Jason Voorhees Smacks Someone Against a Tree for an Hour

September 13, 2013215 Comments

Happy Friday the 13th! Who needs a montage of all of Jason’s kills when there’s only one that really matters anyway?


Filed in: General UpdatesShort Films

  • Percy Gryce

    Only an hour? Come on, I’ve got five or six hours to kill today.

    “To kill today.” Get it? Ha, ha.

  • vensssenexplenkeet

    That was by far the best JVSSAATFAH, yet.
    The ending had me selling crack.

  • backsettio

    The title should be “How to prank your girlfriend while hiking”.

  • Sidewinder

    Your hack-fraudery has reached new levels of laziness.

  • FT

    Jason Voorhees Workout now online!

  • Still better than Man of Steel

  • Wasperheimer

    Going against the norm, today I shall read Friday the 13th comics instead of watching the movies.

  • MrJambo

    I don’t get it?

  • Guest

    You are one punny bastard, m8.

  • I fast forwarded to the ending. Turns out, she’s dead.

  • Oak Stave

    Take the clip you want to repeat, and convert it to a photo sequence. Reverse the order of the photo sequence using a free bulk renaming utility of some kind. Now convert the reversed photo sequence back to a video clip.

    Rather than just repeating the same clip over and over, resulting in a jerky piece of shit, you now have a fully reversible scene that looks somewhat convincing. Slow down the back swing, speed up the forward swing. It’s like he’s chopping wood! Hilarious!

    You’re welcome.

  • manly man

    So I guess that the Space Cop is in the bag. I’ve always known that Richh Evans screams like a girl.

  • Jason

    i didn’t like this. Man of Steel was better.

  • trololololololol

    Every frame is so dense

  • GoinToDaGymN’EatinBetter

    What a great workout video !

  • _

    Dear Jay and Mike, and the entire Red Letter Media crew:

    I’ve noticed that there has been an alarming flood of whiny fanboy
    babies and dipshit assholes all over the comments section(s) of your
    page, more and more so in the past few weeks (months?). Particularly on
    this episode. On behalf of us all, I want to apologize for this
    appalling and baffling Zergling rush of irritating buffoons exclaiming
    that you did this review without seeing the movie, turned into cynical
    pricks, lost your touch, sold out to Marvel, or otherwise taking your
    opinions personally, etc. These young children and their tirades do not
    reflect the views of your actual fans. I think I can speak for all of us
    when I say that we eagerly, but patiently, await new BOTW episodes,
    HITB episodes, Plinkett reviews, and original films, and we are as
    confident as ever that you will continue being awesome. Hopefully this
    squabbling nonsense going on in these comments sections will start to
    die down after awhile and we can, once again, have nice things.

    Sincerely,
    A Concerned Fan

  • Meester Smeeth

    I HAVE TO WATCH IT ALL IN CASE I MISS SOMETHING IMPORTANT

  • derp

    It appears you have lost your head…or your body…

  • ololo

    Thought this was going to be half in the bag. Turns out she’s wholly in it.

  • Seriously, who sleeps all the way inside the sleeping bag?

  • Or you could not clog the intertubes with pointlessly repeating video footage. Think of the children’s bandwidth!

  • ololo

    Those who wish the new cinema studio’s Friday the 13th Fin Ride(tm). Safe to say, it’s an experience

  • Bob JaBopistan

    They should have let the Canadian guy do this for them.

  • Daniel Bellfield

    Dammit.

  • Josh Crapplesnap

    I’m glad you put out a new HITB but doesn’t this one seem to be lacking in content? I didn’t see Rich anywhere.

  • George Lucas

    It’s stylistically designed to be that way, and we can’t undo that, but we can diminish the effects of it.

  • A I

    IMDB says this was the only movie Debora Kessler was in. I’m not saying this was a snuff film but it was probably a snuff film.

  • Dildo Knight

    @1:00:01

    “What’s wrong with your faaaace??”

  • Jay Stein

    Well its better than nothing…almost..

  • The Summer of George

    I liked the part where he swung the bag into the tree.

