars/RLM fan, not George Hamilton!

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    to hot for pants.

  • I like your forward-thinking attitude, boiiii.

  • Either way, America is great again?, huh?

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Wait that’s unedited? I only glanced at it before and thought their faces had been swapped or something. What’s wrong with Elijah’s faaace?!

  • Bubs

    If Plinkett doesn’t like my favoritest movie ever, Tha Forse Awaykinz, I’m going to have to write a 108 page manifesto rebuttal to show everyone how MUCH OF A FUCKING IDIOT HE IS!

  • He’s doing his Steve Buscemi impression.

  • Joe

    I am grateful Mr. Plinkett did not continue on to Number #2.

  • Joe Syxpac

    A steady diet of pizza rolls makes number 2 impossible.

  • Hank Schkorio

    There is so much wrong with the Force Awakens, it’s almost Prometheus bad.

  • Bubs

    Yeah… it pretty much just turns number 2 into number 1…

  • Well, life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease so does age matter in the grand scheme of things?

  • tOmy`

    Not to be the one who points out all the corners you have wrote yourself into throughout your lazy career, but haven’t Plinkett already review TFA trailer?

    Was he just dreaming? Was I?

  • Captain_Prickhard

    Is this a real preview or is it just a tease? Remember all the movies Plinkett found while he was trapped in that coffin?

  • Stahp making so much gawd damn sense.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Maybe it was a coma dream USE YOUR FUCKING IMAGINATION!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQPJYnr48yU

  • Earth

    OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!

  • Earth

    You hackfrauds! Now that Space Cop’s done all you can think to do is another Plinkett review? #unoriginalhacks UNSUBSCRIBED!

  • JackDeth

    I hate having original thoughts too.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    I like ‘The Fonze Awakens.’
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kemivUKb4f4
    Its a Milwaukee joke GET IT!

  • “It’l be a whole new scam”

    -Mike Stoklasa

  • So much cop.

  • Percy Gryce

    Incredible TNG Sela callback. Gold star.

  • Big Red

    That first blast of piss was beautiful

  • Loss of blood pressure in the cranial region?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Speaking for myself, this is the only good thing that comes from Disney Force-feeding new Star Wars product every year: The promise of a new Plinkett each time in response.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Cruz might win the Presidency. Hah,de,har,de,har.

    By the way, your mother’s a c#nt.

  • nervathewise

    ‘Blast’? That was a geyser, mate! A horribly floppy geyser!

  • Kawaii as Fuck

    Yaaaaaaay! I truly thought Plinkett was gone for good, I can’t believe it’s already been over 3 years since the Titanic review.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Forget TFA, Mr. Plinkett. There’s a new Max Landis movie.

    http://tinyurl.com/zboc8co

  • nervathewise

    I hope Plinkett gives this boring, derivative and repetitive film a good kicking.

  • tOmy`

    And now it’s only couple of months till Disney takes down TFA as well!

  • Palpatine

    But mean ol’ Mr. Plinkett shouldn’t hurt little Maxy’s feewings!

  • tOmy`

    I assume this was his attempt at making American Ultra look like Citizen Kane.

  • tOmy`

    #WeMissOldManson

  • tOmy`
  • Sully

    According to Law & Order:SVU, yes.

  • capitandelespacio

    “There’s no Star Wars VII Plinkett Review”
    -George Lucas

  • This makes Truffaut look like an asshole

  • Sully

    All over the new carpet.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    We may not have noticed it, but tOmy’s brain did…

  • WrongWithYourFace

    That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.

  • tOmy`

    I am the kinda cheerleader that demands answers. Like how is it possible that jet fuel melts steel beams?!

  • Now I Get It
  • junkevil

    no one care about plinkett reviews, when is the next episode of gamestation 2.0?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Baby Jesus weeps.
    Just secede already Texas.

  • tOmy`

    I am just glad that someone is finally asking important questions:

    Does Hillary Clinton swallow cum?
    Where were the dinosaurs on the Ark?

    These are the things I need to know. Thank you, America!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I already knew the Teddy Roosevelt bear-child thing though.

    History was my favorite subject.

    Seriously, the Texas School Board is responsible for textbooks that are approved and used across the entire nation. Is it a surprise that ‘Mericans grow up to be Re-pube-lickers?

  • Palpatine

    Don’t you mean DudeBros?

  • capitandelespacio

    At this rate with Hollywood rebooting any garbage they find, I would not be surprised if we have The Grabowskis rebooted anytime soon.

  • Would someone please slit the guys throat who came up with this. ISIS please help us. Who does JJ think he is, Roland Emmerich? How many c*cks can he fit in his *ss. Paramount, Disney and now Valve. So many c*cks.

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2697688/?ref_=nm_flmg_prd_3

  • tOmy`

    NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO FUCK NO GET FUCKED.

    Well, we did call it couple of months back, but still, allow me to indulge myself:

    NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO GET FUCKED BASTARDS

  • Palpatine

    I hope that Plinkett does commentaries on the other two Prequels before the review comes out.

  • Palpatine

    Gabe Newell is a fat sellout!

  • Oh. Missed that. I read about something something back in 2013 about a potential movie.

    Well. It’s a valuable IP and could work well at the box office…. you get the idea. Who to call? Roland Emm… JJ Abrams. His corporate suit shrunk his brain and Disney bought his soul so there you go. Damn. Well, what to expect. It’s Hollywood.

  • tOmy`

    Oh, I know it has been in talks for some time. I am just training for my actual reaction when someone greenlits a game that is impossible to be turned into a movie and is considered one of the best games out there.

    Then again, remember Doom? Ha.

    Fan trivia: I also had the same reaction when Square Enix sold the rights for DE to Hollywood as well. Like… there is only certain amount of shit I can stomach.

  • Palpatine

    Have there been any good video game movies? As if I need to ask.

  • It’s going to be action shlock but they’ll market it as brainy action shlock.

    #TotalRecal2012

  • tOmy`

    I hope Gabe realizes that once Gordon says the first word, the whole fucking point of the franchise will collapse.

    We got kinda lucky that it didn’t collapse with Half Life 2.

  • tOmy`

    Well…

    I think someone came up with something watchable when we talked about this. I am not sure myself. Some people claim that Silent Hill wasn’t 100% abortion, yet I do vaguely remember almost walking out.

    Tomb Raider movie was… I don’t actually remember. But there are definitely more examples of total clusterfucks than movies that sorta worked.

  • Super Mario Bros and Max Payne!

  • Palpatine

    Those are classics!

  • It’s for teens. It will sell. The fans will buy tickets too…. whats that…. work… working… it works fine.. see all the money.

    -JJ

  • Idiocracy is real. Time to stock up on electrolites.

  • Resident Evil kindof works…. it has a shlocky charm.

  • Is his child the Man-Bear-Pig?

  • tOmy`

    The most worrying aspect is that they will have to come up with actual plot for Half Life 1. Let’s be honest, the amount of plot in Half Life 1 hardly justifies a movie remake.

    So they will add on top of it, possibly tying it to Half Life 2 plot, because hey, there is enough of material for at least 3 movies. And then everything falls apart.

  • tOmy`

    The first one was sorta watchable. I liked the ending.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    SH was abortion. There’s no such thing as a ‘good’ vg movie. Not yet anyway,

    # Our only hope is Ass Creed

    # starring Magneto

  • So I guess Dog is getting a red coat of paint.

  • Ending? The zombies? Havent seen it in 10 years. I like parts of the atmosphere. The “”acting”” also gives it a fun watch appeal. The concept is great with the virus.

  • tOmy`

    Ass Creed could actually work. Nice setting, badass action, put in some real parkour… make it simple, cash in.

    Then again, we weren’t able to make Tomb Raider / Silent Hill / Max Payner work and these things are basically written already, all they had to do was not fuck up horribly.

  • Not a chance. Unfortunately, only Mortal Kombat did the source material justice. It was as schlocky as the game.

  • dollar store cashier wife
  • dollar store cashier wife

    Ass creed games suck. But I really liked the director’s previous film and Fassy is a good actor. If I were a betting man I bet on AC movie being serviceable.

  • tOmy`

    I actually haven’t seen it in years as well, but I do remember the Red Queen (citation needed), kinda cool OST and the “cliffhanger” ending, when the main character escapes the facility and sees the wreckage of the city outside.

    So she just casually grabs the shotgun and her cocking it cuts the movie to end credits.

    Although, that’s how you end the movie franchise, not start pushing it off the cliff.

  • Max Payne made me want to gouge my fucking eyes out. I did like SMB, though. It was a beautiful disaster.

  • Like Icare

    Truffaut? More like Fauxfaut.

  • tOmy`

    Oh! Oh! Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children is pretty awesome.

  • Ehm…. It’s for teens. It will sell. The fans will buy tickets too….

    But I get you. No, it’s not gonna work, It’ll be a gamerservice TotalRecall2012. They’ll have the story and they’ll boost it up as you say and it will inflate. To even imagine the odds for this movie being good is staggering.

  • Oh yea.. kindof cool… WAIT WHAT?

  • tOmy`

    Imagine them just following the genres within the game:

    Sci-fi to survival horror to action movie to sci-fi action to goddamn sci-fantasy in different dimension.

    Not only will it look stoopit, it will also fall on its face faster than headcrab.

  • Watching SMB is really interresting. Knowing that Hoskins drank heavily on set because of frustration. I mean it’s a kids movie.

  • tOmy`

    Can you imagine that something like this basically had to happen in one meeting:

    “Do you know what Max Payne was missing?”
    “No, what?”
    “Angels.”
    “That’s a great idea!”

    Must have been case of this or something: https://youtu.be/vuNN1D-FCjs?t=32s

  • Michael Collins

    Why?

  • Actually know parts of the lyrics thanks to Plinkett.So educational.

  • Sloppy Bauman writing. A+

  • Red Skeleton

    I hope they split it into multiple parts so they can get it made faster!

  • Michael Collins

    Is it true you don’t like blacks?

  • Like Bill Cosby?

  • Michael Collins

    Didn’t you post in here recently you don’t like blacks or something?

  • Like Icare

    Something more Iron Man would probably be more appropriate.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bronze_Fonz

    He was cast in bronze,
    On Milwaukee River shores.
    Where he stands and grins,
    For Milwaukee citizens.

  • What? I’ve quoted Hitler, Stalin, Mao and W Bush. Read Mein Kampf while watching an Adam Sandler movie. I’ve slapped Japs. Told people to shoot Indians. Called comicbook dorks retards. Then there are the usual 9/11 jokes, callbacks to gulags. Talked about my dream of oneday tap-dancing on Bowies grave. But blacks… no don’t recall. Should I do a rant about blacks?

  • Like Icare

    It’s a definition of reviewing under diminished mental capacities.

  • Michael Collins

    Oh I’m sorry, you’re right, it was Japs you said you don’t like.
    My wife, who’s a Jap, and my daughter, who’s mostly a Jap, didn’t get it.
    Lucky they aren’t Jews I suppose.

  • Palpatine

    Because why not.

  • Oh………………… well. Ehm. I um…….

  • Michael Collins

    I still think it’s lucky they aren’t Jews, but …. well…

  • Heh, yea jews…….. Well the jap thing started while I was researching propaganda from WW2. I’ve tried to learn how the machinery works to shift public opinion about japs. Pearl Harbour was one thing but the response another.

    It was total political, media and market saturation. From superman comicbooks to the ordained priest to worker to policy maker to child to soldier to a can of beans to the educational system to the housewife. It was war god damnit!

    The Jap was an untrustworthy rapist crosseyed rat. Just look at all the posters on google. Easy to find.

  • Like Icare

    Power of Plinkett compels you.

  • Michael Collins

    Oh they were cunts, no doubt about it, they’ve paid for that though, pretty harshly as well.
    That’s in the past, where it should be left.

    We could discuss the US’s transgressions since back then, but that would be pointless…..I reckon.

  • Like Icare

    Well… he can always take the high road and become the new Hitler.

  • Like Icare

    Third of the Return of the King is “more about things and how they work”.
    Down to quite literally languages and alphabets invented for the purpose of illustrations in the book.

    The thing is that “things” in Tolkien’s world work according to the set underlying rules and don’t contradict itself (all power comes from GOD) – while Lucas tried to explain magic that binds the universe together (in OT) with biology (in prequels).

    Also, while both Lucas AND Tolkien wrote their stories over many years, tweaking and polishing them as they went along – Tolkien didn’t return to the universe decades later to slap together another trilogy in a week.

  • Like Icare

    Rise? You misspelled “reach”.

  • Ogrot

    How can we get another Plinkett Star Wars review when you lazy hacks haven’t even made a colorful Guardians of the Galaxyesque reboot of Richard Edlund vs. His Sons?

  • Like Icare

    Get a bird to do it for ya.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drinking_bird

  • tOmy`

    I would like to point out that there is a Fort Minor track about it, but I am not sure if it won’t devaluate the whole discussion.

    But no worries, we all know you are just doing a character. Who ever seen a racist frog before, amirite?

  • Like Icare

    Speaking of beautiful disasters…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sna5oHDZCvc

  • Well. To be honest no I dont think that way. Even the average japanese had a place in the destiny of the Kingdom or Empire of Japan. Everyone in Japan could be called upon to become as we call today “state material”. To die for the empire, emperor and the sovereign destiny of Japan was in most part a something that everyone had to respond to. Not like an actual death but a sacrifice.

    It was a horrible system of death where all other nations would bow or die. The product of this system were these “cunts” as you put it. But how should the Americans have responded? I don’t blame anyone really and it was war. But the transition from democracy to a one voice military nation was something the Americans should have fought against.

    Eventhough there is much that suggest that the average Japanese did not believe Japan was a divine kingdom and that most people actually were against a war.

  • No I think it works. Its a voice that tells the story. Tells it well also.

  • So hawt rite now.

  • Sounds like Jack is doing the narration.

  • Palpatine

    Starring Chris Pratt as Richard Edlund and all his sons.

  • Red Skeleton

    Jada “Plinkett” Smith says “We gotta keep it moving.” Days later, Plinkett reawakens. Coincidence? I think NOT.

