Half in the Bag: Captain America: Civil War

May 7, 2016614 Comments

Mike, Jay and Rich see the latest feature film to showcase characters wearing colorful costumes while punching bad guys and then discuss it. This time, the latest feature film to showcase characters wearing colorful costumes while punching bad guys is titled Captain America: Civil War.


Filed in: Half in the Bag

  • Skewed_View

    Cool, I didn’t expect you guys to see this movie.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    Wow, I somehow made 2nd comment. Hi again, folks.

    #TeamRichEvans

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    There was a listicle on IGN that had a headline of something like “13 Differences between the Civil War movie and the comic it’s based on.”

    There’s actually only one difference.

    The comic sucked balls and the movie did not do that.

  • bleurgh

    As a designer my favourite thing about Civil War was that all the place names and subtitles were in glorious Futura, the cadillac of fonts. Especially beautiful in iMax.

  • Captain Prickhard

    There…are…FOUR LIGHTS!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    It’s nice to see you guys bickering and disagreeing, and also kind of disliking a film that most people loved.

    Fresh perspectives, yo.

    Still loved it tho.

  • eeeh

    Oooh good. This will be fun

  • Danny Ingersoll

    they turned civil war into a basic revenge plot and made so any person who hates the avengers can destroy them it was very mediocre in storytelling

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    The best thing this film could have done was ignore the Civil War comic book upon which it is based.

    Because that comic sucked. It was an uneven mess, and a huge disappointment.

    I’m glad they merely lifted the concept and hung it on something that would play better on screen, and allow the characters room to breathe.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    We have a new house.

  • Armanti

    Winter Soldier was like a metaphor of NSA control and stuff. And i guess Civil War was about Gun Control. Anyway, it was fun when Spiderman punched that dude.

  • Cat Stevens

    Great fight scene.

  • Alexandria Sanders

    Great ending! So much laughter.

  • Adzl33t

    So instead of a basically gay pimp Nazi, MCU professor Zemo, is just some guy with another convoluted revenge plan, so was his family part of the early scenes of Ultron, which had Hydra instigated war crimes, why doesn’t Zemo take revenge on Hydra

    Having a villain to blame stuff kinda undermine the political debates of the movie, and kinda make Tony a jerk of not thinking about Bucky being mind controlled, which is not hard to consider within MCU that just had a British guy mind controlled dozens of people

    If Cap turn in Bucky (who wasn’t killed under custody) and launch a full proper investigation this would have been quicker

    Though Mike concept of an inept bureaucracy, seems very funny to me

  • David Lambkin

    It wasn’t so much the collateral damage that was the problem, it was who was responsible for the efforts to rebuild. There were a few quotes with people saying “after (this terrible event) The Avengers just left”, which is true. Even though they tried to minimise the damage and were certainly better than the alternative, they would just up and leave once the villains were defeated. The issue was more with accountability than collateral damage.
    Before, The Avengers were overseen by SHIELD, but since they have been disbanded, they are just operating by themselves.

  • Adzl33t

    Do people expect cops to clean up dead bodies and repair windows after a shoot out, I mean sure the Avengers could maybe do construction, but that’s not their jobs, that’s not their responsibility

    At least directly

  • Adzl33t

    Compare to Superman dragging a fight away from large empty cornfield to a small town for cheap advertisement, I have less complaints for the Avengers

  • BilboBaggins

    Wes Anderson was uncredited as titlest

  • Steven Gibbs

    Rich says if you don’t agree with iron man you’re retarded? WHAT? Did you even see the movie? Ya lets need a UN vote before we can save the world, especially with super villains with super powers, every time one of them attacks, we have to go to the UN explain what’s going on, and request the option to use super heros. No Rich, you are wrong.

  • frankelee

    Captain America’s War of Northern Aggression you mean. You fucking hackfrauds.

  • frankelee

    I like how the vaunted 117 UN member state panel was immediately forgotten about, and apparently all power being vested in the hands of a sociopathic, future supervillain. Basically undermined Iron Man’s entire argument, and proved Captain America right.

  • AreyouaNazi? Isthatyourelf?

    Iron Man’s view seems logical, but Cap’s view, having to wait for the government to decide if you should swing into action, meanwhile the problem gets worse… Yeah as an ex soldier I can fully sympathise with him. The amount of times the government drags their feet until it’s too late…

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Mike’s wish for a Planet Hulk movie might become a reality (sorta) according to some wild internet speculation regarding Thor 3.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Pretty much. Had the UN taken control of the Avengers, the collateral damage responsibility would’ve fallen on all 117 governments that signed on to control the Avengers. In a way, making it harder for people to point fingers at private individuals.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Movie’s Zemo seemed to have a very low concept of Hydra too. In the end, he wasn’t really out for revenge against the Avengers, in my opinion. His top priority seemed to be to destroy the dormant Winter Soldiers, so no one could use superhumans as weapons again. That’s also why he wanted to make the Avengers destroy themselves. His crusade was against all metahumans.

    I also think that making the “villain” so low key was intentional, so that the heroes on both sides (a reference to Star Wars Episode III Revenge of the Sith) could shine, and make their conflict the focus of the movie, not have them realize they were being manipulated and team-up against the bad guy in the end.

  • bleurgh

    I will agree that the movie was somewhat disappointing, especially as a follow-up to Winter Soldier, but it was still better than a lot of other films in the superhero genre.

    10 things I liked:

    1. It had the best depiction of Spiderman (in terms of characterisation) of any film

    2. As I pointed out before all of the place names and subtitles are in Futura and look beautiful

    3. Chadwick Boseman somehow managed to bring real gravitas to his performance in spite of not being in the film very long and his character being straight up rediculous

    4. I liked that the villain was a nobody who got hurt by the avengers without them even knowing about it, which actually supported the films themes really well i.e. the Avengers are totally oblivious to the collateral damage they have caused

    5. John fucking Slattery was in it and as usual crushes in every scene. I would say they need to use his character more, but I felt that way about Coulson and we all know how that terrible show they gave him turned out so maybe less is more

    6. There was some genuine humour and even when a joke fell flat I still appreciated the effort

    7. Ant-Man became Giant-Man! Sweet!

    8. I actually didn’t hate the crow-barred back-story between Iron Man and Bucky. It gave genuine weight to the final fight.

    9. Spiderman says of Captain Americas shield ‘That thing doesn’t obey the laws of physics’. Thanks to the movie for acknowledging my biggest problem with The Winter Soldier. Also seeing as Deadpool exists in another Studios universe I’m happy for Spiderman to be the Abed / 4th wall breaking comedic character in the MCU.

    10.

    8 things I didn’t like:

    1. Literally nothing was resolved

    2. They should have actually killed Rhodey in order to give the conflict some stakes

    3. Iron-man seems to be the films hero and Captain America the films villain and this would have been great if it were what they actually intended, but the movie seemed to really want you to root for Captain America

    4. As Rich pointed out, they completely deflated the inciting incident of the conflict because they were afraid of making the characters look unlikeable when they could have done

    5. There was a lot of shakes cam in the early fight scene, which in a movie this expensive is nothing more than a stylistic choice and honestly, enough with this shit already

    6. They seemed to have learned the wrong lesson from Winter Soldier, in that the reason everyone like it was that it was mildly intelligent and intriguing, not because it was grim

    7. Hey guys, remember SHIELD? What happened to SHIELD? Why isn’t this mentioned even once in this movie? Remember that guy with the eye-patch who was basically the main character in the last Captain America movie? He was fun. What ever happened to that guy?

    8. The Vision has the same problem as Thor and the Hulk in terms of unrealistic god-like powers that make a story about controlling them absurd. Although I liked his story-line with Scarlet Witch they probably should have disappeared him

    9. There would have been no film if Cap just brought Bucky in and explained that he was brain-washed the whole time

    10. The movies are getting to the point where they are so over-stuffed with characters that no-one gets enough of a story-line for an actual film to take place. This movie doesn’t cross the line, but rather tip-toes back and forth over it. some people call this Spider-man 3 syndrome, but it should more accurately be called X-men 3 syndrome. The former describes a film with too many villains, the latter a film with too many super-powered characters in general.

  • Adzl33t

    Eh the character is too vague, they could have got rid of him, and just focus on the other characters

  • While it wasn’t as good as The Winter Soldier I really did love the movie. I guess if you don’t like the the background politics stuff and prefer something like Age of Ultron then this one just wasn’t going to do it for you. What I love about it was (spoilers) that the weapons/creations of Stark Industries came home to roost. Constantly making weapons to make the world more secure from the previous weapons that you made only makes the world less secure. So when Bucky and Cap are fighting Tony and Tony has the brain fart to tell Cap he doesn’t deserve the shield that his father made, he should have realized that it all came from dad. If Bucky killed his parents it’s because his parents were transporting more of the drugs that created super soldiers. A super soldier fighting for a government killed him. Not the government he intended to use the super soldier weapons but that’s what’s wrong with creating weapons including Cap, Bucky, Ultron, Vision, himself, War Machine. Weapons can be used by anyone who gets their hands on them. So Tony’s hair-brained idea to allow the Avengers to be used as weapons was the final straw in a stupid family tradition of weapon creation that harms innocents for the will of some political agenda. He knew he kept making it worse but he didn’t seem to understand that his dad started it. That’s what made the film so real to me.

  • Bender3000

    Rich didn’t know that instead lying there, he should have swung up at the guy when he’s standing over you. That’s something he mustn’t have learned in his VCR training.

  • Mitchell Taco Nash

    New house? :O

  • NicCagesHair

    There is nothing wrong with Spider-man 3. It has a finger guns dance sequence in it.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    I like that Mike and Rich didn’t act like this was the second coming, that it was not the polar opposite of BvS, and that indeed it was similar in tone, plot, and quality. Looking at Metacritic several other reviews have been this nuanced and mixed, but you have to really look to find them, otherwise the internet seems to think this is a perfect film.

    By the way, i’ve talked about Metacrtitic versus Rotten Tomatoes on here before. On Metacritic this movie has a 75 out of 100 because it uses three standards (good, mixed, and bad), whereas on RT, every single mixed review except I believe one is just shown as “fresh”, so that’s why on RT it has as some ridiculously high score of I think 95% or something, because usually if a film gets a “mixed” review, well, that’s not a rotten review, so it must be fresh, right? I’m not much for metaanalysis, but it seems clear to me that Metacritic does a much better job than RT at averaging these scores.

    EDIT: Well it seems Civil War has gone down to 91% on RT.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    The Amazing World of Tapeworms. check the pages i’m following. all the cool kids are there. sully, wizard, tapey, tOmy and Omi. the whole gang.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    Are you talking about Ross? He does become the Red Hulk, right? I wonder if they’ll ever do that in this universe (they seem very against having Hulk films or even a film with a Hulk-centric subplot).

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    They seem to see all the biggest blockbusters, I’m not surprised.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    Okay, that was some incredible choreography at the end. Len Kabasinski must have helped you guys out with that one. You should submit that scene to the Movie Gods to prove that you’re ready to take the helm of the next ‘Raid’ movie.
    ‘Raid: The One in the Blue Bottle.’

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    I agree except I also agree with Rich’s point that the event that forced the issue should have been more than 11 people dying. I was confused by the death toll numbers being shown, for example, the Battle of New York says I believe 73 total people dead, that’s ridiculously low when entire buildings were knocked over willy nilly by the space dragons. If they had made it 730 it would have been realistic, and also enough collateral damage that maybe you could blame some of it on the Avengers. The Hulk accidentally crushing one guy was ridiculous. No one would care in real life except that guy’s immediate family. I will say that the Zemo character worked on that level since it dovetailed well with Tony’s personal loss as well, but as far as the overall plot goes it made little sense that a hundred casualties in Sokovia when an entire city was lifted into the air and then thrown at the ground would ever be an issue.

    Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but at the end of Avengers 1, I’m pretty sure the newscast says that hundreds of people died. I have joked in the past that Marvel isn’t allowed to have any of these events kill more people than 9/11, 9/11 has to be the greatest national tragedy, real or fictional, especially for a movie about New York (and in which there are scenes going, “We may have superpowers, but you police officers and firefighters, you’re the REAL heroes!” PSA type stuff). I get that. But 73?! Ridiculous. And it is inconsistent with what I’m pretty sure Avengers 1 says at the end (not to mention what we see in the darn film).

  • frankelee

    Yeah General/Secretary of State Ross. He eventually becomes the Red Hulk and is crazy, and he never mentions the UN or runs anything by them at all during the movie. To the point where I assume it was purposeful, this UN council is nowhere to be seen and Ross is unilaterally ordering everyone around, revealing that this solution is really a disaster in the making.

    I bet they would be excited about doing a Hulk film if they knew it would make money!

  • kingofmadcows

    General Ross was already pretty bad in Hulk. He tricked Banner into making the super soldier serum that created the Hulk. He gave the serum to Blonsky, which led to Abomination. He didn’t give a crap about collateral damage when he went after the Hulk. It really made no sense for them to put him in charge of overseeing the Avengers.

  • As someone who studied the UN and knows people who currently work for the UN, RLM’s representation of the UN under pressure is 100% on point. Except for at the end of the process, Captain America wouldn’t be authorised to do anything. The UN would only release a non-binding recommendation that something should be done and the next three months would be in committees to decide exactly what should be done. Following that, there would be a team deployed to deal with the threat (or rather the athermath), but they wouldn’t have the budget nor the authority to effective address the issue. Following that, they might authorise NATO to actually address the problem, but only if it happened in a NATO-friendly country.

    This is exactly why superheroes ARE vigilantes.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    Well, to be fair, what Rich and the rest said about the UN basically having no real power is true, and if such a law were put into effect in real life, the countries that would be enforcing it would be a mere handful, and the U.S., Russia, and China would be responsible for 95% of it, as they are permanent members of the Security Council. The U.N. only has power because of the few omnipotent countries within it that head it up.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I saw the movie and liked it. Nothing about it really stuck with me, but I do remember thinking, “Boy… a movie with this many disparate elements probably ran a lot smoother than it should have.”
    I thought the movie was good, passable fun, and I don’t really think the “politics” bogged it down too much because most of it was just colorful costumed combatants colliding catastrophically. I thought it was good, passable fun, which means that the Av Club commenters are hailing it as a masterpiece.
    There are a lot of things that I liked about the movie, but I’d rather focus on the things that I didn’t like, because a huge dick.
    I respect RIchevans and I respect his opinions, but I honestly think that the “funny, quippy” Spiderman that he pines for is an overrated characterization. Sure, Tobey Macquire’s Spiderman could have used some more wisecracks, I guess, but Spiderman in this movie just sort of got on my nerves after a while. I like this Spiderman but I thought that his relentless fanboyism was a bit much.
    Mike thought that the movie was too dour, but I actually thought that there were a lot of things that took away from the weight of the hero’s battle. Like, it should have been a source of drama that Hawkeye and Black Widow, best friends, were on opposing sides of the conflict. The way they spoke to each other in their brief scuffle, though, it just made it seem like they were going to fight each other in the civil war and then go out for burgers afterward.
    Spiderman and Ant-Man shouldn’t have been in this movie. The didn’t have any personal stake in the conflict and they didn’t really seem to have any political opinions that would make them want to participate in the battle. I think the battle would have had more weight to it if Thor and The Hulk were there instead because they were probably the ones who caused the most collateral damage in the first place. The Hulk would be all guilty for the damage he caused and sign on for the accords and Thor would be all, “HA HAAAAAAA! VERILY! DOST THOU THINK THOU CAN INFLICT THINE LAWS UPON A GOD? I’LL CHOKE ON MY MEAD FIRST! VERILY! THOOOOOOOOR!”
    And then Thor would hit The Hulk with his big, dumb hammer.

