Ben Affleck’s penis.
Filed in: Half in the Bag
Ben Affleck’s penis ?!
Ben Affleck’s penis.
You guys have really been putting out the product lately.
i love you mike make love to me
I don’t get the creep factor with dolls. One reason why Child’s Play always cracked me up.
fuk u RLM, I was going to take a nap
This Gone Girl movie is sounding like The Life of David Gale with Ben Affleck instead of Kevin Spacey.
confirmed for jay
Wait a minute, i thought Ben Affleck doesn’t have a penis.
Ben Affleck’s pen is what? Mightier than a sword?
I can tolerate a lot of things at RLM; Mike finally dying at the hands of Rich, Jack using a keyboard and mouse, Jessi realizing she is an adult and shouldn’t like fart jokes but the one thing I cannot tolerate is Jays chin being naked. Shave it and I’m out, you’ve been warned!
Penis Affleck’s Ben
Affleck’s Penis Ben.
Why doesn’t the fucking progress bar work? I can’t skip ahead or back, What the fuck?
Pen Affleck’s benis.
They kind of missed the entire point of why Amy is the way she is
Because blip suck a bag of horse cocks.
You have to click and hold for a while, a second or two, for the progress bar to skip to your intended time. A simple instant click doesn’t do it.
P.N. Beffleck’s aenis
Ben Affleck’s Pen15
did they, or did the movie fail as an adaptation? i saw the movie last night with a friend who hadn’t read the book and they asked all the same questions as mike and jay, while i thought the movie was enjoyable but my experience was different because i could fill in a lot of the blanks myself having read the book.
Ben’s pen licks a fef.
You guys had the same thoughts I did on Gone Girl. It started as an interesting and well structured thing on media frenzies and the public eye, and then it turns into complete schlock. Not only was it stupid, but, like, what was it about at that point? Marriage? How we put on “personas” to please others? Everything I could think of was too obvious, stupid or non-existent. As for the Amazing Amy thing, I -think- the idea is that being compared to this fictional character messed with her psyche, but that’s really stupid because I don’t think it would turn her into a Men’s Rights Activist’s worst nightmare.
It’s a shame because the murder scene towards the end is one of the best things Fincher has ever filmed.
No, not the beard!!
Oh yeah, that’s a good idea. A couple fucking on a demon book and the mixed fuck juices leaking all over it and activating some kind of magic that teleports a tentacle monster that proceeds to kill and rape everyone and everything.
I’d watch that movie.
Jay threatens to shave his beard and the RLM comment section be like
Excuse me, I am much prettier when I panic.
Here’ my obvious reaction:
RLM nail it when they talk about Zack Snyder or Michael Bay shit and I agree with everything they say but when they talk about a “Boyhood” or a “Gone Girl” I find it a bit awkward because they seem a bit out of their depth trying to fully analyse it and sum it up espicially when it has a director as smart as Fincher so I think sometimes the directors vision is a bit lost on Mike and Jay but hey they didn’t hate it and everyone’s entitled to their opinions. Now for the RLM fan hate wave.
Innocent people are gonna die?
Between this and Dragon Tattoo, Fincher seems to have become the premier director of airport novel adaptations. Also while I’m not sure I’d say the Gone Girl is sexist, it’s going to become massively popular with sexists, in the same way that Fight Club has loads of fans who root for Tyler Durden.
No hate from me. I think it’s just a case of “Different strokes for
different folks.” I loved Boyhood and Gone Girl but they’re not perfect
movies. It’s okay to not like them or still like a movie like Gone Girl a
lot like Jay and Mike did and have some issues with them. It’s just a movie, who cares?
One of my main issues with ‘Gone Girl’ was the dialogue.
I thought it tried too hard to sound clever to the point it felt forced. I kept thinking that no one speaks like that and it distracted me from the start.
nothings really a perfect movie anyway
Clearly it should be “Dollhood”.
Yup! Make that exact comparison to Fight Club myself a few times.
I don’t think it is sexist, Amy isn’t evil because she’s a women (the detective is a woman and she’s the closest thing to ‘the hero’ in the film)i she’s evil because she’s a sociopath but I’m sure lots of idiots will misread the film.
I don’t think that matters though, artists shouldn’t be expected to compromise their vision because it might be misinterpreted.
I’d say Gone Girl’s the same as Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, a lightweight, unexceptional airport novel adaptation that will be nominated for a few Oscars but largely forgotten in five years.
I think what I’m saying is their analysis of “good” films disappoints me because I know they are smart intelligent hilarious guys and I want a more interesting chat about the film while being funny and sometimes espicially with the Boyhood review it just felt like them saying it was shit and then making jokes about it which made me think wow I thought they’d appreciate it more and not just make lazy criticisms at it
So are you guys going to end up on a deserted island? Then you could be rescued by the Coast Guard, but it turns out it’s not really the coast guard it is instead some undercover strippers and Samurai Cop.
Like in a burka?
“It’s so fucking long!”,- Jay Bauman, October 10, 2014.
Strangely, undercover hookers was a thing from “Half in the Bag”. No joke.
Well, it was a joke. But I am not joking now.
Gone Girl is definitely better than Dragon Tattoo for me, Tattoo felt pretty pointless although well done and I did like it but I asked myself why is one of the most exciting directors remaking a Swedish film that came out 2 years before? I have no desire to rewatch it but Gone Girl is a better use of Fincher’s time and a much more entertaining substantial film in its themes. I think there are better projects out there though and for me Social Network is his best film. I think he should make a science fiction film (ignoring Alien 3).
Yeah, but hookers are a whole ‘nother ball game.
If you watch it on blip the problem is not as prevalent.
Something about embedding that throws off the whole program.
It’s always just their opinion, but are you saying Mike and Jay are too dumb to get Gone Girl?
15 pens on an Affleck’s chest!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.
I’m now waiting for a commenter named “Ben Affleck’s Penis” to pop up. Come on, guys, don’t leave me hanging here.
No not too dumb, just I wanted them to talk about it more. Sometimes I think they’re playing up their silly shtick to be entertaining and they don’t reveal all their actual serious opinions, they talked about the crappy Annabelle film more which no one cares about.
Your uncanny valley is out of whack.
By which I’m not saying that you should whack it back into whack. Or whack it into anything or anyone else.
“What’s her name?”
Yeah, Jay, I would like to know too.
“Opinion” ain’t the same as “reasoning”.
I.e. “I don’t like cookies.” vs. “I don’t like cookies because they make me fat.”
Theirs is also somewhat informed.
So it would be closer to: “I don’t like cookies because of all that extra fructose and glucose in sugar messes up my insulin levels, my body’s response to hunger and blood sugar levels, my liver and whatnot, which could lead to obesity and type 2 diabetes.”
Do you not think that if the killer was the wife, and the husband was the plotting sociopath, that you would have the same guarded response? IE: “there are going to be so many sexists who love this movie” or “she isn’t evil because she’s a woman..”
Like; it shouldn’t even be said. Of course women aren’t evil.
But had the tables been turned, and a man was the evil sociopath, I’m sure most people would be quite content to just let the notion of him being evil because he was a man rest in the consciousness of viewers.
Very strange response from people. Seems this movie has pissed off the gender warriors.
Great, you guys blew your entire VFX budget on the ending. Now we’re gonna be stuck with shitty bottle episodes for the rest of the year. I can’t wait for the clip show episode of HitB, in which Mike and Jay look back at all the movies they’ve ever talked about. Literally all the movies. It’ll just be a playlist of every HitB episode ever. Hacks.
In the book by j-gillian flynn.. I caught that little edit you hacks!!
great episode. keep it up, guys.
It’s a proof of a female conspiracy to sap our precious bodily fluids.
The fact that they’ve distributed their secret “men framing” plan in a form of a bestseller novel and a Hollywood movie just proves how far reaching and insidious that conspiracy truly is.
Always hiding in plain sight.
Agreed, loss of essence. I first became aware of it, Icare, during the physical act of love.
Women sense my power and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, but I do deny them my essence.
This episode had me laughing a lot.
And I liked the Terry Gilliam-esque animation at the end to top-off all that Gillian Flynn talk. Genious! …I mean, Geen-ious!
I knew Bra’tac before seeing him in this film Jay.
Mark Geragos maintains Scott Peterson’s innocence, saying he was convicted merely on circumstantial evidence and the perception that he didn’t ‘act right.’
“It’s not hard enough” – Jay Bauman, October 10, 2014, 8:32pm.
who brings the good d?
I had a nightmare about a doll that would make a great horror movie. That said dolls aren’t creepy at all. Mannequins and statues are more creepy because they’re life sized, and mannequins especially because they’re trying to sell me something. Stop trying to sell me things!!! I said stop it!
The collective gay (pronounced “jay”) fanbase will probably want gay to keep the beard but I’m in the minority, gay has to shave it off it’ll be ten times sexier. As a jay (pronounced “gay”) man myself I need to fantasize about making sweet love to gay without the fear of a little tickle on my pickle.
also, jone jirl looks terrible! Why would daredevil kill his wife? Just sounds silly to me.
I would like to see a sequel to the goobers movie
From a (male) sexist point of view he would be an evil sociopath because he was a psycho.
A female psycho “in fabula” on the other hand isn’t just a psycho – she’s a female psycho with an anti-male agenda.
“See? They are all just waiting for us to turn our back and… Gaswagens roaming the streets, bro. I’m tellin ya. They are not as strong as us, but you can drown a man in a bowl of soup. That’s why I eat only from a can. Safe is safe bro. Safe is safe.”
Didn’t you watch the movie? He was framed. By Bullseye.
Undercover stripper is the premise of Katt Shea’s Stripped to Kill, featuring make-up effects by Star Trek: The Next Generation‘s Michael Westmore.
Jay, if you lose your beard, I lose my erection … How is THAT fair?
I miss the movie-reviewing Mr. Plinkett!
Mr. President, we must not allow a mineshaft gap!
I KNEW something was gonna pop in this episode :3 … tis the season
When they say “spoiler filled”, I guess they were talkin’ ’bout the comments section.
In this case the spoiler is rather old.
I know I’m scared of children.
Anything that takes that much time, money, and energy away from you surely is the devil’s work.
Let go of your pickle.
Watch it first and then comment, you boob
Nah, people would have confused it with “Puppetmaster: Dollz in da Hood”, the failed attempt to resurrect the Puppetmaster series by making it what the 60 year producers thought was hip with the kids.
Good episode, I have nothing to add.
Well there’s probably sharks in the water. And the house probably went over them. So….
Eh close enough.
I wanted to create a Gillian account but some bastard has already taken it.
It’s Ben Affleck’s pickle now.
Them special effects… Your Patreon dollars at work, ladies and gentlemen!
A potato is definitely not a perfect movie.
Remember when HitB was just some filler while we all waited for the next Plinkett episode?
Yeah, me neither.
Mike’s bias toward shitty paranormal horror movies is so unapologetic, I love it.
Gone girl was fantastic noir pulp. Trashy but thrilling, and a lot of fun. Don’t read to far into it, just enjoy the ride.
Well, he does make work for idle hands. So I guess it’s his line of business.
Bauman, what kind of stout are you two drinking in this? Or helpful RLM commentor.
Even the premise to that film sounds like trash I wouldn’t consider watching. If I wanted to watch a film about a murderous puppet there are plenty out there.
I guess when all the other movies are so terrible and uninteresting or not in a genre the guys enjoy, having anything come along that is barely ok is something to hang on to.
A little like Prometheus, its a disappointing film but compared to the other movies around it, its an oasis of creative expression, not a masterpiece, just being made when it was made elevates its shitty plot and characters because at least they tried to make something we would enjoy. They failed, but at least they tried and if others see it and decide to try themselves then maybe something good can come of it. But probably not.
Lets face it, prometheus tried to trick its audience, pretending to both be and not be an alien prequel at the same time. An alien film should have a certain tone to it that Prometheus tries to capture, but its lack of certainty about what its meant to be leaves the characters saying and doing non nonsensical things.
Ill be honest at this point, I really have nothing to say about Annabelle. Really, im sure it will be a bog standard horror film just like the guys said, and thats the problem for me, i have nothing to say or be interested in with it, so much so that when im trying to talk about it i rant about Prometheus.
Skip to 15:08 if you want to skip the Goo Gone review. (If Diksuqs will let you)
Que in the potato fanboys inundating you with their vitriol.
Gold star, boys. Can’t wait to see where the high seas send you. Hopefully not Detroit.
As far as Fincher goes, I’m of the exact same mind as Jay about him. His films are technical masterpieces of photography and editing, but their subject matters often very bland and flat. It’s like a Rembrandt painting of a bowl of fruit. That’s not a dig on Fincher – Rembrant’s “Still Life with Apples” is an amazing work that showcases his mastery. But it’s still just a bunch of fruit on a table.
I think “Panic Room” is a great example of that. As far as the setting, story and characters go it’s probably his worst, schlockiest film, but the his stellar filmmaking technique is just as apparent in that film as in all his others. I like watching his stuff, but like Jay I sometimes get a little frustrated, wondering what he might be able to do with more complex and compelling stories. But maybe that’s the contradiction: maybe Fincher is just really good at uplifting mediocre, checkout lane subjects. Like, the flatter and more transparent the subject, the more his technical skill is able to shine through. I think maybe he’s even the kind of grownup artist who realizes that, and purposely seeks out the apples instead of, say, Matisse’s models, because he knows that the best showcase of what he does.
I think we should be supportive and offer different alternatives. I think Jay would look fabulous as a Klingon.
Written by a chick, bro. Even they know it about themselves, just sayin.
I got that Jay was saying Fincher is as talented as P.T Anderson or the Coens but he sometimes chooses inferior vehicles than what he capable of. I’d agree when it comes to Dragon Tattoo which was just a big Why?
It’s gonna be great.
Someday, the RLM budget will be big enough to add in a CGI beard for the Special Edition release of all the old “Half in the Bag” episodes.
And on that day, Real Plinkett will rise from the grave, just as the prophecy foretold.
That ending was amazing. A gif gold mine and funny as shit
It’s pronounced Gungans.
This is my only problem with your comment [that and your scant usage of punctuation].
Diksuqs? I think you mean Blip.
“… I think they’re playing up their silly shtick to be entertaining…” A keen observation.
BABYS, DON’T GO ANYWHERE NEAR GHOSTS!
Hahaha. Oh damn, I think I used up all my punctuation at university. But I’m using some now! .,.,.,.
So it’s like Lynch’s Dune?
The more I see of Ben Affleck, the more I’m losing hope on Batman.
Future future future Jay?
I am going to watch Breaking Bad only because Mike said so (:
The ending can only mean one thing: Redlettermedia is coming to Europe!
Is the forced cleverness as bad as The Fault in Our Stars?
There really should be a suckability chart for this sort of thing.
A true jay loves Gay either way!
Yes, but playing devils advocate I can see why the controversy exists even if I don’t agree with it.
The parallel I draw is that it would be like if a film has a black car-thief who happens to love fried chicken, now that doesn’t mean they’re saying all black people love fried chicken and steal cars but it’s unfortunate that the character fits in with a stereotype people have.
There are people out there who think most women who accuse men of rape are lying and just trying to gain power, those people are idiots but they’re going to use the film as an example of their warped belief.
Audiences needs to recognize the differences between a stereotype and a three dimensional characters that happens to share some characteristics with a stereotype.
Also I am the sort of person who get’s accused of being a “Gender Warrior”, “SJW” or “White Knight”, I am a feminist and I have no problem with this film.
‘alf in the Bag! Fouck Movies!
“Annabelle” looks like a big pile of crap in all the usual ways, but the doll prop’s design is almost unfathomably stupid. It’s like shaving young Picard’s head so he’ll look like Shinzon. It misses completely what’s creepy about dolls in general. It’s their toylike innocence and glassy-eyed stares combined with the the stillness of a corpse. It’s not because they look like fucking Freddy Kruger.
Can’t wait to show my niece and nephew “Poltergeist” for their first time this Halloween. The creepy doll in that one is almost perfect. I though it was kind of a shame when Spielberg resorted to Annabelling it near the end, even if it was one for a few frames. Would have been much better and creepier if he just brought the eyes to life and let them move.
Have they started grading some of their footage with the FilmConvert plugin. It looks really cool and cinematic all of a sudden. I noticed it with the last Best of the Worst too.
Laser pointer cue?
I want one.
Why was Mike so interested in the Scott Peterson case? Were there any ghosts or demons involved in that?
I don’t got no ghosts or goblins.
Fuck, the whole damn thing is spoilers. I may have to come back in a month or two.
Dont read the comments section.
Thanks. I could sense right away that I shouldn’t, so I haven’t.
You sensed wisely young Jedi, but you are not a master yet.
God I wish they would stop using blip so I can rewind to something I missed or something I thought was interesting that they said 🙁
Instead I get to watch about half of it then I try to search and it goes back to the beginning so I just give up and never watch it.
The family Gryce is moving next week–from Gryce Manor to Gryce Castle. So I may not be able to see Goo Gone and probably won’t be able to comment on this spoilerific edition of HITB for some time.
Please excuse my unexcused absence.
that’s what he said-Omitted,every day of the year.
You’re only a master of Bieber, Darth.
I’m going to see Gone Girl again but I never thought Amy’s plan was to kill herself. She talks about it but I always assumed that was crazy rambling, if suicide really was part of her plan she wouldn’t need to skip town and dye her hair, the whole thing would be easier.
I thought the whole point was she was trying to get away with it.
Aerial photos or it ain’t really happenin’.
You mean invasion? This would be a reference to an actual time Europe was invaded, you know, THE BATTLE OF RED CLIFFS!
The effects at the end looks better then the AVGN movie.
Funny thing is I did a search for Gone Girl on tumblr recently and one of the most popular posts was about what Amy did is a win for feminists everywhere.So you have idiots on both sides sadly.
Who do you think he is Barbra Streisand?
Agreed, tried fast-forwarding through the Gone Girl review and end up restarting the video consistently
Of course, I’ve asked the National Geospatial‑Intelligence Agency to re-task a GeoEye satellite for that purpose.
Strangely, though, I have not had a response to my email.
Got to get my rocks off somehow, this fucking suit doesn’t have very sensitive gloves installed. They are mainly the choking the life out of things kind of deal than gently pick up a flower capable. It seemed like the wise choice at the suit manufacturer’s.
what’s interesting to me is that gillian flynn wrote the script so she crippled her own work basically.some pretty important things were cut yet nothing that was left in was improved.
None may enter my rectory.
No, but it involved killing a woman, so he was interested in that.
I’d wish to someday see them making a review as informed and insightful as their review for something like Jack and Jill but for a good movie.
In the next episode the guys meet Bruce the shark and Plinkett is slain by Submariner (Nicholas Cage).
Thank god. I have a very bad cold and these review always cheer me up. I hope this is a good one and Mike isn’t too erratic and depressed.
Right… Cueue? Pardon me, English not my first language is. Yoda I speak.
The ending is pretty funny. However If I was watching this in a room with them my response would be “you guys are so dumb.” hahaha
Stealing omitted’s thunder people.
You need to click on the part you want to go to again after it’s jumped to the start. That usually does the trick.
Ok I lied a bit, what I usually do is mute the audio and let it run and check back when it catches up to what I wanted to see.
Its gonna be great.
Who ya gonna call?
The lyrics of the SOS song, everyone!
Dit-dit-dit dah dah dah dit-dit-dit.
Erratic? Why ever would you say that?
He kind of looks like a doughy, Slavic, Scott Peterson.
My lawyer, then the local post office, then my insurance broker. I have a busy day ahead.
As a concerned viewer and reader, I must say I’m appalled by the artis- anal casualness with which the clergy and sexual bigotry are linked in order to provide cheap laughs. An innocent word like “rectory” should not be used to mock men of god.
Reverend Eric Chan
Problably just another Baguul problem.
Guess I’ll have to stick with watching these videos on the Blip website itself.
