fuck you guys! I just saw melancholia and it was the worst movie experience i have ever had.
I have no problem with depressing (now I get Jay’s sarcasm) movies, but this shit was so fucking boring and offensively stupid I can’t get my head around it. Fuck.
Guy on the left… You totally lost me with the “She’s a wounded animal” comment. Did you miss that she was robbed and beat the guy up and took her stuff back? You want Superwoman? This isn’t a superhero film. It’s like saying “I thought Serpico was run down and weak. He let someone shoot him.”
Just… maybe the comment wasn’t meant that way, but yikes man.
Was ‘Drive’ a movie about a deranged man? How so?
I’m gonna argue with the “Top Director” mention here… um he did Alien 3, Panic Room, Benjamin Button, Zodiac, and The Facebook Movie. Those are TERRIBLE films.
Something tells me that you’ve never actually seen most of those movies but are simply dismissing them based on some hipster backlash against Facebook, Fincher himself, Kristen Stewart or hype.
The opening credits sequence of Panic Room is one of the most creative and economic in film history. The Social Network is a good, if not visually impressive film. Alien 3 is disappointing, was pulled down by a shit script, but had moments of visual brilliance. Benjamin Button and Zodiac were overhyped, but terrible? Righteous Kill is terrible, Cool as Ice is terrible, Valley of the Wolves is fuckin terrible (not to mention sanctimonious and manipulative). Even the worst of Fincher’s movies is simply mediocre, so maybe you should drop the contrarian/internet cool guy routine and calm down on the hyperbole.
Why do you assume “wounded animal” somehow implies she’s weak? Lisbeth Salander is the very definition of a wounded animal that has slipped through society’s cracks. She’s suffered one abuse after another at the hands of family and the state, so she bites every hand that’s offered to her.
Any comment that claims Zodiac is a terrible film should be deleted out of principle & to keep intelligent people from having a heart attack from having to admit the direction the human race is apparently going by realizing people can actually be THAT subjective. there’s nothing funny about claiming Zodiac is terrible the way it’s usually funny to see idiots argue the merits of agruable good films. every other film directed by Fincher, arguable, but Zodiac? Wow, I’m depressed. Fincher is, I agree, not half as good as some argue, but Zodiac says so much about life itself your only cheating yourself fighting against its genius.
What about the immorally shot rape scene?
I think you guys got J.J. Abrams down to a tee
Tom Cruise actually climbed the building for real
Just seen The Girl With The Dragon In Her Cooch tonight. Very, very good. It’s like The Wicker Man meets… other stuff. Hope Fincher comes back for The Girl Who Played With Her Fiery Pussy.
I’ve been thinking of reading the books, actually. I wanna know what happens.
I’d watch the original trilogy but both Sherlock Holmes: A Game Of Shadows and Prometheus have put me off Noomi Rapace and her fucking annoying bastard face forever.
you call yourself critic, yet you use the slang of a teenager who desperately wants to get laid, and is furious all the time. You have to learn that trashing anyone, just like that, (even if they are acclaimed directors, such as Lars von Trier) is childish and self indulging. Not to mention you get offended rather easily. I think you have more offensive issues to deal with than a movie you could have easily stopped (or walk out) when it got boring/stupid. Or did someone else tell you that, and you adopted this opinion after you saw the movie? Probably so..
“I haven’t read a book in 22 years”. That depresses me. Because it’s probably true. You non-readers out there, you just cannot possibly know what you are missing. Books are brain movies that you direct yourself and are, therefore, always AT LEAST pretty good, even if the “script” is just meh.
You changed the titles to put references to the protagonist’s vagina in them. That’s The Joke!
Finally, someone who gets it! Thank you, sir.
I just watched Melancholia last night… I am very impressed with your review of it, I am still trying to digest just what the fuck I watched. All today I’ve spent just thinking about the movie, and was stopped by more than a few of my coworkers so they could ask me if I was “Ok”… And I couldn’t even formulate an appropriate response (“Well, you see, I saw this movie… and it was absolutely fantastic, one of the best I’ve seen in a year or two, but you would absolutely fucking hate it, and it will make you want to kill yourself”).
