Half in the Bag: Thor: Ragnarok

November 5, 2017279 Comments

Mike and Jay get quizzed by Mr. Plinkett. They also talk about the new Thor film!

Filed in: Half in the Bag

  • Steven Gibbs

    Jack, Rich, SPIKES!

  • defmore89

    finally you hacks

  • Bert Godding

    You should have waited until the end credits scene to see what happened to Jeff Goldblum

  • defmore89

    is jay replacing mike as mr plinkett!?!??!

  • Mike – this is why I haven’t gone to the theaters since I graduated highschool.

  • Jake Evans

    I empathise so much with Mike’s experience. I completely avoid going to multiplexes and cinemas. They are full of disrespectful fools who use their phones and make noise munching crisps and popcorn.

    I now frequent a one screen independent cinema who play a good mix of new releases (after about a month), classics, live theatre streams and documentaries. Have not had an issue with people talking or making noise.

  • SDG

    I’d like to think that the person Mike was complaining about the whole time from the theatre was actually Jay, he just didn’t have the heart to tell him.

  • Kenchun24

    Haha like the quiz…Thor 3 was a fine “fish out of water” movie…prob the best of the Thor series. Taika was pretty funny as the rock dude, Cate Blanchette was delicious, and just like that first trailer, he seemed to get inspiration from Flash Gordon 1980, He Man Masters of The Universe (with a dash of John Carpenter).

    And since 90% of comedies suck nowadays, I’m fine with Marvel churning out good enough comedies. I was entertained…also kind of cool to see some actual stakes/good guy losses finally in a Marvel flick (at least in the GoTG 2 and Thor 3).

    I was entertained for couple hours…but I’m still gonna go see BR:2049 for the 10th time with Jack Packard.

  • Kenchun24

    Haha like the quiz…Thor 3 was a fine “fish out of water” movie…prob the best of the Thor series. Taika was pretty funny as the rock dude, Cate Blanchette was delicious, and just like that first trailer, he seemed to get inspiration from Flash Gordon 1980, He Man Masters of The Universe (with a dash of John Carpenter).

    And since 90% of comedies suck nowadays, I’m fine with Marvel churning out good enough comedies. I was entertained…also kind of cool to see some actual stakes/good guy losses finally in a Marvel flick (at least in the GoTG 2 and Thor 3).

    I was entertained for couple hours…but I’m still gonna go see BR:2049 for the 10th time with Jack Packard.

  • Kenchun24

    Haha like the quiz…Thor 3 was a fine “fish out of water” movie…prob the best of the Thor series. Taika was pretty funny as the rock dude, Cate Blanchette was delicious, and just like that first trailer, he seemed to get inspiration from Flash Gordon 1980, He Man Masters of The Universe (with a dash of John Carpenter).

    And since 90% of comedies suck nowadays, I’m fine with Marvel churning out good enough comedies. I was entertained…also kind of cool to see some actual stakes/good guy losses finally in a Marvel flick (at least in the GoTG 2 and Thor 3).

    I was entertained for couple hours…but I’m still gonna go see BR:2049 for the 10th time with Jack Packard.

  • Ret Marut

    Hey Jay, remember: 837! Plinket and Linda. Two hacks with one stone.

  • Moist

    Half in the bag? I’d like to get all the way IN the bag with Cate Blanchette.

    [Baker Street sax]

  • kensu

    Their mention of The New Mutants makes me wonder if they’ve seen Legion, and what they’d make of it.

  • Kenchun24

    Damn Mike, not sure what cinema chains you got in Milly-Walk-A, suggest you go to early AM showings for 4 quadrant movies like Thor, and pick aisle seats in the backish area via reserved seating (away from seats already purchased)…or just chalk it up to dementia like Jay said.

  • I bought cheap tickets for today on Thursday after seeing everything was sold out. Me and my woman got our XD rocks off for less than 20 including Fandickgo fee. And the best seats in the entire theatre. 10/10 experience, largely because I said no to my friend who wanted to see it opening night in San Francisco. I’d rather drag my taint through a mile of bifrost than pay money to do that.

  • Moist

    Fake news.

  • Omis

    Not sure why Jay says this movie didn’t undercut the more serious moments with jokes. It seemed like that is all it ever did. I mean the destruction of Asguard is punctuated by a joke.

    Good movie but it will be as forgettable as the other two.

  • Is it so hard to believe a matinee at 1230 on Sunday wasn’t a good experience? Bought 4 days in advance, reserved seats in flawless geometry, showed up late as fuck and made it perfectly thereby skipping all previews. Screen 10/10 Sound 10/10 Audience 10/10 – no kids, no wrinkly cellophane monkeygarbage, no morons saying stupid shit the whole time. Full theater no less. It was sublime. And I say that because I’ve had a couple of shitty moviegoings the past several years, Skyfall – boatloads of little kids way too young for that movie, chattering like jaybirds 3 fucking hours past any reasonable bedtime for a midnight showing. And when I say kids I mean ****ing toddlers watching Javier Bardem rip half his jaw out.
    So don’t even think for a second I don’t identify with Mike, I’ve been there man, I just plan around it because parents and moo cows suck.

  • dirtside

    Maybe you guys should move to a city that doesn’t have shitty movie theaters full of unhygienic assholes.

  • Scott Versteegh

    Mike hasn’t seen Arena? It stars the same people who played Gul Dukat and Quark. Marc Alaimo pretty much plays the exact same character of Gul Dukat in Arena too.

  • The Brosevelt

    Mike, listen to Jay and take your god damn anal fissure medication. You could not recall Cate Blanchett’s name or the movie Gladiator but you can with a random Star Trek Voyager episode? It’s like you’re in the TNG episode Conundrum and cannot remember your own mission….or you have aids from that movie man coughing on you. It’s aids.

    That being said, I agree with your burn it down rant. The only thing that will kill the general success world-wide release movie formula is alacarte pricing. However, we will lose movies like Blade Runner 2,049 running minutes because they will be too costly to make in your described format.

    Also, you gents should get MoviePass.

  • Moist

    What are you even talking about?

  • FightingMongooses

    That’s every city though dawg

  • Andrew Carter

    Had to watch the episode reflected in a mirror, otherwise it made me feel nauseous

  • Strelnikov

    Multiplexes differ in quality as to where you live, and I’m guessing Mike and Jay went to one of those in a galleria mall (because they had to watch Thor: Ragnarok the first week it was out, and “sludgy mall multiplex” was the only joint that had it.) There is something about the shittiness of indoor mall multiplexes that I can’t define; possibly “grindhouse lite.” That said, after the first two weeks are over, they empty out really nice, and I’ve seen films by myself, alone in a mini-theater, midrun.

  • RLMkeepitup

    Mike’s standup (sitdown?) routines and stories felt like the good old episodes of HITB

  • Somebody Else

    I feel like they must go to an especially shitty theater because they’re always complaining about the audience. Because they live in a pocket of stupidity, relative to the larger region of stupidity all around them.

  • Moist

    Bong Recreation Area

    Edit: I been spending a lot of time there recently.
    Edit: Figuratively speaking.
    Edit: I just want to make sure you get the intent of the attempted joke.

    Edit: fuck, I’m high right now.

  • Somebody Else

    Is dementia replacing alcoholism as a reason the show is so half assed?

  • RLMkeepitup

    watch all the marvel films back to back and pick your poison

  • RLMkeepitup

    have they discussed movie pass yet?