  • Saruma

    She looks surprisingly good at the end after being smashed for an hour. Just a little blood on the forehead.

  • Saruma

    I’m sure a bunch of film production geeks had no idea about this and their rough cut looping was in no way intentional.

  • Jack

    More like Man of Stool

  • missrowsdower

    It’s just so dense, there’s so much going on in every frame..

  • TapewormBike

    I fucking love you guys

  • Yawn

    But you alone are patiently waiting for more of your boyfriends to PIITB.

  • Duckler

    In Space Cop, no one can hear Rich Evans laugh.

  • stane

    This guy just doesn’t get tired, does he?

  • bob

    Or, you know, just duplicate the video, reverse it, delete the first and last frame of the reversed footage. That way you don’t waste your time and image quality converting anything.

  • jnorris441

    59 minutes in, I almost understood what the character was doing and then DAMMIT

  • Joe Syxpac

    Really?

    You couldn’t find Nyan Cat?

  • catnep

    This idea of yours could progress into the Rich Evans Droste effect. Rich Evans watching Rich Evans watching Rich Evans (watching) on an endless loop!

  • xxx

    this is retarded
    get of your lazy fu.king asses you fat fagots and give us what we want

  • yyy

    yeah guys get your fu.king asses to work you fu.ks. fu.k why does everyone have to be so reta.ded all the time.

  • Mark Bisone

    My favorite part was when Jason smacked the sleeping bag against the tree.

  • JAGUART

    After about thirty minutes, it gets kinda repetitive.

  • Johnny Two Melons

    I like it. Especially the part where Jason pulls off his mask and says he’s Khan.

  • catnep

    Haha! Very good.

  • The Summer of George

    Jason Voorhees Smacks Someone’s LEGS Against a Tree for and Hour.
    And, of course, not the big and readily-available tree, but the skinny little tree right next to it.

  • Poopfeast420

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  • Studio Executive

    This was our original rough cut for “The Lorax,” but the feedback from the test screening forced us to go with CG and start from scratch.

  • Poopfeast420

    in the blu-ray release its a red sleeping bag

  • Oak Stave

    Yep. Depends on the software you have available. I know they did it as a middle finger to people bugging them to update while they’re busy with other projects… I’m just sayin, a moment of effort would have made it a lot cooler.

  • Benzo

    Can I get this for my alarm clock?

  • Kyle George

    should have recorded a big sound loop of like a football in a bag smacking against a tree over and over or something to give it more variation.

  • Torgos_Giant_Knees

    These newer HitB episodes are far too long. I prefer the pacing of the older, shorter episodes.

  • Mark Bisone

    I sense this zergling memememe is going to be as big as vodka tampons and planking. Maybe even as both at the same time!

    http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-ZIxRa4TGD3I/TiBNAQTzZiI/AAAAAAAAA8Y/WrOxgucTdBU/s1600/plank-19.jpg

  • Lumberjacking Off

    This is one of the least efficient ways to cut down a tree.

  • stolliosis

    I’m going to use this a white noise to fall asleep.

  • TheSeacow

    i’d rather them make this real fast so they can get back to working on space cop

  • Percy Gryce

    I never really got the Friday the 13th series. I did see the third one in the theater in 3-D, with the yo-yo and bouncing ball and the arrows and eyeballs flying at the audience.

    I kind of liked Nightmare on Elm Street because it was sort of meta, sort of a precursor to Inception, and Freddy Krueger was an interesting, demonic villain.

    Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Last House on the Left, Halloween? Meh.

    But for me–and for other senior citizens, I would imagine–there is only one truly scary movie: Friedkin and Blatty’s The Exorcist (1973). It still holds up and nothing since has even come close.

  • 01coolwhip

    I swear after a while you start to here crazy shit.

  • Burgerlord

    It actually changes up near the middle somewhere. You have to watch the entire thing to see how.

  • Burgerlord

    No, but I did see the word MINI on one of the frames.

  • Burgerlord

    I’m waiting for the animated gif format.

  • Necrophagi

    I don’t get it, did he die today?

  • Necrophagi

    Rich Evans, Rich Evans, Why hast thou forsaken us?!?!