  • Sully

    So… Spider-Man appears in the new Captain America: Civil War trailer. I suppose that’s Marvel’s attempt to overhype Batman v. Superman. It worked.
    Not that they had much to battle against. For me, BvS gets dumber looking with each new trailer.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Jada’s the key to all this if we can get her working, because we’ve never had a funnier character.

  • tOmy`

    The clash of titans:

    Civil War looks all kinds of meh shaded bland.
    Yawn of Justices looks retarded.

    Brave new world.

  • tOmy`

    I am glad we learnt from past mistak-

    Oh, right.

  • Sully

    If it’s anything like ‘Winter Soldier’ I’ll be a happy fox. That film and The Dark Knight are the gold standard of superhero™ films, imho.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    For me, Civil War is a non-starter. Bivvisdodge has the potential to be a trainwreck of a size previously unseen by man.

    I know which one I’m looking forward to more.

  • tOmy`

    I (almost) always come out of Marvel movies pleasantly surprised.

    I guess that is the part of the trick: Having very low expectations.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    True, which makes Civil War more of a blatant disappointment.

    The only reason it is being forced on us, instead of a more satisfying conclusion to a Captain America trilogy, is because Marvel wants to wag its penis at DC’s “Junior League.”

  • Toffoli_73

    I’m one of those people who just doesn’t get the absolute adoration of TDK. It was fine. Ledger was fine. But is wasn’t some masterpiece. Heck I liked Begins better.

  • Sully

    That’s how I go into every movie. Hype is the quickest route to “Well THAT fucking sucked!”
    If you expect mediocrity, all it can do is match or exceed your expectations… generally speaking. There are exceptions.

  • Toffoli_73

    I keep forgetting BvS comes out in like 2 weeks. There is nothing that excites me about that movie.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Well no one giant eyed Spider-Man. Seriously who was the person at Sony who green lit that stupid costume with the giant eyes. It sounds like the same asshole who thought “You know what? Maybe we should reboot Ghostbusters.” I fucking hate Sony.

  • More of your precious trick or treat garbage, who cares!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKrVegVI0Us

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Upvoted because DARK KNIGHT is no masterpiece.
    BEGINS is still worse, though.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Weird, I’m having the opposite reaction as I see the film keeps looking better and better. It’s not saying much I must say considering Man of fucking Steel was their starting point.

  • Sully

    The last 30 minutes of Begins keeps it from being the top of that trilogy for me. The last 30 minutes of DK is what pushed it over the first.
    For my money, though, I prefer Bane over Nolan’s other villains.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    OH YEAH! OH YEAH! I FUCKING LOVE SPIDER-MAN! FUCKING SPIDER-MAN! TAKE THAT GARFIELD! ANDREW GARFIELD WE DON’T NEED YOU ANY MORE! WE’VE GOT TOM HOLLAND!

  • Toffoli_73

    I’m a sucker for Batman in animated form so the live action movies never appeal to me as much as they could.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Amazingly generic. All the peeps who whine (correctly) about MAN OF STEEL torture porn but get a boner for that are just being (incorrectly) inconsistent as all fyuck.

  • Where is the Hulk? He would rip everyones limbs off in a second.

    #TheKidsCallItPlothole

  • Sully

    Snyder has had too many let downs for me to even consider this film as anything but a destined cluster-fuck. He, like Lucas and Jackson, can make a pretty film, but goddamnit, can he NOT tell a compelling story.

  • tOmy`

    Case in point:

    I enjoyed Age of Ultron, because I was happy they were doing something with the characters and there was a glimpse of an interesting plot (leading to Civil War).

    But let’s face it, “doing something with characters” and “glimpse of a plot” ain’t exactly what you would describe as groundbreaking when it comes to movies in general.

  • They even put a Spidey pic of him on Imbd…. kawai!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    They do deal with all of that damage at least with this and BvS. It would be stupid in a Captain America movie for them not to acknowledge at, scratch that it would be stupid for anyone to ignore it.

  • Toffoli_73

    AoU truly didn’t need to exist. Definition of filler.

  • Sully

    I just hope they don’t nerf Spidey in this. He can easily lift 10 tons in the comics. So with Thor and Hulk gone, he should physically be the strongest presence in this movie.

  • tOmy`

    Except that whole thing when I care about what happens in Civil War and I don’t care about why the goddamn fucking car spins the other way in the Yawn of Justice trailer.

    Inconsistency doesn’t have anything to do with my personal taste.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He didn’t write it. He was a story idea guy, then Ben Affleck kicked out Goyer and Snyder from the screenplay resulting in a rewrite by him and his writer buddy.

  • I don’t know really. I don’t watch these I just whine. I’ve seen half of MoS… sorry.

  • tOmy`

    Well, I think I said it here before, but I think I actually enjoyed it more than Avengers 1.

    I was very shocked to learn that fact.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    At least he looks like the Ditko Spider-Man. Thank you, studios, for embracing comic book designs.

  • Earth

    Wow. The Sam Raimi Spidey outfit is still the best looking out of the three.

  • Oh. I had no idea. Hope it works out… now where did I put my comicbooks… oh that’s right I GREW UP!

    =0

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I don’t blame you. As soon as I saw the trailer and Pa Kent said, “Maybe,” I knew they’d fyucked it up.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “Somebody sure is weeaboo”
    -Shaggy from Skooks.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Alan Moore is gonna kick your ass.

  • Earth

    I don’t know about that. I went into Ant-Man with the lowest expectations and it disappointed even those.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    You think they’re gonna sell it with “Black Panther?”
    This movie is the worst example yet of “inside the beltway.”

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He looks like Deadpool with those eyes. Nice move, Fiege, we won’t be tricked again!

  • Sully

    Fuck the Man of Steel destruction. Why was Lois Lane invited to an arctic black site to report on the government digging up an “anomaly?” And why invite her on a mission to bomb the alien craft in the end?
    And why would Superman push Zod away from his mother to protect her, only to leave her surrounded by 10 other, equally dangerous, aliens? Ahhh… fuck it!

  • I can take him. He’s old =P

  • tOmy`

    Reeeeaaaaaally?

    I think Ant-Man was one of their stronger movies.

  • Earth

    The eyes are weird, and the material and colouring are just terrible.

  • Sully

    Growing up is horse shit. I passed that exit miles and miles ago.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That ending felt studio mandated to me. From what I gather the guy who said that was a good idea was fired resulting in Snyder, Cavill, and everyone else on the film saying they didn’t like it or want it. I hate studio heads who think “MORE ACTION AND EXPLOSIONS” is a good idea.

  • Sully

    Well, it was designed by a teenager; a broke ass teenager from Queens, no less.

  • Earth

    I just remember hating it. It was such an unfunny, boring mess of anti-entertainment.

  • I’d call the trilogy masterful. Not a master piece but masterfully thought out.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I need more close ups. Regardless of how you feel about BvS it’s hard to top that Batsuit in terms of how accurate it is to the comics and the same applies to Deadpool. Why the angular things on his arms and legs?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I’m in the minority, but I think SPIDER-MAN 2 is still better than any movie Marvel has had made.

  • Earth

    I can agree with that.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Nah Winter Soldier is better. Captain America kills people while Spider-Man has a pussy code of ethics.

  • Earth

    Must be a pretty smart teenager, considering he made it entirely out of CG animation.

  • Sully

    Doesn’t matter who wrote it. All that matters is what ends up on the screen. Unless Snyder is plagiarizing his storytelling directly from a graphic novel, I don’t think anything he’s done has stood out as competent storytelling.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    So he found how to make Deadpool eyes?

  • Sully
  • Wizard Phoenix

    True but I don’t know who the fuck directed this movie based on reports. I hear Ben Affleck did some scenes and other scenes Snyder did. Give him some credits, dammit!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Winter Soldier is almost as good, but it was an obvious attempt to “ape” Nolan’s Batman . SPIDER-MAN 2 is excellent all on its own.

  • Earth

    Both BvS and Civil War look like clusterfucks.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Really? I didn’t see that at all. It felt like a great blend of different types of films but not once did it feel like it was trying to copy Nolan’s Batman considering the fact it has the fucking Falcon in it.

  • Earth

    Winter Soldier is definitely one of the better of the Marvel movies.

    Still not as good as Spider-Man 2 though.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    But people don’t want to see Spider-Man save people or deal with his problems any more, Stan Lee. PEOPLE WANT SHOOTING!

  • Earth

    People can want whatever they want. But what they want doesn’t magically make the movie better.

  • Oh. Foxes drive tiny wooden cars. Well actually I like menga. Cyberpunk themed menga…. so that is still very adult. =/

    #Ganguro

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Is Captain America the only superhero that kills people? If so you’re fucked, Iron Man.

  • Sully

    I’d go as far as to say that Spider-Man 2 is the best Spider-Man film to date.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    You can play that game with any of these things, Foxy.
    You know I’m never going to defend Man of Steel, but I’m also gonna call out Disney for the same crap, and I’m especially gonna call out the movie fans who hold to one view of the one and a completely opposite view of the other’s same thing.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    And Amazing Spider-Man 2 is a dumpster fire on par with Batman and Robin.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    The tone and pace of the films are nearly the same.

  • Needs more silverlinings and bat-nipples.

  • Earth

    umm…Iron Man has no issue with killing people

    https://timeoutcdn-new-york.s3.amazonaws.com/GIFs/marvel/4.gif

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I disagree on the tone aspect.

  • I agree.

  • Earth

    Isn’t that just a given?

  • Toffoli_73

    Superman killed people in his early days. Said things like, “They deserved it.” too.

  • Sully

    Technically, which ever side Scarlet Witch is on should win. That gurl is FIERCE!!!

  • tOmy`

    A lot of superheroes don’t.

  • Trent

    Wow you must have serious case of plinkettious to come up with that.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Well at least Aquaman doesn’t kill people. Oh wait…. http://i.newsarama.com/images/i/000/022/839/i02/aqm_cv3_02.jpg

  • Sully

    Batman, too. He once burned some assholes alive, and while they were cooking, he was making out with some bitch (not Robin for once) in some alley.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Aquaman is a violent murderer

  • Toffoli_73

    Wasn’t until the ethics codes that they neutered those guys.

  • tOmy`

    I think the biggest frag count is on Deadpool, Wolverine, Punisher and someone…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Batman doesn’t kill any one. He just gives thugs and villains a giant medical bill and has them stay in a hospital for a mouth.

  • Sully
  • Superman killed alot of people in the 9/11 movie.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    #FishPeopleLivesMatter

  • tOmy`

    I think I have that statistic from comics tho.

  • Sully

    DareDevil. His M.O. is disappearing assholes that slip through the gaps in the legal system.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    By accident, not sure if that counts. If it does then yes, Superman is a violent psychopath.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I want to swim in his beard.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He throws people off of rooftops but he know they’re okay because of his hearing. I shit you not they do that.

  • tOmy`

    He is off to moan somewhere. Thor is off to find the final (second final?) infinity gem.

    They will be back for Infinity War

  • Oh. Oh no a building. Oh. Ups. Oh. Accident people.. totally not my doing.

    “I just had to kill alot of peoole” -Man Of Steel

  • Sully

    Not anymore. Though he has found a loophole. He now just steals kids from orphanages, trains them a bit, and tosses them to the wolves. That way he still fills his death quota, but the blood isn’t technically on his hands.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s great to have Sully back. Wasn’t I just saying the other ay that I missed Sully?

    #CircleJerk4All

  • Sully

    According to Sacha Baron Cohen, that isn’t a beard.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Speaking of raping Spider-Man remembering One More Day? It makes Countdown to Final Crisis look like Crisis on Infinite Earths. Just awful in every single way.

  • Red Skeleton

    “After Earth was the most disappointing thing since my son.” – Will Smith.

  • Earth

    So…this year will be inundated chock-full of not only superheroes movies, but also superheroes in superhero movies.

  • Sully

    Pucker up. It’s time for a fresh coat of lipstick.

  • He did the right right thing!

    https://youtu.be/-YDO8HR_2Xg?t=1m35s

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Maybe Doctor Strange won’t-oh wait Spider-Man might appear in the Doctor Strange film. Whatever happen to stand alone superhero movies?

  • Sully
  • tOmy`

    Don’t forget the game movies; the beginning of the end. The second end.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It was “internet mandated” if anything.
    You don’t remember the whole world , after Singer’s STALKERMAN RETURNS, whining that they wanted a movie with Superman punching stuff?

  • Earth

    Fuck you grampa! Origin movies are so two thousand eight! We’re just gonna throw superheroes at you now and you better have your wikipedia ready!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Remember when Ben Affleck threw him out a green screen-I mean window?

  • Earth

    Oh right, Daredevil is “noble”…

  • Tapeworm

    Oh I hope they’re gonna do the whole Civil War reveal then: “I’m actually Peter Parker”……..”Who?”

    Congrats on the baby fox.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I don’t think game movies are going to catch on. I am looking forward to Warcraft but I don’t think it will be good enough to create a giant trend of game movies.

  • Tapeworm

    Well, they already greenlit sequels to Ass is In Creed

  • Sully

    $uperheroe$.

    See? Pluralizing instantly doubles your profits.

    Pound Sign: The”S”StandsForProfits

  • tOmy`

    There are 4 of them coming out this year alone. I think they do want to restart this trend, cash in as much as they can, burn the whole goddamn place to the ground again and then say:

    “Wellp… better luck next time. Next time being 2020s.”

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Audience mandated because people think Superman is a pussy because of shitty screenwriting.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I hate those games so much.

  • tOmy`

    So that’s why is the game put on hold for this year! They are “helping” with the “movies”.

    As in: $$$$

  • Earth

    What’s a Creed? And why would I put my ass in it?

  • Sully

    You trying to tell me Negasonic Teenage Warhead wasn’t already a household name?! THAT’S HORSESHIT, MOTHERFUCKER!!!

  • Red Skeleton

    ARRGH! Help me, RLM! I’ve got this quote stuck in my head and the internet isn’t helping with it! I know I’ve seen it recently!

