The Care Boars Save Christmas


2003. An oooooold animated short film.

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  • dfadf

    So…early South Park without the funny

  • http://www.facebook.com/misterfitz Fitz von √úbermensch

    This had me in stitches. Well played!

  • anonymus

    I can’t help it, but whenever I watch this on christmas I have to weep. And repeatedly scream “NO NO NO NO NO NO”. And hit my head on a desk over and over again. And claw out my own eyes. And slit my wrists.

  • George Lucas

    You think you can out do me? Hah! I’ll show you a thing or two when I make my next movie.

  • http://twitter.com/OwMyVulcanEars Deicke

    I would love to know where these two soundbytes came from:
    “HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!” and the “LET’S GO!” which is also
    featured in other Plinkett works.

  • Hank

    I have a feeling this is Mike’s Star Wars Holiday Special, only worse

  • SoDense.gov

    When are you going to release the special edition of this. Make it so the Care Boars finger first!

  • Gooilt

    The Care Boars got shot out back for ruining Christmas.

  • Cliffman

    This always scares the fucking shit out of me. Basically, your comments on “Candid Candit Camera Volume 6″ apply to this. Fucking creepy shit. A RLM classic.

  • Navon Sensei

    I have watched this a million times now because it always plays when i finished watching another video. Why’s that? It always makes me laugh but what’s the deal with this anyway?

  • The Willard

    It’s coming…

  • The Willard

    Soon…

  • The Willard

    It was cancelled.

  • FearAndSlothing

    It doesn’t have to be…

  • The Willard

    Slothy?! Where is everyone?

  • FearAndSlothing
  • The Willard

    The raunch is really ramping up over there! That Slate’s a naughty fellow!

  • FearAndSlothing

    It’s a bit much even for me! I hope Rose doesn’t stumble in there half-asleep later…

  • The Willard

    Well, she’ll get her money’s worth!

  • FearAndSlothing

    I think Slate drove everyone away.

  • The Willard

    Drove out The Ninja, that’s for sure.

  • FearAndSlothing

    There really wasn’t any conversation going on anyway. Just smut.

  • The Willard

    Yeah, you can’t plan these things. It was more exciting this morning.

  • FearAndSlothing

    It started out well. then things got out of hand very quickly…

  • Demagog_Dog

    I deleted a few of the extreme ones

  • FearAndSlothing

    That’s good. I thought I was the kinky one…

  • The Willard

    Everyone was gone by the time I showed up, too. But you never know how these things will turn around.

  • Demagog_Dog

    I feel like Rick Moranis in Ghostbusters, trying to throw a party…

  • The Willard

    Yeah that was…a bit much.

  • The Willard

    Ha ha!

  • R J D

    hows this place tonight?

  • The Willard

    RJD says he was modded…

  • FearAndSlothing

    We aren’t doing anything wrong.

  • The Willard

    We aren’t. But RJD’s a saucy fellow.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I’m more of a slothy fellow!

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    He’s a bastard!

  • The Willard

    Yeah! He — oh, wait! Didn’t see you there!

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    OH!!! I’m sneaky.

  • FearAndSlothing
  • The Willard

    That chick has some man hands.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I’m gonna allow it…

  • R J D

    hey you guys

  • FearAndSlothing
  • The Willard

    Becky’s a wonderful woman with a great personality, and she’s cute as a button.

    But bitch got man hands.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I disagree.

  • The Willard

    It was just in that first photo. I think it was the angle.

    Just playing, Sloth! Her hands are lovely.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I’m glad you see it my way. I would hate to have to break out my cane sword.

  • The Willard

    I wouldn’t want to get in a fight, but honestly, I’m hardly worried. Have you seen my hand musket?

  • FearAndSlothing

    My gun has an axe at the end of the barrel. I fear no man!

  • franks_television

    How disappointing.

  • FearAndSlothing

    What’s disappointing. Not enough activity? We tried.

  • The Willard

    I was hoping you wouldn’t see.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Too late…

  • The Willard

    I have failed us all as Minister of Shenanigans.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Not true. from 13 to 55 comments. The night is young, Willard.

  • The Willard

    True!

  • FearAndSlothing
  • The Willard

    A sloth always cheers me up! Still hunting for the other pics….

  • FearAndSlothing

    Keep looking…

  • franks_television

    That’s all I can ask of you.

  • franks_television

    It’s OK. I haven’t seen much RLM stuff besides the Plinkett prequel reviews, which are brilliant.

  • The Willard

    Lend us your musket, frank. It’s a group effort.

  • The Willard

    We’re here out of love.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Strength in numbers!

  • FearAndSlothing

    For sure. Best of the Worst is my favorite show and it isn’t even on TV!!!

  • The Willard

    I found all the sloths!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Are you sure? how many did you find?

  • franks_television

    Someone needed to dissect the prequels like that. It’s necessary for the healing process.

  • The Willard

    Seven. I found seven sloths.

  • franks_television

    How many did you lose?

  • franks_television

    That explains it. I was not seeing what all the fuss was about.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I lost count. But I’m not done…

  • The Willard

    The Phantom Menace review is 90 minutes long and more entertaining that the film it reviews, and cuts right through that pile of BS like a razor.

  • The Willard

    I cheated though.

  • FearAndSlothing

    So true. I could watch over and over. Can’t stand to watch the actual film.

  • The Willard

    There was some wild stuff in there I tells ya.

  • franks_television

    Some people complain that he nitpicks, but I think it was essential to thoroughly identify everything that went wrong so we could understand it and have a chance to move on from the tragedy.

  • FearAndSlothing

    You followed my activity, you canadian bastard!

  • franks_television

    He works for the Canadian NSA.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Those guys make great burritos!

  • The Willard

    We’re much more laid back. We get donuts on Thursdays.

  • franks_television

    I think it was the lack of donuts that sent Snowden over the edge.

  • The Willard

    A donut a day keeps the madness away!

  • franks_television

    I always miss the controversial stuff. Ah well.

  • franks_television

    Ah ah ah! Seven Sloths!