  • Cameron Vale

    Ah, yes. I was wondering what would break first.

  • Cameron Vale

    Give it time.

  • His name? Not Robocop

    Why aren’t we watching a video of Rich Evans watching this for an hour?

  • Mark Bisone

    Spoilers!

    Reagan breaks the air traffic controllers strike, and gets a second term.

  • Mohamad Taufiq Morshidi

    What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

  • cabbo

    Piss in the bag? Gays do that?

  • Rick McC

    Are you sure? There might be a deleted scene out there showing otherwise…..

  • Rick McC

    I told her not to hog the bug spray….

  • Rick McC

    But the sleeping bag held up well.

    The tree too.

  • It wouldn’t be canon. I’m amazed she continued to live the whole time, what with the screaming and all.

  • Mark Bisone

    I’d call this “memetic warfare”, but then I’d have to turn in my wallet.

    http://findmuck.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/badmofo.jpg

  • Joe Syxpac

    I didn’t see that, but I did see LAZY.

  • Evan Gorzeman

    UNSUBSCRIBE

  • Larfleeze

    A minute in and it stops sounding like a person screaming.

  • Jay Stein

    So, I just recorded about 4 minutes of the audio, gonna make a sick track..:)

  • ahm

    The Exorcist is just ridiculously overrated. Gimme Toby Hooper any day.

  • ahm

    Best comment of the thread! I’m kinda embarrassed I read this far down tho…

  • Daniel Bellfield

    hahahahaha just noticed the thin tree

  • Graig Lesbin

    Review Elysium already

  • Wes Craven

    “The Exorcist” has aged worse than a pair of my skiddy y-fronts. It was an important film of it’s time but nowhere hear as good as “The Omen,” mainly because the latter has a much stronger narrative.

  • Shaun Higgins

    HALLELUJAH!!!

  • Jada Pinket’s Nut Sack

    This needs to be reviewed upon release…

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2016940/

  • Jesus the Hutt

    I just downloaded it as an Mp3 and added to my Steve Reich´s anthology, fits like a glove, makes a beautiful soundtrack to my partner and myself staring at each other while eating Oreo Cakes awkwardly..

  • Percy Gryce

    Hey, I have admitted that I’m a doddering old fool, who’s too scared to watch a movie.

    Whaddaya want from me?

  • Percy Gryce

    “Gorilla warfare.”

  • Joe Syxpac

    Cuz Gregory Peck in bell bottoms is timeless.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Perhaps Batman should have covered himself in a sleeping bag while fighting Bane.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    That’s someone’s username on Disqus. You now owe him royalty.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Colon from Canada?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    This was the wittiest comment I’ve read on the whole forum.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    That chick and her sleeping bag are pretty durable.

  • Man of Stool

    I beat you to it.

  • Percy Gryce

    As Doctor Johnson said, he who would pun would pick a pocket.

    (BTW: I categorically deny that what you have posted is a candid photo of me.)

  • Percy Gryce

    Director’s cut?

  • Saruma

    With all the money they make off the fees they charge to view their videos they owe it to us to put up new content every few days!

  • Cameron Vale

    In a battle of wits, you are extensively trained in unarmed combat.

  • Now I Get It
  • Now I Get It
  • Now I Get It

    Classic mistake. YO, JASON! The bag cuts the wood on the pull stroke, not the push. …He’ll get it. Everyone’s gotta learn. (Goddam pie pan-wearin’ wannabe.)

  • Sphincter

    Friday was the 12th, you hack frauds!
    Haha, April fools~

  • Now I Get It

    Mmyes, a little too good. Up-vote withheld!

  • Now I Get It

    [Okay, well, that was an adventure and a half, trying to delete my own comment.]

    Ahem… Classic mistake. YO, JASON! The bag cuts the wood on the pull stroke, not the push. …He’ll get it. Everyone’s gotta learn.. [Apparently.] (Goddam pie pan-wearin’ wannabe.)

    Oh, I feel – and look – so much better now.

  • Now I Get It

    I watched it all and did miss something important. Several things, in fact.

