Pre-Rec: Alien Isolation

October 19, 20141,180 Comments

Jack and Rich play Alien: Isolation. The game that opens doors to a new genre… Door Opening.

Music from http://www.bensound.com
The Elevator Bossanova
&
Dubstep

We played the Playstation 4 and PC version.
In the dark
With Headphone
We are fans of the Alien franchise


Filed in: Previously Recorded

  • Wizard Phoenix

    To my Rich,
    I have been thinking about how I could possibly tell you how much you mean to me. I remember when I first started to fall in love with you like it was last night. Lying naked beside you in that tiny apartment, it suddenly hit me that I was part of this whole larger thing, just like our parents, and our parents’ parents. Before that I was just living my life like I knew everything, and suddenly this bright light hit me and woke me up. That light was you. I can’t believe it’s already been 50 years since you married me. And still to this day, every day, you make me feel like the girl I was when you first turned on the lights and woke me up and we started this adventure together.
    Happy Anniversary, my love and my friend til the end.
    Wizard

  • MPJZ

    I don’t understand why people get angry over reviews. I disagreed with them about sonic, but I didn’t call them morons over it. It just seems like an opinion is a silly thing to get angry about.

  • craptonium

    As soon as i hear that wub wob fart music, all my entertainment appetite vanishes. Every time.

  • Spraynard kruger

    Man, Pre-Rec just feels like cynicism at this point. Almost every episode I find it hard to find actual constructive criticism. What about the positives? I don’t understand. Fucking Half in the Bag is less cynical than this, and they watched Jack and Jill.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s everywhere….

  • Richey Hackett

    Sorry guys, but this is the first time that I’ve ever disagreed with you over something. Alien: Isolation is a fantastic experience and a worthier entry in the Alien franchise than any other film or game since Alien 3.

  • Dippo

    The alien is so clumsy and humanlike, haha
    Game reviewers seem to be sometimes insistent on hyping something, not that the game is great or perfect, but that they WANT it to be great or perfect, and it’s contagious on a lot of people. Then if this opinion is widespread it can be hard for the laymen to admit that the game isn’t.
    All games should challenge people to use creative thought, a game that says “press a then b then c” is not a test or a challenge and is completely unrewarding. 🙁

  • Guest

    I need help to open this door so that I can find out what happened to my mother. She has an important message for me regarding the evening meal.

  • Osbor

    i should not be surprised they hated it.
    i think pre-rec is headed towards;
    “if you want to be viewed positively, be made by nintendo”

  • Riv_l

    Why is everyone saying they hate everything? They liked Guacamelee a lot.
    Plus the fact that it’s there opinion, people need to calm the fuck down.

    The closet thing was most likely inspired by Amnesia, which is a pretty creepy game, but since there’s no horror, it doesn’t work.

  • Indiana

    Bought the game – played for 3 hours but don’t think I’ll go back to it. The DLC is cool though. Playing as Ellen Ripley on the Nostromo is what’s making it worth the money. At least that’s what I tell myself.

  • SkaMP

    Dear Son,
    I have blown up the kitchen to save you from my cooking
    Love, Mother

  • its called bleach

    FART BAR

  • I really want to buy a PS4, but I see no reason to. All that I was looking forward to is looking like crap or will be on PC/Mac.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Yo! I’ve that same calculator, yo!

  • Dippo

    You don’t need to be sorry!

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I’ve never laughed at your Pre-Rec shows before this, but the inserted personal quotes at the beginning and the door opening montage were quite funny for the entire household.

  • Richey Hackett

    Apology rescinded!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Perhaps they didn’t like the game, you Kotaku loving asshole.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Mike and Jay don’t come across like friends or buddies in their movie reviews. It’s much more structured, even when it’s off-script.

    Jay and Rich sound like a group of guys just chatting it up at your local GameStop who’ve known each other for years.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    No refunds!

  • David

    Amnesia works because you never see the monster. Unless you’re willing to keep your monster off-screen for more or less two thirds of your game (no studio is going to do this with a major licensed franchise) it’s not going to work on the same level as good horror movies or books.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    I dunno if they played on easy or normal or what, but from what I’ve seen of the game being played on hard, the AI seems pretty merciless.

    I also have a hard time understanding the people (referring to the YouTube comments) who call every positive review “paid off” and think that a reviewer is only being honest if they’re shitting on the game. To me this review was way too hung up on personal preferences to be considered trustworthy.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I think Jack and Rich here just nailed why games based in the Alien universe barely work. They’re movies about tension. However the tension you might see in an Alien movie is almost impossible to recreate in a video game. In this game you have a motion tracker and you can use it to determine where it is. So if you’re in the vents of the ship it kills the fucking tension because one you know where it is and two you’re trying to recreate the fear and scares from Alien. In the first film when Dallas goes in the vents to find the Alien and kill it he doesn’t know if it’s actually in there and either do we only until it’s too late. When Dallas is “killed”, and I use quotes because of the director’s cut, it’s sudden and shocking because he was confused as was we. Giving a fucking motion tracker to the player doesn’t make it an Alien game, taking it a while and guessing where it is will make it an Alien game. You see like Jay for Evil Dead I am huge fan of the Alien franchise. I have every VHS, DVD, and Blu-Ray copy of the films, and by films I mean the first two because they’re the only good ones. I have every sound, every scene, and every scene of dialogue remembered. People like Ridley Scott and James Cameron understand why the Xenomorph is scary. It’s because you have no clue where it was. Even if they had the motion tracker they couldn’t tell where exactly it was also they didn’t have time to prepare for when they were coming most of the time. In Alien Isolation you can prepare for when the Xeno is coming, which takes a way from the “I don’t know when or where it’s coming” part. The tension in the Alien movies is different than a game. Translating that can mean a lot of problems. Movie magic makes the alien scary, not the alien it self. Also why can’t you kneel down in the lockers or closets? You’re hiding from a predatory creature created by Space Jockeys. You might want to do that.

  • Drain

    From what I gather here, the game’s biggest problem is that it was needlessly stretched out to 20 hours so they could make more money off of. They padded out the price tag with doors and long sections of hiding in lockers waiting 5 minutes before you can move. They’re then selling a “Season Pass” with more DLCs right off the bat. It’s sad to see this kind of practice become common place. The overpriced base game has very little value in it, then where that value could have been, it was instead put into DLCs which will cost even more money.

  • My 2 Cents

    So when they say that they hate it when the seams show and it takes you out of the viewing experience, did they intentionally mean to have that tripod leg in the shot?

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Does this game have anything involving the acid spit? I was always afraid of the acid spit with the Alien. I thought it’d be fascinating to have this where you could hear the alien, you knew it was nearby, and on top of that you had to keep an eye out for the acid spit to drop on you.

    Or! Wouldn’t it be cool if other crew members got impregnated? Then you’d have to decide whether to kill the crew member to prevent alien babies or keep finding the Momma. Your decisions potentially up the tension, because if you kill the crew member, the Alien would know where you are, but if you ran off, then you’d be dealing with multiple aliens.

    Hiding in a locker doesn’t really work for me.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Aliens spit acid? I thought they only bleed acid. That would be a good idea with the impregnated crew mates, though. It could give the player some interesting moral choices. It could have been something to twist the gameplay a bit later on in the game.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s too bad they didn’t have a huge fan of the franchise like me to help write the game. Or anyone who was.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Oh! I mistook the alien drool/resin for acid. Well, shit. Maybe if you attack the alien, but only harm it, then you’d have to worry about the acid at that point. Your first weapon is a blade of some sort, you hurt it, but then you gotta deal with the acid. At a later point in the game, you get the blowtorch, but until then, every weapon you use has a consequence you have to be mindful of.

  • fred

    I can’t imagine how pissed off the Youtube “fans” are right now.

  • Paulus Cañamonjas

    This game feels like Amnesia: Grunt in Space. And boring green terminals…What a wasted opportunity.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    absolutely. it’s the third epizode of the epic PreRec saga: “we hate the genre this game occupies so let’s shit on it using ignorance and hyperbole”.

  • Paulus Cañamonjas

    I missed a chase scene, Alien 3 style, closing doors behind you while the beast is trying to rape you. But no, it has to be cozy and retro. Fuck.

  • Daniel Bakke

    Completely agree with everything said in this review. Kind of pissed at RockPaperShotgun for recommending this horribly disappointing game.

  • fred

    I was convinced that Jack and Rich were real people until I saw that tripod.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    RockPaperShotgun is ran by a bunch of Social Justice Warrior who are paid off by sex and money. Why would you even trust them at all?

  • Furia Hardkur

    sometimes there is a pond of dropping something , and if u walk under u
    got jumped , but sometimes there are like 3 of these in one corridor ,
    and alien still run around 😉

  • Lional punsalot

    I happen to agree with most of what rich and jake were talking about in this episode. I would go a step further in describing the story as unoriginal and shamelessly ripped off from alien and aliens.

    spoilers:

    The first half of the game up to the apollo reveal is alien, one alien stalking all the humans, the robots killing humans. The apollo reveal moves us into aliens where a nest of aliens is in a reactor. then the end of the game, the docking clamp release is exactly the same mechanism as the destroy the ship device used at the end of the alien movie. And has the exact same effect, i mean why the hell would releasing the docking clamp send the station into destruction like that?

    When you couple this unoriginal story with completely boring game play (which the guys demonstrated adequately) what you have is an abomination of a game.

    I know anyone that sank 50 quid into this turd must feel a desire to defend their purchase but face it, this brought nothing but a lame ass ripped off predictable script.

    Everyone I know that has played the game was able to predict every last plot twist well ahead of time, sometimes right from the start of the god damned game (the company NEVER sends a team to investigate aliens without sending a synthetic for example).

  • “They had two hours worth of ideas, and they used every dirty little trick to make it longer.”

    So… Like the Hobbit films?

  • Glennn

    I know a ton of people on facebook constantly posting how excited they are to be playing this game, I don’t know who to believe anymore. Do you think they are just in denial and trying to convince themselves it wasn’t a waste of time and money?

  • Mr. R

    The last good Alien game was like 12 years ago when Monolith did AvP2. So for me this is the end of a big drought in quality, and they nailed the first movie’s tone instead of having more dumb space marine bullshit. It *is* too long, but only towards the end when there are way too many android sections. I didn’t get bored besides that.

  • Lional punsalot

    I have an answer to what would make a good alien game, you die, its over.

    That would add back in the tension that is missing here. There are no stakes to dying other than “oh ill have to go back to my last checkpoint and repeat the repetetive actions I already took”.

    Remove the checkpoints entirely and make the gameplay based around avoiding or fighting the alien in a more roguelike, more natural gameplay mode and it becomes a true survival horror game.

    Of course it wouldnt help alien isolation because all of the gameplay is based around an AI that passes right by you in the hallway because your are slightly off the to left or crouching behind a box.

    But I think any of you can take my idea and come up with a better game that this boring crap.

  • stryker1121

    Satire or is this the actual head of that stupid hashtag?

  • Lional punsalot

    There is nothing done with the acid blood in the entire game, it was too difficult to script.

  • Lional punsalot

    There is five minutes of this game where you will play and go “wow im playing a character in alien this is cool, look at how neat everything looks its just like alien i cant wait till shit gets started”, Then there’s another 19 hours of “really? i have to open another door and access another terminal to access another area so I can open more doors?

    Now if you had spent that much on a game for five minutes of actual enjoyment you would fight off any acceptance that the game sucked for as long as you possibly could so that you didn’t feel like you could have bought X amount of other things that could given you hours or days of entertainment.

    I have my money put squarely on denial.

  • Rich said “Insert slot A into slot B”. I think that’s called scissoring.

  • Lional punsalot

    I blame the other guy.

  • Lional punsalot

    mother??? MOTHER???? YOU BITCH *swings heavy metal thing into panel

  • Daniel Bakke

    If you’re referring to the retarded gamergate controversy, I think you’re confusing RPS with Kotaku?

    In my experience RPS has been very accurate, reliable and honest in their coverage and commentary, but regrettably with the occasional error such as with Isolation.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “retarded gamergate controversy” Oh, sugar, you’ve just made the biggest mistake in your life.

  • Lional punsalot

    Rich evans “im wearing panties” 2014

  • RedLetterRich

    ??? We’ve liked about half of the games we’ve played. Guacamelee, Risk of Rain, Invisible Inc. Then we kind of split on Mariokart 8, which Jack loved and I didn’t wasn’t completely thrilled about.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You guys need to be more like The Pissed Off Rage Nerd Who Plays Games and Gets Pissed Off

    http://youtu.be/WPAITAuuk-8

  • DisqusHound

    These guys are so off-point it’s nuts. If you want a real review of this game, check out Angry Joe on YouTube.

  • Playiing Alien Isolation, and I’m all like http://38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_levfoy0cD81qfvra2o1_400.gif

  • Alex Lee

    Alien: Isolation needs Shakma.

  • Mark Bisone

    For some reason I remember the Alien spitting acid in “Alien 3”. Maybe that was my date, though.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    If you want a good horror game, Rich, check out Five Nights At Freddy’s. I’m sure you probably won’t because it’ll bring back haunting memories

  • Lional punsalot

    That is disturbingly awkward.

  • Lional punsalot

    I cannot endorse your recommendation.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Are you afraid that a green mist will flow down your pants tonight, lucasfarts?

  • Silent Krabs

    The motion tracker can remove tension from the game, yeah. But, the game compensates by making so that if you use the motion tracker, the alien will hear you, and believe me, it will hear you if you use it. So, if you use the motion tracker, you’ll know where it is, but the alien will know where you are too, and by then it’s too late to do anything.

  • Lional punsalot

    Always, ever since that accident at the old pea factory.

  • Mugato1

    Is there only one alien in the game? That’s what the review made it look like. If so, that reminds me of the old Friday the 13th Nintendo game, where by definition there’s only one Jason, so for the whole game a whole lot of nothing happens and every once in a while Jason would show up, attack and leave. Repeat.

  • Silent Krabs

    You guys are really good film critics, but as video game critics, I can officially say you haven’t the slightest idea what you’re talking about. Not only do you come off as highly illogical and unobservant, but you guys are also very prejudiced and ignorant. I’m disappointed in you two.

  • Lional punsalot

    spoiler***

    No.

  • Nicolás FA

    People have different opinions, what a concept!

    Personally I loved the game. Had fun with it. I don’t mind the mini games at all and it is fun to try to avoid the alien/sintetics/humans. While the game is long, considering the modern state of videogames, in which 3 hours is commonplace, I really don’t mind a game which takes longer to finish.

    Regarding what they say about the alien, first off they are clearly playing on easy and even I never saw it pull the shit they put on the review.

    Anyone bitching about having to open doors clearly has gotten to used to shooters on rails ala CoD. This is something which exists since the early Dooms.

  • Mark Bisone

    I don’t know shit about the current crop of video games. The most modern system I own is the original Xbox, which I mainly use to watch porno movies.

    But I’m a big fan of Ridley’s Scott’s “Alien” movie, and always thought someone could eventually make a pretty good game out of it, just by setting the stage and the mood and then letting the monster and the characters all run loose, with the player resolving the situation in any way he saw fit. He could chase after it with rigged-up flamethrowers, try to flush it out airlocks, try to trap it in ventilation shafts or drop a giant chunk of ore on it, Loony Toons-style, etc. I figured the replay value would come from trying a different strategy each time, as well as from the protean nature of the threat and the shifting personal dynamics of your fellow crewmembers.

    What if Parker has a psychotic break and decides to sabotage the life support systems? What if Ash smuggles another egg aboard, or Brett gets turned into an egg (I *think* that’s what was happening in the deleted scene). What if the Alien starts systematically disabling the ship’s power systems, in an attempt to isolate its prey? If you just establish the rules and motivations and then set everything loose, you could have a fun game that changes every time you play it.

    When I saw TV ads for this, I figured they’d finally attempted something like that. With the current memory and processing power available, I think you could make a very fun game without having to script everything like a movie. It’s boring to sit around watching hybrid game-movies, or to be led by the nose, or down a set of train tracks.

  • Ogrot

    LOL. Please say that was meant to be ironic, because if it ain’t I’m really embarassed for you.

    On topic RPS seems to always just hype IP. Although I rarely take an opinion from one source anyway.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Wasn’t this made by the same people that made Aliens: Colonial Marines? No wonder this game is such a fuck up.

    The first Aliens vs. Predator game was alright, and that came out in 1999. The Alien campaign was a little weird, but the Predator and marine campaigns were short and sweet. Sure most of the scares were “jump scares”, but it also had some genuine moments of tension.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I was quoting Sin City, you ass.

  • Silent Krabs

    The people who made Alien: Isolation were the Creative Assembly. They’re known primarily for the Total War series. Colonial Marines was originally developed by Gearbox Software (the guys who made Borderlands) and then they outsourced it to a good five or six developers all of whom turned in a mediocre job.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Ah, ok. So I’m guessing Twentieth Century Fox is to blame for not paying close attention to what others are doing with the name of their franchise. Who am I kidding? The studio itself produced those two AvP movies. They don’t give a shit.

  • Will Cox

    I seriously wouldn’t listen to these guys. I enjoy them, but they don’t know what they are talking about. I absolutely love this game. It’s like Amnesia or Outlast in the Alien universe, and I loved both of those. It does send you chasing after a million ways to unlock doors, but it works. It’s a simple setup that forces you to exist in the same space as the alien while having a reason to move forward, and that’s all it needs most of the time.

  • omitted

    Well at least Jack got my character arc right.

  • Ogrot

    Ironically I was quoting some random fan when they heard all the changes EA was making to Sim City, sugar.

    Been awhile since Sin City so you’ll forgive the missed reference. Unless your talking about the sequel which I also already forgot completely about.

  • Gene Parmesan

    Personal preferences? You mean those things called opinions, those things no one is allowed to have anymore.

  • Taboo

    I rarely buy games these days, but I had to get this one. I can say it’s the best game I’ve played in a while.

  • Andrew Williams

    I won’t argue with the saryness factor of the alien, since that’s more personal than you’re other criticisms. This seems to be your main problem with the game, because if you were at least intimidated by the alien (like I and many others were) then you probably would’ve found the stealth gameplay more intense.

    However, I never encountered the phenomenon of “spawning aliens” that you guys
    did. The alien is ALWAYS where the motion tracker says it is and if
    it’s making noise in the vents and drops down it took a reasonable
    amount of time to do so. The AI was always fair to me and was a blast to outsmart on normal. The fun is derived from making sense of the seeming unpredictability of the alien, and also the humans who don’t always shoot on sight BTW.

    The one point on which we agree is the length. It actually would’ve benefited from being about half as long.

    Anyway, sorry you guys were bored by the game. Good thing pretty much no one else was. 😉

  • Lional punsalot

    I have made several points so far but I just want to make one devastating point clear.

    If I think of this game in terms of prometheus, my perspective is very much different than when I think of this game in terms of alien or aliens.

  • Gene Parmesan

    Rich when will you finally get it, loving colorful fun games doesn’t count for anything these days. The only way people will accept your opinions is if you validate the $60 they spent on bland garbage.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    They just share the same publisher, Sega, who has the rights to the Alien stuff on the video game front.

  • Thanatos2k

    You guys should play Clock Tower.

  • Gene Parmesan

    The most disappointing thing about the game to me was how lovely an atmosphere they were able to pull off, but there was just no thinking involved in playing. A game like Half Life pulled off the simplicity of “getting one thing to get to the next thing” because you had to figure it out yourself, you weren’t able to pull out a device that showed you where to go and what to do.

  • Why didn’t they give Nintendo the right to put a Xenomorph in the latest Smash Bros? I want to see a Facehugger on Mario.

  • Mark Bisone

    Actually, Dallas did have a motion tracker. Unfortunately for him, it consisted of Lambert looking at two dots on a screen and shrieking “Get out of there! Move, Dallas!” into his earpiece.

    So, you could probably recreate the tension of the first film by letting some offscreen character with access to better information scream instructions into your headset, forcing you to decipher what they’re babbling about in time to avoid the threat.

  • If only, if only. AAA video games are destined to be long, monotone hallways. We’ve got to make sure every single person gets the same experience out of it. It’s video game communism.

  • That’s right, Jay.

  • Guest

    which I believe made a ton of money as well 😛

  • dick_the_bday_boy

    “I’m wearing panties” – Rich Evans, Aliens: Wario Ware review (2014)

  • I’ve got to admit that Angry Joe puts more research into his stuff, but I’d rather listen to these guys any day of the week. Angry Joe lost all credibility to me after his slew of Man of Steel video uploads.

  • Gene Parmesan

    Not sure what you mean by “real review”. I just wanna see a couple of guys talk about what they thought of a game, not a pre-written script intercut with terribly unfunny skits.

  • Memoman

    Same here. I tried to give him some slack on account that Superman is clearly his hero. And even though I personally think Superman is a boring, lazily written character, I respected his passion. But it got stupidly absurd. I can no longer trust his judgement to remain objective. I like his angle on “protecting customers from scams” but once he gets passionate about a subject, you know that review is worthless.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Didn’t the other crew members have it and they told Dallas where it was via radio?

  • Gene Parmesan

    Great episode guys. Even though you’ve got a bad taste
    in your mouth for AAA games right now, you probably would have enjoyed Evil Within more. Good old fashioned RE4 pacing of action horror, sometimes
    it’s tense cause you’ve got hordes coming at you, and sometimes it
    brings it down and you’re terrified of what comes next. And it features
    some of the most wonderful and satisfying gore I’ve seen in a while.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That movie never happened

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Joes for me seems not that smart of a guy. He knows what he’s talking about when it comes to the game it self but everything else like movies or GamerGate Joe seems to be an idiot.

  • Memoman

    You know, guys and girls, reviews are valuable not because they tell you how to feel and how to think, but rather because they provide us with valuable information. Yet to get a reviews’ worth of nourishing data, you need first to understand that people have different interests they latch on when appreciating something.

    Then, with the newly acquired information, you get to use your own brain to weigh in all the knowledge you’ve received, and judge how the positives and negatives tally to your own specific taste and idiosyncrasy. You make the call. If you feel the criteria or opinions of a particular reviewer are way too out of sync with your own, then you can just stop listening to that reviewer. It’s so much painless to everyone involved when you internally come to accept that not everybody thinks the same way you do, and some people enjoy different aspects of any sort media.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    No, I specifically chose those words to avoid being called out on pissing on someone’s opinions. What I mean is that Rich and Jack have mentioned that they’re not fans of horror games. They have said that they get nothing out of them. It’s also very clear that they’re are what some may call “retro gamers”. They appreciate the old style of gameplay, especially Jack, who is known to not care for story and cutscenes in games. He just wants to jump straight into the meat of the game.

    Now, considering the things above, I can’t imagine them liking a horror game that heavily relies on recreating the movie’s atmosphere. They always criticize games based purely on gameplay, failing to ever mention sound design or any other merits a game may have. Basically what I’m saying is that they’re reviewing a game that isn’t directed at them in the first place, other than them being fans of the franchise.

    To me Jack and Rich just come off like guys who have been transported in time from their childhood to today and they’re all confused about how games have changed during that time.

  • Thanatos2k

    So the reason why critics appear to love this game is because after years of crap like Aliens Colonial Marines this is the TYPE of Alien game they want to support. Doesn’t matter whether the game is good or not, they must Support it because they approve of its direction.

    It’s exactly the type of corrupt game journalism that has led to our current state of the industry.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Pay attention, you asshole!

  • WrongWithYourFace

    So, kinda like RLM knows plenty about movies but don’t know what they’re doing when it comes to games?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Sorta yeah. This review is different because this is based off a movie property and they understand the movie.

  • Thanatos2k

    Oh good, you’re subjecting yourselves to the misery that is Zelda 2. Good luck claiming games are a “happy place” after playing that trash, Jack!

  • Thanatos2k

    Yes Rich, it is your destiny to play that game.

  • Thanatos2k

    You got fooled by the nostalgia. Part time.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Games “journalism”, which really doesn’t exist, is all about either hyping up a game or pointing a finger at the gaming community at people “journalists” view as wrong. I hate sites like Kotaku for doing that. Not only that their game reviews are shit, their community is full of selfish assholes, they talk about things like Sexy Star Fox Costume, and their anime coverage and reviews are terrible.

  • Thanatos2k

    There’s a reason RockPaperShotgun is on many people’s adblock lists.

  • Thanatos2k

    RockPaperShotgun is agenda driven and run by a unethical fucking idiot in John Walker.

  • Thanatos2k

    Angry Joe = 1 guy ranting about his opinion.

    Rich/Jack = 2 guys ranting about their opinion.

    Problem??

  • Lional punsalot

    Hey guys I just realized this goes onto you tube, and, hold on. They dont disable comments im going to read some of these quickly to see what people are saying.

    I hate this world, this is why we cant have nice things.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Comparing Half-Life with this Alien tie-in game: totally unfair. Half-LIfe was revolutionary, and might still be a contender for best FPS of all time. Mind you, is not my favorite, but I can’t deny its brilliance.

  • Thanatos2k

    Also Half Life didn’t try to use horror movie cliches like jump scares and locker hiding.

    Like that one level where you had to elude the giant monster on the train tracks. You knew it was there, you couldn’t do shit to it, and it was terrifying dashing across the middle to get to where you needed to go.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Why did they use the worst take???

  • Vengeful Eagle

    The best Alien game was and still is Alien Vs Predator 2 with the Alien Vs Predator Arcade Beat ’em up in a close second.

  • Vengeful Eagle

    Short Version: Very

  • Lional punsalot

    only a sith thinks in absolutes.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Well at least Rich is funny.Jack’s humor consists on putting shining text on the screen in post and nothing more.

  • Mark Bisone

    Yeah, that’s what I said. “Screaming Lambert” was his motion tracker.

  • Gene Parmesan

    Them not liking horror, and not focusing on it in their review is exactly why I think their feelings are very valid. They are not big horror fans, so focusing on the other aspects of gameplay was the only route that would make sense.

    While Alien Isolation nailed down the slower pacing atmosphere of classic survival horror, it completely failed in the “use your brain” areas, which I think is almost just as important. Resident Evil works as a game not only because the tone is great, but because it asked you to use your head and come up with solutions; and I’m sure that while Rich and Jack wouldn’t be taken in by the horror of RE they would definitely appreciate the puzzle solving.

    With this game, it becomes clear very quickly that other than the atmosphere, your brain will not be stimulated in any other way. So them not focusing on the horror aspects let them really zero in on the big problems of the game, which I think was very apt and fair. That said I wouldn’t base a purchase of the game on their review, but neither would I base a purchase of any $60 game on anything but my desire to play it.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You know what is the best Alien game? Dead Space. Dead Space is exactly what a game based on the license should be like. Mystery, good writing, it’s scary, and at every point you do not know when the necromorphs are coming from.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Go back to Kotaku, you asshole.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I love Dead Space but good writing?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=im_5QdHp04E

  • dollar store cashier wife

    uh have you played amnesia? you can get to the first scripted monster sequence 45 minutes into game.

  • Silent Krabs

    I still maintain that Dead Space is generic incarnate. Horror that consists of blood and gore, jump scare, blood and gore, jump scare, blood and gore jump scare. On top of that, its plot is a rip off of System Shock 2 (which Alien: Isolation also ripped off, admittedly) and what else? Aliens.

  • Gene Parmesan

    This is exactly whats going on. Every one has been saying that horror games should slow down, so as soon as someone makes an attempt at doing it the accolades are instant. Rich and Jack admittedly don’t give two fucks about the horror genre of games, and just review the game for what it is – mostly flawed. BTW I saw you giving Gamespot some shit on their Hatred article and had myself a chuckle.

  • Gene Parmesan

    I only used it as an example because everybody has been saying that Alien Isolation is a return to the good old days of survival horror, but when looking back you see how dumbed down the game is in comparison.

  • Steven Gibbs

    But are there spikes in the game?

  • Silent Krabs

    You do realize that when I say “prejudiced and ignorant” I mean in regards to games, right? I’m criticizing the fact that, for example, they dislike Sonic just because they’re not good at the game or the fact that Jack doesn’t care for story in games yet criticizes the game for having a crap story anyway (it does have a crap story, but that’s not the point).

    And I loathe Kotaku as much as the next guy, dibshit.

  • Gene Parmesan

    Goddammit Pheonix!

  • Charon

    Wasn’t that “door opening montage” filler too? -_-

  • Drain

    AvP 3 wasn’t bad either.

  • Gene Parmesan

    I know that I wanted to filler my ears with something during that montage.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I’m sorry. What I meant to say was; Go to back to tumblr, you asshole.

  • Guest

    Regarding the Alien AI, on hard mode it is relentlessly brutal (in a good way) and most of the examples shown in the video you wouldn’t get away with on hard. On this mode no place is safe for long. All the hiding places the Alien can and will get you, inside the vents, through the opening of a vent, in lockers, under beds & desks, while you are hacking/saving/climbing, when you make a noise (like from the motion tracker when close). I don’t think there has ever been a game like this to have the balls to make no hiding place safe (at least not safe for long).

    I think you guys mentioned that the game gives you no tools other than hiding but this isn’t true. There are tools for distracting & evading the Alien, even guiding him to attack other NPCs.

    I would recommend you guys try playing the survivor mode to see the full extent instantly. You may like the game in this mode as it’s straight to the point, you vs the Alien.

    In terms of the Alien not being scary, if you can, try playing with the Oculus Rift (in Survivor mode if you don’t feel like playing the campaign again). I’m like you in that I don’t find the Alien particularly scary anymore but with the Oculus Rift it’s a whole different ball game, it makes the Alien scary again. I’ve never had an experience like it before, with Oculus Rift I was truly terrified, I got a more realistic sense of the Alien’s towering scale over me.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Okay the second one had good writing.

  • Lional punsalot

    Wasn’t that a free video you just watched?

  • R_S_P

    Spot on parody of most Youtube video game personalities. That’s why I like PreRec so much they offer actual reasons with insight.

  • Drain

    So him giving his opinion is somehow better than them giving their opinion? Their review isn’t a “real” review because they didn’t get on their knees and blow the game like he did?

  • Paulus Cañamonjas

    What about alien trilogy? I loved that one.

  • Gene Parmesan

    For a second I thought of Doug Walker, then I realized you’re talking about the other terrible Walker. What is it with Walkers?

  • WrongWithYourFace

    You do have a point but a big problem with their criticism is that they said that they can’t feel intimidated about something they have nostalgia towards. Well, obviously the mini games and whatnot feel pointless if you don’t feel any tension at all while doing them. The point is to be doing these things under stress and if horror games do nothing to you, then sure, of course all the door opening will feel just tedious.

    And again, they clearly played on easy or something, where the AI is dumb as bag of puppies. Of course one could criticize the developers for making such a difficulty but that’s just to appeal for larger audiences. At least it’s possible to make the game difficult if you want.

    I wouldn’t really call this video a “review”, just two guys expressing their opinion, which is fine. One could argue that it makes the whole thing kind of pointless, though. The most I got out of this is that if I do happen to play the game, I should play it on a higher difficulty.

  • Yeah, I think that’s a problem with video games in general right now. It’s like the bar is so low for video games at the moment. If the video game has cinematics and is somewhat functional, it’ll get at least a few game of the year titles.

  • Steven Gibbs

    lol

  • David

    Whoop, I’m thinking of a different game then, I guess? What’s the one where you can’t see the monster like the entire game? Admittedly I have a hard time keeping track of which is which since I rarely play or even follow horror games – they generally make me shit my pants so I steer clear.

  • Charon

    Wasn’t that an obvious point you just made?

    See? It sounds stupid, even when you say it.

  • Silent Krabs

    You seem like a really nice guy.
    But seriously, I really don’t know what you’re problem is, but I’ll let you know now I hate Tumblr too. And Facebook, Twitter, and Reddit and I’m pro GamerGate. So please, can we go back to being assholes for fun and laughs and not for real?

  • Guest

    Ah yes, I can the the Youtube comments now…
    “OHMUHFUKINGWAD, ROPED OFF JAHNTRAN UNSUBSCRIBE!”

  • WrongWithYourFace

    What a fucking hipster!

  • Gene Parmesan

    Jack said they both played on normal, and I think if you’re playing a game for a review playing it on normal is the way to go because it should give you the game as it is meant to be played, and playing it on hard may present other problems for reviewing. If normal mode is dumbed down to the point of the game not being effective then that is a problem itself that the reviewers cannot be held accountable for.