  • Whales

    The entire “moral” argument of team stark is complete horseshit. What kind of delusional fantasy world must one live in to believe you can regulate behavior?

  • Whales

    Exactly.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    I really liked this movie, personally, I don’t have any big complaints. On the other hand, i don’t have any big complaints about BvS and I liked it as well. I have a pretty big DC bias, though, I don’t really read any of the Marvel comics, just watch the shows and movies and cartoons. DC I will actually sit down and read the books.

  • Captain Hackfraud

    There were a couple of funny moments. I liked when Ant-Man got into Iron-Man’s suit. I also liked when Tony Stark paid Spiderman a visit and there was that strange undercurrent of double entendre going on.

    Captain America was the most likeable he’s ever been in a Marvel Movie. But it was really strange that he didn’t drink the government cool aid.

    Conversely, Iron Man was the least likeable. I’m still not sure why he would chose to submit to the government. At first I thought, he would just be playing along officially while secretly doing his thing like he wants. That would have been great, but apparently because that young promising student dies during their last mission and because he had relationship problems with Pepperonia, he gets all kinds of self doubt and rather gets his orders from some kinda a government board. Like the people he used to explixitly not sell weapons to anymore cause he didn’t trust them.

    What made it a bit mediocre for me was the basic premise of the Civil War. The airport is symptomatic for the whole thing. Yes, The airport fight was fun, but what is all the fighting among the two groups of “good guys” going to accomplish? It felt so pointless. Are they going all out to kill each other or are they holding back and fighting with kid gloves? They certainly don’t intend to seriously injure each other, yet, the airport tower crumbles, and all kinds of rockets explode, while Ant-Giant tramples around the airfield. And then when War-Machine gets hit and crashes they seem all surprised and immediately Iron-Man and Captain Falcon dive after him, like nobody didn’t really mean to hurt anyone the whole time? The way they fought was not to incapacitate, but is that what we are supposed to believe, cause good guys don’t kill each other?

    And in the end, it had been Colonel Zemo’s Plan all along to lure Tony Stark to Siberia to show him some old surveillance footage to drive a wedge between the Avengers. And he told all this to Stark. And even though Stark knew this and that Buck was basically a brainwashed puppet, he chose the fight with Cap and Bucky? Yeah, I know, his poor mother. I bet he would have chosen not to fight if his mother’s name had been Martha.

    Somewhat enjoyable, but definitely not a must see.

  • Cap’s never been one to just blindly follow orders. He’s loyal strictly to the ideals the country is founded on, but holds the power-that-be in healthy scrutiny.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    I agree with your critiques but don’t feel they reduce it from being a must-see film. This is still top-tier Marvel and definitely one of the best they have produced. If people like the other films in the series they will like this one. This is not like Thor Dark World territory where it’s a bit iffy whether it is “can’t miss” entertainment.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I don’t think that it’s impossible to inject some sort of politics into a Superhero story. I mean, in the REAL WORLD, I would be absolutely horrified of superheroes, but superheroes can and should exist in an alternate universe where they make some sort of sense.
    The problem is that I’m really kind of tired of these same arguments that crop up over and over again in these movies.
    Like, so many movies now revolve around the “ethics” of superheroing and they keep repeating the same arguments over and over and over.
    “Superheroes need to be registered!”
    Yeah, X-Men has it covered.
    “The presence of superheroes creates more villains!”
    Yeah, that was the whole “escalation” theme of the Nolan Trilogy and of SEVERAL other Batman stories. We get it. Superheroes pretty much cause more problems than they solve. CONSTANTLY bringing this up is making it pretty hard for me to suspend my disbelief and root for them.
    And then, in the second season of ‘Daredevil,’ there was the same tired debate between Frank and Matt about whether it was okay to murder criminals or just punch them hard enough to give them permanent brain damage.
    These debates just get tedious after a while. I’ve heard them all before.
    I’m pretty much over superhero “deconstructions.” It’s not as clever as people seem to think it is. Unless it’s done beautifully by Alan Moore, exposing the fragile seams of the superhero world isn’t all that artistically bold or politically salient. It’s just TEDIOUS after a while.
    They really need to mine this universe for new material. Transcend politics. Get WEIRD and fantastical with it.
    Or just, like, make other movies where you can SERIOUSLY talk about these issues.
    Yeah… right…

  • Makkon Farstriders

    We don’t let any random Joe run around with a baseball bat, distributing vigilante justice where he sees fit with no repercussions. I agree with Rich, the entire “moral” argument for the Accords is on Iron Man’s side.

    “If we cannot accept some limitations, then we are no better than the bad guys”.

    Stark is 100% correct. Even law enforcement have accountability. What kind of a crazy world would it be to let vigilantes roam about without oversight or accountability? Sorry, that’s nuts.

  • Whales

    And yet it happens. With all the rules, laws, penalties, oversight, repercussions, and punishments we have people still murder each other. Behavior is not bound by your delusions of security blankets.

  • Bubs

    Haven’t seen the movie. Going to talk about it now.

    Rich is wrong. Captain America’s defining trait is that he believes in freedom. He’s also a man who came from the 30s, where American freedom didn’t mean “the government watches everything you do, so don’t fuck up.” So it makes perfect sense for Captain America to be against government regulation, since it represents the polar opposite of freedom. If Captain America has an arch nemesis, it may very well BE government regulation. In fact, the very American constitution implores the American people to overthrow the fucking government if it oversteps its bounds.

    My problem with the premise is that Tony Stark should ALSO be against government regulation. He’s a businessman. And all businesses want to do is make all the money in the universe. And they do this with LESS government regulation. This movie should’ve been about the Avengers rebelling against the Establishment and murdering the fuck out of SHIELD because of government over-regulation. It should’ve been called Captain America: Revolution. The movie ends with Captain America planting a flag into the head of the NSA’s neck.

  • kingofmadcows

    When you think about it, that whole airport fight scene was unnecessary since all Tony had to do was destroy or disable the Quinjet. He had time to evacuate the airport, he could have just flown the jet away.

    And yeah, you can’t really apply too much real world logic to comic book stories. The real world argument of superheroes needing oversight to ensure that they learn from mistakes and get better at saving people makes sense. But it doesn’t work in a comic book world because every government, corporation, or just about anyone with authority or power is secretly controlled by supervillains like Hydra or AIM or the Hand or whatever. Heck, this movie falls immediately into that trap by putting General Ross in charge of overseeing the Avengers. Not only was Ross basically responsible for creating the Hulk and Abomination, and he didn’t give a crap about collateral damage in that movie, but he clearly didn’t give a crap about collateral damage in this movie. The troops they sent to kill Bucky was shooting off guns in an apartment building and they had a helicopter shooting a heavy machine gun at Bucky and Black Panther while they were on top of a civilian building.

  • I would point out that Cap is, yes, from the 30’s. Remember the American narrative for the 1930’s? FDR had just cured the depression with big government and the new deal. Captain America probably would have had a very good impression of big government, as it wasn’t until the 70’s and 80’s did the concept of the welfare state start to break down in the west: the very same concept that was built by policies like FDR’s New Deal.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    Yep. That.

  • I dunno. That’s kinda like arguing “eh, people are gonna rape and murder anyway, why bother punishing it or try preventing it?”

  • Stark is right that there should be accountability and regulations for people that are basically walking WMDs, but Cap’s right to be skeptical that said overseers might not have people’s best interests in mind, and that they could hinder immediate responses to particular threats.

    Really though, in a sane world, they’d just hash out a compromise over a weekend like two buddies that actually trusted and liked one another. Like in that one “What If” scenario that was infinitely better and more logical than the original stupid event comic.

  • Whales

    The reason I don’t rape or murder isn’t because I’m afraid of the punishment. It’s because of a belief system of ideals. Superheroes are the physical, anthropomorphic representation of ideals. The concept of regulating or legislating an ideal is ridiculous, silly, and not even possible. Captain America could sniff that a mile away, he was 100% correct in telling Tony to fuck off.

  • Stark being pro-reg makes enough sense. He was a weapons manufacturer who saw first-hand the damage his creations caused, and even though he shut down that portion of his company, he continued to have a very cavalier attitude towards the government.
    Then the Ultron fiasco happens due to his negligence, and now hundreds more are dead and there’s probably billions worth of property damage, far outstripping anything his weapons caused before. It’s a more direct and sensible arc for his character to have than in the Civil War comic, at the very least.
    The thing that really doesn’t make sense is the fact that he and Cap wouldn’t take more time just to talk things up and come up with a better solution that they could both agree on. Bucky being thrown into the mix exacerbated things, but like Mike said, there was a far more rational and simple way they could have avoided an outright conflict.

  • David Lambkin

    But that’s exactly my point. The cops work for the government, who has other people employed for those tasks. The Avengers work for themselves and have no-one employed in those secondary services.

  • a_productive_fart

    So, here we have final confirmation that Jay is the only reasonable member of the RLM unholy trio. The irony of a joyless, cynical, barely functional alcoholic like Mike decrying this movie as too dark & dour is, well… ironic. Nothing but “punching”—really?! The hand-to-hand combat in this film is inspired by The Raid films, by the Greengrass Jason Bourne movies—the hand-to-hand combat in this film is exciting, fast-paced yet coherent—it’s great! And the airport scene was fun, very imaginative, making the best use of every character’s powers and personality—as close as we could hope to get to a comic book battle royale on the big screen. And Rich needs to relinquish his Marvel nerd credentials—the “best cinematic depiction of Spider-Man” (I’m just paraphrasing—something to that effect) is somehow not worth the price of admission, is only worth a shrug? I think that Mike’s slurring contrarianism has been a bad influence on Rich. You can pick apart the plot and character-motivation details for hours, but it doesn’t matter—THIS FILM IS SCHLOCK—but it’s fun and expertly executed schlock. This review glossed over (no, it practically omitted) the best parts of the movie. And then it ended with a five-minute (action? comedic? some “ironic”, no-stakes muddle of both?) sequence that somehow felt longer than the entirety of Civil War. You’re failed filmmakers—you’re not film critics, or at least no more than any of us assholes here in the comments section—you fucking parasites!

  • But in the context of their world, they aren’t just anthropomorphic representations of ideals; they’re people that have the very real potential to cause massive amounts of damage to both lives and property.

    They’re still people, and moral ones at that, with their own rights and freedoms, but the idea that some civilians wouldn’t be comfortable with them doing their business unbeholden to some kind of institution isn’t an unreasonable one.

    In reality, there’s a reason cops and authority figures are supposed to be held accountable and in some sort of check for their actions. Does that always work with the rules, laws, penalties, oversight, repercussions, and punishments we have in place? Hell no. But that doesn’t mean it’s rational to not even try having any oversight and just let them mete justice as they see fit either.

    And for the record, I’m more team Cap than Stark, but it doesn’t change the fact that what’s at stake is beyond just “regulating behavior”.

  • Captain Prickhard

    stop #boozershaming

  • I was a little taken aback that he thought the movie was “mostly punching” when the actions scenes felt like they made up 1/3-1/4 of the film at best.

  • Captain Prickhard

    Maybe he’s just grown up and out of superhero movies.

  • Tukka

    Accountability and oversight are good, but what they were talking about in the movie was putting the Avengers under the direct authority of the UN, which is a notion that’s just as asinine as letting them operate completely independently.

    It would have been useful to have someone with authority to put their foot down and stop Stark from a reckless attempt to create an AI demigod by exploiting an artifact that was beyond his ken. But if Stark shrugged off the better judgment of his peers in the Avengers, do you really think bureaucratic red tape would’ve stopped him in his hubris?

    It’s a movie so there I guess there isn’t a lot of room to explore the nuances. Philosophically, the best approach would involve some sort of middle ground. As things are portrayed in the movie though, Rogers has the more sympathetic position, as is fitting for the film’s protagonist.

  • Makkon Farstriders

    Ya, but we don’t *allow* it. It’s regulated. That’s the point. Could he still do what he wants? Sure. He can break the law. Then he can deal with the consequences.

  • Makkon Farstriders

    Exactly; his point is way off.

  • Rhodey should have died, and the Avengers that got caught in the end should have stayed in prison. As much as I enjoyed it, those two aspects in the end really deflated the stakes of the movie’s end for me.

  • a_productive_fart

    Yeah, it made me question whether or not he can distinguish between good and bad action sequences, which is disturbing—I generally like Mike, and have trusted his opinion, up to this point.

  • I think it’s just his personal preference. Mike seems like the kind of guy who gets more out of violence that feels more visceral and consequential.
    I have a feeling that his critique is less about the choreography, and more that many of these battles end fairly bloodlessly and without much real consequence, which is what a lot of the fights in most superhero movie basically turn into.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Actually glad no one died. Though that might just be the Game of Jabrones fatigue talking.

  • alanpeart

    I’m with you. The whole reason I was a fan of Marvel when I was a child was because of the “cosmic” and imagination-expanding aspects of the universe. At the time I was reading, stuff like Secret Wars blew my mind. At the same time, social commentary and satire and dark themes were done SO much better in 2000AD. I enjoyed them in different ways.

  • Galactic Shawn

    Captain America and Ironman should have just settled all that s**t in Night Court. Now that would be a great cross over.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Stark isn’t just a businessman. This is a guy who, in the comics at least, was briefly the Secretary of Defense, and the Director of SHIELD. He would want to get ahead of the regulation and be involved with it, and make sure the terms are favorable for him and his superbuddies.