  • Now I Get It

    Whippersnappers. They fight the same battle over casts from different eras of SNL, even though they always end up endorsing whichever cast gave them their first experience of sketch comedy.

    As my tutelage goes on here, I see that I shed the horror and monsters of my youth, and that the only schlock I really kept was within the western. So, my favourite schlock movie as such ends up being Sam Raimi’s “The Quick and the Dead”. When the story’s cut-rate elements are onscreen, I ignore my disappointment, stick with the movie’s main thrust, and enjoy my tale of revenge.

    For the record, when I clicked on “see more,” I jumped. Regan’s face is horrific and alive with ill-intent. Whoever doesn’t get that will just have to get something else, as I believe they will.

  • Ranulph Fiennes

    Hey, assholes……I live in Antarctica so when you posted this celebration of Friday 13th me and my pet Rock-Hopper penguin, Ozwald, couldn’t join in because it was already Saturday 14th! I am really disappointed at the level of racism RLM have shown here – completely ostracizing a number of countries from the southern hemisphere from their Friday 13th celebrations.

    P.S. Ozwald says “Waaaak you!”

  • Rick_Berman

    Ha, agreed sir!
    [neo] “i know Tai Chi”

    [Tiger Hu Chen] “show me”

  • cobrazombie

    “That’s a ‘Neddy No-No.'”

  • Jason Ross

    The audio in its entirety could have been recorded from my bedroom. When I last for an hour and three seconds — which happens very frequently.

  • Aden

    That would be jingoism…

  • WoodyBBad

    Jesus. I might have to quit clicking on your site before I go to Amazon to spend $$$$$$$$$$$.

  • jnoble

    If your character had been murdered so effectively in such a weak way, you’d leave the business too.

    But it’s probably a snuff film.

  • jnoble

    It’s like they rhyme.

  • jnoble

    How? Because more people died in such an disinterested manner?

  • jnoble

    I’ll shed a single tear for your butthurt. Happy now?

  • My favorite Friday the 13th is still Jason X. Jason…in the future…in space. What’s not to love?

  • Mr Heaven

    “You simply have to put one foot in front of the other and keep going. Put blinders on and plow right ahead.”

  • John Kerry

    Yes, Fiennes is a complete idiot! I was completely with the rational nature of his discourse up until that point.

  • Geahk Burchill

    You bastards.

  • Poopfeast420

    In the blu-ray release she swings jason in a sleeping bag against a tree for an hour first

  • catnep

    Lekker!

  • catnep

    Your standards are inscrutable.

  • Paul Woodcock

    I really like the bit where he swings the sleeping bag against the tree…

  • catnep

    This film scarred me and I think it holds up very well. I have no idea what the criteria for great horror is now. For me, this one has not been surpassed.

  • thatdouchewhodontlikeyourplaye

    Why is there no 10-hour version of this on YouTube?

  • Now I Get It

    They are to me, too. I did try remembering them, once, with an acronym, “ENVY”, but then I forgot what the letters stand for and just gave up.

  • Mark Bisone

    It will never go away. It can never be undone.

  • Now I Get It

    I’ll wear that.

  • Percy Gryce

    Now your screen name makes sense.

  • Now I Get It

    Some people have even called me fetching.

  • Percy Gryce

    Right. I was going to give an honorable mention to that one. I appreciate the producers’ good humor. To turn the proto-ghanist of a profitable horror franchise into a kind of “Black Adder” figure and shuffle him into the future does show a certain cleverness or self-aware humor. I believe that the producers of the Hellraiser series did something similar. Was there ever a future Freddy Krueger?

  • NeonNeo’sNylons

    [Chinese Government] We have lots of money to finance the film that Hollywood is too scared to.

    [Keanu Reeves] Show me.

  • Taft you FUCK

    Where’s the comparison Half in the Bag review between the third installment of the coveted Cornetto Trilogy “The World’s End” and the cinematic stillbirth that is “This is the End”? Give us what we want, you fat homos! Nobody cares about this crap! 😉

  • You Fuck Taft

    Relax. This took a lunch break’s amount of time to do.

