Joe Versus the Volcano – re:View

September 24, 2017302 Comments

Josh is joined by Jim from Canada to discuss one of their favorite movies, the Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan romantic comedy adventure film Joe Versus the Volcano, which flopped badly when originally released in theaters in 1990 despite being a great movie.


Filed in: re:View

  • danzinski

    Giving this a chance even though I don’t see Mike or Jay or the AIDS guy.

  • I caught the office speech and thought this movie was garbage… Because I did not have the context of it being this sort of surreal strange movie. In that context the goofy speech makes a lot more sense.

  • Terriosaurus Hex

    Two strangers talking about a film I’ve never seen or heard of in my RLM entertainment?? I…I don’t feel comfortable with this, I need to call my psychologist for advice on how to proceed.

  • SqualrusWalrus

    I am so stunned they took the time to write this script. I would love to know if mike wrote it alone or if jay also helped. If anyone has info please update?

  • RLMkeepitup

    robert stack as a doctor is pretty funny bros. that harsh blue zombie lights of the eternal workspace

  • Mathew Calaway

    Is this self parody?

  • RLMkeepitup

    good episode for Jim, he looks drunker than Mike so that helps

  • ima420r

    One of my all time favorite movies! Seen it so many times, and I never noticed the ducks. When I saw it in the theater I thought it was a comedy, but these days it seems less funny and more of a drama. I guess that’s what 27 years will do to a persons perspective.

  • EJ

    I love the first 2/3 of this movie. It kinda falls apart when they get to the island though.

    Though you gotta love that they made a mainstream hollywood movie where the premise is based on tricking a depressed person into committing suicide.

  • Sam

    I saw this as a kid, and that sequence of being stranded on the raft of lashed-together steamer trunks has been tattooed on my brain ever since. His address to the moon is really amazing.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    “Octopi” is not how to pluralize “octopus,” because it’s a Greek word. It’s properly “octopuses” or “octopeds.” You’re welcome.

  • EJ

    Jim seems like a fun drunk, which is good since he gets pretty hammered during these.

  • EJ

    Actually the truly pedantic plural is “octopodes,” not “octopeds.” Most modern dictionaries say both “octopuses” and “octopi” are correct, since it is also considered to be a Latin word.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I’ve never actually seen this film, but you’ve piqued my interest.

    I’ll have to look it up.

  • playdude92 .

    Tom Hanks is the ultimate “I could be that guy” guy. Of course, you couldn´t be, really. But he makes you FEEL like you could be, the feeling of identification is through the roof.

  • ChildofLight

    The question is why did we never heard of it. Normaly the TV people can’t wait to throw movies at us where Tom Hanks is in it.

  • ChildofLight

    In this movie maybe because he acts as the “I could be that guy” but mostly he fullfills more the role that Henry Fonda had in his prime. As a moral instance. Almost to an angelic level. And thats where it gets weird for me. Absolute good people….can judge you absolute. They can throw the “first stone”.

  • EJ

    He’s a harder working actor than he gets credit for. There’s a really fun commentary track on the Apollo 13 DVD with Jim and Marilyn Lovell where Marilyn mentions that he clearly studied Jim in detail, because he nails all of Jim’s mannerisms and movements.

  • Ret Marut

    Whit Stillman would approve.

  • Terriosaurus Hex

    Abney park – The wake …For years i wondered where they got the vocal samples used in the intro and outro for that track. Now, finally, that mystery is solved!! Enjoy the whisky! I’m off to celebrate…

  • Andrew Carter

    Joe Dante vs. Volcano’s Peak

  • Who vs the what now?

  • Ret Marut

    “Ladies and Gentlemen, we are beginning our decent into Los Angles.” The Graduate anyone?

  • Derbrererd

    I know he can get the job.
    But can he do the job?
    I’m not arguing that with you.

  • Scumfall

    i got over excited by the fugazi t shirt , then despondent at the realisation that it wasnt a fugazi tshirt but some shit metal band instead , then was buoyed by remembering fugazi and put the first ep on , then was depressed that it wasnt as good as i remember , except for glue man ,that made me happy ….. so an emotional roller coaster of an evening there for a bit .

  • I just put on “Wugazi” the Fugazi/Wutang mashup album. Basically if you like Wu-Tang, and you like Fugazi, you’ll like it, it’s actually thoughtfully produced.

  • DanceOfBirther

    This will suffice instead of the re:View for Nothing but Trouble .

  • Scumfall

    wouldnt the plural just be octopus , at least until you got to 8 ?

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    How come Jay looks stockier? And how could Mike manage to grow a beard and go bald in just a week? I’m so confused…

  • EJ

    Wait that’s a thing? Is it good?

  • EJ

    It’s also a thing they say when you’re on a plane into LAX.

  • I like it. I’d put it up there with Wu Tang vs. The Beatles: Enter The Magical Mystery Chambers. Which means it’s quality.

  • I like it. I’d put it up there with Wu Tang vs. The Beatles: Enter The Magical Mystery Chambers. Which means it’s quality.

  • So does he beat the volcano or doesn’t he?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    KO in the fifth round.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The answer to all these question is “climate change.”

  • Pop Culture Reference

    No Colin? Now I’m pissed!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Was the descent decent?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Dante vs. Hell

  • Pop Culture Reference

    No one asked.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or at least he will approve, when he’s done singing “Constance Frye” with Winthorpe and Claus von Bulow over there.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It’s all part of the RLM-branded Insufferable Hipster T-shirt line. Buy 3 and you get a 6-pack of PBR to drink ironically.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Apollo 13’s engineering is like a box of chocolates …

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’m sure Foxconn moving to Wisconsin is going to make a lot of workers feel incredibly happy. At least before they jump off the roof.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It’s symbolism! DON’T YOU GET IT???