When they’re on here the timeline only allows me to navigate within 6 minutes of the whole video, meaning I can’t skip the spoilers for Gone Girl unless I sit around and actually wait for that whole section to end without the ability to go back to anything I missed during their Annabelle review.
“In this case the spoiler is rather old.”
I edited my comment to include this before you replied. You probably didn’t see it because Disqus is a poop poop.
What I’m saying is you owe me an apology.
Sorry for asking for an apology …
It turns out that there is a girl and she’s gone.
This is why we can’t have nice things.
“Eye mist. Eye Nevers Ms.”
I think you brushed over the children’s book Amy character. Real Amy’s identity (the lack of one) was a big issue throughout the movie.
Fuck you Jay! Ghostbusters 2 was great! Even in the commentary you were going oh this is funny, oh this is pretty funny and not until the end were you like this sucked! hack fraud!
Oh good! I was beginning to think me and my girlfriend were the only 2 people who thought GONE GIRL was a stinker.
This episode seemed like the most fun Mike & Jay have had in a Half in the Bag for quite a while. Great episode and good discussions! Can’t wait to see where this house on the water plot goes.
That would have made more sense, I thought the same thing, but it after the movie when discussing it, it was pointed out that it WAS her plan to kill herself and then she changed her mind. It’s a dumb plan.
A distant cousin of mine built a small cabin on pontoons in a lake. I’m not sure how that plot got resolved.
There’s a movie, also by James Wan, called Dead Silence about evil possessed ventriloquist dolls, every doll looks like Annabelle. So stupid.
I like to think we are paying hommage to him. I’m sure it wasn’t just me that thought of him when i heard Jay say those things.
Would you like to come up here and hold my pickle to satisfy this weird man?
*it hanging here.
That seems like a lot of work, just give him this.
Looks like the government bugged Plinkett’s home. There was something that looked a mic taped behind the cabinet.
I blame Night Gallery for starting the trend.
That’s not nearly enough flying gables, Gryce. A true gentleman would settle for no less than forty-seven flying gables on his abode.
Those effects at the end were absolutely awful. Loved it.
When’s the next “Taco reads Redelem comments out loud”, you hack?
Yeah, good call. Dolls like that wind up being boring or comical instead of creepy. It’s the “Uncanny Valley” theory in action.
😀 I can’t upvote you enough!
I’ll make another when Space Cop is released.
So right aroooooooounnnnd never.
Ben Affeleck is aptly named…cause he always looks baffl(eck)ed.
Just click “Share”, click “copy link”, paste the link into a new window and watch the show directly on Blip. Blip only seems to have that rewind/fast forward issue when it’s embedded in another site’s page.
it’s all ketamine.
This cliff is so fucking long!
Suicide seemed like it was her intent at one point,but then she changed her mind when she was assured he would be convicted and sentenced to death. They made a big point of her determining a date for his sentencing, and then she pulls all her little “I’m gonna kill myself” posties off her calendar.
It seemed the writer was cognizant for a minute of the fact that you can’t really convict someone of murder and give them the death penalty without a dead body, and then she changed her mind and said, “Oh, fyuck it. Why would such a brilliant, empowered woman hurt her own vagina?” It was that kind of thing. Made up as it went along.
That place looks haunted as fyuck.
Ostentatious, too, you One-Percenter. The devil’s gonna eat your baby’s soul there.
This. One hundred times this.
I didn’t see Ben Affleck’s penis. Not that I was looking for it, particularly, but you guys made such a big deal of it. I’m assuming there’s like a fraction of a second of side-cock during the shower sequence? Is that it?
Clicking the ‘blip’ logo in the bottom right corner opened up a new tab with the video in it.
I’m watching it there. As long as it’s full screen I can just pretend I’m still on the RLM webzone. 🙂
Before there was ANNABELLE…Before there was “Chucky” even…There was “Fats,” Anthony Hopkins’ sinister ventriloquist’s dummy in MAGIC. Am I the only person who really likes that movie? It’s got Ann-Margret’s naked breasts, and you can even see them clearly, unlike a certain much-talked about penis in GOO GONE.
Eh. Ben Affleck is likely to be the only good thing in that movie.
Is Gone Grandpa the sequel to Bad Grandpa?
He said he was gonna shave off the beard. Future Jay will be clean shaven. And ripped like a mudderfyucker.
Magic is a great flick, but it’s not actually a “possessed doll” story. Corky is nuts, and just imagines the doll is doing the killing as a way to distance himself from it.
Great psycho story, though.
Blip will not let you. That’s the whole point of all our bitching and moaning.
Is Goo Grandpa the prequel to Prometheus?
Looking forward to the water-filled Plinkett house set.
Yeah, I figured this trick out too a while back when the bar control got funky. It’s not a big deal, and if Blip broadcasts puts a few extra pesos in RLM’s pocket (which I’m pretty sure they do) then I’m fine with it.
The Prometheus crew probably could have used a few cans of GOO GONE, preferably extra strength.
But that was the point, see? All the truly dumb dialogue at the start is from her diary. Which is a lie. It’s a clue that what you’re watching is not the truth.
I’m clumsily saying, I think that horrendous fakey dialogue at the beginning was intended, and you were supposed to get a laugh later when you realized it was all on purpose.
As opposed to all the bullshit they’re always slobbering in a Nolan movie which nobody says either but is supposed to work as some kind of up-the-ass philosophy.
Can a chick be misogynist?
Can a man be a dick?
Can a black man be a racist?
Wait? Women aren’t evil?
You’ve met women right?
Mike’s street light analogy is a sign of the first stage of fork in the brain.
Pretty soon he’ll start recommending films like X-Men Origins: Wolverine.
Oh, wait …
Even though Blip has it’s obvious flaws, for some reason I prefer my RLM experience on via Blip rather than YouTube. It could be some sort of masochistic thing or just that it’s more reliable to watch the episodes on Blip all the way through without having to wait for them to stop to load on my potaternet.
Annabelle was all that and a bag of potato chips.
The Old Man Plinkett and the Lake Michigan
It’s funny, Daniel, but I tend to agree with them on everything except Marvel movies (which are anti-cinematic, formulaic pieces of lowest-common-denominator logo-marketing, every bit as deplorable as easy-target Bay, Snyder, Abrams’ stuff). And, I even tend to agree with their specific criticisms. This surprises me since they are such unapologetic fans of bad film-making, and I have no patience with that.
In other words, I don’t think they missed anything about GONE GIRL. Well-made, entertaining, with a crap ending that nearly ruins the whole thing. They weren’t “out of their depth” at all.
I’m babbling, sorry. I’m a little drunk, celebrating Percy’s movie into Wayne Manor.
Well, I never saw his version of DRAGON’S TATTOO. I thought this one was a return to his FIGHT CLUB style of just taking a piss.
I’ll admit I didn’t like FIGHT CLUB much at all.
But, are you saying a potato is everything, or are we supposed to infer a list of all the other nothings, of which a potato is one?
You mean she’s not just a complete fyucking whackjob?
She has her reasons ?
don’t think it was a crap ending, worked effectively for me, if people need a shock moment ending ala Seven then fine but I liked how it concluded, felt typically gloomy and Fincher like.
I read that in the voice of Irate Gamer, which is what I think you were going for.
This ‘review’ is awful.
The latter, in that I chose a potato from a list of ‘things’ since he said ‘no thing is really a perfect movie’.
Unless he meant the abstract idea of ‘nothing’ is a perfect movie.
I’m lost, now.
I like Irate Gamer the same way I like bleach in my morning drink…
OH MAI GAAAWD! This is getting ridicul…er.
Just the way I like it.
By the way, thank you for the inclusion of two of my relatives, RLM.
I like the Irate Gamer the same way I like street lights.
A street light fell over and killed my father.
The Dumb and Dumberer prequel will be called Dumb and Dumbererer.
da endin din hav anuf a’sploshuns
it neded mor a’spolshuns
Your father wasn’t cool about fire street light safety
You are correct, I think.
However, I prefer to think of the whole thing a little more ambiguously. I could say the doll is distancing himself using Corky to do the killings. (I’ll admit I’m wrong, but ambiguity is my favorite thing.) Having re-watched it just two nights ago, I kept my eyes peeled, and I actually think I saw two very quick moments that don’t make the “Fats is a supernatural thing” totally laughable. There is one instance of Fats’ eyes moving while Corky is across the cabin. There is also a sequence where Fats’ expression (his carved, therefore permanent facial characteristics) seemed different, as if a different dummy’s head was put in place for just that bit.
Then there’s the stinger. You could say Ann-Margret is just trying Fats’ voice as a joke, and I’d say there’s no real evidence to support saying otherwise. But, if I wanna, I could say she’s taking on a bit of Fats’ personality, since if it were supernatural, it’d have to go somewhere now that Corky’s corked. The evidence to support that interpretation is, likewise and ditto.
I wish Attenborough had let the dummy’s eyes roll closed just a second after Corky’s did.
Eitherwise, I’m fairly certain a movie about a potato would be an example of something imperfect, while a perfectly seasoned potato chip is a snack I enjoy, which is not “nothing.”
From what I gather, Gone Girl is an Men’s Rights Advocate propaganda nightmare about how women are all scheming, rape-faking harridans. Can the commentariat confirm or deny this rumor?
Too soon. 🙁
fuck off whit spoiler warning shit. Like we ever go to cinema to see any of these. Like I would ever pay 15$ to see something of creator of benjamin button. Torrents ftw.
Meesa motha-fuckin’ hopes so.
Why is she in a rush to go upstairs? There’s some deeper, darker underlying themes in this movie.
A cliffhanger ending that couldn’t even hang on to the fucking cliff? The hackfraudery is breathtaking.
Obviously, will need a sequel, three prequels and a reboot to know for sure. Dwayne The Rock Johnson can play Corky and Shia LaBoof can play Fats. Ann Margaret can be done as a CGI thing.
Holy crap at the amazing special fx in this episode. The RLM crew are well on their way to becoming the next ILM!
I’m waiting for the Tyler Perry black remake of Annabelle, “Annaballer”. In all seriousness though, I cannot find that movie scary after having seen Marlon Wayans: “A Haunted House 2”, now that’s got one scary bitch of a doll in it.
I found it a little offputting, when the actors in Annabelle couldn´t help but giggle while saying their lines.
You gotta wonder..were those the only takes they had? Was the script THAT silly?
These guys look like they have a blast with their video company. Follow your dreams! I have n’t yet!
Oh man, it doesn’t happen often but you guys got it SO wrong about Gone Girl.
You’re literally complaining that it DOESN’T follow obvious, established tropes.
Why would the Casino even look at the tapes if no crime was committed that night? No one was looking for either of them that far away. That’s your ONLY genuine nitpick and you still give it this much of a slating?
Then at the end you moan again that it doesn’t follow formula. What kind of argument is that? The satire is subtle and doesn’t need to slap you round the face to get its point across. The film is obviously anti-media from the moment the Fox News rip-off begins.
“The satire wasn’t obvious enough for me”?
Fucking hell guys.
Can I handle my biz? Yes I can.
“…I did a search on tumblr recently when my brain medicine, which prevents me from searching tumblr, wore off.”
Is how you meant to end that sentence right?
It’s like getting punched in the gut by a good friend.
>You see Ben Affleck’s penis
>Ben Affleck is Batman
Don’t shave Jay! #BeardGate
Remember the old blip? You know the one that worked?
RLM is the reason the interwebzone exists!
Yeah agree, Gone Girl is pretty fantastic.
I love RLM but sometimes it really does feel like they’re just being nitpicky assholes for the sake of not having the same opinions as everyone else.
It’s a really good movie. Bitch be cray though.
I tried to skip past the Gone Girl spoilers but Blip had other plans. Forced to mute the video until they start talking about Annabelle. Thanks Blip!
Sorry, if I am late to comment I had a day off but I didn’t waste my time on this webzone. The girlfriend and I watched Dracula: A Hellsing Fanfic, she didn’t want to watch Gone Girl because she hates nudity in moopies, so I’ll see it later. So yes I actually watched Dracula: A Hellsing Fanfic and it is the most predictable movie I have seen this year. Officially now I am sick to death of origin stories, yes Dracula is basically a superhero in this. The only good origin I have seen for a superhero is Arrow, in which most of it is in flash backs. Seriously fuck you, Hollywood. The Flash pilot sucked and your new Dracula movie sucked because we knew what was going to happen. That’s the worse part is that because the main character turns into Dracula and Dracula is in the damn title we know that he will drink human blood and turn into Dracula. The acting wasn’t bad, the costumes looked great, some of the cinematography is nice….and that’s all the good I can come up with. The visual effects weren’t bad in the sense that they weren’t render well they were fucking terrible because of the damn concept. He turns into bats. It’s just lame. And to piss off Mark Bisone Caligula is a vampire. Charles Dance knows this movie sucks but he’s trying his best to make him the best part and he is. Towards the end as the Castlevania like action scenes are going on I just wanted it to end.
Fuck this movie. And the worse part is is that Universal wants this to be like Iron Man. That’s right! They want a cinematic universe! Okay that’s fine but can you make sure your damn movie is any good?! I cannot say it enough DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE! IT WILL HURT YOUR BRAIN!
So did everyone die?
Jay, you are never going to be a lumberjack. Shave that patchy ass beard.
Oh, and fuck Blip.
That Ohio accent, man. I don’t know why but it makes him even sound dumberer
Are you moving next to the Waynes, Percy?
It must have featured on Paranormal Cops
I had one last week. It’s pretty common
I saw Affleck’s penis, and it was majestic.
Jay and Mike are my boos (or is it bae now?) but that Annabelle review was painful..Didn’t seem they had shit to say about it and just droned on for the last five minutes about nothing.
I WANNA TALK ABOUT HOW AWESOME BABYHOOD IS!!!!
The Warrens are con artists. They are fucking hacks….
I feel like I’m living in crazy-land here – Gone Girl was just “not a movie” terrible. I was hoping you’d have some insight into the technical problems – e.g. Why did half the regular dialog sound like it was dubbed over the actors? Was there a reason it couldn’t be mic’d properly?
Are you dead on last episode?
Also the reason Amy does not kill her self right away is made clear when she looks through her calendar. She was putting it off, and then ultimately decided against it.
The funniest parts of RLM videos is when you have no clue what’s going or what they’re saying. That street light analogy was one of those moments.
During the shower scene i turned to my friend to say “batfleck’s batass” and I missed batfleck’s batpenis
and im really confused about how i feel about that
I almost went out to see Gone Girl this evening, but stayed home and watched this instead, so now I don’t need to watch the movie anymore. Everybody knows the creepy doll movie was going to suck.
He’s like a Ken doll down there.
I think Jay could pull off a John Waters pencil stache without looking too creepy.
That is the sound of a thousand terrible things headed this way.
But how do you put chalk on it?
Jamie Fox’s Nuts
The backwards morse code is sending satanic messages.
They’re not evil, they’re just crazy, which is evil but can’t help it. (j/k, but it sucks I have to put j/k to not be misconstrued.)
Ahh. How meta.
Sometimes the theater you are in have sound problems that do not spread by magic/science to other theaters around the world. Yes that was slightly sarcastic, but I have to tell you here in South Africa the sound was great, so maybe the problem was with you local theater’s sound system or copy of the movie.
Wait, they’re trying to pull off a Marvel thing? Was there a post credits scene where Doctor Frankenstein tried to recruit him for the Monster Squad?
“A fayn ah eechs-min”.
Also, I know the claws are notorious for looking so fake in this…but JESUS, 1:26.
So you’re saying that because your gal wasn’t keen on seeing Ben’s fleck, you had to settle for Tywin Lannister giving Bard a hicky?
Nope, there isn’t. However this a post credit scene with a recast Laurel and Hardy.
oooh myy goood
I didn’t know who was involved in the nude scenes I just said there are sex scenes with graphic nudity and she said no. I think right now she wishes she saw Batman’s cock. What woman wouldn’t want to see it? That lucky bastard has had Catwoman, Batgirl, pre-lesbian Batwoman, Black Canary, Talia al Ghul, Harely Quinn, Vicki Vale, Rich Evans, Huntress, and Wonder Woman in bed with him.
You should ask Kevin Smith. He saw Batman naked way before Gone Girl!
What was the black Goo Gone?
All right, so I skipped the Goo Girl discussion, and watched the rest and have the succeeding comments, which follow these prefatory remarks:
(1) Demons don’t possess objects (or places). Rather they infest them.
(2) We all know that Plinkett actually ran a hardware store, so I just couldn’t suspend my disbelief about his nut ignorance.
(3) Why wasn’t Terry Gilliam credited for the animation in the final scene?
It may seem like I am complaining about this wonderful free content, but I really am complaining about it.
“Ben Affleck’s penis.” Thanks for that horrifying image you fucking frauds!
Fincher for me can be divided. I love Zodiac, Se7en, Girl With The Dragon Tattoo and The Game. And then there is The Social Network, Fight Club, Panic Room, and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button’s Title Which Is Too Damn Long. While I like them there are not up to par with his other films. Yes I don’t like Fight Club as much as everyone else, Fincher has done better.
Spoilers, but the last scene caused me to have a flashback to the Johnstown flood of 1889. Which I lived through, by the way.
…but are they also frauds?
Did they also work at VCR repair shop?
I lost it after the Annabelle review when Rich/Plinkett dropped his load/nuts.
was the VCR haunted, possessed or simply broken?
Did the VCR belong to an old lady that would eventually take over the world?
This was the only good thing about that fucking movie. Bob Saget can be Bob Saget because Bob Saget is Bob Saget when he is Bob Saget.
Two words for you: Dragon’s Milk
The Warrens were truly the Lightning Fast VCR Repair of paranormal investigators.
Yup. i watch it on Blip now, and no trouble. Problem solved.
Didn’t think of that, thanks. But I just go straight to the Blip site and that works.
Gone Girl 2: Bitches Leave
not reasons so much as a bit of an explanation. The book goes into great detail about her upbringing: Her parents are psychologists who exploit her childhood for the Amazing Amy books.
it’s touched on in the movie (although I don’t recall any mention of her parents profession) but in the book it gives you a bit more sympathy for Amy’s character… It leads you to believe that she was more of a creation of her fucked up childhood than just plain crazy.
fuck it i was at work and missed it!
So fun watching Mike struggle with his own hypocrisy as Jay smirks disapprovingly.
That’s gonna be great
AMURKA,INGLAND,STRALIA,CANEDA-EH and middle earth….. have how many eyes?
hey your old want a liver? i got heaps of them….
Only for his matinee.
you loved it!
i hate my brain! it needs to suffer!
posting cat pics never!!!!!
*Looks at account name*
Next you’ll tell me that blue light in the hole in the side of the house wasn’t the sky!
Just because something doesn’t follow a proven formula doesn’t mean it’s good.
“I liked it the way I like street lights” is something I’m going to try to work into a conversation some time today.
I can’t watch it. So I just listened.
I saw she had that date planned, I assumed that was more metaphorical, that was the date Nick would be convicted of her murder and she’d legally be declared “dead” but because of the events of the film it kept getting pushed back.
I’ve not read the book, so I don’t know if there’s more information in there but I think that shouldn’t affect the interpretation of the film, it is a stand-alone piece of entertainment after all.
I don’t mind the fact it felt made up as it went along, it kept it engrossing and gave it a sort of surreal feeling like something from David Lynch (Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet even Mulholland Dr.).
I think a lot of that comes down to the strength of David Fincher as a director; he took something that could have been a flaw of the book and turned it into an asset.
Each act of the film is practically a new genre, it starts off as a straight detective story, then becomes about media perception, and the it ends up as a surreal horror satirizing married life .
Overall I would call it a dark comedy, the theater I was in laughed a lot and because it was funny I’m willing to forgive some of the more ridicules twists.
Maybe. She’s the definition of an unreliable narrator so we can never be completely sure of her plan. Even if it was dumb that doesn’t matter, Fargo was a film about criminals with a dumb plan and that’s excellent.