    It’s whatever they’ve built that set for that’s making you wait. Presumably that will make them real money, to buy the time, to make more HITB/BOTW/Plinkett

  • Cum Sprite

    Seek medical attention.

  • Tom Cruise

    I would like to take this opportunity to fully endorse Mike Stoklasa’s heterosexuality…..even after seeing his photo on IMDB!

  • John Travolta

    Yes, Mike Stoklasa is most definitely straight and doesn’t like male airline pilots and or cock.

  • Paul Haggis

    I’m not sure about Jay and Beaker though….especially after that edition of BOTW where Beaker is sat next to Jay on the couch and starts hitting him like a girl (this scene was edited out after a few hours which is in itself a form of mea culpa).

    I think the wizard hipster likes fucking Wookies………

  • Taft you FUCK

    I was doing a bit. Ya know, like jokes and stuff. I ain’t mad at ’em. I wish them only the best.

  • Joe

    Considering Jay closed his the message board due to gay jokes about him I’d say he’s definately gay. Mikes all man though.

  • HeftyJo

    If it takes you an hour to beat a girl off, I don’t think you’re doing it right; or maybe you are — I dunno.

  • Wombat

    Or maybe Jay doesn’t believe in making fun of gays.

  • Franklin Floratos

    Backdoor Mayor, anyone?

  • Happy Hippocrite

    This is awful.

  • Meester Smeeth

    Y’all need to ditch that zero cat and get yo’self a hero… cat.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    What… what did you change?

    Also, there’s an edit feature, eh?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    It’s like that sleeping bag material is from the future… OF SPACE!

  • Now I Get It
  • Now I Get It
  • Now I Get It

    But with so many cool cats prowling around, should I choose this one…
    http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2011/175/f/1/nyan_cat_wallpaper_by_oborochann-d3jwf9h.jpg

  • Now I Get It

    If only editing were the solution, I’d have clicked that button the live long day. No, I’m afraid the problem was placement.

    I had replied to Lumberjacking Off instead of to Cameron Vale, and, purist that I am, I couldn’t stand to look at my post sitting in the wrong spot, so, I deleted it. But, then, when it didn’t delete instantly, I couldn’t stand to look at my new post either without adding the first and last paragraphs plus “[Apparently.]” as a little piece of self-mockery.

    Anyway, when I clicked to reply to you, I saw that my original post had been deleted after all, with no evidence that it was ever there. It’s just that it took about a day for Dingus to complete the request.

    (All of which sugggests that when we see evidence of a missing comment – “This comment was deleted” – it must have been the administrator who deleted it.)

  • Now I Get It

    Actually, I see I’m wrong again. The original comment is back. Dash it all, Dingus, dash it all.

  • Now I Get It

    Don’t take it so big. Do you think my driver’s license looks any better?

  • Christopher Kulik

    The two scariest movies I’ve ever seen are Roman Polanski’s REPULSION and THE CHINA SYNDROME. As for the THE EXORCIST, definitely well made but I think it depends on your religious persuasion to really get into it: personally, I found it rather hokey at times.

  • Real Quantum

    Not making fun of gays is gay.

  • Baxter

    I think that guy getting smacked against the tree said Jay was gay

  • Real Quantum

    With the notable exception of cutting down the mightiest tree of the forest with a herring.

  • Real Quantum

    I don’t think this is Jesus’s site.

  • Percy Gryce

    Regardless of your religious persuasion, does knowing that The Exorcist was based on a true story affect your reaction?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    I’ve tried to delete a comment before and it was unsuccessful. It turned into some anonymous “user’ comment or something, but still had my comment in it. It may very well still be there, lurking in the comments section of some “The Editing Bay” script…

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    the-editing-room.com/star-trek-into-darkness.html#comment-916201227

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    All I see are a series of deleted comments.

  • WoodyBBad

    But he spoke in Red Letters.

  • Real Quantum

    😀
    Indeed.

  • Tony Hemphill

    this is the best thing on the google ever

  • Now I Get It

    Thanks, I tried both the click and cut&paste method, and both got me there.