  • The Willard

    Most people do. It’s quickly removed.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Then you haven’t found them all!

  • franks_television

    Her arm appears to be comically large.

  • The Willard

    I think there way have been some tinkering done with the image.

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    I can direct message you

  • franks_television

    The sloth photoshopped all these images I bet.

  • franks_television

    Make it so.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Every image I post is 100% authentic!

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    Done I sent you message through the TB message system.

  • franks_television

    I mean the sloth in the images is trying to make himself look like a player.

  • FearAndSlothing

    He’s doing a damn fine job!

  • The Willard

    How do you know he isn’t really a player? Look at his grin.

  • FearAndSlothing

    They’re gonna have to call animal control to get rid of all the sloths!

  • The Willard

    100 comments. We slothed this place.

  • franks_television

    That’s respectable.

  • franks_television

    He might be, but the arm thing is suspicious.

  • FearAndSlothing
  • franks_television

    Did you take my cane sword?

  • FearAndSlothing

    I have one too. I had it before you joined. Zatoichi gave it to me.

    http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2010/024/1/5/Sloth_Samurai_by_MissNeverwinter.jpg

  • franks_television

    The Slothstine Chapel. By Slothaelangelo.

  • The Willard

    She runs a sloth sanctuary. So the photoshop was likely done on her end, before he found the pic.

  • The Willard

    You’re more prepared than Batman.

  • franks_television

    And I thought I was being all original.

  • The Willard

    The moment man became sloth.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I didn’t change it. I swear.

  • FearAndSlothing

    The best one is in the wolf of wall street review…

  • The Willard

    This time I believe you.

  • FearAndSlothing
  • franks_television

    So she is trying to make it look like she’s got all these cool sloth friends? I get it.

  • FearAndSlothing

    She’s a goddess.

  • The Willard
  • The Willard

    And a friend to all sloths.

  • franks_television

    The fearsome giant sloth.

  • FearAndSlothing

    She’s the best!

  • franks_television

    She needs her own Discovery channel reality series. Beauty and the Sloth, perhaps. Or Sloth Boss.

  • FearAndSlothing

    It’s on animal planet. Meet the Sloths.

  • franks_television

    Is it really? I should have known. Hot girl + Sloths = Profit.

  • The Willard

    That’s the basic formula.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Seems to be working…

    Did you find them all?

  • franks_television

    Tried and true.

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    Can you use sexier sloths and average women?

  • The Willard

    I encountered a hiccup but I am back on track! Gimme a minute.

  • The Willard

    In a pinch, but your margins do fall.

  • FearAndSlothing
  • franks_television

    When sloths ruled the Earth…

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    I approve!

  • http://talkbacker.com/ Slate_Fistcrunch

    Pinch could be construed as BDSM….tread lightly!

  • franks_television

    That’s why these sloths are resorting to photoshop. It’s very hard for sloths to stay in shape. What with the slow movement.

  • The Willard

    Twenty-seven sloths so far!

  • franks_television

    Where are you counting these sloths?

  • FearAndSlothing

    I lost count. I hope they don’t get mad!

  • FearAndSlothing

    They’re dispersed throughout the site!

  • franks_television

    That’s quite a challenge.

  • FearAndSlothing

    They move very slowly, so they shouldn’t be too hard to catch!

  • franks_television

    But they have the ability to change colors to match their surroundings. That’s sloths, right?

  • The Willard

    “I have a sloth” received an outsider upvote. I suspect you will draw more.

  • The Willard

    They also fly.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Let’s hope so… My sides are hurting!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Sure, why not?

  • The Willard

    Mine too, buddy, mine too.

  • franks_television

    Truly amazing creatures.

  • FearAndSlothing

    It got an insider upvote. We’re the outsiders, Willard.

  • The Willard

    Not tonight, Sloth. Tonight the joint’s ours.

  • franks_television

    It’s like an M. Night Shyamalan movie.

  • FearAndSlothing

    What’s the twist?

  • FearAndSlothing

    I’m done… At least for a while. I’ve exhausted my backlog of sloth pics…

  • The Willard

    Well done. Rarely have I seen finer shenanigans.

  • franks_television

    That you are actually the outsiders all along.

  • FearAndSlothing

    That is a high compliment, coming from the Minister of Shenanigans, himself.

  • FearAndSlothing

    There’s an Outsiders (Nicole Kidman) sloth poster somewhere around here…

    Can you find it?

    I can’t remember where I put it.

  • The Willard

    In all honesty, perhaps the title should be yours.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Nope. That’s your title. I didn’t do anything…

  • franks_television

    I may be too slothful to attempt it.

  • The Willard

    That’s the spirit!

  • FearAndSlothing

    I understand. Honestly, I can’t remember which pics I posted and which I didn’t.

  • The Willard

    You may have doubled up on Night Idler. But I could be thinking of the time you posted elsewhere.

  • franks_television

    You both deserve an award ceremony similar to the end of Star Wars. Rose can be Leia, and I will be Chewbacca, standing to the side and not receiving a medal.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Yeah. I’m not sure. I know I posted it in the Dojo (or somewhere) before…

  • The Willard

    Your assistance is greatly appreciated. You earned your musket today, frank. You may shoot anyone in the face with it you see fit.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Preferably Peach! Where is he?

  • The Willard

    Watching I, Frankenstein twice!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Wow a masochist! Is he paying to watch that shite?

  • franks_television

    Sweet.

  • The Willard

    First he said he was going to watch it as a double bill with the Jack Ryan movie. Then he said he was going to watch them both again so he could write a review. Then he said he thought it might be a waste of money. So he’s probably just drinking Coors.

  • franks_television

    January is a funny time for movies. Someone needs to do an article commenting on all the January releases. Or maybe multiple people can volunteer to see one movie each and do a brief commentary on it, since no one could watch all of them.

  • FearAndSlothing

    If he was drinking Coors, he’d be here.

  • FearAndSlothing

    FUCK YOU, IT’S JANUARY!!!