  • DanteSuckfest202

    Solid film; solid review; solid lack of one specific spoiler.

    Good stuff, guys. Josh and Jim really know how to actually talk about movies. The two of them continually impress me with their knowledge and insight.

  • Jim’s got soul. Josh has a beard. It about evens out.

  • Kawaii as Fuck

    Good lovin’! Good lovin’! Good lovin’!

  • EJ

    Foxconn is happy with the massive tax breaks Walker wants to give them. You know, because Republicans support small businesses.

  • EJ

    Josh gets a lot of shit from the commenters here and I don’t know why. I like him.

  • RLMkeepitup

    it’s VERY RICH

  • EJ

    2 quadrupeds = 1 octopus.

  • EJ

    RLM usually drinks New Glarus, and I don’t blame them. It’s probably all I’d drink if I lived in Wisconsin.

  • hector

    I know he can get the job.But can he do the job?I’m not arguing that with you.

  • I feel like it’s just because the commenters have given up on trying to get rid of Jack and they’ve moved onto the next thing to bitch about. Out of the lot I wouldn’t call them the black sheep, but certainly the lesser fan favorites. I enjoy all the RLM guys, I think they’ve got a good group dynamic no matter who is onboard at the time.

  • Gehakt_Sausje

    Tom Hanks is the ultimate “I could be that guy” guy. Of course, you couldn´t be, really. But he makes you FEEL like you could be, the feeling of identification is through the roof.

  • Daniel Bakke

    Tom Hanks is the ultimate “I could be that guy” guy. Of course, you couldn´t be, really. But he makes you FEEL like you could be, the feeling of identification is through the roof.

  • ChildofLight

    doki doki

  • I think maybe I saw this when I was too young to understand it.

  • langweilig

    Saw this when it came out on vhs in germany and found it entertaining, but never watched it again. The review did not convince me for it to be interesting to me, but whatever: you talk about movies you love and make an entertaining show from it. thumbs up and keep on…thank you!

  • EJ

    Yeah I don’t get the hate for Jack either; I think the whole RLM team is pretty solid.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Is it me or is the symbolism in Joe vs. The Volcano just as hokey and ham-fisted as Mother!?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Luckily Darren Arnofsky’s “Mother!” is written with symbolism aimed at sleepy toddlers.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    His hipster t-shirts.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I stick with absinthe and bottom-shelf vodka.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    And several cephalopod bishops working for the Catholic Church would be octopederasts.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It makes me jump for joy!
    **jumps off roof of Wisconsin Foxconn factory/suicide fun park**

  • EJ

    I think it’s getting something of a reappraisal lately, but at the time the reviews were pretty bad and it was a big flop at the box office, so it has a pretty bad reputation.

  • EJ

    If you’re keeping score at home, the tax credit amounts to nearly $250K per job created. They could just choose 13,000 Wisconsinites, give them $250K apiece, and they wouldn’t have to work for Foxconn.

  • Moist

    Hey, common courtesy requires you to give us a spoiler alert.

  • Moist

    So what does Abe Vigoda symbolize? Lazarus?

    Oh, shit, he actually died last year. RIP.

  • Joe

    Remember in Half in the Bag when Mike got called back from Vacation because everybody wants to watch “Mike and the other guy” and nobody wants to watch “The other guy and some OTHER other guy”?

    This is like “The other other other other guy and the other other other other other other guy”

  • Joe

    Remember in Half in the Bag when Mike got called back from Vacation because everybody wants to watch “Mike and the other guy” and nobody wants to watch “The other guy and some OTHER other guy”?

    This is like “The other other other other guy and the other other other other other other guy”

  • Joe

    But who has the AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDS?

  • Chowderbatter

    I enthusiastically support the ever expanding RLM Cinematic Universe (RLMCU). These two guys are fun to watch. Keep up the good work, fellows (and gals?).

  • Chowderbatter

    But seriously, you guys must know some female type people. Surely, there must be some smart, funny, nerdy women you can add to the team?

  • Chowderbatter

    And they both have booze.

    So, all is well.

  • Chowderbatter

    Solid from top to bottom.

  • Chowderbatter

    Other 1990 movies that deserve a re:View:

    The Freshman, Arachnophobia, Dick Tracy, Metropolitan, Mo’ Better Blues, Flatliners, Wild at Heart, Pump Up The Volume, After Dark, My Sweet, Darkman, Pacific Heights, Miller’s Crossing, Memphis Belle, Jacob’s Ladder, The Krays, Misery, Edward Scissorhands, and, yes, Godfather Part III.

    Holy shit. I’m only now realizing that 1990 might have been the all-time best year in film. It’s absolutely loaded.

    And my list is just some of the lesser knowns. There are plenty of other films that year which are classics or flawed in some way, but still entertaining.

    RLM could do an entire series on the films from that year.

  • Spoiled Ants

    Definitely, he beat that volcano so much that it errupted in his face.

  • Spoiled Ants

    Proably getting in shape for the next Eminem tour.

  • Spoiled Ants

    The Fugazi – Metallica joke/reference is lost on me. Anybody care to explain it in a way that a 9-year-old could follow? (preferably with sock puppets)

  • Bruce

    I hope Mike isn’t too down after that awful Star Trek premiere. It was as joyless and depressing as a real STD. It’s like they took the DC cinematic universe he hates and made it into a Star Trek show. I actually think the 3rd episode of The Orville was closer to Star Trek than ST:D may ever be. How does this even happen? Oh yeah…Alex Kurtzman.

  • Bruce

    I hope Mike isn’t too down after that awful Star Trek premiere. It was as joyless and depressing as a real STD. It’s like they took the DC cinematic universe he hates and made it into a Star Trek show. I actually think the 3rd episode of The Orville was closer to Star Trek than ST:D may ever be. How does this even happen? Oh yeah…Alex Kurtzman.