  • a_productive_fart

    Well, then he needs to stop reviewing summer-franchise-tent-pole movies. It’s a vicious circle of cardboard, Hollywood blockbusters followed by cynical, disillusioned commentary. Why spend so much time picking apart something that you’re guaranteed to hate? Maybe Mike needs to retire…

  • a_productive_fart

    Actually, I’ve always resented the way that RLM portrays stoners as stupid, but alcoholism is somehow funny & harmless. Between the two drugs, I think we both know which one is the most dangerous—individually and collectively.

  • Jerome Gorden

    Just got back from the 11:00 p.m. show. If only the guys who wrote this had done BvS. It would have been epic.

  • I still don’t get why he had to be Zemo other than just name recognition. Hell, Abdul al-Rahman from the Ultimates series would have made more sense for the role.

  • I do not think the Avengers would have to get a green light from a committee before acting. What I think it means is that those countries as a resolution of the UN are authorizing the Avengers to operate in their countries and around the world, and if anything goes wrong the Avengers will have to explain themselves and answer charges if something does go wrong. Which makes sense.

    It would be problematic for a country if someone without government oversight started enforcing their interpretation of the law while wearing that country’s flag. And it would be really confusing to people in general that a group of un-elected people with no badges decide to enforce their interpretation of the law anywhere they want.

    It is almost like it is a metaphor for US intervention in various countries around the world.

  • I do not think the Avengers would have to get a green light from a committee before acting in each individual situation. What I think it means is that those countries as a resolution of the UN are authorizing the Avengers to operate in their countries and around the world, and if anything goes wrong the Avengers will have to explain themselves and answer charges if something does go wrong. Which makes sense. It is giving them a veneer of oversight.

    Like Rich said, if Captain America had just signed and then told them all that he needed to investigate further Bucky’s involvement they would have let him.

    But then I did not read the fictional resolution.

  • Jeana

    The best part of Captain America Civil War was when Boyhood took 12 years to make.

  • SamWongBal

    guess what Mike and Rich, I actually saw Civil War and you two are 100% full of shit. Sounds like you two were asleep for most of it.

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    The character played by Martin Freeman was also a huge asshole. And the movie is called Captain America for a reason (rather than Avengers: Civil War which would seem to be a more apt title), I do think we are intended to take Cap’s side.

  • SUPERMAD

    A-fucking-men

  • Bubs

    Can you point out to me where and when they claimed that their opinion was more valid than anyone else’s?

    “as close as we could hope to get to a comic book battle royale on the big screen.” Pretty much tells me all I need to know about what kind of video games you want to see on the big screen.

  • Shakes_McQueen

    I’m pretty staggered by Mike and Rich’s reactions to this movie. I was really excited to see this video, because the film seemed like it would be right up their alley – properly established conflict with no simple answer, character beats that are actually organic to who the character is, and the typical moments of levity, as well as an action scene that is being repeatedly called potentially the best in comic-book movie history by critics. All of this seems like it should be right up their alley.

    This film is basically the anti-BvS, despite tackling some of the same concepts – and Mike’s reaction is “at least BvS was dark all the way through”?!

    Sometimes it seems like all Mike wants is another Donner Superman with uncomplicated heroism, yet he also really liked Winter Soldier. I’m just baffled.

    He gave Thor 2 a better review than this! Think on that!

  • Bubs

    “Transcend politics. Get WEIRD and fantastical with it.” I fail to see how this would make the movies better in any way. I don’t give a fuck about the Super McGuffin from Planet X anymore than I care about Peter Parker getting his homework done before the Green Goblin destroys New York City.

    I prefer them at least TRYING (and failing) to tackle real world issues. This has the potential of occupying my brain for more than a billisecond. Because if I have to hear about another fucking infinity gem from Planet Xenu (and we have like 3 more to go) I’m going to blow my dick off.

    Also, the DareDevil Vs. Punisher issues worked for me in the show, but I don’t read comics, play the vidya games, or give a fuck about superheros at all. You may just be suffering from superhero oversaturation.

  • Bubs

    “at least BvS was dark all the way through” This was only one statement he made, not his entire feelings about the movie. I think he summed it up best when he said “I’m just tired of superhero movies”.

  • Evertale

    As time goes on, I find my tastes to align more and more with Jay. He got me into Blue Ruin, the Crank movies (in all their horrible glory) and Sam Raimi’s works over the years. All things Fargo as well!
    More than anything, I guess this comment is meant to say thank you! What you guys do is entertaining, but beyond that it has helped me discover a lot of stuff and angles that I wouldn’t have otherwise!

  • emily_waves

    I mean, I’ve always felt that Mike’s taste in movies were pretty consistent. The guy likes a simple story, and appreciates a film that can resonate with a lot of people. My taste also aligns more with Jay, but I also think Mike is a good balance to the dynamic. Because sometimes I also just want to watch the kind of film Mike talks about.

  • Shakes_McQueen

    It’s all good if Mike’s just tired of these movies, but that doesn’t explain contradicting himself more than once.

    Rich thinks the UN is useless, but also doesn’t think Cap has a point about not wanting to submit to their agenda? Especially after what happened to him in Winter Soldier?

    Mike doesn’t like excessive collateral damage, but thinks there should be a scene where 300 kids get blown up?

    I think Winter Soldier is a slightly better film than Civil War, but both are in another galaxy compared to something like Thor 2.

  • Bubs

    “Mike doesn’t like excessive collateral damage, but thinks there should be a scene where 300 kids get blown up”

    Mike never said he doesn’t like excessive collateral damage. He said it was unavoidable. Trying to regulate it when giant alien snakes invade New York city from another dimension is kind of pointless.

    He said that the movie should’ve had the 300 kids getting blown up thing, because it demonstrates negligence on the Avenger’s part, and it’s a big fucking deal. It could’ve been avoided. Unlike when 3 or 4 people die on a giant floating city which will soon crash to the ground killing everyone on earth.

  • SUPERMAD

    Guess I’m #TeamJay

  • SUPERMAD

    I disagree about Spidey and Antman but I love your Thor-Hulk idea.

  • Shakes_McQueen

    But they both savaged Man of Steel for the sheer scale of collateral damage in that film. And it’s never “pointless” to regulate collateral damage – in fact one of things Rich LIKED about Ultron, was that they showed the Avengers trying to save people amidst the fighting. Would Mike say “oh, there’s no point in Superman trying to regular collateral damage, when some aliens are trying to kill everyone on earth”? Because he sure didn’t back then.

    And collateral damage constitutes more than just deaths – if I were the President of a country that got effectively leveled by a conflict involving the Avengers, would I not be lobbying for some form of control over where and how they are dispatched? Especially if that threat was some rogue AI created by one of them in the first place? They should just accept that their buildings will be destroyed, based on decisions made by people with whom they have no input?

    And we have no idea how many people died in Ultron. The fact that civilians were still running around during the attack, suggests more than a few died.

    In Civil War, the opening action scene fuckup is the final straw for the governments of the world. The idea that the world would accept the Avengers just saying “hey, if you wanna make an omelette, you gotta break a few eggs”, is unrealistic. Especially if it’s your country that just had a major city wiped off the map – civilian casualties or not.

    The Avengers obviously have a compelling argument that some amount of collateral damage is natural with what they do, and the threats they fight. But it’s also completely realistic that the international community would not be particularly sympathetic to those arguments, fair or not – especially when the Avengers are being given limitless autonomy on when and where to accept collateral damage, answerable to no one.

  • a_productive_fart

    Did you even see the movie? One of the best superhero mega-battles ever committed to film! The flat, utterly joyless reception by the ‘Half in the Bag’ trio (except Jay) was surprising and disappointing to me—perhaps a deal-breaker. Why do I bother checking out this site, and clicking on their videos? There are hundreds of similar sites. And yes, we’re talking about guilty pleasure, stupid spandex movies here—”video game” movies. You’re not looking for depth, or else you wouldn’t be here, commenting with your stupid Trailer Park Boys avatar. This isn’t the Criterion Collection, this isn’t ’60s or ’70s avant-garde, art house cinema… if you want to go there, then, by all means, lead the way…

  • SUPERMAD

    I’ve got a problem with people who use the word “murder” loosely. There’s a difference between killing and murder.

    I think people like Alfre Woodard’s character do exist (ie. Cindy Sheehan) and would say the things they do. Her son dies and she can’t handle it and so she lashes out at Tony. Fine.

    But she’s wrong. It’s not murder. Tony didn’t make the city rise up into the air.
    What I wish is that someone would call her on it. Tony (or someone) should have said, “Ultron was trying to kill everyone on earth. Not just your son; everyone. And he had an army of robots helping him to make sure that happened. I’m so sorry your son died in that conflict, but IRON MAN DIDN’T MURDER HIM.”

    The thinking, rational Tony would say this.

  • caye74

    Strange review, really strange .. although I can concede to number of points made by Mike and Rich, they exaggerated them so much that ultimately they made them almost irrelevant as a review point. Whole things just same across as if M&R were so butt-hurt by BvS it basically destroyed their enjoyment of the CW.

    This is easily top 5, top 3 even Marvel’s movie. It’s ok if you don’t like the genre, but it’s ridiculous this amount of hate spewed by M&R.

    Involvement of Rich basically destroyed the review because there was no real argument, just team tagging on Jay

    #ReviewOfTheReview
    #WhoWatchesTheReviwers
    #TeamJay

  • Derek

    I agree with both you, @madsboldingfengerpoulsen:disqus, and @emily_waves:disqus.

    And of all the movie reviewers out there, M&J are the two that I trust the most to not steer me wrong when it comes to watching a movie I might not otherwise watch.

  • Evertale

    Oh yeah, they compliment one another well, and each of course have their points and argue them well – actually that’s what makes the show interesting. Well that and watching Rich Evans getting shot repeatedly (apropos Sam Raimi tormenting his leads on camera)

  • spoustus

    why is everyone talking about the movie? do you actually follow what they say about all these movies? do you watch the movie they talk about all the time? is that why you’re all here??….

  • spoustus

    could you link us up with the criterion collection disqus?

  • spoustus

    i used to be #TeamJay for years, but slowly I saw the light and i’m #TeamMike now. did i progress? didn’t see the review yet, but i ain’t talking no movie opinions when i say #TeamMike, if you know what i mean

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    It was like a high school fight behind the gym after school. but more childish.
    looked cool though

  • Domo

    I think Bucky/Winter Soldier being accused of blowing up the UN congregation is probably enough of a reason for all this craziness to start. Dead kids is a little overboard. They even show a dead child in their meeting’s footage covered in dust and staring into the screen.

    I would have liked for previous movie’s major events to not have been used as a means to start UN accords because it just gets so complicated. If you look at NYC, TOP MEN drop a nuke in the city’s epicenter to try and stop an alien invasion that Iron Man stops. Any attempts at oversight from the government could have easily been rebuked because the government was complicit in 2 of the major events mentioned in the film, dropping a nuke and overseeing 3 helicarriers designed solely to kill 700,000 people at a time.

    If they set up the film with just “Bucky blew up the UN. We need to put a stop to you enhanced people regardless of what side your on” it might have made more sense. I’m not really sure. As the movie goes on, more info is revealed and it either becomes easier for the audience to pick a side, or the avengers to pick one. I do greatly appreciate the writers trying to make it ambiguous, but with this many characters, it’s really difficult to pull off without annoying people.

  • Embodied

    Maybe a generation thing. Heroes have to be normal persons who accomplish something not everybody could do. If I should be interested it has to be a story like this. Not some mutants or gods/aliens or US soldiers killing journalists.

  • Anders Hass

    I like that Jay didn’t change his mind!

  • Amontillado

    Jay got me into the Crank movies as well, and Mike has brought up some really nice and nuanced points. One review (I can’t remember which_ Mike brought up the camera filters and how the color of the film, and the genre of the film, we from two different genres; I’ve never heard another film critic make an observation like that and appreciate Mike for bringing it up.

    I believe that Mike, Jay, and Rich are the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit of film reviewers.

  • 10/10 That is how much I love cartoons…………………………………………………………..

  • Urethra Franklin

    When was Rich allowed to join this august deliberative body? He’s not ready for the big leagues! Send him back down to the minors.

  • caye74

    It’s pretty clear Jake is very bad influence on Rich, he became extremely opinionated, but not in the good way, he expects that his words are gospel

  • Domo

    When they gotta make the cracker joke, Rich Evans is there to take it like the good friend he is!

  • StillCantBanMe

    No, it really was pretty lopsided and middle of the road, big fight scene aside. Convoluted senseless villain, Iron Man can stop a Hulk but Cap gives him trouble, no real impact on the world around them much like the dissolution of SHIELD after the senseless HYDRA reveal….

  • StillCantBanMe

    Thor 2 had great design and a great villain. This villain was an incompetent joke, the movie was bipolar in tone.

  • StillCantBanMe

    Or it sounds like you’re easily impressed.

  • StillCantBanMe

    I loved the brawl but it’s not a reason. Special effects aren’t special anymore.

  • StillCantBanMe

    I doubt a movie called Ragnarok is going to squeeze that in too.

  • Adzl33t

    Maybe when there’s more B List characters, they can bandle the grunt work, like that Justice League episode with Booster Gold

    Which as a DC fanboy, I gelt Justice Unlimited did a better job discussing government policies with superheroes

    Why isn’t Dini kicking out Hack Synder

  • Whales

    In the context of their world, I as a viewer am some outerdimensional observation entity with elements of prescience and omniscience. Therefore in the context of this argument, I’ll trust my opinion over anything else.

  • The Elegant Flaw Filial

    I call conspiracy! The only reason Jay liked this movie was because the Russo Brothers directed it and he’s a ‘Community’ fanboy!
    I CAN SMELL DAN HARMON’S DICK ON YOUR BREATH, JAY! I SEE THROUGH YOUR DECEPTION.


    …or he just liked the movie. But I’ve been huffing waaaaay too much ether for that explanation to be the one that makes the most sense.

  • The big flaw is just the presence of the accords in the first place. I was a dumb idea in the comic, and it’s probably what bogged this movie down the most. If it had just been about the team getting divided over what to do with Bucky, it would have worked better.
    I have a feeling that’s what the Russos wanted to do, but they were probably mandated to throw in the ham-fisted political bits to make it more like the comic. The fact that they managed to salvage an enjoyable flick out of it anyway is what’s most impressive.

  • Although I haven’t seen Captain America: Civil War, like many in the comments section of this review I am outraged. Mike and Rich’s below par appraisal of this uncannily realistic simulation of a fight between Chris Evan and Robert Downey Jr belittles, not only America’s founding fathers, but anyone who has tasted freedom by French-kissing the crack in the liberty bell, during a school trip to Washington.

    There remains no option other than to establish an international governing body, overseen by the UN, that will regulate the activity of Red Letter Media.

    This committee will make multilateral decisions regarding the films reviewed by RLM and will ensure that appropriate conclusions are drawn.