  • FearAndSlothing

    A corset in July is worth a horde of rats.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Saw the first nude pic RJD posted and quickly switched on ‘hide media’ lol.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Probably for the Best! Godd Morning! How was your slumber. Can you find all the sloths? I think Willard uncovered over 30! I lost count…

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Thank God for that feature.

    Truth be told I was great until about 6am when I woke with stomach cramps, hot sweats and feeling like I was going to black out. That was rough. So shopping is cancelled and I am just resting in bed. :)

    Did you have fun last night?

    I guess it’s safe to turn on the pictures here so I’ll have a count lol.

  • FearAndSlothing

    We had fun creating Shenanigans here. My sides were hurting from laughter… All pics here are safe. The sloths are strewn about the site!

    Sorry to hear that you feel unwell. Hopefully your illness passes quickly.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Thanks.

    They are super cute! The one on the Dojo of Becky in the boat is the nicest. They are the cuddliest little animals.

  • FearAndSlothing

    I want to get one! You need a licence from the US Department of Agriculture though…

    I will be looking into it. Giz needs a playmate…

    If I can’t get a licence, I’m just gonna move to Costa Rica!

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    I honestly had no idea how cute they were. Do they need a special environment? OMG why don’t you email Becky and ask for advice!??

  • FearAndSlothing

    They dislike the cold. And it seems they get into mischief (slowly). I would need some kind of Sloth Cage for when I’m not at home. Luckily I have a guest bedroom, but no guests. I will be looking into converting into a habitat for a cute little sloth!

    Wow! I SHOULD E-mail Becky…

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Aww bless. I am not sure it’s fair to take them from their home in the heat.

    You should definitely email Becky and visit the sanctuary lol. Genius! Is she on twitter/facebook?

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose
  • FearAndSlothing

    I’m following here on twitter. Don’t have a Facebook…

  • The Willard

    Morning guys! We’re still here?! And welcome, Rose!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Willard! Someone is starting to notice our activity. He thinks you’re the real deal!

  • The Willard

    I am the real deal. I’m just not who he thinks I am!

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Morning Willard. I’m here and in the Dojo but I would rather go home to TB. :)

  • FearAndSlothing

    So thoughtful of you.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Don’t need it to read it :)

    https://www.facebook.com/becky.n.cliffe

    She studied in Manchester!

  • The Willard

    Home is where your heart is.

    And my heart is in shenaniganry!

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Actually scratch wheat I just said lol.

  • The Willard

    Do you know her? That would be a crazy coincidence.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    What not wheat lol. I’m losing it lol.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Oh I wish I did but nope. Remember I thought she was American lol.

  • FearAndSlothing

    Shenaniganry is my life. I will most likely die early due to misplaced shenanigans.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    She has a blog http://beckycliffe.blogspot.co.uk/

    Found it on her FB.

  • The Willard

    A shenanigan must be carefully deployed, always.

  • FearAndSlothing

    She has a big Shaggy Dog!

  • The Willard

    I found that last night, too!

  • The Willard

    I think you better give her a call!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Lots of new sloth pics!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Sometimes my shenani-gun goes off on it’s own.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose
  • FearAndSlothing

    Me too!

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Cool huh!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Don’t tempt me, Rose. I get into enough trouble on my own.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Lol! Well it was on her blog page looking for sponsers for the sanctuary http://beckycliffe.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/help-fund-research-at-sloth-sanctuary_26.html

  • FearAndSlothing

    Maybe if I write an article or two about the Sanctuary, I can secure an interview!

  • The Willard

    I’d like to see that article regardless.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Now you’re talking. Sounds like something for the mixed bag!

  • FearAndSlothing

    A sloth-overview, followed by info on the sanctuary and the important work they do. I’ll include a link to where you can donate!

  • FearAndSlothing

    We’re gonna need a Sloth Section…

  • The Willard

    Sounds great!

  • The Willard

    Thank you, Agent Shadow Rose, you have brought us over the 200 post mark. You have earned a musket. If you choose not to carry it (as is your right as Queen), you may place it in a prominent place for display, such as atop your mantle.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    I’ll put it over the fireplace. :)

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Gonna go for a nap. Need to catch up some sleep. See you guys at home later. :)

  • The Willard

    Later!

  • FearAndSlothing

    Take it easy, Rose. Sleep well. Hope you feel better.

  • http://rareenglishrose.com/ Shadow Rose

    Thanks. :)

  • The Willard

    Just checkin’ in. We’ll be arriving full force pretty soon.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Does 2 people qualify as full-force?

  • The Willard

    When they’re as forceful as us, you bet.

    Wait and see. We’ll recruit. Frank will be here. Dio will come. He can’t use his “I’m being moderated” excuse anymore!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    So, What’s the plan?

  • The Willard

    I don’t know. I’m hungover and trying to eat salad. Everybody’s gone. Not much of a shenanigan really.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Damn it! Pull yourself together man! put down that salad and pour a glass of scotch!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    How’s that salad comin’? Cobb or Ceasar? Ranch or Bleu Cheese?

  • The Willard

    It was an Asian salad. Had all kinds of nuts and dry noodles and dried fruits in it. Not bad.

    I’ll be back in a bit.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    But you just got here…

  • The Willard

    I know. Had to do stuff. I was online from the second I woke up! Now I’m getting ready for work, but I can post from work. Plus I’m getting a pizza. So no worries.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Beef and Onion, I hope.

  • The Willard

    Whatever it is, a pic will be posted.

  • franks_television

    So what’s this Care Boars thing all about?

  • BaronVonAbsinthe
  • The Willard

    Watch it and see!

  • The Willard

    Sloths who ride magic slices of pizza though space? Excellent!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe
  • The Willard

    Yeah! It’s the stuff dreams are made of!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Where’s your pizza pic?

  • The Willard

    Haven’t ordered it yet.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Fair enough. I already ate 2!

  • The Willard

    Did you downvote Bill or was that Peach? He hates me now.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    It was me. There aren’t any questionable optical effects in that film.

    If he says something stupid, I’m downvoting him!