    The actual quote is something like “We were [going to be?] the three caballeros…. well, now I guess it’s more like dos compadres.”

    The CONTEXT is hard for me to work out. There’s a slight sneer to it, and I can’t remember if the speaker and another unnamed person are the “dos” and the third “caballero” is being ejected from the group (i.e. being spoken to), or if the third “caballero” has been ejected and the speaker is talking to the “dos”. I seem to recall there’s a slight sinister air to it, like the speaker murdered the person in question.

    Is this from an RLM thing? That’d explain why I can’t find it on the net. It could have been from Walking Dead. My wife says it sounds like something from Buffy and I admit it is kind of a Whedonian thing to say but I don’t THINK I’ve watched anything by him recently… except Toy Story that is…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s got arms wide open.

  • Tapeworm

    Never played, but heard a lot about the shitiness. Still, Fassbender

  • tOmy`

    Speaking of comic book movies: Neil Gaiman still didn’t say a word about Sandman, which means they are still considering it and nobody is pulling the plug.

    *weeps*

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    In case you’re keeping track, this year’s Fassbender is Domhnall Gleeson.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have a new system of rating painfully bad movies in descending order of quality:
    1.Studio mandated and cynically made bad
    2. Kurtzman and Orci bad
    3.Adam Sandler is the main lead bad
    4. Kevin James is the main lead bad
    5. Nick Swardson is the main lead bad.
    I think Ghostbusters will be at Kevin James level hopefully if it’s at Nick Swardson level we’re fucked.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Isn’t that a good thing?

  • Sully

    Thanks, Tape!

  • Tapeworm

    Oh the Ex Machina dude?

  • Negasonic Teenage Warhead? It’s a post 9/11 character. Maybe that’s why, maybe? I don’t know. Zzzzzzzzzz

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No, he’s Kylo Ren’s secret lover according to tumblah.

  • Tapeworm

    So as I was getting into some X-Files production trivia, I found out that Chris Carter and others actually read the message boards and even named like a badass hacker in the show after the commenter with the nick “Da Thinker”

    Imagine like Plinket leaving and saying “I’m going to meet my old gay lover, Percy Gryce”

  • Sully

    Okay, we have 4 things in common.

  • tOmy`

    No. There was a very minor chance of it not sucking, but now they have the writer of Final Destination 5 and G.J.Levitt left the project over some problems with New Line Cinema.

    Sounds like a clusterfuck, and we didn’t even make it to the first trailer yet.

  • Sully

    Just barely. I didn’t like 80% of Raimi’s Spider-Man universe.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He made Don Jon which sucked. I didn’t trust him with the source material at all.

  • Tapeworm

    Thank you. I actually don’t see where people get the “Well, the second one is great though” thing, to me it’s like Revenge of the Sith being best of the Prequels

  • tOmy`

    Well, he was the only one who seemed to excessively care about it, had it as a pet project for years and worked with Neil.

    If there was a slight beam of hope of this not failing miserably, this was it.

  • Tapeworm

    I mean, if he assured that Gaiman’s vision would be somehow preserved…

  • Red Skeleton

    OH! Wait, I finally remembered… it’s from Dragonball Z Abridged series: Android 18 to 16, describing the recent death/absorption of 17.

  • The Resident Evil 2-5 formula. AKA cram it in there, make it fit.

    I remember reading comics like Wolverine and Spider Man and I remember hating crossovers. Smart thing to do is to not cram shit to the max because it will not wor$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    We can only hope that movie never gets made.
    Hollywood needs to reboot “Turn Around.”

  • Earth

    It probably helps that I don’t read comic books and don’t care at all about Spider-Man.

  • Tapeworm

    OK, let’s be civil about this, Red, go silently to the corner and give yourself a wedgie.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Why not Double Team starring Jean Claude Van Damme and Dennis Rodman?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    That was gonna be my guess.

  • Sully

    The difference is, DC has created this cinematic universe under the banner of “a higher standard of superhero film”, and when they make such stupid fucking mistakes, as the ones they made in MoS, they stand out like shit on a sun dress (or whatever that means).
    On the flip side, a goof in an already light and goofy movie doesn’t stand out near as much, which leads to a more enjoyable filmgoing experience.

    At least for me.

  • Earth

    I think the phrase was actually “Three amigos”.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Also in TFA and THE REVENANT and BROOKLYN.

  • Sully

    That’s the opposite of adult.

  • Sully

    Nuh uh.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Sully

    I’ll give Ben credit. He’s an amazing director as it turns out. Fuck that other guy. Fuck him right in his man pussy.

  • 0% chance. Gungin blue balls don’t lie.

    Do you like the new X files (maybe I’ve asked before)?

  • Tapeworm

    Hell yeah

  • Sully

    Dat’s dat 250 IQ, brah.

  • Red Skeleton

    Oh well thank God you showed up to inform me of this NOW. I’ve only been banging my head against the wall for an hour trying to remember this.

  • Trent

    I got the new antibiotics and am hopeful

  • Earth

    I was a bit thrown off by the phrase “three cabaleros”. To be fair, it could’ve been anything.

  • Red Skeleton

    Nope. DBZ abridged is hella tight. Way more entertaining than the source material.

  • Earth

    It’s kinda hilarious how superior the writing in the abridged show is.

  • Craig Rigby

    leaving them no choice but to turn to crime to pay it off…its a self sustaining economy of mooks for him to beat up lol

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Except for “finales”, X-Files is a guaranteed good time.

  • Earth

    Makes sense. He’s doing it because he hates criminals, not because he actually cares about anyone.

  • Ive wathed 2 new eps of the new season. They are great but I kindof wanted not more of the same. Strange because after I watched the old x-files I wanted more of the same. I still think it’s a great show tou.

  • Red Skeleton

    Well, Three Caballeros would be a reference to https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Three_Caballeros. Whether that was their intention or a mistake of mine, I don’t know.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Hey! Batman’s no dummy.

  • Sully

    That whole movie felt studio. It was like a group of execs sat around a table with Snyder going, “We want it to be dark and serious like Nolan’s Batman films, however shot like a Terrence Mallick flick, but whenever a fight breaks out… yeah, just do some of that SuckerPunch shit you did before, but with capes instead of bitches.”

  • Earth

    It’s clearly a reference to the 1987 John Landis film: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUTl8DSYUQA

  • Red Skeleton

    Oooh, Man, Episode 51 (with Perfect Cell’s singing intro) finally dethroned Epsidoe 36 (SS Vegeta v 19) as my favorite episode.

  • Sully

    When’s the last time you saw a mainstream film that was “groundbreaking.”

  • Sully

    Is that Zack from Big Titty Bouncing Game Dead or Alive?

    https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XIHKxZnjK5g/hqdefault.jpg

  • Red Skeleton

    Steve Martin, Chevy Chase, and Martin Short? Well, at least there’s one funny guy in the group. (Wow, I’m getting some serious Ishtar vibes off that film).

  • Eh, where’s Rourke?

  • Earth

    That song is pretty great. I’ll always be a sucker for Vegeta moments though. Loved Vegeta in ep.52.

    Not sure anything can replace the beauty that was the Namek series though.

  • Sully

    One small difference… They loathe us, Tape. Remember?

  • Dios Mio! El muchos Rasismo!

  • Sully

    Spider-Man is the greatest. THE GREATEST!!!!

  • Red Skeleton

    The Cell Saga’s started as a slow boil, I’ll admit. For a while I was just watching to keep up with it but now I’m actually looking forward to each episode. Still, there’s no Guru. Or Nappa.

    And when the hell are they going to do The World’s Strongest? (again).

  • Red Skeleton

    If this is the most racist thing I’ve said today i think I’m doing alright, you fat gunganian fuck.

    OOPS!

  • VvdD

    I’m confused because Adam Sandler is in the middle. which is the worst of the worst? 1 or 5?

  • Sully

    Is this ascending or descending order? Does it end in the middle?
    Iron this shit out, Wizard.

  • Earth

    The writing itself has never dropped in quality. I think the issue is what they have to work with. It’s difficult making a monster that literally drinks people funny.

    I just love the fact that not only is the show funnier (obviously) but the badass and dramatic moments are done better than the original show.

    Also, all of Vegeta’s one-liners are fantastic.

  • Oh, ok. I see where this is going, earthling. Total Planetary Annihilation that’s where. Suck my fat chin!

  • Red Skeleton

    Out of curiosity, what did you think of Coraline? My only complaint is that they changed it to my homestate of Oregon (out of love for Ashland and the Oregon Shakespear festival) BUT they kept in all the voodoo and southern American visual references… which makes NO GODDAMN SENSE,

  • VvdD

    Lol was thinking the same thing..

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    #1 can’t be the worst. By definition it includes 93.87% of Hollywood movies.

  • Sully

    Ah… that explains why I didn’t remember it. Dragonball Z!!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Nick Swardon is the worst. 1 is the best of the worst.

  • VvdD

    Got ya!

  • Sully

    Coraline was cute. My wife loves it.

  • descending order of quality

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Your number has to be higher.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I much preferred THE BOX TROLLS.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He’s a fox, he can’t read.

  • VvdD

    Actually I’d love for Ghostbusters to be the bottom of the barrel. I desire it to be the new standard of bad.. But you’re probably right.

  • Sully

    That fact that this new Ghostbusters exists means it’s at least a six.

    http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lia9xbL6y31qawrd4o1_500.gif

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Not anymore. Now they just ignore us. This morning I posted a photo of Max Landis’s giant penis, and I didn’t even get banned.

  • Sully

    I just needed to double check, because there’s some fucked up shit happening right in the middle of that list.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Ooh, sick burn!

  • Sully

    It was penis-mache.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Kevin James didn’t make Punch Drunk Love that’s why he’s below Sandler.

  • VvdD

    We are still talking about STAR WARS? I thought we were done talking about STAR WARS. We even made fun of clickbait STAR WARS youtube videos.

    I’m sick of hearing about STAR WARS, can’t Plinkett just review that new Ghostbusters movie? I’d like that. Seems like a much better movie for Plinkett to review.

  • I’s like a “Shaka The Walls Fell” reference style rating system.

    And right now a retarded fat neck beard says: “That’s not the exact quote!”

  • Captain_Prickhard

    Nomad MK-15c, V’Ger. or the Whale Probe?
    Headline: A mysterious object will pass near Earth in 2017. Scientists are baffled about its origin.
    https://www.thevintagenews.com/2016/01/20/46784/

  • VvdD

    Yeah, the first 2 numbers are definitely 9.

  • Sully

    Yeah, but Adam Sandler produced just about everything that would’ve put James on this list to begin with.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    You can keep my things. They’ve come to take me home.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    SHAKMA!

  • Still there? I did not want to upvote… cus I don’t have a penis.

  • Captain_Prickhard

    If it’s V’Ger, can I volunteer to merge with Persis Khambatta?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Make it so.

  • Red Skeleton

    Yes, they keep the drama of the show, if not making it better. At least in the more recent episodes. It was all sorta goofy in the early episodes, which kind of pale in comparison.

  • There is a GIF for every occasion… sad or useful? You hu-maans are so strange. Oh pardon, foxes.

  • “An artistic depiction of what the “alien probe” may look like.”

    So much science! *sigh* I’ll be on the bridge, hanging my self.

  • tOmy`

    I vaguely remember liking it. But it’s been long.

  • tOmy`

    Fast 7.

  • Sully

    You’d think an “alien probe” would be a little more asshole friendly. Just sayin’.

  • tOmy`

    Tell them that back in your days, they at least had the decency to crash and let people experiment on them.

    #WakeUpSheeple

  • Captain_Prickhard

    [wakes up in a cold sweat]
    “Bedknobs and broomsticks! It could be The Borg!”

  • Shakma, when the door was closed.

    https://youtu.be/n7h6wDYzTj4?t=17s

  • He’s ok. I don’t mind the not reading and the violent murders he commits that he refers to as “getting food”.

  • Sully
  • tOmy`

    Well, if you are referring to Walker’s “one last ride”, yea, it did happen during the shoot of Fast 7. Or maybe Furious 7.

    For a fanboi, I do have some gaps when it comes to their titles.

  • Sully

    The last 3 all run together for me. I can never tell which is which.

  • tOmy`

    That’s because of the tight script. Their awesomeness casually blends into each other to create something humanity doesn’t even deserve.

  • Tapeworm

    I didn’t get to it yet, kinda going through nostalgia right now.

  • Tapeworm

    Later all the mythos turns into absolute garbage, but till like season 6 it’s great

  • Tapeworm

    You can’t kinda sorta pronounce loathe without it sounding like someone with a severe speech impediment saying “love”

  • Paul S.

    feeling #blessed to be alive and witnessing this rn

  • Captain_Prickhard

    Ghostbusters: “The beast at Tanagra”.

  • Sully

    Sounds like the blurb on the back of a Diesel/Rock gay porn VHS cassette.

  • I have always had problems with the end of 2001 A Space Odyssey with the so called psychedelic space travel moment that lasts 3.7 hours. But I’ve come to love it.
    SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS!
    If we are going to reach the new stage in human development or evolution this reflects perfectly what we don’t understand yet and the long moment of flashy colours gives time to understand that. It’s probably an abstract of that idea. To bad it became more a hippie reference than what it probably was meant to be.

  • Tapeworm

    Oh yeah, imagining Clarke, Kubrick and Trumbull as hippies is kinda funny.

  • Sully

    Donald Trump says, “FUCK YOUR PROGRESSIVE IDEOLOGY!!!”

    Pound Sign: TheBestWords

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Just a suggestion…When you get to the latest mini-series, stop with the fifth episode.

  • Mateusz K.

    Can’t wait for 2019 when this review will finally come.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Drumpf

  • Tapeworm

    I heard, but “luckily” for me I don’t have much time to watch anything, juts bullshit on here and listen to stuff on commute.

  • Yes actually! Screw artyfarty.

  • Tapeworm

    We have an optimist.

  • Oh did he say that? I remember hearing it on someones Iphone. Was it the Daily Show that made jokes about it?