  • christian

    I’ve never actually seen this film, but you’ve piqued my interest.I’ll have to look it up.

  • Are the members on his shirt from Metallica? I haven’t listened to those guys since like 5th grade when I was rocking the black album.

  • They did say that there is essentially no subtext to the movie, it basically spells everything out for you up front- so it’s not like it’s supposed to be subtle. They show the conversation in the limo as an example because if you were to ask “so what are they talking about” then someone would just repeat back exactly what they said in the scene.

  • cr4gz

    Two strangers talking about a film I’ve never seen or heard of in my RLM entertainment?? I…I don’t feel comfortable with this, I need to contact my psychologist for advice on how to proceed. And a doctor for that guy with the high blood-pressure.

  • cr4gz

    Two strangers talking about a film I’ve never seen or heard of in my RLM entertainment?? I…I don’t feel comfortable with this, I need to contact my psychologist for advice on how to proceed. And a doctor for that guy with the high blood-pressure.

  • EJ

    The last time they regularly had a woman on the show the creepy comments were out of control.

  • EJ

    It’s Trollception!

  • EJ

    Shirts with “FUGAZI” and then a picture of some other random band were already a thing back when I listed to Fugazi on the regular. Glad to see the tradition lives on.

  • Brian Levine

    I fell asleep halfway through. Anybody know why the Klingons spoke like it was a remedial class in Klingonese?

  • EJ

    So it was exactly what it looked like in the trailers? Glad my decision to skip it was validated.

  • EJ

    Who is the top and who is the bottom?

  • Moist

    Probably because they’re portrayed by non-Klingons. How does Hollywood expect to correct its diversity problem when it refuses to cast genuine Klingons in Klingon roles?

  • EJ

    Remember back in the day when internet Grammar Nazis were at least actually correct?

  • ChildofLight

    ok. thats plausible. Bye bye conspiracy theory about medias hiding anti capitalistic movies to keep us in the dark…or grey…

  • Angela

    Excellent. Well-groomed Josh and tipsy Jim make a good team.

  • MrJohnClarke

    Liked first 2 episodes. Klingon pronounciation doesn’t mean squat to me of course and has nothing to do with what’s good about Star Trek. The look of the Klingons neither of course. But I guess it’s moving away from things that you know… and that must seem scary to you.

    I enjoyed it, cheers! 🙂

  • Cat Stowell

    i saw joe vs. the volcano in the theatre cause I loved Big and The Burbs. Glad to see it finally get some well deserved love after all these years. Also, I think Josh and Jim may be my favorite RLM team up ever. For Real. Keep up the good work.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I love the movie Bill vs the Tornado!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Here. Take some Ambien.

  • You mean Twister?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    But is Donald Rumsfeld any good at acting? We’re talking about Klingons, right? Those warmonger aliens with ridged foreheads? So, yeah, Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    No, unless you mean Twister starring Dermot Mulroney and Crispin Glover.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Haven’t RLM message boards always been a bastion of urbane discourse? Or are they like every other Internet forum, a Sarlacc pit of toxic masculinity, outdated memes, and political extremism?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’ve never seen the movie, but seeing that horrendous third act makes me want to avoid it. It’s where Magical Realism takes a hard right turn into Racist Shtick.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Did someone say “Rich”?
    **eats obligatory fistful of Tums**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The Canadian Piss Tub will be ready for Trump’s upcoming State Visit/Golden Shower/Twitter Rant.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That movie is like a Marx Bros. movie if David Cronenberg directed it.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    They should do one with Megadeth and Death Cab for Cutie.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Before the Internet anschluss by Actual Nazis?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    But there wouldn’t be any workplace-related suicide? Where’s the fun in that? Everyone knows Scott Walker can’t get a half-chub unless he hears a news story about worker fatalities. It’s common knowledge.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Anti-capitalism is all the rage, man! The revolution is nigh!

    At least that’s what it says on my t-shirt I bought from Hot Topic for $35.

  • EJ

    No, racism isn’t the problem. I think actually they deliberately didn’t want the tribe to resemble any sort of real group of Pacific Islanders, so they just made their culture totally random. Except random != funny so we have to endure 20 minutes of allegedly funny stuff like the tribe loves orange soda and Abe Vigoda is their chief, none of which is actually funny.

  • Moist

    “In a world determined by chance, only one man can right foot red, left hand yellow, right hand blue, right hand green, left foot red.”

  • Chowderbatter

    You can’t give in to the man children and misanthropes of our world.

  • Chowderbatter

    You can’t give in to the man children and misanthropes of our world.

  • Moist

    “What he didn’t realize is that his latest challengers aren’t men at all: they’re octopedes!”

    Comment section callback! Frr-frrr-frrrrnnnn!

  • Chowderbatter

    Let’s spin Rich Evans’ Wheeeeelll of Gaaaaaayyy to find out.

  • I literally just wrote this but I think because I referred to past examples by name my comment was pending moderation. It must have been bad enough to warrant some form of mass censorship I guess.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    At least your comment wasn’t as self-referential as Josh’s t-shirt. If Josh’s t-shirts get any more self-referential, they’ll tear a hole in the time-space continuum.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The Burbs is a cinematic masterpiece. Also, it has Carrie Fisher with short hair, which is somehow just as sexy has her hair-earmuffs in Star Wars.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Who says STDs can’t be entertaining? Late-stage syphilis has insanity and body parts falling off.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The socks go on our hands, right? Asking for a friend (actually, asking for The Red Hot Chili Peppers).

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Is it me or is the Wow, So Random! even more horrible than culture-specific racism? It’s not racist per se, but condescending as fuck. It’s funny in the same way Prometheus is scientifically accurate. Or Terminator: Genisys is narratively coherent.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I know what you mean. Just the day I was mowing the lawn, having a beer, watching football on TV, and winning back-to-back Best Actor Oscars.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Roy Cohn?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    All of them?