I don’t think enough people talk about how Gone Girl is a dark comedy, the theater I was in laughed a lot, I thought it was funnier than most comedy films I’ve seen recently.
And because of it’s dark comedy / satirical nature I’m willing to forgive some of the “unrealistic” moments, it’s clearly not a film interested in realism, it’s interested in evoking a feeling, twisting your expectations and providing a commentary on American news, the different faces of people and marriage.
Mike said he didn’t think the fact that Amy was a children’s character mattered, I thought it was pivotal to that theme, her parrents already made her into a “perfect” character (which she complained about to Nick) but she does that herself, changing into the perfect person for who’s she’s with.
And to bring her down Nick has to defeat her at her own game, turning himself into the person the news media want him to be, at the end of the film they both deserve each other (except for the fact she’s a murderer).
None after i run around with a pointy stick!
I like to live on the edge.
I thought you said “hacking frauds” which i thought was a new insult you had come up with. Now im just wondering what a hacking fraud is.
I’ve heard the opposite, that the film is a huge improvement on the book.
Having not read it I can’t say for sure but I didn’t think there were any “plotholes” in the film, everything that wasn’t spelled out wasn’t vitally important and I think more exposition would have hurt the film.
I have another analogy for him to use:
Its like a can of soup. you want it when you feel ill.
Your fucking welcome mike, just saying.
Everyone always dies.
Yea, I think they went in expecting it to be technically solid but narrative lacking because it’s another Fincher adaptation of an airport novel and as such missed out on a lot of the themes.
Narratively the film is a bit of a mess but you could say the same about Fight Club or Blue Velvet, they work best if you accept the surreal elements instead of complaining they’re “unrealistic”.
I personally thought there was enough explanation for why Amy is the way she is, they dismissed the “Amazing Amy” books as unnecessary, when they’re an important part of who she is and what the second act of the film is about.
Amy becomes the person those around her want her to be, to defeat her Nick has to beat her at her own game, going on the news she an becoming the person they want him to be.
At the end of the film they’re both stuck lying to everyone to maintain this persona which I think is a great punchline.
Yea, I’m not as angry as you about it but I think they went in with an assumption of what it would be because it’s a Fincher film based on an airport novel.
It’s a surreal, dark comedy, they dismissed the satirical elements and they overlooked how the “Amazing Amy” books worked thematically.
I accept they’re not going to get it right every time, it is there opinion after all but this is probably the most I’ve disagreed with them and I liked Boyhood (I just thought there criticisms there were more valid).
Mike and Jay didn’t think it was a stinker. They liked it and recommended it, they just had a few quibbles with the plot, which I personally don’t think hold up when you accept the film is a dark comedy / satire,.
Yea, it’s probably easier for them to get into in depth analysis of films out on DVD/Bluray.
Where they can re-watch them and pick out specific clips to make a point.
The format of Half in the Bag seems to be:
– Introduce film 1
– Each give their brief opinion on it
– Crack jokes for 5 minutes
– Introduce film 2
Sometimes I wonder how long ago they saw these films before taping the episode and whether they really were half in the bag (intoxicated) because they don’t often get into specifics.
I have come to accept it for what it is, it’s not going to go into as much detail as the Plinkett reviews or Best of the Worst.
I think was Daniel is saying, is they don’t really go into that much detail.
What they actually say is “I don’t like cookies, here’s a short list of things I think are plotholes” then they spend 5 minutes making jokes about cookies.
I don’t mind that format at all but it’s not as analytical as some of their other shows.
It seems like they go into more detail when they’re reviewing bad films than when they’re reviewing something they like.
I think they have the “Zero Punctuation” problem, where their audience expect them to be negative, so if they haven’t got something bad to say they spend their time cracking jokes.
They seem way more energetic and excited when they’re ripping apart a bad film than when they’ve seen something they recommend.
Was I meant to laugh at that jump scare?
Yes your first try will take you somewhere else completely but your second try will take you to where you wanted to go originally on your first try.
It’s a great system! 🙂
Good luck with that. 🙂
Everybody can always use more bedrooms and bathrooms and kitchens and waiting staff and a butler or three.
I dunno I think showing how much Nick’s parents fucked up his perception on relationship and women or how Amy ruined the lives of women just as much as men should have been left in.
Get rid of that beard, I dare you slut. I fuckin’ double dare you.
He’s got fake teeth!
Re: (2) – Hey man, he just worked there.
He should get rid of his beard, but maybe keep the facial hair.
I think it would have been interesting for sure, but I think think is wasn’t necessary to tell the story.
Fincher’s films already tend to be on the longer side and I liked how stream-lined this was, sticking to the story at hand and not relying too heavily on flashbacks.
It implied a lot of back-story without side-tracking the narrative away from Nick/Amy.
Having not read anything about the film at all before watching it (I’d only seen the teaser and avoided everything else), I could tell Nick had an interesting relationship with his parents and clearly hated being compared to his father without it being explained why.
Nick and Margo reminded me of Brandon and Sissy in the film Shame, it’s clear they have history with their parents that messed them up but we never find out exactly what it is.
Different strokes for different folks I guess. Sometimes I think knowing the source material is a disadvantage when it comes to seeing the film, you expect to see more than the film has time to show.
He could shave if off, then using some of that Patreon money I heard of, make into a fake beard, then glue it back on.
That way, they could have a half of each episode with bearded Jay and half with a clean shaven Jay.
A Solomonic solution, don’t you think?
in the ………………………………………..
Maybe it’s the rotation of the Earth and the distance from the equator coupled with the differences in atmospheric pressure due to height from sea level, causing distortions in the sound recording playback and desynchronization due to difference in the speed of sound through air of various thickness, compared to practically non-changing speed at which video images are moving at towards the observer, i.e. speed of light?
Quick! Both of you! Post your coordinates and height from sea level!
Or don’t… I don’t care…
Quit warren about the small stuff. It’ll give you a cancer.
Maybe he could pull some strings through his Canadian connections and become a honorary lumberjack?
Jay you mothefucker, shave that beard and I’ll murder your family!
I’m waiting for Tyler Perry to remake Paul Walker’s last ride.
Sadly, he still keeps failing to appreciate the streetlights the same way Paul Walker did.
try Chrome, it will fix the problem (I tried it in Firefox first and got that issue)
Why not go the “The Fast and The Furious” way and call it “Dumb & Dumber”?
Or “Dumber Dumber”? “Dumber Dumb”? “Dumba-Dumba”? “Daaaammaaaah”?
It’s like “Up” but with less balloons and no talking aminals.
Clearly, street lights are more about tree stand safety.
Unless they are gas powered in which case they combine the best of both worlds.
I don’t know, guys, the effects at the end seemed kinda cheap. Where are the water splashes? A bit lackluster with the explosions as well. Get Michael Bay in on this, he’ll probably like working on something that has a plot.
We can’t have nice things because capitalist oligarchy is hoarding the fruits of the labor of the proletariat who remain merely a workforce in the production chain without the ownership of the means of production which are kept in the hands of he oligarchy through manipulation of values both monetary through the control of the state and the legislature and moral through the conditioning of the population to adopt a consumerist attitude and view of the world.
Wait… what did I just write?
Indeed. Particularly regarding pastry chefs.
Don’t you remember?
He’s into “based on really real true story events of historic thing people”.
It also seemed like they might have had no clue either.
Exactly, I know when I saw the first Xfiles movie years ago the voices all sounded super high pitched, and when I saw the Interstellar trailer for the first time in the theater the audio was out of sync.
One thing I do think is consistent though is digital project: it always looks pixelly, and the colours are really washed out when I see stuff in the theater and then when I see it again on blu ray it looks a million times better
Not so much that there is an expectation of the negative view as that their schtick has from the start been pointing out flaws inter-cut with absurdist humor.
And it’s not just “a list of plot holes”.
They point out both technical flaws in the making of the movie or the writing of the story, and explain why they are flaws.
A flaw in the story or movie does not have to be a plot hole for it to be a flaw.
I actually think they weren’t hard enough on this movie, they didn’t even get into how mysognistic it is, and how the plot is dumber than the average episode of CSI Miami.
I really wanted to like this movie because I’ve liked everything by Fincher except for Benjamin Button. And the directin in GG was all great, but the story was a complete mess, all the twists are obvious from the get go, the motivations of the characters, especially Amy make no sense.
I keep hearing people defend this movie as a satire. What was so satirical about it? it felt like it was taking itself pretty seriously, and expressing its views in earnest.
Everything in it is trite stereotypes that have been in movie and TV forever. Marriage is hell? wow original. Never trust a woman, she’s probably psycho! What is this the 1950s?
I just don’t buy why she even wanted to kill herself, that was a major problem with her arc. She was a psychopath and wanted revenge, what good does that do if she’s dead? They explained a motive for him to stay with her because of the money. But she had the money, why didn’t she just leave? It’s not like they’d been married 25 years and had a bunch of kids. They’d been together 5 years and had 18 months of rockiness. Later on she turns out to be hannibal lector type super villain, I just don’t buy anyone that calculating and narcissistic killing themself.
It burns right through it.
It can also be used to light cigarettes and blind your opponents.
Don’t point it at police helicopters though, they don’t like that.
That was my immediate reaction to it. The Tyler Perry character is the comic relief sidekick who is a lawyer famous for getting men who killed their wives proven not guilty against irrefutable evidence. They dig up femme fatale troupes even Frank Miller would be embarrassed to use.
They cut into it a lot more than most critics, and their praise is for the directing, which I agree is good. But the story is a mess. Just calling something a satire doesn’t justify how dumb and sloppy and insulting this movie was. What is so satirical about it?
I was gonna reply with some explanations and some agreements but then one of my Firefox windows crashed and it was all gone. Too many opened tabs of undownloaded porn I guess.
You were supposed to be screaming in terror you fuck.
(2) actually they set up the fact that he mistook nuts for food in the first half.
Jay should shave his head and keep the beard.
Penis batting. Bat-penis. Bat-pen is. Ben’s pet is.
They fucked up there with that design.
We need more satanic computerized sofas that feed on little children.
How else are we to unlock the portal to hell?
Chanting? Pyramids? I THINK NOT!
It was satirical on the news media and marriage.
I wouldn’t call the story “sloppy”, perhaps “unrealstic” but the whole film (and the third act especially) was surreal, it reminded me of a David Lynch film (Blue Velvet specifically).
I think a lot of people complaining about the story are taking it completely seriously, instead of treating it like a dark comedy, like Fargo.
Blip’s seek is broken.
” it felt like it was taking itself pretty seriously”
No way, it was very dry humor but it was clearly played for laughs.
Maybe it’s an English thing my theatre consistantly laughed throughout and all the reviews over here praise it as a “dark comedy”.
“Never trust a woman, she’s probably psycho”
That was not the message of the film at all, the cop and the sister were both women and very smart and capable. Amy was a psycho who happened to be a woman but wasn’t a stand-in for all women.
And just because an idea has been done before doesn’t mean it’s not good, watch “Everything is a remix” all stories are made up by combining existing tropes and characters.
Can anyone get in contact with the guys and let them know Blip is broken, worse than before. Is there any alternative?
no, its blip. using chrome.
Just click on the Blip logo in the lower-right corner while the video is running. This launches the video in a new window (on Blip’s site), which solves the problem with timeline control.
Lightning Fast Tech Support
Jay’s eye rolls were progressively getting worse and funnier with each passing moment. It was beautiful
“their schtick has from the start been pointing out flaws inter-cut with absurdist humor.”
I agree and I’m not complaining about that.
I do sort of blame RedLetterMedia for this modern trend of idiots pointing out “plotholes” and acting like that’s the same as criticism.
With their Starwars reviews, they pointed out the sheer number of plotholes and plot conveniences as well genuine criticism and analysis, it was the icing-on-the-cake like the dark humor.
But there seem to be a lot of idiots out there (like CinemaSins) who think pointing out “plotholes” is all you have to do to be a critic.
Everything from RedLetterMedia has that balance of nit-picking, jokes and genuine criticism/analysis.
I think Half in the Bag is balanced slightly more towards those first two, but that’s not a problem for me, I don’t watch the show for an in depth analysis of films, I watch it to hear their brief opinion and watch them messing around.
On the flip-side Previously Recorded is more heavily tailored towards analysis/discussions and has fewer jokes (although it’s still funny).
That creepy doll reminded me of ‘Alice Sweet Alice’ movie. It was much better though.
That’s why it’s called “blip.”
Did anyone get a Vertigo vibe from Gone Girl? Lotta similar elements and concepts.
There’s always a glimmer of fascination in Mike’s eyes when he talks about the Warrens. Doesn’t he know that they were exposed as frauds? Doesn’t anyone know this? The Warrens are full of shit. Amityville was a hoax. It goes beyond “whether you believe it or not . . . ” The line should be, “you almost certainly shouldn’t believe it, because these two are frauds.”
Since Mike brought up Walter White/Breaking Bad in his GG analysis, I just wanted to update from our BB discussion in the Godzilla thread that on the advice of many of my RLM commenters I did go back and re-watch the whole BB series this past summer, and I have to say I rescind my earlier criticism of the first few seasons. Really enjoyed the show all the way through, I think I’ll have to chalk my initial negative reaction up to: ‘right show, but wrong time’.
But as Mike points out the bright cop is completely sidelined and ineffectual in the second half of the movie. Affleck’s sister was by far the best character in the film, and that actress really shined especially as an unknown surrounded by better known actors. But sexism aside, I just can’t get past how dumb the actual mystery thriller plot was.
A little surprised Jay hasn’t watched it yet. Maybe its one of those things where if people you know hound you about watching a certain flick or show too much you wind up not wanting to watch it.
I just don’t find it successful as a satire on any of the above things you mentioned. It’s neither funny or insightful enough about either. If it was meant to be a dark comedy maybe he shouldn’t have shot it in the exact same style and tone as Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Was that also meant to be a satire?
The film would be more interesting and intelligent if Amy was actually a fleshed out character and not a cartoon super villain. If Affleck actually had abused her, or the dynamic between them was a bit more grey, but once the ambiguity of the first act is dispelled, he is wholly sympathetic, while she just turns out to be a monster.
Satire and surreal are types of styles, not levels of quality. There are good and bad films in these styles, effective and non-effective. But if dark comedy is what they were going for than Fincher should have flexed his Fight Club/house of cards muscles instead of his Zodiac/GwtDT ones.
Yeah, and it’s extra tough with a show like BB or the Wire or the Sopranos where so many people praise it that it’s hard to go in with objective expectations. I know I didn’t see the Godfather until I was in 2nd year of film school for exactly that reason, but that was one where it lived up to all the hype.
I kind of wish RLM had a HitB type series about TV shows, they hint a little bit about Game of Thrones, or Breaking Bad or Community, but I still feel mostly ignorant of their views on a lot of acclaimed and popular shows other than how Mike feels about shows that have titles that start with STAR TREK, and end with THE NEXT GENERATION. (which granted is my favorite show so I’m not complaining)
She was side-lined because the narrative wasn’t about her, that doesn’t mean she wasn’t a capable character. That’s like saying the movie is racist because Tyler Perry’s character is side-lined for the first third of the film (only appearing on a TV).
I agree the mystery plotline got stupid but just don’t see that as a flaw, it worked for the first third of the film and that’s when it was important, like the female detective character the mystery plot becomes unimportant later on. Complaining that’s it’s stupid is like complaining the mystery plot in Hot Fuzz is stupid.
I agree with you on Margo, despite everyone talking about Rosamund Pike and Tyler Perry, she was my favorite actor in the film.
Fincher is one of the only modern directors who can stand confidently in the film directors pantheon with masters like Hitchcock and Kubrick.
Except the all too clever dialogue continued throughout the movie.
I guess for me more the issue is that the mystery plot, and the ambiguity was a lot more interesting than anything they wheel out in the third act. I don’t think that detective SawyersgirlfriendfromLost, was a sexist character, just that the movie/story lets her down, she starts out with so much promise and then gets nothing to do afterwards.
We larf at stately Wayne Manor and guffaw at Downton Abbey.
I don’t know if Disqus will let me post links but I think Mark Kermode sums up what I like about the film better than I could.
He makes the point that it works as a companion piece to The Social Network and I agree, I think a lot of people’s criticism stem from the film being so many different things and flitting between so many genres but I don’t see that as a flaw.
It’s an amazing trick that Fincher manages to pull off all of these conflicting genres and maintain and consistent tone with something so surreal and weird and turn it into something commercially successful,
I think what made her different is that she was not a typical movie femme fatale. She was true unbalanced and mentally ill
Before Magic, there was Trilogy of Terror–the real granddaddy of haunted doll movies:
Who knows. maybe it was genuine but when the cash started rolling in they played things up? Anyway, you weren’t there so don’t talk in such absolutes. It’s arrogant to assume anything.
I call and raise.
WARNING: Jumpscares at 25:59 and 31:38.
Because fuck these jumscare-loving hacks.
::Watches the opening::
You guys aren’t even trying to act anymore, are you?
Anybody else hear about this:
You heard of the “Chucky” stinger at the end of ANNABELLE? He was wearing an old Who “Tommy” tee-shirt.
Obviously, they’ve beaten us to it, and they’re well on their way to “Marvel”-izing a whole Monster Toy thing.
I guess it depends what you were expecting. I think if they’d stuck with the mystery story all the way through it would be a sub-par detective film.
The characters weren’t built for that, the mystery doesn’t hold up for that use, the mystery is just the set-up for satire and dark comedy. It’s the bread not the filling.
If you’re just watching it for the mystery you’ll be disappointed but that’s not a failing of the film, maybe the marketing but they couldn’t accurately market what it was without spoiling some of the reveals.
It’s like (500) Days of Summer, that films starts out like a cliche rom-com but then turns that on it’s head and uses the tropes of that genre to explore something else entirely.
The third act was about stretching the characters and going as extreme as possible, the characters both show what they’re really made of (Nick starts playing the media’s game, Amy finally kills someone) and these two horrible people end up stuck together. It also takes the genre to it’s extreme too, with an excessive amount of sex and gore, dialing everything up to 11 before it suddenly calms down when Amy returns and the media get bored of the story.
I can’t imagine it ending any other way “not with a bang but a whimper”.
If it was a straight mystery story, they’d either catch Amy or Nick would go to jail, neither of those are particularly interesting or fit with the themes of the film.
In the absence of any compelling evidence for the existence of something supernatural (ghosts, demons, etc.) it’s perfectly reasonable to dismiss any claims about them as bullshit. It’s not arrogant.
We all love Ghostbusters. Maybe Mike just wants to believe some of it can be true. If anything concerning The Warrens’ adventures were to be true, then someone taking the next step, and coming up with proton packs and particle throwers to catch ghosts, is within possibility.
All you need to know about ghostbusting, and how sad it is in real life, was in that tv show Ghost Hunters. How they managed to make a reality show about nothing happening, and last 10 years is beyond comprehension.
You didn’t have to have to. I knew you were kidding the minute you said women aren’t evil.
Women are fyucking evil.
Ah, the old “blame the parents” trope. I prefer the “she’s just a bitch” version. Cleaner.
A fraud that hacks.
Oh, yeah, I laughed continuously from the mid-way switch to the end. My biggest complaint, actually, is that it didn’t go quite as over-the-top as I was hoping. I wanted AMERICAN PSYCHO X 10. Just like the guys said, the ending is a real deflation.
No, and I don’t care to hear about it now.
“If it was meant to be a dark comedy maybe he shouldn’t have shot it in the exact same style and tone as Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”
That’s just Fincher’s style at the moment, The Social Network was shot the same way too.
The gummy-bear scene could practically have been in The Social Network just replace Nick and Margo with Mark and Eduardo.
Fight Club is a dark comedy and that looks similar to Se7en.
The changes you describe would make it completely different movie, one similar to Zodiac or Dragon Tattoo, which is clearly what you expected this to be going in.