    So, like me, all you could do is make a joke (“I deleted you… HOW ARE YOU STILL HERE?!”), because when they took away your user name, they took your edit option with it – right? – so, you couldn’t just delete the actual words to leave your name above an empty space. The anonymous option is a drag, but I guess it’s the lesser of two disappointments.

    BTW, how to you like The Editing Room, in general? I’ve never been, but it seems like a playful site.

  • Mark Bisone

    That happened to me when I tried deleting my shoop of Mike’s face onto a haggard baby head. They were like, “Nuh uh! You can’t do that on television!” And then some godlike entity poured slime on my head. That was a weird day.

  • ident

    How exactly was Nightmare on Elm Street a precursor to Inception?

  • Now I Get It

    Those are weird days. So, when you got whizzed on from a great height – let me get this straight – your comment disappeared from your Dashboard but remained on the RLM site, or vice versa, or what exactly?

  • Mark Bisone

    All I remember is some disorienting comedy of errors that resulted in the word “delete” being twisted to mean “never, ever do fucking anything even remotely like delete.” It’s kind of like when our political class uses the word “investment” to mean “flush 90 percent of your hard-earned cash down the toilet, and spend the rest on golf trips, hookers and blow.”

    So, instead of vanishing, I suddenly became a “Guest”, then a butterfly, then a Star Child gazing down beguilingly upon the splendor of creation. Then someone farted.

  • Percy Gryce

    “I couldn’t stand to look at my post sitting in the wrong spot”

    When I say something like that, this witch appears and shrieks at me: “OCD, OCD, OCD.”

    And that witch is my wife.

  • Percy Gryce

    Why would you have done that? That would have been like Leonardo erasing the Mona Lisa or Michelangelo whitewashing the Sistine Chapel ceiling.

  • Percy Gryce

    Layers of dreams.

  • Mark Bisone

    I wanted to work on it some more, and my OCD witch was out coffin-shopping at the time (she claims she just wants to use it as a conversation piece / armoire, but I’m keeping my eyes peeled).

    As for those greaseball hackfrauds you mentioned, I can think of a few possible improvements.

  • Christopher Kulik

    Not really: neither did THE CONJURING, and I was actually freaked out by that one (one of the best films of the year in my opinion, and yes at times it did remind me of THE EXORCIST). I can’t deny that THE EXORCIST is a great movie in terms of its acting, directing, writing and special effects…yet, it didn’t really “scare” me. Few movies do…the remake of THE RING? Laughed my ass off to high heaven!!!

  • Now I Get It

    Crikes, what a crone. So few women can handle a true monomaniac. But, then, those who can are usually femme fatales, so…

  • Percy Gryce
  • Percy Gryce

    Tell me about it. She found a VHS that she wants me to send into RLM for WOTW. Now, number one, that’s my thang she’s trying to horn in on, and, number two, like most women she’s not funny.

    So, sure, honey, I’ll put that tape (garbage) right into the mailbox (garbage can) and send it to Mike & Jay (our garbage men). I can’t wait to see it on WOTW (in our local landfill).

  • Meester Smeeth

    You’re kinda spoilt for choice there. I’d go with whatever my heart tells me if I were you.

  • Now I Get It

    Good, good, let Cassandra believe that she’s fixed everything.

  • Now I Get It

    Well, if it’s my heart, then I just have to take the little starlet on Ferry’s shoulder, dyed platinum for this cover.
    http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/73/41/36/734136724342a08564866dba509e804e.jpg

  • Percy Gryce

    I might have to see The Conjuring now that you mention it.

    But what was scary about The China Syndrome? Jane Fonda’s face?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    What was the VHS? Also, I recently read an article saying that women aren’t as funny and I think it stated that there may be no such advantage for them to try to be funny [men can woo women with comedy].

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    I like their site. They range from mildly amusing to laugh out loud funny. I like how they take the piss out of any movie [ones they love and ones they hate] with their satirical abridged scripts. Of course, the quality of each writer varies, but you may find one with a similar sense of humour as you. I would recommend it. 🙂

    Yeah, with Disqus, all I could do was sit here and shake my fist… with my pants down.