  • franks_television

    Sounds risky.

  • The Willard

    That’s relief. I accept your downvote. I was feeling kind of woozy when I started watching it and I will have to begin again from the beginning, but I remember this very odd effect where the sky met the top of the house near the beginning. I must have been looking at it wrong.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Nope. Strange dreamlike imagery. not sure how it was accomplished.

  • The Willard

    It’s not great. It always starts at the end of their latest videos because it’s next in the queue. I don’t think I’ve made it through the whole thing once.

  • The Willard

    Okay then I really look forward to giving it another go.

  • franks_television

    I’m watching 90’s videos now, so maybe another time I will try it. Probably not.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Why is Peach mad at you? He plays games all the time…

  • The Willard

    Who knows. Maybe he isn’t. I can’t tell. He’s obtuse! He really hated Bill though. He’s always telling me how his respect for me is rapidly dropping. Maybe this was the last straw.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Fuck him if he can’t take a joke. Have you seen the new Best of the Worst yet?

  • The Willard

    I noticed it up there! I haven’t seen it yet. I’ve seen every single one though. Once the festing slows down I’ll get on it.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    It’s not the best, but it’s fun cuz I’ve seen 2 of the movies they watch.

  • The Willard

    I downloaded a movie I saw them do once. It was great. Xytro or something I believe i was called.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Xtro is actually a pretty good movie.

  • The Willard

    That was what I thought.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    They watched it by mistake! They did that with Thunderpants, too, which is a funny British family film.

  • The Willard

    The kid that farts? Yeah that looked great.

    I’m trying to search the site for the old Ocktoberfest articles. I can’t find the first one. I want to read again, see how things have changed.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    The first Fest (maybe the first two) were in the Dojo. Peach and I were trying to get you to call in instead of going to work so you could drink with us.

    Those were the good old days. He and I put Fest ads up all week long. And not just in the Dojo. In just about every thread on the site. Chicks making out, boobs, and beer! Good Times!

  • The Willard

    I miss those days. It’s all different now. I forgot that the first ones were in the Dojo. Man. I remember you guys telling me to call in sick. Funny.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Then the Fests started getting ugly, so Finn put a stop to it. But tonight seemed to go well, so maybe he’ll change his mind!

    Things usually turn blue as soon as Rose signs off…

  • The Willard

    We’ve all learned our lesson.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Clean tonight, though. In fact, last night was much raunchier.

  • The Willard

    Yep. It’s best to get it all out when it’s unexpected.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I woke up this afternoon and peeked into the Shadow Dojo…
    No idea where I found that gif! It’s fucking twisted.

  • The Willard

    It’s a little creepy. It would be alright if that girl’s tongue wasn’t so grotesquely overdeveloped.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Absinthe makes me do weird things sometimes.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    They STILL haven’t posted your Burrito recipe!!!

  • Kingpeach

    what is Red Letter Media?

  • Kingpeach

    that is the best thing i have seen all day and will probably ever see

  • Kingpeach

    What is this!?

  • Kingpeach

    You finally reveal yourself and then play the victim!? That is pure Bill. Ruthless!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I think it’s pretty damn funny!

  • The Willard

    I know. At least it is now listed as “scheduled”.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    oh. Maybe tomorrow then.

  • The Willard

    I haven’t even looked at it for years. I forget what it’s about.

  • franks_television

    Good night!

  • The Willard

    You’re so obtuse all the time! I can’t tell with you anymore.

  • The Willard

    Bye!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    already?! later…

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    There’s these Care Boars (kinda like the Care Bears) and they save Christmas!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    King Obtuse!

  • Kingpeach

    Why are you avoiding me all of a sudden after four months?

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    We never know who you are cuz you change your name 3-4 times a day!

  • Kingpeach

    I am gobsmacked by your ruthlessness.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe
  • The Willard

    Hardly.

  • The Willard

    Don’t talk damned nonsense.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    If he doesn’t talk nonsense, he’ll just be silent!

  • Kingpeach

    the night is young. so saeth me.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I’m drinking coffee. I’ll be up for awhile.

  • The Willard

    I’m here all night boys. Sober though.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I think I might do an article for my Fuckle Juice recipe once things get quiet.

  • Kingpeach

    give the sloth bullshit a rest

  • Kingpeach

    i have like 6 buds left…and a bunch of comics…plus the internet…music…i’m chilling

  • Kingpeach

    I believe nothing you say now

  • The Willard

    You want to see a pic of my pizza? It just got here.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Yes

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Why? I’m planning an article. I sent an e-mail to the sloth sanctuary hoping for an interview…

  • Kingpeach

    that’s just what beefaroni would say to hoodwink me

  • The Willard

    Hold on a minute. Dropbox is taking forever.

  • Kingpeach

    haha I’m just kidding mang i love the sloths

  • Kingpeach
  • Kingpeach

    Very clever BaronVonAbsinthe

  • Kingpeach

    Oh shut up you arriviste

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I usually am.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I don’t speak French.

  • The Willard

    Good song, wrong room.

  • Kingpeach

    Tait Toi

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    The other room is empty now.

  • The Willard

    Seems that way.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I guess everyone else sleeps at night.

  • Kingpeach

    what is red letter media?

  • The Willard

    So backwards.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    They need help.

  • The Willard

    Man dropbox isn’t working for me and I can’t get my pics off my phone.

  • Kingpeach

    whatever I’m posting pixies shit all over da place

  • Kingpeach

    yeah because you decamped here nerd

  • The Willard

    Might as well.

  • Kingpeach

    why did you decide to finally step forward mr. ?

  • The Willard

    No, it’s both places at once.

  • The Willard

    I thought you knew before. I wasn’t trying to trick anyone. You should read Bill’s article again. You might find it funny now!

  • Kingpeach

    I never said it wasn’t funny. I have no animus towards Bill at all. You are a genius.

  • The Willard

    Aww. Are we BFFs again?

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    We were in both places. And we’re all nerds.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    This webzone is littered with sloths!