I’m sorry you didn’t enjoy it, I’m a huge Fincher fanboy too (as you can probably tell). I’m not arguing to prove you wrong, just pointing out why I thought it was so great in the hopes you could find something to appreciate in it.
I think it’s a shame people aren’t able to appreciate this film as much as his others, just because it’s the tone of Fight Club/House of Cards but shot in the style of Zodiac/Dragon Tattoo.
It’s interesting you brought up House of Cards because I think Amy is just as cartoonish as Frank Underwood, she could be his young, female protege.
We need to talk about the fact that indie movie loving hipster Jay didn’t know who Rosamund Pike is. What a poser hackfraud! I bet he only watches Michael Bay movies when nobody is around! Explain yourself!!!
Whenever she was talking. I didn’t notice it quite so much with the others. Ben Affleck, particularly, speaks like a stuck-in-the-tweens romantic version of what a Princess wishes her prince would say to make her gooey, when in flashback. The rest of the time he sounded normal to me. Granted, nobody ever speaks like “Hollywood” normal. People only write that way. But, it’s a Hollywood movie, so you gotta grant it some leeway.
Or, you don’t. Whatever.
What, pray tell, do you make of Nolan-Goyer-style dialogue, then, if you think this was bad?
I was thinking that I never saw TRILOGY OF TERROR (like Affleck’s penis). But, that pic brings it all back. Karen Black crawling around on her ass, screaming.
Yea, I wouldn’t have minded it going further but I think they pushed about as far the R-rating would go in America.
It got an ’18’ rating here in the UK, it has the splurge of gore and then everything dies down (no pun intended) not long after Amy get’s home.
It’s just like these cases in the news, if the victim does come home safe the news get’s bored and everyone just wonders away from the story.
That’s the feeling I got from the end of the film, I felt like I was right there with Nick and Amy everything is over and life goes on.
But who would host a Tv show review series? I mean we have Mike and Jay on HitB, Rich and Jack on PreRec, which would leave Josh and Jessi to host that. Also, what would they call it?
I’m about 20 mintues in, and there’s some real creative stuff, and some real un-creative stuff. And then there’s the stuff that makes you want to put your fist through your computer screen.
Oh gosh yes, I’d love to hear there thoughts on Community, Rick and Morty and Louie.
Why would anyone read your comment before watching the episode?
Maybe not an entire series but a special episode of Half in the Bag every so often.
I don’t think they could review a new show every month but maybe once/twice a year they could check in on all their favorite shows and talk about their favorite episodes.
That’s why Mike idolizes them.
Exactly, this isn’t like a person on trial it’s not “innocent until proven guilty”.
Like anything in science the burden of proof is on the person who claims it exists to prove it, until they present enough scientific evidence everyone else is allowed to call bullshit.
This is how religions get started “you can’t PROVE it’s NOT true, so you’re arrogant for assuming that”.
“he’ll probably like working on something that has a plot.”
If his previous filmography is anything to go by that’s not true.
If Michael Bay wanted a plot he had more than enough money to pay someone to write one.
I want to believe too. It would be awesome if ghosts were real. It would be awesome if there were a whole bevy of magical creatures and scenarios that were really real. I say that with complete sincerity. The problem is, I want to believe it only if it’s truly believable. My desire to believe doesn’t trump my desire for it to be really real–in other words, I don’t want to believe based on a willful ignorance of the unlikelihood but to believe based on any actual evidence.
Ignoring blatant fraudulence gets me no closer to my wish for really real magic and fantasy. I want there to be a million dollars in my bank account. If a psychic commented right now that indeed someone just donated that million into my bank account, it wouldn’t be enough for me to then suddenly believe it despite how much I want to–I’d have to then go check it, see it, call the bank to confirm, withdraw some of it, actually go through the process of testing it against reality.
Anything else seems like delusion to me.
Jumpscares have been a staple of hackfraudery for centuries, how could you not expect them here?
“The Warrens have been documented as frauds,” which is a fact, “so you should almost certainly dismiss what they report.”
Yes, wow, such unfounded, opinionated absolutes. I guess inasmuch as “if you drop something it will fall to the ground,” is an absolute . . .
I want ghosts to be real too, but I don’t want to believe in them based on clear delusion or grasping at straws; I want to believe based on it actually being believable.
Dragon’s Milk has got to be the grossest name for a drink I’ve ever heard.
Exactly. I’m like “wouldn’t it be cool if… too bad everything points to not. Still, it makes for good narratives.”
It’s going to be rough filling Bale’s cowl.
Affleck would have to totally reinvent the character and while I think Ben is a serviceable actor I don’t see him capable of reaching that plateau.
Well, RLM is notorious for putting jumpscares in video’s about horror movies and not many people like them. I’m always wary about these kinds of video’s, and I’m very sure I’m not the only one.
Everyone expects them, not everyone can anticipate when they will strike. Thus, I supply nifty time codes!
As far as Nolan-movie-dialogue, I don’t have an issue with it.
I suppose you could make a case fort it being a bit heavy handed, but never do I hear it as unnatural to the point of distracting from the movie.
Nolan movies are for the most part action movies and I believe he allows that to shine through.
Best episode in a long time. Mike’s British impression was priceless.
I think so. And like Hitchcock his movies usually revolve around the same theme. I was actually referring to specific scenes though; Like SPOILERS FOR VERTIGO! when the presumably dead girl has to go blonde for the obsessive male, or the bespectacled non love interest who is the true soul mate!
Your small comment led me to come up with a zack snyder script, hes trying to hit on a computer nerd at a bar and some mafia overhear him brag about being a pro hacker.
Cut to zack snyder tied to a chair with his gun against his head being forced to “hack”, he types e=mc2 into the keyboard and it somehow hacks the computer and sets of a silent alarm. The mafia then get into a gunfight with the security and cops while zack snyder dresses as a janitor and escapes.
I have too much time on my hands.
They also did one for Robocop, and from how you describe this, it seems to be the exact same experience. Some skits are really, really good, but most are just bad. I actually kinda want to rewatch the Robocop one though.
I found your reply scarier… Well I did shite out some bolts, but I didn’t want to have to admit that.
Before you ask I was told they made you faster.
Some day, that man may end up running for office.
Whos is this old woman talking at me, rick bermans wife?
Same thing goes for “Star Wars: Uncut”, which is the one that came out before this one.
He should go back to Amish Jay.
Those were effects? Well I never…
Yes, get Bay in! Then it would have pointless in/out zooms, loads more of the shaky cam work and the action will up extremely close, then no bugger will be able to tell what is actually going on.
Truly a pro with special effects.
English impression, not British. Only the English talk like that, not the Welsh, Scots or Irish.
Sorry but I just have to point that out. lol.
Everything from RedLetterMedia has that balance of nit-picking, jokes and genuine criticism/analysis.
I think Half in the Bag is balanced slightly more towards those first two, but that’s not a problem for me
Only thing is, since insight is not something you can just turn off, they end up nit-picking and joking about actual issues more often than other “idiots out there”.
Who tend to pick one or two points and keep beating that dead horse regardless of if there is something to actually beat on there in the first place, then they make it into a self sufficient non sequitur reference that they keep repeating through future episodes.
E.g. Nostalgia Critic and his apologies for badmouthing Mako.
Or more recently, pot banging maids in “The Princess Diaries 2”.
What’s her name?
Well, not all English talk like that either.
No, but it is one of the distinct English accents…not Welsh, Scottish or Irish.
I was thinking the same thing. She’s done some solid mainstream work like Jack Reacher, Fracture, and Pride & Prejudice– as well as some schlocktastic shit like Doom and Surrogates. How has he not seen her? She’s become Hollywood’s go-to actress for those cold wasp parts.
At least he didn’t do an impersonation of Ben Affleck’s penis.
I was just going to write that.
As for “those cold wasp parts” – she DID play Miranda Frost (get it… it’s a pun) in Die Another Day.
It took a little time to reattach my keys after repeatedly smashing my face into my keyboard, but after it was all over, I’ve gotta say I’m not disappointed I watched it.
Being that I’m a shoe in for Hell, I’m glad I know what to expect now.
Agreed. I’ve seen people defend what the likes of the Warrens and psychics do – “They give people hope…what’s wrong with that?”. It’s false hope, and it’s a predatory exercise designed to extort money from people by using their genuine feelings of grief and hurt. It’s absolutely disgusting as a concept.
Decent people recoil when they hear stories of old people being scammed out of their savings, of people conning others out of money by claiming to be sick….and rightly so. Yet some of those people will then defend the actions of psychics, and I just don’t get how they can do that when it’s the exact same process.
4 minutes 10 seconds.
Thanks. I you find something similar in the future be sure not to post that too.
Ok… What is wrong with that footage of Mary Franklin (Lucasfilm senior something something fans something)?
Frame rate? Focusing? Light? Her ceaseless shaking?
It’s an actual physical burden to watch that part of the video.
Thanks for the heads up… A FUCKING DAY LATER!!!
But seriously, it’s October. Tis the season to– well– you know…
When George Lucas and Rick Berman where shoving down our throats how digtial projection was going to give everyone the same experience, my response was “if it exists then people are going to find a way to screw it up.” Digital projection doesn’t solve blown-out speakers, dim bulbs, bad EQ, poor auditorium design, keystone, torn screens or poor sound proofing in multiplexes. Bad theaters that never serviced their film projectors are never going to service their digital ones either. On top of that, the first generation digital projectors were sub-HD, the second generation was slightly above HD and now that 4k projectors are more affordable, we have TVs with that much resolution.
I think George is pointing a shotgun at her off screen.
Still a better love story than Twilight.
Thanks for spoiling Serial Mom you sons of bitches!
But are they Nazi pig-fuckers?
Either way, still a better love story than Twilight.
Is that Morse or Braille?
You weren’t disappointed? Did expect it to be bad, or were you surprised by the actual good stuff in it?
I only know her from Die Another Day, which I was surprised Mike didn’t mention since he likes that movie.
Like Shoji Tabuchi playing his fiddle…
Seriously, look at him.
He’s more interested in that giant rat, all casual like… oh yeah, that shit be just Tuesday to him.
I am pretty sure you meant to say “son of bitches!”
You are welcome.
She was also in The World’s End. I guess that answers what many have been asking about, what are their thought on that movie: they haven’t seen it.
It provided foresight.
Watch the videos using Firefox from Blip’s RSS feed page. http://blip.tv/at4w/rss It will use Firefox’s built-in video player, or you can download the video and watch them with an offline player.
It’s Fozzie, which is kinda like Farsi in that being fluent in either is a surefire way to get you on the NSA watch list.
In Bosnian (Croatian, Serbian… same shit, slightly different box) “With Affleck…” is pronounced almost identically as “With a stain…”
It’s from German “der Fleck”, meaning “stain” or “spot”.
Its a London trash accent. The accents of England are wildly varied not just Irish, Welsh, Scottish and London.
You have all heard what a hobbit sounds like from lord of the rings i assume? Well I come from the part of England where that accent exists in reality, its only 4 hours outside of London by train.
The specific type of accent mike is going for is clearly the sid vicious / sex pistols retro punk style accent.
Being real or imaginary is enough to get you on an NSA watch list these days.
Twilight is a love story? I thought it was an experimental psychological movie made to see what amount of humiliation and hatred the average human male can suffer before going on a killing spree.
I guess i learn something every day.
Foresight in to what?
There’s, what some might consider, a clue in the last sentence of my initial post.
I am pretty sure you meant to say “son of a bitches!”
Jay has seen Game of Thrones but not Breaking Bad. Should we kill him?
So Max Payne?
Fuck you, you selfish stupid asshole.
No, it wasn’t a theater problem, there was something weird about the sound recording or editing in this movie. If I can find a sample online at some point I’ll cite an example.
Even after he confessed to basically being unoriginal I still don’t like his videos because he’s not very intelligent. He’s the Ohio version of PewDiePie
What are your thoughts on your other neighbors, the Queens?
Oh no, it’s not like you can skip it.
Well, did FraudMojo or WatchHacks did right this time with a moopie list like this?
I think the point of the “Amazing Amy” character is to lay the foundation of her sociopathy/psycopathy. Her parents gave her book character all the achievements and desires she never had. They also sent her off to boarding school which is another sign of them being emotionally distant. I agree with you that the detective wouldn’t have had to just throw her hands up since the kidnapping happened in her jurisdiction. Like you said though, where the movie leaves it open ended. Another great movie about marriage is the Ryan Gosling classic, Blue Valentine! That one is quite the first date movie, step aside The Notebook!
Besides that, you guys are excellent! Keep up the great work! Why does no one ever bring up that the clones in AOTC are by definition slaves?
So…were the Warrens a precursor to the Haunted Collector?
Did they have a hack Ghost Hunting show on Syfy too?
Yea I can’t stand a lot of that so called “movie criticism” on youtube, so I don’t watch it.
You’re right even when RLM do resort to nit-picking, it’s at least a higher quality nit-picking, nits that deserve to be picked or nits that at least exists.
Around the time Looper came out it was the worst, so many people pointed out “plotholes” that weren’t even holes, they were just things deliberately left unexplained or they were explained and people weren’t paying attention.
I found myself defending Prometheus a lot too, not because it was a great movie (it sure had problems) but because people were attacking it for completely the wrong reasons.
Half in the Bag gave it a positive review and then did a video where they jokingly complained about all the “plotholes” and that was the one everyone shared.
Ugh, stupid people make me so angry sometimes.
What is the beer that they are drinking, it looks great. Also Gone Girl was everything I was hoping for.
The only good thing about “Our Robocop Remake”, I think it was called, is the disturbingly well made rapist scene.
The warrens were a precursor to my blue balls.
How can movies i never heard of be overated?
What circle of Hell do you think this will be shown in?
I love Gillian Flynn. She was great on Community!
So Neil Patrick Harris kidnapped Gillian Gone Girl and turned her into a doll? I may or may not have been paying attention.
Isn’t there a kidnapping plot in How I Met Your Mother?
I was going to write “R.I.P. Bob Saget”, then I remembered he’s not John Ritter.
Would they have the time? World War 2 kept them pretty busy.
“Mr. Skin or GTFO.” — Hipster Jay McHackfraud
“But we have all these porn sites to search!” — The NSA
That’s not a shotgun, that’s Ben Affleck’s penis.
Tune in next time for Half in the Bag: All at Sea!™
No, but this was.
I thought Niel Patrick Harris was a guy that went around asking people to point out where they were touched ON a doll.
This Is Where I Touched Your Mother Kids. And Then She Died.
It’s a musical.
make it a muppet musical movie and I will give you all the money.
All of it.
Sailor Mike and Jay?
Will a storm come by and maroon them on an island? Mike did mention Gilligan’s Island. Intentional foreshadowing!?!?
I will be disappointed if Mike isn’t the skipper.
Half Cop, Half Wolf
What the fuck.
Kept who busy? The pigs or the Nazis?
It’s a money-funnel.
For collecting money from girls and women who think that SMeyer can write.
$3.3 billion on a budget of $385 million for all five movies.
First movie paid for the entire series, with $24 million to spare, and that’s not counting over $200 million it made in DVD sales.
Also it’s a completely unrelated and absolutely awesome ELO song.
You remove that filth right now lady!
Of all the putrid filth you had to sink to the level of “Zwack.”
You should feel ashamed.
Telly Savalas had 12 years on Karen Black.
Half Lucas, half farts
What the fuck
Chuck Jones just got the height and the hair color wrong.
Also, where they are supposed to be sitting.
Is that uncut too?
Oh man I loved Serial Mom..
Couldn’t care less about these 2 movies tho, but this was a good HiTB..
I see what you did there, but my comment remains and is hereby further emphasized.
What the actual fuck.
Hello? Niel Patrick Harris?
There’s a guy here on the internet who wants to put you in a Muppet movie musical… Yes?
OK, I’ll hold.
…and that is why we must have drills every weekend. People get confused.
I think you’re getting her mixed up with Gillian Jacobs, heiress to the cream cracker empire.
Half Stupid, half Wizard.
All Stupid Wizard.
See, I can do it too!
Half Emperor, half Palpatine
All Emperor Palpatine.
I can do it as well
Is that another Gillian Glynn book?
It’s the most expensive beer that Patreon money can buy.
Kathleen Turner Overdrive?
You’re from the shire too?
That’s the plot to every hentai ever.
I do, I swear I only had a tiny taste and it was truly awful. I wouldn’t be surprised if a bottle full of jizz actually tasted better.
half rum, half whiskey
all fucked up.
i got it wrong.
Why don’t you capitalize your words?
do you mean a nazi that fucks pigs or someone who fucks nazi pigs?
i thought it was a creepy movie about a 200 year old pedophile stalking a school girl….
i laughed so hard i spat on the monitor. you win today.
Bionicle is back! All aboard the hype train!
nagh thats not true… i dont know why i have done it for 15 years or so… now i’m curious. why am i doing that?
“Bob Saget doesn’t do what Bob Saget does for Bob Saget.
Bob Saget does what Bob Saget does because Bob Saget is … Bob Saget!”
Dumb & Dumber: Tokyo Drift
Why not this?
Why couldn’t David Fincher and Ridley Scott simply team up to make The Girl With the Dragon in Her Cooch?
You mean my life will be nothing in the grand scheme of things? You mean time erases everything?
They’re jokes though. Why would anyone want to be warned of jokes?
Why not Broseph Stalin?
am i the only one who thinks that bionicle should be about bionic testicles?
Bob Saget! Explorer of the sea!
Insulting the best Lego toy is worse than insulting Rich Evans
Fair enough, but I think it works on House of Cards, that show strikes the right tone/balance and I always feel both fully invested dramatically but also entertained by the surreal aspects., like Underwood breaking the fourth wall.
I think maybe I would have had a better experience if I’d had an audience reaction, when we went there were only 5 other people in the theater (surprising for an opening night) and they were all teenagers who I don’t think were really following it.
The Queens’ mansion on Arrow is also the Xavier School for Gift Youngsters in X-men 2 and X-men 3. I went to see it when I was on Vancouver island, what neither Xmen nor Arrow shows you is if you turn around and face the other way the pacific ocean is right there!
Someone liked Die Another Day?
Mr. Plinkett liked the sword fight, I have to agree with him on that.
The 8th. It’s where all Hack Frauds go.
while i totally agree… i still want a show about a bionic testicle!
So does jay like muscle butts or what? What’s with the beard joke.
Jay’s arm muscles are butts? Whaaaaaaaaaatttt?
These words and images probably require lots of awful explanations, but the red man reaching for the robot cock is good enough for me.
Muscly man butts bro.
Hey I found this
trailer and thought it was funny. The next week Annabelle came out. I
know they don’t take BotW suggestions, but fans in the comment section
here might think this is funny. I do.
F MURRAY WHY
It’s a thing only 2000’s kids like me will understand. They’re rebooting the best fucking toy line in the history of man. That shit was amazing, it didn’t just rely on how cool it looked it drove kids in throw a unique mature story. They made it into four shitty movies though. The third one rips off TSHI alot
“The 600 series had rubber skin. We spotted them easy, but these are new. They look human… sweat, bad odor, everything. Very hard to spot. I had to wait till he moved on you before I could zero in on him.”
wait what? your a kid?… i thought you where the unabomber….
Half Chicken, Half Dance
Pound Sign: Truth
yeah i dont do embarrassed. you can tell from my pic.
Jay is drinking Dragon’s Milk, which is thick and bitter. Very tasty but a bit syrupy.
You english types don’t understand internet language
Thanks for recommendation on Insidious (it had a dumb spaghetti-shoveling ending though)
Those Kung Pow references, I love you hacks.
Jay you should try and rock some mutton chops before totally shaving off the beard
dont shave that beard off ya prick bastard… love the show btw you fucking asshole.
Nope. Science means that instead of believing anything, you need to test it first. Others can provide evidence for or against, but we are each responsible for our own homework. When people say “A Scientist has finally proven/disproven…” they are relying upon faith in the scientist.
Religions are technically mythology, which has nothing to do with needing to believe random shit. But, of course, many people get this wrong.