    Also, introducing simple mechanics puzzles to later have them be put under the stress of having a monster chase you is a fine thing. But if that’s the only card the game has then it becomes repetitive and uninspired, which is what they said and I happen to agree.

  • Thanatos2k

    I still think AvP 1 is better than 2.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    eh.The concept of insanity has so much potential in a horror game but they made it so timid it was laughable.Giving Isaac a personality was a mistake as well because all he ended up being is a completely bland character.Still Dead Space delivers on every other aspect so greatly I don’t give a shit how they are written.

  • Thanatos2k

    They were doing like a thing

  • Charon

    What a story, Mark!

  • dollar store cashier wife

    The developers themselfs recommend playing the game on hard once you’re on the difficulty selection menu.

  • Matt

    “I’m wearing panties” – Rich Evans 10/10

  • WrongWithYourFace

    “A pre-written script intercut with terribly unfunny skits.”
    So that’s why they stopped making Gamestation 2.0.?

    Oh, my. My comments on this video make me look like a horrible RLM hater.

  • Gene Parmesan

    It’s rough when you get into difficulties for games, because there really is no standard for it. Most games they recommend you to play on Normal, but it turns out you should’ve played on hard because otherwise there is absolutely no challenge. But sometimes even hard is a breeze, and other times I’m tempted to move to easy on particularly frustrating sections of games. Either way I feel that when a game doesn’t offer an adequate experience on Normal its a flaw in the game.

  • mercianomad

    I’m in the weird position of agreeing with or seeing the validity of nearly everything they say and completely loving this game anyway.

    I’m into games mostly for escape factor, and I prefer them too long rather than too short. Short is for games I dislike, because I usually stop playing them anyway.

    If a game succeeds at atmosphere then I can tolerate a lot, including some of the nitpicky things that drive others bonkers, like not being able to move past a dinner tray on the floor as in this review, fetch quests, bad story etc. I do sometimes draw the line at bad voice acting, for some reason. But I like spending lots of time doing nothing but taking in the game world if it’s good, looking around, admiring the artistry of the production, appreciating worlds that are nothing like the shithole I live in. I don’t need constant action and variety and player autonomy and totally novel next new thing all the time gameplay, though I get into those things too if they work.

    But whoa Nelly, did I disagree with Rich about the game needing a stealth meter. Yeesh. Bad call. I’m no gaming god, but that’s just…no.

  • Gene Parmesan

    I actually thought of the same thing after posting it. Aside from Gamestation 2.0 having pretty funny skits (especially the satire on the “hot girl gamer”) I would say that I would still stand by that comparison. I much prefer two people casually talking about something than someone just reading off a script.

  • Dragoon

    So Alien: Isolation mastered SLE? Slow time events?

  • Charon

    Remember the puzzles in Silent Hill 2?

    FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

  • Charon

    “Happy Birthday Spray, I’m disappointed in you!” in bees on the wall.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    We were until you showed up.

  • Lional punsalot

    You are not allowed to have a nuanced opinion based on the unique perspective your life experiences gives you.

    You must either hate or love this game, if you love it you are a fanboy sucking at the tit of “insert company or individual name”, if you hate it your a moron jumping on the bandwagon.

    Chose one.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    What did I do?

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • WrongWithYourFace

    Okay, I missed that part about them playing on normal. And I agree that it’s a flaw in the game if a lower difficulty setting doesn’t manage to deliver the experience the developers were aiming for. I do wonder why, after realizing that the AI is shit, Jack and Rich didn’t think to crank up the difficulty and see if it makes it better. Then they could have made a valid point about the lower difficulties being flawed, instead of shitting on the whole game. Normal difficulty may be the “way to go” for a critic initially, but I think it’s also reasonable to expect them to at least try it on other difficulties, as well. Otherwise they can’t form a complete, honest opinion about the game.

    I can’t say how tedious the “puzzles” become, since I haven’t played the game but Jack and Rich don’t seem to be the type of people to feel the stress, which is because they’re not the target audience, so their judgement of how fast it really gets repetitive is flawed in a way. I’m all for more variety but I can’t take their word for it in this case. Oh, well, everyone should just find a critic who’s taste is close to their own. I’ve found that for movies in RLM, on the part of games, Pre-Rec just isn’t cutting it for me.

  • Charon

    So, lemme get this straight – a $200-$400 VR peripheral is necessary for the game to be enjoyable? I think I’ll pass, or get in on a Steam sale sometime down the road. Sir Jefferey, your logic of understanding those experiences in gameplay is not hyperbole – it’s just that the game is so awful you have to drop, when all is said and done, over $500 dollars worth of digitally-enhanced hope onto a steaming pile of shit.

    Piece of shit, walk away.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Will Shakma be just as huggably adorable as the Alien?

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    He has to be shocking audiences everywhere too

  • Lional punsalot

    spiderman always wins.

  • Charon

    Wait, wait… it’s “they were LIKE doing a thing.”

    Get it ryght.

  • DisqusHound

    Alien acid spit…you’re remembering the Kenner “Gorilla Alien” action figure had a small squeeze reservoir in the head. Fill it up with water and “spit” it on your other action figures.
    This feature didn’t make it into the movies until Alien Resurrection, but it only happened once and was done more as a shout-out to the toys.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Escaping Shakma would be too easy: just close the door or kill Mrs. Shakma, who’s on the other side.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Wait, then why did that one Alien kill the other so they could use its blood to escape?

  • Palpatine
  • DisqusHound

    Because he was an asshole.

  • Alex J. Withers

    So I recently found out (after playing for hours) that I worked with the voice actor for Diane Verlaine (Jane Perry) in a low-budget feature film – small world! Should be coming out soon I think, check it out https://www.facebook.com/AshesFeatureFilm

  • Lional punsalot

    Since when were you seduced by the neutral side palpy?

  • Palpatine

    I don’t give a flying fuck about video games and all the drama that seems to spawn from them. I play them sometimes, but I could really care less about all the arguing that people have over them.

  • Lional punsalot

    And the kids these days with their new fangled hair phones keep walking on my lawn with the doobin and the boppin and the pokeman with the rararara.

    I get your point I just felt like making people think of bill crosby for one moment.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Speaking of Star Wars and video games when the fuck are they gonna release KoTOR 3!?

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    Rich Evans: “I’m wearing panties.”

  • Jigsaw

    Wow, I never heard so much BS from you two guys. The game clearly didn’t work for you because you lack any ability to immerse yourself into the game world, to imagine what it must be like to be in that situation. An ability that is imperative to enjoy the game. If you can’t do that kind of one-person role-playing you should stay away from games like that and rather keep playing your flashy indie 2D platformers.

    Ironically, you blame the gaminess of Alien: Isolation’s game mechanics as one of the reasons that killed the horror aspect of the game for you, but then you demand an extremly gamey stealth gauge to make it better? Does not compute!

    The mini games aren’t supposed to be exciting on their own merrit. They are supposed to slow you down and make you fumble under stress while you could be disovered any time by an android or the alien. Works for me, but only because I have the ability to put myself into the mood of being in that situation. If you lack any sort of imagination, and your inner child is basically dead, it obviously won’t work. 😉

    And as for Alien AI glitches like suddenly coming at you from another direction with no real time to get there? Never happened to me in 16 hours.

    As for the length of game: It’s great! I can’t get enough of the Alien universe, the wonderful art design, the beautiful lighting, the music, the sound effects, the creepy androids and playing hide and seek with the alien. It’s simply a lot of fun to me and I will play it again from the start once I’ve finished it.

    The only point of yours that I agree with is the walking animation of the alien. That could really use an improvement, to make it more animalistic and graceful instead of making it look like velociraptor with oesteoporosis. But’s that’s a minor niggle in a game that I really love otherwise. It’s simply the best alien game ever made and more fun than a silly ADD game like Guacamelee! could ever be for me.

    This is Jigsaw, last survivor of this terrible episode of PreRec. Signing off…

  • Palpatine

    After Space Cop, and that comes out after the next Plinkett review.

  • Lional punsalot

    And so it was that the apocalypse came, not because of religion or politics, but because of a review made by two Americans about a video game called Alien isolation.

    The two sides began to form during the youtube comment section under the video, and quickly spread growing more belligerent and hyperbolic as time passed until the aspects of the game were no longer being discussed and instead people took to cutting off each others arms and beating each other to death in a ritualistic battle for survival.

    When the dust settled all that was left were too traumatized to participate in any social interaction including procreation, Leaving only pauly shaw and emma watson on an island in florida fighting for survival against their lack of food, roving bands of wild racoons and a crocodile with one eye missing.

  • Palpatine

    I can understand why gamers tend to argue over this kind of stuff, because it means a lot to them. But for me, it dosen’t really matter. I just get a good laugh out of all the arguing that goes on between them.

  • ChewySmokey

    People are praising it not for it’s “greatness”, but for it being better than the franchise’s 2 previous games.

    Like many people, I too was excited for this game. Then I watched Let’s Plays of it and figured I was better off saving my money, as the it was kind of a turn off that the Alien’s AI seemed a little too stupid to be any real threat, nor was the atmosphere all that scary to me (I am aware that watching and actually playing are different experiences, but like Rich said; it was nostalgic, not scary). Still gonna check it out, but not until the next steam summer sale.

  • Lional punsalot

    Im just happy having a place to state what I think occasionally.

  • Nuruhuine .

    I lost 21 minutes of my life, and i’m never gonna get them back.

    At first, i couldn’t quite pinpoint where that awkward feeling i had when i started to watch their video was coming from. Then i figured it out…
    The tall skinny bald dude with his dirty shirt and the short not-totally-awake fatty with his high pitch old lady laugh… trying to look smart on screen talking shit about a topic they don’t even understand.
    They look like an old uninteresting couple, having a discussion during breakfast, and laughing at each other’s jokes like it’s something funny.
    From the look of it, they most likely spent last night banging each other’s butt until they couldn’t walk straight anymore and tried to kill some time around the kitchen’s table in the morning.
    Is anyone out there really gonna believe any of the crap that comes out of their shit holes? I wonder…

    The comments they gave about the game… I can’t decide if it makes me want to lmfao, cry a sea of tears, or puke right on their face.

    Here are a few:

    “The game is about opening doors” part…
    Then what? Mario is about jumping on plateforms, CoD is about shooting stuff, Gran Turismo is about pushing “left” or “right” while following a road. And those games are said to be genre defining games. So what’s your point here?

    “The Alien didn’t see me?” part…
    Perhaps you shouldn’t play on easy douchebag… Probably the difficulty setting that suits you the best though.

    “The space station is full of people” part…
    It’s a fucking space STATION! HELLO??!! With probably several hundreds of people before the Alien messes everything up. What do you expect?!

    “Everyone of these people will shoot at you on sight, even though you’re an unarmed woman” part…
    Did these assholes ACTUALLY play the game??

    “it’s spawn time, now the Alien will execute search pattern A to (?) which means he goes around a thing, doubles back a little bit then goes around full circle and vanish” part…
    These guys have absolutely NO CLUE what they’re talking about.

    “They’ve ruined Alien” part…
    This is the best one. I was so speechless i stared at the screen with an open mouth for 10 sec.

    I finished the game twice, on normal and hard, and pretty much everything they talked about what utter crap!
    I mean, this shit is even worse than the IGN review of the game, if that’s even possible.

    And their fucking background music for crying out loud… What the hell is that crap? Elevator shit or something? As interesting to hear as their whole logorrhea.

  • Jigsaw

    Agreed. I know by now that their taste in games and mine couldn’t be farther apart if we tried. Games like Guacamelee or Super Mario Kart are my idea of everything that is wrong with gaming, while they love them. They think the same about games like Alien Isolation, while I love them. There is a complete disconnect. I watch PreRec episodes anyway, for their simple entertainment value, but this episode really hit home, so I had to say something. It’s almost as if they insulted my M.U.T.H.U.R. 😉

  • Lional punsalot

    Everybody sing along now
    we got a fanboy in da house
    everybody sing along now
    we got a fanboy up his ass
    so move along and slide the beat
    control the rythm and start again
    here comes a fanboy in his rage
    we got a fanboy in da house
    here comes a fanboy spewing shit
    we a got a fanboy up his ass

  • DisqusHound

    I wish i could upvote this more than once.

  • dude why did you stop?

  • keep fucking going…put that fatty in his place!

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I mean, when I butt fuck my friends until I can no longer stand straight, I need better things to come out of my shit hole during breakfast.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    At first, when I started reading this comment, I thought I was in for a long, insightful comment that people on this webzone sometimes tend to make. Then I saw him criticize Mr. Rich Evanses’ laugh and raised an eyebrow.
    Next followed a barrage of pointless rage and insults. At this point it was clear he was not from around these parts.

    Finally I got to the meat of the comment. Soon after I figured it out: this hateful stranger was not going to actually express his thoughts on why the things said in the video were flawed (Most of the part. Giving credit where credit is due), but instead repeatedly pointing out that they were indeed flawed, thus leaving but a taste of pointless rage in the mouths of anyone reading the comment.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    I don’t think the drama comes from vidya gaems it’s from these “reviews” that suck ass and the fact that anyone who calls that out becomes a fanboy of “insert game here”.Half in The Bag constantly reviews movies that can cause internet nerd hivemind uproar all the time yet you don’t see that shit over HiTB comment section.Maybe it’s because Mike and Jay actually know what they are talking about.

  • Lional punsalot

    I dont even know what I think anymore.

  • right, right of course.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Is this part of your 108 page response to their review of Alien Isolation?

  • Which is the exact reason I come to the internet…

  • RLMkeepitup

    he said this at the same moment I read your comment haha

  • WrongWithYourFace

    *Rebuttal. Check your facts!

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    At least they could be civil about the disagreement e.g. “This product I purchased is important to me, and your views on it are highly suspect.”

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Why did Disqus remove downvotes?!

  • RLMkeepitup

    I think Jack meant they ruined what made the Alien scary when he said that, not like they ruined the franchise by the game etc. but the rest of your points seem valid although you come off as butt hurt.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have prepared a 108 page rebuttal to your so called “review” of Alien: Isolation.

    Review of the review
    Part 1

    Before I get started let me answer that yes this is extremely geeky response to another person’s opinion on a video game. However I am here to discuss and dissect their obviously wrong views on this horror gem that is far superior to even the latest Resident Evil game, which was amazing.

    First let me remove the myth as to why people are praising this game. PEOPLE ARE NOT LIKING THIS GAME BECAUSE COLONIAL MARINES WAS TERRIBLE. Legitimate and honest websites like Kotaku, Rock Paper Shotgun, and Gamasutra have been praising this game not because the last game was garbage. They love it because of how highly original it is as to combining what works in the film Alien and other modern horror classics such as Resident Evil 6 and Amnesia. Also the idea that they were paid off by SEGA so that the game can sell copies. That has never happened in the gaming industry.

  • RLMkeepitup

    Isolation (one smart alien) seems like a 180 of colonial marines (dumb aliens everyone). Lol. Gotta give them credit for being faithful to the film and trying to avoid previous mistakes I suppose.

  • I. J. Thompson

    Wow. Extremely uncomfortable experience, watching two total losers trying to act like the coolest guys in town.

    Kinda breaks my heart, seeing shitty ‘actors’ tear apart so many other peoples’ good, hard work for the sake of ‘comedy’. And failing so utterly! I’m always up for a good-natured piss-take, but this amounts to little more than two twats in a room.

    And whoever mixed the sound in that video needs to give up the dream and go finish junior high.

  • Radinov

    This is the first negative review I’ve seen, which is interesting to me. I’m still going to try it out of curiosity, but not until it’s on steam sale.

    EDIT: I also think it’s really funny that these guys aren’t allowed to dislike something for their own reasons. Oh, video game fans.

  • Lional punsalot

    lol

  • Robby

    You think these comments are bad? They’ve got nothing on the horror at IGN, where it was given a 5.9/10.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Considering the way you and the annoying loathsome cunts who came here act it looks like you just started Junior High.

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    Damn you dick_the_bday_boy, and you beating me to the joke.

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    By real review he means his opinions regurgitated back at him, I’m guessing…er I mean…jus sayin.

  • RLMkeepitup

    The tone of this review is going to invite much criticism. The music didn’t fit the tone either / made it worse. It’s all opinions either way, but saying this game ruins games is probably going to light a match in the pants of folks who liked it. Happy reading 😮

  • Lional punsalot

    Are you suggesting that maybe they have exaggerated their opinion in order to create a controversial video which will gather many views and put them on the map?

    how very dare you.

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    Your shaming is becoming highly problematic, yes means yes!

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    They banged butts on the kitchen’s chable!

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    “Stick head in hole?” —-> yes (head cut off start over)

  • Jigsaw

    Funny enough: it reminds me of what Jay said about Prometheus haters on Half in the Bag:

    “It’s an incredibly well made movie. If you’re one of the people that gets that upset over this movie, you should probably stop watching movies.”

    Now replace all iterations of “movie(s)” with “game(s)”… 😉

  • Jigsaw

    They can dislike it, but “feeling insulted” by it? That’s ridiculous.

  • Jigsaw

    “Then I saw him criticize Mr. Rich Evanses’ laugh and raised an eyebrow”.

    He has a point, though. Rich laughs exactly like my grandma does, and I’m not even kidding. I was amazed the first time I heard him laugh.

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    “Would somebody close the fuckin door?” – your Mom

  • splimis

    Good Review. I shall take it into consideration while forming my own opinion.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    One thing both games seem to have in common: the xenomorph’s retarded AI. So there’s that.

  • Thanatos2k

    Dude, don’t question my Plinketisms. Phantom Menace review, “Now this is pod racing” Parrrrrrt 3.

  • Charles Patterson

    Eh. I was simply in awe for a good hour. The game is gorgeous and is like a fan service stroke throughout for anybody who enjoys the first two films. I very much enjoy this game, the review, not so much.

  • Flaw Filial

    Jesus, I wish that I played this game so that I could be enraged one way or the other.
    I feel so empty right now.

  • Seirvox

    I genuinely enjoy watching these videos, because these two deliver a viewpoint I haven’t seen from other reviewers.

    I’m so used to listening to other gamers and critics, it’s interesting to see the perspective of people who haven’t played a lot of modern games. These guys can make some decent points, even if I disagree with them most of the time.

    I’m not sure why Jack and Rich pushed themselves through a game they didn’t want to play; after all, some genres don’t fit well with certain gamers. I don’t think it would have changed their disposition for modern games either way.

    Keep on playing, you two. I want to to see how salty the people in the comments can get.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    This has to be the first time anyone has ever suggested that Rich Evans tries to act like the coolest guy in town.

    As great as Rich Evans is, he is never cool. He can’t even be cool about fire safety.

  • Nuruhuine .

    This is most likely it.
    Desperate people would do anything these days to get a bit of notoriety.

  • Thanatos2k

    But Thief IS a better stealth game than A:I

  • Zack Peterson

    I loved the editing of your Alien Isolation review video. That ending had me cracking up. Jack: “There… there, um. Like, I… I… I–” END.

  • Thanatos2k

    Dude, sometimes instead of feebly trying to pick apart the honest valid opinions of people, you should just say nothing.

    Better to be thought a fool than open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.

  • Thanatos2k

    It’s like sarcasm of sarcasm. My brain is collapsing in on itself.

  • Thanatos2k

    Dude, the game wasn’t that good.

  • Thanatos2k

    There’s plenty of negative reviews on metacritic. People pretending like no one dislikes this game is baffling.

  • Thanatos2k

    This game is the Prometheus of video games.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Uh, at least the people in the game kept their fucking space helmet on, just in case.

  • pliskin

    I usually don’t take them very seriously when it comes to games, but they actually assessed some pretty fair points. I had the impression they think this game is worse than Colonial Marines though…

  • pliskin

    They come up with the best endings in the entertainment business.

  • I’ll give you one guess who sent that shit in.

    @percygryce2:disqus , that’s who.

  • pliskin

    There is a limit to sarcasm, don’t call RE a survival horror.

  • As Ezra Pound once said, you know an idea is part of the culture when you get the quote wrong.

  • pliskin

    His laugh is the only reason to watch his videos.

  • The Ghost

    Guys, you’ve chosen not to fall in line with Metacritic. So obviously you’re just trying to get clicks, because if you say anything that deviates from the mean, you’re doing it to get attention. Don’t you know that this game won’t survive in the scaaaary wilderness unless each and every critic fawns over it?

  • Max Wylde

    Gotta say that, for the most part, I don’t entirely disagree with you guys on this game. However, I still like this game, because it was different. It was a good attempt to put the player into the Alien universe in a way that wasn’t like being a colonial marine or a Predator or whatever.

    Unlocking doors here and there was annoying, I agree. And having everyone in the game pretty much be hostile to you was also annoying. What I think the game could’ve benefited from was huge changes in scenery, going into different areas of the station that would’ve added to the story, added to the gameplay, and added to the realism in some way. One idea I had, dare I say, could’ve been taken right out of, sigh, Alien: Resurrection, where there was a whole area flooded with water. Or, having multiple ways of evacuating the station, or keeping the alien at bay reliably.

    Other than all you guys said, I still liked it because it was especially different and it was rather immersive enough. If it had multiple ways of solving problems and overcoming obstacles, I think it would have significant replay value.

  • DanceOfBirther

    True dat.

  • DanceOfBirther

    I think you mean Cosby as interpreted by Dan Castellaneta. However, (ironically? coincidently?) Cosby is becoming a caricature of himself.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOxoe37Uuq0

  • Nuruhuine .

    I feel the need to say i am no Alien Isolation fanboy by any mean.

    Now, CA folks did put a lot of heart in this game, and it can definitely be seen and felt at pretty much every corner of Sevastopol.

    I’m not saying that the game is without flaws, it does have flaws: it is too long for its own good, the Alien patrolling and staying in the same area forever like it has a sixth sense and knows Ripley is there (for obvious gameplay reasons though), or the Alien never walking on four legs or never crawling on the ceiling, or the main character not being able to jump or even stride over some stuff laying on the floor…
    So yes, the game does indeed have some design flaws.

    But no one can deny it is a superb effort to try and recreate the original universe and atmosphere from the 1st Alien movie that we all know and love. Especially considering CA is foremost an RTS developper. (whilst Gearbox Software, a developper known for its highly successful Borderlands franchise, completely destroyed Aliens Colonial Marines, a game which “plot” (lol…) is supposed to be canon in the Alien universe!…)

    I’m not one for giving games a score. Obviously, enjoying (or not) a game is a very subjective experience and a score may not really be representative of how the vast majority of people feels towards the game. However, pretty much every gamer around the web agrees the game has impressive graphics, an engaging and creepy atmosphere, outstanding sound effects and musics, an intriguing plot directly tied to the 1st movie, nice gameplay mechanics, and last but not least: the much advertised “unpredictable Alien AI” that totally works.

    I know for a fact that it works because unlike these 2 sweaty assholes, i beat the game twice on both normal and hard. I could see and feel the differences. I could actually toy around with the Alien AI countless times and note on several occurences that the Xeno “learns” from the player’s actions and adapts to them. Truly, it is something rare enough in the industry to deserve high praise, even if it’s not perfect.

    And to watch these 2 cunts complain and talk so much shit in such a patronizing tone, probably just to get more views, drives me nuts beyond limits.

    The uttermost lack of respect displayed in their attitude towards the work done and the dedication to make this game is certainly what enrages me the most.

    I would have been totally fine with them voicing their opinions if it wasn’t done in such a haughty and disrespectful tone.

  • Old Ben

    I forgot all about that game. It had such great atmosphere. I had a great time when I bought Clock Tower and Tecmo’s Deception on the same night.
    http://youtu.be/KjLbsBoB6XU

  • Nuruhuine .

    As a learner of the English language that i enjoy so much, i shall take good note of that saying and remember it for future uses.
    Many thanks.

  • You should probably just go back to shitting on the fat one…

  • Nuruhuine .

    Let’s see…
    There: “Better to be thought a fool than open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.”
    I think it suits your comment pretty well.

    All credits go to Thanatos2k.

  • Junkie

    What a terrible, myopic, and condescending review. To call a game crafted by a clearly passionate group of developers wishing to make the most authentic Alien experience possible “the death of an art form” and “insulting” is ignorant and absurd. Not liking the game is one thing, but to bash it and deride it as if it is some soulless “safe” cash grab like a Call of Duty title is baffling to me. Go home, AIDSMoby.

  • Nuruhuine .

    My point, precisely.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Welcome back.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    People like you are the most annoying. You’re no different than this dumb ass kid.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZeZxQ9umWM

  • lucid_flux

    Best space station survival horror game I ever played is System Shock 2. It’s funny but this game just seems like a really dumbed down stripped down version of SS2 but tonally were trying to achieve the same thing as SS2.

    For example the hacking of doors was something you can do in SS2 although the game wasn’t limited to just hacking doors. In SS2 you could chose your play style by either playing stealthy and hacking security systems and door to avoid enemies, or you could just go full Rambo and get to you destination through fighting.

    Also the waking up to a crisis was something that happened in SS2, but what made SS2 exciting is that you woke up and really didn’t know what was happening to the ship. In this game you know that there is an alien on the ship and you know everything about the alien which really doesn’t lead to any surprise or the feeling of unraveling a mystery. In SS2 you woke up to the ship in chaos and you are really 100% alone, you don’t meet any other living person in SS2 and the story is further through audio logs you find around the ship or near dead crew members. But what make the game an excellent horror is the unknown not the blood. SS2 is a perfect example of this because the story is always a step ahead of you and while you are trying to survive you are also trying to understand more about the mysterious enemy on the ship and what lead to the supposed death of the entire crew.

    In conclusion if any of you want to play a real good horror space station game, go play System Shock 2. It’s a classic that inspired Portal and Bioshock and the horror genra in general.

  • I never expected so many people needed to have their purchase validated by the Pre-Rec crew. Wow. They could shit on my favorite games ever and I wouldn’t really care because the only thing that matters to me is that I enjoyed them. I might even have to concede that – gasp – even my favorite games have issues that might bug some people! Oh no!

    Also, they did not go into this review wanting to dislike the game. Jack expressed a lot of interest in playing it before it was out. I think they raised plenty of valid reasons for why they didn’t enjoy their time with it. Maybe they were a bit hyperbolic in calling it “the death of an art form” but so are the so-called “professional” reviews where they hype the shit out of AAA games that are mediocre at best.

  • Sully

    …and most of’em smell like shit.”

  • David Anderson

    What do I care how much effort they put into it if it’s not a good game?

  • Considering RLM is very popular already I don’t think they’re desperate for notoriety.

  • Otto T

    Makes me wonder what they thought of Amnesia ….

  • Credit for what?

    …actually you know what…i don’t even care…i am an idiot, you fucking got me.

  • Lional punsalot

    your inability to detect sarcasm is disturbing.

  • Nuruhuine .

    … says the all eloquent wizard chick.

    Didn’t bother watching that video you linked. Already wasted 21 minutes of my time with the 2 other idiots, that’s enough for today. And quite honestly, you reek of the same condescending and ignorant attitude. You reek of shit.
    So, is that supposed to replace any argument to prove your “you’re no different than this dumb ass kid.” point btw?

    Wizard phoenix my arse. Fucking nuggets material is more like it.

  • Palpatine

    Just be glad you didn’t live in my galaxy when I was emperor. Anyone who said anything negative about me, or the Empire would be executed.

  • Otto T

    I think blaming the consumers makes more sense then blaming people who advertise for the game….

  • Considering they both praised the art direction and retro-future authenticity, it shows they were prepared to enjoy the game if it lived up to the visuals. If all you care about is the graphics and franchise authenticity, fine, but some people need the actual game play to live up to the same standards.

  • I get the feeling that a lot of the praise from this game comes from people simply comparing it to the previous Alien games. That’s not a very high bar to surpass…

  • Lional punsalot

    they found it forgettable.

  • Ogrot

    Thanatos is quoting Lincoln. You know, the bearded guy that freed the slaves. You might have missed it. It was during a little historical event you might of heard about… a little event called WORLD WAR II!

  • Nuruhuine .

    Awww come on. If you played the game you certainly know the gameplay isn’t bad by any mean. and so do they. As a matter of fact, it’s actually quite good, even if there’s indeed a shit ton of doors to unlock during the course of the campaign and it can be annoying at times.
    There was no need for all that trash talk on their part.

  • Otto T

    But it’s not a movie made over 30 years ago….

  • Noah R.

    I would make a reasonable comment but I lost all hope in a decent response once I scrolled my mouse one time down the page….

    http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view6/20140201/4967957/monty-python-run-away-o.gif

    To be fair though, I think a lot of criticisms here are valid, you two just need to focus more on the positives of games you play- there is nothing wrong with disliking a game but point out more things it does well!

  • Ogrot

    Wait so there’s a part where a cowardly biologist sees a strange alien penis and decides to stick his face in it?

  • If you think they’re a cynical bunch watch their live stream of Octodad.

  • Nuruhuine .

    Thanks for sharing mate, that point totally eluded me.
    As for World War 2, i most likely know more of it than you ever would. Some of my relatives had a make a “quick stop” by those concentration camps, you know.
    It wasn’t all rainbows and sunshines.

  • Calling someone AIDSMoby is a surefire way to get us normal people on your side of the argument.

  • Ogrot

    No they did not say this game specifically ruins games. They were talking about the AAA model of high production values, art style over substance, and low difficulty threshold for mass appeal in general. And this being yet another flawed iteration of that business model.

  • ElectricPrism

    Best space station survival horror game I ever played is System Shock 2.
    It’s funny but this game just seems like a really dumbed down stripped
    down version of SS2 but tonally were trying to achieve the same thing as
    SS2.

    For example the hacking of doors was something you can do
    in SS2 although the game wasn’t limited to just hacking doors. In SS2
    you could chose your play style by either playing stealthy and hacking
    security systems and door to avoid enemies, or you could just go full
    Rambo and get to you destination through fighting.

    Also the waking up to a crisis was something that happened in SS2, but what made
    SS2 exciting is that you woke up and really didn’t know what was
    happening to the ship. In this game you know that there is an alien on
    the ship and you know everything about the alien which really doesn’t
    lead to any surprise or the feeling of unraveling a mystery. In SS2 you
    woke up to the ship in chaos and you are really 100% alone, you don’t
    meet any other living person in SS2 and the story is further through
    audio logs you find around the ship or near dead crew members. But what
    make the game an excellent horror is the unknown not the blood. SS2 is a
    perfect example of this because the story is always a step ahead of you
    and while you are trying to survive you are also trying to understand
    more about the mysterious enemy on the ship and what lead to the
    supposed death of the entire crew.

    In conclusion if any of you want to play a real good horror space station game with a really smart story, go play System Shock 2. It’s a classic that inspired Portal and Bioshock and the horror genera in general.

    Besides SHODAN is the most evil computer I’ve ever seen in media even toping GladOS and Hal.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOFZ5fv_pb8

  • Red 6

    Not really surprised that they call this game an “insult” after they earlier deemed Sonic “overrated”.

    Why do they even review games if Jack clearly prefers the simple run and gun action genre?

    Pre-Rec gets worse and worse with each failed episode.

  • Junkie

    Calling Alien: Isolation the “death of an art form” is a surefire way to get anybody who knows even an iota about video games to give no authoritative weight to your opinion on them.

  • Noah R.

    Exactly!

  • Red 6

    What was with the shitty dubstep music in the middle of the video? Is this the kind of crap Jack listens to?

    If I want to hear dubstep I can just watch no scope videos on youtube made by 13 year olds.

  • Ogrot

    OH YEAH! I BET I KNOW MORE ABOUT WAR 2 WORLD THAN U DUDE! I WAS A CHIMINEY SWEEP IN AUSCHWITZ! MY DAD GOT ME THE JOB!

  • Noah R.

    I narrowly escaped, I won’t be returning anytime soon. This site is so much… purer (until all the normally dormant viewers show up just to hate).

  • Nuruhuine .

    So Alien Isolation is “the death of an art form” and Amnesia is “forgettable”. lol
    Who knows, perhaps survival horror or survival simulation aren’t their cup of tea.

    How about Rapelay? I’m sure they’d love to review that one. If it’s not already done in their basement… Probably more akin to their tastes. I’m confident they have all the prerequisites and necessary skills to fully grasp the whole complexity of the story as well as the finely tuned elements of the gameplay.

  • Nuruhuine .

    lmao.

  • Noah R.