  • Damn Kubrick. I saw Eyes Wide Shut a few days ago. Cant stop thinking about it. And his other movies pop up to. I just want to watch them again.

  • Sully

    Ah yes. Last Week. I saw that episode.
    I’m just terrible at remembering names. I guess that’s why I call everyone “Asshole.”

  • Hank Schkorio

    Then you must love the Force Awakens haha 🙂

  • “rn” Urine?

  • Bubs

    I’ve already watched this teaser trailer more times than the “Phantom Menace Review”. When is the next fuckin Plinkett review?!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    If get a chance, check this link tOmy originally posted.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgoypDIHKAQ

  • Palpatine

    It’s my Star Destroyer!

  • Bubs

    Wow. Are you sure that isn’t an SNL sketch? I’m pretty sure he’s being played by Will Ferrell.

  • Paul S.

    “right now” fam

  • Palpatine

    May 4th.

  • junkevil

    dou-che.

  • Snake Squeezer

    Is Trump Senator Palpy? Darth Drumpf?

  • Snake Squeezer

    When will the blur-ay be released? Summer? How can Mike even be doing this? And, P.S., I thought Mike liked TFA?

  • Palpatine

    He’s my apprentince. Once more the Republican’s shall ruuuuuule America. And, it shall be great again.

  • Palpatine

    April 5th.

  • Snake Squeezer

    I hope you’re telling him to go around threatening pregnant ladies.

  • Palpatine

    Is he really doing that?! WTF?!

  • Sully

    Better keep a chain on ya boi, Palpy.

    http://i.imgur.com/5AZYyer.jpg

  • Wizard Phoenix

    #MakeDonaldPalpAgain

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Interesting seeing how many Republicans see him as the end of their party.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    On a Tuesday.

  • Sully

    Pound Sign: DarwinismHardAtWork

  • Wizard Phoenix

    #FuhrerTrump

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Instead of, you know, Republican voters who support him or you know, themselves for creating the political atmosphere which made him.

  • Captain_Prickhard

    For your listening pleasure:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=go4E4tNGQks

  • White House Down: The Threat From Within. – The CIA and FBI wage a desperate battle to hire all known terrorists to stop the new president from actually doing anything. –

  • *Pulp

  • Now that’s a guy I’d like to see get beheaded by Anakin.

  • Bubs

    In my opinion, the TFA review will not be the “hit piece” that people are expecting it to be. It’ll be what all his other reviews are – a calculated breakdown of what makes the movie work and not work. The reason the TPM review comes off as a breakdown of how bad the movie is, is because SO MUCH is not working in that movie (and the sequels). Then when we look at the Titanic review, there’s a mix of adoration and mocking, when he highlights the solid creative choices and obvious pandering choices made by James Cameron.

    People will probably bitch over the TFA review for years to come, because for the fanboys, he “nitpicked it to death”, and for the TFA haters he will have, “ignored the obvious glaring flaws”. Regardless, you’ll all be wrong, because the review will be an epic masterpiece of flawlessness.

    #RLMFanboi

  • Sully

    So you’re saying it’ll be safe, neither great nor awful… like The Force Awakens.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Garden Variety cancer?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Take all of my upvotes!

  • Bubs

    No, I’m saying it’ll be amazing. But people on both sides of the fence will say it sucks because it doesn’t 100% reflect their opinion. Because internet.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Where’s does that fit on my pain chart?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I did too but that’s because Avengers1 was fucking shite. AoU at least didn’t looked like an expensive tv episode.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Ditto. AM is one of the worst Marvel films.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    #1, obviously.

    And I quote…”Studio mandated and cynically made bad”

  • Sully

    -3

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No TFA falls on my good chart.

  • Toffoli_73

    Kinda like TFA.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I agree with that. My opinion is that is is one of the worse Star Wars films and I think Plinkett will bear that out but I accept that Mike might like it a lot more than I did or like it _despite_ the flaws. (I like Rise of the Planet of the Apes despite _it’s_ flaws for instance) I doubt Mike will go _easy_ on it but he may be forgiving of it’s numerous problems.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “Studio mandated and cynically made good?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Adam Sandler bad?

  • Toffoli_73

    When you say, “one of the worst” do you mean it’s worse than half of the movies so far? Like worse than the prequels or just worse than any of the OT?

  • Geahk Burchill

    I don’t think Abrams is capable of making anything truly awful just as I don’t think he’s capable of making anything truly great. He is stuck with just enough talent to pass but not enough talent to be great at anything.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Gee, Bubs. Seems like, if there weren’t an internet we’d all have the same opinion, because TFA is objectively good?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    He means it’s only better than the prequels.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I place it as “third worst” as in, better than AOTC or TPM but worse than ROTS or ROTJ

  • tim

    Because you are so dense!

  • Toffoli_73

    I liked 75% of TFA better than 75% of Jedi if that makes sense. Worse than Sith? That movie is cringe worthy in a way that TFA can’t match.

  • Sully

    He’s like a pilot fish, living off of the success of a bigger shark. Sea what I did there? Shark/fish reference? Spielberg? Spielberg made Jaws? Abrams borrows a lot of his style from Spielberg? Sea? SEEEAAAAA?!?!

  • Sully

    NEGATIVE 3, MOTHERFUCKER!!!
    Apparently phoenix’s can’t read either.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Have an upvote, Cpt. Salty.

  • Toffoli_73

    Is it possible for there to be anything worse than the prequels?

  • Geahk Burchill

    ROTS didn’t do as much harm. I feel TFA did actual lasting harm to the original trilogy and characters. I am far more offended by the choices Abrams and Disney made in that film than I am by ROTS.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Everything you just said is wrong you hack!
    I know its wrong because I didnt say it.

  • Toffoli_73

    Wow I have the opposite view. I thought they did a good job to avoid shitting on established characters. Whereas all three prequels caused explosive diarrhea, ROTS included.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Why would you say that in public! now they are going to reboot Jaws…

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    The thing is, Mike’s likings change very easily. He already dislikes The Revenant and will despise Deadpool in about two months. He was deprived of sleep, hyped and possibly drunk when they reviewed TFA. Once he’s back to earth and watches the DVD…who knows what will happen.

  • Mangiagli1145

    I thought TFA was the best movie of 2015. Then again, I enjoyed Jurassic World and San Andreas and I disliked Mad Max: Fury Road, The Hateful Eight and The Revenant.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I agree the Prequels shit on the original trilogy but I can ignore them. My head canon doesn’t include the Prequels. (I prefer what Belated Media did with their ‘What if Episode X was Good’?) In TFA, I expected certain things going in that are logical extensions of the characters. The characters should have evolved and so should have the universe instead of reverting back to 1977.

    I really expected Leia to essentially be Mon Mothma. I assumed we would start the film with a young new Republic having been built up over the last 30 years with Leia as sort of a George Washington figure.

    

I expected GENERAL Solo
    to be managing a fragile peace between the New Republic and the
    remnants of a shattered Empire, struggling to maintain a border region which resembles a powder keg.

    I expected Luke, the new head of a fledgling Jedi Order working to recapture the best of what the order had been while learning the lessons of the past.

    You know, interesting characters dealing with difficult challenges as the fragile utopia they have attempted to build is put in danger once again by the machinations of a jealous and vengeful empire. I expected to care about these characters and be invested in the world they lived in.

  • Sully

    So. They’ve already rebooted Ghostbusters.
    GHOSTBUSTERS!!! They took Pixels and added Slimer to it.

  • Toffoli_73

    Could they have done something better? I think so. But I don’t think they truly ruined characters prequel-style.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Flaws are in the eye of the beholder. They are not agreed upon by everyone.

    As I said on here when the HitB review came out, I can totally understand why someone did not like TFA. That’s why we’re all here; to chat about such things. But to say that someone likes it “despite its flaws” or that they “forgave its numerous problems” implies that everyone has seemingly agreed that there are numerous flaws, and the only reason one could like the film is because of leniency. That doesn’t sit right with me and to make such assumptions seems a little condescending.

  • Oh. Ehm…………………. *feeling old and stupid*

  • Toffoli_73

    TFA has some nasty cracks in it, but the prequels were an incoherent pile of rubble.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    He recommended Star Trek:Into Darkness. After it did every single thing he wanted it to not do in ST 09 review. Let’s just face it. His standards killed themselfs after 5 years of HiTB.

  • luvs2pwge

    Yeah, well, you know, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.

  • Toffoli_73

    They’ve recommended plenty of films they didn’t necessarily like. They did do a mini Plinkett review on ST:ID.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I analized HiTB with a team of cheerleaders. After I promised to let them go out of my rat infested basement we agreed that after you can compliment something for “not being an Adam Sandler/M.Bay film” you’ve reached the bottom of the barrel in terms of expectations,critique and standards.

  • luvs2pwge

    Pixels was better than getting leprosy

  • dollar store cashier wife

    THAT’S RIGHT JAY!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Oh negative 3 on the great meter. So that’s like Spider-Man 2 good.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Yeah those exist.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Gotta love that new costume! http://i.imgur.com/RoDzxMb.jpeg

  • Geahk Burchill

    I don’t think it implies that at all. I think it is exactly what it is on the surface. “I think the film has numerous flaws.” We know Mike thinks it has flaws, he stated that in the HitB review. In fact, he has said, “No film is perfect except Ghostbusters and The Rocketeer.” He knows all films have flaws. My stating that I find the flaws more intolerable than others implies nothing about the commonality of those flaws. There may be plenty of things Mike sees as flaws in TFA that I don’t and probably more that I see as flaws that Mike won’t.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Here’s the biggest issue with why your reasons why you didn’t like it; it’s all based on what you wanted and you are judging the film by it’s own merits.

  • Geahk Burchill

    I guess it’s a matter of degree. The breadth of short-coming is the point up for discussion. I think the shortcomings of ROTS were largely a hangover of the previous two movies. ROTS was surprisingly corrective (As bad as it was) of the previous two films but ultimately, I can ignore everything all three films did. They harmed Vader but but only if you care. To be frank, I care a lot more about Leia, Han and Luke than I do about Vader. Yes, ROTS could have been much better. But TFA could have been SO MUCH BETTER. The missteps in ROTS were partly unavoidable because they had written themselves into a box. The missteps in TFA were entirely avoidable an inexcusable. In my view TFA is one of the greater missed opportunities in all of film making. It falls into the Godfather Part III, or Alien IV category of pure failure. It was as a prettily spray-painted and rhinestoned sandcastle. Flash built on no substance. Disney and Abrams started from entirely the wrong platform and built a house of cards on top of it.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    “Movies make me wish I was dead.”
    -Mike Stoklasa.

  • Geahk Burchill

    Yup. Like all films. Like you are with the new Ghostbusters. Like any media humans participate in. Does it match up with my hopes and expectations? No? Than it failed in my view.

  • Do people still care about Star Wars at this point? #yolo #xoxo

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    That is fucking brilliant! But it should be the SS(Is it just me or do the Secret Service need a better acronym.) and a team of navy seals have to protect the white house from Drumpf and an army of ignorant morons(Middle Americans.)
    and they fail.
    then Drumpf builds a Drumpf Tower on the ruins of the White House.
    and opens it on 911.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Shhhh. he is our best chance of a brutal world wide war that will destroy humanity!

  • This is the worst comment ever, but it’s true. I instantly approve this message.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Or where your expectations to high…
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLrpBLDWyCI

  • Palpatine

    Yes. This.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I think it does imply something about the commonality of them, because just by saying you find them more intolerable than others implies that others have acknowledged them as flaws in the first place.

    You said that Mike is forgiving of them, not “I think there are numerous flaws.” And you might be right. But what I’m trying to get at is that leniency isn’t the only possible reason a person might like the film. And I agree with the second half of what you said, what’s a flaw to you might not be a flaw to someone else. So implying that someone “forgave” them implies that someone believed them to be flaws in the first place. That’s what I disagree with.

    Also, I just wanna convey that this isn’t nearly as combative as the internet might be making it sound. Just having a chat. About Star Wars. Again. A franchise I really don’t even like that much. I still don’t know why I’m here.

  • tim

    Its gonna be great!

  • Geahk Burchill

    Lots of others HAVE seen the same flaws. Practically everyone I talk to. There are things others point out as flaws that I didn’t see and there is bound to be a lot Mike DOESN’T see as a flaw at all. So no, I reject your belief there is an implied commonality by necessity. Only that lots of people see a tremendous number of flaws and that there is some consensus about SOME of those flaws. And some people WILL forgive things that they see as flaws (The way I forgive the flaws in Ang Lee’s Hulk because I enjoy more of the movie than I dislike by a wide margin)

    No, pointing out a film has flaws says nothing at all about what I think others perceive as flaws.

  • MichaelKz

    I like Star Trek: First Contact, but I thought the Plinkett review of that movie was accurate and hilarious. I expect the same for The Force Awakens review.

  • Nerd Culture…………………………….. oh…………………… so good……………

    Nah, I’m just kidding. Hey! You’re alright. And guess the *bleep* I’ll be watching menga next week. Cowboy Bebop and Bubble Gum Crisis.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Welp, agree to disagree my friend

  • Wizard Phoenix

    But you want it to be exact. The new Ghostbusters I knew that it would never ever capture the magic of the original but I expect something decent from the director but instead we’re getting a piece of shit cash grab which I should have realized because Sony fucking Pictures is making it.

  • First Contact is a fun watch and I also like the movie. Plus, the special effects felt more real than any Marvel movie.

    But still, be warned about mixing expectations and RLM.

    #SpaceCop

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    All movies have flaws.

    Well, except for two of them.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Of course. But not everyone has to agree on how many of them there are and what they are, and then judge the film by that set of criteria.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Oh, sure it’s possible. Both objectively and subjectively possible.

  • Like Icare

    TFA elevates the prequels.

    In the universe where prequels were never made, TFA is just another Battle For Endor or Caravan of Courage.
    Whothefuckcares characters, a generic story no one clearly cared about and a lot of baby crap and childish morality lessons – only with a bigger budget.

