The Gate – re:View

October 13, 2016116 Comments

Happy Halloween! Jay and Josh discuss the often overlooked 80s metal/demon/children’s film The Gate, starring Tiny Stephen Dorff and a bunch of guys in rubber monster suits.


Filed in: re:View

  • Cool!

  • Black Santa

    1st

    edit: 2nd. Damn you Brockston!

  • Black Santa

    We’re here for Mike Stoklasa and the other guy, not the other guy and the other other guy.

  • yonderTheGreat

    Super-spiffy!

  • Return of the Jawsdi

    wait, you’re not my mom, you’re the scariest puppy i ever seen

  • yonderTheGreat

    Is the other other guy replacing the other guy?! Is the Rich Evans replacing the other guy?!

  • yonderTheGreat

    I can’t wait til they Re:View Dorff’s “Sex Guaranteed”!

  • yonderTheGreat

    You so sexy. Oh so sexy! Me love Black Santa long time.

  • alvinfox

    Dead puppies aren’t much fun.

  • M A S K E D P U M K I N

    Alex Jones brought me here.

  • Joe Freeze

    Ishtar had a slightly higher opening weekend and overall domestic gross than The Gate.

  • Kelsie

    I think the biggest thing that would cause it to not hold up, for a modern viewer who ISN’T a huge horror / practical special effects fan (which I am), would just be some of the effects taking you out of it. They can turn the atmosphere from creepy to goofy and kill the mood, if you aren’t the type to appreciate them.

  • M A S K E D P U M K I N

    He’s somewhere fagging off.

  • tOmy`

    Everytime I see Josh, I put on my fanciest pom poms.

  • tOmy`

    Brockston was cooler before you were first.

  • M A S K E D P U M K I N

    Fagging off is a’OK.

  • Ishtar Plinkett review?

  • Chomiq

    Great job guys. I guess this was shot on the same night that Pre Rec stream aired.

  • Admiral_Softy

    I’ve had recurring nightmares throughout my life about being trapped in misty houses with little minions, and of course eyeball hands. Only recently did I bother investigating and found out it was all directly from The Gate. Must have seen it as a tiny toddler and been scarred, but I forgot watching it altogether. Still don’t want to rewatch it because I prefer the horrific version in my mind to the inevitably less frightening original. At least I no longer have to rack my brain searching for why my subconscious is obsessed with that damn all seeing palm eye.

  • TDPfromOz

    You should check out the Gate II. Pretty much the same as the first one, except the kids in it are older. Oh and the little minions have the ability to grant wishes. Which later turn to shit.

  • RLMkeepitup

    i appreciate finding older less known scary flicks. there’s something interesting about them. i saw they’re starting to reshow classic horror movies in theaters seasonally

  • UnhealthyNutter

    We have Brown Sauce here in the uk(it is British after all. My fav brand is Daddies brown sauce). I love it on a bacon butty, Mmm yum!. Its delish on cold cuts of meat too or cheese on toast.

  • Skewed_View

    This is one of those movies that I really loved as a kid, mostly because I liked monsters and stop motion animation.
    I couldn’t have been older than eight when I first saw this movie, and my sister would have been five or six, but I remember us watching this several times when it happened to come on HBO.

  • tOmy`

    I really hope Max Landis shows up for the Halloween BotW dressed up in normal clothes.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I used to jump from the switch to the bed to avoid the hands too.

    Nice to know I wasn’t alone.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    “Normal clothes” being semi-ironic hipster t-shirts and jeans?

    We need a new normal.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    Good story, bro.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    Your name is apt.

  • William Lee Twitch

    You just had to bring up Ishtar again.

  • frankelee

    Happy Halloween? See you guys back here again November 20th.

  • EJ

    Ishtar is not actually as bad as its reputation. It got so much bad press before it came out because the production was such an over-budget trainwreck that it overshadowed any appreciation of the movie. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not one for the ages, but it has its moments.

  • EJ

    Spoiler Alert! Brown sauce is just ketchup with the ingredients in slightly different proportions.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Hooopa hoopa hoopa ONLY YOUuUUUUUuUUUU!

  • Dos Santos

    Since nobodies mentioned Gate 2 from 1990 and how bad it was……..there you go mentioned.

  • Skewed_View

    Thanks for taking the time to read it!

  • Variant

    I can comment that I as an adult watched this movie for the first time after they mentioned it in their Krampus review (if that was last year I was 25ish) and it was effective for me. What Jay said is exactly right, it reminded me of things that scared me as a kid. Good stuff.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    No. Josh doesn’t think you’re hip enough to appreciate it.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    It will last fifteen seconds.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    So you’re not just a boring anecdote person, you’re a gotta-have-the-last-word-even-if-it’s-retarded person, too. Glad you’re not a relative.