    It was obviously meant to parody the exact kind of videos you were talking about… All of your comments on this site seem to be negative, maybe you should watch something else if other people opinions bother you this much.

  • Ogrot

    THAT’S NOT FUNNY PEOPLE DIED TRYING TO KEEP THE CAMP WARM!

  • Theirs was a funny statement meant to highlight the problematic “graphics over gameplay” mentality of AAA game development. Yours was an infantile personal attack.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    Really? You’re insulting my user name? You’ve ran out of points to make in your arguments so now you need to insult my username? Why? Is it because of Joaquin Phoenix? What’s wrong with Joaquin Phoenix? Is it the Wizard part? That’s just the nickname I got as a teen working on set for a commercial, so what’s wrong with that? So if it wasn’t obvious before I am a male. What made you assume I was a woman, british asshole man?

  • Red 6

    I’m glad you’re reading all my other comments, I love getting new fans.

  • Lional punsalot

    This guy, he cant even see obvious jokes, can i keep him?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s a joke, you fucking idiot.

  • Nuruhuine .

    OHHH BUT IT IS LOLOL
    TOOBAD DERE’S NONE OF ‘EM LEFT, I CANT TOSS YO MUMMY & DADDY IN FOR SOME EXTRA WARMTH x((

    Geez, some people should clearly be forbidden to procreate.
    (talking about your breeders in case you didn’t catch it, which wouldn’t surprise me)

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Junkie

    If by “graphics over gameplay” you mean dedicated, painstaking, and meticulous recreation of all of Alien’s sets and assets. (http://www.pcgamer.com/how-authentic-is-alien-isolation/ shows some great comparisons)

    Just because these two did not like the gameplay does not imply it was an afterthought. This game could’ve easily been slapped together as a safe cash-in FPS, but the developers deliberately chose a style of gameplay that would prove controversial, as we can see from the widely polarized metacritic scores this game has received.

    I think you’re ultimately missing my point in that I do not mind that Jack and Rich did not enjoy this game. I mind that they are trying to lump it in with all of the Call of Duty’s and Medal of Honor’s out there, as if this game was put together by a team of suits and not a passionate group of die-hard Alien fans. They’re trying to make a point and ultimately showing their inexperience with the medium as a result.

  • Junkie

    Yeah, them spending 20 minutes shitting on the game in the most arrogant way possible is clearly a joke.

  • Ogrot

    THOSE ARROGANT BASTARDS SOMEONE NEEDS TO STOP THEM! BEFORE THEIR UNEARNED SMUGNESS TRAPS US IN A NEVERENDING RAGE CYCLE!

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Junkie

    Do you ride Rich and Jack’s dicks for free or do you get a cut of the Patreon money or something?

  • fred

    The second one was boring as fuck, even with Benedict Cumberbitch as Smoog.

  • Nuruhuine .

    Tsss, you got the wrong one wizard chick. Geez, so much for letting you sort out the photos…
    This one is the photo of your mother. You know, after she got drunk at the local bar and dick squashed by the whole neighborhood.

    Oh but wait!… Now that explains everything about your asswipe face lol.

  • blau

    Just some quick points. You didn’t mention what setting you played it on. The game is pretty difficult on the harder levels. Did you try survival mode? The alien actively hunts you on that mode.

    You mentioned that they ruined what made the alien scary, but then also pointed out there have been six movies. You are correct. The alien is a cultural icon at this point. It would be stupid to try and hide it in shadow or not reveal it because everyone knows what it is. We’ve all seen it at this point. You can’t build suspense around a known thing. This is the same reason why reboots of Freddy, Jason, and Michale Myers didn’t work. We know them and trying to make them scary isn’t going to work.

    That being said, from an opposite point of view, I teach middle school students and none of them have ever seen any of the alien movies. While they know what the alien is (due to cinema culture,as I mentioned), this is really their first exposure to it. They all loved it and thought that the alien was really cool. So while it may not appeal to us older folks who have been there since the beginning, it is turning a whole new audience on to the alien universe in a way that Prometheus totally failed to do. I think that is great. To paraphrase someone you may know, “This game wasn’t made for us fans. It was made for the popcorn eating masses. As such it needed to appeal to people who weren’t fans.”

  • Ogrot

    CLOSE! I AM RICH’S DICK AND JACK’S ANUS IS MY MISTRESS!

  • Nuruhuine .

    I’m not british, dickweed.
    Besides, does it look like i give a rat’s ass about how you got that name?
    No, i thought so.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    At least I have one. What’s wrong with my face anyways?

    http://static.wixstatic.com/media/ad3415_6852fcb5b8de4197975809aa93d2e560.jpg

  • Nuruhuine .

    lol, you crack me up wizard chick.
    honest here, you really do.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I asked you questions, mister I Am Come From A Land Down Under. Answer them. Give me some legitimacy to what the fuck you’re saying.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    How so? I ain’t using my real face so I’m using my celebrity look a like. Stop calling me “Wizard Chick.” Why do you call me that? Is it a fucking british thing? I’m not a woman.

  • Ogrot

    THANKS FOR EXPLAINING IT TO ME DUDE! WHY DON’T YOU DROP SOME WORLD WAR II FACTS AND ASSERT YOUR DOMINANCE ON THE SUBJECT! I BET I KNOW MORE THAN U!

  • Ogrot

    U JUST JEALOUS CUZ I KNOW MORE ABOUT WORLD WAR 2 THAN U!

  • Sully

    You can always tell when someone is new to RLM.

    https://thepumpkinshead.files.wordpress.com/2014/09/smdh.gif

  • Sully

    I think she means *chic*.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Hopefully they’ll never come back, my foxy friend.

  • Ogrot

    Hey don’t say that about my new best friend. He’s adorable. We’re gonna have a World War II knowledge throw down!

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    Damn it, Ogrot! You can’t…you can’t love him.

  • Jessey Bowman

    These guys are just very critical and impatient with a game that – for what it is – is quite decent. If they want to act like they’re “too good” to let themselves be entertained by what the game has to offer them, more power to ’em.

    But /every/ “horror” game only works if you allow yourself to buy into the fact that some moving pictures on the screen are scary. If you don’t want to let yourself feel tense, or stressed, or startled ; don’t bother playing the game in the first place. ‘Cause it won’t magically make you feel what you’re actively resisting to feel.

  • Ogrot

    I shall awkwardly paw at his hair! And leer at him through windows!

  • Sully

    Being a wizard automatically raises one to chic status.

  • Lional punsalot

    How dare they be critical of something they didn’t enjoy.

    What they should have done is praise the ever loving shit out of a game they didn’t enjoy because, “for what it is” this game should be sung about from roof tops, “for what it is” this game should be compared to worse games, “for what it is” you shouldn’t care that the gameplay of a game is shit as long as it looks pretty, “for what it is” you should just be happy they made something, “for what it is” at least it didnt desecrate my grandparents graves, “for what it is” it still didnt leave a rash like that STD.

    I think you should have realized the flaw in your statement by this point, the game is a AAA title being called great and fantastic when it is seriously flawed, boring and predictable. You might be willing to forgive its flaws but not everyone is so willing.

    Live with the fact that people have opinions other than those you hold.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Hank_Henshaw

    Amnesia is “forgettable” because amnesia, forget, can’t remember, etc. You know what I mean? Jack and Rich have never reviewed Amnesia (to my knowledge). Lucasfarts was just doing like a thing there.

  • Junkie

    Nobody told me they were making a Phil Fish biopic starring Joaquin Phoenix.

  • Mark Bisone

    I’ve seen people play these sorts of games, and have played a few myself. I get what those designers are trying to do with them, and respect the kind of craft that goes into the peripheral bells and whistles (the graphics, the sound design, etc). They want to curate memorable moments like a filmmaker does for an audience. But cinema will always do that better. I guess I think video games should play to their strengths rather than strive to be inferior half-films.

  • Sully
  • ChrisWyble(wz3d)

    hahahahaha… This kid is hilarious. From way across the internet, anyway, where I can shut him off when I want. He definitely learned the word, “frick” last week and is working on making it his. Poor guy. He’s gonna be really embarrassed by this one day.
    As far as Nuruhuine goes… Dude, you’re on the wrong site if you’re looking for respect to the game creators or bowing down to the source materials. They could be best friends with the creators. If they thought the game sucked, they’d still say it the same way. This is how they do it. Go make your respectful video and slap it up on your website and warn all your viewers about the evils of Jack & Rich. Myself, I’m the kind of asshole who tends to laugh every time they open their stupid, disrespectful mouths. They could be talking shit on MY art and I’d giddily high-five the nearest person like I had just won the lottery.

  • Saruma

    So either you are supposed to like a game or you are basically a snob that feels too good for it?

  • Paulus Cañamonjas

    I love how nobody mentions the crafting system.

  • Dammit Google

    Hey, all right, a mention of The IF: The Dark Project! Whoohoooo! Yeah, playing that game first changes how one approaches or expects stealth in other games. :p

  • Guest

    MST3K reference!

  • Eric Monaghan

    oh, pouring your heart and soul into a piece of art exempts it from criticism? shiiiiiiit. If the vast majority of critics loved a film and I went to go see it with high hopes, only to be bored for 2 hours and ultimately disappointed, I might want to warn my friends about it. That’s all this is, bud. With a flare of comedy. Time to relax.

  • Junkie

    I always thought the RLM community had a higher average level of intelligence than most, but it seems you guys are proving me wrong here by your consistent inability to grasp my point. I don’t care that they didn’t like the game. They’re entitled to their opinion. Isolation is not exempt from criticism and it is most certainly NOT a perfect game. What I have a problem with is Jack and Rich scorning the game as if it is some wretched example of a “AAA” title, as if most publishers would even dare step within 100 feet of a game like this. It is baffling how two people so out of touch with the industry can have a platform to speak from.

  • majordisaster

    What difficulty did RLM play it on? All I can tell you is that on Survivor(which is what the game recommends you to play on if you want a tense experience, which is what I really felt like I had), I used lockers successfully maybe four times in the entire game, they felt like deathtraps that just got you killed the rest of the time. That might be your problem there.

  • mmp

    It’s just a joke. Relax, man.

  • Michael Coates

    I love watching the movie reviews because they clearly come from a perspective of experience regarding movie making and film in general. I’m consistently impressed with the knowledge of everyone involved in Half in the Bag and Best of the Worst. With Previously Recorded I’ve only ever been disappointed.

    Maybe it’s because video games are a medium that only come to life in the hands of a player, and who that player is has a crazy impact on the experience that player will have. From all the episodes of PR I’ve seen, I guess I just don’t see the same level of love for games come out that I see for movies in HitB and BotW.

  • David

    Why do you care so much about “Passionate and Hard Working Developers”? I’m sure the guys over at Sledgehammer Games & Treyarch are passionate as fuck about making every COD sequel they create. I’m sure they try their utmost hardest to create an enjoyable and interesting experience considering the boundaries that might be placed upon them. Ultimately, they’re terrible games, and that’s the crux of the issue.
    I don’t care how much “Passion” Peter Jackson has for the new Hobbit Films, they’re just not good movies, case and point. You can have all the passion in the world but if you don’t succeed, it means nothing.

    Are you part of the Development team and feel personally insulted by Rich & Jack? Why do you care so much about the opinion of these 2 random guys on the internet and what they personally feel is an “insulting” game?
    Seriously, understand just how absurd YOU sound.

  • Rupuka

    This is exactly the kind of games lot of publishers aim for, a “cinematic experience” in which gameplay is an afterthought, which is also everything wrong with video games as their own “art form”, trying to be things they aren’t.

  • Spraynard kruger

    Rich, my mentor, it’s not that! Here’s how I view this.

    When Mike lashes out at something like Jeff Who Lives At Home because of how cynically lazy, drab, and depressingly monotonous it is, it makes sense because the Duplass brothers are fucking hack fraud motherfuckers!

    But with Alien Isolation, there was real talent involved! Actual heart was put into the game. 300 artists got together and tried to make an accurate representation of Alien. And then this review calls it “The death of an art form”? And “insulting”? If anything, this review is insulting to the people who bent over backwards to make this game a success both stylistically and critically. Aliens Colonial Marines was such a colossal flop and angered so many people. Can you imagine trying to rebuild after that? That’s like, I don’t know, the Star Wars Prequels? But only with a time frame of only a year?

    It seems disrespectful to be so vindictive over something like this. Mike treats fucking George Lucas with less contempt. I understand your opinion and can totally get where you guys are coming from, but this review is chastising.

  • Spraynard kruger

    I haven’t done very well in school this year.

  • bb-15

    Enjoyable review.
    Some people have written that Jack and Rich should have played the game on Survivor. I don’t think that would have mattered.
    * I expected that Jack and Rich wouldn’t like Alien: Isolation.
    They often play arcade types of games on their show.
    Alien Isolation is very different from that.
    It is in the style of being immersed in the games’s “world” and having to GRIND to get around or accomplish tasks.
    Anyone who regularly plays Blizzard games or Guild Wars would accept that kind of game play.

  • Gene Parmesan

    I just want to keep a record of this incredible Youtube comment here:

    “The Alien dosnt have eye sight you dumb fat, skinny fucks.
    Its pure instince. Look crocodile brain, like lion brain.

    Dont play the game. Uninstall it you boring twats. Dont dont about stuff you dont like.
    Do you know lessons of life? talk about stuff you do like. Twats.”

  • nocussing

    Yes but once you figure out those set pieces it’s just go from obvious hiding spot A to obvious hiding spot B and hope the AI doesn’t cheat.

  • Ibexfather

    This is the real world where the big boys play. If a developer makes a game, some people will call them soulless hacks, whether they tried, took risks, etc. Effort is subjective.
    Instead of trying to shield a developer from the supposed radioactive criticism-waves from one video on the internet, maybe you should calm down. Calling it the death of games was a joke, a hyperbole.
    By continuing to post personal attacks against people here, you aren’t proving that Jack and Rich’s point is wrong, which you can’t anyway, because it’s not a point, it’s a joke to end a review on. You’re just proving more and more that you tie your personal feelings into two peoples’ opinion of a video game.

  • Ibexfather

    This right here, your post, is the problem with the internet. Communication lockdown. A presumptuous attitude about other people’s intentions.
    First of all, of course they show a lack of respect for the work done on the game. They didn’t like the game. If you don’t like something, it means you don’t respect the results of the efforts. You can acknowledge the effort if you want, but it doesn’t mean they have to “respect” it to somehow have a valid opinion on the work itself. Basically, you claiming they lacked respect is just a tricky way of saying they should have liked it more, and it’s fooling no one, apart from other hate-mongers.
    Then there’s the assumption that they’re using a “patronizing tone, probably just to get more views”. Is that how it works? To get more views, you should be patronizing? Interesting. Did you read that sentence before you posted? Because it makes no sense at all.
    Yes they have a certain attitude toward things when they don’t like them. You call it patronizing, I can’t really agree or disagree, I just see it as them being them.
    Basically, you know the game has problems, agree with them on that, but can’t handle that they had a more negative reaction to them. It’s a disease all over the internet. You have a problem where you see someone else reacting negatively to something, and you decide that they are somehow manipulating a system, or being patronizing, or something, anything. You’re grasping at straws, whatever it takes to discredit the mean guys who hurt your feelings.
    Why don’t you just take a deep breath and decide that you don’t care what they think, instead of calling them cunts. You aren’t doing your reputation or social development any favors.

  • Ibexfather

    You’re being ridiculous now. Jack and Rich surely know that the gameplay is good? You can’t know an opinion. You can agree or disagree with an opinion. I’m not trying to insult you, I’m trying to be helpful and tell you, this isn’t productive.

  • Ibexfather

    I’m getting that feeling as well, the “at least it’s not___” glasses.

  • Ibexfather

    Ouch

  • Palpatine

    I read that comment in Plinkett’s voice, and it sounded hilarious.

  • Pete Zarrol

    I’m a fan of Noah R.

  • Palpatine

    That guy looks like Josh.

  • Pete Zarrol

    Nice review. To be honest, even after watching the review I wouldn’t rule out buying the game – maybe second hand, tho…
    On a film-making note, Jack’s framing seemed a little off – he was dead centre with loads of, um, dead space to his left. Nice touch with the Nukie poster, tho. Also, the sound editing is a bit weird, almost like they recorded their parts separately (which of course they didn’t).
    Anyway, overall good stuff. Thanks guys.

  • Malevolence

    Dear fucking God… this is your review? Sometimes you have to try in a video game. Haven’t you heard of ambience? Especially in a survival horror title? If you don’t have to work to survive in one, you might as well play a game where you can take 20 bullets to the face and still trudge forward…. you guys really disappointed me this time. Game Mechanics- Combat, Crafting, Stealth, puzzle solving…. do you need more? If so, how many do you need? The “Warioware” is like .1 percent of the gameplay if that. You both strike me as instant gratification gamers who really shouldn’t review a game like this, or SIlent Hill, or pretty much any game that doesn’t give you an overall point score and feel you’re doing a disservice to your fans who are on the fence about this game, or even games like this you may review in the future

  • RedLetterRich

    I never said said anything about the difficulty or sucking up bullets, what I said was I’m not a fan of the way they went about stealth in this game, that does not mean I wanted to shoot things or soak up bullets to the face.

    As far as ambience, one of my complaints about the game is the complete lack of the moody and foreboding atmosphere needed in order to create “horror” there’s plenty of nostalgia, but never a sense of doom (for reasons I go into in the video) So instead of tension and a feeling of dread when hiding from the alien or androids what I felt was just boredom waiting for the AI to take the hostile NPCs away.

    This stacks with the lack of variety in this game, (android, alien, doors, android, alien, doors, android, alien. doors…) and so what should have been a MUCH shorter experience got old real quick.

  • Malevolence

    I know you didn’t say anything about sucking up bullets, “I’m saying” this isn’t the sort of game where you play as if it were an action title, it’s supposed to be slow paced, survival is the point in a survival horror title

  • RedLetterRich

    I didn’t try to play it that way. I talk about Thief in the review, pure stealth and possibly my favorite game ever. I just hate the stealth in this game.

  • Thanatos2k

    When the mechanics are boring, the combat not even combat, the stealth flawed, the puzzle solving banal and inane, what is left?

    “Ambience” is all this game has. That’s not enough.

  • Malevolence

    Thief wasn’t really a survival horror title though, you get instant gratification stealing stuff, like you get instant gratification killing stuff in games like Metal Gear or Assassin’s Creed. This is a Survival Horror title, where the gratification is sitting and waiting and realizing the enemy didn’t spot you, like the game “Outlast”

  • Thanatos2k

    So what you’re saying is there are no bad horror games, only bad players?

    Really?

  • Thanatos2k

    Whooooooooooooooooosh

  • RedLetterRich

    Yes, but doesn’t that only really work if you’re feeling tension? Without the horror you’re left with just a lacking stealth game. If you don’t get “sucked in” then the whole experience falls apart, as it did with me. Also that still doesn’t address the length issues I had with the game.

  • Thanatos2k

    Paying $60 for a game makes people go stupid in the head. It’s why I rarely do it.

  • Thanatos2k

    Yep. Now that was a scary game, but it didn’t just have atmosphere, it was good in every other facet of the game too.

    (System Shock 2 is available on GoG)

  • Thanatos2k

    Just because a group of developers is passionate doesn’t mean they made a great game.

    This is entirely the problem in video games right now. We can’t evaluate something for what it is, we have to feebly defend it for what it was trying to be.

  • Thanatos2k

    Shoving in a DLC story involving the original Alien cast isn’t doing respect to the franchise, it’s cheap pandering.

  • Thanatos2k

    You’re using my quote without understanding that you’re the prime example of it.

    Awesome.

  • Thanatos2k

    Sounds like you got successfully tricked into seeing only nostalgia, not realizing how mediocre the actual experience was.

  • Malevolence

    Horror and tension can mean many different things, I’m not sure how far you got in the game but on hard mode, later on, the alien shows up almost all the time and you’re constantly eluding him, while at the same time trying to use a plasma torch to open a hatch which makes noise. You hear him coming out of a vent somewhere behind you, and he growls. Then as you’re about to finish, you hear a screech. You hold LT, press down to open the hatch, you run in inside, seeing there is a desk to hide underneath or a locker to hide inside. Lets say I choose the locker, he enters a few seconds behind me, he knows I entered the room and looks around. He gets too close to the locker and senses me, he presses his face up to the locker, sniffs for me, I push as far back in the locker as I can and hold LT to hold my breath, I think I’m going to come out of it unscathed, due to the adrenaline of narrowly escaping into the locker, my finger slips off the LT trigger, I exhale, he rips the door off the locker, pins me to the ground and turns my face to mush… I find that experience great personally

    -Regarding the back tracking and “Length Issues”

    Games like Castlevania or Metroid are the kings of stretching out the same game play, literally reversing the same castle upside down to extend the same puzzle solving, hack and slash gameplay. With this game it implements the same thing, when you get a maintennance jack you back track to open up a door you previously could not open, or you get a plasma torch and backtrack a little bit and the gratification from that is unlocking more side story, back story of the crew, or the nostromo logs, those who enjoy knowing more about the lore of alien and enjoy further knowing more backstory of the people you hear in audio logs and what they went through this whole time adds to ambience, like in Bioshock, or DeadSpace

  • Palpatine

    Look on the bright side, Rich Evans. At least you got to wear panties. That’s at least one positive about it.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Just sayin’?

  • Malevolence

    “Boring” is a very subjective term, which in part is what I was referring to this as a game not for those who enjoy instant gratification…. Metal Gear has Stealth Kills, Thief has stealing things… This is a “Survival Horror” game. It’s not boring to me knowing that my hiding properly kept me from dying and thus having to replay a whole section of gameplay

    And Ambience is not all this game has. I use a pipe bomb to take out a group of humans, or I use an emp to take out synthetics, or I use noisemakers to distract the alien so I can get by and hack an elevator. And when I have a free moment I craft more items, saying ambience is all it has is a very narrow view of the game. But I will agree “Ambience” is the main focus of the game, as well as many other horror titles such as Silent Hill “if” you’re into those sort of games

  • Dswynne

    if the game is poor, then the game is poor. You really shouldn’t be so invested in the franchise that you ignore the problems with one of the games of that franchise.

  • Malevolence

    There is no problem that I can find if this is what you expect from a stealth, survival horror game title based primarily on the movie “Alien” I don’t know what you all are looking for when playing but if you’re looking for Metal Gear, this is not for you, if you’re looking for Thief, this is not for you. If you’re looking for Gear of War, this is DEFINITELY not for you. But I’m looking for a survival horror title that focuses primarily on eluding the enemy and not dying, unlocking more back story which adds to the ambience and making it to the end reflecting on the tense experience of it all. I saw no problems

    This isn’t Resident Evil, where a boss monster will pop out and you have to find a way to kill it. This isn’t Dead Space where hacking off limbs kills a creature. You literally cannot kill the baddy coming after you and you are forced to elude and hide throughout the game. If you expect Resident Evil, Dead Space, the stereotypical definition of “horror” than this isn’t for you

  • Thanks. Glad to be back. Watching Pre-Rec is better than humping moving boxes. Kinda.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its fun to see the rabid divide between the gamers and flimers….
    now if RLM could make a TV review show and a book club. they have all the bases covered.
    Note: a book club is used to bash people who read books.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Surely it wasn’t cheap pandering. Siggy Weaver don’t work for free, you know! Hehehe.

  • Thief is a better stealth game than any game ever made, ever. Just like Portal is a better game than any game ever made, ever. But I don’t think of Bioshock as an insult just because the last 1/3 of the game is shit or because it’s not as good as Half-Life. Nor do I praise Deus Ex or Human Revolution less even though they are riddled with bizarre decisions designwise, and the stealth is again inferior to Thief. I don’t find that insulting, I find it expectable.

    It is a shame that they reviewed the game after having played it on Easy. It’s possible that they enjoy Thief on Normal, but I would have liked to know because it is a completely different game when you play it on a different difficulty setting.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    BOOM!

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?
  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    wow… i thought i was being a dickhead….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    thats not you!!!? now i cant wank over your posts…..

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    NO! your supposed to clean my cage but you never do! no more pets!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    if you wanted you could listen to the hours of live feed of them playing the game. they post that as well….
    i doubt the liked it then either.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    do you get paid for trolling? i do it for free.

  • Holy shit, this comment section is frightening. A community forum being a giant circlejerk is no news, but this White Knighting for the reviewers is almost unbearable. The Internet makes 4channers of us all.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    are you still 12… i had hoped you grew up while i was scrolling down the page….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you sound british! you limy bastard!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    wait is this turd australian? give me his address.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    not enough of them. you know given that you exist.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    load the rest!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you know i used to think i was a moron that posted random crap…. then i saw the gamers on this….

  • UsuryName

    As another fan of survival horror, you are aware that is not true of every title in the genre, right? In fact, I’d say it isn’t true of the best examples of the genre, and it certainly wasn’t true for the original batch of games that got all of this started, as they were actually quite story driven (even if the story was ultimately lackluster, like Resident Evil).

    Silent Hill is a great example of the gratification coming more than *just* survival. In addition to its story and interpretive aspects, one has the ability to explore the town. This activity provided an in-game bonus (either more story content, more lore, or more supplies), which made the player eager to participate in such activity without *artificially* padding the game… such as by recycling corridors for 18 hours.

    Puzzles are another thing that tend to have a lot of play within the video game horror genre. These are usually what is keeping you from the next room and further progression of the story. It never felt fresh or different for me with Alien Isolation (as they said, it basically boils down to hide-and-‘door’), but overcoming a good puzzle does offer some short-term gratification, which is how the game keeps you invested when hitting patches between story development. Regular incentives to keep you playing. Alien Isolation has the same spotty stealth repeated ad nauseam to punctuate more door-opening. You may not have noticed those short-term incentives in other Survival Horror titles, but they are definitely present.

    So no, the gratification from a survival horror game does not *just* come from survival. It comes from a mélange of story progression, atmosphere, characters, puzzles, exploration, and yes: not being eaten. My point is: if your story is bare-bones, the characters non-present, and the only thing you’re banking on is nostalgia (which undercut the atmosphere, for me) and the survival aspect of the genre… it isn’t enough to prop up a game of this length.

    I think they would have been far better served trying something like Amnesia for this sort of thing. Similar gameplay, no nostalgia baggage, and *far* better pacing.

  • majordisaster

    It always struck me as weird when people talk about RE games, especially 4, as “survival horror” because what they really are are just horror(in 4’s case, B-movie horror) themed action games. Survival horror for me is stuff like this game, Amnesia/Penumbra, Clock Tower etc, most Silent Hills, e.g. games where combat plays a tangential role to the gameplay.

    And don’t tell anyone but the seminal ‘survive…in Space!’ videogame masterpiece of some minor relevance to Thief, System Shock 2 is probably best described only as a cyberpunk-horror-themed first person ~dungeon crawler~.

  • Lional punsalot

    Look crocodile brain, like lion brain.

  • Malevolence

    I was referring to Resident Evil in regards to a stereotypical “horror” game title. I too refer to games such as Outlast and Silent Hill as survival horror. But too many associate a game like this to be reviewed compared to games like Dead Space or Thief when this game should be reviewed base more off of criteria in games such as Outlast or Amnesia, I’m just disappointed… just because it has stealth, doesn’t mean it should be compared to Thief since Thief is an instant gratification stealth game and not a survival horror. Or Dead Space where the “horror” aspect is that the necromorph creatures are numerous, hard to kill, and come out of no where, but is more an action title than survival horror stealth game.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    such epic ignorance! that is why i am planing to start WW3. these little maggots would die with out media…. take media from a tru RLM fan and they would kill maggots. you know.. for shits and giggles.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its like poetry.

  • majordisaster

    It’s also weird that something like The Evil Within is getting criticized lately for not being Amnesia Like and Scary Enough just because its marketing campaign talked about ‘survival horror’ whereas the game itself was very obviously meant to be just an outright spiritual successor to RE4’s, some cheese and all. Genre labels and the way they affect our expectations…

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    if you want to know how far they got listen to the live recordings of them playing. if you want to know anything about the full experience listen to the whole thing. and until you do your comments are uninformed gibberish.

  • Guest

    it has other comments…. can we delete them?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its getting less funny! game twats listen up! RLM is a Dark comedy site!!!! its supposed to be funny and dark. they hate things. live with it or fuck off back to youtube!

  • Anonymous Coward

    I think everyone’s jumping all over this game and praising it is because it looks like a masterpiece compared to the last videogame that was set in the Aliens universe, though honestly that’s not necessarily saying much

  • Anonymous Coward

    I wish I could vote up your comment a million times and send you a tray of brownies through the internet

  • mmp

    Good point. I’ve always thought the RE series — especially 4 — as the “Evil Dead” of video games. It has a ridiculous history and fun gameplay (at least in my opinion) but some accurate horror elements and moments.

  • Sully

    No, the xenomorphs only bleed acid. Their spit is non-acidic. In Alien: Resurrection (*shudders), a pack of them sacrificed one of their own in order to use its blood to escape a cage they were in. They essentially just ripped the other xeno apart, and the blood/acid melted through the floor.

  • What~has~he~had

    Gold jacket, green jacket….seriously youre gonna play a game you like no matter what some bag of water says. Be happy they gave you their honest opinion and not some flawed piece of fluff propaganda ign and other websites shit out their arse. Im sick of checking out reviews on ign and their competitors’ sites and reading this detailed fluff piece on how awesome is. They reek of being a front for shameless self promotion by the game studios. Then i either give it a shot on steam or just rent it. And low and behold the banal unoriginal piece of doo doo that is now on my flat screen/monitor. Its nice to see a harsh review. Its a helluva alot nicer than the ones id give the last dozen or so titles i took a chance on. I was hoping the “fps based post-apocalyptic gray world” fad would be replaced with something entirely different. Instead it seems these have spawned a rash of genetically inferior, first person-non shooter survival/stealth games. (Sorry Rich, thief was balls)Games with even more missing chromosomes than their ancestors. I know these titles are aimed at the 12~24 crowd, but jesus, are they tring to kill console gaming for everyone past puberty? Im just thankful for my collection of pc games with replayability.

  • possumGFX

    My question is: What does it need to be immersed and impressed by a game? I have to admit Alien Isolation scares the shit out of me. I hardly made it through the medical bay as the stalking Alien terrifies me. Now I wonder whats wrong with me? I felt like the game gives you a very clear set of rules to survive, it constantly reminds you about what you shouldnt do. The Alien itself is of course an AI Rich and yes you can see it is because you are sitting in front of a computer/console. The Alien though is indeed very neatly done unlike the adversaries in Thief who follow the same path over and over again begging to be knocked out by the protagonist. The Alien in Isolation does at least do some things different but is as well predictable. Imagine it would have all the abilities it has in the Movies. In the movies it clearly can read your mind! It knows exactly what you are going to do, where you are heading for and when you are helpless because its written in the script! Now imagine I would trash your favorite movie by saying “Oh its clearly a dude in a suit and all of these other guys are actors. I am bored knowing this.” That would be the kind of criticism present in this review.

  • STACKMONSTER

    I spent three hours playing this shite with a friend and can confirm that this game is both dull and bizarrely inconsistent. The door “puzzles” are basically solved by grid-searching, and while the game looks nice, the areas all pretty much look identical and there’s zero tension. The only ambience I noticed was soul-crushing existential boredom.

  • matt

    Totally agree with this review. I wish I’d seen this before I blew $50 on this game

  • netcrave

    It sounds to me as if the only reason you didn’t like it (I haven’t played the game myself yet), is that guys like you can’t be scared by the alien anymore, mostly because we are all used to the “character” for 35 years now. So if it would have been a new, unknown monster, that could still scare you, you actually might have liked it. Because it seems to all come down to this single point – if the monster would scare you, you wouldn’t even be that aware of all the doors you have to open, which block your progress in the game. You’d more likely just be scared to be caught by the monster before you escape.

    I’m betting there are players who, unlike you, wouldn’t laugh at the alien but try to run and hide.

  • STACKMONSTER

    I think she’s retarded.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    are you still here? your worse than me.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you make the game sound even worse!!! i dont want to play the game you describe either…
    serves me right for reading this comment i suppose…

  • Joe Syxpac

    I haven’t seen this much butthurt since the Man of Steel review.

  • Ollie

    I really want to like this show, put Rich and Jack’s attitude of AAA game = absolute garbage makes it really difficult.