    You brought the roof down on yourselves, you hack frauds.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    People arguing about ‘realistic’ and ‘In the real world.’ are stupid. the only real world is Star Wars Deep Babylon 5: The Force Awakens the One Ring.
    There can be only one.

  • caye74

    I choose to believe that each movie is actually in separate multiverse, lol.

    This trope with changing the powers/abilities of the characters during the movie is old as cinema itself.

  • cucadandi

    That last fight scene was more thrilling than anything in Civil War.

  • TMC_Sherpa

    Is Marvel putting to much crap in each movie? Probably. But if they did it slower then the first Avengers movie wouldn’t be out for a few years. Maybe they should put out releases more often? But movies are expensive and take a long time to make. Maybe they should write books instead? But books are boring. Maybe they could add pictures? That way the age of the actors doesn’t come into play. But writing and drawing takes kinda long too. I’m sure someone could crack out, I dunno 32 pages or so a month? Have different people working in different teams so they can have concurrent story lines? Charge folks a couple bucks for each story? Man, I bet someone could make millions doing something like that.

  • Variant

    That Superman v Batman moment brought back some Pee Wee’s Playhouse memories

  • Ubik

    Nice ending. Much more thrilling than the “Cap America Civil War” brawl at the end. But I’m with #TeamJay

  • Did you notice that Rich couldn’t get the hammer to work as a metaphor for Thor’s absence from the film?

  • The moment where Rich couldn’t get out of the easy chair was, of course, scripted. But it was a reference to a real-life incident where Rich Evans was stuck in an easy chair for hours and couldn’t figure out how to get up.

    That real-life incident is called every afternoon.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    “No real impact on the world around them” was part of why I liked it.

    No city exploding, no macguffin. Just an intimate fight and some drama.

  • Whales

    Pages? Like things I have to turn to keep getting the story? I dunno, man, I like my stories fed directly through my face to my brain. Turning pages sounds like a lot of unnecessary work.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    While I really loved this film, I went into it with the hope that the great concept from the disappointing comic would be done justice, and a proper story about it would finally be told.

    After seeing the film, I’m still waiting for that to happen.

    You could have removed the Sokovia Accords from this film and it would have changed nothing.

    Luckily, eveything else made up for it.

  • bleurgh

    I wouldn’t describe the villain as great, although I do think that he had a good motivation.

  • bleurgh

    He’s a brilliant scientist and a terrible terrible businessman.

  • Sleverin

    How about the Robert Rodriguez film that no one will see for 100 years. They quickly outdid Boyhood in douchey pretension.

  • Sleverin

    You can hear Jay laughing as Rich is getting squibbed. C’mon you hack frauds, learn to edit your sound better! What next, you’re going to have a boom mic in the frame, or have a clock in the fram jumping minutes or hours between edits?

    HA! NOW I HAVE THE HIGHER GROUND

  • TMC_Sherpa

    Amazon will have you covered. I heard from a reliable source their version of VR will use the same technology as the Kindle paperwhite. Reading is gonna be so awesome!

  • junkevil

    The airport battle did have some sudden tonal changes and also had shaky cam. It’s not the bestest superhero fight in a movie for people who notice and are offput by these things.

    Overall, While I more agree with Jay on this one, I can see the points made by Mike and Rich and I don’t think they’re wrong for having different opinions.

    Also, I’ve seen the movie and I’m not sure it makes my personal top 5 Marvel movies. There have been so many Marvel movies now, and a few really good ones that had a tighter, more focused plot.

  • Ren1

    LOL I got wayyy too much amusement out of Mike blasting Rich with that revolver.

  • RedLetterMediumsDotCorn

    That fight scene deserves some kind of an award or som’n! Feels like they storyboarded it and everything!

  • Skewed_View

    Just further perpetuating the anti-Marvel agenda among critics/fanboys.

  • a_productive_fart

    You’re joking/trolling, right? This film has over 90% on Rotten Tomatoes. The RLM guys are being contrarian, too-cool-for-school.

  • #teamDan

  • This movie even separated RLM! Captain Winsconsin: Critic Hacks

  • Going back a few comic book movies you could see Mike drunkenly making the case for them as harmless, silly, pop corn entertainment. Today he is being critical of them as real movies. This progression is a good review in itself.

  • Bill Semi Liar

    BvS being dark all the wat through shows consistency. Well the wrong kind of consistency since it doesn´t fit to the Superman Character, but that’s what he was refering, I guess. Iron Man on the other hand, was serious and then relaxed (old self) when recruiting Spider Man, then serious again.

  • Yehonatan Liron

    I think the fight here was more interesting than anything in CW. When characters keep getting punched, grunting a bit, wiping a minuscule amount of blood and getting up again, over and over, it starts to get boring. Nothing is at stake. Much like Mike’s comments for the Sucker Punch review.
    Sure, the guys getting hit are super heroes, but they are also getting punched by super heroes.
    With all the huge productions of the MCU, the fight between the Viper and the Mountain on Game of Thrones is more interesting than anything I’ve seen in the MCU. Sure, that fight had more drama going in for it, but also because the swords are sharp, meaning no one is getting up from a cut. I realise the MCU is PG, but it doesn’t have to be so cartoonish.

  • Bill Semi Liar

    Good one. If they hadn’t made the deal with Sony, SM wouldn’t have been there and the airport fight would still have been fun. Imagine Marvel Girl and Dr. Strange movies being released in place of Ant-Man and Spiderman. They are interchangeable, they would have been corporate mandated in this movie. Still, the Russo Bros. are good entertainers.

  • Otto T

    Mr. Plinkett’s walls seem rather wobbly, and his acoustics are cavernous in there.

  • a_productive_fart

    I agree that the film had some pacing and tonal issues, that Spider-Man felt shoehorned in, that the story was perhaps too busy, overstuffed—but not enough to sour the movie for me. It certainly didn’t deserve Mike & Rich’s tag-team, chilly response. And Mike dismissing the action as just guys punching each other still really bothers me—the Russo Bros. are excellent at action choreography, and there are definite emotional stakes in the fighting, built up over the past dozen movies. RLM has generally been positive about the MCU up to this point—why this film would be the one turn them off is beyond me. The question for me was whether or not the Russos could succeed where Joss Whedon failed with ‘Age of Ultron’, which was an unwieldy mess—and they did succeed, overall.

  • Bill Semi Liar

    The thing with number 7, they want you to take this movie individually, but then they tried to add them with Sokovia Accords, where was the incident with Thor in London or the events of Iron Man 3?

  • drogmir

    I’m surprised Rich was complaining about Captain America acting uncharacteristically and picking the wrong side of the accords, especially right after watching The Winter Soldier.

    The entire take away plot from the Winter Soldier that Captain America walked away with, was that his higher superior authority figures at SHIELD were advancing Hydra’s plans for years without anyone catching on to it. Of course he’s not going to be signing the accords giving the avengers over to some kind of vague UN council group.

    If anything Iron Man’s reasoning is a little bit more shaky since the whole tone of Iron Man 2 was the government trying to get him to work for them and he’s resisting the whole way. They really had to push that personal guilt angle and fallout of Age of Ultron to get Iron Man to be for the accords.

  • Bill Semi Liar

    I liked the movie, just as Jay did. No, it’s not the greatest thing ever by far. It suffered from the same issues BvS did.
    -Corporate Mandate characters
    -Setup for other movies within the same universe.
    -A more serious tone.
    -Not a essential villain motivation.
    -Nothing risky happens.
    As a fan of Community and Arrested Development this was streets ahead better than BvS. I fear the Russo Bros might suffer from the same Stress Whedon went through in AoU for the Thanos movie.
    Sadly, Snyder is still directing the JL.

  • Evertale

    They make the small movies known and the big ones entertaining :=)

  • CapedBaldy

    SPOILERS BITCHES

    Ok. So here we go.

    1. This fails as a Civil War adaptation. Why? Because in the comics it’s a big stakes event. Iron Man is the George Bush bringing down the patriot act on the other heros with the full weight of the Gov.

    Here.. we just have one old guy saying the world is sick of their shit. What shit exactly? Saving millions? Yeah maybe a few hundred people died.. but thousands and thousands would die if they hadn’t gotten shit done. THEY DID NOT do a good job creating any stakes for not joining Iron Man, and they did a shitty job of establishing that they were rogue in the first place. The gov. here obviously had no power to stop these guys if they didn’t want to be stopped. And they didn’t establish a good reason to stop them like in the comics when there is a 9/11 level event.

    Marvel films have NO stakes. Nobody dies. Nobody ever dies. Not even War Machine died for fucks sake. Another poor adaptation element.

    The tone was all over the place too. Kinda funny. Kind of dark. Actiony. IDK.. it was mostly boring.

    2. The things I liked was the middle fight with all the Heros. Much like the Hulkbuster fight in Ultron was the best part of that film. Which is a worrying trend if you ask me. But yeah it as mega, and I loved every second of it. This is what we want in superhero movies, not fucking red tape and moral hand wringing if it’s not properly handled.

    Black Panther was awesome. Ant-man was great. I loved Spidey. Great take on him.

    But yeah the Winter Solider subplot was so worked over and boring. Idk.

    It was a bit better than BVS, based on pure spectacle and slickness… but not by much. It wasn’t really that much funnier but it did blend a bit better. It also felt a lot like two movies slammed together.

    Overall it’s a solid 65 out of 100, or 3 stars or whatever.

  • CA:CW Score:Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • RLMkeepitup

    aunt may is hot naow. + 1 tomato!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I don’t think it ever intended to adapt the Civil War book.

    Which again, is good. Because the book F*CKING SUCCKZZZZZZZZZZZZSSSSSZZZSSZZSZZSZSZZZ.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    They also could’ve just made it about the Scarlet Witch

    “She needs to answer for her crime! She needs to be held accountable!”

    Cap: “No! F*ck you guys!”

    And then they fight.

    No need for political bullshizz.

  • CapedBaldy

    At least it made sense. There were clear stakes and consequences. This was just a playground bitch slap.

  • Dan

    I love half in the bag, but boy I don’t care about super hero movies or comics. I’m surprised anyone over 14 can enjoy these, unless it’s some kind of nostalgia thing. Can I make my patreon dollar not go to a super hero movie review.

  • Sloth

    Comix is for kids.
    Plus all these movies are the same.
    I wish they’d spend their time reviewing something else.

  • CapedBaldy

    These reviews bring more comments and views. It’s business. haha.

  • Sloth

    I don’t think they get paid per comment.
    I could be wrong.
    But I’m pretty sure it doesn’t work that way.

  • If they did they wouldn’t have let the regulars leave.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    “I love half in the bag, but don’t care about superhero movies” is basically an oxymoron at this point.

    Unless they’re reviewing Stah Wah.

  • Sloth

    We can leave?!
    I was unaware that was an option.

  • Sloth

    Is it though?
    Take a look at the recent episodes.
    Green Room, Hardcore Henry, Me Him Her, 10 Cloverfield Lane.
    Not Star Wars or Comix movies.
    But they like to sprinkle in the comix stuff cuz to attract the childrens.
    That’s why they review movies where grown men in spandex punch each other in the face for two hours.
    And oh yeah! Splosions!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I’m just bein’ tharcastic.

    But they’ve clearly lost interest in this stuff.

  • Sloth

    I think Rich is the only one still interested.
    That’s why they’re including him more.
    To keep the conversation going.
    Jay seems like he could care less.
    And Mike is downright apathetic about the Comix Movies now.
    Maybe Marvel will soon replace Adam Sandler as their primary target of hate.

  • I walked past a CA:CW poster again and as usual I vomited like crazy. But this time I took some vomit and rubbed it in my eyes. It burns but I am very very relieved.

    #HealthTip

  • CapedBaldy

    I mean.. it generates page hits for ads and things. Not comment counts. You gotta do popular stuff as with any successful channel. If they only did obscure art-school movies nobody would give a fuck.

  • CapedBaldy

    #teamMikeRICH

  • Ultimate Alliance 2 is still the best straight up version of Civil War. And it wasn’t even that great of a game.

  • Andrew

    I liked the movie and thought it was really great. Definitely better than Ultron. Spoilers to follow.

    What I liked best about it was that it wasn’t about some big monster they have to fight or some other organization trying to take over the world. It’s just about some guy trying to get revenge on them. Sure he does it in a convoluted way, and his motivation was weak, but it was refreshing to not have a giant fight at the end.

    Instead the big fight was in the middle, and by the time we get to the end of the movie, it’s just Captain and Ironman (and whatshisface). But it was more of an emotional climax than a physical one. When they got to the secret base after Zemo and entered the room with the supersoldiers, all I could think was “here we go again”, but when his real plan was reveal, I was pleasantly surprised.

    Which ties into another reason I like the movie; the bad guy essentially wins at the end. The Avengers are torn apart. Despite all their ingenuity, they were ‘defeated’. This keeps things from getting boring and stale. The heroes fight the big monster and win at the end, the heroes fight the big monster and win at the end, the heroes fight the big monster and win at the end, etc. Boring. Having them lose shows us that they aren’t infallible and it raises the stakes by making us question if they can really pull off victory against Thanos or whoever is next.

  • Ren1

    I honestly have not seen a single superhero movie that they have reviewed, but I still enjoy the analysis and the banter.

  • Malevolence

    Essentially is the Batman vs Superman plot tweeked and delivered by a capable Director. Tony Stark is Batman, Captain America and Winter Soldier are Superman, Mysterious Agenda Man is Lex Luthor.

    Avengers are brought to realize the consequences and collateral damage from their actions.

    Tony Stark coming out and Avengers in general set off a cascade of enhanced people revealing themselves

    Bucky is framed with an explosion which sets off controversy and splits Tony and Captain America and a manhunt for bucky

    Twist – The doomsday(s) of the film were murdered instead of unleashed.

    Reveal that the Lex Luthor of the film orchestrated all this to have the Avengers fight eachother

  • emily_waves

    Funny how Jay is usually the hipster that loves indie crap, and Mike usually the one that likes easy to follow entertaining films. And yet, Jay is the one completely defending this, while Mike is more indifferent about it.

    In context of what everyone else thinks too (most people seem to think this is a well crafted action blockbuster)…you would just think Mike would really like this, and it would be Jay that was more indifferent. But NOPE.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    It looks like Mike finally hit the Comic Movie Fatigue Wall… Really hard.
    Maybe he is finally angry enough to finish the TFA Plinkett review.

  • Malevolence

    Rich is still suffering the effects of watching Batman vs Superman…. thinking the overseeing of Superman situation is similar to the overseeing of the Avengers situation

  • Skewed_View

    Yes, I’m joking. I also thought Civil War was really good, although I like the first two Captain America movies a bit more.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    The “going against the formula” bit I just can’t agree with.