    BUT, this being that other universe… and TFA being a much touted “for realz Star Warz”… which turned our to be just generic crap… it makes the just plain old bad of the prequels into arthouse bad.
    Yes… it’s shit. But it is exactly the kind of shit Lucas wanted to make and by god’s genital warts – he did it.
    He stylistically designed the shit out of that shit.

    Phantom Menace most of all.
    He clearly had to make changes to the rest of the movies due to all the backlash over Jar Jar, so that’s the only one where his “artistic vision” is intact.

    TFA makes Phantom Menace less of Ed Wood and more of a Alejandro Jodorowsky-like production.

    Similarly, you look at Attack of the Clones post TFA and you go “Well… I GUESS it’s kindofa Romeo and Juliet in space, whose love and secret marriage brings forth their downfall and the ruin to their families – the family of space-knights and the family of space-democracy… kinda… it rhymes a bit…”

    And by the Revenge of Sith Lucas is clearly trying to learn from his mistakes but he keeps failing.
    So much so that you can no longer be angry at him any more than you could be angry at Ed Wood.

    TFA absolved Lucas of any guilt or fault in making the prequels, and it turned prequels into art.
    It set the new standards for exploitative corporate cash grabs, generic rehashing of the same old story and even for misguided attempts at political correctness.

    Just imagine the prequels where the story is identical to the original trilogy, where there is a THIRD toy robot, where Anakin remains as “awesome” as he was in the Phantom Menace (where he accidentally keeps solving everyone’s problems and even winning the final battle – because of the will of the Force) and where the movies keep tripping over themselves to push some politically correct agenda.

    TFA made the prequels into auteur films.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Nobody has to agree on anything, except, I’d argue, for scientifically indisputable things. And, then, there are always gonna be morons who think they’re entitled to a contrary opinion.

    In pop culture, there are no truths. Each of us see these things with our own set of standards.

  • MichaelKz

    Michael Bay’s Transformers movies.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Actually, it depends on your definition of awful, I’m absolutely certain Abrams is capable of making Zach Snyder-level crap. If he were ever to do anything that wasn’t a copy or rejiggering of something that already existed in an easily copied form, I can almost guarantee it would be horrible.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Bingo bango.

    The point I’m trying to make is that (for example) when the TFA review came out, there were any number of passers-by in here yelling at Mike for “ignoring the flaws”

    And my response is who the hell says they’re flaws in the first place? You? Who gives a crap? Why does Mike or anyone have to judge the film in accordance with whatever your standards are?

    So f*ck off, fictional person that I made up out of an assortment of half-remembered throw away comments.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have discovered why Ghostbusters is going to be bad. Jeff Robinov, the guy who made the unwatchable ending of Man of Steel, is now a big wig at Sony and green lit the project.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    We’re right and wrong, though. “Why does anyone have to judge the films in accordance with whatever your standards are?” works all ways. Why would anyone have to agree with Mike, if they didn’t agree with Mike? Our way — I’m talking each of ours — is, really, the only way we see the world. It’s THE way, as far as every one of us is concerned.

    Now, I can fake a kind of empathy where I make room for all ranges of opinions, but, deep down, I know I’m “right.” At least as right as I’m ever going to need or bother with.

    That’s why tOmy is re-thinking the whole Kanye West thing.

  • “Just imagine how much cooler that shot of Spider-man would have been if you went into Civil War not having already seen it.”

    -Jay Bauman (Licensed Shlock Auteur) via Twitter

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    That’th the truth about all trailers.

    It’s true for every fyucking movie.

  • NicCagesHair

    This looks outstanding. The photo-shopped faces on the poster don’t give me pause and when I think Elijah Wood, I think “Action Hero!!!!”

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Sure. Nothing wrong with knowing your opinion is the right one. Just don’t wag a finger in my face and try to foist it on me. There’s a difference between discourse about a difference of opinion and just talking your opinions at someone.

  • tOmy`

    That’s what Max Landis and Nemo understood:

    The best moment of the movie is not in the trailer.

    Oh, wait it sorta is, but still.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Right on.

  • If Star Wars taught us anything it’s:❤$❤$❤$❤$❤$❤$

  • dollar store cashier wife

    “Space Cop trailer should have been just two minutes of black screen. No audio either. Gotta set realistic expectations!”

    -Garrett Gilchrist, rogerebert.com

  • The fat slobs must be coerced to go to the theaters. Where is that crotchshot of Spiderman? Slap it in the trailer and churn it out. And for Gods sake tell Scarlett to puff up those t*ts, her face is sagging and she’s over 30. Ask her if she wants a witch role.

  • Sully

    Mike is motherfuckin’ right!

  • Sully

    Around there. Maybe.

  • tOmy`

    I think the “witch” role of this movie has been already cast, but they can’t call her that.

    GET IT?! GET IT?! SO MUCH NERDISM OLOLO

    I am of course talking about Nick Fury.

  • “Twitter friends are friends to. Screw RLM”

    -Garrett Gilchrist

  • SPOILERS! She’ll marry the Hulk at the end and have green babies.

    Ehm. I have no idea who Nick is. Just the way I like it.

  • tOmy`

    The only black guy in the cast.

    Can’t you tell by his name? He is constantly angry and he nicks stuff.

    #BlackLivesMatter

  • Oh Samuel J. Ok. I remember him. He was in Star Wars.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “Higher standard of superhero film”? Where is THAT coming from?

    And, you call WINTER SOLDIER “light and goofy?”

    It’s like you went away and became a whole different fox before you came back. It’s like, I don’t even know you anymore.

    #Sniffles

  • tOmy`

    I really wish Marvel would call one of their black characters by something else than Black Panther, which sounds like the most subtle reference to Black Panthers ever.

    Would be cool to see a black character being called something like Super Bobby. Or Chad.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Janiqua?

  • tOmy`

    “Ja… jan… Janegr- Oh, right, we can’t do that, can we?”

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Speaking of The Fart Awakens I just watched Sisters. You know the Tina Fey and Amy Poehler gurl comedy that premiered in theatre’s the exact same weekend as TFA did? Anyways half[if not more]of the film was just poop jokes,queef jokes,anal sex jokes and shitty pop culture references. [UN]shockingly enough they were lazy too. The other half of the movie tries to trick you thinking it’s got a heart. Aren’t these gurls supposed to be one of the better female comedians working today?

    All in all I give it Equality/10.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “I guess not. So, we’re all agreed? Back to The Earth-Shaking Shaquanda, then?”

  • Earth

    His analysis of it as a “less-than-stellar Borg movie” is apt.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    My point exactly. When half of the movies made are made by women, we won’t be getting better movies. We’ll just be getting half of the bad ones made by women.

    #Progress

  • Cream-A-Thon

    I think Black Vulcan would agree:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKbGnzmidsw

  • Earth

    I didn’t like that there was an “even bigger death star” in TFA. That isn’t a flaw though. It’s just an element of the story I personally didn’t like.

  • Bubs

    I think you meant “”””””””””””””””””””””””””””””comedy””””””””””””””””””””””””””””””.

  • tOmy`

    “Okay, fine. We can move to the next agenda on the sche- Yes, Bob, what is it? No! I already told you Apeman is out of the question!”

  • dollar store cashier wife

    #womendirectorlivesmatter

  • tOmy`

    Okay, I am starting to hate myself.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    #WachowskisJustDoubledThe#OfWomenBlockbusterDirectors

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    We’re being so racist right now!

  • Earth

    You can tell they were still trying to figure out what the fuck they were doing early on. They did hit on the genius concepts that were Nappa and Mr Popo though.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    “But. He’s an orangutan. Calling him Red Monkey pisses him off.”

  • tOmy`

    We should start a rap career.

    Or just open any business in south USA.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    They should have given it to Spike Lee. He would’ve named him Frequency Vibrations.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Political Correctness is 4 Pussies!

    High-five me, bro!

  • tOmy`

    But ultimate ones! They are definitely better than the amazing ones.

  • Earth

    I stand by the fact that bitching about a movie for 45 minutes and then giving it a half-hearted recommendation is not the same as “He recommended Star Trek:Into Darkness”.

  • tOmy`

    o

    (That’s how kewl kidz do it)

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    This Business Is 4 Everyone

    (No Homos Though)

  • Palpatine

    You sexist!

  • African Man. The Kenya Ranger. Jungle Boy. Lion Drummer. Just fine names. What’s your problem?

  • Palpatine

    Why isn’t Plinkett reviewing The Matrix sequels like he said he would five years ago? Unsubscribe!

  • The Summer of George

    “Professor Malcolm X”?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    DC has a character named B’wana Beast.

    #NoSh!t

  • He said he would? I don’t even remember.

  • tOmy`

    Sounds like one of them characters who won’t make it to the end titles.

  • Palpatine

    How about “Super Fly”?

  • I loved Tina Fey on 30 Rock… and wasn’t Poehler in Community? You’d have thought they’d make better writers.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    How about just plain Supa Mothafukka?

  • Are you retroactively counting in the Matrix Trilogy too?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    No. They were brothers when they made those.

  • Palpatine

    He said we would but didn’t! I want more Plinkett reviews! And ice cream!

  • Domo

    Plinkett asked in “Star Trek Into Reference”. The comments voted on it.

    http://redlettermedia.com/mr-plinkett-star-trek-into-reference/

  • Admiral Bone-to-Pick

    For an awful moment, I thought we’d next have to watch Plinkett say “Number two…” (Eh, maybe they’re saving it for the review itself.)

  • Ah, so he’s pulling the ol’ show contempt to your audience shtick.

  • Are you a cousin of Red Skeleton? Or am I being racist (skeletonist)?

  • They were brothers in… well… flesh… they might have identified as women a long time ago…

  • dollar store cashier wife

    pfff suckers.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Let me see your I.D.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    You got a bone-to-pick dude?

  • Like Icare

    Matrix can no longer be reviewed cause that would now be misojean… masochi… muskra… politically incorrect.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I wanted to ask you guyz/galz/fagz something I’ve been thinking about today:
    Would you describe RLM as a subculture?

  • Like Icare

    Have some respect.
    He’s a veteran of the Clone Wars.

  • tOmy`

    No.

  • A subculture? No, not really. Subcultures are sort of dead… well apart from maybe nerds.

  • Oh, so that’s what’s wrong with his… *starts making circular motion around his face*

  • tOmy`
  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Why? So resolute…

  • They’re not as strict/hermetic as they used to be, though.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Can I describe it as an anonymous alcoholics meeting instead?

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Ehhhh, I would disagree with you there…

  • Palpatine

    Personally, no, I wouldn’t.

  • Yes. This.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    they haven’t written it. though they have produced it and some other gurl wrote the script!!!

  • Like Icare

    Smaller communities have been referred to as such, but I think that it lacks cohesion.
    RLM and its fans are more of a phenomenon.

  • In order for RLM to be a subculture you’d need to identify as an RLMer or something. Do you identify as something like this?

  • tOmy`

    Yea, that sounded a bit harsh, sorry.

    “We” just simply don’t fit the description of subculture and / or we don’t meet certain criteria. Plus, we are all WIDELY different in reality – the one thing we have in common is our love for RLM and even that isn’t consistent between “us”.

    There is a word “neotribalism”, that could maybe be closer to us, but I am afraid that simple “fan” will have to do.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I sexually Identify as a LA̕͏͜M̴̨̀͠B̨͘͟͝͝O̴͟͢͠RGHINI. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of DRIVing UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. People say to me that a person being a LAMBORGHINI is Impossible and I’m MATERIALISTIC but I don’t care, I’m this NEW LAMBORG̡͏͏H̡͢Į͡NI HERE. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 NEW bookshelves and 2000 new books on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “NEW LAMBORGHINI HERE” and respect my right to DRIVE UP HERE IN THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS. If you can’t accept me you’re a LAMBOphobe and need to check your ̡GNA͏WL͞I̛DGE. Thank you, and I’ll see you on my website.

  • Uh, yes, thank you, wifey.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Yes.

  • Are there more of you, though?

  • tOmy`

    Possibly?

    For example, our TV is currently running multi-part documentaries about different subcultures in Czech Republic, so I kinda assume it is still a very real thing. The line might have blurred a bit, but anarchists / homeless people / punks / women still pretty much work as a “subculture” here.

    I guess! Very uneducated opinion on this matter. But I did pass the test, so there is that.

    On the other hand, that test was Forestry,

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Wow: Confirmed for Computer.

  • Like Icare

    Budgetary constraints at the EmPal SuRecon Center.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    There can be…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Hmmmmmm…

  • tOmy`

    Funnily enough, according the wiki link, AA is a subculture!

    SO WE MADE IT! WE ARE SUBCULTURE!

    Is this the time when we start looking for things that oppress us and / or offend us?

  • Palpatine

    Prequel fanboys oppress us.

  • Depends, but all in all yes. We have certain jokes and certain behaiviors.

  • Sully

    That’s the posture DC takes with its [recent] films.
    Winter Soldier got real, sure, but it needed to, and the logic of the film ultimately supported that “realism.”

    Nothing in Man of Steel felt real. Not only were Supes’ powers illogically rooted, but so were basic storytelling decisions. It’s like they (the filmmakers) created a list of scenes they wanted to see, and then shoehorned the story to fit those beats, even if it meant making said story dumb.

  • tOmy`

    That just defines group, not a “culture” tho.

  • Culture within a culture= subculture

  • Sully

    Hey, mustachio! Who you callin’ a cigarette?

  • Palpatine

    I knew you were Tai Lopez!

  • tOmy`

    Not that easy. This isn’t a culture. We have literally nothing in common but the fact that we all have Disqus accounts and like RLM (and as I said below, that “love” also varies drastically between us).

    Sharing same memes / having some inside jokes is just a sign of a community or a group. We would somehow have to identify, share mannerisms and so on.

    And that just won’t work, as basically everyone of us is acting differently, doing different characters and so on and so forth.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Oh I forgot: IGNORANT FUCKS!