Most misunderstandings stem from a desire for certainty when there is practically none about anything.
……I’m American…..I’m a dumb.
A review for a creepy doll movie and neither of them mention “Black Devil Doll from Hell”?
What’s up with that goofy jangly music mixed way in the background while the reviews are happening? Does the review really need a sonic wallpaper soundtrack? Was it Mr. Plinkett’s music box? Was it “elevator music” since the house was going down the cliff, like musical foreshadowing? Have the twiddle bugs started a band?
I actually just found a bunch of my bionicles earlier today, up in the rafters. Still have the red and white dudes all put together in their tubes. Only found the rock guy’s mask though.
they shoulda had the house do a somer- a flipspin off the cliff, and then the house falls next to the clif and pulls out 2 house sized guns and start shooting handholds in the cliff with the guns. and then it does another flip it does 2 flips and runs down the cliff on the handholds. the mandarin.
Supernatural things aren’t real, Mike.
I believe they couldn’t find her in casino’s footage because she was still in disguise, she looked different.
Fucking hack frauds can’t even get a jump scare right. You’re supposed to bore the fuck out of us with at least thirty minutes of stationery footage of a dark middle class bedroom while an upper class white couple brush their teeth and exchange empty banalities off camera. Eventually the sheer tedium will lull your unsuspecting audience to near sleep and that’s when you shock them with a loud music sting and an image of something happening.
Now that Half in the Bag has taken to the high seas does that mean they plan to pirate all their movies from now on?
Okay, you hacks need to stop using this Blip shit. I can’t even watch the video!
Ohhh, man, Bionicle is the best!
Fuck off, ghost!
I remember on Toonami when they said they were gonna show the first animated movie after Dragonball. I was so hyped. I invited my friends, we got our toys, watch dragonball, then the movie started…those movies suck. Someone should send them in. The CG for 2003 is appalling. I would expect more from All State
I would love for the team-crew-group-perverts-alcoholics-cynical cunts-I would love for the RLM crew to watch those movies Miramax shat out and that one with Worf. Were any of them good?
It was already spoiled, Johan.
What is it with Ricks?
Rich Evans is turning in his grave.
Is that pronounced “Uni-coom?”
You’re wrong. Most of the seasons are great, but the last one definitely peters out. It ends with a whimper rather than a bang.
The people at Warner Bros. are not hack frauds, Stephen.
I know I got vertigo.
Yeah, fuck Blip.
You should shave your beard and keep the head.
I’ve just gotten word from Mr Affleck that he’s upset you don’t like his cock.
Stop bagging the good people at Warner Bros. Entertainment!
Jay is a lumberjack, motherfucker.
You don’t have a girlfriend, Wizard, quit your lying.
Ben Affleck is not, and will never be, batman.
You’re upset about the review of Gone Girl? Are you a regular Half in the Bag viewer? Because, in my mind, it got off almost scott-free.
Mike was on his game this episode. He was scatting and be-bopping all over the place.
i’m not english seppo.
This is a lie.
everything i say is a lie…
death to blip!
did you make paranormal? its ok we are not angry, but that kind of thing is unacceptable.
or a gay handlebar moustache.
I do have one, you cheap fuck. And if you want to bring up that I don’t have one because of Bionicle I only brought that up because it’s nostalgic to me and a lot of other people. You racist.
Goddamn it, Moses!
Tell me about it. I’ve been trying to take a bath for weeks.
Gone Girl is great. Dark, twisted, funny, satirical and the ending is disturbing as hell. It might not have won Mike and Jay over but it seems thematically a lot of it went over their heads. It’s worth watching, especially considering how boring this year has been for movies.
was that filmed in 7.62mm?
your implying they did.
game of what?
tis a fine beard english.
or you know to save time, he could just shave half…. no its stupid forget i said anything.
love it… but its not a number.
all americans do. they bottle feed them Coke as babys!
netflix said they want to make it with adam slanderer.
demons possess my hair.
i dont. i just get bored and dig a hole to sleep for 1000 years.
the c.i.a made chrome….
because there is two, is that cray, cray.
i would watch that!
its ben afleks penis!!!!
sorry just rewatching it. i cant believe i missed the opening beard thing was a gay joke… me so stupid.
I really think you guys should review the Maze Runner, genuinely curious what you think of it.
I thought it was jennifer lopez, good call, I would never have been able to tell the difference.
I know that, but that is irrelevant is it not? Not sure what your point is, sorry?
It was still English, not any of the other three.
If you want accuracy then it was kinda, sorta a Londoner mixed with a toff accent, but not quite… Actually I’m not sure any more.
F*** it, it’s British then…
Would you say his delivery was very Plinkett-esque?
I have been wondering why I had so little interest in both movies, Annabelle is clearly a boring run of the mill horror story which I learned the ending to when I was about 12 at a campfire.
Gone girl though, I just have no interest in at all. I sit and I hear people talking about this movie, mostly calling it a good film but I just don’t feel like its premise is interesting to me. Its better than another generic superhero movie but I just dont give two flying fucks about it.
The question really is do I give ANY flying fucks about it, so I watched the half in the bag three times now and walked away with the exact same impression that I went in with. This film does not interest me at all, and no, ben afleks penis does not interest me either.
Lol, not at all.
I just didn’t want to be associated with that accent that Mike was doing, so I had to distance myself from that immediately. >_<
face it everyone loves ben aflecks “little matt damon.”
yeah i had to google that. so i’m going to say no.
I was trying to remember what film ben aflek was in that felt like it had a similar feel to the trailer for gone girl, it was paycheck. Does anyone remember that film? I think uma jovavich was in it or something.
Yes I remember it. Good premise, executed poorly.
It was Uma Thurman.
another HITB where at the end I’m laughing and saying “for fucks sake!” but in a good way…keep the schlock coming!
Victims of Imperial Clone-ialism
Jay was spot on about David Fincher, he’s a brilliant director who has started to pick unambitious projects. Zodiac, Fight Club and The Social Network were all amazing films and the thing that made those movies great was how original they were and what a departure they were from what he’d done before. When he’s working with boring material though, he just makes boring movies. Benjamin Button may have been an overly sentimental crapfest but at least that was risky and a unique concept.
Not upset especially, just suprised by what in particular about it they’re choosing to criticise. Half In The Bag has never been “shoot down films for yucks” – if something is good, or mediocre, or terrible I usually expect them to be honest about it.
But this review seems to be saying “we didn’t like it because it didn’t do what we expected”, which is a bizarre reason to dislike a movie, particularly when you’re always pointing out how obvious a film is if it DOES follow established tropes.
Look at the fucking comments in here, with these half assed movie choices for hitb, they’re leaving us, the real critics, nothing to discuss.
Fuck this half baked click bate bullshit, at least pair up these stinkem-ups with something maybe approaching something we can disagree on with a bit of passion..
Gone gurl and Annabelly? who cares?
Gone Gurly vs Dramificent untalked?, Now there’s an argument we get get our teeth into..
Sort it the fuck out!
I hold the opinion that every 2nd movie he makes is a masterpiece, which is not to say that the ones inbetween can’t also be great, and for this pattern to hold you have to count House of Cards (which I do). [the ones I consider masterpieces denoted by an asterix for those who can’t count by twos!]
3. The Game
4. Fight Club*
5. Panic Room
7. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
8. The Social Network*
9. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
10. House of Cards*
11. Gone Girl
So for me at least, I’m really excited about whatever his NEXT project is. Which I believe is an HBO series with Gone Girl Flynn.
[For the record I consider Alien3 a good movie, but a bad Aliens sequel. And The Game, Panic Room & The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo all above average thrillers. Benjamin Button is the only truly awful movie he’s made, and as with Gone Girl that has more to do with story than technical execution., in my opinion]
Twilight is actually an instruction manual for girls on how to end up in an abusive relationship.
I do! It’s over the top and crazy, and that’s just fine by me.
Nah. You can hardly call that normal. That raising a child? That’s messed all the way up!
Would’ve been much more satisfying to have one or the other splay the other to their skeleton. Maybe both, WAR OF THE ROSES-style.
Sigh, I realize Fincher wasn’t put there to satisfy me, however.
There was a deep story? Anyway, we all know the only reason they’re bringing it back is because they realized Hero Factory doesn’t have shit on Bionicle. They thought they could fool kids to think it was something new, but they di’in’t!
What would you like to chat about, bucko? DRACULA UNTOLD?
Personally I think each season is better than the previous one. The ‘going out with a whimper’ works fine if you consider the 3rd episode from the ending: “Ozymandias” the ‘finale/climax’ and the final 2 episodes the epilogue/denouement.
Oh, you’re fyucking kidding me.
I guess the difference for me is the second half is what felt like cliche stuff to me, and the first half felt fresh and new.
I think Mike would probably like it based on other reviews. I was surprised how much I enjoyed it.
It’s a pretty effective scifi thriller, and entirely earnest. It does devolve into schlock in the last 10 minutes, but I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing
Ugh Dracula Untold… I got bored of that movie half way through… the trailer!
I have no idea mate, I haven’t seen it, nor has it been reviewd in here, but it might have been a better choice of pic than Annawhofuckingcares.
Just my couple a cents..fucko
Would you like Benjamin Button more if it was a different actor playing the lead? I liked a lot of aspects of the movie, but thought Brad Pitt was horribly miscast and took a lot away from the film.
Now I know how us 80s kids look to other generations.
Maybe he’s doing one film for the studios followed by one he’s actually really passionate about, but doesn’t think they will be interested in or is riskier and has a higher potential for failure.
That sounds about right. Most of his best films are all movies I can’t believe a studio would finance.
No problem with Brad Pitt for me. My main 2 issues with Benjamin Button:
1) the movie relies a LOT on the old troup of what I believe Spike Lee refers to as ‘Mystical Negro’ characters who show up to provide sage like wisdom and aid to the white protagonist
2) (and more importantly) the movie squanders its interesting premise by having BB’s backwards aging never affect the plot at all!!! Seriously if you made a movie about a woman who falls in love with a man who has a degenerative neurological condition it would be the exact same movie. It’s such a cool idea to have someone age backwards, and the VFX of how they pulled it off are amazing, but it has ZERO impact on the plot, so the whole thing is a waste of time.
Palpy my vote for the show’s title:
Hot Water Cooler
And it could be hosted by Jesse and the Wizard, with the other RLM guys and guests to comment.
I really enjoyed jay reading the intro to Annabelle and then after the star trek actor line going “Mike wrote this”. I still hate jump scares, but whatever, I still even HitB a lot, and this episode was solid like the rest of them.
Some of the most interesting RLM moments come from when somebody attempts to defend a movie that they know doesn’t deserve a defense. Between Mike with Annabelle and Jack with Theodore Rex it’s really interesting to see somebody who is smart knowingly defend a movie without any real merit.
Do you mean cube: hypercube the recubening?
Is that stolen from the Snowpiercer storyboard?
Half in the bag always has a soundtrack in the background. Its like in V world matrix where they play songs all the way through even if its just a mundane conversation taking place.
I agree how dare they throw together something knowing there was nothing else worth a review. Its like they were aware that we have been demanding regular content.
You might still even HITB a lot, I but I still even a lot of things including this snowglobe.
I have noticed. But part of my shakes my fists in the air and asks “WHHHYYYY???”. It’s not even good music, and doesn’t need to be there. It does not contribute anything to the experience.
So, on some level, I suppose that I still do not understand it.
Ok I think i can solve your problem.
Lets blame jack for the music selection.
Sometimes, the heart likes what the heart likes.
I got bored of that movie halfway through…the second word in the title.
I thought Gone Girl was about some ladies taking their tops off?
The worst thing ever with Gone and Girl in the title was Wild Girls Gone by the Upright Citizens Brigade. Also something allegedly about girls taking their tops off, it was actually a “movie” shot on a home video camera. Much like Redlettermedia’s material. Only unfunnier. If that’s possible. UCB the Comedy Central series was so good too.
Thanks, I have a heart condition.
Magical negro. Or numinous negro. Depending on who you ask.
No, but this was made with 7.62mm stock.
I hear that he supposes his toeses are roses. Erroneously.
Normal in italics. Because as far as the rest of the world is concerned they’re back to normal.
They’re back to how things were before, the only difference is they now know what the other is capable of, this is what “normal” is going to be for the rest of Nick’s life and that’s different kind of creepy.
I think that’s much more unnerving than a traditional Hollywood ending, with one of them killing the other.
But your entitled to your opinion.
It’s like poetry, they rhyme.
I think there is something about a story of good and evil, heroes and villains, and a mixture of sci fi and fantasy that is more captivating for kids than a robot factory. Did ya hear that, George?!
Next time please talk about “Under the skin” with Scarlett Johansson. I think this movie is especially interesting because it was originally supposed to cost way more money. This way they did not have the financial options to explicitly tell what was going on and focused a lot on subtle clues. Please check it out.
Jay has confirmed to us that he’s seen it and loves it. Don’t you watch them streams?!
No, I don’t but really nice to hear, that he even loves it. 🙂 Stream like in LiveStream? I had no idea that they do that. Are there recordings? Where can I watch the streams? Thanks for the quick answer so far!
Gone Girl is about how we dehumanize and construct fantasy versions of ourselves to be attractive to others, particularly the opposite sex, and how that facade is comically overvalued by the media and supersedes the truth in our personal lives.
It’s also a satire on marriage and how essentially most marriages are built on bullshit and willful ignorance in order to be sustainable. And if you ever had a serious relationship or knew or cared about how women actually think, you would also find the movie funny as fuck.
Judging this film as a straight-ahead crime thriller is like judging Starship Troopers as a straight-ahead sci-fi schlock or Happiness as serious melodrama. There would be a whole level of social commentary and satirical humour you’d be missing. That’s not the fault of the movie being boring, that’s the fault of the viewer.
Oh that`s right, I knew it was something like that.
I don`t think anyone is accusing the movie of boring. I acknowledge the movie is attempting to tackle the things you mentioned, I just don`t think it does a very good job at it.
Question. Have you seen the movie? Because it’s very hard to describe what makes the movie interesting without completely ruining it.
Half in the Bag the movie: Boozy Boathounds
Yea, I was expecting an empty theater. I went in the early evening the day it was released and the entire cinema was filled with old people other than me.
I remember thinking “they don’t know what they’ve gotten themselves into” and were expecting some to walk out but they were a great audience, a lot of laughter and gasps. Overhearing their conversations leaving the theater I gathered they were mostly women who’d read the book and dragged their husbands along.
I think it does make a huge different who you watch it with, I want to convince my brother to go with me when I re-watch it so I can see his reaction to the twists and gore but I don’t think I’ll be able to convince him to come without spoiling it. My sister wants to see it but she’s 16 so can’t.
Lol, just comment on English accents being very locational and that having an English accent isn’t really much more specific than saying “British accent”.
No I have not, although at this point Ive had the entire thing spoiled for me by several people who tried to convince me to watch it despite the fact I had no interest in watching it because its a drama and I dont give a general fuck about drama movies.
I might come back to it in two or three years and decide to try and watch it but generally dollar store trash novels and the stories therein don’t interest me, even if they star ben afleks penis.
I respect that.
My beef is that we just came out of an unprecedented summer of superhero-sequels and cgi-schlock. It would be a shame if people assumed based on Jay and Mike’s review that Gone Girl is a mediocre movie. It’s actually a very, very good movie, that’s well-made and well-executed, with a ballsy script and great performances. It even has bloody, bloody vengeance!
Sometime it feels like critics get so caught up in their own expectations that they forget to judge a movie in context with other movies.
Yea, House of Cards doesn’t play with genre as much as Gone Girl.
It’s clearly satirical from the start and Kevin Spacey is wonderfully hamming it up with his asides to camera.
This felt a bit like the same sort of story but the characters aren’t in on the joke, it’s underplayed instead of exaggerated; Amy spitting in the redneck’s drink would be the sort of moment Frank would relish with a wink at the camera, here it’s presented more mater-of-fact.
That said, I think it would have been awesome to see President Underwood on television for a brief second when the characters were channel hopping, it felt like they could have existed in the same universe.
I guess copyrights made any kind of cross-over impossible and the time period’s don’t match up.
Fair enough, but this movie has been unanimously praised by critics, so I don`t think you need worry too much about that. I actually think Mike and Jay cut this movie more slack than it really deserves.
I would also argue that we`ve just come out of an unprecedented summer of GOOD movies. It`s been at least a decade, maybe more since we had this many good movies in one summer, and on the whole 2014 has had a lot of great stuff on offer both of the popcorn variety and in terms of artsy cinema
It’s less a straight-a-head drama then a crime-thriller-satire. It has more in common with a Korean vengeance movie than … Life as a House or whatever a drama is. While there isn’t any ‘action-scenes’, there’s more sex and violence than you’d probably expect. It’s a hard R. It also has a great feel-bad ending that is common in Korean films but rare over here.
If you liked Fincher’s version of Girl with a Dragon Tattoo, you would probably like this movie. Although I consider Gone Girl more entertaining and more fun to watch.
Maybe I have selective movie, but it feels like I’m been bombarded by comic book movies, sequels and reboots. Some of these were actually good, but I admit it’s a blur.
I guess I’m just glad to have some variety this year.
I tend to avoid over hyped stuff (which is another part of why I have little interest in gone girl) so I avoided girl with a dragon tattoo, I went as far as to avoid spoiler about that film so that when I eventually do watch it I can enjoy it.
I get what you are trying to say, this isnt a movie you can easily class as “drama” then walk away because you dont like drama movies. That there is more going on that just a straight forward plot is obvious, however everything in the trailer and most of everything i have heard convinced me that this isnt the kind of movie I will enjoy or be interested in.
Now I am willing to admit I may be wrong about that, but not until people stop trying to force it down my throat because they liked it. I get it, you liked it and you think other people will enjoy too and are trying to advocate for it, but please try and remember not everyone has the same tastes and interests as you.
Think about it like this, you see I agree with you about super hero movies, I am completely, hundred percent on board. drama movies kind of fall into the same deal for me.
They talk about a bunch of stuff in their Pre-Rec streams on Twitch. They also upload them to their Pre-Rec YouTube channel. I usually treat them like podcasts and let them play in the background while doing other stuff.
I can’t even.
Hey, I hear you. I actively avoid reviews, this website — even basic descriptions — when there is a movie I’m vaguely interested in, for similar reasons.
That’s a really solid track record still. But that’s because I liked Alien 3.
I think the points you made, they are why I will come back and watch it someday. The thing I am struggling with isn’t why I dont want to watch it, i think i explained that well enough above, its why people are so over the top about this one particular movie.
You know how some films can twist your mind up into knots and leave you confused for days after? thats kind of how I feel about the hype for this film, its sounds like an ok movie based off a trash novel. So why is an ok movie being elevated to “masterpiece” by some people? Is it just the lack of anything else thats good being made(if you dont like super hero movies)?
I fully agree we need more variety, but that being said a summer which included:
X-Men Days of Future Past
Edge of Tomorrow
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
Guardians of the Galaxy
Captain America the Winter Soldier
is still pretty decent.
I think probably the most interesting summer of movies in terms of variety was 1999. Everyone knew star wars was coming out and would own the box office as the big splashy special fx driven popcorn epic, and so studios decided to stay out of its way and instead offered a lot of interesting counter programing like The Sixth Sense, Eyes Wide Shut, Blair Witch Project. Movies that would ordinarily never get play in the summer. Even Wild Wild West, while not very good was at least an incredibly weird movie for a mainstream summer release.
Autumn 1999 also had some really neat offerings as well
Most directors should be so lucky as to have even ONE movie on their resume as good as Se7en, fight club, social network or zodiac.
I never spoil movies for myself.. but I have zero desire to see either of these. Mostly because i have no interest in this dragon tattoo shit, and american horror filmes are usually crap these days.