  • Malevolence

    Then obviously the game isn’t for you

  • Malevolence

    And you’re a comments roaming troll who deserves only one sentence of my time

  • Jigsaw

    In other words it’s good and very well made, with a few minor flaws that don’t matter much in the grand scheme of things? Correct!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i have to say dont be to hard on netcave the dick. most australians dont have a computer… because they try to eat them. he is probably using 486 running windows 95. also we dont have the internet… i ring a guy in north korea that has net access. he posts this for me.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    or… just saying.
    your totally wrong and it sux.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    shame abut the other sentences….

  • Welcome Back Otter

    Maybe those aliens in 4 just didn’t like the other guy? His dying thoughts might have been ‘why didn’t you just let me drool?!’

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i made this for you… welcome to RLM.

  • Welcome Back Otter

    The best part of that comment is the irony of the last bit.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    so because they disagreed with you, you are unable to make a independent review of the review…. wow thats meta!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    also… but?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you should watch go to a UK site and dis Doctor who… so much butthurt its not funny.

  • NotRickBerman

    Still a better love story than Twilight.

    Wait, what?

  • Joe Syxpac

    I’m pretty sure that’s a capital offense in the UK.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    any thing is a better love story than a glowing 200 year old pedophile….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    not damn you! notrick!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    the limy bastards rescinded the death penalty, except for teabaging the queen… dont ask!!!!!

  • Harry Butters

    You guys should play The Last of Us.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    when are you going to review Transylvania. best Apple IIe game ever!!!!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    also Stealth fighter for the c-64! epic gaming!!!!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    AND !!!!!! FOR THE !!!@>%!!!! things + STUFFFFF!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    and on this day i got so bored i trolled my self…..

  • A.I.

    They all slept with Zoe Quinn! It’s a conspiracy….. man, it’s hard to type with my head wrapped in tin foil.

  • Joe Syxpac

    If we’re talking c-64, I’m going to suggest “Mule”.

    And maybe “Mail Order Monsters”.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    foil is shit! use large bricks.

  • Joe Syxpac

    It’s only bad if you actually piss yourself off and get involved in a flame war.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i was about to….

  • Joe Syxpac

    Yeah, but the bitch paid me for it!

  • Joe Syxpac

    Don’t let me stop you.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i cant do it with people watching.

  • Lional punsalot

    Thats the good thing about dr who we can pretend were in the past when the death penalty was legal. Its a little bit like imaginary looper the game a whole village of tea drinking assholes can play.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    how many times do i have to tell you how to spell arse!?

  • Ogrot

    Just like to point out a bit of cognitive dissonance on the point of not caring. You don’t care. So that’s why in your initial post refers to Jack as “AIDSMoby” (wholly original btw no one’s ever went for that low hanging fruit). Then calling them out of touch, referring to the community as having below average intelligence despite your expectations (pretty baity), and when your flamey behavior is mocked for the immature silliness it is, you throw out the sophomoric I bet you fuck them or they pay you dude, comment. To further prove how much caring you don’t.

    But hey, obviously you don’t care. Keep on saying that to yourself.

    I hope this makes it clear why few of us are taking you seriously.

  • Lional punsalot

    listen mate im the limey fuck I get to use ass and arse depending on the douchlevelrey being described.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    clearly you dont know anything about royal protocol… when insulting a queen she is a “Skank.” or “Her Royal Slutyness.”

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    yeah… kinda my point. we were talking about Doctor Who, the queen, english death penalty….
    get your arse out!

  • Dswynne

    The problem is that you are wanting them to like this game because YOU like this game. My question is why do you care for their approval so much to the point that you’re saying that THEY are wrong to give a game you like a tepid rating? In fact, you shouldn’t need their approval. So the game is not for them, and they gave their reasons for it (i.e. “It’s a BORING game with sub-par game mechanics and unsatisfying conclusion.”). Big deal. Don’t be such a “fanboy” on this. You think they are going to change their minds on their review simply because of your counter-arguments? If they don’t like the ALIEN: ISOLATION, you should be fine with their opinion.

  • fskn

    Just like in real life…

  • Michael Collins

    Horror is a lot like comedy, am I right?

  • Lional punsalot

    fear leads to anger leads to aneurysm leads to coffin leads to defiling

  • Keegan Tatum

    Do you guys have any interest in doing RTS games?

  • Junkie

    Jesus Christ, nothing about the gameplay is an afterthought. Have you even played the game? The entire game, from the atmosphere, to the sound design, to the mechanics, are entirely based around enhancing a sense of dread and fear. A great deal of effort went into making that gameplay experience feel impacting. These two clowns not being fans of survival horror does NOT mean the gameplay in this game is an afterthought.

    A game that makes you an utterly powerless woman, hiding in lockers, dying a ton and not letting you kill the “big alien” is by no means a safe gameplay concept. This is evident from this game’s metacritic scores which vary wildly. This game is not made for everybody, and clearly Rich and Jack are part of that group.

  • Junkie

    I don’t even know why I am responding at this point. I am still trying to figure out how what I am saying isn’t getting through to you guys.

    Why do I care? I care because there is an authoritative weight being given to the opinions of two guys who clearly know next to nothing about video games. What makes Stoklasa’s Plinkett reviews work is that he comes from a film making background, lending him a ton of experience and insight in the medium. Rich and Jack have made it clearer and clearer every episode of Pre-Rec that they share no such insight when it comes to video games.

    The two of them trying to lump Isolation in as some archetypical example of the bland, corporate AAA game only furthers the notion that they have absolutely no idea what they are talking about.

  • Joe Syxpac

    What bothers me about this game is that you are hiding from an alien that doesn’t use eyes to see. It makes sense with the androids, but with the xenomorph are you also hiding your scent, body heat, and any sonic vibrations you might make like a heartbeat?

  • Mark Bisone

    What about their sperm? Do they have anti-matter baby-batter?

  • Sully
  • Hank_Henshaw

    Rich doesn’t like RTS games. Jack never played with PCs back when RTS games were, along with FPS, the reigning genre of PC gaming. So, chances of them reviewing some RTS game, slim and none.

  • Fred Frink

    you mean like red alert? that was good. since then? …
    rts nuts are weird set of people. or koreans

  • Sully

    Are calculators useful for opening doors? I threw one through a window once, but that was an “emergency.”
    Personally… and this is just me talkin’ crazy talk here, but that key sticking out of the lock… well… it seems like it might be A LITTLE FUCKING USEFUL IN THIS PARTICULAR SITUATION!!!

  • Sully

    Depends on your definition of humping… annnnnd what’s in the boxes. I mean, once you curb them and a homeless guy moves in, there really is no comparison.

  • Sully

    I thought that was inserting slot A into slot A.

  • Mark Bisone

    True. I like my boxes to be as still as a corpse when I hump them.

  • Punkster

    Ben Affleck couldn’t see either in Dare Devil but it didn’t stop him from kicking arses and making an awesome film…
    Hmmmm perhaps not.

  • Red 6

    Their inexperience or dislike of certain genres hasn’t stopped them from ignorantly reviewing games in the past, or this current review for that matter.

  • David Farrell

    I’m really surprised you didn’t feel a “sense of doom” tbh – to me, that
    alien felt absolutely lethal, and the sounds it made in the walls made me extremely paranoid. I never felt safe, especially since it routinely found me in hiding spots, or at least tried to sniff me out.

    In a way, I can understand the boredom you speak of when hiding – because after sitting in one for ten minutes, I will admit that it basically boiled down to a waiting game. But considering how stressful any amount of time is -outside- the locker, it really didn’t bother me to be getting a short break now and then. The hiding spots felt like a safe haven, rather than just monotony.

    As for the mini games and opening doors and all that – if this wasn’t a survival horror game, I’d agree with you – but trying to do those minigames when you can be killed at any moment makes it a hell of a lot more exciting than what your review suggests.

    I will admit that while it was absolutely terrifying in the beginning, encountering the alien several hours later isn’t as scary. You get used to how it looks, the sounds it makes… it’s behavior… but that doesn’t mean the game stops being interesting, because the immense stress of dealing with it never goes away.

    At least in my humble opinion.

  • fred

    heh, sucka

  • lindaoutofafrica46

    Pathetic review. Some more Americans who just don’t get it! Sad really.

  • Mark Bisone

    Looks like some of these Isolation fans could use some Asshole Lotion.

    Get it? I was doing a thing.

  • Lional punsalot

    Let the healing begin.

    Just saying.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Planet RLM is more hospitable to the needs of Wookies, anyway.

  • FT

    Very specific taste of game, slow and cinematic. This review is the perfect result of a early access buyer, with a different mind set for the final product. The game is good, my opinion, but they debate usefull points.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    “That was so fucking terrible…” – Mike Stoklasa

  • Mark Bisone

    “Alien A.I.”? More like “A Lyin’ A.I.”

    Thanks folks, I’ll be here all week! Try the veal!

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    You’re a sadist, Gryce.

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    Its strange, I really want them to review some games I love, that I know they’ll hate, because I like seeing them miserable.

  • Joe Syxpac

    All I know is that royal bitch skank slut slobbered my knob like a pro.

  • dSaur

    You realize that Alien was filled with relatively strong character moments which count as ‘instant gratification’ or however you seem to be using it, the film only works because of its excellent pacing, the narrative of this game is maybe 1/5 of what occurs in the first film stretched out over 20 hours.

    This game is one of the most unscary, unterrifying, unhorror titles ever made. The Alien became instantly loses any terror the first time you see it introduced and it becomes boring and monotonous to watch him kill you by the 2nd time it happens let alone the 50th.

    Is everyone easily spooked by this shit? Are they all 12 year olds trying to act tough or snobs getting a kick out of calling people CoD morons for criticizing the game for being poorly designed in the tension building and atmosphere department?

  • ElectricPrism

    The go play System Shock 2, it does everything this Alien game does and actually has story and substance to fill a 20 hour game.

  • dSaur

    Why are people complaining AT you conflating hard with terror and horror?

  • ikdks

    This is what I thought was the problem with GTA4. They put all their effort into the environment and none into game play or story. In 3 you would run around a simpler environment, but you could find little interesting things to do. In 4 there were interesting things to look at, but you couldn’t interact with anything (except hookers). They went to all the trouble to make this building a liquor store and that building a warehouse but in the end they’re all just identical rectangles.

    It’s probably poor planning and budgeting. They get self indulgent with the look of the game then when it’s time to start programing they’ve run out of time or money.

    Oh, and data entry is the worst cheap game gimmick. If I’m doing data entry I want minimum wage and maybe some bennies.

  • ElectricPrism

    So according to you is the only other survival horror game Slender? Because it sounds like you don’t consider it a survival game if you can kill the enemy.

  • ElectricPrism

    So what does everyone think of Half Life?

  • Keegan Tatum

    Honestly, other than Company of Heroes and the Total War franchise, there really hasn’t been anything good outside of mods that I’m aware of. Hens my interest if they’ve uncovered something.

  • Robby

    You should never let someone else’s opinion of a game influence your enjoyment. Their review is just that – an opinion. If you disagree and you love the game, that’s awesome. Once again, the Internet has a very tolerant and thoughtful reaction.

  • Charles Patterson

    “tricked?” – no, I would call it an authentic experience. If you really think about it, and were to really pace ‘Alien’ – you’d have hours of inanity. But I can understand why somebody would need flashing lights and buzzers, I don’t feel “tricked” at all, I genuinely appreciate the effort and experience. But thank you for trying to work out how I feel.

  • Flaw Filial

    Dude the last part sounds like it was written by Tommy Wiseau.

    “Do you know lessons of life?”

  • dollar store cashier wife

    It has actual pacing and something resembling cutscenes…

    insult to the artform of gaming/10

  • instant relief

    All that I’m saying is give piss a chance…

  • ElectricPrism

    You mean hard to write?

  • FT

    A refresh in the shooter genre for the time, during a decade totally under influence of Doom and Quake. The history is good, the design is strange, corridors with dead ends, blocked doors with indestructible wooden boxes, but the experience is the strong point. I remember some friends ignoring Half Life to play the Counter-Strike, the reason? the single player is boring, AI is dumb, etc.

    and…

    Half Life 2 really shines with a improved engine, great storyline and a amazing art direction for the city and enviroments. Again, some people just consider “talking to the npc, now with improved 3d.” The rest is repeat the formula for the small episodes.

    Now for Half Life 3 the great enemy is time, a development of 5 years still in the fashion for triple A games, but with a decade or more in delay, some game mechanics ideas are saturated, tastes changed and patience is a volatile condition. Games outside the RPG or Openworld even with mods are different, the engine follows in use for new ideas during the years, but the “origin” is left aside. Like COD be the first shooter in the memory of a completely new generation.

    But Valve is a smart company.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    I don’t know. With Sonic, they like platformers, but they obviously played Nintendo as kids, so they completely ignored Sonic could roll. With Titan Fall, Rich loves old-school FPS and hates multiplayer, so that explains a lot. Jack has said he likes Team Fortress (FPS and multiplayer) so I don’t know what to say about that one.

    Back to RTS, Rich has said in the streams he can’t handle the frenetic pace of RTS and prefers turn-based strategy, because it allows him to think. Personally, RTS games are more fun, I have no patience for turned-based.

  • Paulus Cañamonjas

    Best shooter ever along with Unreal. Half life 2 sucked my balls though, but I kind of get why it’s so popular.

  • Jape

    I think you’re doing the foreign fans who worship it as some quirky, crazy British (British = cool! I wish I were Morrissey…) work of art a disservice. In reality it is a soap opera for kids that pisses blood at continuity and canon. It can be very fun but its fucking stupid.

  • Jape

    I disagree with you but that final sentence made me laugh. Let’s be friends.

  • Jape

    I played this with several friends in the dark (our combined paranoia probably helped) and we were terrified and fell for tricks like seeing an alien shaped tube in the wall and running for our lives. We also quickly went from laughing at the androids to being scared of them even if the red eye thing is stupid. You make some good points about the stealth system being fruity. The mini-game thing and your IKEA joke you’ve got a point but I think its partly so you have to make a specific action beyond pressing the ‘open door’ button. In a moment of tension with the xenomorph nearby this combination of actions can add to it as you fumble at the lock so to speak. It shitted us up a few times. Horror is one of those things if you don’t get taken in by it quickly it becomes funny or even worse tedious, that happened to you guys but not to me. Different strokes. Teach the world to sing. Nowt queer as folk. Time is a flat circle. You lick my balls I’ll lick yours. Much love. x

  • I agree that xenomorphs are kind of played out. I am not afraid of them. I feel that this is a silly remake of dead space, which is genuinely frightening. Just cashing in on a franchise. If you were to replace the xenomorph with a fully rendered H.R. Giger, now that would be a game. That EMMMEFFER scares the hell out of me.

  • Malevolence

    I’m saying they have alot of fans and some who maybe on the fence about buying it rely on reviews like this. The way they describe it in the first 5 minutes they make it look like all you do is open doors and play the “warioware” mechanic when there is so much more. I found it very biased as they seem to be instant gratification gamers who don’t enjoy only this type of game but also this type of genre. They are doing a disservice to the survival horror genre as well as their gamer fans in general

  • Malevolence

    Didn’t say that. I don’t consider a game that gives you 50 different kinds of automatic weapons and a rocket launcher mowing down baddies who just so happen jump out of a dark corner a survival horror game. If you weren’t so ready to jump at my comment you would have realized that. Or maybe you did realize that and felt this would be a great time to be a snarky little twatster…… eitherway, whatever

  • Malevolence

    System Shock 2 isn’t a Survival horror game either. And as for it having more substance, that’s subjective and won’t even address as a valid argument

  • David

    Of course some people give them authoritative weight, because some people have probably watched all their Pre-Rec Videos and mostly agreed with the opinions of Rich & Jack, and when you agree with someone most of the time you tend to take their word on things. Thousands of people are subscribed to AngryJoe and consider his reviews authoritative and that guy has absolutely 0 game creating experience. Same goes for probably hundreds of gaming “Journalists”, many whom probably write for IGN/Gamespot etc, have 0 experience too and their “opinion” gets posted on Metacritic and could many times be the difference between someone throwing $60 down for a game or not…

    You don’t need to have experience making Cars to review Cars, you don’t need to have experience making movies to review movies and the same goes for Video Games. You just need to have played them enough to have cemented a set of beliefs and opinions in regards to what YOU find enjoyable/good/bad etc. Rich & Jack have clearly played enough games to cross that line, whether you personally decide to give their opinions any kind of authoritative weight is entirely up to YOU.

    Ultimately they’re still just 2 random guys, and your inability to see their point of view, whether you disagree with it overall or not, shows your absolute lack of understanding and inability to separate your views from theirs. I also personally believe games like Uncharted & The Last of Us are just AAA schlock and I’m sure a buttload of “passion” went into making those games, but I do ultimately understand why people like those games, and don’t personally go around calling people out for thinking they are some of the best games ever (And I’ve been playing Video Games all my life). It’s just my opinion, and this is Rich & Jack’s for Alien: Isolation.

    If you think they have no clue about Video Games and shouldn’t be doing Game reviews, the answer is simple: Stop watching Pre-Rec.

  • Thanatos2k

    In other words it’s mediocre but uses its source material shamelessly to trick people into thinking its good by playing on their nostalgic tendencies in order to make them rationalize how it could not be bad? Correct!

  • Pete

    Was this a troll video or were you guys being serious? With lines like “It should have been Portal like” I honestly couldn’t tell.

  • Lional punsalot

    Sometimes you come face to face with true horror, the stark dark void collapsing away into eternity. The human soul finds dealing with the comphrension of such horror especially difficult when interacting over internet video comment sections.

    Every person becomes a bad imitation of a stereotype and begins to become the horror they have faced in a desperate bid to cope with the trauma of exposure to youtube comment sections.

    The only solution is to “look crocodile brain like lion brain”. This simple phrase holds so much mystery, what meaning was meant in expressing these words, what deep philosophical idea was the writer attempting to describe.

    Only a soul trapped within a nightmare could create a phrase with so many vague interpretations.

  • Jigsaw

    I finished the game today, after almost 20 hours and I loved every minute of it.

    I also came across the sequence that you criticized. The one about Amanda listening to her mother’s message, where she heard that Ellen Ripley blew up the Nostromo to protect Amanda. You complained that the impact of that touching moment was negated by Amanda doing the opposite and trying to stop the ship from blowing up. Well… the little difference is that Ellen Ripley tried to destroy the ship while still saving herself. Amanda, however, would simply have died had she not tried to abort the detonation.

    Do you even know what a survival instinct is? You couldn’t understand that she would not just sacrifice herself while saluting and singing The Star-Spangled Banner? And how would have Amanda losing her life in the blast made her mother’s message (you know, the one where she said that she wanted to save Amanda’s life?) any more meaningful? You guys make absolutely no sense and have an almost frightening inability to make an empathic connection with the character. Sociopath much? 😉

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Well Jack didn’t even got to that part so maybe the “brilliant critique” came from watching a youtube video of that cutscene while being intoxicated on hack fraudery.

    http://i.imgur.com/GbMlJcF.png

  • Junkie

    “whether you personally decide to give their opinions any kind of authoritative weight is entirely up to YOU.”

    Wow, you think so? What does that have anything to do with what I am saying? The very problem here is that there ARE people who give authoritative weight to their opinions, when they are proving more and more with each episode that they have little to no experience with the medium, something that makes the Plinkett reviews, Half in the Bag and Best of the Worst worthwhile. You don’t need to make video games to lend an opinion on them, but when you only discover you can jump in Titanfall–a game literally designed around verticality and parkour combat–several hours in, there’s a pretty big problem. I don’t even have to mention the Sonic debacle.

    I have no idea why you keep prattling on about “passion” or me being unable to accept that they have their own opinions, when my ultimate point is that there is literally NOTHING AAA about a “single player only first person video game with almost no combat, tons of death, minimal hand holding and invulnerable enemies”. Your typical AAA publisher would not pour millions of dollars into asset-for-asset authenticity. It would pour that money into a season pass and a tacked-on deathmatch gamemode. Your typical publisher intervention would end up in a game a lot less like Isolation and a lot more like Colonial Marines. For Jack and Rich to not see this in their smug diatribe and condemn this game as “another AAA eye-candy title” just further cements how worthless their opinions are.

    Pre-Rec has no reason to exist and only barely survives on the coattails of all of the fabulous content that RLM happens to also produce.

  • Ogrot

    I think they meant in terms of length. And perhaps also puzzle complexity than find the next rail stop door or switch.

  • Josh

    Hi Guys, please review The Witcher games, I would love to see what you think about them.

  • Old Ben

    Jack you fraud! You also stole Fuckbot from Sandler’s Gay Robot. You bought the “Shhh… Don’t Tell” CD from the Music Records and Collectibles store in Waukesha, Wisconsin. I know because I SOLD IT TO YOU!

  • its called bleach

    what does being american have to do with it? are they too busy enjoying freedom to understand the game?

  • Evil Octopus

    Great review. Highlighted everything that made me worried I wouldn’t like the game.

  • Jessey Bowman

    “Live with the fact that people have opinions other than those you hold.”

    I do.
    You obviously do not.

    I enjoyed playing this game. I enjoyed the game play. I wasn’t bothered by the pacing. I wasn’t bothered by the characters. I wasn’t bothered by the mini-games. I wasn’t bothered by these “flaws” that Pre-Rec and, apparently, you consider this game to have. It has nothing to do with how the game looks (which, while pretty, isn’t the best graphics in the world). It has everything to do with not putting on my “nitpicking hat”, and just enjoying what there is to enjoy. Probably because I’m not going to make a review of it and put it online to get money and popularity (which Red Letter Media does do, and I don’t hold that against them, but it’s probably why they’re being so theatrical and over-the-top in their “disgust” of this game.)

    YOU are the one who appears to be bothered by the fact that I disagreed with them. To each their own, I say.

    But it’s funny that die-hard fans of Red Letter Media always get up in arms if anyone DARES to contradict the God’s of Criticism. That anyone who does is just a MONSTER who doesn’t allow anyone else to have an opinion!

    No.

    They have an opinion. I have an opinion. My opinion, while differing from theirs, doesn’t CANCEL out their opinion. It’s just here along side theirs ; take it or leave it.

    Have a nice day.

  • My ex wife

    As I am completely indifferent about this game and all others to be honest, I can empathise. How ever I am sad to see our lovely comments sections being burned to the ground by random interlopers. I used to think of it as my safe happy place. 🙁

  • Well, that’s something.

    Reminds me of what Fred said to Ted in Barcelona:

    Do you think any cool Trade Fair girl would give you the time of day if she knew the pathetic Bible-dancing goody-goody you are? You’re far weirder than someone merely into S & M. At least they have a tradition. We have an idea what S & M is from movies and books. But there is nothing to explain the way you are.

  • David

    Sonic Debacle? There was no Sonic Debacle, they presented their opinion about the game and series, people choose to agree/disagree. Even if the majority disagree and hate them for it, at least they’re keeping themselves consistent and sticking to their beliefs rather than lie and spout shit just to get more subscribers and views.
    As for Titanfall, it’s been awhile since I watched it and being that I had no interest in Titanfall I didn’t really pay much attention anyway. So I can’t recall the Jumping issue but as for some of the other problems with it they had that I can remember, many were very valid.
    Also are you forgetting their other reviews? Mario Kart, Guacamelee etc, they hold very valid criticisms on the games they discuss, and always explain themselves very well. Even if I disagree with certain points (And trust me I did disagree with a couple of the points they made for A:I), at least they provide enough explanation and frequently video footage also so I know where they’re coming from and can understand their point.

    I keep “prattling on about passion” because you brought that up. You made that a big center point. It was that this game can’t possibly be “insulting AAA trash” because the developers had “passion”.
    Game Developers come up with an idea that they think is great, and the Publishers decide whether they think it has potential to make money and they fund it. Think what you want about AAA games, but ultimately SEGA believed that Alien: Isolation would have enough market appeal to pour those millions into it and they sure as hell didn’t do it just because they thought CA was doing right by the Aliens franchise or saw the overwhelming passion by the Devs and wanted to support that. (Look at The Evil Within for a good example similar to Isolation)
    Also are you somehow magically forgetting that Alien: Isolation had pre-order DLC AND a Season Pass that you can buy RIGHT NOW?

    You like Alien: Isolation. I get it and I ain’t holding that against you, like what you like. But you’re trying to make out like as if Jack & Rich have personally insulted you by claiming that it is AAA shit. If they throw Isolation into the AAA shit category, they’re perfectly allowed to do so. They also made some extremely valid points and criticisms in the video, which goes above some possibly over-exaggerated statement made overall about the game.

    Pre-Rec doesn’t have to exist, at least not for you, it’s as simple as just not watching the videos and ignoring it. I stopped liking AngryJoe, so I stopped watching. You don’t like Pre-Rec, stop caring and ignore the videos when they come out. Let people who are actually able to hear their points, process it in a reasonable/critical manner and come to their on judgments enjoy the show, and not just get outraged over a statement they’ve made or get annoyed because they aren’t praising that game you love.

  • Lional punsalot

    rich played witcher for an hour and didn’t get into the game, thought the controls were clunky and the story boring.

    I happen to agree with his opinion.

  • Ogrot

    Ok I’ve educated myself with like five hours of footage from let’s players who seemed to actually enjoy themselves while playing. I can safely at least say if I purchased it for $60 I would be pretty disappointed with my spending. And based on my observation I think the flaw in this game is in the pacing and the fact that it’s a hot date that is ultimately shallow and uninteresting. The art is gorgeous and obviously painstakingly recreated and true to source material. The problem is a good survival horror needs more than beauty and a good stealth or combat game. Ambiance is the key and ambiance is more than blood spattered rooms, corpses, and particle effects. It is a setting that tells an engaging story. A setting that presents a mystery the player wants to solve. This is why games like Silent Hill, Bioshock 1, Amnesia, Dark Souls, and System Shock II (don’t quibble with me about genre terms these are all games known for their ambiance), are so memorable.

    Take for example Bioshock’s opening. After a brief cutscene, you orient yourself to the world of Andrew Ryan’s Utopian dreams through the monument within the lighthouse and the bathosphere’s slide show and of course the panorama shot of the city. We then enter the port where the story of the city begins to be told. Not just through random people’s vinyl podcasts. but from the items that remain strewn about. The port is filled with discarded protest placards and luggage as what appears to be hundreds of people attempted to leave rapture when things started falling apart. There are memorials for missing girls, tons of details that make the settings feel lived in and part of a cohesive world, and of course constant reminders of the political turmoil that characterizes its downfall. All of which is placed purposefully to tell little vignettes about the setting. Contrast that with the opening of Alien: Isolation where we are treated to about ten minutes of beautifully rendered cutscenes and a wonderfully reproduced seventies era Alien ship interior. Remarkably lit in all its damaged glory. Then you come across the obligatory short hand for shits fucked up socially in a video game: generic graffiti. Simple cliched and cryptic “They knew” and what amounts to keep away we are all done for claptrap. It’s a lazy attempt to establish an ambiance of social instability within the space station on top of the fact that their is an alien killing everyone. A setting contrivance not dwelled upon other than that’s what happens in this kind of setting, and serves as an excuse to have humanoid enemy types other than android’s throughout the game. And that’s the problem with the ambiance of this game. Beyond the hide and seek with the alien and other dangerous things there is nothing to discover other than the occasional gruff company man’s podcast where he complains about his job or boss. You crawl into a duct to find a corpse and your reward is simply some scrap to make yourself another medkit or noisemaker. No other story about this setting is told other than the one grandiosely rendered on cutscenes. And if you find yourself not so invested in that your immersion can be easily busted if you don’t jump scare so easily. These oversights on creating ambiance don’t surprise me given CA’s portfolio. For years they’ve been a company big on grand spectacle in terms of art design and really story light and fine detail light in terms of narrative design. This kind of fine detailing in terms of narrative and art is not quite their bailywick.

    The concept however is a good one with potential. Frankly I would’ve liked more survival with an emphasis on improvising with your environment. How about I be able to smash a steam pipe with that big ass wrench to create a temporary steam barrier an enemy can’t follow through? How about I use my hack tool to remotely shut a door right on a guys fucking arm or to temporarily trap a Xenomorph’s skull. You know reward me for paying attention to what’s around me and considering what my tools can do?

  • Jigsaw

    You know what a survival game also needs to work? It needs to be played by yourself and not just watched while others play. You form your opinion on the game on a completely skewed experience that completely misrepresents what the experience of actually playing the game feels like. Yes… things like the world interaction look strange and boring when you are not in the moment. But I assure you, it’s not. Watching Let’s Play videos is completely inadequate to convey the atmosphere.

  • Ogrot

    You can get the feeling for ambiance by seeing the art in action. You don’t need a controller to notice the lack of a story told by the setting alone. It’s either there or it isn’t. In five hours of footage I’ve seen from various parts of the game I think it’s safe to say there is no story other than what’s in the cut scenes. A waste of such good art assets, sadly.

    The question I always ask myself about something is not how good is it, but how good for the price. I don’t think it meets that based on what I’ve seen.

  • Joe

    Good review guys. Most internet reviewers just try to rage at games because hating on games seems to get more views than honest reviewing so it’s nice that you guys do an honest review show, because it makes the times when you really have to rip apart a crap game that much more entertaining and sincere.

    The first handful of episodes of Pre-Rec I had some minor (hopefully helpful) constructive criticisms, but the past several episodes I really haven’t had anything negative to say whatsoever. Not that the show is ever bad, it’s always been good, but I like to try to give helpful feedback when I can, attempt to let you guys know if you are using too many dutch angles, but again this week I really have no feedback about how to make the show better. Editing is great, humor is good, discussion is good, it’s good that you knew people would say “but it’s about the stooorie!” because if you didn’t mention that that’s what all the comments would have been. So great job, Jack/Rich for your discussion and great job Jack for your editing.

    PS: Even your refrigerator has a Nukie poster on it? You guys really do “do it all for the Nukie”.

  • cyberdunk

    I find it hard to believe that Rich likes old school FPS when he was whining about Rocket Launchers being cheap when he played TF2. That makes no sense, RLs were basically staple weapons in old school shooters. I mean, in Q1 and Q3 MP you used the RL as your all purpose weapon most of the time.

    I guess he finds splash damage in MP games cheap, but that’s ridiculous. TF2’s RL isn’t OP at all.

  • Joe

    One more thing, if either of you has epilepsy be careful of Zelda II, the death screen in the original version of the game flashes colors quickly and I’d hate for one of you to have a seizure (though it would probably make for a really dramatic episode of Pre-Rec).

    Also,you are probably going to have annoyed fans if you don’t mention the “I am error” guy, who is likely the most notable thing about Zelda II. I look forward to the next episode, and unlike Sonic, you probably won’t upset many people if you say the game sucks.

  • Ogrot

    Also the world interaction stuff didn’t bother me. I understood the point of fine motor skill shit under duress. It was just the fact that outside of obvious religious nostalgia of the Alien art aesthetic there wasn’t much else to the setting of the game. Sevastopl ain’t no Rapture and it ain’t no Silent Hill neither. It ain’t either of those things because in those games the setting (not just the art assets themselves but how they are placed and utilized) tells a story all by themselves without any stupid voice actor telling you about it. It is the allure of that mystery that draws you to taking risks and actually looking for the scares.

  • mercianomad

    I liked the ambience and atmosphere in this one. Some things about it remind me of a sort of video game version of 2001: ASO – slow pacing, stark and sterile interiors (if blown to shit in places and of course not titanium white), long stretches with little or no action, crazy but chill-talking AI trying to kill you, quiet and understated mood, indeed not much in the way of story, etc. I do turn music off in games, so there’s that too. And no, not trying to compare them very directly or say it’s as good as Kubrick’s film. But I like the two things for a lot of the same reasons.

  • Ogrot

    I don’t know about witcher one but that is totally true for witcher 2 on the PC. Which threw me for a loop because the xbox 360 version was so much more responsive. The controls part. I thought the story was serviceable. Never got into witcher 1.

  • Old Ben

    I’m also looking forward to the Zelda II review. I didn’t enjoy it as a kid, but I really like it as an adult. I would not be surprised if they hate it and make fun of the Zelda series and get a bunch of flak for it. Anyways let’s crack open the nostalgia juice early with some town music.
    http://youtu.be/ulQOxDk-T3k

  • thehilblog

    I haven’t actually played this game so I cannot confirm or deny if their crankiness is warranted, but what they said lines up with a lot of the criticism I’ve read elsewhere. Probably not THAT bad though, just plain ‘ol mediocre. Plot sounds disappointing though, especially if you’re an Alien fan.