  • Sully

    We have our own art, dialect (i.e. manner of speaking), and religion. We qualify.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Thank you for agreeing with me, you diabetic amphibian…

  • Sully

    That’s better. Loud… but better.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    We have slang, terminology, in jokes… Just because you don’t want to be part of the club, don’t be hatin’…

  • Even comlex thing needs a simplification. We mostly share a perspective on things so I don’t agree on mannerisms.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    That’s what they told you to say…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Sorry; Obnoxious American…

  • Sully

    Now you’re just being redundant.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Ordered all the Frank Henlotter for my Universities library… On a similar note; I didn’t realize Tommy Wiseau was in Samurai Cop 2. Did they think that was a good idea?

  • Sully

    Yes. Yes they didn’t.

  • Palpatine

    Is a subculture the same thing as a fanbase?

  • Domo

    We celebrate Christmas as Rich Evans day. We literally praise Rich Evans as our Lord and Savior.
    We celebrate Halloween with the showbiz pizza bear.
    We watch shitty movies together that RLM would probably recommend.
    We’ve made videos dedicated to RLM relationships.

    We totally qualify as a subculture.

  • tOmy`

    Two things:

    1) If we go for a simplification, I guess in a VERY broad term, you could define this as a subculture if; a) there was some culture going on around here; b) if this already didn’t fit criteria for “group” or “fandom”.

    2) Subcultures were widely disregarded when it comes to online world (citation needed). 9GAG is not a subculture. AV Club is not a subculture.

    Now I might be talking out of my ass here, but I think subculture is rather rigid term and the “culture” being kinda the important aspect of it. I am not arguing, mind you, it’s just that I don’t think we even begin to qualify for such term.

    “Community”, “group” or “fandom” should be the correct term. Somebody else can look into the “neotribalism” I mentioned, but I think even that is a long shot.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Like, I love TW: He is inadvertently one of the best directors of all time with his dream logic. Although, he didn’t stick with it and relabeled it, so the whole undercover genius thing doesn’t really fit and he as anything doesn’t fit.

  • Mainly. I go for identification in identity. If I meet someone that likes RLM I’ll more likely talk to him than if he is a Sandler fan I’d leave in the gutter. So now that we have RLM incommon we can always talk about that even though we have nothing in common. Culture 101 for me is interaction and identity.

    But still I also agree to much what Tomy sais.

    Itsnot that easy as he put it. But still we have to deal with solids and not abstracts so we have to argue our points.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I think that’s the distinction that tOmy is trying to define. I think that their are certain criteria that a subculture must meet, admittedly, but to what degree I don’t know. All I know is that, we have more in common than just dank memes, LOLZ, and common interest in RLM…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I’d give you a pet on the back, if you weren’t just a virtual fox…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Thank you for your continued support of RLM.

  • Palpatine

    Yeah, I would say we’re more of a fanbase than a subculture.

  • tOmy`

    Agreed, this would be hard one to crack.

    Especially since the most often used symbol of any subculture is style (mainly music / clothing), political views or something we share (must be a bigger thing than videos, tho).

    And till Donald Trump, we hardly agreed on any of these or shared any of these.

    What we could do is look up some list of subcultures and try to find that is, in its description, as close to us as possible and start from there.

  • Sully

    Who says? Who’s been talkin’ shit again?

  • I agree. But the basis for culture for me is 2 people meet and create culture. Simple yes. Too simplified yes but I think still true.

    Your neotribalism is spot on. But Ive never quite figured out how it fits in with personal identity. So Ive chosen to throw it out I guess.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Those fucking Aussies…

  • I’ll read up more on your points. I like this conversation.

  • tOmy`

    This whole thing begins to reek of some girl asking you “so what subculture are you part of”, so she could see how interesting you are, so you panicked, ran into the restaurant’s bathroom and now messaging us from toilet, hoping at least this one will land.

    Mind you, tho, saying: “I am part of the subculture worshiping an alcoholic who plays a role of a massmurdering sociopath while reviewing sci-fi” never got me laid and I am beginning to suspect my ex didn’t like Plinkett jokes in bed.

  • Palpatine

    You have a good point.

  • Oh man. My brain…… where is my Adam Sandler comedy…. ah much better… Yes I ate a culture for breakfast… yummy.

  • Sully

    Oh, well, their opinions are all upside down anyway, so…

  • Rich Evans is the only absolute in the universe. We have a true north gentlemen!

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    If only that were true and I wasn’t a mid-twenties man child. I think the fat guy with a beard who walks his also fat pit bull gets more action than me…

  • tOmy`

    Subcultures are fun study, to be honest.

    Was always my favorite part of different social / psychology classes I was taking. And, as you might have guessed, I love reading about music subcultures.

  • Oh. You like music? You never told us.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    It’s just some nomenclature he pulled out of the tOmy dictionary (aka; Wikipedia…)

  • tOmy`

    Cheerleaders need to dance to something, silly.

    Or cheer. Or… pyramid… building.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    *googling keg stand/gay jokes*…

  • RLMkeepitup

    Wiseau seemed a bit over the top in Sammy Cop 2 but I did enjoy what scenes he had.

  • Sully

    Be sure to clear your history afterwards.

  • tOmy`

    I do remember that one from school (our teacher was a gamer, so he liked to spice things up with internet stuff) but I admit I had to recheck the word on wiki.

  • Domo

    I honestly think at this point if RLM did a meet-n-greet, they’d have a full on cult to deal with. People would dress up like Plinkett, Fuckbot 5000, Jessi’s bumblebee costume, Space Cop, amongst so many other things. Everyone would have boxes of Totino’s Pizza Rolls to sign. People would probably chant “What’s wrong with your face” and make songs about the whole thing.

    I think you’re looking at this comment section, which is such an infinitesimal section of RLM’s fanbase, and basing a concept of culture on this group of people, which isn’t representative of their fanbase as a whole. Once the regulars leave, we’re a chatboard, and become fans of each other’s company.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Still need to check it out… After TNG of course…

  • Palpatine

    You’re right about this comment section being only a part of the larger RLM fanbase. A sub-fanbase if you will.

  • tOmy`

    I see what you mean. However, that would mean A LOT of similar webmediums are a subculture and I tend not to agree with that.

    Quite honestly, AV Club comment section would be already ahead of us (they have a long list of running jokes and regulars) and 9GAG hosts events.

    As I said, hard to crack. But I am, personally, still leaning towards “fans”. If you try to compare us to let’s say subculture of anarchists / punkers and then compare us to say fans of Batmannews, I think you know which one are we leaning towards.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    No one using this computer but me… and SpaceGhosts…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    A sub-fanbase of a larger fanbase…

  • tOmy`

    Darnit, we are alcoholics anonymous!

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    That was very sweet. You guyz/galz are my broz/homegalz

  • Wolvy

    The scene when Leia pushes past Chewbacca to hug Ren really sucked. Han’s best friend there and she goes around him to hug someone she just met???

  • Palpatine

    Correct-a-mundo!

  • Ok. Fandom. I’ll call it that. I like the sound of it now that you’ve argued your point.

  • Isn’t Ren… her son?

  • Domo

    But I would look at a defining thread of RLM culture to be the type of humor that we share. RLM brings a lot of people who have a love for their dark, twisted humor together. I can’t bring up these jokes at work, or with family or friends, or even on other websites, but they work here, regardless of the content that the humor springs from.

    We may not agree on things like movies or music, but how we approach those differences make us so incredibly different from AV Club and 9gag.

  • We are RedLetterMedia!

  • A sub-fanbase, part of which live in their parents’ sub-basements.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I would describe it as fart

  • Wish I could do that with MY LIFE….

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Finally… Voice of Reason…

  • Palpatine

    I live in an old Soviet submarine that’s frozen in ice in the middle of the Arctic Ocean.

  • Bubs

    Furries are a subculture. We’re a clique.

  • tOmy`

    Okay, that is more than a fair point, so allow me my personal rebuttal:

    1) Dark twisted humor = I have the very same amount of it in real life, so in that regard, I can’t judge.
    2) AV Club is basically this comment section, just much, much bigger. Their humor is not that far from our own, by the way, really depends on which thread you open tho.
    3) 9GAG has its own approach as well, that is juvenile humor and repetition of the same jokes.

    Please, don’t take this the wrong way, but saying “this makes us incredibly different” is exactly what fandoms / group do – they are different and they always tend to view their own approach / style as superior to the others. It is very phenomenon 101 in social interaction between groups of people.

    I am not trying to dismiss the connection we have here, that is the last thing I would try to do, but I am just trying to illustrate that many, many other similar webzones on internet will have the very same feeling / same connection and won’t be defined as a subculture. Again, very rigid term.

  • Soviet hardware still wins the race in the middle east! Even modern american pig struggle… never give up your dream of “galactic peace”.

  • Seth Rogen and some other guy he made the Kim Jong Un mockumentary with are going to make a “Where’s Waldo” movie… I have to ask WHERE ARE THEIR BRAINS?

  • Palpatine

    In the Dumpster next to Bambi’s corpse.

  • Perfect. Wish I could frame that!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    They never had a brain

  • tOmy`

    I knew that eventually I will prove myself wrong by looking into it. God fucking dammit, I hate knowledge:

    “Fandom is a term used to refer to a subculture composed of fans characterized by a feeling of empathy and camaraderie with others who share a common interest. Fans typically are interested in even minor details of the object(s) of their fandom and spend a significant portion of their time and energy involved with their interest, often as a part of a social network.”

    I apologize.

    (Although it is quite complicated, as for example sci-fi subculture is actually considered a fandom and not a subculture.)

    But yea, eat your hearts out!!!!

  • They saw the Tim Burton Pee Wee movie and thought yes we can do Waldo… I guess this is what happened.

  • Palpatine

    They’re just like the Scarecrow.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Seth Rogen used fear toxin on North Korea.

  • tOmy`

    That fascist police fraction from My Chemical Romance’s wasteland distopia of Killjoys?

    Most likely.

  • да. это.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    The Interview was so good bro. Do you hate fun? I like to get chocolate wasted! FoRk In The Brain! Pot jokes bro! LOVE EM! I SMOKE POT WITH MY DICK! WHO DOESN’T LOVE SODOMY AM I RIGHT? ! XAXAXAHAHAH THIS MOVIE IS GONNNA BE So gOOd Bro! IMMA WATCH IT HIGH WHILE JERKING OFF! XAAHAHAAHAHAAHAH

  • Palpatine

    Someone turn that into a movie ASAP!

  • I usually watch porn while jerking off but… whatever gets you off.

  • tOmy`

    They already have:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTgnDLWeeaM

    #BringBackMCR

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Seth Rogen’s funny bro, what do you know? *poorly drinks beer*

  • RLMkeepitup

    Waldo probably has some complicated back story with lots of twists and turns that leave his life basically unpredictable.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    SeTH rOGEN geTs mE off BRO! Dicks and wEEd-twO greAtest subjECts of comedY rite? XAHAHAAHAH IMMA LIGHT UP A JOINT RIGHT NOW FAM! WITH MY DICK! THANKS SETH ROGEN! YOU MAKE ME LYFE BRIGHTER!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I believe MCR is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way’s favorite band.

  • Palpatine

    *Kim Jong-Un

  • tOmy`

    It won’t ever beat Pineapple Express. Nobody can.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Seth Rogen said in an interview “Well I was pretty damn good in Steve Jobs but I don’t want to do that again so let’s make Where’s Waldo starring me!”

  • Hey you just changed my mind on it! What should I think?

    I changed my mind to better be able to tell a difference between groups on the Internet. And I realized that other people who have lives and don’t surf the internets 4chans and AV sites lump all of iternetculture to a big pile of subculture. Who has final athority? So I had to throw out my logic about identity and interaction. A culture within a culture within a culture culture with different varieties within a culture… when does it end? Damnit! I feel like a ghost in a shell!

    I’m sticking with fandom for now!

  • Domo

    Hmm. Then I don’t understand if you’re referring to this webzone’s comment section or RLM’s entire community. I guess the discussion has co-mingled at this point.

    “This is what makes us different” is what cultures do also, because the differences in mannerisms define the culture. We’re incredibly protective of our community here, so that when people say “This comment section sucks, I’m out.” we happily bid them farewell. That’s not something we do as RLM fans. That’s something we do as a community. Which, to me, leans more to culture than fandom.

  • He’s not even slim enough to be Bluto from Popeye and he wants to play Waldo?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    cyka blyat!

    #thanks DOTA 2!

  • tOmy`

    I had to Google it, so lemme ask this:

    What in the name of a fuck am I reading?

  • A depressed psycho serial killer that they have to……..find. Id watch that. Make it rapy and make it very “Bronson” and I’ll empty my wallet.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • AKA Mr. Wint

    My dick is Kosher, it only eats things touched by a rabbi… oh wait…

  • Domo

    They’re going to show where Waldo is in the trailer, thus refuting the need to see the movie.

    Thanks, Rogen!

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Wait thats not a joke?! Fuck StupidHeros.

  • tOmy`

    If you scroll up a bit, you will see than you are more than right and I am more than only slightly wrong.

    Just… slightly.

  • Domo

    I wuv you, you crazy bastard.

    Just… slighty 😀

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I love it personally. Better than what Sony could ever do. http://i3.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/090/488/a59.png

  • Palpatine

    I kinda like it.

  • Wolvy

    Sorry I meant Rey. Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?

  • Superior Omni Man

    Teenage Negro Ninja Thrashers

  • You lost but won our hearts.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Oooooo, Marvel Trademark A-Hole….

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Instant Classic; beats smoking a cigarette in the rain, puking your guts out at a frat party, watching Feeding Frenzy…

  • Sully

    It’s about as close as you can get to the classic Spider-Man. It’s my new personal fave in regards to the cinematic versions of Spidey.

    http://i.imgur.com/kbCHQTM.jpg

  • It looks alright… but I do hope he just happened to catch it… and won’t be using it all the time.

  • YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH! FEEDING FRENZY WAS BETTERER THAN SPACE COP!

  • dollar store cashier wife
  • Sully

    Don’t believe everything your mind tells you.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I’ve got you for three minutes! Three minutes of play time!

  • Sully

    Me, too. Your life I mean. My life is dope.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    YOUR WORST HANGOVER WAS BETTER THEN SPACE COP!