  • Moist

    And if you think that’s changing any time soon, think of the lineup they have planned out until long after we’re all dead.

    It was too much to hope they could sustain the amazingness of the trailer for an entire movie.

  • Moist

    I mean, maybe they should have let Sting direct it.

  • Moist

    You know, because of the Tantric sex and extended orgasms?

    Aww, fuck all of you ignorant sonsabitches.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Is Mike placing it in Jay? RLM: Embrace the weirdness.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Marvel… Marvel! I was having such fun with our zombie discussion. Goddamn Marvel.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Yeah, but then Mike forgets to review all those arthouse niche movies he’s talking about. Kinda like Lucas filming his experimental flicks. C’mon you guys!

  • Strelnikov

    I live in that state that borders on the Pacific Ocean and Mexico, so we have movie theaters everywhere, because cinema is one of our export industries. They live in a rustbelt state, so maybe driving to “barf on the hallway floor” multiplex is the closest but crappiest choice in theatergoing. Brad “the Cinema Snob” Jones goes to his local AMC in Illinois to watch the mainstream crap he reviews at midnight in his car with Slaver Brian, Jerrid the Creeper, Slaver Brian’s former wife Sarah, and Brian the (Racist) Neckbeard – sometimes you have no friggin’ choice.

  • Joshua Burns

    Agree Mike, I got villain fatigue four or five Marvel movies ago, now when a Marvel villain appears I lapse into a coma.

    And to think Thanos is coming next…wouldn’t it be lovely if his plot isn’t to wipe out the universe but to compete in American Ninja?

  • Kaingerc

    wow, these guys remember more about the first two films than me, and I actually READ Thor comic books.

  • Shivaun McSheehy

    Yeah, I hate it when people are total thoughtless slobs and digging for gold right there in front of you. Any way here’s my crappy Star Wars theory: I theorize that fifteen years ago, Han hid little Rey underneath the floorboards of the Millennium Falcon while saying, “I’ll come back for you sweetheart.” The Irving Boys then stole the ship. Ducain then stole it from them, who then sold the girl, and the ship, to Unkar Plutt on Jakku. Ducain told Rey that he’d take her back to her family. That’s why, during the flashback, little Rey calls out after Ducain, as he’s flying off, “No! Come back!” Han effectively lost little Rey, out in space, along with the Millennium Falcon. That’s why Rey’s in the exact same place as the ship. It’s not a coincidence! Han spends the next fifteen years, “double checking the Western Reaches” looking for Rey. Han screws over his fellow smugglers outta their money because he’s using that money to try and find Rey. Ren kills Han for committing the crime of losing the girl. A teenage Ben Solo felt Rey’s pain on Jakku, causing him to turn to the dark side. According to Star Wars lore a Jedi can sense when a loved one is in pain. When Ren tells Han that, “His old self was weak and foolish like his father.” He says this because Ren also blamed himself for failing to protect little Rey. (Ben’s little sis.) When Ren reads Rey’s mind, he becomes angry when saying, “You think that Han’s like the father you never had. He would of disappointed you.” Ren means that Han “disappointed” him “as a father” in some way. All the flashbacks and exposition, explaining all of this, will be delivered to the audience by Han Solo, via a bunch of missed, and omitted, conversations that took place during TFA. Like when Maaz tells Han, “Tell me about the girl.” The camera then pans off them. Then later on Leia says, “Han told me about the girl.” But we didn’t HEAR Han tell Leia about the girl did we? And, I think, that Han does recognize Rey. When Rey “bypasses the compressor” Han has a non-plus reaction and runs to talk to Chewy. Rey makes a face like, “Why did he react that way?” You see how eager Han is to talk to Chewy when he says to BB8, “Ball move!” Han just realized that his long lost little girl was right in front of him. He was shitting his pants! I believe that you’ll hear all those, unheard, conversations in episode nine. (More Harrison Ford in Star Wars. Yay!) The original trilogy teased scenarios like Luke killing his own father, to protect his sister, causing him to turn to the dark side, and Leia becoming a Jedi herself. These same scenarios are being played out, and coming to fruition, with Ren and Rey, the next generation. Now it is heavily implied that Rey is Luke’s daughter. I do think that Luke has a deceased wife and a long lost child, I just don’t think that this child is Rey. I believe that it’s actually General Hux. My theory being that; Hux is Luke’s force-less born son in disguise. Luke Junior grew up dying of force envy. After interrogating Poe, Ren tells Hux, “I leave that [the non-force magic] to you.” Luke Junior is visible seen sneering with jealousy at Han Junior. When Snoke and Ren talk of the “awakening” in the force, Hux is seen walking just off frame. (This is suspiciously done, just to show the audience, that Hux DOESN’T have the force.) Snoke had a member of his shadow council “pass off” Luke Junior as Hux Junior to hide his true identity. Hence why Hux Senior just “discovers” his illegitimate son one day. That’s also why “Ginger Hitler” is far too young to be a top military commander. AND that is also WHY is this bad guy a boyishly-handsome, cleft-chinned redhead. Is all this suspicious? Of course! That’s because he’s the biological product of Mara Jade and Luke Skywalker. Little Rey starting at Luke’s Academy must of started this whole mess, and pushed L.J.’s jealousy over the edge. And we all know how the dark side loves Skywalker anger and hated. That’s my theory anyway. Thanks for reading!

  • Brian Levine

    I like your theory because we know that EVERYONE IN THE STAR WARS UNIVERSE IS CONNECTED TO EACH EACH OTHER!

    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go shove Boba Fett back down the Sarlaac Pit.

  • Shivaun McSheehy

    Yah-know… “Thor, Radarok” is my favorite Marvel/Star Wars movie because it’s the perfect blending of the themes: Family AND Teamwork. Any way, here my crappy Star Wars theory: I theorize that fifteen years ago, Han hid little Rey underneath the floorboards of the Millennium Falcon while saying, “I’ll come back for you sweetheart.” The Irving Boys then stole the ship. Ducain then stole it from them, who then sold the girl, and the ship, to Unkar Plutt on Jakku. Ducain told Rey that he’d take her back to her family. That’s why, during the flashback, little Rey calls out after Ducain, as he’s flying off, “No! Come back!” Han effectively lost little Rey, out in space, along with the Millennium Falcon. That’s why Rey’s in the exact same place as the ship. It’s not a coincidence! Han spends the next fifteen years, “double checking the Western Reaches” looking for Rey. Han screws over his fellow smugglers outta their money because he’s using that money to try and find Rey. Ren kills Han for committing the crime of losing the girl. A teenage Ben Solo felt Rey’s pain on Jakku, causing him to turn to the dark side. According to Star Wars lore a Jedi can sense when a loved one is in pain. When Ren tells Han that, “His old self was weak and foolish like his father.” He says this because Ren also blamed himself for failing to protect little Rey. (Ben’s little sis.) When Ren reads Rey’s mind, he becomes angry when saying, “You think that Han’s like the father you never had. He would of disappointed you.” Ren means that Han “disappointed” him “as a father” in some way. All the flashbacks and exposition, explaining all of this, will be delivered to the audience by Han Solo, via a bunch of missed, and omitted, conversations that took place during TFA. Like when Maaz tells Han, “Tell me about the girl.” The camera then pans off them. Then later on Leia says, “Han told me about the girl.” But we didn’t HEAR Han tell Leia about the girl did we? And, I think, that Han does recognize Rey. When Rey “bypasses the compressor” Han has a non-plus reaction and runs to talk to Chewy. Rey makes a face like, “Why did he react that way?” You see how eager Han is to talk to Chewy when he says to BB8, “Ball move!” Han just realized that his long lost little girl was right in front of him. He was shitting his pants! I believe that you’ll hear all those, unheard, conversations in episode nine. (More Harrison Ford in Star Wars. Yay!) The original trilogy teased scenarios like Luke killing his own father, to protect his sister, causing him to turn to the dark side, and Leia becoming a Jedi herself. These same scenarios are being played out, and coming to fruition, with Ren and Rey, the next generation. Now it is heavily implied that Rey is Luke’s daughter. I do think that Luke has a deceased wife and a long lost child, I just don’t think that this child is Rey. I believe that it’s actually General Hux. My theory being that; Hux is Luke’s force-less born son in disguise. Luke Junior grew up dying of force envy. After interrogating Poe, Ren tells Hux, “I leave that [the non-force magic] to you.” Luke Junior is visible seen sneering with jealousy at Han Junior. When Snoke and Ren talk of the “awakening” in the force, Hux is seen walking just off frame. (This is suspiciously done, just to show the audience, that Hux DOESN’T have the force.) Snoke had a member of his shadow council “pass off” Luke Junior as Hux Junior to hide his true identity. Hence why Hux Senior just “discovers” his illegitimate son one day. That’s also why “Ginger Hitler” is far too young to be a top military commander. AND that is also WHY is this bad guy a boyishly-handsome, cleft-chinned redhead. Is all this suspicious? Of course! That’s because he’s the biological product of Mara Jade and Luke Skywalker. Little Rey starting at Luke’s Academy must of started this whole mess, and pushed L.J.’s jealousy over the edge. And we all know how the dark side loves Skywalker anger and hated. That’s my theory anyway. Thanks for reading!