  • The Willard

    More sloths than pizza rolls…think about that!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe
  • The Willard

    ALSO: THE CASE OF THE GIRL WHO WAS SHOT IN HER STUPID FACE!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    A sequel of sorts.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Whatever happened with that fabled pizza you spoke of earlier?

  • The Willard

    I can’t make it work! Don’t ask me why! I’ve never had this problem before. I have a nice pic on my phone that I can neither transfer to my computer or post to disqus from my phone.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Did you see that food critic! He just mixed the beefaroni and the ravioli together. No fucks given!

  • The Willard

    That was amazing.

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    I just watched him eat at Taco Bell!

  • The Willard

    Wow, in the field!

  • BaronVonAbsinthe

    Yep! he brought the camera to the Taco Bell and ate one-handed so he could continue shooting!

  • The Willard

    I’m so glad those Care Boars were able to stop that mean Mister Scary and save Christmas!

  • The Willard

    Fuckle Juice is an excellent beverage. It goes really well with a late night burrito-binge.

  • The Willard

    I can’t wait for Space Cop.

  • The Willard

    Disqus seems to be down.

  • The Willard

    Hmmm. It’s working here.

  • franks_television

    Care boars.

  • Slothrop

    They are the best. The Care Boars don’t get enough love.

  • Arkansloth

    I couldn’t possibly agree with you more! I’m drinking a warm mug of Fuckle Juice right now. No burritos in the house. I’ll have to make do with pizza rolls.

  • Arkansloth

    It’s gonna be fucking epic. I hope it plays at the local cineplex.

  • The Willard

    Hi Care Boars! We’ll be back soon!

  • DracuSloth

    If not for us, The Care Boars would be very lonely.

  • The Willard

    We’ve changed their lives for the better, I think.

  • DracuSloth

    It’s important to give back. They saved Christmas, after all.

  • The Willard

    We’re utilizing this space too inefficiently. It will take us too long to become the highest-counting Talkback of all time at our current rate of postage. We must step up our game. The focal point should remain centered around fests as the main point of concentrated attack, but we would do well to bear this place in mind at all other times of the day and night as we go about our online business.

  • DracuSloth

    Yes. We must step up our efforts. We’ve been slacking off. The Shenanigan Gods would not approve.

  • The Willard

    No they would not. I fear they may smite us.

  • DracuSloth

    We must make up for lost time!

  • The Willard

    Yes. Yes we should. And we must get frank back in here as well.

  • DracuSloth

    Yeah. This thread needs more snark.

  • The Willard

    He is the snark master.

  • DracuSloth

    It is literally his job. Minister of Snark.

  • The Willard

    He’s been a tad slack in his duties of late. Hopefully he makes up for it soon with a snark hurricane.

  • DracuSloth

    I think he was busy with potential romantic interests. But it sounds like that didn’t work out, so he should be back in full force soon.

  • The Willard

    No doubt snarkier than ever in that case!

  • DracuSloth

    Brace yourself for a Tsnark Tsunami.

  • Slothrop

    God Bless them!

  • Navon Sensei

    Are there no admins around? These assholes spam the whole comment section with their random shit that needs to be baned.

  • Meester Smeeth
  • Now I Get It

    I thought these guys came and went weeks ago, but, no, they keep changing their user names and hanging around. As for banning them…? The spam seems to be in their profiles and not in their posts proper, so…I don’t know.

  • The Willard

    Smells kinda stale in here…

  • The Willard

    Assholes? We’re all of us very fine gentlemen. Distinguished even.

  • The Willard

    We’re unbannable. It’s because we’re so lovable.

  • The Willard

    Ayuh.

  • The Willard

    They really don’t.

  • franks_television

    I reckon so.

  • franks_television

    We were Baned on another site, so we had to come here. He threatened to kill us.

  • The Willard

    *spits*

  • franks_television

    Sorry for disrupting the lively and spirited Care Boars discussion that was in progress.

  • The Willard

    Really. How did he even know we were here? He would have had to really been looking. I bet he was a hall monitor.

  • The Willard

    We discovered that it isn’t necessary to understand what a fella is saying to know that he’s threatening to kill you. It always comes across.

  • franks_television

    Definitely a tattletale personality. It’s very funny. Probably the RLM admins have more to worry about than people having an off-topic discussion in a months old thread.

  • franks_television

    I’m curious as to what spam you are referring, my good man.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I don’t smell anything…

  • The Willard

    He wasn’t invited to Li’l Jeff’s party, and all the other kids were talking about it the next day in class. He never got over it.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I think you mean “banned”. Please learn to spell, then try again!

  • The Willard

    The sun is shining once again, and the cobwebs are being dusted.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Hey! I was a hall monitor. Jerk!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I hate spam. No spam from Sloth.

  • The Willard

    Well then you must have been the cool one. I bet you looked the other way when Ron had to cut class!

  • The Willard

    Not even fried do I like spam.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We had cool badges and we could get away with anything.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I do not like that fucking Spam.
    I do not like it, Sam I Am.

  • franks_television

    Well, I can relate to that. But if there’s one thing I’m not, it’s a NARC.

  • franks_television

    Did you abuse your authority?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Of course. What’s the point of obtaining authority if you aren’t gonna abuse it?

  • franks_television

    Spammity spam! Wonderful spam!

  • franks_television

    I think that’s in the Constitution somewhere.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    This is my new favorite song!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_geqv73zx0

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    It’s in the fine print.

  • The Willard

    My Dojo muscle is out of practice.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • The Willard

    Why didn’t we ever think to combine Dojo and fruit loops? These men are clearly geniuses.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We’re outta shape.

  • franks_television

    Pretty boss.

  • The Willard

    Well the fuckers closed the track!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    It’s too late now.

  • The Willard

    Also “Power Point Dojo”. Clearly they operate on a whole other level.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I missed the whole thing. I would’ve raised Holy Hell.

    Talk about alienating your base…

  • The Willard

    Nope. There’s nothing remotely NARCish in you.

  • franks_television

    Cooler than Excel Dojo.