    Wait, what?

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    DiCpario would never do such a thing! Unless that idea of him being innocent was planted in my mind… INCEPTITANIC!

  • ident

    And Child’s Play was a precursor to Toy Story because talking dolls.

  • Now I Get It

    Thanks for the report. It will be interesting to see just where this site fits within that larger constellation of site links it provides, and in relation to straight review sites like DVDTalk. Lots to explore, lots to compare.

  • Christopher Kulik

    Aside from the fact it predicted the Three Mile Island disaster only 12 days after the film’s theatrical release, it also prophesized Chernobyl in 1986. Yes, it’s dated, but that’s not the film’s fault. I was having heart palpitations all throughout the third act.

  • Percy Gryce

    You must have missed the director’s commentary where Nolan admits he got the idea for Inception from the Nightmare on Elm Street series and season nine of Dallas.

    Who’s been fuckin’ with my medicine?

  • Meester Smeeth

    Wow, Bryan Ferry has a really cute pussy.

  • Now I Get It

    Yes, which makes what happened next so tragic.

    In an alleyway at dawn, such a shame to me
    She’d been prowling through the night, mrowing for some company
    It was the toms who found her, they got a lot of play
    But ’cause they were dandies, they all got away

    Pritty Kitty Kat, pretty kitty cat, Pritty Kitty Kat

  • Mr.Fister

    still better story than oblivion

  • Meester Smeeth

    IT’S LIKE POETRY! IT RHYMES!

    Yes, I do feel ashamed.

  • Now I Get It

    “IT RHYMES!”

    I know, I’m such a thief! Except I’m shameless!

  • taterboob

    “For the record, when I clicked on “see more,” I jumped.”

    I don’t know what it is, but that image messes with my head. I
    grew up with horror movies. Hell, the Exorcist movie itself doesn’t bother me. There’s just something about that image that gets under my skin. I’m guessing it’s the eyes. It looks like she’s looking directly at you through the screen, and wants to do something unpleasant to you. I started to click on “see more”, saw the forehead where it cuts off, and said “I know what that is. Nope, I’m not clicking it.”

  • Now I Get It

    Yup, I just clicked it and jumped again, but this time with a purpose.

    If you compare that image to this one of Chucky, you see that the two faces have a similar expression, and even shape. In fact, it’s just possible that Chucky was modelled after Regan. But there’s an obvious lifelessness to Chucky, even beyond the fact that he’s made of plastic, I think, that dilutes his malice. Chucky looks like an evil imp, but Regan looks like an imp that genuinely came from hell. Chucky might want you dead, but Regan wants your soul. …Or maybe the whole difference really is plastic vs. flesh.

    There were some pretty lurid flesh effects in a piece of schlock called “Street Trash”, but that story lacked the menace of “The Exorcist”, so, they were just spectacular and not actually frightening.

    So, maybe the difference is the story. I can’t watch “Street Trash” or “Chucky” without thinking they’re kind of stupid, but “The Exorcist” – different story.

    http://www.edwardteabelly.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/chucky.jpg

  • Mynock

    They could’ve cut in the sleeping bag kill from Jason X at least once…

  • dollar store cashier wife

    more like better story then any elder scrolls game ever.

  • Kaden Quinn Smidt

    Somebody make a rap over this.

  • Mr.Fister

    I think using “elder scrolls” and story in the same sentence is bold 😛

  • josef2012

    the preferred nomenclature is hobos.

  • NotRickBerman

    The tree’s performance was less wooden than Tom Cruise.

  • NotRickBerman

    My name is Jack Example.

  • NotRickBerman

    This would make an awesome foundation for a dubstep track.

  • Mr.Fister

    there is no shorter sentence that could sum up the issue more appropriate

  • CBSE 12th Result 2014 Declared
  • trynotbeinganidiotforonce

    Totally. TES Oblivion was so bad I could only play that shit for like 800 hours. Fucking garbage.

  • Yelmic

    I know it’s bad, but this hilarious.

  • Brett Burrett

    STOP RIGHT THERE CRITICAL SCUM!

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