    Gotta change it up before it gets stale, rather than waiting for it to get stale and then changing it up. If this were another Avengers adventure with a macguffin and a monster I would’ve rolled my eyes, gone to sleep and woken up in a gas station bathroom.

    Also enjoyed Iron Man getting a little more menacing and adding some believable depth to his character. If it’s another eccentric quippy playboy performance amid issues that are diving the Avengers, he becomes a Star Trek: Into Darkness cartoon character. It’s nice to know these characters can change and do different shit.

  • Noah R.

    I sided more with Cap in this movie. Like Mike mentioned, when you’re literally preventing worldwide destruction at the hands of the ultimate evil, it’s going to be a BIT hard to avoid collateral damage, period.

    Overall though, the movie was pretty good, though nothing special.

  • Noah R.

    I agree.

    There was almost no weight to the main point of division in the group. It felt horribly forced to e. At the end of the day some people get hurt and some egos get damaged but really, that’s about it.

  • Noah R.

    Vape naysch //

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Out of the examples that General Ross showed only Ultron was entirely The Avengers fault (or more precisely Iron Man’s fault). I guess you could argue that Loki would’ve never brought the Chitauri had Thor never visited Earth in the first place. Can’t see how what Hydra did in Washington D.C. can be blamed on Captain America or the Avengers.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Mike lost the argument when he brought up Age of Ultron, and claimed to like it better.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Much in the same way that Age of Ultron movie apparently had nothing to do with the comic crossover (never read the comics, but that’s what I’ve come to understand). The movies are just borrowing these cool comic titles, and in a bit of marketing synergy they figure the announcement of the movies will boost sales of the trades collecting the namesake comics series.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    Also a good call, because the Age of Ultron comic sucked even harder than Civil War.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    the wikipedia synopsis makes it sound like a clusterfuck. Comics from the “Big 2” these days are so number 2.

  • Noah R.

    I believe the argument was made that the Avengers simply being on Earth and fighting back is making things worse. Doesn’t make any sense to me but I guess somebody thought it did 😛

  • CapedBaldy

    Capable for children? No stakes or consequences. Nobody dies. Same damn film as AOU. 2 hours of crap with a 20 minute fight in the middle. haha

  • CapedBaldy

    I think he’s just sick of the movies. When you’re tired of the guys punching each other – comic movies arent for you haha

  • CapedBaldy

    Yeah but if nobody dies and nothing real changes.. what good is character development? They aren’t even really telling stories here. They didn’t even wrap up the Winter Soldier story. Its just teased out fan service and letting popular actors do what they want to keep them happy.

  • CapedBaldy

    The argument made no sense on either side because there was no real moment that would push the viewer to side with either side. haha. NO tragedy, no civil war. This should have been Avengers: Mild disagreement.

  • Paul S.

    confirmed for jay

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I disagree with the “people have to die” thing.

    If anything I’m a little sick of that being used for cheap drama.

    The character development was worthwhile because it’s what made the last fight scene exciting. It was what made the film for me; the emotional states of both Cap and Tony as they’re fighting each other. It’s what made me care.

    How did nothing change? The Avengers basically split apart and hate each other now. Fairly substabtial change.

  • G. Xiong

    Yup gotta side with #TeamJay the guy makes great points, Mike just seems done with the superhero movies which makes sense with so many of them. Rich was just straight up odd, tried way too hard to turn everything into a bit without bring anything to the conversation.

  • Mikkel Rasmussen

    You are like REALLY busy trashing this movie in comments 🙂

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    What is going on with the Rich hate? Rich is God. For he is the Alpha and the Omega.

  • Seth

    Who’s that bald fucker?

    Goddamn finals, I’m like 4-5 behind on HiTB and can’t watch any for weeeeekth.

  • etiennes

    What could be the reason the TFA Plinkett review is taking so long? I mean HITB is okay but the boys know what we really want from them. It’s like when

  • tOmy`

    Wait, this ain’t no Radiohead review.

    UNSUBSCRIBED.

  • Ogrot

    Man, Jack’s been working out and cultivating a righteous beard. Great job!

  • CapedBaldy

    Yes. With my 56k modem it takes about 30 minutes per comment. I’m working hard.

  • CapedBaldy

    The comic has giant man die in the big fight and this forces more people to different sides. Thor also dies at the start which sparks the need for Spider-man. This is shit-tier story telling. It’s like some bros had a little scuffle on the playground and then hugged it out.

    Substantial for idiots I guess.

  • Jerome Gorden

    I can certainly sympathize with the “comic book fatigue” issue, but each movie should be evaluated on its own merits.

  • Johan Wernquist

    People! Stop discussing the MOVIE! Keep this thread clean please.

  • Omis

    I think Marvel’s mistake is dragging out the Thanos storyline. We are 11 movies in and we don’t know much more than we did in the first avengers movie. What they should have done is treat each phase like a television season, with the avengers movie as the season finale. Each season raise the stakes until we get to the infinity war. Then end it. Because there’s nothing more annoying than a story that doesn’t end. I think that is where the fatigue is coming from.

  • cucadandi

    This review certainly didn’t pull any punches?

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    CopyRight is killing the internet. I’m so angry I would smash my computer… but I cant afford a new one.

  • cucadandi

    Easy solution: Smash someone else’s computer.

  • cucadandi

    That would mean less money. Besides, the general audiences certainly don’t seem to be suffering from super hero fatigue. Only us pretentious frauds on the internet have this problem.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    YES!…. Where do you live?

  • cucadandi

    OOHHH FUUUUUUUCKKKKKK

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    Relax I’m Australian and it would probably take years to swim to you from here.

  • cucadandi

    Am I the only one willing to pay good money for a Plinkett Review of 9/11? I really feel like this needs to happen amirite?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    From what I understand, the first movie that should deal seriously with Thanos will be Thor 3 (Thanos and Hulk might be enough to boost Thor’s sagging series). One would guess GotG 2 should too, but according to James Gunn they aren’t. It’s possible that Doctor Strange ends up having something to do with the Infinity Stones, but not Thanos.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    But rememeber how in WW2 Red Skull and Hydra had the Cosmic Cube, even before Captain America was created? The Avengers weren’t around back then, but superpowered evil doers were.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Hate, hate, hate each other… not really. In the very end Cap’s letter is pretty much an apology of sorts, and Stark keeping Gen. Ross on hold pretty much means he is starting to forgive.

  • Omis

    No people at work are starting to complain. It’s getting more and more prevalent.

  • cucadandi

    Is the first sentence missing a comma/period?

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    They’re still fractured though. It’s anything but rainbows and sunshine.

  • Captain Hackfraud

    I guess you’re right, the new governing board wouldn’t consist of people he knows or trusts,and there are not even military. I also dimly remember the scene aboard the Shield Sky fortress (or whatever it’s called) where Cap wanderer about and discovered the secret weapons project, while Stark at the same time was hacking into shield.net or something. That’s what so confusing about Stark’s stance to me now. He has always had problems with authority, is an ego driven guy and had was rather sceptical and suspicious of organisations like Shield in the past. Why would he submit to a higher authority now? I can understand why the Ultron fiasco made him doubt himself and loose faith in his infallibility but signing this accord will only shift official responsibility, it will not leviate the moral burden he seems to carry.

  • Omis

    It got held up in customs.

  • Joe333

    Jack must have taken a bunch of steroids since last episode

  • Captain Hackfraud

    It was good, no doubt. For people who are looking for a good marvel/superphero movie it is a definite must. For people who are just looking for a good movie, it’s 50/50, I think. There are not many I would put above this, the Ironman series, Avengers 1. Maybe Deadpool and Guardians but they are almost a different matter. I didn’t like Ultron very much, I admit, though the quicksilver sequence was sublime.

  • caye74

    I am confused, which webzone is this?

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    both.

  • caye74

    Movie? What movie? I thought this was lawnmower forum

  • GriefClownVenom

    Judging by the Pre Rec streams from well before the movie’s release, Rich believed Cap’s Civil War arc was going to be uncharacteristic based solely on the fact that he’s a soldier and should follow orders. Then he saw Winter Soldier a few days before CW but I guess he managed to miss… everything?

  • slick moranis

    Spider-Man was my favorite part. Finally Peter was done right in a movie. Zemo, story-wise was the best element and character for me. I honestly would’ve preferred a movie of him going about his plan rather with the Avengers as auxiliary characters. But as it, it’s a great comic book movie. Scarlet Witch and Winter Soldier were the weakest points to me.

  • GriefClownVenom

    I felt the “tonal shift” of the airport fight was appropriate – it begins with friends/allies trying to reason with each other because they don’t want to hurt one another, but both sides have a clear and serious objective they need to accomplish (escape vs prevent escape) and I loved how the intensity ramped up as the sides came closer to their objectives.

    Yes, Vision, Iron Man and War Machine could have ripped Team Cap to shreds in moments if this was a true “war”. Is that seriously the kind of movie Civil War’s detractors are hoping for? The movie did a great job making the fight impactful while keeping the characters fun (i.e. not callous murderers).

    Also half of the characters are now on the lam and have a grudge against Tony, who is in a questionable mental state at the end of the conflict (along with injured Rhodey and confused Vision). The film does a fine job showing fallout without resorting to cheap kills like Coulson and Quicksilver.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    I liked Spider-Man in this movie. That’s it.

  • Bob Borries

    Wait, this movie is based on comic books? Those super-hero rags displayed next to porn mags at skanky liquor stores, that pre-teen brats cry for they’re parents to buy them for them? Comic books that have a lot less pages than a real book, third grade level english and crappy newsprint ink that sticks to your fingers?

  • MonkeyKing1969

    The problem with Winter Soldier and this movie is the audience has zero stake in Bucky. He was a bit character friend in that the movies WANT to be important but they never let the audience care. Nobody cares if Cap saves Bucky, because ol’ Winter Soldier is the most sour, dour dude in all the movies he appears in. Kill Bucky and let him stay dead.

  • Rob Peterson

    I’m so glad to hear that Mike is starting to become “done with superhero movies”…I hope that means RLM stops reviewing so many of them.

    I always get a throbbing boner whenever I see new content on RLM, but then I go soft and droopy when I see the newest video has them talking about another fucking superhero movie. I hope this is a turning point for RLM…I truly do.

  • Andy James

    You forgot to include the word ‘bitch’.

  • I think the problem with the anti-government control argument that they completely failed to get across is that the biggest reason they shouldn’t be controlled by a government is due to the events in Winter soldier… a government organization was almost completely taken over by bad guys. If it can happen to SHIELD, why not the UN?

  • fred

    $$$$ the thing about these super-duper movies is that a lot of people keep watching them.

    — besides, they did just talk about Green Room.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    God YES! THIS!

  • bloodstock pussyclarts

    its like how youd expect captain america to side with america but instead he hates freedom. its like poetry it rhymes hail satan

  • Traitor! B A N N E D !

  • Bubs

    Come join us at the Amazing World of Tapeworms, fred. Otherwise known as the real RLM comment zone.

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    I’m the comentor RLM deserves.

  • tOmy`

    So according to BDM, we now know what was Ben Affleck thinking during the “Hello darkness my old friend” video:

    “Affleck was incredibly unhappy about the reception of BvS. He felt humiliated after spending so much of the press tour saying how much better this film would be than Daredevil”

  • NOT! andrew thompson

    Come home! we are waiting for you!

  • junkevil

    Except the real comment zone is the one moderated and run by RLM. The other one is just where you go when you want to know about the latest radiohead album and which buttplugs to insert while you listen. It’s where every comment gets an upvote from the same few people who aspire to be nothing more than a hivemind. It’s where they talk trash about this very comment section but still can’t seem to help posting here.

    Anyways, You shouldn’t refer to Tapeworms place as the real RLM, comment zone or otherwise. You should call it the sad ex-girlfriend channel. It fits because you feel like you were wronged by your beau, and then you walked away like the strong women you are, swearing that you’d never come back. But when they didn’t actually give a shit, you came back to go on about how great it is elsewhere…

    If it’s so great there, then why are you even here, Cindy? FFS LADY, MOVE ON ALREADY.

  • Aaron Nagy

    Uhhh we didn’t come out of the great depression until after the war started and FDR got together with the big businesses and asked for their help. Don’t forget culture wasn’t monolithic and there were still a large number of people who really liked Coolidge and thought that the New Deal was extending the great depression.

  • Malevolence

    Oh Rich, you fascist

  • OMNI

    This whole onslaught of MCU movies is just completely uninteresting. I’ve seen a couple of the first wave of movies. I am however looking forward to seeing a new Spiderman movie, and I hope it’s done correctly this time.
    I also hope that someone gets the Fantastic four right as well, but that sadly seems like a lost cause. I’ll just stick to the Corman movie I guess.
    Anyone hear anything about Doctor Strange?

  • OMNI

    It didn’t take long for the “God” powers we gave him to turn him into a dangerous menace against humankind…

  • OMNI

    Upvoted because it’s true, sad but true…

  • Skewed_View

    I really disliked Batman v Superman, but it’s probably better than Daredevil. Right? I haven’t seen Daredevil since the one time in the theater, but I’m almost certain it has to be the worse movie between the two.

    On the other hand, I don’t remember feeling miserable during Daredevil, but that was a long time ago so maybe I’ve just blocked it out.

  • EricD123

    So did I, and I agree that it’s the best depiction of him yet. I think he would probably have beaten Capt America in a one on one though. He is after all, much stronger, faster, has the spidy sense and the web.

    Also very happy that they went with web shooters rather than glands. (Protip: if you pseudo mutate towards being a spider, the web glands wont end up in your wrists.)

    Sorry about nerding out.

  • dollar store cashier wife

    why did you lied about getting banned there? nobody ever got banned there aside from some spam bots. your seem about 50x times more angry about all this then we ever were. does RLM pays you or something? well you enjoy your ‘real’ comment zone. you seem to be contributing to it and enjoying it so much…

  • Tapeworm

    Hivemind of what exactly, bullshit? Nobody is forcing you to comment anywhere and I wonder what is sadder, commenting and upvoting between a small group of people or apparently reading it and then ranting for two paragraphs about how pathetic it is.

  • Red Skeleton

    So…. where is the Eurovision party? Or are you saving it for the STUPID finals?

  • Red Skeleton

    Haw haw, get it? A Greek Wrap? That was top-notch Eurovision humor.

  • tOmy`

    That made me laugh so much I don’t even know where to start. You obviously gave it a lot of thought because, apparently, you seem to have even more information about that place than the goddamn mods.