  • Brian Levine

    Wait…Thanos is still coming? Wasn’t that previewed at the end of the first Avengers movie? I’d of thought he’d lost interest by now.

  • Brian Levine

    Wait. How exactly does Seven of Nine beat up on The Dwayne? Her Borgie stuff was removed.

  • Moist

    If you get murdered while in church, do you immediately go to Heaven or do you still get punished for all the pre-marital sex stuff you did? And what if you’re murdered while worshiping in one of those snake handling churches? And what if you’re murdered just instants before the snake would have bit you because your faith wavered?

  • Moist

    Pretty sure they left some of those implants intact.

  • andychrist

    may i suggest the first showing on a sunday morning , works for me , all the knobheads are still too hungover from the night before . never had more than 10 people in on a sunday morning .usually starts about 10,30am , that is if the experience is more important than drinking heavily the night before and waking up with a sore arse and a tenner in your pocket .

  • Wat

  • Because Voyager is lame. I don’t share Mike or others’ half-appreciation of it just because it shares the Star Trek name. The acting is bad, the writing is bad, the special effects are worse than Babylon 5, and I’ve said this before but at least Babylon 5 had fun with their space scenes. My halfway love goes out to Deep Space Nine – which to me was just O-K.

  • Moist

    Just trying to figure out what the rules are.

    Like, what if you’re handling the snake and you totally have faith that your god will protect you from the snake, but then a shooter comes in and you decide that maybe your god won’t protect you from the shooter? And then you’re dead. Then what happens? Heaven or Hell?

  • So if you decided that you wouldn’t be shot it didn’t happen? I’m confused – in this situation are you god or are you a follower of his? Your circumstances are vague at best. I don’t think faith relies on blindly thinking that god will block bullets for you because people get shot all the time and it doesn’t turn their family members atheist. I’m also just confused about why we’re discussing this under a review to Thor Ragnarok. Like I don’t think god’s bottom line in the Bible is “have faith I will protect you or else I won’t”

  • Moist

    Because I worship the Aesir. Duh.

  • Oh. Well – you’d probably have better luck discussing this with Alan Moore, who I hear worships some sort of self-invented snake-god.

  • Moist

    Fuck the Aesir, I’m going to worship Alan Moore now.

  • I totally understand Mike’s superhero movie fatigue but thing is – I was feeling this before even The Avengers. Like big blockbusters with these types of plotpoints have been the standard hollywood releases for a really long time – the 2000s are filthy with them. There was a point I think some years ago directly after high school in which I was not quite the movie buff I am now – and then my laptop broke a couple times. I took that time to acquaint myself with my family’s DVD library – which was fine at first. But eventually I came to realize that every time I watched a big blockbuster film with cool special FX I’d start out thinking “nothing wrong with having a bit of fun turning the ol brain off for awhile – I like some good ol fashion action!” – and then it began to sink in – they are ALL THE SAME. I’m talking story structure and like… pacing. All the shit in the middle is basically just a new disguise for the same old shit.Oh here’s the part where we get this type of character… here’s the part where we get this type of plot point.. here’s the part where we get exactly this level of climactic excitement… here’s the part where etc. etc. etc. They’re fucking boring. And I don’t wanna sound like a hipster but I’m a bit younger than Mike so I don’t know how this didn’t affect him years ago – I haven’t gone to the theater for the better part of a decade. It sucks. It always has. Anyway. I’m kind of over it though? If I decide to watch a blockbuster I know it’s going to be – yep exactly what you’d expect. What more did you expect, Mike? At least Jay goes in knowing “this is going to be a well structured Marvel film and I will accept that and focus on everything surrounding it” – Mike is just starting to sound like a bitter old man – not that I don’t empathize. It really has almost nothing to do with superhero movies – basic action plots have probably been ripping off comic book esque story arcs for years. Now they’ve finally just dropped all pretense. Movies are comic books now. Deal with it. BAD GUY DOES THING. GOOD GUY PREVENTS FURTHER THINGS. The end. Bye.

  • I wanna critique the length but at the same time I think that’s just because it’s an entire page just about Star Wars. I always get confused when people have that much to say about Star wars.

  • RLMkeepitup

    did you just watch Carlin’s it’s bad for ya? if not please do!

  • RLMkeepitup

    weirdness aka the comment web zone

  • It’s part of the RLM cinematic universe now.

  • RLMkeepitup

    action movies all wanted the bigger explosion. if CG is mostly to blame for taking the limits off then jurassic park is probably the turning point, although LOTR def upped the scales

  • That’s a fair analysis too. CG has changed a heckuva lot of things in cinema. CG blood splatters for one, I think we can all agree are just bad. Buy some squibs.

  • Timothy J Greeley

    oh man this is the fuckin funniest HITB in a while. I can’t stop laughing.

  • Moist

    And when are the sexual harassment charges against Goldblum going to start? Or is he so sexy that his advances are all welcome?

  • Moist

    And when are the sexual harassment charges against Goldblum going to start? Or is he so sexy that his advances are all welcome?

  • EJ

    If you read the GQ profile of him from a couple months ago that seems to be the case.

  • EJ

    Do they mention Bong Recreation Area in this video? Because that’s a real place in Wisconsin.

  • EJ

    Yeah it’s because anyone who can afford a 60″+ TV and home theater system doesn’t go to the movies anymore. So the theater audience is just a bunch of oddballs.

  • Moist

    No, they don’t mention it, but I have a direct if limited knowledge of the area and Somebody Else’s “Because they live in a pocket of stupidity, relative to the larger region of stupidity all around them” made my addled mind think immediately of the fabled BRA.

  • If that means no one has ever even thought to turn down his advances, that kind of says something about how suave he is.