  • its called bleach

    im gonna post some lttp because fuck the police

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BStjuHfP238

  • thehilblog

    I will say though, that they were pretty much setting themselves up for disappointment here and I find it funny that they’re immediately retreating to Zelda. It’s like they realized what a lot of us have been saying since Day 1, that they should stick to indie and retro and avoid AAA.

  • Flossy

    I agree with everything you guys said. Of course your gonna catch flak for insulting a triple A video game. especially when its game of the month on the internet. its just to be expected. Still great video and I love you rich

  • Where’s Paul Verhoeven?

    Barcelona from Whit Stillman, director of the whitest movies that ever whited. Such as:

    Last Days of Disco featuring pre Len Wiseman era Kate Beckinsale when she still was an actor, and Chloe Svengyeyvey before she blew Vincent Gallo.

    http://persephonemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/930_last_days_of_disco_blu-ray_x04_.jpg

  • Joey Delgadillo

    Why didn’t you guys play on hard?

  • Sully

    These are both appropriate reactions…

  • valou999

    Well I haven’t played the game yet so I don’t have my own opinion yet, however from what I’ve seen from both positive and negative review, I’m fairly certain I’d enjoy it. I don’t mind slow paced game and one of my favorite game is Amnesia, a game Alien Isolation mimics quite a bit. All I could really gather from watching this video was that the 2 reviewers have serious ADD, like most kids these days, and get bored when things aren’t actiony all the time – and that’s why we can’t have nice things. I’m half-kidding really, but conisdering the game is both acclaimed by critics and fans and you guys couldn’t find even one good thing to say about it (besides the graphics) doesn’t make me incline to take this review very seriously.

  • Pete

    You can’t watch a game like this to get a proper feeling of it. If these are your go to guys for reviews because you have similar tastes then fair enough, but having played it myself I don’t think their review was accurate at all.

  • Noah R.

    Why thank you <3

  • Noah R.

    By the way they smell? I know, the stench just hasn’t set in yet with most of ‘m…

  • Noah R.

    You MUST always love Rich, he is our Lord and Saviour!

  • Noah R.

    Couldn’t have said it better.

  • Noah R.

    “The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown” – H.P Lovecraft

  • Harry Butters

    After watching this review, then watching someone play this game on a harder difficulty, I have to say that maybe you guys didn’t get the whole story. I get that ‘normal’ and ‘easy’ mode allows for a much greater audience, and that a game should be fun on all levels of difficulty, but some (if not most) games are at their best on the harder or hardest difficulty. An example that comes to mind is the Metal Gear Solid series. Granted, normal and easy modes are tons of fun unlike maybe this game, which is why the series is so popular, but man the extreme and euro-extreme difficulties are how those games are meant to be played. They become masterpieces because it punishes you mercilessly for making mistakes, but rewards you just as heavily for flawless gameplay, allowing you to be fully satisfied after completion.
    By not reviewing this game on a harder difficulty, you doing a major disservice to the game and the review. Watching my friend fumble through the “mini games” as you called them, putting in the codes and changing the numbers to open the doors as quickly as possible while worrying if the alien had turned that corner yet was pretty stressful, and more importantly tons of fun. I hate to point flaws, but this is slightly similar to the Sonic review where you essentially played the game wrong, and are only using a limited perception when making the review. That said i still like the show and will continue to watch it because you guys are entertaining and video games are awesome. I’m looking forward to the Zelda 2 review. In terms of the sequel to the first one it’s a stupid, god awful representation of what the first one achieved, though I still enjoyed playing it. (A DNSQ video on Zelda was pretty eye opening I recommend it) Thanks again RLM for these videos!

  • Michael Collins

    Please don’t ever review any games I like, thank you for your time.

  • mercianomad

    Agree about playing it on hard mode. I would also recommend not using the motion tracker, especially if criticism about it is going to be that it shows you where to go next and you would rather figure that out on your own.

  • Red 6

    How dare you accuse them of playing the game wrong these 2 are obviously gamer gods and they have extensive gaming experience as well as possessing incredible skill in anything they play.

    Sonic is overrated. Don’t question it just keep shoving popcorn in your face.

  • Guest

    So why not tell us what you didn’t like about the review instead of leaving a xenophobic comment.

    At least Jack and Rich spent more than three seconds to tell us why they didn’t like this game.

  • Nomad Fixbot

    So why not tell us what you didn’t like about the review instead of leaving a xenophobic comment.

    At least Jack and Rich spent more than three seconds to tell us why they didn’t like this game..

  • Jessey Bowman

    You can like a game or you can not like it. But these guys are insulting about it and complain about it in a way that does show an apathy for anyone who could like it.

    “b : one who has an offensive air of superiority in matters of knowledge or taste.”

    They have it. They are snobs. To say they aren’t snobs would be to ignore how offensive they are in their opinion of the game.

    You turning my analysis of this specific situation into a sweeping generalization as a way to discredit me seems to convince all the FLM fanboys upping your comment, but it doesn’t convince me.

  • Jessey Bowman

    Another person turning my statements into sweeping generalizations.

    What I said did not imply that there are no bad horror games. (Ju-on: The Grudge for the Wii is a bad horror game.)
    Nor does it imply anything about “bad players.”

    When I said they want to act like they’re “too good”, I mean that they want to make this game seem terrible and horrible because it never made them scared.

    But horror in a horror game is subjective.

    Some people find Five Nights at Freddy’s to be scary. Some people don’t.

    Some people find F.E.A.R. to be scary. Some people don’t.

    It all comes down to whether the person playing the game wants to let themselves believe that what is happening in the game is “scary”.

    Ultimately: a video game can never incite true fear because the person playing the game is never in true danger. Real fear comes from real danger.

    The Alien in Alien: Isolation does not make me feel real fear ; it never could. But I let it feel “scary” because I let myself be concerned with the Alien finding me and killing me. I let myself feel the tension of the cat and mouse chase.

    There is no video game that can force anyone to experience fear. You have to let yourself feel something over what’s happening in the game. That’s all I mean by what I’ve said.

  • Jessey Bowman

    He’s totally wrong and it sucks to you, Andrew. But you’re totally wrong and you suck to me, Andrew. Guess that evens everything out.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Hey I am still blocked? If so I don’t care.
    Edit. I am not any one. Thanks, mod!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Me reading these comments.

    http://i.imgur.com/2qdDUkc.gif

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Alien AI? What do those two movies have anything to deal with each other?

  • proghead777

    You probably think they’re “played out” because there hasn’t been anything really great to come out of the franchise since Aliens. And that was 19 goddamn 86! There’s nothing wrong with the concept. You could still make a great movie or game in the Alien universe. The problem is that ever since James Cameron passed on Alien 3, the franchise has been exclusively in the hands of brain damaged monkeys (excluding David Fincher, who deserves little-to-none of the blame for the catastro-fuck that was Alien 3).

  • Joe Ottoson

    I can see why Alien Isolation could wear out its welcome for some. Hours and hours of fetch quests tend to get a bit tiring.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s Half Life. What else can be said about it? It’s the most perfect series in the gaming medium.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Rich always plays hard with the ladies

  • Th-Th-Thimmey

    Weird how I love their movie commentaries and reviews, but I haven’t enjoyed any of these PreRec shows. They just sound old and bitter, kind of depressing to watch.

  • Thom Stone

    i thought you died in 1977
    or a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away..

  • Thom Stone

    sharks are pretty scary.
    sharknados are even scarier

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Does a game like Alien: Isolation do a disservice to itself by having different difficulty settings?

  • Thom Stone

    what are these ‘vid-e-ah gaymes’ and why are the youth so happy about them?

  • Thom Stone

    ive seen pics of her.
    ..why would anyone want to sleep with her?

  • Thanatos2k

    And when they discover that the stealth is crappily implemented, they no longer feel fear that the Alien is going to find and kill them, but frustration when it randomly decides to do so, and confusion when they’re half crouched behind a desk and it ignores them.

    A horror game that breaks immersion won’t scare anyone.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    that equation is wrong… you for got to carry the suck.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you say that on a british webzone the!

  • Guest

    i dare you to post that on a british fan page.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    did you get blocked again? how do you do? it i keep trying….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i heard some epic advice on maintaining fitness by using consoles like the wii… “your body cant see, so it dosent know your not really playing tennis…”
    i think that something in that apples to all of our lives.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its RLM!

  • WrongWithYourFace

    “– That’s why the Wheel of the Worst was designed, a torture device for the modern age.” – H.P Lovecraft

  • Stef B

    Alright, I typed and deleted a lot of comments I was going to make. I’m going to put this nicely: the two of you, together, suck at video game reviews. Terribly. You make Red Letter Media worse with these.

    HitB and the Plinkett reviews betray a pretty cool insight into and love for the medium they’re reviewing. The same cannot be said for Pre-Rec. It is mostly two older dudes bitching about stuff they seem to not know enough about and most of the complaints can be simplified to “the game wasn’t what I wanted it to be”.

    Also, if the footage is from a PC version, your PC sucks and should not be used to base a review on – especially when you complain about how the game looks.

    EDIT: Also, this review kind of dragged on and on. Ironic, huh?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Yes it does but the same can be said about every horror game really.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Did the makers of this game hire a bunch of people to troll reviews?

    I’ve never seen so many people who couldn’t handle an opinion. We’re not talking about religion here, it’s just a lousy game nobody will remember a year from now.

  • Jigsaw

    No, the problem is that a large publisher took a risk by making a game like this. A game that is actually pretty damn good! By treating it unfairly and giving it much worse reviews than it deserves it puts off people from buying it and we will be back to generic shooters in no time, and everyone who really enjoyed Alien Isolation will be left out in the cold and not get more of it. As a result reviews like this really piss me off, because the try to sabotage my future enjoyment of games like that.

  • Jigsaw

    My point was that you perceive everything very differently when you play the game yourself, when you have a stake in your actions and aren’t just a passive onlooker who doesn’t care what happens to the player that you watch playing. It’s a game not a movie. You can’t judge it propery without playing it yourself.

  • tsjoot

    Your opinions are wrong and you should feel bad! If you can cope with feeling anything at all, you soulless hacks! Ps I love you guys!

  • Sherv

    Please review Wonderful 101 on Wii. 😀

  • Jape

    Andrew just said a UK site, which being British I go on regularly to talk about gum disease and chips and sometimes to talk about Doctor Who and its flaws. A fan page is a fan page regardless of nationality that was my point. Brit fanboys grew up with it and have a cultural unconditional love for it so might (just maybe) acknowledge its flaws but don’t care, foreign fans (Americans and for some bloody reason Singaporeans in particular) came to it as some quirky, nerdy pseudo-hipster Cool Britannia thing and react poorly when you pop the bubble of their awesome niche thing that you wouldn’t understand because you’re an American Idiot. Yeah Bush.

    Basically I think the British fanboys are drones while the foreign fanboys are pretentious.

  • Jape

    “they try to sabotage my future enjoyment of games” – really?

  • GeneralFailer

    Complain about how the game looks? Are you implying that better specs would improve the alien animation? This is just a blatant lie otherwise.

  • mmp

    At least in my PC they praised the looks of the ship and the computers and how the details were faithful to the source material.

  • mercianomad

    Is it okay if I upvote you for the Crimson avatar? I don’t really care about your comment.

  • mmp
  • mercianomad

    Yay… it’s internet cliché time! Let’s try it out….let’s see, how does this go again…

    Did RLM hire a bunch of people to agree with everything they say?

    I’ve never seen so many people who couldn’t handle an opinion. I’m not
    talking about religion here. It’s just a lousy review nobody will remember a year from now.

    Yep, pretty easy to do.

    Don’t forget to call me an Alien: Isolation “fanboy,” and then I can call you
    an RLM “fanboy” and then we can proceed to all the other e-clichés, from
    conflating criticism with “whining,” to pronouncing anything remotely
    wordy as “pseudointellectual,” to telling people not to let doors hit
    them on the ass, to Godwin, to calling each other “butthurt,” (oops, you already used this one below), etc.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    They played the PS4 version of the game too. I believe at one point they say the game looks “beautiful”. The game’s graphics is not part of their list of complaints.

  • tim

    I feel like the game is ok. But the stealth is terrible. I never know whether im visible or not or in danger on not. Its just so random

    Amnesia had “spawn – despawn” mechanic too, but it was done in a way u know whats happening. Here its: OH no alien better hide.. ok hes gone, nope im dead!

  • Guest

    MARIO KART RULES SCREW YOU!

    Actually that was an insightful and measured comment.

    BUT SCREW YOU!!!1

  • Michael Hogue

    The Stealth is not crappily implemented if you play the game on Hard, Which might be the game’s real flaw which was to have difficulty settings at all. It should’ve just been set at Hard by default and have no option to change the difficulty.

  • Michael Hogue

    All I can say is that you two are clearly out of touch with the gaming industry if you think that this of all games is considered “the death of an art form”.

  • Thanatos2k

    Sounds like a massive design flaw, given the vast majority of people will choose Normal if given choices.

  • Michael Hogue

    Well like I said, it is a flaw, but to the game’s credit when you first choose the difficulty it actually does recommend playing the game on Hard mode for the most definitive experience.

  • Fuck Me I’m January

    So I got a facebook notification yesterday saying that you guys reuploaded Long Walk Home onto youtube but when I tried to search for it just now I couldn’t find it anywhere. What happened, did it contain the image of Muhammad? It looks like it disappeared.

  • Bhazor

    “No, the problem is that a large publisher took a risk by making a game like this.”

    So a publisher copying a four year old indie game (Amnesia) and adding a thirty year old franchise to it counts as a terrifying risk these days?

  • dollar store cashier wife

    That’s literally the only defence people here can come up with-your’re a fanboy of “insert game here” if you dislike PreRec! Talk about compelling discussion.

  • fred

    You guys should review Fury for the next Half in the Bag.

  • fred

    They said the game looked great, like most triple-A titles. The gameplay was the problem.

  • Brian Levine

    Watching crappy movies and talking about them is entertaining. Playing crappy games is just painful and talking about them pretty boring.

  • Ogrot

    You know they did make like six paranormal activity movies. People like the bore to tears and then startle formula. To them darkness, blood spatter, and religious references to previous canon in a banal manner is ambiance. It’s safe horror. The kind of horror that doesn’t make the viewer reflect on anything. But what do I know I’m just some mindless COD dudebro that can see the difference between this setting and a carefully crafted experience like Amnesia.

  • The very one. Stillman’s godfather was my mentor. Barcelona is the only movie I’ve ever seen that reflects my life.

  • ikdks

    It’s better when they like it.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I never said I agree with their review.

    The game looks fine to me. Not groundbreaking, but a fun way to kill a few hours. I would prolly play it if someone put it in front of me. I’m not going to buy it, but I never buy any games anymore.

    I’m just curious why people are taking their criticisms personally. As if they actually had any hand in making the game as opposed to just being someone that plays it. There is someone here attacking what PC they’re using because they don’t like the review. What I’m not seeing is people telling us what is actually good about the game so we can have a back and forth. Since we’re not getting that I’m just gonna troll for upvotes until the next vid gets uploaded.

  • I am a fan of that sub-genre of sci-fi cinema where absolutely nothing happens for roughly 90 minutes and then something happens but you’re not sure what exactly.

    That’s fine on film but not so good in a video game where ideally you should be presented with regular opportunities to maim Imperial Stormtroopers or their historical equivalents. Nobody would play tennis if it involved staring through the holes in your racket for two hours.

    The alien in Door Opening Simulator: Isolation displays the demeanour and ungainly gait of someone who regrets their choice of Halloween costume. I think this game could be redeemed by a cut scene at the end where, having mortally wounded the alien, you remove its mask only to discover that it’s your mother in fancy dress. Her dying words to you:

    “It was just a practical joke honey… and I would have got away with it if it wasn’t for my meddling kid.”

    The final scene would be your character struggling to unlock a pair of handcuffs with their retro handhold computer.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I don’t think the game is going to suffer because of this review. RLM gives scathing reviews of movies all the time and they haven’t changed the movie industry at all.

  • No, you clearly don’t understand how instructions work.
    ‘A’ and ‘B’ refer to different instances of the the same thing, you can’t inset a slot into itself, that’s physically impossible. You could inset “Tab A into Slot A” or “Slot A into Slot B”.
    If we’re using Tabs and Slots as euphemisms for penises and vaginas, which I believe we are, then “Tab A into Slot A” would be “traditional” penetrative sex, “Slot A into Slot B” would be what the kids these days call “scissoring” as tankadin said.
    I hope you can fully appreciate the humor of his joke now that I have explained it.

    Inserting “Slot A into Slot A” as you ludicrously suggest would be some kind of vaginal origami, coincidental Vaginal Origami is the name of my Spice Girls cover-band.

  • Jessey Bowman

    I never had that problem when I played. I was also playing on the hardest difficulty. The Alien always found me when it should have found me. There was never a confusing moment of what would and wouldn’t work for me.

    It looked like they were playing it on Easy, honestly. Most games will severely hamper or confuse the A.I. on lower difficulties. So to complain about it here and give the game a lower score for doing something every other game does just isn’t fair.

  • Jessey Bowman

    How is that a design flaw when every other game in the world does this? You’re literally saying every game that has a difficulty setting is flawed.

    Oi vey!

  • Kenlin Bros

    No, that’s slot V into slot V. Slot A into slot A is altogether filthier.

  • Sully

    Depends on what part of town they’re from.

  • Sully

    Actually, in instruction manuals, the same parts are given the same number/letter (see linked image).

    http://www.eurway.com/images/illusion-bookcase-assembly.jpg

  • I agree that Alien 3 wasn’t that bad, and am a big fan of David Fincher. The fear from the movies come from H.R. Giger and the nightmares that happily live in his head. I think with the proliferation of the idea of a Xenomorph and all of the hideous facts about its lifecycle, physiology, etc.present in today’s consciousness like Jack stated in the review, we are about o year away from cute japanese cartoons featuring facehuggers and chest bursters. I was fucking terrified of Alien which I saw when I was six. I was petrified by Aliens which I saw when I was ten. The idea is comical now, once I saw H.R. Giger’s other works and how fucked up he really is, the Xenomorph represents nothing but one man’s Neurosis/Psychosis. I refuse to be afraid of someone else’s boogeyman.

  • Whaaat? That’s a pretty confusing instruction manual, are regular IKEA ones like that? The ones I’ve seen look far simpler with each part given a unqiue letter, but I’m a 22 year old video editor, the only thing I’ve ever built with my hands is a computer.

    Suffice to say I know as much about reading putting together furniture as I do about “scissoring”, I just pretending I know what I’m talking about on the internet.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    What about Hellsing Fanfic and John Wick?

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    I would love for Rich and Jack to play games that are so bad they’re good. Like Ride to Hell Retribution, which is the Elves of video games. Even Mike might enjoy it’s badness.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “Now I am become geth, the destroyer of morlds”
    -Rich Evans

  • Jason Ross

    That’s a fascillime of my bachelor party getting under way.

  • Jason Ross

    Does “hard” make it less repetitive? Do you open windows and cookie jars instead of just doors?

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Thanatos2k

    When games suck on certain difficulties – when their entire structure and gameplay mechanics working properly are based on picking the right difficulty, that is a HUGE FLAW.

    If a horror game is not scary on certain difficulties it has failed as a horror game.

  • Thanatos2k

    I don’t see a score attached to this review. Why did you mention that?

  • Thanatos2k

    If people hail mediocrity because there’s nothing better around, all you get is mediocrity.

    And that’s the death of an art form.

  • Thanatos2k

    The problem is, just because they took a risk doesn’t mean the game is good and deserves praise.

    Just because you like the direction does not mean you are obligated to cover for its massive flaws and attack anyone suggesting it’s not good.

  • Thanatos2k

    Why did they use that take? You know, the worst one?

  • Thanatos2k

    The natural inclination of the vast majority of people is to pick the middle difficulty if presented with a range of options.

    They’ve done studies on this.

  • Thanatos2k

    Sorry, they’ve done better since then:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWgQz8XNV3M

  • Thanatos2k

    Portal *length*

  • Thanatos2k

    One of the best games of all time? Why would you even ask that?

  • Thanatos2k

    There aren’t any cutscenes in Half Life outside of a couple spots where you just temporarily lose control. It was a point of emphasis during their design.

  • Thanatos2k

    It makes even less sense with the androids. You don’t think a computer could figure out better if you’re in that locker? They can probably see your heat signature.

  • Thanatos2k

    The world may never know.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Part time

  • Mark Bisone

    Since I didn’t get to chime in on the live Twitch stream…

  • Thanatos2k

    The thing is, the problem is they tried to marry a stealth game with a horror game.

    As you know, there are many stealth games that are not horror games (Metal Gear Solid, Mark of the Ninja, Thief, etc) and many horror games that are not really stealth games (Resident Evil, Dead Space, F.E.A.R., etc)

    When you merge genres, there are many things that can go wrong. Both Rich and Jack naturally started to work out the mechanics and game the system in order to “beat” the stealth game. When the mechanics underpinning the stealth game began to affect the integrity of their horror game, they felt it undermined the entire experience.

  • Thanatos2k

    Resident Evil 4 is the worst thing to happen to the Resident Evil series.

    It’s a good game, a great game even, but it’s a terrible Resident Evil game. As such, when it was a runaway success, Capcom, idiots that they are, thought “people want more of this out of Resident Evil!” and so we got the shitstains that are the action fueled idiocy of RE5 and RE6.

    Resident Evil 4 is barely survival horror.

  • Ray

    I thoroughly enjoyed the game and felt is only dragged out in the last 3rd. It also best played on easy, which is difficult enough.

  • Palpatine

    Dick Neutral? Is that an alias that Rich Evans uses when he’s doing private dectective work?

  • Michael Hogue

    Besides the fact that the whole idea of any one game being considered “the death of an art form” is ludicrous and overly dramatic, the idea that the game is mediocre is entirely subjective. The game has seen lots of praise as well as criticism so the idea that this game is somehow mediocre when the opnions on it are so divided is ridiculous.

    Rich and Jack are just two people with an opinion, they don’t define what games are good or bad. I certainly don’t agree with their views of the game and honestly think this is one of the best Horror games I’ve ever played. I can go into detail and try and rebut some of their points, but it doesn’t matter since at the end of the day it’s really as simple as I liked the game and they didn’t. Though that said their reasons for not liking it did get to me a bit.

  • Harry Butters

    I guess that’s a joke, but it’s not about being less repetitive. All games are repetitive, even the most lauded games of their time are. Having to hack shit in Bioshock all the time was pretty damn repetitive but it’s still one of my favorite games ever. If the alien or whatever is constantly on your heels, each little moment of “repetitiveness” is just as stressful as the last and as a player you may not see it as repetitive, you may see it as “shit shit shit open dammit open! It’s right behind me i know it go go hurry up!” I’m not saying this game is the best ever, I’m saying that Rich and Jack seemed to be confused why anyone would like this game at all, and the stress of constantly being hunted on a harder difficulty may be the reason it’s getting good reviews, and something they completely missed out on.

  • Noah R.

    Slow down, only on our Masters birthday may he be referred to as Dick…

  • Noah R.

    Why would you have been blocked?

  • Noah R.

    Obviously. Everybody knows that quote.

  • Like Icare

    Haven’t played the game and have no idea if that’s the case, but it may be an issue with the suspense element of the game if proper shading and effects are not available on the graphic card used.
    I.e. Shadows and lights don’t render properly and you end up seeing more than you should.

    It doesn’t seem to be the case though. And even if it was, it is not an excuse.

  • Mark Bisone

    His dick is most definitely not neutral.

  • stryker1121

    RLM crew dislikes AAA game shocker! More at 11.

  • Like Icare

    Original Half Life had a BRILLIANT AI for the time AND in comparison to HL2.
    Battles with the marines felt like finally there is more to the AI than blindly rushing at you until you kill it.
    They were flanking you, running around, they would drop a grenade as they died…

    HL2 enemies were all just zombies with different amounts of armor.

  • Like Icare

    There are androids in both of them.

  • Like Icare

    Why are you typing with your penis and what use is wrapping it in tin foil?
    Are you afraid of radiation? Then you should wrap your balls. With lead foil.

  • Rick_Berman

    Nice review, Just wondering is that Brain in the background your crocodile or lion brain?

  • FT

    The drop grenade and constant flanking, works very well for the indoor nature present in HL1. Moments in external maps are extremely limited for the Quake engine.

    The AI in HL1 is a good update over the Quake engine, licensed with id software. HL2 shows better AI, so many changes with models, events, path, triggers, scripts and a improved level editor, today the Souce Engine.

  • Malevolence

    If it was a fair review, it would be different; but in the first 5 minutes they make it seem like all you do is open doors and use your scanning device when you do that roughly .1 percent of the time. This review was the Michael Moore Production of game reviews.

  • A.I.

    … and the butt of the joke makes an appearance.

  • Jessey Bowman

    I would think a casual gamer who prefers a low difficulty can find a stupid A.I. just as frightening. Especially since casual gamers like to be much more expressive/emotional over their games. Because they’re not analyzing the game bit-by-bit, but rather just emoting every little thing (which is to say that even if the Pre:Rec guys are casual, they’re still analyzing the game bit-by-bit and comparing it to other gaming experiences for review purposes).

    However, I agree with you in that a flawless game-design does create more immersion, and thus makes it easier to feel afraid. But there’s hardly a game in existence that doesn’t have some kind of flaw. So instead of hating something for not being perfect, I’d rather enjoy something for not being horrible.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    pseudo-intellectual is generally hyphenated….

  • The president of space himself

  • Have to agree. Everything is enjoyable. Looking forward to these everytime. Actually watched it twice in a row.

    Violent dutch angle, out of focus, shakycam, closeups with background noise is an artform that is only mastered by a few. They need to get this fraud back asap.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    But Jack and Rich had the audacity to be “older” and express an opinion contrary to the op, so nuts to your facts.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    when are the going to review tetris for the first gen game boy?

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    That’s ‘office space cop’ to you.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    better than the penis of the joke.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    You can read the 50 page open letter of rambling insanity to find out. I tried but my brain killed itself 25% of the way through.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    I only half watched the review and even i understood that they had may issues with gameplay that had nothing to do with the scariness of the alien. Off the top of my head: sloppy stealth mechanics, dumb immersion-breaking ai, uninteresting filler quests, unchallenging and excessive minigames. lots of doors.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    Alien isolation: putting the ‘ambien’ in ‘ambience.’ (sic)

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    Malevolence • 3 months ago
    Woohoo, a new Previously Recorded!

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    So basically, ‘i disagree with their review, therefore they don’t love games and shouldn’t review them.’ They had a litany of complaints about gameplay and some about story.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    Winner by tko, robotbling.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    because internets

  • Joshua Norton

    The thing with bad games is that they’re not fun to play. Sounds simple, but bad TV and movies are passive experiences. Bad games are active, meaning you have to force yourself to go through boring sections, flailing at broken QTEs, and having to restart a level after a catastrophic crash.

  • rofl

    PC Gamer > Red Letter Media.

  • Bloomburger Metamycheese

    I wanna see Mike play video games while the others just sit around and watch him trying to figure it out. It could be a Star Trek/Wars whatever game to pull him in. I would pay good money to see that, you hack frauds.

  • netcrave

    Sounds as if you also only half read/understood my posting. My core hypothesis was, that they only complained about these things because the alien never scared them. Almost every game has weak points similar or even identical to those, but you don’t care about them if you buy into the general premise of the game. It’s pretty much like accepting certain things in movies as true and then minor problems don’t matter, but if you can’t do that, it all falls apart.

    Unrelated to that, it seems that they played on easy, which is the reason for the AI ignoring them when it otherwise wouldn’t. If they really played on the lowest difficulty, just so they could record the scene in which they stand exactly behind the alien without the alien noticing them, then this review is quite manipulative. You just don’t use such methods to seemingly prove a point.

  • Lional punsalot

    I exhausted everything I had to say on this game a while back, at this point im just doing a daily check to see what vitriol has appeared.

  • The Ghost

    Strong work. I didn’t get to chime in either, so I’m going to piggyback and add mine:

    We walked out into the parking lot after dinner. The dame said “Ooooo, honey, it’s awfully chilly outside.”

    I said “I know. I’m going home. Bye.”

  • possumGFX

    Hmm the horror in Alien:Isolation, for me, came from the fact that you had to fight a scary demon from outer space who was hunting you and you didnt know when and where it would strike and when it would see or not see you. In order to avoid to be killed you have to hide. You mentioned Dead Space and I agree it is not a stealth game but the big difference for most of the games you mentioned is that you actually possess means to defeat your opponents for the most part meaning weapons.The horror is actually more a visual and athmospherical one. Its about what could happen if you fail to kill the enemies before they reach you. Its the scenes of madness and violence you witness. In Alien:Isolation the main scare for me was that I knew exactly what would happen if the Alien would get me and the only way to prevent it from happeneing was hiding. Stealth is the logical choice to me and for the character of Amanda Ripley.

    Now after finishing the game I admit though I understand now the flaws mentioned in the eview but too they dont take away to much. The opposite sometimes. The fact you dont know always if you are actually hidden or not adds a lot to the tension allthough a gamers mind will find it frustrating as we mostly think its wether yes or no and whatever it is we need it to be communicated to us to be good at the game. Thats why Rich mentioned the “light crystal” from Thief. A:I fails often in just telling us that we are “hidden”. For example some furniture is cleary to low or has to many openings for you to be useful as cover yet the games logic handles them as a massive block against the Aliens “eyes”. For example in some sort of cafeteria you will be perfectly hidden behind a set of dish and stools who should be no obstacle to the Aliens senses at all. That is indeed something they could have solved better.

    Cheers and thank you for your reply.

  • testguy111

    so I supported you with what I thought was ammunition pro-redlettermedia by pointing out what they thought of as weird reviews for such a horrible game was pretty common in the games industry.
    I mentioned #gamergate, which is the very definition of this issue, and got censored.

    if you are censoring #gamergate you are not gamers, just a bunch of people trying to live off the community by doing weird faces and flat jokes on youtube about games.

    educate yourself or the community will come down on you like we did on gawker.
    gawker lost BMW, Mercedes Benz, Intel, Olympus, Adobe and many others.

    are you really that stupid? we know you’re a bunch of white middle class hipsters trying to suck up to feminists. but they are not your friends.

    you founded this site on a joke about murdering and raping women. do you really think it is in any way, shape or form justified to then go on and delete a post about corruption in games journalism?

    your behavior is of such hypocrisy, I don’t even know where to begin.
    this goes as a screenshot on twitter like the last post, if you censor it.

    have a nice day

  • Like Icare

    Something something implied sexual orientation something.

  • The Ghost

    I’m gonna go ahead and say that the RLM crew isn’t too worried about losing ad sales from the likes of BMW, Mercedes Benz, Intel, Olympus, Adobe and many others. So, using that as leverage in some type of inflated internet threat is nonsensical. They’re at liberty to do what they want with their web site. They aren’t beholden to sponsors, or their commenters.

  • testguy111

    lol. you don’t get it, do you. why do you think these companies backed down from supporting these censorship faschists?
    cause the #gamergate community dwarfs the social justice warrior crowd. the SJWs are just very loud. not very many.

    RLM lives off communities. well guess what: the community does not want censorship.

  • sciencemile

    I already told him to cut it out on twitter but apparently he’s continuing his little crusade.

    Cut it the fuck out, you posted a low content post the previous time that got flagged as spam, this isn’t some attack on your ideology, you’re just an asshole.

    #GamerGate doesn’t support you at this point, stop making us look bad with your personal vendettas.

  • The Ghost

    Mmmk man. Fight the fight. Do the thing.

  • testguy111

    so you support censorship. lol. look: you’ve always been on the fence about this really. so don’t pretend to speak for the community

  • sciencemile

    Deleting spam is not censorship.

  • CC

    Chill. GamerGate is NOT about harassment, threats, or namecalling, that makes you no better than a bully. Relax, and BE NICE.

    My apologies to RLM, GG is about ethical journalistic practices, and a few people are riled up, but by no means does it reflect all of us.

  • bretweir

    Thank you for this review… not I wont waste 18 hours of my life.