  • franks_television

    Darn straight.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    According to my research, “Dojo” is a German ad agency and this video is meant to drum up business while also advertising some of the products they represent.

    They also mention Facebook and GoPro.

  • franks_television

    It’s rather baffling to me.

  • The Willard

    It’s a shame you weren’t there. You could have swayed them!

  • franks_television

    Better do some stretching before any serious shenaniganry.

  • The Willard

    Oh most assuredly. I am in no kind of shape for proper shenaniganry.

  • The Willard

    He is a wrathful and smiting god.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We drop in occasionally, just for fun.

    We actually love RLM (especially Best of the Worst).

    As for the name changes, I’m easy to spot cuz there’s always a “sloth” in there somewhere.

    http://cuteoverload.files.wordpress.com/2013/06/photo.jpg?w=560&h=746

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I doubt that. You are over-estimating my power. Dio did that too.

    He told me the site was doomed without me. He’s lost the plot.

  • The Willard

    And I’m always a Willard. I was going to be Willard I Am but I never got the chance.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Who? Finn?

    I think he’s downsizing because the site is running on fumes…

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Only improper shenanigans for now.

  • franks_television

    I don’t see the drawback to the Dojo. If it’s because it gets too long and that somehow slows the site down, I would be fine with a new one each week or something. Other than that, I don’t see how it takes away from any other aspect of the site.

  • The Willard

    It is doomed without you. I peek in from time to time. It’s a ghost town. Frank is trying his best but the others just refuse to shenaniginate.

  • The Willard

    Yeah, that guy. And you may be right. Almost all articles these days are Tikk’s news posts.

  • franks_television

    We are all the poorer for it.

  • The Willard

    Those have their own unique charms.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I think he feels like there aren’t enough comments elsewhere, plus it distracts us from writing articles.

  • The Willard

    Well then that certainly backfired.

  • franks_television

    Except I think without the Dojo, people will be less interested in participating in the site by writing articles or commenting. Dojo people made up a large portion of comments in other articles.

  • The Willard

    Had my avatar picked out and everything. I had a little stockpile.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I feel the same. He made a mistake. Will he course-correct? Who knows?

  • franks_television

    He seems pretty set on no Disqus dojo at least, based on what he’s said. Maybe he’ll change his mind. I do wonder if the site can make it with or with the Dojo. I think it deserves to but I guess there is a lot of competition even though I think Talkbacker could have its own niche.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Our shenanigans were not appreciated by the powers that be.

  • franks_television

    Such hilarity I am missing out on.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    But the community aspect was the niche and the Dojo was our Town Hall.

  • The Willard

    No they were not.

  • franks_television

    Yeah, I think so too. A community of movie geeks running their own site.

  • The Willard

    Well, not really.

  • The Willard

    Well put. How he doesn’t see that is peculiar.

  • franks_television

    I’ve enjoyed all your screen name variations.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I stockpile sloths… And retro horror reviews.

  • franks_television

    I bet I will miss out on a ton of schlocky 70’s horror movies now.

  • The Willard

    I do aim to please.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Maybe he’s blind. We should send him some bifocals.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Now they will just sit here collecting dust, unread by anyone.

    Just like the ones that got published!

  • The Willard

    I never considered he had an actual disability but now that you mention it it fits the facts the best.

  • The Willard

    You should have reviewed Iron Man 3.

  • franks_television

    Invented by Ben Franklin. True story.

  • franks_television

    How will you score chicks now?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    That guy loved opium.

  • The Willard

    And kites.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Never. After sitting through Thor 2, I’m done with comic book movies.

  • The Willard

    Darn tootin’.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I guess I’ll have to revert to my old method: Whipping my cock out at parties!

  • The Willard

    Under the right circumstances that can be effective.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    The two go together.

  • The Willard

    Alternately, you could review that paint-drying film.

  • The Willard

    Every child knows that!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Seems kinda pointless. I have nowhere to publish my reviews now.

  • The Willard

    Post them here! In a long Disqus post.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    That’s sure to get us “baned”!

  • The Willard

    Yes, Mr. Navon Sensei would surely blow his stack if such pranks were initiated.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • The Willard

    Can only the long-haired sloths operate motor vehicles?

  • franks_television

    Damn, I wish I had thought of that.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I bet that guy hasn’t even been to a Shoji Tabuchi concert.

  • franks_television

    It would be highly inappropriate.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Also works during field trips!

  • franks_television

    You betcha.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • franks_television

    And French prostitutes.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Mr Franklin and I share a lot of interests.

  • franks_television

    Still trying to arrange that strip club field trip.

  • franks_television

    He seems like a cool guy.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Just tell them “Sloth said it was OK”.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Way cooler than Taft.

  • The Willard

    To be honest, this fellow appears not quite to have the hang of it. Three toes that are really just claws are sometimes a liability, it would seem.

  • The Willard

    That’s my go-to argument!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • franks_television

    Can do!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Works on everyone unless they’re named Finn!

  • The Willard

    It’s nice that he lets his pal, red-eyed tree frog ride the wing like that. Good thing you have sticky feet, frog!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I can write a letter of recommendation if it’s required.

  • franks_television

    Taft was overweight. Little known fact.

  • franks_television

    Just make sure it’s on official Sloth letterhead.

  • franks_television

    I imagine that set of circumstances is extremely narrow.

  • franks_television

    Restaurant?

  • The Willard

    It requires excellent judgement of circumstances, yes. Precision judgement even. Very risky.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Searched for “Sloth letterhead”. This will have to suffice…

    https://mrminer.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/phish94rndornaso.jpg?w=450

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Choose the wrong moment, and you’ll regret it. Trust me.

  • franks_television

    When Rose logs onto Twitter tomorrow she is going to have like a million notifications.

  • The Willard

    Haberdashery, oddly.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    no. It’s a picture.

  • The Willard

    I noticed that!

  • franks_television

    Ah. Silly me.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    That’s what she gets for talking about porn.

  • franks_television

    Had to look that up. Sewing supplies it seems.