  • Moist

    Hey, bro, the orange soda gag was the only thing I liked about this bullshit movie.

    So now I hate you.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    J&B is a magical elixir.

  • Bleurgh

    My biggest problem with the new Star Trek is the lighting. It’s too dark.

  • Bleurgh

    There is a female member of RLM involved in production. If you write her name your comment will get flagged for moderation. Unfortunately the internet is a cesspool filled with assholes, so I don’t blame her for taking a less visible role.

  • Barry Meltfarb

    Well…take Somethien.

  • Bleurgh

    I wish Mike were on twitter so I could hear what he thinks about the new Star Trek. Reckon they’ll HITB it?

  • Bleurgh

    Does the new Star Trek finally have a gay character. I always find it kind of rediculous when people talk about Roddenberry vision of utopia being a place where people are judged on their own merits rather than their race or whatever, because there’s no gay people. They don’t exist in the future for some reason. I mean sure, Riker dated an intersex / hermaphrodite alien in one episode, but there isn’t one gay person in the future other than that? Really progressive.

  • Moist

    I, too, can’t believe that time is a thing that happens linearly.

  • Chowderbatter

    Us non-assholes need to push back. We can’t let man-babies sideline half of the species.

  • Bleurgh

    Your comment is nonsense.

  • Bleurgh

    So far I do think this is a much better prequel series than Enterprise, glad they went with something close to the original theme for the intro, that awful song on Enterprise was the worst.

  • Bleurgh

    Unfortunately we’re outnumbered.

    I’m pretty sure they are still on good terms and she still produces some of the content. They haven’t erased her entirely, she’s in quite a few of the older episodes.

  • Bleurgh

    Unfortunately we’re outnumbered.

    I’m pretty sure they are still on good terms and she still produces some of the content. They haven’t erased her entirely, she’s in quite a few of the older episodes.

  • Thanatos

    But it’s much better and darker than the other series, that means it’s the best.

  • Thanatos

    Maybe it got weeded out through gene therapy in the 2100s

  • Bleurgh

    Sick of tv and film confusing darker themes with darker lighting. So far I am enjoying this much more than Enterprise though. I like that they’ve abandoned the episodic structure. Might even be better than Voyager, but it’s too early to say. The first few episodes at the very least are much better than the first few episodes of voyager.

  • Bleurgh

    Sick of tv and film confusing darker themes with darker lighting. So far I am enjoying this much more than Enterprise though. I like that they’ve abandoned the episodic structure. Might even be better than Voyager, but it’s too early to say. The first few episodes at the very least are much better than the first few episodes of voyager.

  • Bleurgh

    Sick of tv and film confusing darker themes with darker lighting. So far I am enjoying this much more than Enterprise though. I like that they’ve abandoned the episodic structure. Might even be better than Voyager, but it’s too early to say. The first few episodes at the very least are much better than the first few episodes of voyager.

  • fred

    Simple scenes made with conviction. The movie kind of loses me when they get to the island, but still a great film.

  • fred

    I thoroughly enjoyed most of new Twin Peaks.

  • fred

    Just watch the first half and fast forward to the volcano once they get to the island.

  • Bruce

    The Burbs is the most underrated comedy ever. I would love to see a re:View episode on it from RLM. Looks like Jay is a big fan of the movie.
    “Joe Dante is one of the most underrated directors of all time and he deserves better than stuff like The Hole and Burying the Ex.”
    “The Burbs is my favorite of his, aside from Gremlins.”

  • Bruce

    If that is the primary concern you have for a show, two male aliens had a baby girl on The Orville and want to give it a sex change at the start of the episode. They are also a married couple who are regular crew mates and one is third in command and on the bridge all the time. Won’t tell you where the episode went from the start, because it was a pretty interesting and has to do with their species culture etc. I didn’t even want to give the show a chance, but after I was disappointed in Discovery I watched the first 3 episodes after seeing many other ST fans reccomend it and was pleasantly surprised. My critique with Discovery has to do with it just being depressing. Star Trek for me, was always an uplifting message and about working together or seeing things from a different perspective. ST wanted you to think, but didn’t necessarily tell you what to think. The Orville seems to have that down. Little too much potty humor for my tastes (not much in the third episode) but nothing is perfect. The creator of the show probably had that as a selling point to even get the show made. I like a lot of the humor though and it is probably most like the original series, which was also very lighthearted at times. I don’t know why the critics hate it so much. They hated the original series though to…so oh well.

  • Chowderbatter

    >> Unfortunately we’re outnumbered.

    Nah. They’re just yappier. We have the numbers.

  • EJ

    Nothing is worse than Wow, So Random! as a substitute for humor.

  • Moist

    My bad. Your argument that TV shows in the 60’s and 90’s should be more socially progressive than they were seemed to indicate that you had transcended mundane notions about cause, effect, and the way time works.

    Check out “Sexuality in Star Trek” on the wikipedia. There was going to be an episode of TNG where two dudes were holding hands in the background (which seemed like a HUGE deal at the time) but apparently it was never produced. Because children might see it and then they would be immediately turned gay. That’s how homosexuality worked back then.

  • EJ

    I can’t speak for Roddenberry specifically but when Star Trek came out even socially progressive people often had homophobic attitudes. Sodomy was a crime in most states and homosexuality was still considered a mental illness. The gay rights movement barely existed.

    Remember that even an interracial relationship was controversial when Star Trek portrayed one on TV – a gay character would have been right out, even if Roddenberry had wanted to include one.

  • Moist

    We all seem to be forgetting that Q was gay as fuck.

  • illnagas

    that’s typically modern and pointless nitpicking. No gay characters on Star Trek= Roddenberry was a homophobe. WTF is he supposed to throw it all in there or else he’s morally questionable?