  • Moist

    Or maybe in the (purely hypothetical) event that he gets rebuffed he knows to move on. And that nature finds a way by just hitting on all the ladies until it gets results. Like that King of the Hill episode.

  • He seems to be very good natured from what I can tell from interviews, but I’m probably not as good at reading people as I like to think I am. I’m sure he’s probably not a piece of shit and I’ll just run with that.

  • Moist

    Dunno. I kind of think we’re all pieces of shit. I was thinking earlier “who the hell masturbates into a potted plant?”

    And then I thought that I would totally do that. Like, not with someone watching, but that I would do that. And that I’d rather not die without having done that. So I’m off to buy a potted plant.

  • Nah. I don’t accept that. I think I had this criticism of a Star Trek Next Gen episode recently that actually ties in perfectly with what you just said. After Troy gets mindraped by some alien guy – at the end of the episode Picard says something about “the darkness in all of us”. That was a very poor way to end the episode and I’m guessing whoever wrote that wasn’t thinking clearly or just swapped the dialogue in from a different script. There is not – I repeat NOT a “little bit of rape” in all of us. If you think that you should probably be observed very closely by those around you.

  • Moist

    I just said I don’t want to be watched while I’m masturbating into a potted plant.

    At least, not just yet. Let me ease into it instead of diving right into my streaming web service for discerning adult patrons.

  • ikdks

    So don’t read the fucking comments. Jesus christ, not everything is about you.

    People comment for a variety of reasons, they want to feel included, they want to get something off their chest, they want to interact with members of their community. I’m sorry they can’t all live up to the exacting standards of the men who brought us the fart balloon subplot.

    I mean once was fine, twice was excusable but now you’re just being assholes. You know all those nickels and dimes you get from clicks? That’s us. Business 101, don’t shit on your customers.

    I admit, some of these guys are annoying, but they’re your fans. Cut them some slack.

  • ikdks

    No, he just marries them all.

  • ikdks

    I think they just bury you, and you’re dead.

  • ikdks

    Yeah, some of it pokes out of her, like over her eye.

  • Who’s this at then?

  • ikdks

    He also had a hat with boobs on it in Naked Gun 33 1/3.

    He’s not sick is he? His bio ends in 2010.

  • ikdks

    Rich has given this speech twice, now Jay has given it twice. Give it a rest.

    If the worst thing that happens in a comment section is people repeating themselves, you’re doing pretty good. I have been threatened with murder considerable less in this crowd than other comment sections

    I can write, you can write, but not everybody can come up with interesting things to say. But they still want to be involved. They’re still fans. Quit picking on them.

  • What speech? I can’t see what you’re replying to but I’ll say this: I learned to ignore Rich Evans general opinion about things based on what he’s said during Pre-Rec streams and the general personality traits his hardcore fans seem to exhibit. Like a good reference point? Remember how everyone was up in arms about what Rick and Morty fans are supposedly like? (I like the show this isn’t a criticism) Well that’s what Rich Evans fans are like. They champion his cynicism and share his typically American opinion about most things – it’s not worth it I can tell you that much. It’s important I think to remember what these people are and aren’t self-proclaimed experts at, even though Rich Evans hails himself as “the smart, logical one”. Anyway I don’t wanna get involved. Don’t hit me Rich Evans.

  • ikdks

    In one of the plinketto episode Rich went off about commenters repeating the “is this replacing that” bit.

    Ok, fine. It was funny. It was meta in keeping with the nature of the show. No problem. But then two episode later in panel he gives the exact same speech. Now it’s not funny. Now it’s cranky.

    Then, like two or three episodes ago, Jay instructs us, that if we want to make a comment we should read all the other comment first to make sure that we say something original, because that’s what he expects of us. And now in the last minute or so of this one he made another crack about the quality of the comment.

    Don’t get me wrong, i enjoy the show. I’ve gotten some good insights, i’ve gotten some good picks, i like the personalities.

    But guys, you make make poop jokes about Star Wars, get a little perspective.

  • I feel you.

  • I feel you.

  • Dan

    “Internalize!” haha.

    Yeah, if the mass movie arenas die, we might get a world where there’s less incentive to create big budget dumb movies that try to please the lowest common denominator, and more opportunity for smaller movies that scratch specific itches.

    I’d love that because I’m hurtin’ the last X years, I don’t like super hero movies at all, and Hollywood keeps throwing money at them. All this money could have been spend on other crap I might enjoy.

  • ikdks

    Maybe the US has just outgrown the theater. The quality of televisions keeps improving.

    Maybe Hollywood should pander to the foreign market, where people can’t afford nice tv’s and the theater experience is still special.

  • Jonny Edworthy

    I accept that I may be missing something with these Marvel films, but I caught a bit of Thor 1 on TV a while back having never seen it, and it was a bit where Thor and Loki are whacking each other with hammers or whatever on some rainbow bridge in space.

    And I thought, “what the fuck am I watching right now? This is fucking stupid”.

  • EJ

    I didn’t realize it was a whole thing on the internet – I’ve just driven by it a few times. There’s also a Bong Bridge in Wisconsin.

  • EJ

    They used to review art house and indie stuff, and all the commenters were like “waaaaah when are you gonna review [latest big budget action movie product].”

  • EJ

    I dunno if it’s just because I’ve gotten older but there’s something about these Marvel movies, with the partial exception of Deadpool and the GotG movies, where they just seem like I’m watching a product. They’re not even bad, but they’re so flavorless. A while ago I re-watched Armageddon, which is one of the stupidest movies ever made, but even even this piece of Michael Bay schlock had so much more personality than, say, the Avengers.

  • EJ

    CGI blood splatters took over mainly because it’s really easy to dial them up or down when you’re trying to get a particular rating. What I don’t get is why they still look so crappy – it seems like something they would have perfected by now.

  • EJ

    It’d be rad if he turned out to be some random dude just chillin like Mr Neutron in that one episode of Monty Python, and all the hype was comically overblown.

  • I’m not disagreeing, I just saying that it’s been that way for the better part of a decade at the very least. My argument is – even before superhero movies everything was becoming the structural equivalent of one, and so this is nothing new to me. I’m not defending Thor 3 or Marvel at all, it’s just that I’ve been rolling my eyes at the cinema for years. I guess all I’m saying is: so don’t go see it? People here don’t seem to give a shit either. I guess it SOUNDS like I’m getting up in my feelings over Marvel, when I’d be perfectly fine with taking a fat shit on most of the DC movies that came out – but that’s really more because taking the piss out of something REALLY bad is fun – taking the piss out of something mediocre almost always lends itself to dismantling and analyzing the business side of things. Fun for awhile and interesting, but they already did Marvel. I just think he’s being a little dramatic.

  • I’m not disagreeing, I just saying that it’s been that way for the better part of a decade at the very least. My argument is – even before superhero movies everything was becoming the structural equivalent of one, and so this is nothing new to me. I’m not defending Thor 3 or Marvel at all, it’s just that I’ve been rolling my eyes at the cinema for years. I guess all I’m saying is: so don’t go see it? People here don’t seem to give a shit either. I guess it SOUNDS like I’m getting up in my feelings over Marvel, when I’d be perfectly fine with taking a fat shit on most of the DC movies that came out – but that’s really more because taking the piss out of something REALLY bad is fun – taking the piss out of something mediocre almost always lends itself to dismantling and analyzing the business side of things. Fun for awhile and interesting, but they already did Marvel. I just think he’s being a little dramatic.