  • franks_television

    Oh yeah, I forgot that whole conversation originated with porn.

  • The Willard

    That’s where I had to do my clothes shopping in my cowboy days.

  • The Willard

    When you think about it, porn is the origin of all things.

  • franks_television

    All the best cowboys shop at the Flying Sloth.

  • franks_television

    That is the next episode of Cosmos I think.

  • franks_television

    Peach is tweeting. He should come over here.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Can they show porn on cable?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I don’t think Peach is hip to RLM.

  • franks_television

    If it’s educational.

  • franks_television

    Peach is a hep cat.

  • The Willard

    How is porn ever not educational?

  • franks_television

    I’ve certainly learned a lot from it.

  • The Willard

    He was here once. He wasn’t quick to cotton on though.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Peach is a cunt.

  • franks_television

    He is all these things and more.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I recently acquired this…

    http://vinegarsyndrome.com/launch/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/VS-018_DVD_web.jpg

    It’s a documentary about blowjobs!

  • The Willard

    Finally!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I get strange things in the mail…

  • The Willard

    I bet you do!

  • franks_television

    Is it rude to have a conversation on Twitter? Are you just supposed to post stand alone witty comments?

  • The Willard

    At first I worried about that. Then I stopped worrying about it.

  • The Willard

    They can’t Bane you from Twitter!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I think it’s rude not to…

  • franks_television

    I assume you ordered it rather that it just randomly showing up in your mailbox?

  • franks_television

    I guess if Norm MacDonald can tweet a play by play of an entire golf tournament it’s OK.

  • The Willard

    They just send it to him now.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I ordered a different movie. There’s been some kind of hold-up due to the limited nature of the release. They sent me a few DVD’s to say sorry.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Pretty much.

  • The Willard

    I had to unfollow him! I could handle the long scrolls of golf shit, although I didn’t enjoy it, but it was crashing my Twitter.

  • franks_television

    That’s too bad. I will retweet if he posts anything really funny.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    You need a better Twitter.

  • franks_television

    It’s a safe assumption he’ll want it.

  • The Willard

    Thanks pal! Turns out Steve Martin is quite witty though. He is a master Twitterist.

  • franks_television

    Can’t they?

  • The Willard

    This is likely the case. You know where I can get one?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Vintage pornography fully restored from the original camera negative? Yes, please!

  • franks_television

    I think I’ve heard that. I should follow him. Didn’t he put out a book of his tweets?

  • The Willard

    I suppose he has his people everywhere…

  • franks_television

    Black market.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I’ma see him play the banjo this summer!

  • The Willard

    He certainly could. He’s really good.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Try a pet store that specializes in birds.

  • franks_television

    I saw Jesus on AICN recently. Speaking of Baning.

  • The Willard

    Excellent! He’s as good at that as he is at comedy. He may be the only actor/musician who is great at both.

  • franks_television

    I hear he’s good at that, too.

  • The Willard

    Was he mad?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    He’s written some decent novels too. He’s one wild and crazy guy!

  • The Willard

    I’d be willing to read one of his novels. In fact more than willing. I’ma get on that!

  • franks_television

    I didn’t talk to him. He was posting about the sequel to that The Purge movie. He was of the opinion that the first one sucked.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    He liked Pacific Rim so his opinion is not to be trusted.

  • franks_television

    Well I think he’s probably correct in this particular assessment.

  • The Willard

    Seems like a book he would write, doesn’t it?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    BOOOOO!!!!

  • The Willard

    He was a virulent Pacific Rim supporter.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    A sure sign of delusion.

  • franks_television

    Referring to The Purge, not Pacific Rim. Pacific Rim was very stupid.

  • franks_television

    Why is the organization of comments so confusing on Twitter?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Haven’t seen The Purge. I’m boycotting the theater/new movies.

  • The Willard

    Cause Twitter is essentially ass!

  • The Willard

    Believing oneself to be the Son of God doesn’t help, either.

  • franks_television

    Except for Michael Bay’s Ninja Turtles I assume.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I don’t think it’s intended for conversation.

  • The Willard

    Well Misuse is my middle name!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I refuse to see Teenage CGI Ninja Turtles!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    The Misuse Willard?

  • franks_television

    Why is it so hard to have a decent internet discussion these days?

  • The Willard

    Has a ring to it, doesn’t it?

  • franks_television

    But it looks so good!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Because the Dojo is gone…

  • franks_television

    I miss the AOL chatrooms of yore.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I’ll watch it if Vanilla Ice has a cameo. If not, what’s the point?

  • The Willard

    We’ve nearly doubled the comment-count here this night at least.

  • The Willard

    Were they like Dojos? I was not hip to this AOL you speak of.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Did you have COL instead?

  • franks_television

    America Online. It was the original internet provider. Yeah, they were a bit like Disqus. Comments showed up in real time. Just random people talking about stuff.

  • The Willard

    Yeah, it was always bogging down from the syrup!

  • The Willard

    Why don’t they bring that shit back? That’s sort of my thing.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Sop that shit up with some flapjacks!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Isn’t that what we’re doing now?

  • The Willard

    Sure, but why isn’t America doing it?

  • franks_television

    As a teenager I spent many hours doing that. Of course they charged hourly rates so my parents weren’t happy with that.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We are America. Part of it, anyway. The rest of the country is watching Noah and stuffing their fat faces with popcorn.

  • The Willard

    I never had the internet as a teen, then I moved out and was too poor for a computer never mind the internet, so I missed a lot of that stuff. Just getting tech-savvy (if you can call me remotely tech-savvy) now.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Were the chatrooms full of hookers?

  • franks_television

    It’s a good question. Web browsing changed so they didn’t really have the instant messaging capacity like the original AOL service did. I don’t really know, though.

  • The Willard

    Don’t you want to find out if they make it through the Flood? Personally, I’m not sure that boat of logs is up to the task. And don’t get me started on the animal problem.

  • franks_television

    I assume that all the girls I talked to were actually middle aged men.

  • The Willard

    If I was a smarty-pants internet entrepreneur I would def bring that shizznit bazzazzack.