    1) Nobody swore they won’t ever return. At least I myself don’t remember ever saying that.
    2) That place was up for ages now, because we don’t want to spam this webzone with even more useless / personal stuff. I think you can see the reasoning behind that. It wasn’t created for any “sad ex-girlfriend” reason, it was created to take some strain away from this very section – a thing some of you asked for.
    3) Of course they wouldn’t give a shit, none of us was ever under any other impression.

    I think you majorly missed the point, but that’s okay. Thanks for reading my review, tho!

  • I like the hive mind and I think it solves the problem with us not cluttering up RLM. Radiohead is pretty much all we talk about. That an Bill Cosby. Well anyway remember to smoke inorder to look cool in front of your friends. Say yes to peer pressure. XoXo

  • tOmy`

    You know, I think we don’t talk about Radiohead enough.

    But I will leave that to the peer review.

  • 4. Mandatory upvote cus Bill Cosby.

  • tOmy`

    You put the A game back into rApe.

  • Sully

    Sad ex-girlfriend? Does that make you desperate friend zoned asshole? And to think… I MADE AN AVATAR FOR YOU!! FOR YOU!!! Ef Oh Ar Why Oh You!!

    Pound Sign: Recycle

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Don’t forget Casual Encounters and how to deal with anal seepage…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Who is that thing?

  • Nordquist

    But wait! There’s more! Call now and we will double that offer just pay *separate shipping and handling*.

  • Red Skeleton

    Well i just missed like 14 songs due to fussy children. My wife tells me I missed nothing… hrm, the semi-finals are usually the better shows too.

  • Nordquist

    #Hivemind

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    #doucheshaming

  • tOmy`

    I don’t think he is a Radiohead fan.

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    2/10; just a young troll

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Probably doesn’t like Pitchfork either…

  • tOmy`

    Pitchfork is 6/10 lately.

    – Pitchfork

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I would post a link, buttttt:
    Pitchfork gives the medium of music a 7/10,
    needs to try harder.

  • I just have one thing to say: eat a bag of dicks.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    The only one worth your while was San Marino’s. That was greaaat!

  • Sully

    Douche Shaming, like fat shaming, is completely acceptable.

  • Sully

    Do I look like a bee, ya fuckin’ bumble biotch!

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    There is a cabbage patch in it, that’s all I know so far.

  • Sheriff Mitchell

    I’m commenting both here and there, not because of any of allegiances or whatever, but because both are entertaining and worth giving a glance.

    I’m like the Black Widow in this Civil War.

    Or like that dumbass sidekick in Crystal Skull.

    I’m a double agent, but I don’t know I’m a double agent. I forgot what side I’m on.

    Wait.

    Who the f*ck are you?

  • Red Skeleton

    Dan Marino? Who do I look like, Ace Ventura?

  • WrongWithYourFace

    What can you say? You’re a capitalist.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    But seriously, let’s take a breath here, fellas.

    I get why the regulars are miffed, and I get why a good fella like you would feel the way you do.

    But there’s no need for a pissing match between commenters here, gents.

    No need to whip it out and see whose is bigger.

    Because it’s mine.

  • Commander X

    From Vanity Fair, one person complains about the REAL problem with “Civil War”

    “As if to put the nail in the coffin of speculation, Bucky and Cap paused for a moment in the middle of snowy Siberia to reminisce about their days chasing skirts in pre-War Brooklyn”…“It’s a sweet, human bonding moment but one that also bristles with heterosexual virility. If Disney isn’t inclined to give audiences a gay superhero, couldn’t they have at least left us the dream of Bucky and Cap? … Doesn’t ‘Captain America: Civil War’ go out of its way to “define” Bucky and Steve’s relationship when Cap smooches Sharon Carter (Emily VanCamp) while Bucky looks on approvingly? Where’s the room for interpretation in that moment?”

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    It’s called having a case of the Notgays.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    Where is your Radiohead review?

  • BNN667

    That has to be one of the most idiotic things I’ve ever read. They’ve always been friends/brothers, which is displayed many times in all three film. The scene of them reminiscing about chasing skirts, or how things were before this horrible mess, is in there to show that these two friends/brothers care deeply for each other, and in all likelihood would give their life for one another. Which not only pays off moments later but is also the thread holding all 3 Cap Films together. I can’t even say anything else because saying anything else gets me too close to ACTUALLY having a conversation about how Cap and Bucky should/could be gay, and I just won’t. There are plenty of other Heroes who could possibly be gay with far less history standing against them, why not try and find them?

  • tOmy`

    You’re just saying that because you’re in a band.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    When you’ve put out one fire, you’ve put out all of ’em.

    You think you guys are a handful? Meet my bassist.

  • OMNI

    You mean a Cumberbun?

  • tOmy`

    I am gonna play the “I used to admin / referee competitive gaming matches” card.

    The pain is real.

  • What’s unacceptable is fat people. What?

  • Ogrot

    Capn – I had to go up to the helicarrier with Bucky to stop Dr. Doom.

    Sharon – Don’t try and fool me no more, Cap; I know what it means! Bucky Barnes. Buck Nasty! You didn’t go up there to fight crime!

  • Ogrot

    I will concur that Rich is right about Spiderman. This iteration, the little that we got, felt right. He was out of place in this film, but he does seem promising for a proper Spiderman movie. He’s quippy like Spiderman should be, but has the awkward teenage presence a teenage Spiderman aught to have. A combination of joy and excitement for the new world his powers have brought him, coupled with the awkward bumbling of youth.

  • Sully

    Co-wrekt!

  • Captain Turbo

    Whatta they mean no gay superheroes? Deadpool is gay, right? Right?

  • CapedBaldy

    No I didn’t.

  • fred

    uh — ok.

  • Thanatos2k

    What I don’t get is why Captain America didn’t sign the agreement and then continue what he was doing anyways approval or not. It’s what he was going to do regardless, and signing the approval would have at least temporarily placated people.

    In fact, the agreement talks getting attacked by terrorists should have been used by Cap as proof that terrorists aren’t going to sit around and wait for approvals! Yet he just bumbles off because gotta save Bucky friend nonsense.

  • Thanatos2k

    Thor and Hulk are like 2/5 of the important people in the Avengers, and they weren’t even in the movie and have no reason to hate anyone.

    Oh no, Hawkeye and Black Widow have issues! No one cares.

  • Thanatos2k

    When he finally gave up on it and went “Oh!” I thought he was going to pull another hammer from behind his back.

  • Thanatos2k

    That was my favorite part of the movie. It was also when I wanted my money back.

  • Thanatos2k

    Yeah, why should the audience care if a MURDERING TERRORIST dies? Oh no, Captain America will be sad for a while, but he’ll get over it, just like he gets over the death of agent Carter in three minutes (and despicably immediately wants to get into the pants of her GRANDDAUGHTER. How creepy is that)

    Even near the end of the film Bucky’s like “Yeah, I’m a criminal who belongs in jail.” Bucky should have just committed suicide to prevent him from being brainwashed into murderer mode again and saved everyone the trouble.

  • Thanatos2k

    Bucky blowing up the UN is ironically evidence for the opposite – terrorists not giving a shit about waiting for the UN to make motions and sign documents to send out the Avengers.

    It would have been the perfect evidence for Captain America to shove back in their faces about why their proposal was nonsense, but he was too stupid to notice and already babbling about Bucky.

  • Thanatos2k

    The fact that they even try to pretend like she did anything wrong is another problem. She basically threw an exploding grenade away from herself and a huge crowd of people. She was clearly saving lives by doing it. It would be like getting shot at, deflecting the bullet, and being responsible for the bullet bouncing around and then killing someone. The person who fired the bullet (or blew themselves up in this case) is to blame.

    They make a better point in the review that they should have done something clearly negligent. If they had been fighting terrorist guy in an open area and not a huge crowd of people, then Scarlet Witch tossing the bomb guy away from herself and Captain America and taking out a building would be basically throwing the danger away from themselves alone and not caring where it landed. THAT would have made some sense to be mad at her for.

  • Thanatos2k

    The problem is you think rottentomatoes is supposed to be a quality metric. It is not. The score is basically a percentage of people that recommend seeing the film. It’s a thumbs up/thumbs down meter, not a “This movie is 6/10”.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    Eh, they all count as Avengers to me. Might as well.

    I think the only real mistake was Cap breaking them out at the end. Kind of deflated the big fight that came before it.

  • kylemz

    It’s basically a religion now, and I wonder why don’t they just rewrite the Bible for themselves, making it all about gays. That is the type of thing that should be a satirical comment poking fun at what is basically a non-violent Maoist revolution, seeking to make basically everything in life revolve around gays. Why don’t they just go all the way and ban anything that’s about heterosexuals?

  • junkevil

    I’ll remove said avatar. I didn’t realize that using it meant I was no longer free to speak my mind or criticize things. I don’t like censorship much, and I didn’t realize that’s what you were selling.

  • Thanatos2k

    Sparks fly out of Rich whenever he gets shot. He’s like a Power Ranger.

  • junkevil

    Okay, sounds like a good idea. I don’t know what one looks like though, can you add an image so I know what I’m looking for?

  • junkevil

    I didn’t? I did imply that the comments section over there would ban users outside of their sphere on sight, and it’s true that I didn’t really have a basis to make such a statement. But I never said that I had been banned.

    That comment was also removed by a mod for some reason, but it’s still in my comment history and I can screenshot it if you like?

    Also, I’m not angry, and don’t have anything against any of you. I’m also not paid by RLM, they don’t even pay Wizard.

  • junkevil

    You know, I mostly skimmed it, but overall it really seemed like the shitposts from this comment zone had ended up over there and it’s now apparently being touted as the real comment section.

    And yeah, you’re right, man. How dare someone experience something and then go on to express what they thought about it? That’s just sad.

  • Enjoy.
    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)┌∩┐

  • Tapeworm

    It is actually, since it’s other people talking and you decided to shit on it for no other reason than to be an asshole (not to mention lying about being banned, like you’re 12 and looking for attention). If the planet you live on is this miserable, I don’t think I can say anything that would make your life worse, do go on being you.

  • junkevil

    I never lied about being banned, that statement is itself a lie and I can prove that.

    Also, People talking was a thing that got advertised as the real comment section of RLM. I honestly have no issue with it existing, but calling it the real RLM comment section when it’s really just the shitposts gave me enough of a reason to make a post that I actually thought was fairly jovial.

  • Tapeworm

    And you fail to see the jovial nature of calling it a real RLM comment section? Also, yes, you didn’t say you were banned, I remember now, however you were warning people about being banned there, which is another made up fact – for no reason. I don’t know about others, but there’s no element of conflict between comment sections (that’s actually a ridiculous idea) from my side, just providing an extra space for people to express themselves.

  • junkevil

    Again, I skimmed, but I read at least a couple posts where the content of the post was nothing but being derogatory to the people posting here. Nerds talking about the actual topic or something. If there is no element of conflict, why does it seem that some of your users have an us vs them mentality?

  • Red Skeleton

    TeamFourStar, aka TFSGaming, the makers of Dragonball Z abridged, are playing/talking about the PS1 Star Wars, The Phantom Menace game.
    [Insert link here]

    I remember playing this after the first movie came out. I beat it. And by I beat it I mean I got to the part where you have to follow Jar Jar Binks, I “force ran” up to him and killed him with my light sabre. I declared the game “beaten” after that.

    Little did I know that years later, when Episode 3: Fighting Over Lava came out it would turn out I really DID save the Star Wars universe back then.

  • Tapeworm

    Well some of them have actually been banned from here, without a reason and that happens to be true. I’m not happy about any us vs. them mentality in any situation, but the other thing is – neither of us has to care. I don’t go on this board anymore (I was summoned by someone mentioning my name in a derrogatory post). Let’s do it like this, we will think that the other one is an asshole, but don’t interact with each other anymore. That way we shall remain happy. I can’t tell others what they should do though.

  • junkevil

    I never said I thought you were an asshole, and I don’t even really think you are one. But let me just get this right, I made a post where the most derogatory thing I said about your webzone is that they aspire for hive mind status and now you’re literally telling me what I should think and how I should act? Are you being serious right now?

    I also only mentioned your name because it’s the name of the disqus board. It didn’t come up because I was singling you out to be malicious or something.

  • Tapeworm

    I’m never serious, unless I am. Have a serviceable day.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Yep

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    It was only an invitation from one person to another. are you jealous that we dont want you?

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Ahem… Standing right here dude.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    I defended you over that. It was clearly joke aimed at Michel Colon for being a dickbag. but… now your being the dickbag. play nice.

  • junkevil

    Yeah, see, that statement would work better if this were the only time you guys were spamming about the channel. It’s not though, not by a long shot. At least you have the balls to admit that it’s not an open to everyone community. Good on you.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    It is come argue with us there. if anyone tries to ban you I will reverse it. just watch the swearing, we cant stop that being blocked.

  • junkevil

    I feel like this is a good time to link that old ford van, covered in rust and dirt, with the message free candy written on it. If only I could link that image, then I could put a zinger right below it and BAM. I’m not sure what the zinger would be, but oh boy is it a good one.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Do it, you know where.

  • junkevil

    I had a conversation with a worm of tape not long ago and he ended the chat by saying that he thinks I’m and asshole and he’d rather never interact with me online again. He also insisted that there is no us vs them mentality, so there wouldn’t be much to argue about. Between you and me and everyone else who reads this, I don’t think he cares too much for me and if he’s really this stressed out over a guys opinion on the internet then maybe I should wait for another time, or you should pick another place. Thanks for the invite and kind words though.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Look Tape has to do the Mod job of RLM now, and you were a dick about it. I’m a huge dick but I can at least say sorry.

  • Screw you you non smoking dirt pecker wienie tod jerk face AIDS infested dung pile. Shut your jap trap you surly gopher fart smelling beaver nose.

  • You hemorrhoid cream wearing non smoking rat eating dirty elephant exploiter.

  • You clutter brain non smoking dung heap. Just looking at you and your lowlife ill conceived face makes me vomit.

  • junkevil

    Right back at ya!

  • Come get some rat breath. It’s clobbering time.

  • What’s the matter? Afraid of a little Gungin pummeling? Yea, thought so beaver boy. Thought so. HAHAHAHA!

  • C’MON! Engage!

  • junkevil

    At what point should I have apologized, in your assessment?

  • People don’t like Tobey and his dance number in SM3? To me that is Spiderman.

  • The readers of Vanity Fair must have high IQ’s. Whatever that is?

  • Sully

    The issue is there’s nothing to criticize. It’s an open forum. Only spam bots get the boot.
    Not liking censorship is why the other comment zone was created in the first place. There we’re free to post links, gifs, and just ramble on about dumb shit we’ve seen or heard across these vast interwebs without the fear of having a comment deleted or pushed into the “mod approval” pile… unless you drop too many f-bombs of course, but there’s nothing we can do about that. That’s disqus, not any one of us.