  • I’m not disagreeing, I just saying that it’s been that way for the better part of a decade at the very least. My argument is – even before superhero movies everything was becoming the structural equivalent of one, and so this is nothing new to me. I’m not defending Thor 3 or Marvel at all, it’s just that I’ve been rolling my eyes at the cinema for years. I guess all I’m saying is: so don’t go see it? People here don’t seem to give a shit either. I guess it SOUNDS like I’m getting up in my feelings over Marvel, when I’d be perfectly fine with taking a fat shit on most of the DC movies that came out – but that’s really more because taking the piss out of something REALLY bad is fun – taking the piss out of something mediocre almost always lends itself to dismantling and analyzing the business side of things. Fun for awhile and interesting, but they already did Marvel. I just think he’s being a little dramatic.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I know, right?

    **goes back to watching “Patch Adams: The Director’s Cut”**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Thor and Loki … IN THE HOUSE!!!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I can only get aroused by Brundlefly.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’m sure the NRA and the Christian Coalition will have sensible answers to those queries.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I worship Mary Tyler Moore. And Ed Asner is one of her co-demonic rulers of the Primetime TV Hell Dimensions. Bow down to her perkiness!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Thor: Ragnarok is no Vampire Assassin.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sting was my favorite character in Dune.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Is it me or did The Wiggles get really dark all of a sudden?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’d like to put my boat into her port, man.

    **crickets**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    He gets eaten by a T-rex.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Honestly, at this point, I have “superhero-fatigue-fatigue” where I’m getting kind of sick of hearing people talking about how sick they are of superhero movies. Mike and Jay say the same things over and over (cookie-cutter plot, Marvel movie #1000, and so on) and it’s about as repetitive as Marvel movies tend to be.
    I think this review would have been much better if Mike actually engaged with the movie rather than just talking about what he expected it to be. I think they may have talked about the actual movie for, like, five minutes and the rest was rants about multiplexes and hypothetical scenes Mike would have liked. I’m sorry that Mike had a shitty theater experience, but this is pretty far from the great work I know he’s capable of.
    I don’t know, I may be bitter because I really enjoyed this movie and I resent Mike’s smug “this-is-for-booger-eaters” tone, but this whole thing felt incredibly half-baked. I’m forever grateful for all the hard work that Redlettermedia puts in, but there was a definite lack of effort in this one.
    Also, yes, the comments suck, but the jokes ABOUT how people are repetitive IS repetitive.

  • Bert Godding

    Clever girl

  • david dallas

    I thought the biggest issue was the tone. It was all over the place. There is a lot of violence…stabbings galore, beheadings etc. yet the movie is constantly making jokes to the point it felt like farce at times.

    I didn’t know what to feel!?!?!

    Surprised tone wasn’t discussed.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I agree they are being a little jerkish and yet I must admit the comments section improved greatly after their rants. I mean that “is X replacing Y” routine was getting borderline obsessive- compulsive…

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I agree they are being a little jerkish and yet I must admit the comments section improved greatly after their rants. I mean that “is X replacing Y” routine was getting borderline obsessive- compulsive…

  • Bleurgh

  • Bleurgh

    Arma-fuckin-geddon? Seriously?

  • fred

    You can make anything on any format if you got the cash. Echoing Mike, leave the small independent theaters to art films etc. and the commercial ones with the vibrating cushions can fuck off.

  • fred

    That’s pretty much the general American audience these days.

  • fred

    I had Marvel fatigue during the second half of Captain America: The First Avenger. Remember that one? What a hit.

  • Niels McAwesome

    They show what happened to Jeff Goldblum after credits. Because they just assume people stay until after the fucking credits. -_-

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I feel as though practically NOTHING was discussed.

  • Spoiled Ants

    I expected Mike to answer the first question with ‘the Klingons’.
    Unsubscribe.

  • Spoiled Ants

    Whuut? We love rants.
    There should be an extra section for that, called “Let off some steam, Bennett!”.

    ok nevermind, someone informed me that already exists and it’s called Reddit.

  • Spoiled Ants

    I had Marvel fatigue during the second half of World War I.
    Good thing we had trenches and sock puppets back then.

  • chris

    That’s pretty much the general American audience these days.

  • andychrist

    is writing a comment about being annoyed with them for commenting on comments replacing liking them for commenting on films ?

  • Moist

    What A Country!
    The Yakov Smirnoff Story

  • ikdks

    No, but if a fox is in the bottle where the tweetle beetls battle with their paddles in a puddle on a noodle-eating poodle. THIS is what they call a tweetle beetle noodle poodle bottles paddled muddled duddled fuddled wuddled.

    Andychrist our game is done, sir. Thank you for a lot of fun, sir.

  • ikdks

    The gimmick is a serial killer reviews star wars. I’m sure there’s a lot of mental illness in the fanbase. They’re still paying customers.

    Ever go to a con? Ever see that crowd? I feel like John Cena by comparison. But it’s not cool to pick on they just cause they’re weird and awkward. They’re still our people.

  • ikdks

    I’d ette her Blanch!

    [self high five]

  • ikdks

    It’s much more entertaining after you see winter soldier. On it’s own it doesn’t successfully engage you in the characters, but once you get to like them in other movies, it’s kind of fun.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I imagine Putin has Yakov Smirnoff on an FSB hit list.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sock puppets? That is a rather on-the-nose description of the Hapsburg rule of Austria-Hungary during the Belle Epoque.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Your confusing Red Letter Media with the American response to mass shootings.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    America has outgrown the theater for the bump stock.
    **slide whistle**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I support a Disqus witch-hunt of those stupid-ass copy bots. Hell, Disqus can go full Mass Extinction against those copy bots and I think we’d all be better off.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    — Harvey Weinstein

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Well … if the opportunity presents itself …

  • Pop Culture Reference

    No more rhyming and I mean it!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I prefer CG blood spatters to the real thing.
    **holds up sign reading GUN CONTROL JOKE**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The rules are:

    1. You do not talk about Fight Club.
    2. You DO NOT talk about Fight Club.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Oh thoooose implants. Not the other ones?

  • JSP

    Thor: Ragnarok is no Vampire Assassin.

  • Thanatos

    What kind of nightmare theaters do these guys go to in Milwaukee? Go on Tuesday, there’s no one there. Don’t buy anything, eat after you get back.

  • To summarize it was just about how I already felt “superhero movie fatigue” before superhero movies were a big thing – it has less to do with superheroes and more to do with cookie cutter action schlock.

  • Thanatos

    Not sure that was a serious moment, since no one cares about Asgard.

  • Thanatos

    It’s probably decent fertilizer.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    My favorite Nightmare Theater in Milwaukee is the one next to the abandoned pet store.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    My favorite Nightmare Theater in Milwaukee is the one next to the abandoned pet store.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Are you quoting Finnegans Wake again?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    When seeing a movie alone, always remember to wear pants.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I suggest a fundraiser where Cypress Hill performs at Bong Recreation Area.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    So are vehicle collisions called “Hits From The Bong … Bridge”?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    What is Jane Foster filled with?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    It was actually Josh. His cinnamon-scented beard oil gave him a severe case of dropsy.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    New Flash: People are dumb idiot heads.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Democracy really is a double-edged sword.

  • Moist

    In the US of A, his story is the story of US All.