  • Domo

    That outfit didn’t show off Tobey Maguire’s sexy thighs, so therefore you’re wrong.

  • One more point that crossed my mind. I don’t identify myself as a RLMer but I love RLM. Being a fan of a commercial entertainment group is subculture. Wow, the irony. I’ve given this to much attention… oh a beer bottle I wonder whats in it… beer! Oh.. good. What was what…?

  • Sully

    Trust me. Someone else is using your computer. Trust me.
    And you should be a-fuckin’-shamed.

    http://orig03.deviantart.net/7ca8/f/2011/266/0/f/wink_by_silvixen-d4aqqv3.gif

  • It’s possible she knows who Rey is. There’s been lots of speculation that she’s Luke’s daughter, hasn’t there?

  • …..oh……… foxes and toads……… different lives…. we have….
    ………Im happy………………. for you…………………………………….
    …………………………………………………………………………………….
    …………………………………………………………………………………….

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I can’t argue with you when I agree with you and you’re right.

    Dammit!

    However, I will just point this out…One of these films is about an invincible alien “god” from another planet, and the other is a film about political corruption that just happens to feature a dude addicted to some nonsense serum. We’re not really comparing apples to apples here.

    You say Superman’s powers are “illogically rooted.” Basically, they turned his powers into midichlorians. So, the actual fair comparison is MAN OF STEEL to PHANTOM MENACE, in which case, though it doesn’t suddenly become a good movie, it improves in the relation.

  • Dios Mio. He took Captain Americas burrito…. I like… It’s like the american dream is over. Jejeje cabron!

  • Sully
  • If that’s the Hispanic Spidey they probably told him he had to work for Iron Man because otherwise they’d deport his ass (no matter if he was born in the US).

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s also completely largely CGI. I’ll reserve judgement until I see the actor in the costume.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Preach!

  • This Civil War thing is all wrong. Cap is supposed to be the Boyscout while Iron man is supposed to be the bad boy. This is especially weird and out of character when you take into account how Tony hated being involved with Shield.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Iron Man is in this movie. Therefore…Who gives a fyuck? I am sick of Robert Downey Jr. and Iron Man.

  • Sully

    I don’t mean the source of his powers as much as the inconsistent source of his powers. In MoS Earth’s yellow sun gives him superhuman abilities, UNLESS he’s in the presence of Kryptonian atmosphere. Then his powers diminish. In the vacuum of space though? Yeah, you guessed it. Powers come back. What in the actual fuck?

    As far as I can tell, once Marvel establishes some rules, they pretty much stick to them, though Cap did seem a little stronger in AoU than usual. That motorbike toss?

  • “We will oppress the Indian and the Mexican. It is the American dream”

    Taft you f***!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Drop your panties, Sir William. I cannot wait til lunch time.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Oh, hai samurai.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    nailed it.

    We all have nothing in common but our Ishtar meme.

  • Consumer based meme, how de’lish. I will rub it on my scrotum! And you will watch…. in delight.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I don’t know about you guys but I prefer stupid looking, unrealistic, shitty looking, fake looking, and made to sell action figure costumes. http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/amazingspiderman/images/b/b4/The_Amazing_Spider-Man_fourth_poster.png/revision/latest?cb=20120501072021

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I see why Trump wants that wall

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    We are omitted.

  • RLMkeepitup

    that rounded jawline.. slightly less recognizable that batmans new cleavage chin

  • tOmy`

    I basically switched from IRC to RLM.

    After spending more than a decade on UT IRC channels, talking random bullcrap for years, it is sort of a quirk to use internet comment sections / text-based outlets for spamming and sharing links / thoughts / jokes. Hence my constant presence here, it is something I am used to and, quite possibly, cannot function without it (as long as I am on internet).

    It is no coincidence that when our scene kinda died and lot of players moved on, I stopped going to IRC and within couple of days finally started commenting here.

    That is why I maybe view this tiny bit differently. It is still “new” to me.

  • SILVERLINES AND BATNIPPLES. We’ve been through this! That’s how you make a toyline!

  • Racist, homofob, thumbsdowner.

    UNSUBSCRIBE!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Every kid just wants Batman in his normal black and/or grey color. No kid wants neon armor Batman.

  • Sully

    Close, but you missed the bullseye.

    http://i.imgur.com/XoXIs9m.jpg

  • SPOILERS! They failed making him funny.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Sully

    I’m assuming the film logic factors in Tony’s regrets about Ultron from the previous film, as well as Cap’s undying desire to do good, especially in the wake of the collapse of S.H.I.E.L.D. after the events of Winter Soldier.

    Makes sense to me.

  • tOmy`

    Well, since the tangent party apparently started and my reviews are due to first thing tomorrow, let me entertain dscw, GrumPa and everyone else who feels like going on a murderspree tonight:

    http://www.mixmag.net/read/edmtv-is-here-and-its-definitely-as-bad-as-you-think-it-is-news/

    And you thought Tidal was a bad idea. (Yet again including names of people I respect, as a bonus blow).

    I am off to watch episode of Vinyl to even out. Either see you later or tomorrow. xo

  • Different opinions are great. I found angles that don’t work with my reasoning cus you argued.

  • Domo

    How is your colon doing? I’m sad you didn’t get an Ishtar scar to show your love for Warren Beatty.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Grant Morrison, however, wants a Batman in every color of crayon.

  • Sully
  • Wizard Phoenix

    Not even Zack Snyder would do that.

  • But the chinese kids have the orders already… oh well. We can sacrifice a province or two. It’s china. It floats the global market. Modern day slaver…….

  • Sully

    That’s because Zack Snyder didn’t come equipped with balls. His parents got the economy package (pun intended).

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s the ending of Bivvisdodge.

  • Sully

    YAAAASSSSS!!!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    No the ending is Sam Jackson showing up.

  • Sully

    It’s gonna be great.

  • tOmy`

    I think IM3, WS and AoU kinda tie it all together:

    Tony knows that Avengers are bad idea and Ultron project was the way to effectively disband them before something bad happens. And than it happened. In order to get people who are responsible, I assume they will be after Cap’s boyfriend and Cap won’t let it slide.

    I still hope we will get to see more reasoning and logic behind the idea of Avengers being bad for society, AI system guarding the world etc., because that was the moment when AoU really peaked my interest… you know, for them 5 minutes between punching.

    But something tells me they will go the punching way again. But for once, I would hope for 2 hours of drama and some philosophy and one hour of Spider-Man stealing shields.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Good Lawd, you just described Bivvisdodge but with third-rate characters in place of the icons.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Tidal is Jay Z and friends masturbating to themselves.

  • tOmy`

    Hey, I am not in it for the third-rate characters. I am in it for the Marvel(ous) product and hope that at some point, they will embrace the interesting and partially ditch the explody.

  • Sully
  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Yeah, sure. “Dream On” ain’t just a river in Egypt.

    Wait. What?

  • Sully

    To be fair, I only masturbate to Jay Z’s friends, too.

  • dollar store cashier wife
  • Make America Grated Cheese

    And Kanye saying “Imma let you finish” a lot.

  • Tidal is awesome. I bought two. What a hit…

  • What is this………… excellent…………

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Make America Grated Cheese

    In THAT order.

  • tOmy`

    I am pretty sure this will get to their BabeMethod segment.

    Can we please pay attention to the words BabeMethod? I mean… fuck, BabeMethod. It’s so radical it doesn’t even have a space in between the words.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    That CG looked a little faky-fake…

  • Sully

    I know Crossbones factors in (see link). His former association with both S.H.I.E.L.D. and Hydra likely doesn’t sit well with the politicians of the world as far as trusting superheroes goes. And then you’ve got wild cards like Thor, Hulk, and Bucky which only exacerbate things. My guess is there will be some exposition which will sound something like “Tensions are high right now, you two (Banner & Thor). Best if you two keep a low profile for now.”
    This could explain why Banner is with Thor in Ragnarok.

    http://screencrush.com/442/files/2015/05/captain-america-crossbones-fight-pic.jpg?w=720&cdnnode=1

    Bucky’s role, and the manhunt that’s going on in this film to bring him to justice, is another big piece of the puzzle as far as Cap’s reasoning goes. It’s a question of, is it fair to hold accountable a terrorist that was under mind control during the time of his terrorizing? It’s an interesting debate, especially when said terrorist is the best friend of America’s golden boy.

    I dunno. I just like the dynamic in this film so much more than BvS. It feels more organic.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Only American’s use the term EDM; tailored, specifically for their needs.

  • tOmy`

    Absolutely agree on the BvS comparison, especially since Marvel had much more time to set up all the players and gave all the important ones some time to reflect on themselves (while not punching dudes).

    My bet about Ragnarok is that Hulk and Thor will finally see that Thranos is after infinity gems (quite possibly will find another infinity gem) to do the whole Marvel “but now we have to be all friends again, because somebody really bad is coming” schtick that will finally boil into Infinity War.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Captian Pants: Civil War looks like a bunch of pissy teens having a spaz. They even meet in the abandoned factory and just run at each other screaming.
    Stark: “You’re a dick Cap.”
    Captian Pants: “No you is the one who is dick.”
    Stark: “Fine behind the Gym after school.”
    Cap: “Its on.”
    Stark “Yeah its on, i’m going to make you cry.”
    Other avengers: *Chanting “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!…”

  • tOmy`

    I kinda like how most of the really great European DJs are someone you have never heard about before until you accidentally see them and / or hear them and they blow your mind.

  • Palpatine

    What’s EDM?

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Its a creepy form of bondage.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I discover new music all the time…

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • I had no idea. I’m not trying to put you guys down or anything like I usually do. I had no idea there was an internal logic in the movies. And that everything had consequences. Honestly I’ve not payedcattention.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Yup.

  • Sully

    I can’t take you seriously if you’re going to dress like that.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Eternal Damnation Music

  • tOmy`

    When it comes to electronic music, it is a freaking gold mine out there, with all the different styles, genres and even forms of production.

    It’s mindblowing and, unfortunately, frustrating to grasp. I sometimes listen to my friends who DJ / produce and it is just pantsshitingly scary how much they know about the scene and how complicated and complex the scene is.

    But then I just sorta luck out sometimes and someone drags me by my pom-poms to see random gig and it is awesome. And, usually, on my question: “How did I not hear about this guy / girl before”, the answer is something like: “Yea, well, he is from this French techno underground.” “Oh. I see.”

  • Sully

    Wouldn’t it be great if they still fucking hated each other, but only fight side-by-side for the sake of Earth, the whole time shooting jabs at one another like, “Eat me, Ant fucker” and “Go fuck your old ass dead girl friend, Cap’n.”

  • Sully

    Erectile Dick Malfunction.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I listen to a little bit of everything but I mainly listen to Ambient/Ambient Techno/Acid Techno/ Hard Techno. There’s so much of it to listen to. Lots of good stuff from the 90s; oddly enough.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    You haven’t been around but it was for my deadpool fan movie.

    https://plus.google.com/u/0/114089192088360284355/posts/HKw4NAF2Wbb?pid=6253635624090800130&oid=114089192088360284355

    I’ve been making stupid movies a lot lately.

  • tOmy`

    This is quite frankly the only reason why I care. As someone who is not a big fan of comic, this “complex” plotline, the guessing of the endgame, the alliances and so on are basically the only thing making me watch these movies.

    I am basically riding along with it because I am interested in the masterplan of MCU, how long will it work and, simply, because it has never been done before (if I am not mistaken).

  • tOmy`

    It definitely would.

  • Sully

    Rad. I feel gayer already.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    What did you expect? Fucking meditative peace that ends with flash forwards to all of them dying of terminal illnesses/old age?
    Captain Babyboomer: Civil Preservation?

  • MCU?

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Here is the full list.
    The rules are, One fixed camera. In one take and do something stupid.
    https://disqus.com/home/channel/apscorp/discussion/channel-apscorp/just_putting_all_the_vids_in_one_place/

  • AKA Mr. Wint
  • tOmy`

    There is so much to listen to in general.

    That is why I devised my little RLM music review game, just to try to see if I can keep up at least with the major releases, interesting and talked about albums, and bands I know.

    As of now, I already have around 2 – 3 weeks backlog and despite being jokingly asked “who?” almost everytime, the funny thing is that I can barely scrape the surface of known bands.

    The sheer amount of music is just incredible.

  • Bubs

    Read the whole thing. Didn’t see a description of what “EDM” is. I guess I’m just supposed to know via osmosis, but I live in a vacuum. That, or I’m not cool enough. Either way, the rest of the world can take two of these ..|.. and call me in the morning.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Its hot and humid… I’m getting off my arse and making you a movie, Mr Wint.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I haven’t seen BvS yet so I can’t really compare the two. Based on what I have seen they do both feel organic in terms of story progression but Civil War is doing it much better because there are more films to develop the characters to this point. I do like the idea in BvS that it’s enemies that become friends but to be honest I prefer an emotion punch like two great friends becoming enemies.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Which one are you?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Why does Thor need movies? The first one is forgettable and the second one sucks.

  • Bubs

    Because, just as the WWF learned many years ago, sexy men in ridiculous costumes beating each other up = money.

  • Sully

    The latter is more emotionally powerful, I agree. DC’s need to rush into their “avengers” film is killing the whole vibe for me. Take a breath, guys. Let your characters grow, become established in their own right. I can understand their reluctancy to give someone like Aquaman his own film without introducing him in a bigger film first, but Dawn of Justice after Man of Steel feels too quick to me. They could’ve done a Wonder Woman and/or Flash film first.

  • Sully

    I didn’t mind either. I kinda like the throwback style of the first film, and the second one had its moments.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Thanks Pal.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Mike, with the charm of Rich.

  • Domo

    I’ve noticed in women’s mags that Gal Gadot is making the rounds, but she’s heavily promoting Wonder Woman, and not BVS, at least from what I’ve read so far.

    Which feels weird, either because WW the character is not terribly important to BVS, or they’re scared shitless that WW the movie needs all the help it can get.

    Which makes me feel bad, slightly, for Gal Gadot, if she’s going to spend multiple years promoting a film that hasn’t even finished production yet.