  • franks_television

    I hadn’t even heard of this movie until a few days ago. Now it seems to be a big deal.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    No thanks. I want to see Grand Budapest Hotel, but it isn’t playing.

  • The Willard

    A safe bet.

  • franks_television

    Nice lingo!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    It’s the new Passion of the Christ. Now with cuddly animals!

  • The Willard

    Thazzazzanks!

  • franks_television

    WTF is the deal with that? They are advertising it like crazy but it seems only a select few get to see it.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Why the hourly rates? Sounds like a seedy motel on the outskirts of town.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    They don’t want my money.

  • The Willard

    I thought it was just me in my little prairie town. Glad it’s you guys too.

  • franks_television

    That’s how it was done back in the days of dial-up. Like long-distance phone service.

  • franks_television

    How sad. Not sure how I would have gotten through high school without being able to slowly download jpegs of naked women while trying not to wake my parents.

  • franks_television

    True for most movies.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    No GBH but Noah is on 4 screens. Fuck the theaters. They cater to a different demographic.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Except That’s My Boy.

  • The Willard

    That was when I visited my dad. Only three minutes for a medium-sized image!

  • franks_television

    We got Moonrise Kingdom but not this for some reason. Wes Anderson Teasery!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I remember those days! Kids today have it so easy. Streaming porn available on their phones at all times. rotten bastards!

  • franks_television

    Not bad! I remember how exciting it was when the nipples finally loaded.

  • The Willard

    Kids must be masturbating all over the place now!

  • The Willard

    Kept you going til you got to the prize!

  • franks_television

    Fucking millennials.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    No wonder the floors are sticky!

  • franks_television

    Whoa. Am I talking to LL Cool J or something?

  • franks_television

    Actually Slothrop is technically a millennial I guess. Willard and I just missed it. Damn you Slothrop, with your cell phones and CD players.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Am I? I feel too old to be a millennial. I don’t even know what a millennial is.

  • The Willard

    You’re a gen-Xer in a Millennial’s body.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • franks_television

    If you’re born after 1980. That means you’re the same generation as high school freshman. Whereas Willard and I are Gen X’ers like Christian Slater.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    What’s the cut-off? I originated in ’83.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    What a bunch of bollocks!

  • The Willard

    I think we’re right on the cusp of Gen Z and Gen Y.

  • franks_television

    I think they just scrapped the whole Generation Y thing.

  • The Willard

    Actually you’re a Vietnam Vet in a Millennial’s body.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    The Y stands for Youtube!

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We never did get that log flume…

  • The Willard

    It wasn’t cutting the mustard.

  • franks_television

    He’s got buddies who died face down in the muck so that you and I can enjoy this Care Boars thread.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • franks_television

    What wouldn’t cut through mustard? Mayonnaise I guess.

  • The Willard

    No, mayonnaise does not cut the mustard at all.

  • franks_television

    Damn it, what is that from? I’m going to feel like an idiot.

  • The Willard

    It sounds like you half-got it, whereas I did not get it at all. So you win.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    I refuse to tell.

  • franks_television

    OK. I found it. It was South Park. Apologies for the outburst.

  • The Willard

    I hear a sloth never tells…

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • franks_television

    Thanks. Now I remember.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    We need to find a way to get more people involved in this shenanigan.

  • franks_television

    I agree.

  • The Willard

    I Tweeted Peach and he just doesn’t care! What’s up with that? Is he a man or a mouse?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    He’s actually a sperm whale.

  • franks_television

    He’s busy playing Minecraft apparently. Do you just build stuff in that game?

  • franks_television

    The manliest kind of whale.

  • The Willard

    You build everything in the game using your environment. It really is quite fun, although some people seem to hate it.

  • franks_television

    Is there a social aspect?

  • The Willard

    Certainly the spermiest.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    The Burt Reynolds of the ocean.

  • The Willard

    That’s why they have the ‘stache!

  • The Willard

    If there is it eludes me.

    But there probably is. I think maybe you can jump into other people’s worlds.

  • franks_television

    Do you have to fight anything?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop
  • The Willard

    Yeah, at night the monsters come out. You will die very quickly at the start of the game because you have no weapons yet. So you have to tunnel into some dirt and then cover up the entrance to your little cave and wait it out. Kind of boring the first night or two, until you get going.

  • franks_television

    That looks more like my kind of game!

  • The Willard

    Madhog has that game!

  • franks_television

    Well that sounds a bit more interesting.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    The Dojo is dead
    Talkbacker will soon follow
    Fun while it lasted

  • franks_television

    Poor Madhog. God bless ‘im.

  • The Willard

    You should try it. There’s a free one called Survivorcraft you can get for your phone.

  • franks_television

    That is one depressing haiku.

  • The Willard

    Someone really oughtta tell him.

  • The Willard

    I have to disappear for awhile now, but if America is interested, America can find me here from time to time, waiting for some kindly soul to throw a shenanigan…

  • franks_television

    As long as he’s happy I say let him do his thing.

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Sad Sloth doesn’t care
    The world is filled with darkness
    What do you expect?

  • http://www.talkbacker.com Slothrop

    Later, Mang!

  • franks_television

    Perhaps. Although the last thing I need is something else to waste time on.

  • franks_television

    True enough.

  • franks_television

    OK, I should go to bed too. Nice talking to you gentlemen.

  • Beefaroni Bill

    What happened to the sloths?

  • Navon Sensei

    It takes a new category of an idiot to be distracted by a minor flaw to completly miss the point and fortify its position in just one word. Congratulations, Sir!

  • Meester Smeeth

    Lighten up.

  • Now I Get It

    But he called you new and fortifying. Don’t you want to see his prize inside?

    http://mightymega.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/batman_cereal_boxes_postma_3.jpg

  • Meester Smeeth

    Well, now I do!

  • Ted

    why does santa have jaundice?

  • AceRay

    The only funny part was when the bad guy turns the dial from “toys” to “nuclear warheads”, as though that was always built in Santa’s workshop

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