  • Mynock

    I don’t get the people who bitch about superhero fatigue. This is the MCU’s 17th movie in like 10 years. That’s what? 35 hours or so of film? People watch nearly that much of their favorite TV shows in just a season or two. And even if you count various superhero projects from all studios, it’s still like 70-80 hours over the last decade. People watch 60+ hours of NCIS shows in just a single season and nobody bats an eye but Thor 3 coming out 4 years after the last one is something to whine about? Whatever…

  • Barney Dunn

    Can’t wait for the next F**k you it’s January.

  • Barney Dunn

    Can’t wait for the next F**k you it’s January.

  • All right, round two, keeping it short this time – people have been asking you guys to review arthouse movies for years. If you want something different, go watch something different. It’s almost like you expect us to expect you to review every superhero movie ever simply out of the sake of consistency. I don’t think the guy that sat next to you watches your show – so maybe your audience isn’t the average braindead movie theater booger zombie? Give it a shot. See where the discussion takes us. On the topic of “repeating comments” – Jay remember how much you loved The Witch? Remember why you saw it? Because everyone told you to see it. I don’t know if you realize this, but the only time you guys take notice of something is when ALL of the comments tell you about it. To reinforce a suggestion makes plenty of sense to me. Not that you’ll read this – I’m sure I’m just shouting into an echo chamber from a soundproof room.

  • All right, round two, keeping it short this time – people have been asking you guys to review arthouse movies for years. If you want something different, go watch something different. It’s almost like you expect us to expect you to review every superhero movie ever simply out of the sake of consistency. I don’t think the guy that sat next to you watches your show – so maybe your audience isn’t the average braindead movie theater booger zombie? Give it a shot. See where the discussion takes us. On the topic of “repeating comments” – Jay remember how much you loved The Witch? Remember why you saw it? Because everyone told you to see it. I don’t know if you realize this, but the only time you guys take notice of something is when ALL of the comments tell you about it. To reinforce a suggestion makes plenty of sense to me. Not that you’ll read this – I’m sure I’m just shouting into an echo chamber from a soundproof room.

  • christian

    I can only get aroused by Brundlefly.

  • Brian Levine

    The fatigue sets in from the plots all being basically the same.

  • Brian Levine

    Does anybody know when the Harvey Universe reboots with Casper, Little Dot and Baby Huey teaming up to defeat Richie Rich’s evil cousin Reggie? I am all in.

  • Gehakt_Sausje

    That’s pretty much the general American audience these days.

  • Somebody Else

    It’s pretty obvious Mike would rather be kneed in the balls while a person coughed in his mouth than go see those movies. Obviously Jay would do that, he watches them all anyways. But there’s a reason their side show is Best of the Worst where they watch stupid, low budget schlock. It’s because Mike wants to watch stupid, low budget schlock. And Jay is the fem.

    P.S. Youtube views bitches!

  • Somebody Else

    I think you’re putting too much stock into what these guys say. Rich is literally dumb, and Jay is just there for sex appeal. They know they’re not cool or important people in real life, their judgments mean nothing. On the contrary, Rich’s whining rants encourage the behavior and cause it to increase exponentially, pissing him off even more, and everybody has fun.

  • Tony

    What are you even talking about?

  • Moist

    In Bladerunner 2049 why was it that

    SPOILER

    K was granted two seconds worth of shower water but outside was nothing but a nonstop deluge of rain and rising sea water?

  • Moist

    It’ll never happen. There aren’t enough loud suits and walrus moustaches to go around.

  • Moist

    “People watch 60+ hours of NCIS shows in just a single season and nobody
    bats an eye but Thor 3 coming out 4 years after the last one AND EVERYONE LOSES THEIR MINDS.”

    fify.

  • Moist

    And why was it that the wealthy industrialist was an amoral megalomaniac (whose mansion was basically a giant cistern full of water) while the small business guy in the junkyard had to rely on exploiting child labor in order to eke out his marginal existence? Does BR2049 exist in a reality where people don’t realize that tax cuts for the wealthy fix everything?

  • They’d probably get by just fine on views just from doing Star Wars once a year. Just look at the difference in the number of comments. It doesn’t matter how hard they rip on it, the Star Wars fans will keep coming back for more.

  • Remember when he punched Agent Smith? And his face came off to reveal he was actually Skeletor? That was exciting.

  • ikdks

    I don’t think Rich is dumb. He’s really good with word play. I wouldn’t be surprised if nonmedy made it into a dictionary some day. I didn’t get coupon shot at first, but if he meant, like, a cheap money shot, that’s pretty good.

    I really like Jay as a personality. It’s important i think, to distinguish between a person and a personality. I don’t know the man, i just know the image, but i think he’s really likeable.

    He and i also share a certain kind of appreciation of film. He seems to have a much broader definition of what is a movie. I think people limit themselves with their own expectations. He just lets a movie be itself, not everybody does that.

    On the other hand, he doesn’t seem to appreciate the visceral experience of film. He doesn’t get the ride. I enjoyed 2012, Jurassic World, ID42. Then i never thought about them again. There’s nothing wrong with that.

    But that’s what Mike’s for, he’s a giant magnetic bottle of id with a nerd mind. Keep the trek coming, buddy! Rock out with your spock out. The world is hollow, dude, and I have touched the motherfucking sky!

    Damnit Wizard, i know you saw Space Mutiny on Mystery Science Theater, you lying son of a bitch! You were chomping at the bit to point out the dead girl was alive. You blurted it out the second she resolved on the screen. You were thinking Brick StakeFace and Dirk Hardpeck the whole movie. Admit it!

    I’m on to you man, i catch every repurposed misty line you drop. Come out Brother! Come out of the closet. I bet you swapped tapes!!!!

    Colin, you can really drop a beat. Jim, i have a series idea i want to pitch to you.

  • Moist

    And Jared Leto’s fish, the one that jumped out of the water just before Leto started having a villainous monologue about hubris, was that just a happy coincidence or did he engineer a fish that would jump at his command specifically to get his villainous monologue started? And if you’re a megalomaniac is “hubristic folly” the best topic for your TED talk?

  • ikdks

    You go the sanchez route and you just don’t think about it. It’s an immersive theater experience.

    Grant Morrison did a comicon, and complained that people choose comic books, fantasy and science fiction, where anything is possible, and then immediately try to tie it down with all sorts of rules.

    And with the best sci fi you have meet it halfway and fill in the blanks. Otherwise it’s just a slog of exposition.

  • Moist

    Maybe I just have to wait for them to release a “final cut” that deletes the shower bit. And adds a voiceover track.

  • RLMkeepitup

    now here’s a comment I didn’t expect -Jay

  • fred

    I like the old flash.

  • Dessicator1

    “I may be bitter because I really enjoyed this movie and I resent Mike’s smug “this-is-for-booger-eaters” tone”

    I’m with you on that one. If they don’t like the movie, fine, but don’t sit there and tell me that I’m stupid because I liked the movie and had a bag of popcorn while I watched. I have a degree in Chemistry boys, I’m smarter than you no matter what movie you watch.

  • Dessicator1

    “I may be bitter because I really enjoyed this movie and I resent Mike’s smug “this-is-for-booger-eaters” tone”

    I’m with you on that one. If they don’t like the movie, fine, but don’t sit there and tell me that I’m stupid because I liked the movie and had a bag of popcorn while I watched. I have a degree in Chemistry boys, I’m smarter than you no matter what movie you watch.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The TED Talks are really a cult. Why else do you think every “talk” sounds like a sales pitch geared towards NPR-listening whitebread egg-heads?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or makes the shower “golden” to reflect the erotic peculiarities of the amoral megalomaniac we have occupying the Oval Office.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    All the loud suits and walrus mustaches have been requisitioned for the Jeeves and Wooster Extended Cinematic Universe reboot.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Oh for fuck’s sake! “Flagged for Impersonation” and blocked. Seriously, fuck off and die.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Mike is slowly evolving into a gelatinous blob like the people in WALL-E.