I think that it’s a bit of both. It’s a legitimately a solid movie, a little pulpy, but not nearly as trashy as Jay implies in the review. The source material is well-regarded for the depth of it’s characters, because that’s essentially what the movie is ‘about’ — what people want to and choose to believe about each other, versus what they actually are.
But I do think some of the positive reaction is a result of the movie not being typical superhero/sci-fi action, AND not being low-budget, pretentious hipster-indie fare, either. I mean, don’t get me wrong, there’s great movies in both genres, but it wasn’t until Guardians of the Galaxy that I thought Marvel finally made a movie that worked end-to-end as a movie, without qualifications like “It’s great until the end when it turns into Ironman suits fighting fire people.”
Gone Girl is an interesting, uncompromising movie I can recommend without caveats. There’s not going to be a sequel, a prequel and Zach Braff isn’t in it. Yay!
All those movies are solid — and all of them, with the exception of Apes, are based on comics. But yeah, in between all sci-fi over-the-top comic-booky adventure it’s nice to have a movie like Gone Girl.
Sixth Sense and Eyes Wide Shut are good examples of what was missing this summer — the WTF? or “Ahhhhhh shit …” movie.
It’s kind of why I take all reviews with a heaping spoonful of salt. I mean, I’m sure I’ll watch and enjoy Space Cop once it’s finished but it’s not like Jay and Mike are even aspiring to make a great movie. Fuck, just making A movie is accomplishment. Filmmaking is such a collaborative, expensive medium that we should be blow away by the fact there are directors consistently good at it.
For sure. and I think the thing is a huge portion of what used to be movies is now on TV, specifically HBO et al. Because they don’t really make dramas anymore, I was actually surprised to see that Robert Downey Jr had that courtroom movie coming out (no idea if its any good or not). In the 80s and 90s there were always tons of dramas, and comedies, and thrillers, or traditional action films and romance movies, and then the odd spielberg or james cameron or other popcorn movies, but it seems like the only thing hollywood makes now is $200million VFX epicy movies.
I fully agree that the comicbook movies has reached maximum saturation. and while I’ve enjoyed all the Marvel movies to date, it would be nice if there was more variety of other stuff out there.
So I applaud Gone Girl for making the attempt, even if (for me) it was not wholly successful. at least it tried! and has proven worthy of discussion.
ugh Cube 2: hypercube. One of the best examples of a bad sequel to a great movie.
*Imagines a love song playing as Jack stares at Theodore Rex*
Even was supposed to be “enjoy”, I’ll admit though it was a pretty bing typo.
Jay, I agree with you on the point that Fincher is valuable in other areas than dark crime thrillers. However, I find it strange that you once mentioned “Benjamin Button” as a movie you didn’t think to be very good. I like Fincher and consider that movie to be his biggest departure in terms of content and possibly his very best. I don’t know the specifics regarding what you didn’t like about it, but I can tell you it was a rare time when all the flaws in a film’s storytelling and meaning, felt worth forgiving when the feelings that the movie generated through meticulous imagery and music were so effectively executed.
So Ben Affleck was in “Gone Baby Gone” and now he is in “Gone Girl” does that mean latter he will be in a movie called “Gone Woman Gone Gone”?
That’s what she said.
Jay:” We kind of don’t like Ben Affleck at the start of the movie..” My thought: “We’ve kind of never liked Ben Assflex ever.” He was passable in a few flicks but he’s like Collin Ferrell , not someone you’d want to meet in real life really (redundant?). I want to kill Ben Affleck to death.
The comments seem kinda harsh on this episode, ya’ll should relax, of coarse Annabelle would be on the show..Mike loves ghost stories! And it’s pretty hard to know a spooky movie sucks until you watch it, then you want to explain how bad it is. Plus.. October anyone? I think the guys hesitate to rip a flick as hard as Plinkett would since they’re more objective. I’d love to see a Halloween themed episode of HITB.
Annabelle and Jigsaw should hookup.
hopefully “career gone where?”
Just because we didn’t like the films didn’t mean we didn’t like the Hitb episode.
the HBO series is a remake of the C4 U.K show “Utopia.” one of the best shows ever!!!
DONT FUCK IT UP!!!!!
Happy Thanksgiving to any of my fellow Canucks on here! 🙂
Homophones, man, how do they work?
He wasn’t in Gone Baby Gone, that was his brother Casey Affleck. Ben directed it, though.
I hear the movie’s so bad they’re not even screening it for audiences.
course you would say that.
It’s like buackaroo, except fuckier.
no wait this ones better
“thats a bit rough.”
I believe those are called LGBT-phones nowadays.
sorry i’m in monday the 13th already… but eat a yam… or whatever you do there….
Fight Club grossed $37.03M domestically and $63.82M overseas for a worldwide total of $100.85M. Its production budget was $63M.
Taking into account advertising, prints, etc., this film lost money in its box office run as studios only get back roughly half of the box office gross for films.
It sold well in home video sales [VHS and DVD], though, and eventually broke a profit. 🙂
It was only supposed to be a 3 episode tour.
~A 3 EPISODE TOUUUUUUUUUR~
I’m surprised how good it was for how dumb its premise is.
Odd. I posted the link to that scene lower in the comments here.
It’s like syncing!
No, not our periods; our minds.
Half hack, half fraud
All Half in the Bag
Click lower right ‘blip’ lower to watch the video on the Blip website.
I have no issues with that video player there. I only have issues when the video player is embedded into webzones.
Fuuuuuck Cube was a good film for what it was. The whole thing was filmed inside one room, basically. They just changed colours to make it look like different rooms. 🙂 I was thinking about it the other day. Need to rewatch it. An example of good Canadian filmmaking.
Their first jump scare I thought was just part of footage they were showing from the film and that it would continue, like when they’ll go back and show more parts of the trailer. When that did happen I was like, “Oh. Ohhhhhhhhhh-
Gone Girl seems like a kind of movie I’d never see in the theater, but would definitely watch if it was on TV.
Only 2000 kids will understand? That’s a pretty small group of people.
Yeah, you’re Australian. Close enough.
Not geographically, but funny-accent-wise.
Uh, guys? The Cop Dog review is broken. I can’t complete my monthly ritual of watching all the Plinkett reviews.
How I Touched Your Mother
What’s a thanksgiving?
The audio seems out of sync. I see “kung fu” mouth.
What a joke-killer. Jesus, Taco, Jesus…
Gone Girl burn!
That string isn’t for her teabag, kids!
You’re giving these hack frauds too much credit.
…. This half baked click bate bullshit? We have a new name for HitB, kiddos!
His wife calls him David Pincher in bed.
“sid vicious / sex pistols retro punk style accent”
Sorry, Palatine already brought the dip, it’s the same kind.
For Gone Girl, I think it’s the thing Jay said; that it reminded him of a dime store trash novel. I haven’t read or seen it, but from the way they’re talking about it, Dan Brown would be a good comparison.
you can talk you lot sound like americans… except for the ones that sound french…
I’m surprised how good you were for how dumb your premise is.
Jay isn’t gay. Gay is Jay.
did she get an answer to the question?
Ben Affleck’s Penis: Uncut?
This was my resolution after Zodiac for all Fincher films. This is actually the only one since then that I’ve been at all interested in.
well its been fun but its raining and i have to go start a really large fire… for safety reasons…
Ha! Don’t worry, Goku, you’ll survive.
Well, if you’re in the correct timeline, anyway.
I’m not one to really get into TV shows. I watched the first episode of Breaking Bad and really enjoyed, but haven’t seen the second episode yet. That was about a year ago now.
Perhaps one day I’ll be more into watching TV shows. I guess, for me, it’s just a lot of time I’d have to put down into one medium of entertainment.
You’re can’t prove or disprove something that’s unfalsifiable.
Hey, you got that advice from me in the RLM comments section!
I know because I sold it to you.
C, eh? N, eh? D, eh?
Was it a flood of Kool-Aid?
Dip? Like from ” Who Framed Roger Rabbit”? Maybe we can dip Jar Jar in it and see what happens.
It’s Monday the 13th here, too, which is Thanksgiving [although I ate the feast on Sunday].
At the end, the background’s a still pic, the water’s live and the house is a postage stamp. My brain melted just a little.
Wild Wild West was about as weird as the weirdest episodes of the TV show, just more expensive weird.
they are my attempts at phonetic spelling of the pronunciation, according to accent of country names.
Thanksgiving? It’s almost Halloween, the favorite holiday for us members of the Graveyard Smash.
Only works on characters painted on cells. 🙁
I like my women like I like my street lights …
The name’s Jesus … Taco Jesus.
That would be funny is there was a typo
It was animated by LucasArts.
Be cool about fire safety.
Is that that Kevin Smith movie?
I want to do the Monster Mash.
Only nerds watch those. (I watch those)
Gone Girl is about a one night stand that never works out, but the guy keeps trying to find this girl that is now gone, but he never does. What a story, Mark.
I never watched Ben Affleck’s dick in gone girl, I don’t know what you’re talkking about.
No that’s Paul Blart: Zoo Cop.
yeah to late….
dont be so homophobic….
killing your father? or is it still to soon?
Damnit, Mike needs to put his guilty pleasure aside and stop apologizing for these stupid horror movies.
he should just admit he jerks off on the Annabelle doll and get over it.
i didnt do it!!! i was here all day!!! back me up!
apparently the Disney star wars sequels are a bit breaking bad…..
spoilers but the Disney star wars sequels are a bit breaking bad…..
didnt mean to post this here… deleted it but thats how guests are made…..
Rich Evans must of been cooking french fries again. This time he choose to throw them outside into the bushes.
“Gone with the Mind”
So Mike and Jay missed out on an “it’s so bad” opportunity?
That’ll teach em to not be so premature over dolls..maybe?
With your dick in it?
So a fleshlight?
hey its baby Rich! http://i.imgur.com/a29L17A.mp4
metal or wood? gas or electric? sodium acrs or fluros?
That’s just silly, you can’t give thanks on Monday. Monday is a day for hatred.
Stop asking logical questions.
It’s the same thing that it isn’t with NotRicks.
I don’t even know what that means.
just cause i is the most hacking fraud in Fraudinton.
i still want to know….
i’m such a fraud thats in MS Paint…..
Lethal obstacles, yet turned on at night?
ILM I have some respect for. Jorge not so much. He’s designed to be that way and we can’t negate the effects.
So…in Gone Girl…she isn’t really gone?
While watching it did you say, “Jesus Dude, she didn’t even kidnap herself?”
Did the Nihilists know where she was?
he will die next year so be nice….
Is this some kind of scheduled event or am I missing something?
i see dead people…
go back to Harvard collage boy!
You’re englis is amasing!!!
Why would it matter if the Empire is circumcised or not?
Oh, wait, it’s not that type of uncut. I got confused with all this talk about Ben Affleck’s penis.
Dang, um ok revised joke:
So Ben Affleck was the director of “Gone Baby Gone”, was the actor of “Gone Girl”, does that mean later he be like the foley artist of a movie called “Gone Woman Gone Gone”?
I hope I’m not among them, because doppelganger
A dozen on every street all exactly the same?
Unless you sit behind a greenscreen drinking coffee while people shout “action” and “cut” for you because you “forget sometimes to do that stuff” that you are there to do.
We live a simple life here, we wake up, jack off to porn, feed the cattle, milk the chickens, hunt for easter eggs in the wild and then get drunk on cider while hanging the local pervert and finish it off with a barn orgy.
So many big feet…
i see what you did there.
picking on spelling and grammar shows a disturbingly sad lack of imagination….
someone start gathering the fucking dragonballs again, and this time leave vageta at home so he doesnt decide to be evil, again, and steal the balls, again, so he can try and be more powerful than goku, again, before realising he needs to work with goku, again, to defeat the real evil guy, again.
I like Ghostbusters 2……frauds.
I thought BB ended perfectly, it tied up all the loose ends (so isn’t lost), Walter got what was coming to him in the end (so isn’t house MD), but he still managed to achieve what he set out to achieve. You get to see Walt doing his thing but it doesn’t get ridiculous.
I actually really love the ending.
colin, the wizard, jessi and rich.
title “whats in the box?”
your username would suggest otherwise.
Barn orgy?? You must be from a different shire! A shame too, it sounds like fun.
Its not so much fun as it is traditional. So many big feet.
Its possible to like disgusting shit.
haha dats kool bro!!!
Now I get it! I did some research and found out that Affleck’s dick is visible in the shower scene. The reason why I missed it was because my eyes were on Rosamund Pike, of course.
See you, Space Fraud
Look, I’m sure when the new Ghostbusters movies comes out, it’ll make Ghostbusters 2 look as good as the first one in comparison to the new one.
Which in turn will make the first look better than Casablanca, Citizen Kane and Gone with the Wind put together. I’m actually expecting that Sight & Sound magazine to declare Ghostbusters “Greatest Film of All Time”, once Ghosbusters 2016 is released.
My take on the Amazing Amy storybook character was to give Amy some motivation for being such a bitch. She had lived her whole life in the shadow of a fictionalized version of herself that her parents created, one who they treated as an idealized version of what their daughter could have been rather than who she was. Whatever Amy did in life, Amazing Amy always did it better. That would no doubt do some psychological damage to a child.
And its ever so realistic that parents would do that right?
Sadly it’s not too hard for me to imagine it, but to be fair the movie isn’t exactly aiming for realism. I’d say it becomes complete satire by the end.
The Amazing Amy backstory is one of those eccentricities that probably works much better in as prose in a novel than it does in a movie.
Wouldn’t simple abuse be a much more realistic reason? Why waste all the effort to come up with the amazing amy bullshit when it only makes it less believable?
This is what I meant in my long post below about her being totally unrealistic in every way possible. It isnt necessary and it doesnt service the story any better than a bog standard rape victim premise would have.
And all the Oscars given away at the 1985 Academy Awards that were given to other movies will all be given to Ghostbusters.
I think Bryan Colangelo nailed it in his comment above.
Jay, I gotta say, Social Network was the least of David Fincher’s talent. I mean how does one try to make a business transaction during dinner seem compelling? And the point of the ending was to show that Nick never really gets to know Amy, we see him talk about that at the beginning and by the end we know what he means. Little does Nick know, Amy is bothered by the fact Amazing Amy will always be golden while the real Amy is dwindling at every moment. The only way (in her mind) to be forever one step ahead of the Amazing Amy is to be a public media icon herself. The movie’s about overachieving in one of the biggest ways possible.
It is abuse.
Imagine a parent telling a child that it is not good enough, every day of its life.
Now, imagine EVERYONE ELSE doing the same, by showing disappointment that the real child is not the same as fantasy child up to the point that the real child actually grows up.
Now add to that years of other kids bullying the “amazing” child.
And the books just keep on coming… and coming…
Here’s what happens when parents stop after 2 books and 2 poems. Read the article, the title is a bit misleading, trying to give the whole story a happy ending despite everything that happened along the way.
As for the movie…
It’s a very useful service to the story. Several actually.
First off, it eliminates all money issues along the way.
Characters don’t have to worry about money to solve their problems – i.e. Amy can sit on her ass for months and plan the whole thing out AND she can simply purchase all she needs to disappear, paying with cash… she can afford to be untraceable.
Then, she is famous. But not a celebrity.
So, no fans on the lawn 24/7, peeking through the windows while she’s bleeding herself or stocking woodsheds up with expensive items, or to testify that she is actually a colossal bitch.
But the moment she disappears… BAM!
It’s not a woman but a bellowed character that is missing.
Think Emma Watson being “gone” like that.
And there’s more!
Parents get to be genuine victims – TWICE.
First, when she disappears.
Then, again, when the audience realizes that she gave no thought to hurting them by staging the whole thing.
Audience gets to hate those stuck up rich people, and then feel sorry for them – and in turn hate crazy Amy even more.
That way, no guilt is shifted to parents, audience feels guilt for blaming the parents – and Amy is now not just a psycho but a monster.
On a subtext level, it leaves audience asking themselves, did her parents know (subconsciously or not) that she was a psycho and did they invent the “amazing” version of their daughter as a coping mechanism.
Was she crazy manipulative from the get go?
Is her hate for Amazing Amy real?
You can’t get all that from a “bog standard rape victim premise”.
I dont feel like getting into another argument with you about this. You make some good points and I dont have anything to come back with on it because I have already emptied every part of my opinion on this movie twice over, I literally have nothing else to say about it until I have watched it, if i watch it.
Tall, thin, and bright.
It’s like poetry …
I am dead people, five of them stitched together like Frankenstein, but unlike Frankenstein I was sewn together wrong, my arms and legs got swapped, my nose was lost and they replaced it with a penis and finallly I eat by shoving food into a hole in my stomach and shit out of my mouth.
I call myself, fuckerstein the third.
I’ll defend my joke thusly: I was not highlighting a mistake on your end but rather acting as if I misread your comment in ignorance, then drew a conclusion from my misreading.
You know, like how Mr. Plinkett calls Obi-Wan actor ‘Ewan MacDonald’.
Oh, sorry, I thought you did watch it.
Well, I didn’t spoil much more than Mike and Jay already did.
You didn’t spoil anything that other people hadn’t already spoiled by my request, dont worry about a thing 🙂
Scroll down. I was using “late to the party” as a metaphor for “this was already posted”.
Wattarya awn aboot, budday?
I want Jillian to come back for a HiTB episode where a film like Annabelle is featured. Then we can watch Mike squirm as Jillian rips him a new asshole about how illogical it is to like this genre unabashedly.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. That’s your new schtick.
I take it JillianxJay is your OTP
Just Jillian and Jay’s beard.
Uh, excuse me, the shipping is called Jayllian, thank you very much. Check your facts!
They can be helpful but can also damage your car?
“Oh my god, I have to go; my cat’s fucking my fleshlight.”
Frankenstein was the scientist, not the monster.
And off in the morning?
… She’s gotta be named Annabelle.
Why is everybody booing?
It should’ve been that way in the first place. I mean, Amadeus… Pfft! Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good movie, but it is no Ghostbusters. 😀
good point, I am a hack fraud.
I don’t give a damn about your OTP. Only RichXWiseau matters to me. That shit is like SpikeFaye to me.
Jillian broke up with Jay, Domo.
You’re totally not gay…
How do you know that? Hey! I said how do you that? Did you read the script? What’s that on the ground there? Is that the script?
Not in his head canon, you fucker.
What are you talking about? Ghostbusters 2 is a fine movie. Remember the painting of Vigo and the baby carriage scene. I give it 5 childs-homework goldstars and to contin….. what….a doll movie?
“They did a fine job writing a hack script”
“The sowing machine was kind of scary” -Mike Stokasa
I think Mike has a Bagul problem going on in his brain.
There is a penis now?
I’m buing that 4k plasmascreen and screw this VHS crap, I’m going to get that new DaViDa technology.
But Nass old buddy, we had holographic projecters back in our old galaxy, so screw DeVaDes!
It also makes you wonder how many Razzies the new Ghostbusters is gonna “win”.
I’m aware there will be stiff competition, but the new Ghostbusters is a lock for “Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-off or Sequel”. Other bad sequels might come out that year, but there’s no way they are stealing the award from Ghostbustes.
Also, I’m just checking previous winners of such an “honor”, and1999 is not listed. I’m trying to thing which movie from 1999 would deserve it. Hmmm…
Maybe you should buy a curved TV to have a more immersive penis viewing experience.
I love how Mike calls it “HARur”.
Oh yea. That thing. I ah guess I just forgot.
Btw, I hate those things. It always ads an extra chin.
You always looked so good in hologram form. Old and wrinkly. Like a leathery corpse. Always gave those kids a scare round Chistmas.
B A’s HD P in 3d. Could be worth an extra buck.
What Is This Half-Baked Click-Bait Bullshit?
In other words, you have no pilot’s license. How do you still not have your own beer commercial?
It’s enough to make Will Lyman drink Lysol.
“When he asked his graceless nation for a favour, government satellites turned on their collective axes, then did a synchronous spit take…into the sun. The Hubble Space Telescope scoured the deepest folds of its Deep Field for a thousand solar eclipses…then looked into them. Celebrity impersonator Brian Greene spun Isaac Newton in his grave that very Halloween, then refused to remove his costume, declaring, ‘But these are my pajamas’…and Charlie Rose let him.