  • bmcelvan .

    I know you guys mostly do movies…but are you going to review the NEW STAR TREK (Discovery)???

    I find it probably hard for Mike to resist!!

  • bmcelvan .

    Did you watch the new STAR TREK movie????? There is a gay bridge member

  • Moist

    That’s only one movie. Social equality won’t be achieved until every TV show, book, comic book, play, standup set, and child’s drawing feature’s a gay couple that nobody thinks is a big deal. The only way to achieve that its to make a big deal about “where are the gay couples that are totally not a big deal?”

  • Brian Levine

    Geordi was pretty cheerful most of the time.

  • EJ

    Yeah it’s easy to forget that Ellen DeGeneres coming out as gay, and then making her character on her sitcom gay, was a huge deal literally only 20 years ago. I think they started putting a parental advisory flag on the Ellen show after that.

    2 dudes holding hands on TNG would have been MAJORLY controversial.

  • bmcelvan .

    Totally agree…way too dark. It’s not a movie…it’s a TV show! I find it hard to believe that when designing a space ship the designers are going to make it difficult for people to easily see every component, button and device. Look at pictures of the ISS…it’s bright as hell in there.

  • EJ

    Rumsfeld is a Klingon? But I thought the Klingons were all about honor.

  • bmcelvan .

    Also agree about lighting versus tone. So far I’m a little disappointed but still am intrigued and want to see where it goes. Biggest issue so far is the lack of command in the command structure. I find it very difficult to believe that any officer would have lasted that long on a bridge while seemingly disobeying every order given to them. Picard Kirk, Janeway would have tossed their asses of the bridge long long ago.

    “Keep walking”
    We’re walking in the wrong direction…we need to get away from the storm

    “Do a flyby only”
    Ooops, I accidentally landed and then killed one of them

    “Do not fire”
    Nah, I’m going to be mutiness and want to blow their ship up

    Does she even follow one command in the first two episodes?

    That’s not Star Trek to me and certainly not how any command hierarchy would function. If she really was a captain for a decade or more, no way she would have been as lenient as she was. She really seems to lack any command of her ship at all.

  • Moist

    Now we just take it for granted that a lesbian pioneer will dance for our pleasure.

  • Well he was certainly flamboyant.

  • That’s unfortunate because that doesn’t sound the least bit pandering. Sounds like someone was just filling in the background imagery with stuff and that’s just how it worked out. I actually thought there was a bit of a missed opportunity in Star Trek – like – that episode where Riker falls in love with an ambiguously gendered alien? For the sake of bringing up socially-relevant issues it would have been more interesting if the alien then chose to be a man, but told Riker he was still in love with him. I almost thought it was a little weak that they went with a female actress from the getgo – sure they boyed her up a bit but it was clear that Riker was into her because she already looked feminine.

  • Bleurgh

    Sure, why not? He supposedly envisioned a future where everyone was included and got along with oneanother despite their differences. His whole intention was too depict that kind of world. It’s not like gay people were an abstract concept when next gen was developed and Roddenberry was very much involved in the process of developing TNG. The problem is he was a product of his time and either ignorant to or uncomfortable with acknowledging the existence of gay people.

  • Bleurgh

    I didn’t mean that he was a homophobe by the standards of the 1960’s which was someone who I guess aggressively abused gay people, but more that he was a homophobe in the way in which most people were homophobic in the 1960s in that they were ignorant of the struggle of gay people and didn’t understand it. I’m more annoyed with contemporary series like Voyager and Enterprise for not correcting Roddenberry’s oversight when they had the chance.

  • Bleurgh

    LOL! I always suspected De Lancey was playing the character that way, but let’s not forget that it’s heavily implied that he was sleeping with Picards ex-girlfriend so he was bisexual or pansexual at best.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I’ve spent 27 years missing the Tom Hanks from Big, The Burbs and Joe Versus the Volcano… *sigh*

  • Bleurgh

    As I said above, I don’t think Roddenberry was homophobic by the standard of the 1960’s, just that he was homophobic in the same way everyone in the 1960’s was homophobic. The lack of representation is a fault of the show-runners who proceeded him failing to correct his mistake.

  • Moist

    Yeah, when he got infatuated with the hologram it was disturbing on many levels. He and Data were meant to be together.

  • Bradd Scharping

    LOVE the shirt, Josh. lol

  • Bleurgh

    I get that people demand a lot of inclusive representation from the media they consume in this day and age and understand why some people think it becomes tiring and results in tokenistic characters, but you can’t argue that this demand for representation is dumb when it comes to Star Trek, because Star Trek at its core is ALL ABOUT representation.

    That is one of the main reasons for the shows existence in the first place and one of the reasons for its success and quite frankly if you don’t get that then you don’t fucking get the franchise at all.

  • Moist

    Yar, I had chemically impaired knee-jerk reaction to your OP. The whole thing is like, sure, Thomas Jefferson wrote some pretty words about equality and inalienable but then he still “owned” people.

  • illnagas

    sure why not lets find reasons to call everyone homophobic or whatever and we can rewrite history. Was he supposed to solve everything with a tv show? relax it was already ahead of its time without including homosexuals. Don’t point the holy finger of judgment just for fun or upvotes.

  • Bradd Scharping

    Where can I get one???

  • Moist

    All I want is a show about unattractive mediocre white dudes getting some top-shelf poontang. When will they make a show that finally caters to my desires?

  • Bleurgh

    History is homophobic. People of past eras were more homophobic than they are now. That’s a fact. Read my comments. I don’t place the blame of failing to include LGBTI characters on him, but on the show-runners who followed and failed to correct his oversight.

  • Bleurgh

    That’s a very accurate analogy.

    Also, Winston Churchill who I still consider an inspirational figure and great man, was racist as fuck by modern standards.