I think it is safe to say that I’m a new fan of Lars Von Trier, and waiting for “Nymphomaniac” in May with a mix of excitement and dread, I anticipate that the ending of that movie may cause the heart to spontaneously quit as your will to live evaporates!
Thanks Mike and Jay for introducing me to this movie (you should be receiving my therapy bills in the mail any day now, I’m sure you understand).
The opening skit reminds me of the episode of seinfeld when Jerry and Newman would rather let the guy die than give him mouth to mouth xD
Zodiac and Social Network are absolutely brilliant films so goodbye.
They gave too much credit to the director and not enough to the writer. Half the feats they attributed to Fincher were actually the work of Larsson – he’s a competent writer who knows how to write a decent story, and as a result Fincher had excellent material to work with.
Thanks for sponsoring my home town in every video; wearing a NGB shirt as I watch this.
The original title “Men whom hate women” wasn’t good enough for America?
I love her annoying bastard face.
Which rape scene? The movie is full of ’em.
No, I have seen every single David Fincher movie. I love Fight Club and The Game and Seven. Those are fantastic films. Girl w Dragon Tattoo was OK. And I am certainly no contrarian. I own every Kubrick, Gilliam and Coen movie. I am not a hipster or “hater”. I just like good movies. And the fact that Fight Club, the Game and Seven are so good make it inexcusable that his other movies can be so lackluster. But I do admit, if Panic Room was made by some no name director, I might not be so negative about them. But he CAN make great movies, so he doesn’t get the same pass. I put him in the same category as James Cameron. How can the guy that made Terminator and and Aliens and the Abyss also be the guy that made Avatar and Titanic and True Lies?
Ummm.. no they’re not. Social Network was like watching a ticker get higher and higher. Oooo, thousands… ooo millions… oooo BIGGER NUMBER. How climactic. Social Network is for small minded children.
You are going to criticize my intelligence, and then use a “your” in place of “you’re”? Good job buddy.
Watch the swedish movies – she IS superwoman in those.
She is a ninja who is also a hacker who is also super attractive and everyone wants to be her friend while she is completely dismissive to them because she is so cool and though and doesn’t need anyone and also has this really dark secret about her past ….
just typing this makes me shudder
In the book, Lisbeth Salander is absolutely glorified as just being amazingly awesome at everything. It’s completely retarded that she just solves Fermat’s Last Theorem … in her head … while doing something else. That’s like something Dan Brown would come up with. I’m so glad they left that out of the movie.
That was the titled given to English speaking countries. Not just America.
It’s hard to pull off that angle. The angle of “oh, they just made this film to make a whole lot of money,” when you consider that outside the book reading community, “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo,” is rather unknown material. That kind of angle really only works with mainstream comic book movies, or established film series (Pirates of the Caribbean, Fast and the Furious). So, the whole – this is made just to make a lot of money – angle doesn’t work with this film.
Plus, this film did not make a lot of money because it’s not something very mainstream. The film was barely a success at the box office, yet the producers are going ahead with making the sequels anyway. It’s quite weird that a film production company and a filmmaker would only work on something for the sake of making money, when it has already been proven to not be a huge money-maker.
Just as a side note, I’ve seen the Swedish movies…. Fincher’s movie is better than all three of those movies.
Now, let’s wait for the Swedish fans to start with their pathetic, “you can’t read sometimes you ugly American,” bullshit they always do.
The only movies that I kind of liked from Fincher was “Fight Club” and “The Social Network”. Other than that, his films don’t do anything for me.
Bridesmaids was also filmed in Oxnard, California near my house.
Watching this after having watched your reviews for the year, I couldn’t help but laugh when you said “People on the internet will hate all these big movies we are excited about” that you later sort of trash yourselves, haha.
Truth: Hollywood has gotten disappointing.
Actually, the books and movies received quite a lot of buzz.
It’s not so much that you’re a dumb American, but as your last statements show, you’re just a little Fincher fanboy.
If another director did it (one that you don’t masturbate to) you’d be on the same remake hate bandwagon as the rest of us.
I feel bad for you.
RLM, I think you guys forgot about Spielberg’s other films, like Munich, Artificial Intelligence, War of the Worlds, Minority Report and Saving Private Ryan where they are far from being “glowy” and brightly lit.