  • Moist

    Because, like me, Ira Glass is a sex lord.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    We have to endure the Xmas season first.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Well, yes, obviously, but that’s not the issue. My erotic fanfiction about Sarah Vowell and Amy Sedaris is also not the issue.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Superhero fatigue? I recommend Cialis. Although if you experience the Marvel Cinematic Universe for more than four hours, contact your physician.

  • Moist

    He won’t make it that long. He has ass cancer real bad.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The one where he punched Hitler?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Is that what we’re calling Steve Bannon now?

  • jordan

    Or maybe in the (purely hypothetical) event that he gets rebuffed he knows to move on. And that nature finds a way by just hitting on all the ladies until it gets results. Like that King of the Hill episode.

  • andychrist

    miss actually .

  • ikdks

    Wow, if that’s a lars von trier reference, i’m both impressed and terrified.

  • ikdks

    Wow, if that’s a lars von trier reference, i’m both impressed and terrified.

  • Darth Shatner

    Should probably just avoid theaters in the midwest.

  • Figaro Jones

    I kind of get the feeling that Marvel has been wanting to move away from the standard plotlines for a while, but wasn’t sure they were feasible. The fact that GotG, Winter Soldier, and Thor 3 are huge successes for them is probably helping matters, and I imagine that we’ll start to see bigger and bigger departures as time goes on (can’t wait to see if Black Panther really diverges as much as it seems like it’s going to).

  • EJ

    TBQH find that movie really entertaining. There’s something endearing about its total stupidity.

    Don’t ask me to defend it on any grounds of quality though, because that’s impossible.

  • DoobzMcgee

    This movie pumps up my nards for Marvel movies now… although Mike may be right, I fear the next ones coming out aren’t going to top this.

  • RLMkeepitup

    i hope the law of diminishing returns leads to tales from genesis space level cgi

  • RLMkeepitup

    we have to talk about Goodbye Christopher Robin.. a film that touched me in my pantaloons

  • RLMkeepitup

    hollywood is no longer risky only risque

  • EJ

    I don’t know why more sci-fi films don’t go the District 9 or Moon route and start off with a little snippet of in-universe documentary footage. Boom, everything you need to know to understand this world in a couple of minutes, and now we can get to the the story.

  • chris

    Just trying to figure out what the rules are.Like, what if you’re handling the snake and you totally have faith that your god will protect you from the snake, but then a shooter comes in and you decide that maybe your god won’t protect you from the shooter? And then you’re dead. Then what happens? Heaven or Hell?

  • chris

    Just trying to figure out what the rules are.Like, what if you’re handling the snake and you totally have faith that your god will protect you from the snake, but then a shooter comes in and you decide that maybe your god won’t protect you from the shooter? And then you’re dead. Then what happens? Heaven or Hell?

  • chris

    Just trying to figure out what the rules are.Like, what if you’re handling the snake and you totally have faith that your god will protect you from the snake, but then a shooter comes in and you decide that maybe your god won’t protect you from the shooter? And then you’re dead. Then what happens? Heaven or Hell?

  • chris

    Just trying to figure out what the rules are.Like, what if you’re handling the snake and you totally have faith that your god will protect you from the snake, but then a shooter comes in and you decide that maybe your god won’t protect you from the shooter? And then you’re dead. Then what happens? Heaven or Hell?

  • Jake Nunez

    Oh you mean the thing Jay said at the end. Yeah that didn’t bother me much I guess. That’s the way internet comments work everywhere – so you do have a point though.Sorry I thought there was some specifically Disqus related witch-hunt going on. He could just be referring to comments on youtube, as I’ve noted a lot of people seem to infer that is the only place they check anymore. I’m not bothered – he can knock me if he wants I actually need to stop flinging so many paragraphs around these boards. Eventually someone might be able to ballpark what I’m actually like, and I don’t enjoy that idea.

  • growinggnar

    Marvel… Marvel! I was having such fun with our zombie discussion. Goddamn Marvel.

  • Erwan

    In one of the plinketto episode Rich went off about commenters repeating the “is this replacing that” bit.Ok, fine. It was funny. It was meta in keeping with the nature of the show. No problem. But then two episodes later in panel he gives the exact same speech. Now it’s not funny. Now it’s cranky.Then, like two or three episodes ago, Jay instructs us, that if we want to make a comment we should read all the other comment first to make sure that we say something original, because that’s what he expects of us. And now in the last minute or so of this one he made another crack about the quality of the comments.Don’t get me wrong, i enjoy the show. I’ve gotten some good insights, i’ve gotten some good picks, i like the personalities.But guys, you make make poop jokes about Star Wars, get a little perspective.

  • ikdks

    I hate you so much.

  • ikdks

    Maybe works in a reference to the n word.

  • Bleurgh

    Although I enjoyed this movie I think they made it too comedic. Thor was funny because he was self-serious and arrogant and seeing things go wrong for a person like that and them embarrass themselves is naturally funny. I’m pretty sure theres a word for this kind of character, but in this movie Thor seemed too self-aware of his own humour. Thor has no sense of humour, he’s a pretentious self-serious asshole, that’s why he’s funny, not because he makes quips and ironic comments on what’s happening.

  • Bleurgh

    Although I enjoyed this movie I think they made it too comedic. Thor was funny because he was self-serious and arrogant and seeing things go wrong for a person like that and them embarrass themselves is naturally funny. I’m pretty sure theres a word for this kind of character, but in this movie Thor seemed too self-aware of his own humour. Thor has no sense of humour, he’s a pretentious self-serious asshole, that’s why he’s funny, not because he makes quips and ironic comments on what’s happening.

  • Bleurgh

    I’m assuming the shower water was fresh and the rain was polluted.

  • Bleurgh

    Disappointed Raw wasn’t reviewed. Raw is fucking great.

  • Bleurgh

    As non-reviewers we have the luxury of not seeing these films on release week. Always empty on weeks 2 or 3.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Couldn’t have said it better myself!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I couldn’t have said it better!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Yeah you fhacks! Review something outside your comfort area, the fish out of the water feel will make it worthwhile. A review of Big Sick would have been fun. Or Okja. Or Valerian.  Or Victoria and Abdul. God, even Beauty and the Beast would do. Just enough with the superhero movies already! Bloody f#@&g HELL!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Yeah, yeah, fascinating stuff. Now then, has anybody noticed how Valerian was given hell for not delivering at the box office but now that the Exact Same Thing is happening to Blade Runner 2049 nobody is making as much as a peep? What gives?

  • Somebody Else

    Valerian looked stupid and so people wanted to yell at it. Blade Runner seemed earnest so people feel bad for it.

  • Moist

    What were their respective budgets?

  • Spoiled Ants

    People have to keep the tradition alive and wait in the woods for another 5-10 years before declaring the new Blade Runner an overlooked classic, regardless if it’s boring as fuck.

  • Spoiled Ants

    My guess is he didn’t pay enough rent to his landlord Immortan Joe.

  • Moist

    That seems fiscally irresponsible of the LAPD, paying him wages so he can then pay a landlord. Like, just shove your fleshdroids into a jail cell or barracks or something. Robocop had nothing but a chair and some baby food and he got shit done.