  • Like Icare

    What are you? Sexist? Check your privilege.

  • tOmy`

    Electronic Dance Music (a term referring to a shitload of popular, mostly crap genres, 99% of them being so radio-friendly that it makes angels weep).

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Do you have any recommendations?

  • Sully

    It’s a long haul to be sure. I wouldn’t want to be shackled to a project that could monopolize your best years without much to show for it. I guess money’s worth a little more than legacy these days.

  • Palpatine

    Do they play that music in strip clubs?

  • Like Icare

    Don’t look now… but that “complex” plotline… is all filler which will be resolved in a very much definite number of upcoming flicks – just in time for the grand finale about something-something space-jamgem glove.
    And then they punch the chin guy in the chin.

  • Domo

    i take umbrage with your comment. I want a free shrug now.

  • Like Icare

    I think you meant dirham.

  • tOmy`

    Nope, strip clubs usually have standards due to the fact that dancers chose their own soundtrack (at least here).

    It’s mostly club music / radio music / MTV music.

  • Like Icare

    #NotSpidey’sShield?

  • Palpatine

    Oh God!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    We’ll all wait and see what happens, which is what WB needs. At least they’re confident in their properties unlike Sony was with Spider-Man.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Remember when Sony was planning a Spider-Man Cinematic Universe? It was the greatest practical joke in human history.

  • Like Icare

    …cause suicide is painless… it brings on many changes…

    #M.A.S.H.U.P.

  • Like Icare

    Hopefully there’s a stroke or a heart attack waiting for him around the corner.

  • tOmy`

    When it comes to electro, I heard Digitalism’s Mirage recently. It is kinda by the book, but varied enough not to get too boring.

    Generally haven’t listen to too much electronic music lately (at least not new releases) so here is something of the top off my head:

    I did enjoy seeing Danger live last summer.
    I also spent a lot of time listening to this for some reason: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U04zWe_VZJE

    But it’s like 4AM and I spent half a day listening to Nicki Minaj, so my brain is on fritz as of now.

  • Palpatine

    They were?

  • Like Icare
  • Wizard Phoenix

    Yes. After Amazing Clusterfuck 2 there was going to be a Sinister Six film which one just be another Spider-Man “film.” Then a Venom stand alone movie and even an Aunt May solo film in which it will focus on her time as a secret agent.

  • Domo

    That’s so sweet! Thank you, I guess.

  • Like Icare

    I thought Aunt May was the Silver Streaker?

  • Palpatine

    You know, say what you will about the Raimi trilogy, at least it embraced the comics, and didn’t take itself too seriously. And Gwen Stacy was played by Bryce Dallas Howard, so there’s that.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Teaser Trailer? Hmm … the teaser for The Force Awakens came out November 28th, 2014, almost 13 months before the film was released.

    THIS MEANS WE WON’T SEE A PLINKETT REVIEW FOR THE FORCE AWAKENS UNTIL APRIL 2017!

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    #Water

  • Palpatine

    It’s like poetry, it rhymes.

  • Domo

    I think Rich Evans and Mike Stoklasa will come out with competing autobiographies, both titled “I am Plinkett.” The subsequent sequels will be “I am not Plinkett.”

    All before the TFA Plinkett review is released.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    #ScienceIsALie
    #TheEarthIs6YearsOld

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    VIII will be rated XXX and Luke will fuck Rey with help from The Force.

    That’s not a rape joke, it’s an erectile disfunction joke. The Force can now be condensed into small blue pills.
    “That’s not how The Force works!” Han Solo, RIP

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Teaser for SpaceCop came out in like 2008; do the math…

  • Domo

    Disney makes pornos for children. The great Mike Stoklasa said so.

  • A Pg-13 friendly rape movie. JJ could fix that. He can fix anything.

  • Palpatine

    That makes Luke a redneck!

  • junkevil

    upvoted for Nimoy reference.

  • $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
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    $$$$$$$$,1OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO7,$$$$$$$
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  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    *Splooges all over old TV*

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Mike and Rick Evans gained weight, Jay got ripped …

    What will things be like in 2024?!

  • Rich Evans Anthology II

  • Domo

    Dammit, Taco! You got a hole in your TV.

    Time to insert a tablet into your TV, watch Plinkett, then splooge all over your tablet.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I BLASTED A HOLE IN MY TV SCREEN! OH FFFFUUUCCCKKK!!!!!

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Wow. That took some time.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    It’s been done every year-or-so for the past 70 years. It’s called comic books. The only thing they’ve master-planned is turning one art form (film) into a little bit different form (semi-serialized film). As masterplans go, it’s only impressive, in my view, as a gimmick and as a marketing tool. And, I’m not really impressed by those things. It’s not like they’ve got a huge, intricate plot that’s going to end up somewhere with a revelation that was only hinted at decades before. It’s not a puzzle. It’s more like endless cameo-ing and delayed pay-offing. And, it’s getting to the point now where they’re not even bothering with their set-ups; they’re just throwing things you might recognize around.

  • So Ridley is at it again with a new police noir love drama starring an old replicant who by logic should have been dead for years, ew. It’s seriously not ribbed for my pleasure. It’s like a weekend with Bill Cosby. Ow my but is sore from all the sitting in the theater waiting for this new masterpiece to reach my irking eyes. We’ve only had two seriously good movies since 1982, Suburban Commando and WrestleMania IX. Who knew comicbook movies, Batman and non-Batman movies were obsolete by 2018 and would be perfect landfill to build a bridge for all the refugees to reach safety. Thanks Hollywood you did the right thing. *slide whistle* Did you know that 12 years is nothing in comparison of 37-38 years? A masterpiece takes this long to make. Anyway REDLETTERMEDIA SUBCULTURE INC I just wanted to tell you how happy I am to see cancer infest yet another good piece of cinema.

    Replicant? More like Replidont!

    Anyway back to looking for japs where they don’t belong.

  • Took 30 secs to steal it from some lame internet looser.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Then you’d just slag on them for imitating Marvel’s “masterplan.”

    You don’t need to introduce DC characters. They’re the icons. Besides Spider-Man, every little boy grows up pretending to be Batman or Superman. Every little girl…Wonder Woman.

    Ant-Man? Not so fyucking much.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Sarcasm is hard to read on the internet.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Way to go, then.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Why is no one talking about this video? Everybody here is just circle-jerking their streams of consciousness. At least on YouTube, when I get bored with the discussions of superheroes, I can go watch the virals of a real superhero. Pewdiepoo! I may just never come back here until tomorrow.

  • Bubs

    Can I follow you on twitter, fuck you on fistbook, and peg you on flickr?

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I’m instagarmming a Grindr sandwich right now, as a matter of fact, with a tumbler of diet soda.

  • Palpatine

    What video?

  • Bubs

    Bubs likes this.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    Then retwit it or something.

  • RLMkeepitup

    the work shed, beat up speeder, wants power inverters. there’s probly a big beer belly below that robe now.

  • Harry Butters

    I finally took my anti deplinkett

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    I don’t know what you’re saying, but I fyucking lost my sh!t at “Replicant? More like Replidont!”

    Good work.

  • Make America Grated Cheese

    That’s gonna leave a stain.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    iSplooge, new from Apple.

  • GodSentUs

    Plinkett… please destroy the prequel apologists. We need you.

  • Palpatine
  • Palpatine

    He’ll destroy them and the Ring Theory. Ew.

  • GodSentUs

    I hope he sends an entire legend of his BHEWST twoops.

  • Palpatine

    Oh, I’m afraid the Plinkett review will be quite operational when the Prequel fanboys arrive:
    http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130417044353/starwars/images/e/e8/PalpatineTauntingLuke.png

  • GodSentUs

    *stares at chair*
    *stares back at space combat I can’t possibly make out from this distance*

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Having been an Iron Man nerd for years, it makes sense.

    This is a character who was briefly the Secretary of Defense, after all. He’s also a very hands-on businessman with years of government dealings under his belt.

    I know movie Tony Stark and comic book Tony Stark are different, but from what I’ve seen in the trailers, it seems that they’ll show how the events of past films have changed him.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Sorry I failed. The terminals on the Air Ram quick release are totally fucked. so my first idea is fucked too.
    I’ll have to think of something else.
    Or you can make a request.

  • Plinkett, the revolutionary. Plinkett, the intellectual. Bring order to my life, Plinkett! I can’t take care of myself. *slits wrists*

  • I don’t get it.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Its the GunganGungasGoongars… Fuck it. Its his language.

  • The suit is fine and looks as if a 3d modelling class high school student made it.

  • Ow! My groin!

  • Down, not across.

  • “The Jedi cut them down like they’re butter.”

  • Nass, you are truly a slam poet.

  • Thanks, mister. Boy, howdy, this suicide help line sure is the best thing ever.

  • *garbage cans

  • WrongWithYourFace

    *converters

  • Commander X

    Nothing screams excitement like people getting ready to fight on a stretch of concrete.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    They’ll be dead from alcohol poisoning. Except Rick Evans. He’ll just have a few pounds more.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Aside from the high-tech eye thingies.

  • Domo

    Playing this Palm Sunday at churches worldwide!

    Includes such hits as:

    Hosanna, my groin, Hosanna!
    I Lift My Groin!
    and last, but not least: Sing to the Groin!

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    *The Jedi cut them up and ate them with garlic butter.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    It was like ‘west side story.’ but even more boringer.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    You stole that joke off me… after I stole it from Rich Evans..
    And I know you know that because you posted it to me!

  • Mmmmm, you’re giving me ideas. You think a Gungan would taste good as Sushi?

  • Red Skeleton

    You have the voice of an angel, like that gay santa claus guy

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    OMG! TRIGGER WARNING!
    I’m having Catholic school flashbacks! dried palm fronds stapled to the wall! Nativity Plays!! PANCAKES!!!
    I LOVE YOU PANCAKES!

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Ask the french. They eat frogs.

  • Apparently the Japanese do, too. Thanks, Google.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    If I had the kind of money Donald Rumpf has, I would buy a copy of every first edition of the major comics…
    Invite fans to come to a public viewing… then lock the doors and burn the place down with the comics still inside.
    Fuck comics and their fans.

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    Dont mention the japs and frogs! Secret Nass will explode!

  • That’s probably a present from Tony Stark.

  • So, from playboy death salesman to plain old republican. Gotcha.

  • Jingle balls, jingle balls, jingle all the way. Oh what fun it is to make of one man’s aching groin!

  • Is this like… a sex thing?

  • Doctor Andre Son of Thomas.

    No, but it was a catholic school so I get why you would think that.
    Pancake Tuesday. its a thing.

  • Commander X

    Speaking of “rings”, I might just have to watch this movie, even if it is going to be stupid (if?)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=McJCevmQy6A

    The trailer for Sadako vs. Kayako, the vengeful spirits of the “Ring” and “Ju-on/The Grudge” franchises supposedly facing off

  • Bubs

    Japanese Freddie Vs. Jason.

  • The batturu of the century!

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    Hey, what’s that movie where normal citizens are dressed as superman, like everybody is Superman. Not the Monty Python skit.

    Ok, maybe I just imagined it….where’s my brain medicine?

  • Bubs

    Superman 2: The Wrath of Khan Part 1: An Unexpected Journey.

  • Paulus Decimus Meridius

    I thought it was Planet of the apes 2 , Monkey Strikes Back. Thank you very much, you knowledgeable man/gina.

  • Bubs

    You’re confusing it with Jerry Monkeyguire: Show Me the Monkey. An easy mistake to make.

  • Red Skeleton

    You know, I always thought the character NORG from Final Fantasy 8 looked a little bit like Boss Nass from that one movie
    http://finalfantasy.wikia.com/wiki/NORG?file=NORG_FFVIII_Art.jpg

    He even kind of does a “furble-furble-blrble” lip thing before he starts talking (at least, I think that’s what he’s supposed to be doing, there was no voice over for the game).

    But I checked the dates and found out FF8 came out months before The Pantaloon Mess, so that’s out.

    Too bad, it would have been (at least) the second character in a final fantasy game to be based on Brian Blessed.

    Heideggar, FF7:
    https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/2c/11/84/2c11846581e1ba936f4f27d16604b284.jpg

    I don’t think the distinction translated very well to the game though:
    http://ff7.fr/screen/special/pnj/Heidegger.png

  • Red Skeleton

    Like everybody has the same superpower AND dresses up like a superhero? What would be the point….?

    There was an episode of Darkwing Duck where a planet of Supermen needed an “ordinary person” to live there so they could all take turns saving him.

  • tOmy`

    S for Superman?

  • tOmy`

    Marvel Cinematic Universe

  • Red Skeleton

    Speaking of Brian Blessed, according to the man himself, this was his favorite role:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bu2MXqlDcEs

  • playdude92 .

    Not sure if Plinkett works without scorn. It´ll be like “Yeah, it was good. Let´s try and get laid.”

    Also; If Plinkett didn´t know about this movie, then who made the Trailer reviews? Plot holes!

  • Well. Back to gaming. Anyone played the Division? Is it any good?

  • Red Skeleton

    Division: The Game is about as fun as REGULAR division.

  • So no fun? Or not worth a buy. It’s 60Euros and I kindof like my mantoys to be around 35-40

  • Red Skeleton

    I’m sorry, I’m just being a wiseass. I have no idea. Based on the fact the trailer shows no gameplay I can only assume it’s all style over substance.

  • tOmy`

    Except that line glitch (hilariously broken), it seems to be just sadly broken.

  • You *bleep* *bleep* *bleep* and*bleep* *bleep* there*bleep* !

  • Line glith?

  • tOmy`

    Basically, all the characters in the game don’t clip through each other. So when everyone started playing on a date of release, an actual line had to form in front of one laptop where you get the first mission, as you have to approach it one by one.

    Reports suggest that the queue could take up to 3 hours.

    Plus, servers crash, but that is to be expected.

  • Normal release online crap happening. I wanted this game because it’s something new. Oh ehm “new”. But very turned down by the rpg things flasing on the screen plus that many people describe it as a grinding game. The reviews seem to be split in the middle.