Mike and Jay are smart guys… I doubt that Jay doesn’t actually read books.
M’kay, I’m not a huge fan of grammatical errors, but if the “your vs. you’re” thing is all you have to fall back on, your (hey, correct usage!) argument never had much ground to stand on in the first place.
It’s weird seeing Mike saying he likes Kirsten Dunst after watching their The Amazing Spider-Man review.
Mike’s comment near the end is so wise and uncomfortably true
“No matter how good a film is, it will always be bad. It will always be hated because it didn’t live up to the incredibly high expectations.”
That didn’t happen to Marvel’s The Avengers (except for 0,1% of the world’s population), but it did happen to The Dark Knight Rises. Shame.
So do you have two accounts then? Because otherwise, I wasn’t talking to you.
It was a wise decision for Jay to trim his facial hair back… Unless it was just for the part in this show
That makes absolutely no sense
Change “weird” to creepy. Then watch their TASM review.
Then you’ll understand.
I didn’t seem like that at all in the Star Trek Into Darkness review. They spent the entire episode why the plot was bad and that it ruined the entire movie. They only spent a few minutes in the beginning talking about everything else.
He thinks a woman is attractive. What’s so creepy about that, aside from silly sex puns?
Why is Jay sucking on an empty bottle?
The Avengers was terrible. Just sayin.
I’m confused, which rape scene are you talking about? In any case, rape was always treated as brutal and disgusting, and unlike something like Kick-Ass 2, it’s treated as something deeply traumatizing and important to the development of the characters. It couldn’t have been handled better.
…. I’m speechless.
Have you guys ever seen Drop Dead Gorgeous? Best movie ever
I’m trying REALLY hard to discern if you’re being sarcastic or not.
The problem with David Fincher you guys should point out, is that sometimes he’s brought in to elevate material that is too normal to be elevate to an odd darkly epic scale and it just falls flat. Example; The Social Network when Zuckerberg finds out the Napster guy got arrested drinking with those girls although he seemed like a fuck up from the beginning, so it’s not surprising, and certain parts of Zodiac, although I love that movie.
Girl w DT made a huge bucket of money. You don’t seem to understand how things work. Movies are only made to make money. Lots of money. Otherwise they wouldn’t get made. SmarterThanYou? Yeah, whatever. Barely a success?? The movie has made over $230million.
Ah, the Fincher discussion. Lemme add my 50 cents and half a dolar with them:
I have never been a part of a discussion where I had to either defend or dimiss Fincher’s briliance, so I will not comment on that, but what will I say that all of his movies I have seen have some sort of a re-watchability with me – sure, you have to have a right setting to see movie like Seven or Game, but rather than having a time to see a movie and chosing them I like to find a time, create the setting and watch them – as pretencious as it sounds, you know what I am talking about.
So yea, his movies were always great for me – they are pleasure no matter how often I have seen them and no matter how well I know the twists in them.
Fight Club is great cult classic for me, especially thanks to the whole “cult phenomenon” of people that actualy got the movie wrong. You know those types – wearing a Tyler t-shirt that 1000000 other people have and you are never quite sure if they do understand the cynicism behind wearing it or they are simple living proof of the fact that the movie got so many things about people right.
I watched Social Network with utterly low expectations and I was pleasently surprised, it was a great movie (but alot of my affections towards it goes with the fact that I am a sucker for Trent Reznor and his music).
Zodiac is the same thing for me as Seven and Game (Seven being definitely best out of them). Its one of those movies that I wanna re-watch so I find some time in my schedule to properly watch it, enjoy it and it is not sort of a film that I quickly throw onto the screen cuz I am just eating or wanting to kill some time.
So genius or not, brilliant director or not, I dont care and possibly cant even judge – but his movies work for me and work for me great.
True, but I’m upset with the “good” and “bad” labels, it’s like seeing the world in black and white. It’s more important for me if the film gets me interested in the story, surprises me, gives me something to think about.
That IS the definition of a good movie. It really goes beyond good actors, beautiful writing, good cinematography… if a movie is able to entertain you, get you inmersed in a world, and keep you interested, it succeeds. Of course, some people are interested only in seeing decent action, hot chicks, fast and unfulfilling storylines… Which is fine, but smart people know better.
crying from laughing at 7:30
That’s because the plot ruined the movie, don’t you think? Everything else was ok.