  • bhlaab

    The kid in this movie looks like I imagine Rich Evans looked like as a child

  • EJ

    I want them to do a Re:View of Waterworld, which is another movie that got justifiably mocked for spending like $9 billion to make basically “The Road Warrior, At Sea!” But if you ignore all that (and unless you were an investor, you should) and just take it for what it is, it’s a lot of fun, especially once Dennis Hopper shows up. “THAT made a hole!”

  • EJ

    What is it you do here exactly?

  • RiverDevil

    Jay’s smirk at 20:34

  • Daniel Bakke

    Should have ended the episode after the Ishtar trailer and not cut back to Jay & Josh.

  • pvyuki

    here are my complaints: stop making boring videos and grow your hair out, jay!

  • playdude92 .

    The Kid being blown away from the house like a puppet had me laughing hard. More cartoonishly gruesome violence in our movies!

  • Danger Mountain

    I say re:View Nobuhiko Obayashi’s HOUSE next! Also, does re:View exist in the same universe as HitB and BotW?

  • Percy Gryce

    Jay: confirmed for … nostalgic?!?

  • Percy Gryce

    Josh: confirmed for … Gandalf.

  • EJ

    If you look closely, Jay is played by a different actor in Re:View than the one who plays him in HitB and BotW.

  • Xor

    THESE MEN ARE PAWNS

  • Xor

    Really ugly?

  • Variant

    o ok

  • RLMkeepitup

    and possibly drunks. Halloween is Oct 31 not Oct 13

  • bleurgh

    I’d love to see a good star wars movie with Ewan McGregor as Obi Wan. I hope that happens now that they’re making 1000 Star Wars movies.

  • Skewed_View

    Damn, man, lighten up. You made a smarmy comment you could have kept to yourself. I wasn’t trying to have the last word, I recognized my anecdote was pointless and was just having a little fun.
    No need to get your crank twisted and turn your asshole setting all the way up.

  • I’m just glad they got use out of that 35mm print of the Ishtar trailer.

  • HP Sauce is absolutely amazing, and miles ahead of the US A-1. Even better was the “chicken and ribs” version (which they thankfully stopped calling “fruity” a couple decades back) that appears to have been discontinued.

  • We’re all just waiting for Jessie’s re:View debut.

  • Ren1

    This movie looks great.

  • Caruso S.

    I’d rather see him in the inevitable ISHTAR reboot.

  • Is there a reason there’s no SoundCloud link/embed in this post?

  • Caruso S.

    Re:View DAY OF THE DEAD, you…you FRAUDS!

  • I have never even heard of this movie, but it looks awesome. I think I would still be traumatised by it today if I’d seen it as a kid! The effects of the minions (undercranked and force-perspective in camera) put today’s digital Hobbits to shame. Incredible stuff.

  • You guys also really need to do a re:View on The Devils. Ken Russell and Oliver Reed turned into hammy, drunken jokes but this film is incredible.

  • endeyequote

    his hair does look better longer. i noticed that in the half in the bag number crunching video.

  • Brian Levine

    I remember seeing this when it first came out. Finally…justification for my model rocket obsession.

    Anyone else ever tried taping one of those engines onto a Hot Wheels car? I had no idea it would go that fast. Took out a big chuck from the base of a tree. We could easily have killed someone. It was awesome.

  • Brian Levine

    You mean Dick the Birthday Boy?

  • Brian Levine

    That reminds me of the joke about the turtle and the rabbit who lived next door to each other.

    “Ssshhhh…”
    “Fftt”
    “Aaaaahhhhhhhh…..”

  • Variant

    I did too even though I’m pretty sure I hadn’t seen this as a kid. I think “hands coming from under the bed” is a fairly common fear as a child, and this movie executed it well.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Yeah I’m pretty sure this movie didn’t do that to me either. I woulda been 13 when it came out. I wasn’t worried much about hands under the bed at that time.

    When I was 8, hell yeah, there were monsters under my bed. And if I didn’t hide under the covers quickly enough they’d get me.

  • Variant

    Now do Ghost Dog: Way of the Samurai.

  • EJ

    Model rockets, and misusing model rocket engines, were the jam for nerdy 1980s kids. Just another thing this movie gets right about childhood.

    I never put one on a hot wheels car but we did strap one to a plastic model airplane, which flew surprisingly aerodynamically for about a hundred yards before obliterating itself in an empty parking lot.

  • instant relief

    HAR! HAR! HAR! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!

  • Like Icare

    Their colander may be upside down.

  • Like Icare

    Indeed. Both Waterworld and Postman are perfectly watchable movies.
    Particularly Postman. And particularly that Tom Petty bit.

  • Like Icare

    Indeed. Hackfraudery has went from 50% to 20000 dirham.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Confirmed for “Gate”.

  • Jerome Gorden

    Re-watched it four days ago.

  • Mark Bisone

    The eye-in-the-hand gag was also great nightmare fuel for me, but my most memorable image was Metal Rabies Nerd getting eye-stabbed by a Barbie.