  • Moist

    Then the goddamn androids should be engineered to drink the shitty rainwater and piss out filtered water. Did they lose Brita technology in the “Blackout?”

  • Spoiled Ants

    As far as I remember they only watched two ‘medium budgeted’ films like Get Out and Mother(?). The rest is the usual, blockbuster/superhero fare.
    To be fair, I think in general this year wasn’t very exciting in terms of new releases, I kinda went only four times to the movie theatre. And the best thing I watched this year was probably Get Out and Lawrence of Arabia, but that’s all I remember.

    I wish they would watch more low-profile films or even some Netflix films, anything but less Disney-owned franchises. Complaining about the stagnation of the industry but going to the same dried-up well, instead of putting the spotlight on smaller or lesser known films is proof that those hackfrauds suffer from Stockholm syndrome or at least gotten into some heavy cinematic masochism lately.
    Although I’m glad that Mike doesn’t have that thousand-yard-stare anymore when he’s talking about movies. Maybe it’s because there is this new Star Trek series that restored some of his life energy for the next five to seven years.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    We must all learn the importance of being Ernest. In unrelated news, either the curtains go or I do.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    We must all learn the importance of being Ernest. In unrelated news, either the curtains go or I do.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Sounds like a litigious statement to me.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    They really Britta’d it up this time.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    If they chewed on Valerian they would feel less depressed.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Thanos is still coming … in my erotic fanfiction.
    **slide whistle**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The pizza rolls are not what they seem.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Without pockets of stupidity, how will we make American elections work?

  • Yeah I don’t really mean to go in on them or anything, I’m still entertained regardless. Just wouldn’t mind a more focused look at a fresh idea.

  • Moist

    You’re the worst.

  • Moist

    I don’t know that I’d be griping about these minor questions if I’d enjoyed the story more. I mean, I probably would be, but I’m not totally certain.

    Also: Leto is the worst.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Are you ready for Thor: Ragnaroktober?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Democracy is based on the law of diminishing returns. No wait, that’s just the stockholder statements from my Trump Organization portfolio.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    … iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin the morning!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Rick Sanchez?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    He actually constructed Replicants from his used condoms and early “Suicide Squad” drafts.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    FOX News plots are getting pretty stale too. Is there anyone left on earth who really gives a single fuck about Hillary and her damn email server?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    He gets eaten by a dinosaur, but only after he installs a virus on an alien spaceship using a 1990s era laptop.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    What’s all this then?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Mike replaced Joel on the Satellite of Love.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Let’s see, acording to Box Office Mojo:

    Valerian:
    Budget: $177.2 mil / Ww gross: $225 mil
    Blade Runner 2049:
    Budget: $150 mil / Ww gross: $241 mil

    I won’t even go into the ratings or the bad press the first one got. IMO Hollywood has a tendency to pile on the visiting team, and foreign movies which are as entertaining/silly as the local crap get overlooked at best or simply slammed.

  • Spoiled Ants

    I get that, I also wasn’t trying to rant on the guys. I just noticed that this year the ratio of indie vs blockbuster reviews seemed bit unbalanced than usual. But I also forget that Jay is more into arthouse than Mike is, so it’s bound to tend towards more popular movies (probably also because of this sweet YT money). And I know what it’s like to try to convince friends to watch a movie where nothing explodes, not even a head.

  • Spoiled Ants

    I get that, I also wasn’t trying to rant on the guys. I just noticed that this year the ratio of indie vs blockbuster reviews seemed bit unbalanced than usual. But I also forget that Jay is more into arthouse than Mike is, so it’s bound to tend towards more popular movies (probably also because of this sweet YT money). And I know what it’s like to try to convince friends to watch a movie where nothing explodes, not even a head.

  • Moist

    I don’t think Valerian even made it to my edge-of-the-grid town. It seems like each year there’s one movie that gets shit upon by everyone before anyone has even seen it. Like, John Carter wasn’t good (it could have been good, but it seemed as if creative control was handed over to people who… whatever), but nobody was willing to go and see it for fear of being known as the one person who went to see it.

    Or maybe if Valerian had been like a sequel to Fifth Element (which I didn’t really enjoy) it would have gotten more love.

    I’m beginning to suspect that all of my arguments are incoherent shit shows. Like After Earth. Which I don’t regret seeing because that fucking bird sacrificed itself for Willennium Jr. and that one scene might be the sole defining characteristic of this particular alleged universe.

  • EJ

    I dunno if you’re joking but I genuinely do think he was the best part of that movie. He was pretty good in Lock, Stock, and 2 Smoking Barrels as well.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Well, just like you said, I don’t regret having seen it. Other mainstream movies, on the other hand, make me feel disgusted at myself, just like after eating a Big Mac. And if your arguments are incoherent shit shows then call me a shit head because I agree with you!

  • rikkibarnes

    I might be alone here but I would’ve liked this HitB to have been the first with just Jay and Rich. I think Rich might’ve had some cool insight into this movie since he enjoyed comics. I like and value Mike’s ppinions but…the effort was weak in this video. 🙁

  • SamWongBal

    okay guys we get it. you’re sooo much smarter than the average moviegoer. siiiiiiiiigh

  • SamWongBal

    someone should make a movie about how Mike was cursed by a genie to never feel joy again

  • Pop Culture Reference

    What will be forgettable?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Isn’t that called “being a Protestant”?

  • Moist

    Just looked for an RLM review of Valerian. Didn’t find one, but there was an interesting expose about that Annabel Creations fuckery. If the one precluded the other, I think they made the right choice.

  • Moist

    What do you think? Will Putin hand over Snowden as a gesture of goodwill?

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Yeah that was a good one. Well, they still have time for a 2017 wrap-up before F#$k you it’s January…

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Yeah that was a good one. Well, they still have time for a 2017 wrap-up before F#$k you it’s January…

  • Moist

    Man, the depiction of Earth’s destruction at the hands of CGI space bugs was totally botched by the dullards over at Marvel. Surely the people who brought us Suicide Squad and 300 will get it right.

    Unite the league!

  • Moist

    Or how about a movie where he sits next to a sick person in a movie theater and then gets a runny nose? It doesn’t even have to be feature length, it could be 30 minutes long and the runny nose could be made to seem incidental to the surface story wherein he and his wacky companions talk about the decline of contemporary cinema and the death of the communal moviegoing experience.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    The spiky headdress thing looks a tad unwieldy.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’m still waiting for the Kingsman 2 review. (Not really.)

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I recently watched “Lawrence of Arabia” on my smartphone. Worth it!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Aren’t there enough exploding heads in American mass shootings?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Trump would accidentally pardon Snowden, since Snowden represents a confusing conundrum to his knuckle-dragging racist base. The conundrum being: Snowden is an arch-traitor who exposed secret information of American intelligence agencies. On the other hand, he exposed the Deep State for what it is: total surveillance and bureaucratic inefficiency.

    Your move, MAGA-philes.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    NCIS? Is that show still on? Isn’t Mark Harmon like 100 years old or something?

  • Omis

    I forget.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I dunno, people are really, really, REALLY fucking stupid in this country.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    On the other hand, The Lord of the Rings was mostly hobbits singing songs about trees. It’s a great cause for fiction-induced narcolepsy.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That’s because Robocop was set in Detroit.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    And Donald Trump passed a ton of legislation, had high poll numbers, and staff that didn’t collude with Russia?

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