  • Lead Sharp

    You know when you read something and somehow your brain starts reading it in a voice you associate with the style of writing? EG, I read a Batman comic I hear Kevin Conroy for Batman’s speech.

    Well by the third paragraph of that post all I heard was Cartman.

  • Vengeful Eagle

    Creepy sex looks

  • Old Ben

    I wonder if Mike and Jay are like Prince and hoard their finished products so that the world will never see them. I bet they have a vault full of finished Plinkett reviews, Game Station 3.0, Feeding Frenzy 2-4, and the AVGN Quick Cuts.

  • cdxsza

    The problem with this review isn’t their opinion on the game. It’s that it veers away from the red letter media style of review and analysis, and into immature nerd rage.

    Mike and Jay do a great job of balancing the POVs of audience members and the movie industry. For a movie that had a few great scenes but couldn’t pull off a good movie overall, they would flesh out what worked, what didn’t, how the movie would’ve been better with modifications, etc. It’s been a great format for appreciating movies and giving credit when it’s due (and vice versa, of course!). A great example is Jay’s review of American Hustle (especially since it’s brief).

    With Pre-Rec, they’ve given some discussion about game production and how it relates to playing games (their sonic critique comes to mind). It’s worked before and got me to follow their videos.

    This review threw most of this “analytical but practical” format out by seeing some flaws as unforgivable and concluding, “This is what’s ruining games.” I think their focus on door simulation was clever, but (IMO) didn’t undo the success of atmosphere and experience throughout the game. Immature and short-sighted gamers are unable to weigh the pros and cons of a game and instead fixate on small issues. These reviewers are the ones spamming the internets with binary reviews of “fookin’ awesome!” and “shit sux.”

    If Jack and Rich want to avoid the format that’s made RLM successful, that’s fine. However, it’ll make look elsewhere for game reviews (and perhaps lower my patronage).

  • sciencemile

    For some reason reading what you said made me think of a hypothetical review of Minecraft done by Mr. Plinkett where he goes into deep analsis of everything 😛

  • dollar store cashier wife

    ur juszt an butthurtt aliens:doors simluatorr fanboii XD

  • Tiffany Gerik

    Hilarious review! I’ve watched it twice already. I don’t know why all these peeps in the comments are raging at y’all for not enjoying the game. Your video was great (my husband enjoyed too) and we like your opinions. I don’t know if you do fan requests but mine would be: King’s Bounty: Armored Princess. I am loving this game and my hubs just beat it in 2 days! It’s a mix of Heroes of Might and Magic and perhaps Warcraft. and it continues to surprise. Take care and I look forward to your next review!

  • BarryLegg

    Had you stopped to think that RLM is a place where the kind a game player might come who wants nothing to do with mainstream games journalism and the preposterous debates that are hammered out by those who self-identify as ‘gamers’?

    I am that person.

    I like games a lot. I grew up with games. I’m in my 30s. I have my opinions on feminism and what a woman’s role should be in the technology industry. But I chose to keep those opinions to myself.

    There’s a lot of people like me, believe it or not, who have *NOTHING* to gain and *NOTHING* to learn from being exposed to, educated by or engaged in the ‘gamergate’ debate.

    Please don’t try and force it on us. Keep it over on Kotaku, with the ‘gamers.’

  • NotRickBerman

    You just don’t like things that are different.

  • CitizenSnips2

    IGN and Gamespot gave it roughly 6 out of 10s. It has an 80 metacritic. Not bad but far from a perfect game that is universally loved.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Look, I don’t know what this little #gamergate organization of yours is, and I quite frankly don’t care, but what’s with all the pointless #hashtags? #Fuck

  • cdxsza

    Nope.

    The problem here was that this review *wasn’t* different in presentation from other game reviews online – short-sighted and fixated (for or against the game. It doesn’t matter). There are plenty of fanboy reviews of this game that only care that it’s a playable Alien franchise title, and ignore its pitfalls, which is just as stupid. Again, it doesn’t matter that they hated the game.

    Calling anything “the best/worst game ever”, “ruining the industry,” etc. should be reserved for special circumstances (colonial marines and Adam Sandler movies, eg). Throwing it around casually is for 13 year old “haxor bon3r farts” swinging their ASCII dicks online.

    If you value someone’s opinion enough to take their word (& possibly throw down $50), don’t you care whether they’re considering the big picture? If you watch their videos just for entertainment, then who cares. I’ll give pre-rec a pass on it, since they’ve done well before this video.

  • Jape

    You think you’re a freedom fighter being taken down by the man for speaking the truth? No you’re a drunk being kicked out of the bar because you’re yelling at everyone. You spam it gets removed. By all means say your piece but do it somewhere its relevant.

    And you’re threatening RLM, a small indie company dedicated to one of your beloved ‘communities’? Yeah, real power to the people stuff right there.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Why would you lower your patronage for Pre-Rec, though? Patreon money doesn’t support Pre-Rec. Their Twitch stream subscriptions, however, do.

  • cdxsza

    Not to Pre-Rec, to RLM who produces Pre-Rec. And I’d only do that if the rest of their reviews veer away from regular RLM quality. It’s one miss on their part, but out of a thousand successes, so it’s unlikely to continue. I just wanted to vent because this particular review was out of place from what they’ve previously made. “Not mad, just disappointed.”

  • The Ghost

    I think you missed it. He was doing like, a thing.

  • cdxsza

    Things, yes…*woosh*

  • Ogrot

    What are faschists? Are they like some kind of fashionable fascist or something?

    Given that you never comment here do you really think anyone is going to give a shit about your boycott. You’re like a vegan boycotting a butchershop, bro. No one fucking cares.

    Also this community isn’t filled with your MRA demographic of angry misguided lonely teenagers, old divorced men, and old bible thumpers pining for the good old days. So none of us give a shit about your anti feminist crusade and we’re not about to start. We’re just not that naive, nostalgic, or angry enough to give a fuck about that noise.

  • mmp

    You seem like a well intentioned person but the only problem is it’s just video games. Nobody cares about fucking politics and similar.

  • Ogrot

    So I guess you get angry every time Mike says, “This is the worst movie we’ve ever seen,” in HitB and BotW, too?

    Because Mike’s used that one for more than just the occasional Adam Sandler movie.

  • Corey Stoll’s wig

    Your ‘core hypothesis’ is just an opinion; that an intense emotional reaction compensates/covers for poor mechanics, repetitive gameplay, etc.. That’s just your personal opinion, and is in no way superior to Rich and Jack’s opinion that busted mechanics define their experience more than art design and graphics quality.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “bad TV and movies are passive experience” Clearly you’ve haven’t seen many bad shows and movies.

  • cdxsza

    Eh, they’ve said it mostly in jest. And the times they’ve fully criticized a movie, they backed it up convincingly.

    So, said a different way, Pre-Rec didn’t convince me that all their complaints with A:I outweighed the positives. I’m saying that this type of review combined with such a bold statement of, “this is what’s ruining the industry,” just wasn’t the same quality of critique in other RLM videos. Other reviews online gave more convincing arguments for/against parts of the game, better balance.

  • netcrave

    If you don’t feel like it matters to voice an opinion, then why are you stating yours to defend someone elses? Makes no sense.

  • Popo Bawa

    Sorry, but PC games were left in the dust by Windows games a few years ago.

  • Popo Bawa

    I vote for Goat Simulator!

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Hey guys, I’m a bit late to the party.

    What’d I miss? …

    http://i.minus.com/iflQGHz1TAJzP.gif

  • cdxsza

    Tetris: so repetitive. 1/10

  • Wizard Phoenix

    A lot has happened. Sully created an evil robot that wants to kill all humanity. Rich Evans likes to wear panties. And apparently I am Wizard Chick…I still don’t know what the fuck that means.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    After watching Joss Delgado’s newest movie trailer for Avengers: Age of Ultron I had a thought. Can you imagine little kids who went and saw the first film with it’s silly plot, light, and comical villain watching a film with horror vibes and a villain that wants to eradicate the human race? I would laugh so hard.
    “Mommy, what’s human eradication? How come the robots are the killing the people? What’s a rape experiment?”

  • Alex Lee

    I think part of the problem is because this game used a bit too much FPS logic in what is essentially a puzzle game (such as the motion tracker and waypoint designator).

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UC22ZF21Llk

  • Joshua Norton

    I’ve done Manos. Unriffed, no lube, Final Destination, Fox Only.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i think you might need some brain medicine.

  • Miika Kuusisto

    I think that from this moment on I am going to try to avoid comment sections even more than I have done before.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i know. bile is hilarious!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its strange there seems to be only you whinging about it…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Manos is no Battlefield Earth and the Final Destination movies are funny as hell.

  • Rene Belloq 12 inch Figure

    WHERE’S THE HALLOWEEN BOTW.

  • Some random asshole

    Man I hate to say it but Previously recorded is going to die soon if they don’t change they’re ways. Now I love that these two have been reviewing games but they only seem to play Indie games and for the most part they complain about them. Every review I’ve seen so far has been a negative review, Mike and Jay give some positive reviews for movies that come out ,but with this previously recorded they seem to hate every game they play and even if they do like it they nitpick the crap out of it rather than actually balancing out the pros and cons of each title. I was surprised by alien isolation, I thought the game was good personally, I never would have thought of it being hated by these guys, they act like it’s the worst game they’ve ever played. Guess they have never played colonial marines. I want to keep watching they’re show but they gotta pace out there reviews a bit, bashing games isn’t a review. Going over the fundamentals of why they think it’s bad is.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    probably come out on the 30th

  • BarryLegg

    Please learn the difference between ‘they’re’ and ‘their.’

    Also please learn the difference between ‘yourself’ and ‘other people.’

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Risk of Rain, Guacamelee, Invisible Inc., Mario Kart 8. Not negative reviews.

    Negative: Banner Saga, Alien: Isolation, Titanfall, Sonic.

    Unless math fails me, that’s a 50-50 rate for negative and positive reviews.

    They’ve also reviewed 4 indie games and 4 AAA games. That’s where you can see a trend. Only 1 high-profile game got a thumbs up, while only 1 indie game got the thumbs down.

  • lazorexplosion

    Great review, well justified and entertaining.

  • Michael Collins

    So they’ve reviewed 8 shit games, and liked 4 of them?

    Kewl

  • brak3000

    hey man, good comment that totally has to do with alien isolation

  • Opus131

    “Also this community isn’t filled with your MRA demographic of angry misguided lonely teenagers, old divorced men, and old bible thumpers pining for the good old days. So none of us give a shit about your anti feminist crusade and we’re not about to start. We’re just not that naive, nostalgic, or angry enough to give a fuck about that noise.”

    But it is apparently filled with ignorant leftist rags. I’m sorry, but if you want to generalize you might want to learn how to take it as well.

    From what i understand it seems to me testguy11 is being a bit paranoid and quite misguided here, but his reaction, while exaggerated and probably counterproductive, is a direct result of what has actually been happening over at #gamergate, where a corrupt gaming press has been using every trick in the book to divert attention from their own lack of ethics and agenda driven brainwashing attempts by attacking their own reader base in every which way possible, and by stifling all discussion with their mass censorship and control of all media outlets. By referring to #gamergate as “anti feminist”, you are yourself relying on one of their lies.

    As for you testguy11, i would recommend you learn how to chose your targets, particularly when taking this issue outside the gaming sphere. Nobody likes a zealot, doesn’t matter if what they are saying is true or not.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    am i the only one who saw the X-Com review?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    hey arsehole its not a review site its an opinion site.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    so many dicks it makes a gay night club look like a vagina!….. to soon?

  • Joe Syxpac

    A gay night club is like a vagina.

    I’m not welcome in either one.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i thought it was because like Monkey you were borne from an egg….
    http://youtu.be/OS_5BORSayc

  • Joe Syxpac

    I never got the impression that the android in Alien was supposed to be vastly superior to humans with a greater sensory array. He was stronger, but I always figured that was a byproduct of being mechanical. He was just supposed to blend in with the humans and protect the corporate interests. If they made him a superman than he would stand out as different.

    Of course he would have a more analytical mind than the alien, so checking a locker that a human can fit in would make sense.

    Now what would have made the game interesting would be if different hiding places worked better or worse depending on who was stalking you.

  • Duckler

    “I’m wearing panties..”

  • Joe Syxpac

  • WrongWithYourFace
  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    like the song says… “To many dicks, not enough chicks…”
    i think there is something in that for all of us….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    he needs no reason for his posts! he is wizard! we ask no more of him…

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i still think your Doctor Who.

  • Lional punsalot

    I find it amusing that people talk about shit as if they know what they
    are talking about when every “fact” they state is provably a complete
    lie based on ignorance.

    It really tickles my lion brain.

  • Lional punsalot

    Avengers: Age of Ultron is a great movie, you obviously didn’t watch the trailer on a good enough PC to really enjoy it, or you had it playing on non high def like a casual.

    How dare you have a detracting opinion about a movie where the producers are obviously taking a risk in making a more dark more adult theme, you obviously dont like kids watching anything with horror in it.

    What about star wars where a guy gets his legs cut off and then is horribly burnt by lava and put in a metal suit. I didn’t see you complaining about how that was too terrifying for kids.

    (if you cant tell im doing a thing)

  • Lional punsalot

    You might have only just found RLM but we have been here a long time and we comment about whatever the fuck we want to, wherever the fuck we want to.

    You can leave if this upsets you.

  • Lional punsalot

    It means you need to learn lessons of life. Look crocodile brain, like lion brain its human nature. Dont talk about stuff that you dont like. Stupid dumb fat skinny wizard chick.

  • Lional punsalot

    OK stop being a fucking moron, they played the game, didnt enjoy playing the game, then created a video in which they sat and discussed WHY they thought THEY did not enjoy the game.

    They weren’t trying to convince anyone not to enjoy the game, they werent trying to get noteriety for shitting on an acclaimed game. They were expressing their fucking opinion.

    I and many others appreciate their opinion and even agree with it, and I like that they give an opinion despite not being experts in the gaming field. This is because I like to hear what their opinion is, not because I think they will have technical insights.

    Half in the bag is a very different program to pre recorded, its even got a different format and different editing and is actually mainly hosted on twitch and youtube, and is only linked on RLM. They get no money from patreon, they get their money from twitch and youtube.

    Every last thing you have said is childish bullshit. “im gonna hold my breath until you guys hold the same opinion as me”

    So fucking sad.

    Just saying,

  • and their review of banner saga made me atleast want to check it out…it wasn’t entirely negative

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Do you think movie franchises should grow with kids, or stay stagnant?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    like our god said!!!!

  • Lional punsalot

    They dont do this to get popular they do this because they enjoy games and talking about games. They dont intend to be a critical review show because they are not experts in the field, they enjoy games as a hobby, Then make their hobbies into shows for us to enjoy.

    And we do enjoy them, which is why we know that half the games they reviewed they loved or liked and which is why we know you are talking out of your ass.

    They gave alien isolation a bad “review” because they played it and hate playing it, so then felt they had to nitpick why they hated it rather than just putting out a show where they said “we didn’t like alien but we aren’t going to say why”. That seems to be what you are asking for and you are a fucking moron for more reasons than i have even bothered to explain.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    Your sad version of #Gamergate, sounds more like the deranged ranting of a 12 year old that wants to grow up to be a rapist….
    women WANT to fuck real men. if you have to force them your not a man.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i miss AvP 2010.

  • NotRickBerman

    Still a better love story than Twilight.

  • NotRickBerman

    Whaaaaaaat?

    Oh, Who.

    Nevermind.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You must be new here

  • Charon

    After watching this, and researching some of the more contemporary trends in video games and reviews, it all makes sense now. This is why Pre-Rec and shows like it have so much potential, yet are undercut by their own contradictory nature.

    http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/jimquisition/9782-Shadow-of-Mordors-Promotion-Deals-with-Plaid-Social

    Yeah, (insert title here) is the worst title evar, especially when you’re defining your tastes and creating content at the behest of your AAA masters.

    Slob that Nintendo knob a little bit more, why don’tcha? 0_o

  • Charon

    With a witty, original name like “Lucusfarts” (Lucas not spelled correctly, perhaps due to availability), you can expect a little banality and mediocrity.

  • Charon

    Yeah, make him play Star Trek: Klingon Academy for Win95. He’ll be addicted by morning.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I had this dream about you. You were trying to impress these 6 women with an elaborate dinner party, but your table was too small for a proper place setting for each. You asked me through Disqus how best to solve this situation. I kept telling you to use sporks in place of regular silverware, but you wanted to use smaller plates instead. We got into a big internet fight about it, with everyone chipping saying my advice made more sense.

    Then I woke up.

  • Lional punsalot

    The best you have is to attack my name? fucking pathetic.

  • Bloomburger Metamycheese

    make him play a game where you can beat the kobayashi maru. that’ll piss him down

  • Square Peg

    So you’re implying they gave a bad review some game where you wander around boring samey corridors doing piss-easy but monotonous puzzles to open doors and hiding from a floating muppet monster for 20 blistering hours because they’re, what, secretly taking money under the table from Nintendo?

  • Like Icare
  • Big Mclargehuge

    That’s not being cool about fire safety.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    FPS logic? You mean shoot?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Just one question … what’s a ‘women’?

  • Future-Bound-Entertainment

    I disagree with your opinion, but I understand and respect it.

  • Opus131

    I miss AvP 1999.

  • The Ghost

    Well, if you like anything made by Nintendo – ever – you’re automatically a slobbering fanboy who will blindly praise anything they do. You can’t casually enjoy a Nintendo game. It’s forbidden by the Internet. Also, let’s deliberately ignore the fact that Jack and Rich have spent almost every Twitch stream playing games NOT made by Nintendo.

    Oh and, while we’re at it, you can’t criticize anything popular, because then you’re just trying to make a name for yourself.

  • cdxsza

    Ooh, internet argument. I’ve heard of these…

    I never said it was about their content, but the way they reviewed it. I’ve said that in nearly every comment I’ve posted, you product of incest. So let’s break this down:

    It boils down to how Pre-Rec should fit in with RLM. It’s still relatively new and not as popular as other programs from RLM (to my knowledge). If you (with extra/omitted chromosomes) only like game reviews where hosts offer entertainment more than a thoughtful review, there’s plenty of that elsewhere online.

    E.g., go to Google and mash the keyboard with your knuckles. You’ll find tons of results. (Now, I’m assuming you have distinctive keyboard pummeling so that Google can interpret it via your profile. If not, open “Ok, Google” and scream-cry, as you do.)

    On the other hand, Pre-Rec could give thorough reviews, like they do with virtually every program they offer. Up until this review, I’d say they were achieving that. Since I’ve followed RLM for years now, I’d hope they stick with the quality that’s earned them fans. And on top of that, if you donate via Patreon (& you should), then you want that money to continue making the RLM products you’ve enjoyed. (By the way, I’m assuming funds from RLM flow into Pre-Rec, since they’re hosted here. If not, prove it.)

    This review didn’t live up to the standards RLM set for themselves. What better way to communicate this to them by posting on the video’s message board.

    To put it another way, they panned immersion in games. That’s fine to have that opinion, but if I’m going to listen to it, it better explain why immersion is “ruining the industry.” They didn’t, and so the video was more flat opinion (“I don’t like immersion”) than a carefully explained view point, which I would’ve respected. I’m simplifying it some because I’ve made my point, and you’ll eventually be able to parse it, you “fucking moron.”

  • Sully

    I wish they’d never of crossed those two stories. There’s an entire generation of kids now that can’t appreciate either monster for its own merits because of those stupid crossovers.

    Predator was great (the 1st film)
    Alien and Aliens were great. Alien3 was… okay.
    (I actually got to read the original unproduced version of Fincher’s Alien film, and it was so much better than what was made, which Fincher freely admits. Alien3 was the product of what happens when Producers get in the way of talent).

  • atheistconservative

    Dude, shut up. Seriously. Removing posts by an annoying troll is not censorship, and you do not speak for ‘gamergate’. You speak for yourself.

    People like you are worse than cancer. It reminds me of the time I went to an Oakland A’s game, and was sitting with a bunch of ‘true fans’. They were playing the Mariners and the ‘true fans’ started yelling racial insults at Ichiro. I took exception, and the ‘true fans’ insisted that if I was a ‘true fan’ then I’d be perfectly fine with calling Ichiro racist names. It’s part of the game!

    A dick is a dick no matter what ’cause’ he pretends to align with. You, sir, are a dick. You harm the real issues gamergate wants to bring to light with your dicketry.

  • Lional punsalot

    “it boils down to where pre rec fits in with RLM” bullshit, why should it need to fit it? There is absolutely no need for it to fit in at all. There may be other sources for entertainment but I, and others want to hear what rich and jack have to say on games, i cant get that anywhere but here. Again they dont need to fit into RLM they are even self funded and dont need to be as popular because they are doing something they like doing, and people like me enjoying watching.

    I dont give a fuck what you think pre rec could be, I care what jack and rich want to make. Just because they aren’t doing the same level of critique that RLM produces doesn’t mean it isn’t quality, and again, its not an RLM based program, its a separate entity which is why the videos are hosted on you tube and only linked here.

    Your desire to have a show that critically reviews games could be found elsewhere using google as you are so clearly aware.

    You have made no other point than “wah fucking wah they aren’t doing what I want them to be doing” So fucking what? What makes your needs so important that they should change or stop making the show they have decided to make?

    Again I repeat many people enjoy pre rec despite the fact they are not experts in the field. We enjoy hearing their “flat opinions”

    The fact you aren’t one of those people means fucking nothing to anyone but you. And you are a self entitled prick that cant just ignore something you dont personally enjoy you have to try and shit on it for no reason.

    And is it a surprise you chose this specific video? Nope not really.

  • Ogrot

    Hi Opus. Lot of assumptions going on here so let me clarify all the reasons you are wrong.

    1st, Test is the one who brought up feminism by calling the RLM folks middle class white people sucking up to feminists for censoring his material. You may not think of #gamergate as battling with feminists, but there is no doubt from his posts that Testuser does. I simply reacted to the shit he slung by explaining why it will be a waste of his time continuing to try and peddle it. Your cause would be better served if he just shut’s the fuck up and moves on to some other outrage to associate himself with.

    2nd, a leftist rag would be a fucking newspaper with a liberal bias. Learn what your political slurs mean before you use them in anger. You’d sound less ignorant that way.

    3rd. Protip, if your purpose is to convince an audience toward your point of view as evidenced by the sermon after the liberal rag remark, you may not want to lead off by labeling them with a slur no matter how misused it actually is.

    4th. Do not try and throw the third point in my face. My purpose was not to convince testguy to my point of view. He can go make as many youtube videos or tweets about the femocracy ruining his life as he pleases. I hoped merely to inform him why he’s wasting his time here while also pointing out how much of a twat he is.

    5th. No where did I say #gamergate. You may want to consider the unsaid as unsaid instead implied in future debates. I was talking about testguy personally as evidenced by his postings here.

    6th. Not a liberal and completely apathetic to that flamewar masquerading as a debate on twitter. And before you go assuming I’m exclusively knocking your #gamergate people. Not quite. I mean a pox on both your stupid houses your’s and the tumblr teenagers that fancy themselves activists because they yell at people in CAPS on twitter.

    Anyway enjoy the good fight. And have fun storming the castle or whatever it is you kids do these days.

  • cdxsza

    Why would you care about the opinion of two 30-40 year old dudes you know little about? There’s an internet’s worth of game discussion out there, so pick something that’s worth your time. If your time is only worth hearing unsupported opinion with loud sounds and flashing lights, then you’re the ignorant audience member panned in HitB that lives off bullshit. Why are you even here if you want low quality opinion pieces? Go jerk off to old G4 videos and forget that your mom is also your aunt.

    I’ve said what I wanted. It’s been fun. Lucasfarts (good name BTW) has brought up some interesting points to which I leave him the following oatmeal:

    http://s3.amazonaws.com/theoatmeal-img/comics/online_gaming/2.jpg

  • Lional punsalot

    I care about their opinion because I have grown to like them as people from seeing them in other things and think they are entertaining.

    Simple as that.

  • Palpatine
  • Now I Get It

    Your brother told him of your interests: the Marquis de Sade, games of leather, weekends of fun, a medicinal eye patch.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I’m not sure. Aren’t women those things that are ruining the Ghostbusters franchise?

  • Lional punsalot

    What the hell is this, reason? on the internet?

  • NotRickBerman

    This is SPARTA!

  • NotRickBerman

    That’s what she said.

  • Stefano Cecconi

    Guys, if the game really is 20 hours than WOW, you are just right. I remember at the E3 they were talking on about how the game was gonna last 1.5 hours. I remember a demo with a ship fallen on a planet and partly submerged with major damages all over the place. The fact that you had 1.5 hours was due to the fact that that was the time the Alien in the first movie took to lose his patience. How did this ended up 20 hours? Where is the replay value because “the time given won’t allow you to explore everything on the ship, so having an NG+ i kinda obligatory.” It’s not the game they presented at E3, and if it is, they lied pretty out loud.

  • Lional punsalot

    there is a very short cameo on a planet with a ship, most of the game takes place on a space station and really is 20 hours long.

    As for exploration, you can explore, kind of because you usually need “item x” in order to actually do it and that item is probably something you get late in the game. And when I say explore what i mean is that you can access a room with something in it that you want or need. Exploration is deliberately impeded in order to force you down the path the developers set out.

    In general you are on a railroad being lead through the station on a specific path (which unless you have the right tools you cant deviate from). And that path will have you waiting in closets or vents for the AI to move the NPCs off.

    In other words, if what you say is accurate then they lied.

    Harping on this point to speak to one of my problems with this game is how immersion breaking it is to be on a set path.

    If I came up to a makeshift barrier in real life made up from furniture and crap, I would break my way through or climb over or through. But because its a game I have to find the vent and go around the few bits of furniture lined up to prevent you accessing the area your looking at.

    This is what I mean when I talk about immersion breaking. They could have created a barrier that you literally could not break through and would understably have to go around, instead they left barriers anyone with a working body could traverse but you have to go around anyway because thats what the developers wanted you to do.

    This takes me out of the game more than the door bullshit, this smacks me in the face as im playing and says “hey this is a game your playing, you cant go where you would go in real life you have to go where we tell you that you can go because we wanted to control your experience in order to unravel a prewritten story to you in a specific order and we cant have you thinking for yourself and skipping parts of the story by going left instead of right.”

    Fuck this game.

  • brak3000

    apologies for questioning RLM comment section celebrity Wizard Phoenix

  • brak3000

    so you guys just hang out in the comments section of RLM and say stupid boring shit? yeah i guess i should probably go then

  • Lional punsalot

    Yes we do, and yes you should.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i miss the arcade game.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “My brother is a better commenter than me”
    -Stupid Wizard, 19XX-2014

  • David Anderson

    What a strange person!

  • atheistconservative

    What did you find to be the ‘success of atmosphere and experience’ in the game? The ankle-high suitcases you couldn’t walk over? The invisible walls? The shiny, 2005-era graphics? The long stretches of boredom? The terrible, unscary alien?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Ouija has come to rape the senses, mind, and logic of a movie theater audience. If you hack frauds don’t review it I’ll complain on the internet.

  • Sully

    But if they review it, there will still be complaining on the internet, so…

  • Ogrot

    Ouija is the new scam from Director something something and written by the sister of noted traitor Eliot Snowden. The movie stars actors and was edited on a computer… somewhere. This movie is the latest film in a series of very low budget films designed to look like real movies, and be released in theatres to make a quick buck via a horribly off kilter budget to profit ratio that the general public seems to be stupidly unaware of. These films used to be called direct to video, but now they are called first run features. These films then vanish from the theatres like a rapist from the scene of a crime. So Wizard what did you think of The Devil Inside Witchboard Ouija?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    I don’t know. Some of the Dark Horse comic series were good, the first few games were pretty decent. No one complained about pitting Aliens againt Predator until the stupid movies came along. It’s a shame Fox only cared about making a couple quick cash-grabs, instead of making an effort to do something decent.

  • Sully

    I complained. I complained so hard.

    It felt like a cash grab from the beginning.
    Don’t get me wrong, there’s potential, and in the right writers hands, it could’ve been something truly awe inspiring, but alas… here we are.
    But you’re right. The movies drove the final nail in the coffin. As soon as Not-Paul Anderson said he wanted to see the Xenomorph on Earth, because “it’s something we’ve never seen before.” I remember thinking… ooooohhhhh fuuuuuuuccccck!
    THERE’S A REASON WE’VE NEVER SEEN THEM ON EARTH, MOTHERFUCKER! IT’S KINDA THE WHOLE POINT OF THE FUCKING PLOTS!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Oh but they’re not there…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I liked it the way I like streetlights.

  • Jape

    You could see elements of creativity in the first AvP film but I think that was the few passionate people involved slipping stuff by the producers. I liked the whole ancient astronaut thing, the whaling station, has a Lovecraftian vibe. Problem is those ideas are neat but they don’t equal a great film. When it became a buddy movie I almost cried.

    Then in AvP 2 they turned the xenomorph into a slasher villain picking off dopey teens at which point what can you do. And fuck the predalien, sounds like a Belgian chocolate.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You are an annoying troll. You are not Internet Aristocrat or Adam Baldwin. You are not sending a message. Also I informed everyone here about Zoe Quinn before and we said “Well that’s bullshit and we don’t like it.” We didn’t do anything about it but we make jokes about it. While GamerGate is important here it is not and we know what the fuck it is by now. Go 8chan, KnowYourMeme or whatever but don’t go here. We know what it is, and we hate the sites that support censorship because that’s stupid and what they write is stupid, hence why we don’t like Kotaku. That and they introduced RLM to their annoying ass fans. Removing you’re stupid posts is censorship, it’s actual moderation because you won’t shut the fuck up. Stop shoving it down our throats, you annoying donkey thing.

    I ran out of insults. Someone help me.

  • Sully

    There will be…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Alien and Predator were two great movies that my dad made me watch when I was a kid. I was maybe seven when I saw Alien, yeah seven. As a kid I remember the haunting yet beautiful images of the crew walking around on the ship, the Lovecraftian atmosphere always stayed in my mind. The music and camera placement is hypnotically beautiful which contrasts with the terror of the alien itself.

    Predator I watched when I was 8 or 9. It was the first film to get to say dirty language. The brilliance of Predator is that it starts out like a routine, generic action film and then there are skinned bodies. That emphasizes that not only is it a clever action film it is also a horror film. What makes the jungle just as scary as a space ship is the Predator. He’s an expert killer that can be basically invisible. It’s open field and you can’t see your target, to make it worse the target wants to kill you. If that doesn’t fucking scare you need to get your fucking head checked.

    It’s a shame that now with those fucking movies and video games and comics that kids don’t understand what made these two movies pop culture icons. All they see is “Hey where is the Predator” or “Where is the Alien?” Thanks for ruining two of my favorite movies, Paul WS Anderson you asshole.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Wise he is not

  • Sully

    The xenomorph on Earth was fucking dumb. That’s what killed it. The concept was DOA.

    Here’s my pitch for what *could’ve* worked:

    There’s a space colony, maybe even a space station. They’re sent to investigate some bullshit and come across a xenomorph hive, leaving shit with nothing to do but ensue.
    Colonial Marines are called in to check on the colony after contact is cut off.
    The Marines battle the aliens, get their asses handed to them, and then realize there might be some *other* alien presence on the planet/station. From there, the humans are caught between the xenomorphs and the Yautja (Predators), who are just seeking a few trophies from the baddest apex predators in the universe.

    Anything could’ve worked, but there are some rules that needed to be kept in line with in order to have a working AVP franchise:

    1. Keep the aliens in the future, and away from Earth.
    2. Keep the predators lean and mean. The hulking wrestler looking Yautja in AVP looked slow and awkward.
    3. Keep the humans where they belong, without a fucking prayer.
    4. Make it suspenseful for fucksake! No one needs to see a monster on screen every twelve fucking seconds.
    5. Don’t let Not-Paul Anderson anywhere near the set.

  • atahualpa

    What, you have a problem with divorced men? Oh, its a demographic for you? One that you somehow disprove of for some stupid political alignment reason? Fuck you man, fuck you.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    In the behind the scenes for AVP you can tell that Paul Thomas-I mean Paul WS Anderson has a clear love for the atmosphere and Lovecraft like mystery of the first Alien film, the action of Predator and Aliens, and a love of practical effects. You can see some of that in the film, and then you have the horrible CG and slow motion garbage.