  • Bleurgh

    I agree with a lot of these criticisms, unfortunately impulsiveness, arrogance and ‘problems with authority’ have all become typical characteristics of heroic characters now. I don’t know what that says about us as a culture, but it’s unsettling.

    Hopefully they’re building to some kind of redemption arc with the central character where she realises by being in a position of power that these characteristics are actually intolerable in a subordinate and tend to fuck things up for everyone.

  • EJ

    Yeah that’s what I assumed you meant. I very much doubt Roddenberry had some virulent anti-gay agenda, but understanding and acceptance of gay people was pretty rare in the 1960s, even among progressive-minded people.

  • Moist

    At the risk of being told to shove my opinions up my asshole again, may I ask you to clarify what you’re trying to express here? I think many of us are puzzled.

  • EJ

    It’s a beautiful dream. Someday they’ll make a show where Kevin James gets to come home from his mediocre job and bang Leah Remini. Someday…

  • Moist

    If that day ever comes I’ll be shouting “yabba dabba doo, right to the moon!”

  • Bleurgh

    I think there should have been a gay character on TNG or Voyager or Enterprise. Sure it would have been controversial, but no-one working on TOS gave a shit that an inter-racial kiss was controversial in the 1960’s. The point that they were trying to make was more important than the controversy, but then suddenly a gay character is too controversial because people wouldn’t accept it. In essence, the franchise lost its teeth.

  • EJ

    That’s a fair point – TOS was willing to push the envelope, TNG played it safe.

  • illnagas

    someday in the future people will look at you and decide you are also homophobic, racist, etc.

  • Moist

    Was Janeway not gay? What about Scotty? Was Odo technically heterosexual or what?

    Or what if there are LGBTQ characters on the new show but it’s so woke that, since the characters’ sexuality hasn’t been relevant to the story, there’s been no need to comment on it? Can only speculate as I haven’t seen it.

  • EJ

    Scotty was obviously in a committed relationship with his sex robot, but there was no way they were gonna show that in the 1960s.

  • EJ

    The mid to late 1980s were such a high water mark for American film comedy that stuff that would be stone cold classic in other eras got lost in the shuffle. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels popped up on Netflix a while back and I watched it thinking “how did we just think this was an average, half decent comedy back in 1988. It’s brilliant!”

  • Bleurgh

    Definitely true and it’s all the more reason try and live and act in such a way that those people would be mostly proud and not too ashamed. That was what Roddenberry was trying to do. That’s why he put a rusky, black and a jap on the deck of the enterprise next to a white guy at a time when white people hated and despised ruskies, blacks and japs. The core theme of Star Trek was progressive politics. My post was me expressing disappointment that they didn’t really continue pushing the envelope in the same way it was being pushed at the beginning. TNG said ‘Lets replace the female black with a male black and the rusky with an android and the jap with an annoying spoilt brat white kid’ which worked out fine, but they could have been looking for ways to make the show be as boldly inclusive as it was at the start.

  • Bleurgh

    Definitely true and it’s all the more reason try and live and act in such a way that those people would be mostly proud and not too ashamed. That was what Roddenberry was trying to do. That’s why he put a rusky, black and a jap on the deck of the enterprise next to a white guy at a time when white people hated and despised ruskies, blacks and japs. The core theme of Star Trek was progressive politics. My post was me expressing disappointment that they didn’t really continue pushing the envelope in the same way it was being pushed at the beginning. TNG said ‘Lets replace the female black with a male black and the rusky with an android and the jap with an annoying spoilt brat white kid’ which worked out fine, but they could have been looking for ways to make the show be as boldly inclusive as it was at the start.

  • EJ

    MLK famously let his young daughters stay up late to watch Star Trek because Uhura was the only black female character on TV at the time who had an important, professional job. Inclusion matters.

  • EJ

    “Later, asshole! But thanks for winning the war!” – the British public to Churchill in 1945.

  • EJ

    Also a good thing to bring up – if you go by what Roddenberry himself stated about the show, the diversity of the cast was kind of the whole point.

  • Scumfall

    theyll probably do a re view of one of the films or a commentary or something and discuss it on that , like they did all the old and future alien films on their alien one and the same with terminator ,

  • Scumfall

    i thought Michele yeo and brought up by the vulcans woman may have had a thing going on , things that were nearly said and looks and stuff , i have no idea if any of the other characters are hetro but i deffo got the feeling those two had a thing .

  • Terriosaurus Hex

    Why you copy-paste my comment? Tbh…That’s more creepy than flattering.

  • HARRY TEXAS RAPE MACHINE

    Joe vs. the Volcano will be remembered far more than sleepless in Seattle or you’ve got mail

  • HARRY TEXAS RAPE MACHINE

    Joe vs. the Volcano will be remembered far more than sleepless in Seattle or you’ve got mail

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I see… And what is Fugazi? Some futa nazi variation? Do feel free to keep using those sock puppets to illustrate…

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    *fart*

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Sorry Variant; it’s just like with Inception: If you don’t get it you’re simply not cool enough.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Sorry Variant; it’s just like with Inception: If you don’t get it you’re simply not cool enough.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    William Shatter’s Kirk was in love with himself. Doesn’t that count as gay?

  • Brian Levine

    Love the episode when the real doctor found his fantasy hologram girl.

  • Brian Levine

    TOS had an episode called Metamorphosis where an alien creature fell in love with a human. Granted the creature turned out to be female, but the guy was creeped out that an alien thing was actually in love with him, even though the crew felt it was a totally normal thing. Thought provoking for 1967.

  • Brian Levine

    Except that the series became about her being gay instead of about her being funny, and bombed in the ratings.

  • Brian Levine

    Can you imagine if the character in Big was a 13 year old girl and had sex with some guy from her office? I guess being a guy makes it okay?

  • EJ

    Dafuq is a futa nazi?