I have read the book and seen the swedish version of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and I hated the book but found the movie far better. The book directly translated into english is called Men who hate women and was about female abuse and how evil rich men are and how good Communist journalists are.
The character of Mikael Blomkvist seemed to be the erotic extension of the author himself. Getting laid with three women during the books one year story. So the title of the books should have been Men who *bleep* women. The book was boring to read, filled with red herrings and the most detailed and well written part seemed to be the disturbing rape scene, which also says alot if you ask me.
The swedish film removed most of the annoying parts and was great improvement. Perhaps this one is even better. I guess I have to give it a try. Also I find it funny that Stieg Larsson is a flaming communist but this book franchise is big business with his family still fighting over the rights to his posthumous fortune.
Hmm, interesting they assumed that they toned down Lisbeths character from the Swedish films, she is more real in the Swedish and its less hollywood. They turned her into more of a badass for this film. They should watch the original.
the fact you need a book to use your imagination is sad
I jerked off to the rape scene in GWTDT
AAAAAAND… I never said that. In fact, I just imagined you as a fat, hairy, stinking homunculus wearing overalls, giggling with delight and drooling all over yourself as stare at Michael Bay’s latest Transformers movie. Occasionally you take off your 10 pound XXX-butter popcorn feedbag so you can suck on the straw sticking out of your 55-gallon drum of Dr. Pepper. Then you say the only words you’re capable of speaking out loud, your own name: “TUMMY KWAGAH”, before you put your feedbag back on and continue wetting yourself over the pretty robots on the screen.
You see? It’s probably not true, but I imagined it. And it wasn’t even in a book!
Yes, because if you don’t regularly read books the only other possibility is that you drool over Michael Bay films .. . keep talking, your doing a fine job of making yourself look retarded by doing so.
No, no, that wasn’t what I was saying at all. You stated that I needed books in order to use my imagination. I demonstrated my ability to use my imagination WITHOUT a book. I even said that it probably wasn’t true.
The fact that you said you “jerked off to the rape scene in TGWTDT” in an earlier comment, not to mention the tons of racist and misogynistic comments I saw when I glanced at your profile, in no way implies that you’re low-brow and creepy.
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo has an amazing cover by Karen O. A woman that I’d fuck her right in the pussy.
Jay looks like a ferret in this. No offense! <3
Melancholia was visually impressive. But that’s all. It would’ve been better as a painting or a sculpture.
The characters were all shallow, boring, one-dimensional and unlikable, particularly the protagonist (Dunst). But where the movie really falls apart is when it’s revealed Dunst’s character “knows things”. You see, knowledge isn’t something hard won through experience, or arrived at through meticulous reasoning based on actual evidence. No, no, it’s something that a special elite are just born with, like shamans and druids. They just have to sniff some incense and pachouli oil and the secrets of the world are revealed to them.
It wouldn’t bother me as much except I’m noticing this is becoming a major trope in movies lately: the protagonist just has magical intuitive abilities that mere mortals couldn’t grasp. It’s funny, I remember an English teacher of mine complaining about how poorly written the Sherlock Holmes character was, because he could just piece together clues from nothing…but at least there were clues of some kind! At least there was a deductive line of thought that the reader could follow, even it was poorly tied together. Today, the super-intellectual protagonist doesn’t even have need for petty clues and information. They just “know things”. They just bare their tits to the sky, rub their nipples, and the knowledge of the universe pours into them (yes, this is actually a scene in the movie–thankfully it was Kristen Dunst and not Stellan Skarsgård).
Von Trier is a fucking hack.
I really liked Super 8 UNTIL they got to the dumbass ending with the Alien being just a misunderstood good guy. That doesn’t work when the alien just ate a bunch of innocent people.
But, he didn’t eat anyone. Don’t you remember all of the people the kids found when they were searching the alien’s ship for their friend? Yeah, the alien didn’t do anything but kidnap a bunch of people.
I’m on the exact same page as Mike about Kirsten Dunst. I thought I was the only one
“The Hobbit I’m really looking forward to.”
i’m glad jay’s face improved.
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