    With the second film it’s just a Friday the 13th movie only with Aliens and Predators and a stupid hybrid. By the way that doesn’t make anysense. Even in Alien 3 it didn’t any sense. How come the alien when it bursts out of anything except a dog or a predator it’s normal but when it is predator or a dog it is some weird hybrid? Why? How come it does that? Is it because of the black goo from Prometheus? What was the black goo?

  • Palpatine

    Chicken leads to egg, egg leads to omelette, omelette leads to fecal urgency.

  • Wizard Phoenix

  • Pokes404

    Still love this game. It really takes me back to that feeling of watching the original movies. One thing I’ve found though, is that if you want it to be as scary as possible, yes, you play in the dark with the sound turned up. However, playing with others in the room is a really fun experience. People jumping at every little noise, freaking out when the motion tracker starts going off, and that sense of relief everyone feels when you pass a stage. I was kind of hoping they would play together and see if it took some of the monotony out of those sections of the game where the developers are clearly just milking it for all it’s worth.

    When this game was first announced, a lot of people online were talking about how they didn’t see how this game could be more than 5-6 hours and hoped they’d get a longer experience than that. I was one of the few who was actually hoping for a shorter campaign. I knew that trying to stretch this thing out would be a bad idea, and unfortunately, that’s what happened. There was no point in artificially trying to prolong the campaign. The whole point of the game was to be alone, trying to evade the Alien. The problem is that being hunted by the Alien is stressful and the game runs the risk of overstaying it’s welcome if it goes on too long (which it did).

    As I said, I still really like the game. I think after AVP2, AVP 2010, & Colonial Marines turned the Aliens into cannon fodder, it was nice to be reminded that they are in fact a really menacing presence. It actually restored some of the dignity of the Alien for me personally. I also thought the sound, lighting, and environments were all really well crafted. It really put you in that universe. True, the Alien isn’t animated perfectly, but I still bought into the illusion and thought the character model looked very good. I don’t know how these two got away with some of those “hiding spots” in the review because that hasn’t been the case during my play through. I’ve had one instance where the Alien saw me when he probably shouldn’t have (smelled me maybe?), but I haven’t had any instances where he should have seen me and didn’t.

    Again, I really loved the game, but I completely understand those who don’t. Where some see atmosphere and tension, others see backtracking, opening doors, and standing in lockers. Both views are valid. I don’t think I’ve seen a game where personal taste factored so heavily towards the enjoyment, or torment, of playing it.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    more rape jokes you #gamergate people are fucked!… oh wait, sorry wizard…

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    killing Mitchell Taco Nash’s father?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    if you post it they will cum. (sic)

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Too soon, man …

    In fact, he’s now haunting me as a ghost.

    Fuck off, ghost!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    who you gonna call?

  • Palpatine

    Melisa McCarthy ghostbuster! Oh wait, I already used that joke.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i’ll set em up palpy, you knockemdown!

  • Wizard Phoenix

    You see I tied your father to a tree-oh wait I didn’t tie him to a tree I put your father through a tree. I’m sorry I get things confused.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    it was a lamp post!… wait still to soon?

  • Sully

    You’re supposed to cook the eggs, Palpy.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    I don’t buy it. My dad knew all about tree safety.

    Oh, wait, that was tree STAND safety. My bad.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Wait, you’re dad was the guy on the cover?! WHHHAAAAT?!

    http://www.retro-daze.org/ScifiAndOther/Other/T/TREE-STAND-SAFETY.jpg

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Considering how strange we all seem to be it’s strange how some of us have social lives which includes wives and girlfriends.

  • Stefano Cecconi

    http://blogs.sega.com/2014/03/13/all-new-alien-isolation-video- creating-the-alien/

    The first entry in the SEGA Blog about Alien Isolation. Doesn’t seem like it was supposed to be shorter and really only you and the alien? And isn’t that a deck instead of a control room?
    Eh, Exactly.

  • omitted

    I hope the RLM guys don’t release anything new this weekend just because I’m a bit occupied at the moment. One might even say I’m Beyond Earth…

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    I’m a bit occupied at the moment too… but i’m just watching porn…

  • Lional punsalot

    I am not entirely sure what you are saying here, but what I can say is that

    spoilers***

    There is one alien for a part of the game, then there are multiple aliens for the rest.

    There are a couple times when you have to climb into a shuttle and “fly it” from one part of the station to another, but they look nothing like the deck of the landing ship that detaches from the ship in Alien.

    Seems like they had an idea for a game, started making it and then either got told to make it different or decided the idea sucked.

    Either way, I cant match the blurb to the game.

  • Lional punsalot

    I am a bit unoccupied atm but thats because of the slaves I keep chained in my basement doing all my work for me so I can watch more porn and laugh at internet comments.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    see thats australias problem… we dont have cellars….
    we got bloody huge sheds though….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i cannot let it go….
    #Gamergate people are stupid!!! did you really think cash for comments wasnt a thing?
    did you think some how yours was the one entertainment industry based on love of the product?
    GAMES=MONEY you dumb fucks!
    also threatening to rape women is not funny you sick cunts!
    please crawl up your game hole and die.

  • Taft you FUCK

    The first Aliens vs predator comic series, from ’91, was amazing. Still a great read even today. They even shoehorned elements of that story into the first AVP flick (unsuccessfully I might add). I was excited for the movie because of the comic. I was led astray.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    he has a message for you.

  • Opus131

    It is SJWs who are stupid, and this is why they are losing this battle.

    Case in point, you are telling us that corruption in gaming journalism actually exists (admitting that #gamergate is in fact about corruption, which it is, among other things mind you), and then go on repeating the blatant lying narrative that #gamergate is about “threatening to rape women”, which is what gaming journalists have been using to deflect criticism away from their own cronyism and bullying antics (for which they are paying by losing advertising revenue).

    But see, we wouldn’t want to have facts get in the way of our ideologically laden narratives, would we? Much easy to dismiss us with an hasty brush stroke, call us names, tell us we are despicable people, and try to shut us down in every way possible rather than engage our arguments in a fair and balanced manner.

    SJWs is what happens when feelings alone drive reason, no more, no less. You are incapable of objectivity and seeing reality for what it is. It just so happens some of us have a little more respect for human intelligence than that.

  • Opus131

    I’m still being haunted by the implied human-predator romance at the end of the first AvP.

    In regards to Alien, it seems that nobody is able to recapture the atmosphere of that film, and this includes this game to be frank (despite its visual fidelity to the movie).

    I think i was 8 years old as well when i first saw the film, and it is really all about the experience conjured by the atmosphere. The coldness and vastness of space, the alieness of the Alien. It is very hard to describe. And i think the music helped too, the score being no doubt inspired by Ligeti’s Adventures, which was used in 2001.

  • Lional punsalot

    Both are true, firstly gamergate has a point about how corrupt journalism is, not just gaming journalism, all journalism, your narrow view of the world is pathetic on this point.

    Its also probably true that you assholes threatened to rape and kill women. It doesnt take all of you to do it, just one of you needs to have while calling himself a part of your fucking pathetic little “crusade”.

    Good luck with trying to convince everyone your the good guys, it will never work.

  • Michael Collins

    Don’t make me rage quit these comments, cause I’ll fucking do it!

    hahahaha, rage quit,so funny, I nearly smashed my gamepad yesterday trying to rage quit a racing game..

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    yeah we had a “rape fan #gamer” here. they exist.
    and i say again. did you really think publishing company’s are not in financial arrangements with game developers? are you really that stupid?
    like movies and tv and books and music if there is money there is corruption. games are not a free realm of sharing and love, its a business full of hate and dickheads.

  • Opus131

    Probably? As in, you have no facts to back your claims but you still *feel* that those accusations are true? Way to prove my point buddy.

    Sorry, it is not true in any way or form that #gamergate is about threatening to rape and kill women (how can anyone believe such an absurdity anyway?). Case in point, we have actual women on our side, hence, why the tag #notyourshield was created. Here’s a few of them being interviewed by The Huffington Post, in case you are curious:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/15/female-gamers-gamergate_n_5990310.html

    And FYI, we ARE in fact the good guys in this situation. But i suppose it is useless to convince someone who’s mind is already made up and is not willing to listen to any argument that opposes the particular preconceived narrative he has accepted, that all gamers are evil misogynists or racist or that we are all white males (who’s being racist now?) and other absurd notions of that kind.

    You know, i believe that might just be the dictionary definition of a bigot, irony of ironies.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    yeah and your desperate claims to be the good guy ring true with your trolling rants. But i suppose it is useless to convince someone who’s mind is already made up and is not willing to listen to any argument that opposes the particular preconceived narrative you have accepted

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    and if you want to know why we believe it. its because we have had heaps of #gmerRapefan’s on this page. its not hard to believe shit you can scroll down and read.

  • Opus131

    There a trolls on the internet? My, stop the presses!

    I find it quite telling though that this is essentially your only and sole line of argument. But the implication is of course untenable if you look at the matter logically. There are thousands upon thousands of gamers, but only an handful of trolls. How do you explain this discrepancy? If their behavior truly represents the aims and goals of #gamergate, why aren’t there thousands upon thousands of trolls? In fact, as i recall, several of those cases of so called “harassment” turned out to be actual hoaxes. So apparently the number of actual trolls (BTW, you do realize there are trolls on both sides, right?) is so small they had to fake a few in order to maintain this ridiculous narrative they are spinning. As if it isn’t in itself absurd to claim gamers are nothing but woman haters, or worse yet, rapists and murderers!

    Come on now, let’s get a grip on reality here, shall we? If your perception of what #gamergate is about are the actions of a random troll here, than i urge not to be so quick to heap judgement over an entire group because of the actions of a single person or a few individuals. This entire situation is very heated right now and when emotions run high, the judgement of individuals can become clouded. The facts of the situation remain however what they are, and big idealist that i am, i think the truth in the end shall prevail. *chime in epic music*

  • Lional punsalot

    You seem to think I give a fuck about your quest.

    I dont.

  • Lional punsalot

    Your argument is known as “no true Scotsman”, it means that you are saying all the people who argue on your side using the “we will rape and kill women” line are not truly a part of your crusade but are just trolls.

    You might be an idealist but a large amount of your fellow crusaders are not, and they are the ones people notice, not you.

    Are they trolls? How would anyone know, even you, whether they are being serious? How would we tell you apart from them when they are calling themselves one of you?

    No true Scotsman, look it up.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    again. not to get in the way of your massive rants.
    but my main point is… wait for it.
    IF YOU DIDNT KNOW ALL OPINIONS ARE BOUGHT AND PAID FOR AND THOUGHT GAMES WHERE FREE OF THE DIRTY HAND OF CORRUPTION YOU ARE STUPID!!!!.
    and as for trolls… welcome to RLM…

  • Opus131

    Fair enough. The way you describe Test i certainly cannot say i condone anything he has done or said.

    In my defense, you need to understand just how often those type of insults are used to dismiss or taint #gamergate with things that do not really reflect on its goals or intents. The whole thing begun essentially when a big chunk of the gaming press as well as a large portion of social media venues engaged in a systematic suppression and censorship effort aimed at erasing all discussion regarding the Zoe Quinn scandal, which in itself wasn’t really that interesting and would have probably blown over on its own anyway (but if you want to make people interested in something, there’s nothing better than to try to shut down all discussions on the subject).

    Now combine this with the relentless lying and spin those people have hurled at what is essentially a very broad and diverse population which has no real political or ideological agenda (the participation of conservative personalities being of no import to the actual political beliefs of gamers, most of whom are actually left-wing), going so far as rely on mainstream media outlets such as MSNBC (which at this point we might as well call the Fox News of the left, considering their lack of journalistic standards) to spin their one sided narrative, you may see exactly why some of us have become somewhat paranoid (alright, possibly very paranoid).

    Best i can do to make you understand just what it is that is happening, think of what Test has done here, and simply picture SJWs in the gaming press being the leftist counterpart to MRA trolls like him, with the caveat that unlike people like Test, those SJWs have real connections and real media clout. Would you think it ok if MRA trolls were to subject an entire group of people (say, film buffs) to some of their most spurious beliefs (i’m not saying everything MRA believe is wrong, much like not everything SJWs believe is wrong), and when people who simply want to enjoy films become understandably irritated, accuse them of being evil feminists and the like?

    Because this is EXACTLY what the gaming media is doing. Hell, even Richard Dawkins has ran afoul with those people. Would you say now that Richard Dawkins is an MRA troll who hates women and wants to see feminism destroyed?

    Nobody likes ideologues, of any stripes, telling them that what they enjoy is bad and that their favored entertainment form or hobby should change to reflect some kind of ideology or another. The gaming industry already has enough problems of its own with big publishers telling studios what to develop and stifling creativity in general and we certainly don’t want to deal with this ideological crap too. Is that really so much to ask?

    Ho, and for storming the castle, i find it funny that you would use that analogy in an argument about gamers. 😛

  • Opus131

    “2nd, a leftist rag would be a fucking newspaper with a liberal bias. Learn what your political slurs mean before you use them in anger. You’d sound less ignorant that way.”

    Heh, ok. I’m just a dumb Italian and i still have to learn all yer American customs or expressions, so sometimes i just bluff and hope i got it right afterwards.

  • Opus131

    The definition of no true Scotsman fallacy:

    “No true Scotsman is an informal fallacy, an ad hoc attempt to retain an unreasoned assertion”

    Now, there is nothing unreasoned in saying that #gamergate is not about raping women, which has to be proven on its own terms.

    Some Scotsmen rape women while screaming that they are Scotsmen. Are all Scotsmen rapists now? According to what you are saying, arguing that not all Scotsmen are in fact rapists and that being a Scotsman has nothing to do with being a rapist is a no true Scotsman fallacy, which means because a few individuals raped women while identifying themselves as Scotsman, being a Scotsman now equals being a rapist.

    Another analogy. Sam Biddle recently tweeted that we should all bring back bullying. Unseasoned proposition: all gaming journalists are bullies. Reply: well, what Sam Biddle said doesn’t reflect what all gaming journalists believe. Opps, no true Scotsman fallacy. Therefore: all gaming journalists are bullies.

  • Lional punsalot

    “Now, there is nothing unreasoned in saying that #gamergate is not about raping women”

    Apart from the fact that some of your people have said thats exactly what it is. And you have said they do not represent the totality of your group while they say they do.

    Your understanding of the fallacy is flawed.

  • Opus131

    Sorry, i don’t think it is. Linking to this fallacy is often used to sustain unreasoned assertions in the first place, which is what you are doing here.

    Besides, nobody ever claimed that #gamergate is about raping women, and certainly nobody that has any actual prominence in the “movement” (quotation marks because #gamergate is not even an actual movement, but mostly a consumer revolt). The simple proof of this is that nobody sane could possibly claim that. You people are shooting yourselves in the foot when you are saying things like that because anyone with actual critical thinking will never believe such an absurdity. That suddenly a bunch of gamers banded together because they want to rape and murder women. I mean, really?

    BTW, out of curiosity, have you ever heard of Atheism+?

  • Lional punsalot

    This is going nowhere, im done, andrew hes all yours.

  • The messed up thing is that publishing companies sponsor the journalism industry, but this has been a known fact for many years.
    I mean, did you know that someone got fired for giving like a 7/10 for some Kane & Lynch game and that is a confirmed fact by now? The whole system is broken! Who cares if some individual chose to prostitute herself for her game?

  • Mark Bisone

    I’m just gonna keep posting these until all the madness ends:

  • sciencemile

    Battling feminism or the Left isn’t what #GamerGate is supposed to be about (majority of us are Left and Feminists), but that’s what gets put out there by opponents. And people like Test are joining because they think that’s the case. They’re latecomers, right-wingers who bought the opposition line and they’re getting a rude awakening when their fight-picking behavior gets called out by the rest of us.

    That’s my perspective anyways, and it informed my actions.

  • Mark Bisone

  • Mark Bisone

    ….

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I saw this post last, and thought you were turning into one of them.

  • Mark Bisone

    A spiderman?

  • El_Runko
  • Hank_Henshaw

    Paul Who Sucks Anderson might have a passion for Lovecraft, the first Alien movie and all you want, but he can’t make a good movie to save his life. I’m alright with him making those Resident Evil movies for the rest of eternity, I’ve never watched one of those, and I wont start now.

    AvP2, I know very little about. When I read that people were saying it was worse than the first, I didn’t even try to check if that could be true or not.

    There are only 2 Alien movies, and Predator is a one movie series. That’s all you really need.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Its common knowledge humans get cancelled from being negative.

    (that’s not how it appears in the edited version of the comment, but that’s how I misread it for the first time).

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    No, the madness. Because you were bombarding the comment section.

  • Mark Bisone

    ……

  • @Domo_Konnichiwa:disqus, tell me what’s going on. I’ve been too busy unpacking.

  • So now I have to subscribe to Pre-Rec in order to see Rich Evans’s thespianism?

  • Mark Bisone

    Looks like the joint is finally quieting down. But fuck it, here’s one more for the road:

  • WrongWithYourFace

    OH MY GAAAAAW– Rich Evans read the same comment I read!
    http://i.imgur.com/NdVWAYb.gif

  • Red 6

    Why don’t you end the show by cutting to black and showing credits like every other webshow, video review, skit, or anything in the world.

    The giant “END” to end things shows that you guys really don’t understand film.

  • Red 6

    Wait, so you’re telling me that Jack, renowned Mario Kart genius and ten-time Mario Kart World Champion doesn’t like an atmospheric survival horror simulation?

    Jesus, you guys need to stop reviewing games you don’t understand and/or are bad at.

  • Alex Lee

    Ironically, this poetry slam moment has more depth than poetry slams because it’s a satire of poetry slams. In one minute, the Rich Evans has shown the farcical nature of that form of entertainment. Non rhyming poetry has been shown as it really is: poorly constructed thoughts exposed to the world.

  • My ex wife

    Everyone gets everything he wants.
    We wanted a review, and for our sins,
    they gave us one.
    Brought it up to us like room service. It was a real
    choice review, and when it was over, we’d never wanted another.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    What, keeping all them Nukies for yourself now?

  • Hey, because I was trying to clean out the house before we moved, in the last month or so, I sent probably three or four packages to RLM. I don’t want to spoil any surprises, but one of those shipments was a large cache of VHS “movies” by a single director that are quite unlike anything that’s been on BOTW/WOTW–and certainly unlike anything I’d ever seen. Let’s just say I was embarrassed to take them up to the counter in the Good Will Hunting.

  • its called bleach

    you know, not everything has to be like everything else

  • El_Runko

    I agree, they totally don’t know lessons of life.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    They lack instince.

  • Lional punsalot

    like me? or the gamergate people? or the angry alien fanboys? or the angry alien haters?

    Which group of them do you mean?

  • Mark Bisone

    Don’t don’t comments you don’t understand.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Credits are unnecessary. If someone doesn’t know Rich Evans is Rich Evans, fuck them. It’s their loss.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Well, Gamergate has officially entered RLM, but it’s morphed into an unrecognizable blob, and now it won’t go away. ‘Tommy Wiseau’ commented on their Pre-Rec show, but in the youtube comments section. New people on the wall of shame who got there really quick.

    Internet Fights. Crocodiles fucking lions. No one knows how to pronounce twat.

    Fire and brimstone coming down from the sky. Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes. The dead rising from the grave. Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria…

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Humans get cancel from being negative.

  • Mark Bisone

    But I just got tested and they said I was cancel negative! Those fat skinny twoots!

  • The Ghost

    If you don’t like Pre Rec, just uninstall it, you boring twat.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    To say I love Rich would be an understatement

  • Flaw Filial

    No, you need to donate to their Patreon account.
    Your Nukie donations ain’t cuttin’ it, anymore.

  • Wizard Phoenix
  • Wizard Phoenix

    I can’t tell if you want to get banned or if this is satire.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    He doesn’t know lessons of life.

  • Damn, and I missed it all. Thanks for the summary–well done. I hereby nominate you for the position of official Recording Secretary of the RLM Wall of Shame.

  • Red 6

    I enjoy Rich Evans, but I hate to see him make these incredibly bad reviews. It’s for the good of RLM.

  • I’m reading Cary Elwes’s As You Wish on the making of The Princess Bride and, as I see it, the secret to the movie’s success was that it did its own thing its own way–plus a really good cast and screenwriter.

  • Here’s a link–for anyone who wants to see Trigglety in his natural habitat:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOrphBFlDsg&google_comment_id=z12xhfbxdxf0cfldx22rivkgtnfggzc4b04

  • I’ve been there from that first weekend when a lot of us took the plunge:

    http://www.patreon.com/user?u=153317

  • Lional punsalot

    I cant wait till a new video is uploaded so I never have to read these comments again.

  • Like Icare

    If we lose the time before us the future will ignore us. We should use it, we could use it, yeah.

    Lessons of life.

  • NotRickBerman
  • Like Icare

    …and knowing is half the bag.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    *Twaits.

  • Just to be clear: My brother’s mentor was the author of Between Heaven and Hell. My mentor coined (at least popularized) the term WASP.

  • Dammit Google

    I read this comment the other day! Lazy trolling, there.

  • Jason Ross

    Is that really Sigurney Waeverly’s daughter in the box art? If so, I’d hit that.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    are you made of irony or just stupid?

  • Like Icare

    It’s their crocodile brains. They need to get lion brains.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i gave up its not like he’ even reading them. that would get in the way of his essay writing.

  • Mark Bisone

    Lion brain is overratted. What they need is fish scale.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    This shit’s more quotable than Seinfeld.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    can you read or are you so blinded with troll rage that you cant see further than your own opinion.
    every industry in the world is corrupt, thinking games are special and you can fix it all with a hashtag, is shall we say a flawed premise. and a small number of your group are sad 12 wanna be rapists. its not your fault but the make you look like a bunch of sickos. live with it.,
    you can now write another essay of your “Life is unfair!!!” series

  • Like Icare

    Do you know lessons of life?
    L-O-L, I do.

  • Like Icare

    It’s because it’s so dense. There’s so much going on.

  • Palpatine
  • Like Icare

    T. Waits

  • fred

    You shouldn’t hit women.

  • Flaw Filial

    Bullshit.
    I don’t like things that are different.

  • The Ghost

    My gut. It hurts.

  • Ogrot

    No they need to remove skeleton!

  • Matt Bryson

    You shouldn’t hit anyone…

  • Wizard Phoenix

    That guy’s channel is getting bombarded with requotes of his comment.

  • Jennifer Elise Bunnell

    Dear god, do you realize how many times I clicked on that to try to respond to TriGGletyplay, before I realized it was a jpeg you had embedded??
    You monster…

  • Lional punsalot

    “”written”. No, typed not written. Im using using a pen or pencil to type this.”

    “Like I typed to someone, somewhere, someonline in this internet place, I don’t use my keyboard muchly. Only for gaming. I cant see W,A,S & D no more. Fading away. Just faded away. ”

    my god i love this person.

  • fred

    Except for Nazis.

  • Lional punsalot

    space nazis or elves made in nazi rape experiments?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    “I feel a bit overwhelmed here. Invaded. All those off topic comments have to go.

    Nowt in logic in relation to the actual video. Sunday some comments are dust bin.” This guy is amazing. Rich has to read all of his comments.

  • Lional punsalot

    Every comment he makes is just so strange, its like an alien came to earth and found a computer connected to youtube and tried to communicate with the earthlings.

    Its not like hes even trying to be strange, it like something gets in between him thinking and his fingers typing the words and it just becomes this magnificent poetry.

    “You internet kids really baffle me. Thank god im from printed “on paper” spoken word, pencil/pen, face to face generation. I dont use this keyboard much. Only for gaming.”

    He isn’t even a twelve year old, my one real theory about this guy has been wiped out.

  • Matt Bryson

    Don’t be racist. Nazi Space Elves are a vibrant part of our society and don’t need people casually promoting assaulting them

  • dollar store cashier wife

    He won’t get famous but he will get cancel.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    nagh.. i was just drunk.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its epic poetry of loss and alienation…. hey who remembers Alien Nation?…

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    they call it outsider art.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahah!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i just got back from room 101 and the gamers are right. RLM should never mention games again….
    that way we dont have to put up with whining 12 year old virgin gamers…
    just the regular group of 12 year old virgin filmers.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    lucusfarts. you missed the key to the puzzle!!!!! he said ‘Nowt.” he is a northerner! maybe even scottish or worse!!!!!? WELSH!!!!!

  • Like Icare

    it like something gets in between him thinking and his fingers typing the words and it just becomes this magnificent poetry.

    Well… he clearly has two brains – a crocodile brain and a lion brain. So his thoughts get reinterpreted between the two, and the product is… poetry?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    this is kind of my point. and the fact that you gamers think your the only ones that have this corruption or that your sad clicktavist campaign will achieve anything, is endlessly depressing.
    you lost before you started, because you all seem surprised by it. welcome to the world kids, we are all whores the only honor is your price……….

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i would pay to watch rich read comments for 20 hours before buying this game.

  • Jennifer Elise Bunnell

    Welsh beats Scots in the worst of the Britains contest?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    yeah i’m from the Shetlands…. the u.k ranking is Shetlands, then the highlands, then the lowlands, then the welsh, then northern Ireland, then finally england. hell the republic of Eire out ranks the poms!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i am so sick of this game shite! I’m going to binge watching all the plinket reviews till they give me another post to vomit bile on……. Help me RLM-Kenobi. your my only hope!

  • NotRickBerman
  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    more epic gamer…

    “Shit game, pirated it, hated it.
    Bad game.”

    suck on that Haiku!

  • Guest

    is this about “cunts” can we not say cunt? half of all humans have a cunt… and the rest of us are behaving like cunts!
    people cum in cunts then more people come out of cunts,

    i love cunts!

  • Joe Syxpac

    I loved that show.

    And the movie too.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    is this about “cunts” can we not say cunt? half of all humans have a cunt… and the rest of us are behaving like cunts!
    people cum in cunts then more people come out of cunts,

    i love cunts!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    yeah is drunk agsin youse cunsss

  • Joe Syxpac

    Really? Point to one.

  • Jason Ross

    Elves or any creatures from Nazitron are exempted from this maxim

  • Peanut Turner

    I respect the amount of effort that went into this game, especially all the source media they had access to and the lengths they went to try and recreate that low-fi sci fi look that harkens back to Ridley Scott’s 70s masterpiece. I’d just love to see all that VHS-esque aesthetic used in a more interesting game without the emphasis on horror.

    I went to a talk by the developers and somebody asked ‘did you have to be careful when making the game that it wasn’t TOO scary for people’ and the lead dev replied something like ‘we don’t care if it’s too scary for you; we made the game we wanted to make, screw everyone else’ or at least sentiments to that effect… Which, to me, is absolutely not the way to be a good ‘lead’ on a game. If you’re an auteur of games like Hideo Kojima or Keita Takahashi, you can afford to think like that. If your relatively small game dev company is working for a much larger games corporation like Sega, you can’t afford to make the mistake of thinking you can do what you like.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i went to a talk on syphilis… that doesn’t mean i want to spread it around…..

  • Peanut Turner

    That’s a very responsible attitude. Good job.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    nicely played peanut… nicely played….

  • Jason Ross

    I got drunk tonite and stumbled around and I made it home in my car but my hand hurts my right hand pinky is stiff and black and blue. I think I fell on it. Probably the wrong forum but I think it might be critical in the morning when I sober up. I know it’s onoly like 11 p.m. in Michigan land or wherever u hacks live but I’me dying over here. Or I will be soon.

    I might be dead when the sun

    and a talk on syphilis is needed

  • Like Icare

    Fire safety. It ain’t just cool. It’s the law.

  • Lional punsalot

    I dont know what that was but i would watch an entire series of that.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its like 6am in Milwaukee you drunk syphilitic bastard!

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Welcome back!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i still think RLM needs a TV show…. http://youtu.be/nC1oQ3jdzCU

  • Now I Get It

    A valid question. I always thought it was the Irish that made the Scots look like geniuses.

  • Sully

    Are you sure it’s an STD? You could be possessed by an ancient demon (Psh. As if there are brand new demons). The only way to be sure is to tie an anvil around your feet and toss yourself into a river. If you float, you’re not possessed, but if you sink and drown, then it was the devil all along and you’ve done the whole world a HUGE fucking favor.
    Let’s us know how it turns out.

    Numeric Symbol: SilenceInAndOfItselfCanBeAnAnswer

  • Benzo

    What’s interesting is that Yahtzee gave this game a comparatively shining review, and you guys hate it. Damn it, I love you all, who do I believe?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    do not scroll down!!!!!! make up your own mind!

  • Sully

  • Now I Get It

    Younger Mentor = Younger Brother.

    Thus, the questions become: “Which of you named your kayak The Maine? Which of you sabotaged it for the other to go down in?”

    Oh, and who got Greta? Who got Srta. Raventos?

  • Johan Wernquist

    Im from Sweden. Dont you fucking mock IKEA! Kamprad is coming for you.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you cant stop us fuck mocking IKEA!

  • Sully

    Yeah, but… it’s Sweden.

  • Sully

    Hit it and quit it…

  • Lional punsalot

    Making a game that you want to make can be a good thing, depending on the contempt the developer shows for the consumer in stating that.

    It should have been 3-4 hours long and cost 20 quid, then I wouldn’t have minded it.

    In this game they failed to invest me in the characters, they failed to deliver an original and interesting story, they failed to deliver enjoyable gameplay.

    If you enjoyed the gameplay, then I can understand why you forgive the terrible story but I cannot.

    I think this is the divide that exists, those that enjoyed the gameplay and those that didn’t. The people that hated the gameplay began to look to the story and were disappointed by it then began analyzing every flaw to figure out why they hated the game.

    I didn’t go into alien wanting to hate it, I wanted to love it as much as I love the movies.

  • Jason Ross

    I didn’t floated but I live please help plz

  • Sully

    Then you may be a cat. That would explain having more than one life and the use of “plz” in a comment.

    As with all news, however, there is an inherent good side as well as a bad. Which do you want first?

  • Civilisation V: The electric bogaloo.

    Any good?

  • Crikey Mate Down Under Aussie

    You could really care less? What does that even mean?

  • backsettio

    “I cant see W,A,S & D no more. Fading away. Just faded away.”

    Deep shit. Very noirish.
    Also, he probably should buy a new keyboard.

  • atheistconservative

    Anybody else think it funny that upon seeing a strange man crouching in a corner Jack’s gut response was to sneak up and mount him from behind?

  • atheistconservative

    Yahtzee’s reviews are about Yahtzee, not the games. He barely touched on gameplay in that ‘review’, just setups for his lame shit and cum jokes.

  • atheistconservative

    Ooh, what about women Nazis?

  • NotRickBerman

    Because, Sweden.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Tommy Wiseau perhaps?

  • Wizard Phoenix

    I have IKEA stuff and I mock IKEA, you dumb fat sknny fucks.

  • Lional punsalot

    Dont dont put together furniture you dont have instructions for.

  • Lional punsalot

    Its one of the most different countries we have ever tried to have involved, its gonna be great.

  • Lional punsalot

    Whilst I endorse consumer opinions, I must state for the record that IKEA furniture is quality furniture at low low prices and their customer service cant be beat.

    *whispers* where is my paycheck?

  • Lional punsalot

    Anyone else think it funny that a self confessed conservative is the one obsessed with peoples sex lives?

  • omitted

    Yeah, I like the scifi theme and the variation, but late game gets a bit bogged down and the AI is still dumb as shit. If you liked Civ5, you’ll probably enjoy BE too… IN SPAAACEEEE!!

  • TheZaius

    Well, Yahtzee is a huge fan of Silent Hill 2 and is typically an elitist prick who gives games poor reviews, yet he liked it. Meanwhile… these two don’t even like survival horror games. So there you go.

  • Sully

    Yeah, but he’s an “Atheist Conservative.”
    So there’s that… apparently.

  • Sully

    I finally sat through a few (by “few” I mean all 19) play throughs of the game to get an idea of what Rich and Jack were talking about, and for the most part, they’re right. It’s very tedious and repetitive. Graphically, the game is beautiful. I didn’t see any of the floating alien issues Rich and Jack were talking about. Maybe it depends on what you use to play the game (ps3/next gen console/PC). I think with just a few changes in gameplay variety this game could’ve been pushed to the next level.