He is…not this man.”
Stay thirsty, you wingless, halo-less…”new” home owner.
I am thankful that I’m not Canadian
I hope they’re going to have crazy adventures out on the sea now.
Isn’t Kevin Smith that talking walrus that died in the 90s?
Jay’s gay, baby. Jay’s gay.
Baby Jay is Gay?
People liked The Cube? o_O
if you believe people are born that way.(gay)
thanks for reminding me why I fucking hate Star Wars
They got away with using the same damn poem for 20 fucking years.
Can’t you just make some friends already?
I tried… 🙁
I failed… :'(
Then ask them for your money back
I’d rather sail in a sea of dicks than watch another fuckin’ vampire movie.
I never knew what the pound sign was for and I still don’t know what hashtags are for.
That little symbol needs to fuck off!
Their reviews have always lacked consistency. That is part of what makes these guys so funny.
Value of a penis is represented in pennies.
It is appropriately homophonic, it makes the whole thing seem larger than it is and it is easily converted into cents.
I believe that, since the Scottish referendum, the proper term is cis-Gaelic.
Stephen King had an expose on the fuckaroo in “Dreamcatcher”, summed up here.
As long as they don’t end up in space. Once a series moves into space, it’s a clear indicator that the shark has been officially jumped.
It has a name…
*coughs* space cop *coughs*
That’s different. Space Cop started in space. The future of space to be specific.
It’s a battleground for X’s and O’s.
You know it’s not to late for Mister Plinkett to review the Rob Zombie’s Halloweens!
It’s ok Jay, just tell Mike that you think Breaking Bad is incredibly depressing and overrated. Granted, his face may split in half as he screeches and claws at your face like most BB fans. But this is a battle that must be fought so people will shut up about this fucking show.
what are you talking about breaking bad is the best after twin peaks. Just because you cant appreciate how awesome it is doesn’t mean jay cant either. He even said he liked what he has seen of it so, in short fuck you and grow a decent sense of taste.
Maybe in the next episode they’ll literally jump a giant shark and go into space.
But Howard the Duck!
Howard the Duck is a NATIONAL TREASURE!!!
I got the joke after a while and I chuckled. A fine crafted joke.
Speaking of craftmanship have you seen Prometheus?
Classic Game Room HD is broadcasted from space and its the best its ever been.
Isn’t that Nicholas Cage?
No. Cage hunts national treasures. He’s looking for Howard the Duck because he’s certain the Duck and his career are in the same place.
Sadly, yes. I did saw it.
“coarse” Like sand?
how is calling a story depressing indication of it’s quality? what if that’s the fucking point?
Still better love stories than Twilight.
So is this gonna be a water-based version of ‘Up’?
I have such wonderful things to show you.
Saying Breaking Bad is overrated is like saying Jay will shave his beard. It’s not possible and if it is we will kill someone over it.
He should yell at his wife, then.
The point of “Amazing Amy” was that it was an idealized version of who Amy was, presented to the public who assumes that was what her life was really like, when she was a completely different person entirely. While a large part of the thematic content deals with public perception and the way the media manipulates information, in a more general sense it is about the facades that people put on for each other, i.e., life as performance art. By writing those books about Amy, her parents were, in effect, manipulating her public persona.
Remember when people used to call Temple of Doom “the crappy one”?
Maybe they’ll go to space where they’ll encounter aliens who make a young clone of Fake Plinkett. The clone then gets sent to the future of space, where he becomes…
its RLM so probably more like waterworld crossed with sharknado
thats a depressing thought…
go back to watching glee then.
its the future of sPAAAACe. to be phonetic…
they are making more twin peaks…
Every time the show is hosted by Blip, the video quality is jerky, like Mike and Jay are stop-motion puppets. I mean, I know that Mike and Jay ARE stop-motion puppets, but they usually do a good job of hiding it.
I changed my face. Insert your jokes
If only someone cared
You forgot 1 through 998.
Did you fall in love with your computer who has a woman’s voice?
I’ve retired from acting.
other people did them for me… (admittedly i made comments 994-998 as well for the joke.)
are you using a new moisturizer? you look younger!
i fucked up and did it already…. insert premature ejaculation jokes here.
Jesus called, he said you can keep the beard.
i’m trying! i’m sure i can get a joke up, insert viagra joke here….
i’m going to stop now because i look like an arse. insert… yeah maybe not….
My two cents on the beard issue: Not a facial hair fan myself, but looks
good when its post-stubble short/very trim or entirely gone. Bushy beard
not so sexy. (No hobo) Yeah, I don’t really care- I just care more about the beard “issue” than EITHER of these movies.
What the hell kind of hospital doesn’t wash off blood before they send a patient home?
look at your hair bushy boy!
i had a hippy girl friend that didnt shave…. sideways you pic reminds me of her…..
and the lice!
My face is on the poster. Why wouldn’t it?
i laughed to hard an snot came out my nose!
You’re making it feel weird…
Dandenong. they also left the bloody clamps used to close an artery when i was admitted on a hook on the wall the whole time i was there.
you lined up a bunch of comebacks when you decided to change your face didnt you?
i had to go search for this!
what the lice?
Well, I uh, don’t have any lice…
sorry as the only “man WITH a face.” i have to talk big about faces.
you do know this is live zach… i mean wizz.
I’m sure that nothing is in my beard
Was it SOS Jesus?
so how many Valium did you take zach?
Zach? I-uh-don’t know what you’re talking about…
damn thats the joke i was trying to remember.
sorry stupid wizard i was talking to someone else.
*takes sip of your coffee* Okay…
That’s a lot of cum
BOOM!!! and wizards new face wins the internet!
i drink tea… sorry about the taste sir… shall i fetch you a coffee?
are you eating babies? i know stem cells are a thing but you know what the poLICE said last time….
what in your face?
i wish i had thought of that 2 hours ago….
yeah but do you want a coffee? stay on topic!
fine… i will make you a coffee! was that so hard?!!! now say please….
Fuck man, keep the topic back to what it was!
wait what was it?… oh yeah… jokes about you!
Saddam Hussein thinks you look stupid!
Saddam Hussein died in 2006, you annoying little-*phone rings* Hold on*answer phone* It’s P-diddy this will take a while
I was a bear once. He could’ve had lice
tell him to say hi to tupac
HEY SHUT UP! I’M ON THE PHONE! *goes back to phone* Sorry, Diddy, andrew was being an ass again.
come on man dont play me like that in front of diddy. now i’ll never be the shizzel…. sad face…
stop typing man. dont CAP me!
I’ll call you back, Diddy *closes phone* What the fuck, man? Diddy is helping me through and through with music. Do you want to fuck this up?
no. i’m just bored….
Get the fuck out then, god.
face it wizzer you loved it. xoxox
just to take the heat off you i will right now go out side and take a pic…
hey Stupid Wizard! to make up for all the jokes you can choose my new profile pic…
None of the pill bottles on the table fell during the earthquake. Come on, guys, get it together.
I vote for D)
did i do it right?
“Thats a nasty gash”
name that movie!
I think people are getting a bit to obsessed with what jay does with his own face, its his fucking face its his fucking decision. leave him alone to be his own fucking person.
This conversation is difficult to follow, does anyone have a road map?
Its fine for me, your computer sucks.
dont worry ill congratulate you. congratulations.
only 700 more to go for me XD
When you say bear…do you mean bigfoot.
im on to you.
Don’t worry Ive been making a list and checking it twice.
I would watch that.
I am well aware, i ruined five pairs of pants before i stopped cumming buckets.
Riding a shark into space, i like it. sounds like the start to a magical adventure.
prequels are always terrible. except the ones that aren’t.
Penis monsters, always try and touch penis monsters whenever you see them. penis monsters are people too, just look at adam sandler.
you suck for not watching rich evans!
yousa needsa hologramaphic adjustementa. meesa talka to da technicalis supportes for yousa tomorrow.
Why did you burn your house down?
You are assuming its his house.
all of the razzies. all of them. Even the ones that were given to other movies in the past. unless adam sandler has something coming out at the same time.
Who else would live in the middle of the fucking woods?
i live here…. the joke is i really took that photo, in Moe.
crazy people!. oh wait you mean me…. oh….
A bear. the question is, would a bear shit in the woods while its on fire.
Wait, is it its house or his house? I’m so confused…
a koala bear died from the smoke and shat its self… does that count?
I can see it in your eyes.
you would have to ask taco.
i dont consider my self human so “it” is appropriate….
they aren’t mine. i found them in a hospital…
the really funny thing this is closer to the neighbors house than mine…..
Cube was innovative and interesting as a concept. The sequel however was fucking terrible.
i just looked at them…. i cant argue with your logic.
Then how does my ex wife haunt me?
And no one has mentioned chucky at all.
All of you calm your fucking shit down, you know your just cheap imitations of the British. Accept your overlords gracefully and continue using OUR language as your own.
I am going to say, yes, yes that counts.
I was never confused, and I realize no one on this site will get that reference but fuck you im using it anyway.
looks like something you would see in an evil dead movie, i like it.
Were there any cassette tapes or strange books in the basement when you moved in?
Damn im on fire today, get it? on fire? lololol
have you been to Moe? you wouldnt joke about it if you had!
I dont know what moe is im afraid. I spend most of my time sipping tea and eating crumpets while scoffing at the commoners.
(this comment is such a lie)
i lived there and i cant explain Moe….
this is a article about the town of Moe.
its runs house!
The past tense would explain the access to a computer.
Do you suppose he mentioned thinking about shaving specifically to prompt feedback? Maybe not. As I said, I only care about this compared to GONE GIRL. “Fuck”
FACIAL hair doesn’t grow out of the head. And my hair is short atm. I comment on these maybe once or twice a year.
I think he mentioned it to make omitted cry to be honest, but i might be wrong.
You must number them all or it doesn’t count.
1115: fine but it will look weird if only i’m doing it.
it needs to be in tree format.
to be fair it made no sense at the time….
you had time to post that but kept the shaggy profile… you love the shagg! now imagine the shagg is under your face… close your eyes and think… feel the beard….
the octomom porno!
Close but no potato.
again, don’t care. i don’t like facial hair, don’t care about other people’s faces if they aren’t touching mine. it was (i felt,from the review) a solicited opinion and I chimed in. I refer to Jay as ‘the cute scruffy one” and I think he looks good in a beard… just a very short,trimmed one. It got a bit shaggy for MY tatses. Not sure he’s exactly trying to pander to gay guys twice his age he’s never met. Hope not. That would make him a crazy person.
is it a porno? if not sex in the city… that was full of cunts! and nudity as well….
“Not sure he’s exactly trying to pander to gay guys twice his age he’s never met.”
not sure who you mean because you look 12 and i’m not gay… they said i wasnt clean enough, and cant dance, and have no sense of fashion…. they were so mean!!!
no! now i have no face!!! are you happy now!?
this is taking to long next vote wins A,B,C?
You must finish what you started, or it will all be for naught.
1127: with great dickishness come great responsibility….
ok ok my real choice is a)
It was a movie reviewed here on this site.
oh wait this isnt a joke and i have to think,,,, mesa fucked!
you bastard!!! i hate that one!!! i wanted c… or b would have been funny!
in soviet Moe computer posts you!
I meant c) they are listed back to front
your vague clues are not helping!!!! witch galaxy!????
1137: nicht alles.
Hence all the numbering now.
Koalas aren’t bears.
1140… yeah. thanks….
1141: we should do a comic, you could teach me numbers and Lucasfarts can FUCK UP MY FACE!!!!
These comments are all over the place haha, yes more than usual.
I blame Andrew.
Are you gonna come home and eat chicken and rice?
1144: you would.
1145: sully has a plan to make it all make sense….
No one cares especially me since I’ve retired from acting
shame…cause B) was for you… you know, if you cared…
1148: but they love cuddles… if you see one hug it!
Yeah but I don’t care
You don’t want to prank call a koala. They all got koala ID.
Saddam was hung in 2006.
Now… not so much, as I hear.
what if its a gay male koala bear?
No im going to shit in peoples mouths.
can you officially not care so that i can have any face i want?
1156: sorry that was 1155:
I have reported this post to the feds……you racist.
Cage is a national treasure in and of himself.
By that I mean that he can coppolate with himself to make more Cage.
Sister: Mom wants you to come in and help fix dinner.
Brother: Why? Is it broken?
Thank u, that’ll be all.
They can call it “Drop”.
But it might be confusing cause there is already a bestiality-themed movie with that name.
Unfortunately, it looks more like this when it happens.
meesa givsa no fucksa aboutes feds, yousa needs moi moi calm, meesa give yousa valioomsi.
1146: you posted that like its not something i see every day….
this is bajillions times more deadly than a rattle snake and i put it in the bucket!
1165: they all have chlamydia!!! stop fucking koalas perverts!
Stop with the Ben Affleck’s Penis jokes.
I’m 40. And I don’t think what I said was that unclear. Had nothing to do with you, the comments were regarding Jay and said beard.
1167?: never! i love penis!
i know Jay has a beard but who is she?!
These sandwiches have become soggy, can you dry them?
1171: insert soggy biscuit joke here….
*insert witty retort concerning your mother*
*insert single word comment that implies the above comment was incendiary in nature*
*insert overly long response backpedaling while trying to pretend you were the one that did something wrong*
*insert 3 letter acronym which implies an outburst response of humorous noise, when in truth I merely exhaled through my nose a little more sharply than normal*
That’s because koalas are cheaper and more willing than the call girls.
It’s the invisible hand of the meerkat.
They did mention Child’s Play, but I am not a fan of those.
Someone’s not being cool about fire safety.
Did you have an allergic reaction to a cat or something?
It was probably chable Jesus.
I was wrong its night beast, made by the same director and almost the exact same film.
You should do a Half in the Bag for the movie Birdman. I’m hearing really good things about it.
Oh shit, you’re 40? I’ve a feeling the glasses make you seem more youthful because they enlarge your eyes a bit.
I agree with you. Jay’s beard being trimmed and well-kempt is a good look on him, I think. Too shaggy would look odd. If my facial hair came in thicker, I’d also be going with a rather short, well-kempt beard.
1186: Mike has officially proclaimed that startrek 3 is “Pathetic.”
1187 rich said about “space cop.”
“people have no idea how bad this movie will be.”
Genital Warts the Movie would be a better love story than Twilight.
Mike’s British lady voice is the best thing ever.
wow, i thought i missed the doll appearing in the background, but i noticed right when it showed up
1191: no, its just a reaction to super heated tea-tree and eucalyptus oil.
for fun kids you too can make this face at home! go to a drug store and buy tea-tree oil and eucalyptus oil and poor them in your eyes.
Can everything in Australia kill you or what?!
some of the sheep are o.k? but even most of them are dangerous. for specifics see: Real Life: Australia in this post.
1195: this is fire safety in action. we call it a “fuel reduction burn.”
1196: also i have a firetruck!
That’s what he said.
1198: sorry to break my own rules but i need to change my profile to inspire fear in people who unlike RLM fans have no brains.
Why haven’t you posted in the Halloween commentary thread?
4 years of Half in the Bag and I still haven’t seen a single movie that they’ve reviewed.
My name you get a lot of comments.
1202: been burning stuff.
The player doesn’t start. I couldn’t watch this videos the day it went online and I can’t watch it now. But everything else. I’m not interested in the reason, I just want to watch it eventually.
How could Mike be so hard on Gone Girl but so apologetic towards Annabelle? I get that the plot for Gone Girl’s a bit unbelievable, and kinda trashy, but did he seriously not understand what it was really about?
Poor Jay. First Jack, now Mike has lost his mind trying to explain movies. I can see the next BotW going like this;
Jay: The Super Mario Brothers movie was a terrible movie despite it’s cast and production budget.
Rich: I eat poop.
Jack:Ha ha ha…ha…ha…ha.
Woah, spoilers for Breaking Bad!
But it was still a boring movie with no payoff at the end. Interesting idea, but horrible execution.
Mike is, in a sense, retarded.
REVIEW TUSK! Please!
Has everyone just forgotten about the plinket reviews now? I think the last one was in 1955 when plinket was just a sprightly young 7177691268 year old. Fond memories.
Everyone. I have an important anouncement! Jesus loves you all!
Give Jesus your heart and let him eat it. mmmmmm, tasty capillaries.
Aw, I hate cliff hangers.
Love the Dragon’s Milk cameo.
Rosamund Pike was tremendous in Gone Girl. I’d argue she carried Jack Reacher pretty well too. Don’t know what it is about her, but I find her incredibly attractive as well.
Yezzus guys, your attempts at comedy are pure shit, just stick to the discussion
You must HATE RLM
yep! they are hack frauds!
i think you may have miss read the comment.
Nah, I read it fine
ok… then i have no idea what your talking about.
hope you dont get paid in rubles… no one wants that shit…..
so what can you buy with rubles?… half a turnip that vladimeire putin pissed on?
it’s also spelt Nagh
Well, after finally getting around to watching Gone Girl, I came back here to watch what Mike and Jay said about the film. It seems I find myself agreeing with both Mike and Jay.
I appreciated the performances, the pacing of the film, and I was really digging the story they had set up. I enjoy Fincher’s directing style and felt it enhanced the material. Then, like Mike mentions, nearing the latter half on the film this setup begins to crumble and the we don’t get the payoffs that we thought were being setup.
Amy Dunne got incredibly sloppy by going to her ex and murdering him. I was hoping the female detective would at least start piecing together the clues, which we glimpse slightly when she questions Amy briefly in the hospital, but then her character just exits the film with a shrug. “Sorry, pal. I can’t help you.”
I agree with Jay that the story most likely continues after the film ends and that’s how I, myself, viewed it. I needed to adopt that or else I’d be incredibly angry with the ending. With that said, I felt they should have at least given a hint that Amy might somehow be undone by either Nick or the detective after the movie ends, or at least something to make the audience feel satisfied with the ending.
It breaks some of my suspension of disbelief that Amy would be that sloppy yet get away with it. Wouldn’t people investigate what happened at her ex’s place? I mean, if they looked into his movements and his phone calls they would probably find that he met with her at that casino. It’s just rather ridiculous.
I still felt it was a good film, but it could have used some rewriting near the end. Other aspects of the film were either good or top-notch.
PS – I didn’t even notice Ben Affleck’s penis. It wasn’t until midway through the shower scene that I thought, “Oh, wait, I must have missed when they and the commenters were talking about.” It was probably because I was trying to see Rosamund Pike. “SHOW US SOME NIPPLE!”
As I said, you’re clearly not one of the RLM fans, you fucking ass burns so hard the smoke can be seen from Russia) You can come suck Vladimir Putin’s cock, while I wipe my ass with dollar, cause nobody uses this shit, cool boys have their Euros)
Yeah, but their shit’s better than most.
your epic funny. speak more of your genius.
just a few points… i’m not american so i dont give a fuck what you do to their money, its is spelt arse not ass you arse and everyone knows vladamir putin is dickless.
I don’t know man, your retarded speech tells that you’re ideal American, some of your ancestors must be one of them. You should think of moving! As for Vlad, I don’t know… guess you used your teeth when you mumbled on him. Or you couldn’t get him up with your ugly face, and now you’re jealous…
so you are admitting that vlad is dickless?
I admit that faggot like you would know better
your not even trying any more, are you tired?
I don’t have to try, you shit all over yourself just fine without any help)
…Wait a minute, that pathetic shit that you wrote was you TRYING?? Oh god, this is hilarious))
even more boring than the last. have you lost your bile duct?
I guess you misunderstanding who’s amusing who, clown) I’m very disappointed with the shortness of your retarded reply, go on again about Vlad’s dick, that seems to turn your fantasy on!
thats better. keep up the good work. but vlad has no dick.