  • “You leave the UN building alone Bucky”

    -Captain America

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    About now. or you can argue with the next me. I can literally do this for years.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Banned!

  • tOmy`

    Man, I wish I could join this conversation properly, but I still haven’t seen the movie (nor the HitB).

    Keep nerding out, I wanna know more once I finally see it.

  • tOmy`

    He is bisexual, if I remember correctly.

    Constantine as well and boy oh boy, did they have to find a clever wink wink situation to sneak it past the censors during the TV show run.

  • tOmy`

    Uhm, we mentioned that channel many times. We also made pretty clear that if any of you follow any of us, you can see our other hanging out spots. I even followed some of the other regular people here as to give them a little bit of a nudge to follow me / us back in case they wanna drop by.

    The link to the channel is in TheManhole message of the day for weeks now – everyone is invited and anyone can come in.

    This is not the first time I hear that we created some sort of a VIP club and that is simply not true. When we were politely asked (or banned or restricted) to not talk about some of the stuff here, we moved it elsewhere. Months ago. Almost every TheManhole event was promoted here. I even posted a link to my own twitch stream marathon (granted, that one got removed faster than you can say Pre-Rec).

    The inclusion was always name of the game of everything we do here because we do it for the community and as a community. Hope this clears things up for you a bit.

  • junkevil

    And to whom and for what am I apologizing? I’m ultimately not sorry for having an opinion, or for posting it on the internet. Should I apologize for saying the other place isn’t the real RLM? Should I apologize for calling the majority of content there shitposts? Is it the sad ex bit? It’s not like I made a personal attack against one person, and when I was talking to the aforementioned worm, I was trying to be polite. So, yeah, may as well start arguing.

  • ReallyNotAndrew Thompson.

    Thank you. xoxo

  • junkevil

    That comment is in direct reply to Andrews where he clearly states that you don’t want me there and implies that I am jealous for not being included. My retort was that it would have been a better insult if it were the only time the link had ever been shared. We’ve also moved past that post and I think he and I have most recently come to an agreement to argue until the end of time. Do try to keep up.

  • tOmy`

    “Kristen Stewart says that none of the drafts she saw for The Huntsman: Winter’s War were “greenlight-able”, is happy she avoided the movie.”

    Oh, the sweet irony.

  • tOmy`

    All I was doing is just clearing things up so we can avoid any further drama and move on (yet again).

    I also feel like that reminding this (not necessarily to you, but anyone reading it) is a good way to go about it.

    That’s all.

  • Sully

    Not enough “resting bitch face” in parentheticals I guess.

  • Variant

    Ehhhhh…. no. That was all wrong. The problem wasn’t that he was being too goofy, the problem was that he was being goofy at completely the wrong time. The concept was supposed to be that the suit is making him evil and selfish so he… air humps and uses his landlord’s daughter to get free cookies? And sports an emo cut? Yeah, that’s what I call dark, man. Spiderman can be goofy, but he’s not a horny punk, and being a horny punk isn’t exactly the best way to portray something bringing out the “dark” side in him.

  • Ogrot

    Yeah. Peter is an awkward dork. That while trying to be cool, would think that is how cool people behave. I agree on that front that Tobey Maguire was better than Garfield. I mean the guy doesn’t even like lasagne. And I suspect he loves the shit out of Mondays. And thinks Nermal’s adorable.

  • If Sam Raimi makes another weird out of control Spider Man he can have all my money. I love those movies mostly because they are campy and silly.

  • That’s why I think I like it so much. It mocks the whole idea of comic book movies. I kind of like it. It’s a lot of fun.

  • Palpatine

    And that movie had Bryce Dallas Howard in a blonde wig. So there’s that.

  • tOmy`

    Oh man, I remember that game. There were so many infuriating parts.

    Speeder was good tho. Or whatever was it called. Racer? Pod-Racer? Spinning?

  • Ogrot

    I think the problem with the ideological conflict within Civil War was it was a conflict without any real stakes other than Cap and five other misfits aint Avengers no more except they kinda are but super serial secret avengers on the down low. Neither side had to really give anything up except Iron Man’s grudge, I guess. I guess a couple UN bureaucrats were pissed off everyone didn’t sign or maybe they weren’t?

    The conflicts seem to be as the movie presents them personal freedom and independent initiative vs. cooperation and compromise and Loyalty to friends and family vs. obedience to law and order. Yet other than a little bit of dialogue to these ideas there isn’t much in the film itself that owes much exploration into any of these ideas. In fact Capn is slightly presented in a better light since his initiative keeps him on the trail despite for the wrong reasons while Iron Man just keeps playing Jailor to all his friends. It would’ve been better if the issue were murkier. Perhaps if Captain’s personal pursuit of Bucky was more destructive and destabilizing to the world and his relationships around him begging the question if Captain was losing perspective. Perhaps if Iron Man had to suffer from organizational blunders of UN operatives sending the Avengers out for things that are part of their own agenda instead of investigating something they feel is more important. The stakes needed to be there and they weren’t. And no this doesn’t mean millions need to die or a piece of space debris needs to hit the earth, but the plot needs to explore these ideas if it pretends to be about them.

    The conflict archetype reminded me of an extremely good episode of Battlestar Galactica where Kara Thrace crashes her ship into a planet. In prior episodes Admiral Adama had an understanding with the President of the Fleet that if she stayed out of military affairs he’d stay out of politics and would be able on his independent initiative keep the fleet safe. It had been a balance of power that served them well. But Kara Thrace was family to Adama’s and he spent every available military resource he had to search and map the planet trying to find her. Putting his air wing out of commission. Wasting already low fuel supplies and putting his pilots and the fleet at risk in terms of losses during the misadventure and the ever growing possibility of attack from their enemies as they stayed there trying to find her. The conflict between the grieving Admiral and the concerned President is met with unlikely alliances and a split between the major power brokers in the show. Both the President and Adama’s Executive Officer (and best friend who hates politicians) face off with Adama and his estranged son who is often on the President’s side of things. The stakes are clear as are the outcomes of the decision. Coldly abandon a beloved character, Kara Thrace, for survival or risk losing everything over a few peoples’ personal sentimentality. It is tautly emotional and tense and didn’t need a dumb fistfight or battle or death to even create it.

  • Ben A

    Been watching RLM since 2010, and this is the first time I’ve ever fundamentally disagreed with Mike. There is some inconsistency here with his tone and critique. This was a good movie through and through. Good action, good humor, an engaging and dramatic plot (that has nothing to do with a blue laser in the sky which is a common critique here at RLM) and while it may have some short comings, Civil War is taking an opportunity to bring in real world problems of power and accountability. The fact that Mike, Jay, and Rich are debating it on their show I think serves as a testament that the movie did in fact put questions in people’s minds. Having the Avengers go under oversight is completely understandable. I typically don’t like a lot of Marvel movies, there dumb and pandering and just of blah, but the Russo brothers I think have proved with Winter Soldier and with this one that the material can transcend into something entraining and through provoking. Is this movie a masterpiece. Of course not, but it should get an A for effort on the same level that Winter Soldier did. Not a C+. I think Mike needs to rewatch the movie and this time he needs to remember to take his brain pills. How do you like Jurassic World but not care to much for this?

  • Ben A

    Civil War was awesome. And it was really good. And it made my penis feel good.

  • Ben A

    Do comments get deleted here? I left a lengthy comment on why i disagreed with Mike’s critique on Civil and it looks as if it’s been removed…there was no ugliness or bad language so why was it removed??

  • OMNI

    I see it below.

  • Ben A

    oh, okay, thats weird, i don’t see it at all.

  • OMNI

    Check how you’re sorting your posts.

  • Ben A

    It’s actually completely gone on my end. I was editing it to fix some spelling errors and it said waiting for approval at RLM then just disappeared.

  • caye74

    They don’t like commenting

  • Ben A

    If they don’t like people commenting then why do they give people the ability to comment?

  • caye74

    It’s a recent development, used to be my happy place

  • Ben A

    Well I certainly hope that’s not true. This is always been a happy place for me too. A place of discussion and insight, not spite. Too be fair, I don’t actually think my comment got deleted. Something weird must’ve happened. But if it really did get deleted simply because the nature of it was disagreeing then ouch baby, really ouch.

  • caye74

    It seems some overzealous admins started banning people and forbade links and pictures, go figure.. no explanation given … lot of old guard left the place

  • Ogrot

    Yeah I see it too. That is prolly disqus being finicky. I’ve seen it do weird things when I try and edit posts sometimes.

  • Ben A

    So i found it. It got deleted as Spam

  • Ogrot

    okay nvm, it is now gone. Tried replying to it and it said you can’t reply to inactive posts. I refreshed and it was gone. Disqus is weird. It generally auto-updates new content and changes deleted material to post deleted instead of pruned from the page outright. At least from what I’ve seen.

    Perhaps it was put on mod approval and then approved and then the approved was cancelled pulling it back out of view???

  • Ben A

    Well i was getting pretty nit picky with my spell check edits. So I can how that would mess it up. Any-who thx!

  • Ogrot

    see if it is still on your comment tree go to profile -> comments

    if it is still on mod review it should be in your history with pending listed next to it.

  • Ben A

    found it, awesome, thx again.

  • Ogrot

    That is weird. It looked like a pretty standard post. It didn’t even have any links.

    Usually spam filters parse for hyperlinks, keyword stuffing patterns, blacklisted emails, etc.

  • Palpatine

    Did you put a link in your comment?

  • Ben A

    I just reposted it and it got marked as spam again. So weird.

  • Ben A

    no, maybe its just the way I wrote it. It just comes off spammy

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    Civil War really needed this line from Batman v. Superman to put it over the top:

    “What’s your name, Wallace!? What do they call ya, Wally!?”

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    “Bucky, what has you had?”

    – Not one of the black actors

  • Embodied

    If you have similar problems to find that mysterious “pvp” in Dark Souls 3 everyone is talking about try out the Red Eye Orb. Instead of one pvp every 130h as a Blade of the Darkmoon I had today 4 pvp in 30min alone with the help of the orb.

  • disqus_fnwCMQDX7u

    I thought they reused the Alien 3 sets in this movie… not sure if that’s the case or not, but the Russos said Alien 3 was an influence on Civil War at least.

  • Well, there are no rules exactly. Why not just have fun?

  • Remember: Smoking helps with the sweet tooth. Loose weight now. 1-800 SMOKE

    #Clutter

  • Palpatine

    *Snoke

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    She hasn’t died to a tragic bullet hole to the head yet?

  • fred

    The only thing I read from Vanity Fair was Christopher Hitchens “Why Women Aren’t Funny”

  • Mike Magnum

    Its still better than the Book. At least Tony Stark in the movie had a motivation. In the Book hes was an Asshole for no real reason. And consider how awful the book was. This could have been far far far worse. Frankly im surprise how decent it was.

  • OMNI

    Did it have a link in it?

  • NicCagesHair

    I assume you wanted it back so you could pay again!!!!

  • NicCagesHair

    My framerate is so bad the only place I can go online to PvP is after Pontiff. I do get summoned and can invade pretty regularly from there.

  • tOmy`

    “Where’s Wallace, tho?”

    HUH?! WHERE’S WALLACE?!

  • tOmy`

    VF is quite great when it comes to Vanity, but not much when it comes to anything else.

  • john

    is that the guy from Green Room?

  • junkevil

    You know, You’d like to imagine that my post calling an apple an apple is designed to incite drama or be a troll post and not an actual opinion… And you just hate all the drama, right? Well, If that were true why do you continue to respond? Why not simply ignore and move on? You’re now perpetuating the very drama that you claim to want none of and wish to move past. Why? No one forced you to continue the conversation and you’re not actually adding anything of substance to it with this post. Wouldn’t you have been happier knowing the conversation had simply died?

    I understand that my post offended you, but that’s how it is with uncensored free speech. People say things that you don’t like sometimes. It’s not drama
    to have a different opinion or to see things in a different perspective, and it doesn’t make someone a troll either. At any rate, I find it hard to believe that there aren’t any rules when one small voice of dissent causes this much backlash. The Hivemind was just unprepared for it, I guess.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    I agree he would have beaten Cap on a one-on-one fight. Actually, I’d say he would also have beaten most of Cap’s allies single-handed too (assuming this version has Spider-Sense, Ant-Man would never have cold-cocked him, right?), but that the film makers maybe thought that in an introduction that would be too much like fluffing one character at the expense of others.

    While I’m at it: he wouldn’t have left the fight the way he did. He’d have kept going, especially the younger Spidey. But they needed to get him out of the movie, I guess.

  • Embodied

    yeah that’s right. But I don’t want to join these fight club. I want fooling around.

  • Ok. There is a lot of things I have no idea of what you mean. I haven’t read anything you posted except the first one. I thought you were a troll cus you pushed all buttons and started accusing us hive minds. So I posted fart breath and what not but took it away when I understood you were not kidding and this thing was bothering you.

    I only asked the question because yes why not just enjoy it now when we don’t spam. And there are no rules on how to behave. I don’t want drama. Certainly not what you just posted. This is not what I want here. Sure I get your criticism but were not here anymore.

    I don’t feel offended but I just don’t understand if you bring up this topic why all accusations and harsh tone? If it’s anger why not just say it? Why be cruel?

    -This- is people typing things on keyboards not having anyway of resolving things. It’s not like in real life when we understand intent. People have gotten angry and stopped posting in the past and that is no fun. This is drama. Hope you understand what I mean. It’s not in my mind a conversation. It just to make people angry.

    And I think we can have rules on RLM and make this place fun for all that wishes. I think tapeworld is the perfect place to take our shitposts.

    Anyway have a good day. And I hope we can have fun here.

  • Malevolence

    Has that bald guy played in any other skits? Looks familiar

  • Rumblepuss

    Is no one going to make the Rhodey M.A.N.T.I.S. joke?! I’m onto you, Russo Brothers! I know who you are, and I saw what you did.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    It’s good they finally killed off Black Widow, now all those Tumblrinas can stop bitching about her solo film that no penis wants to see.

  • Rumblepuss

    Isn’t it also nice to see a genuine and emotionally intimate male friendship in a huge blockbuster film? Acknowledging that men can have meaningful close relationships with one another is humanizing and undermines the homophobia which normally leads to the absence of genuine male friendships in popular culture. They talk about girls because they were like 18 the last time life was normal for the two of them, and that’s what hetero teenage dudes talk to one another about. And in this case, Bucky is literally the only person who really understands Cap and where he’s coming from. To frame their intimacy in a sexual relationship would yet again clumsily confuse the concept of romantic love with platonic love: they don’t have to be fucking in order to care deeply for one another. Dudes are just as capable of having meaningful friendships as ladies are!!