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I never thought of it that way. A very good (albeit disturbing) point!

  • EJ

    Yeah the media narrative instantly went from “Here’s a cute little sitcom that people like” to “OMG there’s a gay character on TV!!” and with all that attention, it was bound to influence the quality of the show.

  • MrJohnClarke

    No and yes

  • EJ

    The critics have never forgiven Seth McFarlane for being successful with Family Guy, despite all of them hating it, so naturally they’re gonna trash this show. His stuff is extremely hit or miss for me, but I’m pleasantly surprised by The Orville so far.

  • Scumfall

    and its acronym is STD , what are they trying to say with that ?

  • ChildofLight

    You shouldn’t expect more than an “acceptable” type of reaction from Mike. He is a TNG fan. And since Voyager new shows are for TNG fans hard to watch believe me.

  • EJ

    The rest of the movie is so good it makes it worth putting up with the cringeworthy island scenes.

  • B_P_L

    If you’re gonna do a ‘too much whiskey for one guy in the glass’ sight gag, and you’re over the age of, say, 19 – maybe put a little extra effort into making it actually look like whiskey?

    I mean I know you’re not special effects guys or anything like that, but y’know…

    Oh wait…

  • bmcelvan .

    Oh I agree…I’m HUGE TNG fan and while I definitely still have interest in seeing where this one goes so far not a winner for me. For a bunch of reasons but the biggest one being: Did she (1st officer) actually obey even one single command in the entire premiere? She’d have been thrown off the bridge years before it got to this point if that was her regular behavior…bad example of how a bridge would really work.

  • bmcelvan .

    Thank guys!! Great review and about a movie I somehow missed…definitely going to check it out!!!

  • Brian Levine

    The big problem with You’ve Got Mail is that Kathleen never chooses Joe. He’s just sort of there by default. They could’ve fixed that with a two minute scene:

    Kathleen getting dressed to finally meet her email friend. After glancing several times at her computer, she walks over, walks away, walks back and finally sits down, opens up chat and types:

    Shopgirl: “Are you there?”
    NY152: “Yes.”
    Shopgirl: “I can’t meet with you.”
    NY152: “Why not?”
    Shopgirl: “Because I’m in love with someone else.”
    NY152: “Who?”
    Shopgirl: “……….The guy who put me out of business.”
    NY152: “How could you possibly love someone who did that to you?”

    She has no response.

    NY152: “Just meet with me and then you can do what you think is best.”
    Shopgirl: “Ok”.

  • JSP

    Saw this when it came out on vhs in germany and found it entertaining, but never watched it again. The review did not convince me for it to be interesting to me, but whatever: you talk about movies you love and make an entertaining show from it. thumbs up and keep on…thank you!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Thinking of the children out there I’ll simply answer “something you should definitely NOT wear on a T-shirt.” Aaaand back to the movie review…

  • ChildofLight

    sure. Now pay the million to the person this comment belongs to.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Yet another thing we can blame NAFTA for. The American anal probe industry gets off-shored to Mexico or China or whatever and Joe has to kill himself without shtupping that blonde chick.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    This commenter who stole this comment is worse than Hitler. Hitler was a shitty artist and a shitty human being, but at least his terrible art was original.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Don’t have you have to have sex first before get an STD?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Unless you’re my immediate family members who happen to be female.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It can’t be worse than TNG, Season 1.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    William Shatner: You know, before I answer any more questions
    there’s something I wanted to say. Having received all your letters
    over the years, and I’ve spoken to many of you, and some of you have
    traveled… y’know… hundreds of miles to be here, I’d just like to
    say… GET A LIFE, will you people? I mean, for crying out loud, it’s
    just a TV show! I mean, look at you, look at the way you’re dressed!
    You’ve turned an enjoyable little job, that I did as a lark for a few
    years, into a COLOSSAL WASTE OF TIME!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sounds kinky.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I found Odo to be a volcano of dark sexual charisma. Then again, I was watching while drinking cocktails made from Surge! and Zima.

  • Bleurgh

    Not unless he did the deed with an alternate timeline version of himself at some point.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sounds like the description of how the Trump men find hosts for their spawn.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I was dismayed at the local of characters that were people of color (POC) in 1950s Viking movies.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    History is always being rewritten. That’s how history works. A constant flux of revision, discovery of new material, and re-interpretations of the subject matter. You can revise this to some snappy one-sentence summary for use on Twitter or bumper stickers, since people are short-attention-span sub-morons right now.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    If there’s anyone left after the thermonuclear war / toddler slap fight between Little Rocket Man and Orange Circus Peanut.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It’s not like he decorated his penthouse with wall-to-wall gold and decorated it as like Liberace on acid. On an unrelated note: Trump hotels are super classy. Just look at how everything shimmers. Nice.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Why should a culture producer be forgiven when he or she creates abysmal garbage?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Easy fix: Say those 2 characters were part of the security detail and name them Clyde Tolson and J. Edgar Hoover.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    In that his “Declaration of Independence” was a sick burn to that jabroney King George III? That king got owned, man!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “Oh my god! The controversy! The moral rot! America has fallen!” — Roy Cohn

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The 80s had John Landis. We have Max Landis.
    **shudders**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Every scene is so dense.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    When did honor become hereditary? Have you seen Donald Rumsfeld’s forehead? You could grate cheese on it.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Steve Bannon with a foot fetish?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I don’t know if it is cringeworthy as more eye-roll-worthy. I’d be curious what The Rock thinks of the third act, since he’s Samoan. Besides, Joe vs the Volcano handles depictions of exotic races about as ably as The Phantom Menace.

  • B_P_L

    The problem with You’ve Got Mail is that it’s a 2 hour declaration from giant corporations that within a decade, every single aspect of our lives would be lived within the confines of the walled garden that they were making for us, and we should not waste our time trying to fight it. All disguised as a heartwarming romcom.