    The only glitches I noticed while watching all 19 episodes were with the save option. On a couple of occassions, the player’s weapons (in this case the player being H20 Delirious) remained at the save point, suspended in air for some reason. The weapons still appeared in the item list and were still useable, but a copy was left behind. Other than that, the game ran smooth as silk.

    [Here’s some footage of the PC version. At the 1:50 mark you get a real good close up of the xenomorph. At 8:25 you see one of the save glitches.]

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUSeUdwzmWI&list=UUClNRixXlagwAd–5MwJKCw

  • Wizard Phoenix

    It’s pure intence

  • atheistconservative

    Anyone else find these two pathetic for mistaking a simple, humorous turn of a phrase in a situationally-appropriate manner – similar to a “that’s what she said” joke – for hatefeul hatey-hate hate? You so edgy.

  • Akka Fakka

    Obsessed? It’s a joke. Get a sense of humor, loser.

  • atheistconservative

    Sully, I would thank you to keep your disgusting Swedophobia out of this comments section!

  • Sully

    I think you missed the point.

  • its called bleach

    *tips fedora*

  • NicholasRibcage

    Hey, I was too busy at a photoshoot to comment. So it seems with Alien: Isolated Penises that they just re-made the first movie in game form. I mean the character is Ripley’s daughter, there’s a killer android, she blows up the ship, bleh, bleh bleh.

    Y’know what was a good game based off an existing property? Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic. That game took everything that made the original trilogy great, and did it’s own thing with it. It had an original story and unique characters which felt very Star Wars-ey, but weren’t direct rip-offs or copies from the movies.

    Anyway, it’s been seven days, when is that Plinkett review coming out?

  • Mark Bisone

    The shit is starting to get fucked again, so you asked for this:

  • NicholasRibcage

    Your people can’t hurt anyone, dude. Swedes are completely neutral. Some might say Dick Neutral.

  • NicholasRibcage

    Do you know lessons of life?

  • NicholasRibcage

    Yahtzee was using crocodile brain.

  • NicholasRibcage

    I’m getting cold shakes.

  • NicholasRibcage

    You’re just mad because it scared you.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Knights of The Old Republic is the best Star Wars prequel

  • mmp

    IGN and Gamespot gave the game a negative review, at least stating that it was “mediocre”. Aren’t they elitist pricks as well? That’s what I keep reading in numerous places.

  • The guy

    when’s the next plinkett review you hack frauds

  • Sully

    No mistake. Just stating the obvious.
    Also… did you really upvote your own post?

  • The Ghost

    Teehee 🙂

  • Ogrot

    There were others? My memories kind of fuzzy because I drank bleach regularly from 1999 to 2005. I can’t remember why I did that.

  • Lional punsalot

    I think there are books, that must be what he is talking about.

  • My ex wife

    He’s a Yorkshireman, that explains everything.
    Scots don’t say nowt, and the welsh aren’t northern.

  • My ex wife

    I thought you were an Aussie?
    I also find your ranking to be inaccurate.
    It goes… South England (constituting anywhere south of Birmingham except London), North England, Scots, Welsh, London, Northern Ireland.
    Ireland loses all points on account of Pikeys.

  • My ex wife

    Maybe our generation should take the madness into our warm strong arms. Feel warm and happy. Just dont expect me to full load ya batty when the time comes to exit all remaining consequences.

    I think this is actually starting to hurt my brain…

    my lion brain. ahhhhggggg!!!1112345six

  • Just like Civ5. Ai problems and Ai problems. I can’t complain too much though, don’t know how many games I’ve played.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Plus also don’t forget the hotness that was Bastila Shan.

  • TheZaius

    IGN? Elitist? No. Gamestop? Eh, you sure you don’t mean Gamespot? I generally wouldn’t trust any reviews from Gamestop. And in my experience, Gamespot has spotty reviews.
    Not to say that Yahtzee is always right but I’ll listen to his opinion regarding survival horror games over these two.

  • mmp

    Corrected it. Thanks.

    So tell me why IGN is not elitist or biased only for the porpuse of getting money?

    I was just wondering. I don’t mind IGN at all and I’ve got useful information from their reviews. The same can be said about Gamespot.

  • Wizard Phoenix

    Look crocodile brain!

  • Derek Cottle

    Apparently, making a decent Alien game is a nearly impossible task. There’s even a good Judge Dredd game, for the SNES. But Alien? Forget it…

  • fred

    …shit.

  • Thanatos2k

    Alien vs Predator. PC, late 90s.

  • Thanatos2k

    KOTOR 2 is good.

    TOR is……………….ok if played purely as a single player game.

  • Thanatos2k

    Let’s hope Jedi Knight 2 won’t end up being the best Star Wars sequel.

  • Thanatos2k

    Yahtzee loves horror games that care more about the atmosphere than the mechanics. No big surprise.

  • Now, now, boys, play nice. And, as a wise man once said, keep your politics in your pocket.

  • NIGI, I’m married to a colleen.

    I can’t get away with laughing at stuff like that.

  • Hey, isn’t that Uncle Milty?

  • White knight much?

  • Opus131

    Yes, AvP 1999, one of the most intense PC games ever made. Good Old Games is in the process of releasing it with a reworked online system of their own making. I would recommend giving it a try once its out.

  • Now I Get It

    No, there are more leisurely ways, for sure, to prove your manhood than pressing the local matriarchy in a confidence referendum.

    As my non-genius-but-no-fool Scot boss told me just this weekend, when I de-reported for work with a bad back, “Well, nothing urgent here. Treat yourself to a hot bath along with all the right drugs.”

  • Bahareh Khosravi

    Hey guys we made Colonial Marines and it sucked shit,let’s make us another garbage pile! I got a fever and the only prescription is MORE RIPLEY!

  • the local matriarchy’s “confidence referendum” = Percy v. the iron frying pan

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i prefer gyippos.

  • NotRickBerman

    That’s gonna be great.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i’m miss the Mechwarrior franchise.

  • Alex Lee

    KOTOR 2 could be better. It tries to the TSB of KOTOR, but the tone, but that anti-climatic ending is just terrible.

  • Alex Lee

    Listen Lion brain!

  • Lional punsalot

    “she asked me if I knew lessons of life, I told her I looked lion brain”
    “She asked me if there was any other way she could pay, I told her we got the worse president in the history of the united states”
    “She asked me if I wanted a blowjob, I told her I had my hair cut that morning”
    “She lay on the bed and asked If I could warm her up, so I gave her a dressing gown and turned up the radiator”
    – dick neutral

  • Thanatos2k

    You gotta install the mod that restores all the content.

  • Alex Lee

    I bought it for the original Xbox.

  • Michael Collins

    What’s the best horror game out there to date?

    Also, wondering what steam games will be on sale later this week with Halloween coming up..

  • Flaw Filial

    Is that politics in your pocket, or are you just happy to flame me?

  • atheistconservative

    And now you show your obvious prejudice towards rounded individuals. For shame, sir.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    Silent Hill 2.

  • Lets all talk about how terrible dumb and dumberererereer is going to be….

  • Now I Get It

    I know that Godard insisted that all you need for a movie is a frying pan and a girl, but really. Cherchez la femme? Oui.

    http://www.francetoday.com/articles/images/2010/08/1198-2249.main_f.jpg

    Et cherchez l’homme.

  • Charon

    It was meant to be a little tongue-in-cheek. But, no smoke without fire.

  • Charon

    KEEP YOUR STUPID POLITICS IN YOUR POCKET!

    *continues smoking joint*

  • Matt Bryson

    Hey if I don’t stand up for the rights of Nazi Space Elves, who will?

  • Square Peg

    I think if you see smoke everywhere, you should check your eyes to make sure you don’t have any stupid in them.

  • Charon

    Again, tongue-in-cheek. It was a rhetorical statement. I watched an internet video and looked into the type of influence that game companies are having on even small-time internet Youtubers. So, yeah. Not dumb. It’s a thing.

  • Mark Bisone

    So they need to uninstall it?

  • fred

    hell yeah bitch

  • fred

    what the ffUCK??

  • Sully

    I’m going to say Silent Hill 2, though the original gets points for kickstarting the whole franchise. Who doesn’t remember the first time they heard that siren just before shit got real?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    I liked Clive Barker’s Undying (circa 2000?). It had its moments. It had a terrible chapter set in a fantasy world with silly looking cavemen and carnivorous plants, but all the other stuff set at the manor, the monastery and Oneiros was pretty effective. That thing where you could use your psychic vision to see creepy shit going on around you was pretty awesome. I remember liking every boss fight, except the last one which was just a giant head monster. Lame.

  • Lional punsalot

    Im looking forward to it, did I mention that I had a piece of my brain removed today? all that is left now is crocodile.

  • Thanatos2k

    Well that was your first mistake…..

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    Can we talk about how John Wick is one of the best comedy films of the year?

  • Ogrot

    Don’t don’t things you don’t like!

  • Mark Bisone

    I haven’t seen it, but the fact that Keno Reed’s first line in the trailer is “That dog was a gift from my dying wife” bodes very well.

  • Ogrot

    Darth Traya dosnt have eyesight you dumb fat, skinny fucks. Its pure forsness. Look yoga brain, Like Windu brain.

    Dont play the game. Uninstall it you boring twats. Dont dont about things you dont like. Do you know ways of the forse? Talk about things you do like. Nerfherders.

  • Ogrot

    I hear the movie’s so bad they aren’t even screening it for audiences.

  • Ogrot

    Personally I’m worried about the new movie fucking with the pre-established canon of Dumb and Dumberer. Can’t these hacks keep their dirty fingers off of our continuities? Hey you get your fingers out of my ass canon!

  • Ogrot

    Who wants to bet “Get your fingers out of my ass cannon!” is an actual line in Dumb and Dumberererererererrerer 2?

  • Lional punsalot

    thats gonna be great.

  • Ogrot

    It’s gonna be great.

  • Bahareh Khosravi

    Siren Blood curse! The remake’s pretty decent.

  • Duckler

    ErmaGorn, this dumb game’s review gets way too many comments! Also: Oh, I’m wearing panties.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    WHERE’S THE HALLOWEEN-THEMED BOTW?

    Oh. And…

    YOU HACK FRAUDS!

    I’m sorry, but patience is like a spider: I smoosh it instead of letting it crawl on me.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    It’ll be the dummiest.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Not as funny as FURY, though.

    You know you’ve arrived in Over-the-top-ville when the single moment of humanity and mercy in your WWII flick belongs to a Nazi!??!!

  • RLMkeepitup

    Resident Evil 1-2 was good too but not as psychologically scary or interesting as sh 2.

  • RLMkeepitup

    Hi guys, plenty of time to make more Halloween related content (wink wink). So many bad 80s horror movies out there. Plus I still haven’t seen maggot man on that wheel! And ya’lls videos are better than candy corn so keep ’em rollin’.

  • Michael Collins

    Had a look at Silent Hill 2 on youtube yesterday, looks like it could be worth a shot.
    Recently played FEAR, and am now playing it’s add on Extraction Point, which is better, more atmospheric and some genuinely spooky moments. Enemies are a bit repetitive but it’d a solid shooter with horror elements.

    Played Undying long ago also, didn’t do it for me, maybe it’s just that Gothic style, but I don’t find ghosts to be particularly scary.

    Half Life 2 has some good horror sections, the obvious being Ravenholme, but those black headcrabs were the scariest little fuckers in a game I’ve played yet, always freak me out.

    Doom 3 – not scary
    Alan Wake – combat let it down, had it’s moments tho
    Quake – fucking great

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Alan Wake would’ve made for a nice tv miniseries. Like you say, the combat was a letdown, and when you take that out, all you are left with is the Twin Peaks/X-Files-like storytelling.

  • DanceK

    Why does an Alien game want me to insert one slut into another slut?

  • Jennifer Elise Bunnell

    Thank you, thank you. It’s nice to be remembered. 🙂

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    I’ve already got too much in my pocket.

    Seriously.
    47 cents. In nickles and pennies.
    Some chewed gum.
    A hair — maybe it’s lint — can’t tell, it’s kinda stuck to the gum.
    My grocery list, now wad-shaped.
    My keys.
    A hole.
    A shiny wrapper, maybe for the gum, pre-chewing.
    And a rocket.

    Yes, I got a rocket in my pocket.

    What of it?

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Kamprad?

    Is that, like, Krampus’ bitchy girlfriend?

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Pay attention, rhinoceros brain!

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    This is great.

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Fuck mocking?

    Damn, I already feel insecure about my “sexual healing” techniques. I don’t need all you guys fuck mocking me!

  • Pa Kent Says Maybe

    Isn’t Yahtzee that game my grandma used to play with dice and a cup?

    What the hell does Yahtzee know?

    I hated that fyucking game!

  • Michael Collins

    I just had a look at that, seems like it might be good, but it’s a console game, and I don’t have one of those, PC all the way.

    Thanks for the reply tho…

  • TheZaius

    I no, rite!

  • Palpatine

    Here’s Rich Evans explaining how “funny” it’ll be:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWVaDxMTBEU

  • Michael Collins

    tru dat!

  • fred

    They’re all so young…and not fat.

  • Bahareh Khosravi

    my pleasure.I prefer PC too. You might enjoy Outlast, I thought it was rad. You can’t go wrong with Silent Hill 1-2-3 and even shattered memories. Also Call of Cthulu has good atmosphere. But there are save issues on the PC version. If you’re more of an action horror fan rather than survival horror, you’ll probably like Dead Space. Have you played Fatal Frame?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you took out your lion? did it have cancel?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i have to say i’m not a horror game fan. if i want to play an Alien game i want it to be a Alien’s game.
    and the m41a is the best gun ever… but i am biased.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    are you sure your not reading “American Psycho.”… no wait that was rats in slut’s…
    to soon?

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    the best part of any BotW is the “Rich Evans explains a movie trope.” bit.
    it is usually followed by a “Rich Evans explains how this movie TOTALLY FUCKED IT!”

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i’m using that from now on.
    like people who stand to close to you in queue. turn around and shout “Get your fingers out of my ass cannon!”

    i bet they back off.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    sorry to go back to the evil past… but i loved this gamer comment as much a “lion brain”
    “What did I tell you about the shortness clown?”

  • UnShame

    Oh, you two fucks hrauds, talking about stuff you know nothing about again, why won’t you just go and do something productive… wait, this game is based on a movie, and movies is kind of your thing, maybe it’s not that bad.
    But you’re probably gonna say shit I’ve heard from much more competent people already.
    No? Oh, then you’re gonna be assholes and nitpick something that everybody likes just to create a debate… Hmm, those are actually some good, even great, points that I haven’t heard anybody talk about.
    You actually sound… right…
    Fuck… Now I’m gonna have to play this game just to prove that you are incompetent when it comes to reviewing games.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    like rich said.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Nothing like a reference from The Room to settle people down. 😉

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfUj4QJGnok

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Pennies?

    I’m glad my government phased those out.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash
  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Glad you haven’t changed that cute thumbnail, either.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Seems I missed a lot of drama and also some hilarious new RLM memes in my quasi-absence. Pure For instince, I missed some lessons of life and I dont dont want to miss any more! I’ll have to catch up soon! That said, that 48 hour film I mentioned to a few on here, the one I helped make Oct 17th-19th, has now been uploaded onto YouTube. It’s currently unlisted and will be up for only about a week I wager, so, yeah … prepare yourselves for some odd Nazi themed film [our ‘inspiration’ package included the photo you’ll see posted everywhere]:

    http://youtu.be/_tWzLpxZvLg

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    cancer=cancel
    lion brain look crocodile brain= we are not sure poetry maybe, or evolution?
    people who didnt like the game should uninstall it and shut up.
    my fave was. “What did i tell you about the shortness clown.”
    i made a picture.

  • Ogrot

    I think he was doing like a thing.

  • Lional punsalot

    Without her paycheck for the 5 minutes of audio, this game would have cost $15.

    True story.

  • Lional punsalot

    So, what exactly was the black goo?

  • A learned man. A hero. A God!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    frogs?

  • Stardog Champion

    The video game industry has butchered my beloved Alien film for the past 10 plus years. Can these damn frauds just leave Alien alone please! Alien Isolation looks like a fps who tries to be horror survival but looks boring. Every time these game developers make a new broken uninspired Alien game, it just cheapens the franchise and turn it into a joke. What’s next they going to make a Clockwork Orange game?

  • DarkFluffy

    Silent Hill 2 is not that scary I think. It has more a mystic feeling for me. The otherworld is also very harmless compared to SH1 and 3. Silent Hill 1 or Dead Space 1 would be my choice for the most scary games. (Played every big horror title of the last 20 years)

  • DarkFluffy

    Is this really an Alien Isolation Critic or a critic for videogames? Did you honstly compared the movie mechnics of the xenomorph with the videogame? How should that work? Crewmembers will die and after 3h you finally see the alien for…5min. Yeah..that would be a perfect game. -_-

  • Sully

    Take two of these and call me in the morning…

  • mmp

    Help me out. Where the “cancel” thing came from? I can’t find it.

  • DarkFluffy

    The review is heavy influenced of their own opinion of how a game in general should look like. I don’t think it was their goal to make ALIEN Isolation look bad (at least I hope so…) but this kind of games is not their taste obvously. It’s a bit like Angry Joes review about Risen 3 were he absolutly hated the game because he only used buttonsmashing . “Outlast” for example would probably also a failure in their opinion I guess. Open a door when the Alien walks towards your back to kill you any second…how is that “boring”?
    Another generation, another taste.

  • DarkFluffy

    Isolation still the best. This review is “not good” to say it friendly. Youtube has plenty of gamers playing Isolation. If you are a fan of the original movie you will feel at home right at the start.

  • DarkFluffy

    Yeah it was weird. 20h of gameplay and their showed us these 2 minutes of it. Very representative review…. >>

  • DarkFluffy

    Be more worried about your blue eyed, blonde women up there 😉

    I heard bad stories about IKEA. Don’t defend some of your most corrupt companies that is squeazing out poor people in Belarus. Quality went also downhill over the decades…

  • DarkFluffy

    Me too…I think the most people here bitching about Alien Isolation will never ever touch a game. Trolls, spammer, a “fox”….also the review is heavly influenced on the personal opinion, the dislike of stealth horrorgames. Yeah, they can stop wasting their time in doing this reviews, they are obviosly too old for games.

  • DarkFluffy

    I agree to a certain point with you…I also think that “money” could have played a role in this review….

  • DarkFluffy

    Excactly! Blizzard/Activision payed trolls to hunt down people with opinions against the Diablo 3 auction house for example. It was as bad as these Pro Putin trolls…

  • DarkFluffy

    there are PAYED trolls on the internet!

  • DarkFluffy

    hope RLM will never review Civ in the manner they did Alien “And the worst thing…it was not real time strategy…Rick: WHAAAAT?? Worst game ever…>>”

  • possumGFX

    He was half the man he is today.

  • DarkFluffy

    I’m with you. This “review” is more about how much they hate or don’t understand the stealth horror genre. Amnesia or Outlast would also be as bad as Alien Isolation in their eyes. This game is still 100 Times better than Colonial Marines but instead of showing us all the great moments and the panic you feel when opening a door with the Alien right behind you, they choose to show us the few ai bugs. I like the guys. They are awesome, but this review is just not good. No idea what they were thinking or hoping for. Maybe they missed the colonial marines or a predator..or Ridley from Metroid. This review is the worst thing I saw in a long time.

  • DarkFluffy

    Good point. It happend not only once in the past that some companies went mad. Take a look at the Blizzard/activison trolls that fought for the auctions house in Diablo 3…hunting down peoples with other opinions 24h. Nintendo has the image of beeing the gamers best friend….but that means nothing when it comes to buisness.

  • DarkFluffy

    I was also sceptical…but even the biggest fanboy should have a life or at least play the games of his company from time to time…but when Blizzard/Activision people hunt down people with other opinions (Auction House in Diablo 3 for example) 24h 7d all year…than the probability that money is involved is very high in my opinion. Thats ONE of the ways game companies deal with their competitors nowadays. The other could be to influence reviewer. IGN for example is famous for their hilarious game ratings that are alway far better (like: 9/10) then the average ratings for the same game (5/10).

  • DarkFluffy

    You are a jerk, but here I can fully agree with you. About the movies and the crossover BS. But are the AVP movies/games even kanon? I don’t think so. It’s fanfic as far as I understood Ridley Scott. No Predators in Ellen Ripleys universe 🙂

  • The Ghost

    Again: I really don’t think this independent web site, which takes in no money from big-name advertisers or game publishers and is not beholden to any such sponsors – and provides their commentary voluntarily – enjoys NIntendo games because they’re on the take from the company.

  • James Robert Thompson

    It pretty much would. Any time you see the Xenomorph you should be dead within 1 minute until you get the flamethrower, and that should be near enough to the end of the game that you only use it three times tops. In that case you’d actually bother to keep away from the gribbly monster rather than find him a mild annoyance while you go about your puzzles.

  • atheistconservative

    “The review is heavy influenced of their own opinion of how a game in general should look like.”

    Tell us more about this conspiracy you’ve uncovered.

  • atheistconservative

    John Wick is amazing. But that Ms. Perkins tack-on gender-balance character just about ruins the film.

  • Sully

    Good fan fiction should at least abide by the rules of the canon.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    its from the you tube comments.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i love you sully!

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    well russian trolls work cheap.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    you do know that your reply had nothing to do with stardogs comment.

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    i hate the game. i hate boring door puzzles. i hate bad stealth mechanics. and honestly i hate the fans of this game. they all seem to be cranky 12 year olds who seem incapable of understanding that other people can hate some thing they like.
    oh and its RLM!!! they made a 90 starwars review that is just mick bitching about george lucas. they do OPINIONS! thats what most of us watch for.

  • Domo_Konnichiwa

    I wished she used more weapons and cunning rather than brute force. It would’ve been more believable.

    But ya, I loved that I could see the fight sequences for once, all the blood, squibs, the special hotel ‘code’ and the humor that created. There were a lot of little things that annoyed me to the point where I hesitate to recommend it. Finding out the director is a first timer and worked with stunts made sense, because the story wasn’t as strong as the stunts/action work.

    I wished the Russian mob leader, when explaining why John Wick was so badass, would show little glimpses of JW just shooting up a place, or a pile of bodies building up, just something to give a “show-don’t-tell” type of moment.

    I’m glad I saw it in the theater. I don’t think Keanu Reeves is a great actor, but he’s great at deadpan humor, probably without realizing it.

  • DanceK

    I wouldn’t say “too soon”. More like “too big”. You know…

  • TechnoSyndrome

    I swear if you guys bash Zelda II…

  • Giga

    Haha, they played it on easy. That’s why they got to look at the alien so much. I’m playing it on hard right now, and the only times I get to look at it is when it’s murdering me. On hard it hears the slightest sound (including your friggin motion tracker) and you have to really keep your distance if you want to have a chance of survival.

    Also, 99% of the things they’re complaining about in this video can be said about the entire 1st person stealth genre, starting with the first thief. I understand why it may be boring to some people, but it’s kinda ridiculous to bash a lemon for being a lemon. Oh well, to each his own.

  • whip

    I must say, my first introduction or review of this game came from you guys, and since I value your opinion, I took what you had to say as gospel, and really believed the game was very sub par and uninspired.

    But since then I’ve seen that there is a lot of support for this game, both from consumers and critics. Even the curmudgeonly Yahtzee Croshaw is giving the game a fairly easy going, positive review.. generally speaking. As positive as he ever is anyhow. AngryJoe is practically having orgasms over it. Countless friends are telling me how great it is…

    Of course you are entitled to your opinions, and I’m not saying you are wrong, or they are right. But I’m seeing a trend here that makes me feel as though your own take on it is not as accurate or knowledgeable about the game.

    http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/9817-Alien-Isolation-Review

  • mmp

    They played on Normal.

  • Giga

    I highly doubt that, but even if that’s the case, the game itself tells you that HARD is the default mode and how it should be experienced. Many of their complaints about the visible AI and the blind/deaf alien simply do not happen on hard, and even when they do you dont see them because you’re too busy keeping your distance. Give it a try, you’ll see.

  • mmp

    I haven’t played it yet. It’s too expensive in my country.

  • Warlord X

    I haven’t played the game yet, and I still plan to, but since I value the opinion of Rich, (not so much Jack) I’ll wait until it drops in price I think.

  • Charon

    I like this list, for some reason.

  • stryker1121

    But aren’t u doing all that mundane door opening when androids, crazy humans and a scary alien are breathing down your neck?

  • Grimhound

    The criticism with this is one I can agree with. I’m not much a fan of the Amnesia style of horror games. In Alien: Isolation you eventually get a magnum revolver, shotgun, flamethrower, etc. Yet the only way to fend off the alien is with the flamethrower, and it’s still invulnerable to all damage. You can unload 5 shells of buckshot into it, yet apparently xenomorph carapace is just so strong they bounce right off. You can hit it with a pipe bomb, but apparently it’s just too powerful. You can blast it full pull with a flamethrower as it gets stuck in a corner, and it’ll just run away.

    These shenanigans render games unenjoyable. If you show me or give me or suggest to me “weapons”, and then make them useless without establishing a threat, then I’m going to be miffed. Standard xenomorphs aren’t that durable, but this game tries to play it like they are. And it’s just beyond my suspension of disbelief.

    Know what are good horror games? STALKER. Especially modded STALKER. Wandering through an anomaly-strewn wasteland at night with a magazine and a half of ammunition and a bottle of vodka. Suddenly snorks. Suddenly bloodsuckers. Suddenly vortex. Suddenly Russians.

    Such is life in the Zone.

  • Lional punsalot

    Here’s the thing, I think I have this figured out. There are two basic types of experience people have when playing alien isolation, those who become immersed in the game play will love the game and ignore all its faults. This may be especially true if you played the previous alien game and were disappointed.

    The second set of people think spending 90% of 20 hours opening doors and crawling through vents and hiding in closets boring so they begin examining the edges of the game, the flimsy story, the alien itself, everything gets critical examination because you want to know why you dont enjoy what everyone else seems to enjoy.

    The two sides can’t understand the others experience because they approached the game in different ways, which means to say you can’t rely on people opinion alone to craft your opinion.

    There is footage available of game play all over the internet which you can watch to decide if the game play suits you then wait for the price to drop and buy in and find out which of the above camps you fall into. Until then don’t let what others say hold so much sway over what you think. Approach the game from your own perspective not another s.

  • Lional punsalot

    Backpedaling then doubling down, class act all round.

  • sciencemile

    Eh, if I want to be doing something menial while constantly afraid that something is going to creep up behind me and kill me, I’ll turn off peaceful mode in minecraft.

  • sciencemile

    They should play the CDI Zelda Game <_<

  • Alex Lee

    So, the only use the guns have is to kill other people, right? There are no useless tools, right?

  • Grimhound

    The guns are more to kill people and the androids wandering around.

  • megabearsfan

    Their criticisms aren’t necessarily *wrong*, but they leave out details that mitigate those criticisms:

    – The game is 90% opening doors. But you are doing it under duress.
    – The main story is crap. But the secondary story about the station itself, and the economic conditions that caused its failure is actually quite good and poignant.
    – Yes, if you stare at the alien and follow it around, it stops being scary. Same is true with any other horror game. But if you play on Easy or Normal, turn the brightness up (so you can get your pretty, visible screenshots and gameplay video), and go out of your way to follow it around, then of course you’re going to see too much of it. Don’t turn the brightness of the game all the way up and then complain that the alien isn’t hidden in shadows like it was in the movie!

    For a second opinion: http://www.megabearsfan.net/post/2014/10/26/Alien-Isolation-game-review.aspx

  • John4

    Idk personally I thought the game was fun and pretty well done, maybe it just depends on what kind of games people are into but I am personally a fan of the game and the series as well. I also like this review of the game: http://www.gamingrants.net/alien-isolation-review/

  • I’m dead now… sad face.

    amen

  • LeonTrollski

    Perhaps call of duty is more your speed.

  • Kyle

    The = with a ~ over it means “is congruent to.” I think you meant “is approximately,” which is represented by a ~ right on top of another ~.

  • Kyle

    Well if you’re supposed to be running from just a single alien, of course they don’t want you to kill it.

  • Kyle

    You know it’s gonna be great when it follows the Inception foghorn trailer trope!

    Although considering the franchise, perhaps a Prometheus siren would be more appropriate.

  • jay (Fragnon) stein

    I’ve been playing this game for a while and I happen to think it’s very, very good. I have a feeling Rich gets “game fever” and tries to finish the game as fast as he can. This is not a game to just sit down and blast out, it needs to be taken little by little over time, this helps with the perception of repetitiveness as trying to get through a lock-down space station would involve a lot of hacking and opening of doors. So my advice is to get game and don’t try to blast through it, sip it like a fine bourbon whiskey..

  • Brundlefly

    Here’s the thing, I think I have this figured out. There are two basic types of experience people have when playing alien isolation. Those who understand it has faults but learn to appreciate the adequate stealth game play (something the industry lacks tremendously) ; especially at higher difficulties, while also soaking in the eerily accurate atmosphere which clearly had some degree of passion behind it.

    The second set of people suck at the game or just miss the entire point – they get caught up on the little things (i.e infrequent basic door sequences meant to occasionally add suspense to game play) and ultimately walk away sour. Instead of giving people who value their opinion the benefit of admitting the game wasn’t for them they decide to twist their negativity into a long winded and nonsensical criticism that is opiniofact.

    What do I think? I’d argue it got a lot of mixed reviews more than anything, the positives were that whoever made it clearly enjoyed the original film and that was a highlight for many critics. It’s an okay game.
    The repetitive elements ‘puzzles, button sequences..’ are there only to punctuate sequences most people would consider an already grating frustrating experience, especially if you end up dying with meaningful progress – and especially if you hate dying and/or losing progress. The game lends itself to short challenging sessions.
    Some more negatives, cut scenes were bland as was the dialogue, the repetitive elements were in fact..repetitive (again to that end it is a puzzle game to an extent so that criticism is somewhat moot,) the latter part of the game is stretched out and slow with drawn out quick time events ‘something the core game play prior shines for not having.’

    I’d say 65% percent of the game is golden, the beginning is slow and the ending is just monotonous – the real pride this title carries with it is the Alien AI and by some measure the android combat. On higher difficulties dealing with both of these enemies offensively or defensively becomes a true test of survival with limited resources. The nail biting sequences where you try to make progress while being hunted down are glorious. I recommend nightmare mode.

    Personal Highlight: Banging a wrench off a table leg to alert the xenomorph when you are surrounded by looters whom are inches from shining a flash light on you. Then proceeding to watch swathes of blood spew back and forth with the whiplash of an aliens tail as you hope you picked the lesser of two evils.

    7.9/10 I loved it though.

  • Variant

    Every AvP game did horror better in the Marine campaigns and you were armed to the teeth in those. Being helpless doesn’t automatically make something scary.

  • Kyle

    Can you explain why you love Alien Isolation?

  • Foreman 371

    what makes you wander on your tiptoes is to accomplish something but then not immidiatly beeing able to save that progress right away. In these moments when the beast is hunting you or suddenly stands right before you you feel fear without thinking about it. That’s what always confuses me if people then brought up Penumbra or Amnesia as the better (“more intelligent”…) alternatives. It’s a different experience, there is nothing really to lose like in AI. There is no survival aspect and only the synergy of horror and survival is what works in AI and btw loved people so much about the classic Resident Evil games.

  • Not really my genre I guess – thing is I wish games like this would do something more inventive with the survival aspects of it. Like if I could use my intuition and creativity to avoid monsters I could definitely get into it – I’m just not seeing that here though. I remember when the first Penumbra came out – and I’m thinking like way back this may have been an early, free tech demo not the full Overture game – they showcased how you could do things like lean a chair against a door to delay a monster breaking through, giving you a chance to hide or escape. I don’t think I ever played all the way through any of the full releases, but I played some of Black Plague and I just don’t remember seeing anything like that in there. I think I recall putting a chair against a door and then the monster came up to the door and the door flung open, pushing the chair out of the way. I feel like the genre has been stagnated to “hiding in closets” – and I like stealth games but this ain’t no Thief. But anyway I want more shit like that – let me lay traps, let me delay the approach of a persistently rendered predatory creature, not one that just spawns out of vents without any continuity.

  • Havok Solo

    it is a survival game, not a action game. I enjoy the story, would not want to replay it but very enjoyable

  • MerryRobotJanitor

    “I’m wearing panties”
    -Rich Evans

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