What did I tell you about the shortness clown?
seriously though, now i cant stop imagining you as the “shortness clown”.
now forever in my mind your a tiny angry russian clown humping vlads leg..
Clown gets defensive, he tries to go against the rules! Nice)
Yeees, good clown! I knew Vlad turns you on! One mention and retarded comments are back on)
there are rules?
no its just fun to say he is dickless.
Or it’s fun to think about his dick? You’re confused
i am the one saying he is dickless you keep mentioning graphic sexual things about him. i dont now how you keep imagining such things…
Cause your idea of fun revolves around a dick, but you’re too scared of coming out. Come on, your case is clear, it would be much funnier if I had gay clown instead of the simple one!
you seem really obsessed with talking about dicks.
Why u in denial?(((
why are you obsessed with cocks and homosexuality? did your mother spank you to hard?
I find faggots amusing, and you’re the funniest yet!
yeah and you back to not trying. did the thought of your mother spanking you turn you on to much to think?
I saying the truth, you’re the funniest faggot ever with some astonishing complexes! And are you saying again that your attempt at insulting my family is your idea of trying? And you say you’re not funny, come ooon)
close. but it lacks spark.
Are you giving your professional opinion on my posts?)) LMAO You’re a genius clown! MORE!
talk to you again soon you shortness clown
C’mon swallowing clown, don’t run away! It’s so pathetic even for you!
Apparently the film was more satisfying then the book (in it she not only gets away with it but also her fake diary is made public and people actually think Nick tried to kill her).
But I agree, it’s stupid that once her story collapses the police just drop it because “public opinion” already has a set narrative and it can’t be changed. Except that we live in a world where terrible things about sympathetic celebrities are revealed all the time.
it took you that long to figure it out…
snuffy where are you? did your mum ground you?… or did your region or russia trade its internet for magic beans?
Oh year, I forgot about my ass clown! Start your sharades!
Yeah same, though I disagree about being disappointed that the film didn’t fall into cookie cutter tropes…I’ll see what Mike and Jay have to say and then make some joke post paralleling the constant whining that goes on over at “pre-rec”…provided they said anything negative about the movie at all.
Oh and I did see Ben Afleck’s cock.
I dunno why they sold it as a mystery…(oh wait yes I do) but because
of those marketing assholes I put off watching these hacks rip apart a
better than decent thriller flick.
In my personal opinion (keeping
in mind that I am a total Fincher Cock-boy) I thought it was a decent
flick, well acted, paced and (of course) beautifully filmed. I didn’t
love the story, though I thought the surprises (Amy’s lies NOT crashing
down around her, finding that Nick was just as complicit in creating the
hell they were both damned to) to be refreshing and enjoyable. There
were some other things I liked about the writing, but its really tough
to pull yourself into a story framed around two passionately u
sympathetic characters …even if they went against my own expectations
and made me uneasy, which was obviously the whole point. Okay now I
Okay real quick Jay and Mike, the purpose for the
“Perfect Amy” stories was to establish in the viewers mind a pattern of
victimhood and to highlight the character as flawed but relate-able/ Interesting to point out this is one of the very few times I’ve found myself agreeing more with Mike than with Jay, but moth made valid points I thinks.
I didn’t see annabelle and from the looks of it it’s exactly as I expected. Which means I will never check it out.
Also you hacks always hate everything your review and just because movies aren’t your thing and you’d all rather be playing videogames doesnt give your carte blanc to just be haters all the time. You’re supposed to like the same things I like.
No! review Laser Mission!
We get it, you’re an ozzy…
it is spelt arse! you are fucking stupider than i thought.
oy oy oy!
Why isn’t there a spoiler skip timecode? 🙁
WELL DONE SHORTNESS CLOWN! it only took 4 days but you have figured it out. xoxo
First, its not even a mystery…in fact just guessing you probably already know the “spoiler” second…good flicks hold up…while I admit to having the same fears…a good movie will be a good movie even if you know the “spoilers”… All that said…just go out and buy a ticket to the movie already…they both recommended
Great, ass clown! Your retarded notions on spelling are amuzing! Btw, is that you? http://img291.imageshack.us/img291/4196/1292431494562.jpg
I din’t figure out anything, I just didn’t give a shit… But I’ll play along, you keep telling yourself what you want and I’ll laugh my ass off!
russia is in europe.
i’m not european.
Russia is both in europe and in Asia, my imbecile jester!
Where do they make such degenerates then?
russia mostly…. mostly.
“russia is asia”?
Nah, you can’t be Russian, we don’t like faggots, as you may have heard, so it’s a failed attempt. Where are you from?
You’re retarded beyond hilarity) So, where is that degenerate cesspit you call “motherland” situated?
when you learn better english syntax i will… nagh i will just keep fucking with you.
also why do you end your sentence’s with a “)” cant russia afford periods?
nice edit. saved an otherwise lackluster performance.
you type so slow.
Lackluster performance was your parents motto, I’m afraid)
unlike russia’s motto…
Slower than you brain?
hey? i dont get it?
How much shit did you have for breakfast today?
What a surprise)
i cant afford breakfast i get paid in rubles.
Shit is free for you
WHY U SO SLOW??
seriously? can you really not afford a full stop.
here i will donate some to you…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………. now you dont have to end each sentence like a retard.
its not me. its russias decrepit dial-up internet. it makes things look slow.
AAAAAAAAA))))) When you talk about grammar it’s too funny))))
Also, which retarded fuckwit donated sperm to your mother?
yeah and so are rubles. its not like people would pay for them.
What is dial up? Is that what you use in your third world country?
its not grammar. its punctuation.
Is that note to yourself?
yeah because unlike you i’m not pre-mature.
Well one ruble worth more than your mother!
Yeah, you’re underdeveloped)
please we have all seen your mother.
Nah you didn’t
yet you still cant grasp the most basic principle of all eropean languages…………………………………………………………………….
god you take ages!
Well not all of us were made in 4 seconds behind the trashcan!
thats not what your mum told me….
Yet you never even heard of capital letters)
Yeah, my mom probably told you she has no change)
seriously though. you cant win because you, live in russia… no one with a brain would live in russia.
you live in russia!!!!
No one with a brain would live in England)
its not my fault that your 1 cent whore mother couldnt make change of 5 cents.
Edit^ in the shit end of england!
totally agree! i would bomb the shit out of those pommie bastards!
Not all mothers are whores like yours, don’t hate the world cause you are degenerate!
Ran out of ideas, jester?
you live in england?
the syntax of your comment makes no sense.
God you take CENTURIES!
I live in the best place on Earth)
no i just hate the english.
so you dont live in russia then.
Your writing told that a long time ago)
Only retards can say that about Russ… Oh wait!
ages are longer than century’s. its hard trolling in a second language isnt it.
And you stopped making sence) Oh wait, you never started…
“Your writing told that a long time ago)” hahahahaha are you trying to be me or did you really think that is good english?
in your mum!
yes i did.
so you are 12
are you tired shortness clown?
You didn’t understand shit, did you?)
Yeah, you’re getting kinda boring, ass clown…
Why you call your father my mother? Is that a way to get back at me for your butthurt?
Is that you?
My mom delivers people far superior to you. Let’s try again. Where were degenerate like you born? Don’t answer “on the sidewalk”, it’s not a location!
you have always been boring, stupid and russian. but i try not to hold it against you.
have you seen you? your mothers work is like all russan made stuff. cheap, shoddy and probably drunk.
And only the latter is true about me, cause you owning the former two! Like a boss! See, you good at something!
Ah… That’s it? that’s all you can do? Describe your own family and pin it on Russians? Booooring…
Your writing told me that a long time ago.
No, see, those are letters, I’m really surprised that you know them, but it’s not what I asked
yeah but at the end of the day your still russian! even the Chinese laugh at you!!!
Chinese are just retarded. They laugh at everything. Just like you.
Да ты слился, хуесос.
see what i mean. your always russian. no matter what you could never win. i could have ebolAids. and i would still be happier than any russian could ever dream of.
so your racist, homophobic, stupid and russian… sorry that last one is just repeating the first few.
That’s cause you’re retarded, as I said. Nothing to do with happiness.
no matter what you say russia is still the arsehole of the world.
Your country is, just because you live in it)
you dont even know where it is because your to stupid to take a hint.
Да ты просто слившийся хуесос, которого рожали жопой
Nah, it’s because I don’t even wanna know, sorry
see! you dont eve have real letters! how stupid are you cunts?
You’re like a monkey that’ve learnt a few words. I guess that’s offensive to monkeys, though…
Таким выблядкам как ты просто не дано знать настоящие языки
that is the weakest insult you have come out with yet.
Weakest insults are your prerogative, I don’t go on your territory
If i was a dirty brown bread, i wouldnt be a galah about it.
Видишь, ты просто беспомощный сблёв, который ни хуя не может. Ты слился по жизни.
i’m going to miss you when you get cancel from chernobyl.
Well, you failed to amuse me today. I suggest you take a day off, come up with some stuff and be a clown you really are. You supposed to be good at something, right? Right now, you just boring. So long, keep trying!
bla blabla! dsjh bla bal.
by troll! nice to see you any time. xoxox
Некоторые люди — и я в их числе — не переносят счастливых концов
Ahahahahaaa what a pathetic attempt)) You’re getting amuzing again! Trying to master Google translate?
no just cut and pasted gibberish. i assumed you could understand because you always talk gibberish. you rougeseppo stubbie dicked shelia.
just wondering how many russians did the germans kill? 20-30 million?
my world is fire. anything that cant kick you to death is so poisonous that you will wish something would kick you to death to stop the pain. the sky kills us, the land kills us, the water kills us and is full of sharks! we love it. its the best place in the world!
Snuff Snuff andrew thompson • 4 hours ago
Nah, it’s because I don’t even wanna know, sorry
how many times di you ask?
hahahaa a russian called someone else third world! the sure sign of someone who has never left the sewer.
but you said
Snuff Snuff andrew thompson • 4 hours ago
Nah, it’s because I don’t even wanna know, sorry
russia does not even have the balls to take all of the Ukraine. your just pissing on the border. because you know NATO would beat you into the ground b4 your clockwork radar saw anything….
now i feel bad. you used to be cool russia. now your gayer than glitter….
are you really that stupid?
you keep talking troll. who are you?
that was your comeback? no wonder you are losing this.
He is right. learn to fucking use English!
Have you heard of syntax?
you are the one who said their mother couldn’t make change. how poor are you?
Yes, it’s you)
You’re retarded clown
You’re just retarded clown
Actually that gibberish is better than what you normally talk like) See how retarded you are?
Not as many times Russians pissed in your mouth
Also I don’t wanna know how many times Russians raped your mother
Also, Russian took a long shit on your faggot country that’s why you so upset
Have you heard of capital letters?
I am so rich your mother can suck me for her lifetime if I give her my daily salary
AOh, you started using other accounts now? You’re beyond fagginess)
Are you really that stupid?
your shit life is not my problem… so i can laugh at it.
See? You’re an idiot. When you were born the whole nursery laughed
there are so many russian clowns… who first?
People from Chernobyl speak better than you, and they have radiation there, that damages their brain… I see, no radiation can have such effect on you. Cause you were born already retarded
like your mum?
that clown raped your mother. That was his best joke
Выблядок снова атакует)
i would trade 1.5 million dead germans for 20-30 million of you cowards.
Look I found you
Look I found yours
nagh. just shows how little you understand. there is only a billion or so people who can tell you what i said.
No, cause nobody gives a shit about you. They just take a shit on you. Like me. And Russians. And even your countrymen. Why? Nobody likes faggots. You spread aids.
look i found you!!!
Look I found you!
you found what? there is nothing here.
You so retarded you can’t even see
Noo that’s your mother again. And here’s her with make up
thats it batteler keep that grave warm.
Сблёву нет покоя
hahaha is you angry little dwarf shortness clown… rape jokes are a bit angry.
but with out rape there would be no russia. so much german DNA….
You failed again. Nothing you say do you any good, you just look stupider every time. You cesspit degenerate family is proud of you. And I’m bored again.
your mother was a russian Olympic swimmer…. she raped your father with her 6 inch clitoris!!!!
so russia still cant use big boy letters… thats ok. china will show you… real soon.
really? “what you say is what you are!” have you descended to that point?
see the link you posted 5 minutes after i asked the question… your clockwork internet needs winding.
Stole my phase to use against me? Boring. You’re dwarf shortness faggot clown. See how easy it is? Your stupid little mind can’t think of something funny
You just can’t think of something funny. I am bored.
That’s what you keep doing. Boring.
Pathetic. Your cesspit country probably overrun by smelly chinese and their food. Not that it smells worse than your house
but you still dont know where it is. its so sad that a troll like you cant make the basic effort.
like you just did?
So you post dozen comments after one of mine, then say that it’s wrong? You just keep blowing it.
Like you just did
It’s third world, figuring it out would be like digging into shit. I’m comfortable in my first world apartment. And you think that you can troll me from your gutter? So pathetic, you’re blowing it again.
what is funny about your insane third world ranting. call me back when you get phones.
i dont have to try. i live here!
Print: “Like you just did” RTS
you do know no one in the real world will ever click on a .Ru. page. your all thieves.
We invented phones. You blew it again. Gosh, you suck so hard…
hahahahahah!!! you really think russia invented phones? hahahahahahaha.
You answered the wrong post imbecile. You know, every joke is funny for a time, but your stupidity is getting old.
Yep, but retards don’t know that. You blew it. Again.
sorry ruski your the definition of the third world. but i will send you some yankie blue jeans
oh ruski. in 5 to 10 years china will swallow you whole.
Ahahaa you can’t even spell) I think you were meant to be aborted, but your mother talked just like you so you were born by a mistake very early. That happens a lot in the third world I presume. You’re a definition of a fail!
no your boring… its confusing for you i know… but really name one russian movie that is interesting and people who arnt in your third world soviet bloc would have ever heard of….?
so thats your go to joke. “I will rape your mum.” you are all class.
Just like your mother swallows Chinese?
stick a long neck in ya.
GOD could you be even more ignorant?) it’s you who should name at least a dozen Russian movies to be considered educated person. But you’re just a slumdog fuckwit. You’re such a failure
the best bit is it took three posts to get a link i never even clicked on. hahahahaha
you sad monkey you still dont know where i live. so how would you know anything.
so is this you or your mum? with all the russian inbreeding its hard to know….
You posting under the same comment again) God… Ok. That’s just too cruel. I am sorry that I laughed at you so hard. I know that you can’t do it to the mentally weak person, but you made it so easy! I am a terrible terrible person. have a good day!
P.S. Post some wallet id if you need a donation for your treatment.
yeah no one outside russia cares. have you not realised?
learn the Chinese anthem now. it will save time later.
keep trying. if i was in russia i would want to try and prove it was good… no wait if i was in russia i would kill my self… thats not living.
nice work retard did you know russia won the cold war by tricking people in to thinking they where a bucket of shit.
is this you or your mum? with all the russian inbreeding its hard to know….
i’m answering all posts randomly… did you think i was paying attention?
really. i have thrown more money at seagulls than you will ever see in rubles. i could give you the change out of my pocket and it would pay russias national debt. but i dont live in the third world like you.
Of course not honey! You live in your own, special world! And it doesn’t matter what rate it is! It’s SPECIAL!
P.S. Still waiting to see where to donate.
hahaha your comeback was an Indian movie. hahahahaha! russia is so lame it cant even trope an insult.
seriously my bank cannot do fractions of a cent that small.
That’s why I’m not donating in your currency. Don’t be shy!
rubels are not a currency. but thanks for playing.
Somebody gotta play with retarded kids) So long!
its so much fun watching you get cranky and have to go for a nap.
happy halloween little shortness clown.
you ask that a lot
Wow what the hell happened to her?
Just got back from seeing this movie, mainly so I could finally watch this review. I enjoyed the movie a lot, it was yet another great movie in Fincher’s filmography. I only had three issues with it:
1. The casino scene and the 80 billion cameras.
2. Amy’s newfound friend while she was hiding was WAYYYYYY too smart for an inbred redneck the way she figured out Amy’s identity was a fraud.
3. The ending. Why would a prick like Nick care about his kid in the slightest?
Other than that, definitely one of the better movies I’ve seen this year. Well worth the price of admission.
I thought what was coming after Amy got back home and made up the kidnapping rape story would be that Nick would tell the cop lady that the rape story was identical to the boyfriend we met earlier in the film who she accused of rape. Tied up, raped, with wounded coinciding with rape. I thought they were going to bring that character back and he would help prove the story wrong.
In the movie or when he creeped into your room at night?
Oh, both times…
Fincher is probably the best craftsman out there, but as Jay kinda pointed out (I was mostly just watching his lips move in their seductive dance of words), he needs scripts with a bit of twist to them. Zodiac was most definitely the “crime thing” Fincher is good at, but it was also a loving historical reconstruction (of some horrible shit). Social Network is Fincher does Sorkin, nuff said. Even Benjamin Button at least felt as nothing did before. I have not seen Gone Girl yet, so I should not even be allowed to judge, but it just feels as an average forgettable flick with a bit of master skills thrown behind it.
No Madea jokes, Mike? Really?
i really like Zodiac. nice historical movie in a modern style.
if there is an American i would trust to remake this great show its Fincher. or David Lynch.
Now that it’s out on bluray / online I skimmed it to find an example of the weird sound issues that I mentioned in my earlier post. Check out 32 minutes in when they are having their conversation that goes “promise me we’ll never be like them… all those awful couples who’s wives treat their husbands like dancing monkeys.” (first shudder at the stupid dialog) The audio there is obviously not mic’d but dubbed over in their own voices. Why the f’ would they do that? I’m not a movie guy much less a sound guy but I can tell when dialog is not original. This is just one of like 100 examples of where the editing and production of this movie is distracting and weird.
Only seeing this now…This looks amazing.
You do understand that the dialog was underlining how the characters themselves were inauthentic sociopaths (buzz term sorry) behaving as they “thought” people behaved.
I’m surprised they were complimenting the acting in Gone Girl. I thought the acting was boring. The characters were boring. The writing was boring. The whole movie was boring. None of the dialogue sounded real at all.
You don’t think Benjamin Button had a Forrest Gump vibe?
I remember watching this in the movie theater with my parents since my mom wanted to see it, and I remember their was like a bunch of teenagers and the whole audience went “uhhhhhhhh” when they saw Annabelle as people thinking “Who the fuck wants an ugly doll like that?” I am susprise the guys didn’t pointed that out.
Based on a real (made-up) story!
Perhaps you don’t understand the distinction between being played straight and being empty.
That image doesn’t apply to critiquing movies. It’s about finding things to do. If you’re watching a movie then you’ve already found something to do. Saying a movie is boring is a legitimate critique. If someone says something else is boring, you can’t turn that around by saying they have no right to be bored. Of course I have the power to not be bored. I can choose to not watch that movie.
I agree that the last statement of the image (which is whipped up for lack of want to type) is poorly judged. Any person can say whatever they wish. I apologize.
What I mean to say is that I dislike the use of the word ‘bored’ or boredom. It is partly personal as I feel I have never for a moment been that way since I was a child. The closest to it might be frustration.
But I cannot agree that describing something as boring is a legitimate critique. It is a sweeping, unspecific term. There is always a sharper, more incisive description (‘the delivery of this is flat’, ‘this lacks enough content’ or ‘human interest’, etc.).
Describing your experience says nothing about the content itself, unless there is a context beside it (‘I have never been able to take rom-coms seriously’, ‘This seemed to go on far longer that it required’ for example).
Beside saying the dialogue sounded unreal your post was perpetually dogged with this bland, idle word.
At least last night I was hammered, that’s a noble reason to be incoherent. Like killing yourself over gambling debts…
Why are all these posts in reverse chronological order and also without specific time indexes? Humanity got so lazily generalized… Fuck the Apple streamlining, simplification trend.
Youtube version if RedLetterMedia haven’t changed it before blip has been shut down https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bi9xE6EGWas&index=18&list=PL34C1F26D03F5F9B8
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