    Oh….that, and Meg Ryan’s fucked up facelift.

  • Bleurgh

    DS9 was quite watchable. Really interesting characters with complex morals.

  • Bleurgh

    Odo was a really interesting character. Especially considering in the earlier episodes he was just a puddle of liquid pretending to be a human-being and all of his weird personality traits were things he seemed to have chosen. I think his character lost a bit of its mystique when they introduced other members of his species who all seemed to share a lot of his weird traits.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    The best of both Shatners…

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Oh noes! Mike and Rich will be vewy, vewy angwy at you, PCR…

  • Gehakt_Sausje

    I fell asleep halfway through. Anybody know why the Klingons spoke like it was a remedial class in Klingonese?

  • Strelnikov

    I remember seeing Joe Versus the Volcano on VHS and a lot of the subtle background visual jokes were lost because of the standard full-screen VHS tapes were dubbed in…..you don’t get the full effect of the lighting changes and the lurch from reality to fantasy that the film goes through, which might be why the movie sunk like a stone when it hit the rental market in the early ’90s. I guess I need to track it down to see what it actually looked like.

  • Strelnikov

    I remember seeing Joe Versus the Volcano on VHS and a lot of the subtle background visual jokes were lost because of the standard full-screen VHS tapes were dubbed in…..you don’t get the full effect of the lighting changes and the lurch from reality to fantasy that the film goes through, which might be why the movie sunk like a stone when it hit the rental market in the early ’90s. I guess I need to track it down to see what it actually looked like.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    You’re one of those people who don’t like to know things. I recommend creating a Go Fund Me page for that lobotomy that will take you back to your ideal state.

  • Devil_Dinosaur

    Yeah, and “literally” now also means “figuratively.” Language is fluid! say people who have shitty diction and grammar.

  • growinggnar

    Roy Cohn?

  • cr4gz

    Probably because they’re portrayed by non-Klingons. How does Hollywood expect to correct its diversity problem when it refuses to cast genuine Klingons in Klingon roles?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Copycat? Plagiarist? Loser?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Copycat? Plagiarist? Loser?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It’s much harder now that Abe Vigoda is dead.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Follow the herd of hipsters.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    If I ever get a chance with Leah Remini, my mouth will be otherwise engaged.
    **slide whistle**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “Don’t you want to hear my thoughts on gassing Iraqis and harassing Gandhi as a diaper-wearing so-and-so?” — Winston Churchill

  • DemSpeed

    I am so stunned they took the time to write this script. I would love to know if mike wrote it alone or if jay also helped. If anyone has info please update?

  • matteo brun

    I know you guys mostly do movies…but are you going to review the NEW STAR TREK (Discovery)???I find it probably hard for Mike to resist!!

  • Tony

    Can you imagine if the character in Big was a 13 year old girl and had sex with some guy from her office? I guess being a guy makes it okay?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    **dips Act 3 into a vat of acetone**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Haven’t you seen Great Balls of Fire? Jerry Lee Lewis was a fan of his female teenage cousin. He didn’t work at an office though.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    You’ve Got Mail makes Sleepless in Seattle look like hardcore pornography.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That the fans are crabs.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    … in bed.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sounds like a pop cultural paradox.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “History is homophobic”? That’s a rather bold claim in that generalized blanket statement. Gay History isn’t homophobic, unless we’re talking about the biography of Roy Cohn or J. Edgar Hoover.

  • ChildofLight

    statistics say this one year too late for girls having sex. And their “friends” are ususally not younger…naturally. If critizising somebody maybe first have a look at your own backyard. Little advice that might come in handy in the future…

  • christian

    i thought Michele yeo and brought up by the vulcans woman may have had a thing going on , things that were nearly said and looks and stuff , i have no idea if any of the other characters are hetro but i deffo got the feeling those two had a thing .

  • Erwan Gaillard

    Sounds like a pop cultural paradox.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The third could be improved considerably if it had Abe Vigoda and the rest of the cast of “Barney Miller” on the tropical island. It would at least make more narrative sense and actually be funnier.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “Pan and scan” should be considered a war crime.

  • Strelnikov

    It was the fuzziness and lower resolution of even regular VHS play mode that worked against that film. Tarkovsky’s Stalker, with it’s gradual colorshift throughout the first third of the film, is absolute garbage on tape, even letterboxed.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Tarkovsky’s a talentless hack. He’s no Jaden Smith.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Was that also in Act 3 of Joe vs the Volcano?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’ll hide behind this whisper quiet Star Wars-branded Death Star Popcorn Popper / OSHA Violation Waiting to Happen.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Especially if the sex robot wasn’t a white Protestant. America wouldn’t stand for that kind of thing. (At least until they were done telling anti-Semitic jokes and scolding their African-American household staff.)

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Q was Star Trek’s version of The Great Gazoo.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I didn’t know Daniel Boone was a dancer.

  • growinggnar

    It’s a beautiful dream. Someday they’ll make a show where Kevin James gets to come home from his mediocre job and bang Leah Remini. Someday…

  • DemSpeed

    and its acronym is STD , what are they trying to say with that ?

  • DemSpeed

    and its acronym is STD , what are they trying to say with that ?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That people copying other people’s posts should get gonorrhea?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Not pizza rolls?

  • joran

    Did someone say “Rich”?**eats obligatory fistful of Tums**

  • joran

    Did someone say “Rich”?**eats obligatory fistful of Tums**

  • EJ

    It’s whiskey mixed with Orange Soda. Pay attention.

  • noel

    I saw this as a kid, and that sequence of being stranded on the raft of lashed-together steamer trunks has been tattooed on my brain ever since. His address to the moon is really amazing.

  • Hieronymus Friedrich von Münch

    man he does really love the movie, so cute

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