  • Frank Lovejoy

    My re-view suggestion:

    Thriller: A Cruel Picture. The version without the Romeo & Juliet scenes.

  • Frank Lovejoy

    That movie is so juvenile. The whole scene where the Italian mobster dances around in his bathroom and raps, if my eyes rolled any harder they’d pop out of my head.

  • Frank Lovejoy

    There are a lot of holes in that story.

  • Frank Lovejoy

    It is just as bad as its reputation. The stars hated it. Warren Beatty called his agent about halfway through filming and ranted for an hour about how incompetent the director, Elaine May, was. His agent listened patiently and asked “Warren, why don’t you fire her?” And Beatty sighed and responded that he couldn’t … because he’s a feminist.

  • Frank Lovejoy

    Your reply to his reply to his comment reminds me of this comment reply comment that I read on another message board.

    Good times.

  • john smith

    Anyone seen Phantom Town (1999) ? It’s been a while so I don’t know how it’s held up but I remember it being one of those ”gateway” movies.

  • ZeroPtZero

    There was a cable access religious show on Sundays about how heavy metal was full of satanic messages. It was really unintentionally entertaining to teen metalheads. It was where we learned that the Dio logo was made so the font looks like “Devil.”

  • Welcome Back Otter

    “You know, I thought you were stupid, friend. But I underestimated you. You are a total freaking retard!”

  • Welcome Back Otter

    Ah yes, but how did the budgets compare?

  • Welcome Back Otter

    Given where Stephen Dorff’s career is at, it might be time for Gate 3!

  • Joe Syxpac

    I remember the trailer for this movie vividly. I was right at the target age for this film so it really appealed to me. The parts where the arm falls down and turns into fleeing maggots and the zombie falling down and shattering into minions really stuck with me. I remember wanting to see it so badly but my parents were like “No way, no how”.

    Luckily a friend of mine had HBO so I got to see it during a sleepover later.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I’m down for that.

  • Thanatos

    Jay looked so happy to lead into that Ishtar trailer

  • Crixxxx

    Ishtar beat The Gate in its opening weekend. (5/15-17/87) Ishtar also had a higher final gross. But Ishtar’s budget was massive, and it lost tens of millions, whereas The Gate was profitable.

  • RLMkeepitup

    my friends parents had cinemax in the 90s before I had a computer

  • RLMkeepitup

    Ishtar is a torture device , merely mentioning it I begin to vom

  • RLMkeepitup

    Ewan McGregor syndrome agreed to two Obi Wan movies??

  • Variant

    Hell yeah I knew there’d be a fan in here. I re-watch it at least once a year.

  • Variant

    Lol he did. He did a Linda Blair head swivel

  • Michael Collins

    So, do they even mention Star One Mon Mothma??

  • EJ

    “Let’s have an intelligent conversation here: I’ll talk, and you listen.”

  • EJ

    Maybe I need to watch it again – I was fairly young when I saw it and I remember laughing at the epic shittiness of some of the songs. “I’m quittin’ high school, ’cause you don’t like me!”

  • EJ

    Not seen that one. Is there any fagging off in it?

  • ikdks

    Do Swamp Thing. Wes Craven does DC comics.

  • EJ

    Fantastic lines from otherwise unremarkable movies: “You’ve got nothing to say, and you’re saying it too loudly!” – The Krays. Go!

  • John DeSpirito

    Sadly, The Gate did not kick Ishtar’s ass. But it was sooooo close.

    The Gate:
    opening: 4.2mil
    lifetime: 13.5mil
    budget: unknown

    Ishtar:
    opening: 4.3mil
    lifetime: 14.3mil
    budget: 55mil (lol)

  • Ishtar Cinematic Universe

  • Tucker & Walker

    Have never heard of this movie but it looks fun. I understand the re:view. I just waited for the comparison with Krampus and just in the end it came. Thank you.

  • RLMkeepitup

    the poster for amityville:the awakening is kinda neat. hope there’s no CG in it

  • Spoiled Ants

    Hasn’t he suffered enough? I just want to see him in good movies. I guess that excludes the Star Wars movies..

  • Spoiled Ants

    Thought I watched this movie when I was a kid. Turned out I didn’t…
    Gave it a go this weekend before I watched your review, to look at it with a fresh eye.
    The effects in this picture are freaking incredible.

    You should check out Burnt Offerings (1976) with Oliver Reed. The Shining lifted quite a fewideas of this picture (including the ending).

  • Like Icare

    True dat. But still less than in The Force Awakens.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    So you’re not obsessed with having the last word, then.

  • Jerome Gorden

    Ya, Ghost Dog was a very good, overlooked film.

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  • Tom K

    I saw this movie when I was little. Scared the hell out of me. Couldn’t sleep because I thought those things would burst through the wall. We’re talking a year or more of that.

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