    Men’s rights!!!!!

    Wait, wat??

  • Rumblepuss

    This movie made me realize that the reason that I’m always irritated by Spider-Man (and especially Peter himself) is that he’s always portrayed as an adult (25-35ish?) who has the problems and emotional development of a teenager. He’s all wrapped up in his own shit, he feels persecuted, he won’t talk to anyone about what’s going on with him, he’s a show-off, he has no idea how to communicate with women … if that guy is 30 years old, he is a fucking asshole. However, if that guy is 16, he’s much more sympathetic an his motives make sense! I still think that adult male Spider-Man fans are mopey man-children (I’m looking at you, Rich Evans), but at least now I feel like I get the appeal of the character.

  • junkevil

    See, that’s the worst part, you think I’m trying to be malicious and cruel. That’s never been my intention, and as I’ve before stated, I thought the post was pretty funny. Why would I make such a joke though?

    So, A number of people got banned and there was no explanation why. I get that, and I don’t agree with it and I’ve never said that they deserved it. I think banning someone without a reason is pretty shitty actually. There’s some bitterness on your side over this, and I get that too. What I don’t get is why posts over there would be derogatory of users posting things on topic here. What did the users here do to you? They didn’t ban you, and your group actually all met by being normal users over here at one point. So, why are nerds posting on a topic a target for bitterness over there? Shouldn’t the shadow mods be a target for that? They were the ones who actually wronged you. What did nerds ever do to you? Maybe they said you were the worst thing to happen to star wars, but that’s another opinion you’ll have to accept if you truly value free speech. Ever since said exodus users from Tapeworld have come here and shared information on how to find it in absence of being able to link it. It’s been mentioned in multiple posts. It’s being called the real RLM comment section.

    I understand that a number of you are now pissed at me, and that’s fine. I just wish you’d try and understand what I was getting at instead of acting like I’m out to hurt peoples feelings.

  • She’s dead? Alright that’s good news.

  • The immediate tone you have is cruel when you start writing. Accusational like nowplus “and which buttplugs to insert while you listen” . Alright look I’m not reading the rest of this. BUZZOFF!

  • tOmy`

    It helps with a lot of things, the cool factor being the main one.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    Nah, I’m just being a prick.

  • Rumblepuss

    The villain in Thor 2 is better if you imagine him to be some terrifying alternate universe version of the Doctor. War Doctor, indeed!

  • Hey! I was buying a ticket to go see it. Ah, never mind. Maybe she’ll die in Ghost in the Shell.

  • junkevil

    Humor is subjective, but thanks for the feedback.

  • Ok. I think I understand now. Have a good day.

  • Ogrot

    Well Spider-Man believably portrayed as a teenager is essentially the origin of the character.

    From the creator’s mouth:

    “Then I figured, to make him different — I’d make him a teenager. And to make him even more different, I’d give him a lot of personal problems. I thought, ‘Oh man, this is going to be a hit!’

    “My publisher said, ‘Stan, that is the worst idea. First of all, people don’t like spiders. You can’t call the hero Spider-Man. And you can’t make him a teenager — teenagers can only be sidekicks. And you want him to have personal problems? Stan, don’t you know what a superhero is?’ He did everything but kick me out of the office!”

  • So. Anyone planning on watching ST: Beyond?

  • Nordquist

    Yeah I’m going to end up seeing it. I was never a Trek fan so the fact these movies are *ruining Star Trek* does not bother me.

  • OMNI

    Yes

  • Cream-A-Thon

    No Old Spook : Not Star Track

  • Archfiend_Baramos

    No, the problem isn’t that I think that. I don’t. The problem is the rest of the internet thinks that.

  • Sortilege

    it’s Mike’s brother Melvin.

  • Imaf

    Have you noticed that the posts for videos are down to the hundreds? (They were up in the thousands recently.)

  • Guus van Voorst

    Rich, I love you man, but you really got to stop being such a nitpicker about these movies…

  • Guus van Voorst

    I think all Cap. America movies were good in general…

  • OMNI

    That’s because RLM “took” the ability to post links and pissed some people off.

  • OMNI

    I’ll watch it for Bones and Kirk, I’m not a fan of the Zack Q Spock.

  • Joe Syxpac

    It’s impossible for us to share our unique opinions without the ability to link to someone else.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    I’ve been gone for a while, and I’d been noticing that the comments section was different. Is that the only reason?

  • Joe Syxpac

    I know they used rod puppets instead of cgi.

  • Michael Collins

    This section had a core of 7 or 8 people just posting in a constant circle jerk…

    Maybe now it will be more natural, and on point.

  • tOmy`

    It is quite impossible to reference articles and discuss a lot of pop culture without links. Sure, I can reenact the whole trailer we are discussing for you, but then again, I ain’t no Oscar material.

  • tOmy`

    Yea, the last posts are pretty much embodiment of being on point.

    – Question about lack of comments
    – Not referencing the movie
    – Troll post
    – 18th bold man question
    – Troll post
    – Dark Souls post
    – People arguing about the lack of comments

    It sure is a different kinda beast these days.

  • Nordquist

    Your wasting your time on deaf ears, let them believe what they want to believe and get back in the circle of jerking.

  • tOmy`

    Meh, I don’t mind, at least some discussion I can join here as I still haven’t seen the vid / movie.

  • Nordquist

    Yeah I have not been to movies since Star Wars. Need to make more friends or start being a loner and going to the movies by myself.

  • tOmy`

    It is kinda odd how my hype for this movie totally tanked like a week before the premier.

    I was looking forward to it for like 2 months and then I just forgot about it.

  • Nordquist

    I tried keeping up with all the Marvel movies but they make them too quick. I had seen every single one in theaters up until Ante man which I still have not seen. Maybe the loss of Hype is due to the fact we knew this movie was going to be a thing almost two years ago. It’s hard to stay hyped that long.

  • Sully

    You’re just upset you’re not kneeling in the middle.

  • Sully

    I’ll probably see it once it’s released on video on disc for download.

  • fred

    I can’t wait for the video game moopie starring robot lady and Prometheus — “big things have small beginnings.”

  • tOmy`

    Just like big bang.

  • fred

    Let’s not forget the shoe ads with naked women!!

  • fred

    Big Bang Theory — the show that gave me cancer.

  • Rumblepuss

    Right, which is why it’s always been baffling to me that Hollywood insists on portraying him using adult actors, _especially_ since they can’t resist using his origin story every time. The character just isn’t likable as a grown man who acts like a child, especially to a female audience. We’ve all known the adolescent in a man’s body, and some of us have been unfortunate enough to date him: douchebags can’t be superheros.

    Also, how could the publisher fail to recognize the potential of a sticky-footed web-shooting acrobat flipping around Manhattan?? Was the first-draft version wearing a hairy brown eight-legged fursuit or something?

    Do you think there are furries out there who are into spiders??

  • I’m more of a fan of the ship than the characters. The Enterprise has cool montages and battles. If they make a full ship battle movie I’m game.

  • It’s not ruining it in my opinion there is just no room for anyother way of making it right at this period I guess. I think they could get a Star Trek show going in the future that is more of what it’s suppose to be. I think there is room for explorer/encounter type scifi in the future but now it’s just dirt bikes and dumb action that prevails.

  • CM Chunk

    Rich at least seemed to enjoy the film. I think Mike has given up on super hero films entirely. I think he’d rather watch Attack of the Clones over another super hero film.

  • Victims of Cosby. They’ll wake up eventually.

  • Nordquist

    The show that gave cancer, cancer.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Bad joke from radio today: The new Star Trek movie will continue its reimagining of the franchise. Now, Leonard Nimoy will play bones…

  • Domo

    Now killed with Polio!

  • Bubs

    Gang Bang Theory — the show that gave me a hardon.

  • Variant

    I won’t say that movie in general wasn’t “fun”. But it was bloated, and in unison with ruining the idea that the suit corrupted Peter Parker, they also did Eddie Brock/Venom completely wrong. I wasn’t a huge comic book reader as a kid (wanted to be, but I soon found out comic books were expensive as hell and I’d rather get a video game), but amongst the few I did read were the first few issues of “Venom” that tells his origin and narrates from his schizophrenic point of perspective. There was a part where he wanted to murder the CO of a corporation but he accidentally killed an old cleaning lady who was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. There was a sort of gleeful dark comedy that bordered on grim, and I guess I was just hoping to see some sort of cinematic mirror to that with the whole suit thing – whether or not Venom was going to be in it. But it wasn’t – and he was – and it was bad. I just always really liked the idea of a symbiotic suit that merged with the mind of the host, and caused a sort of split personality disorder. They didn’t do anything with that though.

  • Nordquist

    I’m not sure if their is a porno version of that show but this needs to be the name if their is.

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    Was my post the troll post!? HOW DARE YOU!!!

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    We jerk each other off in a moon-shaped pool.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Movies just make him want to die.

  • NicCagesHair

    It was the role he was born to play.

  • NicCagesHair

    Speaking of moon shaped pools, where’s @disqus_qSI8fsAl8h:disqus’s 450000 word post about that album?

  • NicCagesHair

    I think this link banning was just a way for RLM to save bandwidth or gigawatts or something.

  • Jonah Falcon

    The problem is that the Superhero Registration Act in the comics was about secret identities. The gov’t wants them all to out their secret identities. Peter does so, and it leads to One More Day. That alone makes the SRA the dumbest shit in the universe.

  • Jonah Falcon

    Cat Bang Theory — because sometimes you gotta fuck your cat.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    RLM should do a superhero movie to see how hard it is to build a universe and entertain within it. Something maybe about cops from the future of space. Then and only then may RLM critique super hero movies and count ‘shrugging’ as serious criticism. Oh they did that already? Shrug.

  • ikdks

    I don’t want to get too Rupert Pubkin, but I feel like one of my posts clued Mike into the tmi thing.

    Then again I also feel that Ethel from I Love Lucy wants to have sex with me.

  • Ninja Benja

    I love that part when steve rogers was carrying agent carters casket and he accidentally dropped it, cuz he’s such a clutz, and then she fell onto the floor with the frozen look of death on her face, ho man. classic marvel.

  • Malevolence

    Like the 6th time Rich died on this show… starting to think it’s an yearly tradition

  • Cream-A-Thon

    Rich like Deadpool/Wolverine except mumblier, yet he heals fast and outlasts most of his opponents with his special regeneration power. He had a six-issue series under the name Amazin’ Milwaukee Man but was cancelled due to low sperm count.

  • Embodied

    I think it’s a law thing. Maybe something changed in the western Empire. Like if you allow third party links in your comment zone you have to carry a sign with “I’m watching The Room on a daily base and I like it” written on it or something.

  • Embodied

    yeah but you could easily join the conversations. Now it’s like the engine is broken.

  • Embodied

    Finally someone speaks that out. Enough of this “bcs it tastes great” bullshit. It taste like licking the street on a midsummer day.

  • Embodied

    I was desperate…

  • Thanatos2k

    And then he tries to get into the pants of her granddaughter! How fucking creepy is that.

    Oh wait, that actually did happen!

  • Thanatos2k

    It’s the old “What was Palpatine going to do, take out a lightsaber and attack them? Then why didn’t he take out a lightsaber before?” problem

    If they didn’t sign, what was the UN going to do? Arrest them? Then why hadn’t anyone arrested them before for their similarly lawless actions?

  • kalke

    Hey that fight scene was exciting!

  • Ninja Benja

    Oh yeah that was creepy, especially the scene that followed the one where they hooked up, Cap wakes up and finds that the granddaughter has taken a $20 bill from his wallet and then WHAMO! clonks her with the shield. I guess it’s Marvels way of making it edgier and dark.

  • tOmy`

    Hiding in the place we shall not mention. Actually, I would, but I can’t find the link. Gimme a sec (he said, as if it means anything in the world of internet comments).

    To furthermore break the time-continuum, after 5 minutes of trying to locate that post I realized I cannot link it.

    Wellp, off to the normal comment then. Look above!

  • tOmy`

    Be careful what you wish for, folks:

    Radiohead – A Moon Shaped Pool

    ’twas the night before Monday. My legally bought album just finished downloading, but I didn’t unzip it yet, as I was listening to the BBC Radio 6’s live event. For the first time ever, we had a chance to hear 10 new songs from the first album by Radiohead in 6 years. Almost stereotypically talking DJ was spinning Idioteque before putting the album’s closing track on the air. He calls it “the song that is old enough to legally drink now.”

    And then, when the words “I am not living, I am just killing time” burst through the radiowaves, you could almost hear the collective explosion of hundreds, if not thousands of fans tuned in – this is it, the True Love Waits finally happened and we were there, for its first time on air. The legend is over, the spell is broken, we caught our unicorn.

    And that got me thinking: If you are reading this and you are not properly familiar with Radiohead, you have no clue what the hell am I even babbling about. And neither will you understand why “personal” or “break-up” album is so important to fans, nor will you get how harrowing the words “Don’t leave” make us feel. How come people are so happy about Identikit being on the album, who the hell is Nigel and why is his father’s death connected to the album? You see, this is a Radiohead album that almost feels like being made for fans. And that is the reason why I will not try to review it as a fan for fans, but as a guy reviewing an album for casual listeners. That is why my absolute perfect 10/10 won’t happen in this case.

    A Moon Shaped Pool opens with an intense single and right off the gate you are pretty much introduced to all brand new concepts of this album: While being mellow, chill-out or beautiful on the surface, the underlying tension, darkness and experimental harmonies make for an intense, often almost scary ride. The album never quite lets you relax, due to its dark nature. You can also hear London Contemporary Orchestra for the first time on the album – Jonny Greenwood utilized his connections and indisputable composing skills to inflict as much damage to the beauty as humanly possible for a mellow album like this. It is Jonny as we know him – that guy who came up with the brutal guitar assault on Creep because it sounded too nice to him – doing what he does best. Radiohead managed to transform classical instruments to the borderline electronic stuff. The borderline between analog and digital was always Radiohead’s MO, but never before were even the smallest bleeps and bloops done by over-effecting string sections, or transforming choral singing into a sound close to synths.

    But A Moon Shaped Pool is also partly about Thom’s break up and it shows. The second song Daydreaming is the first glimpse into the last new aspect of this album: Radiohead are going personal. We always had a window into their deranged souls and brains, but we never quite peeked through to their heart. And here, as well as on many other songs, Thom shows his fragile feelings to the world. Maybe nowhere else it is as obvious as on finally released True Love Waits. We can only guess if the words “Don’t leave” are this time meant for someone particular, but I think our guess is the correct one; just the way Thom sings this song, you can capture a glimpse of hurt, glimpse of bargaining, glimpse of his true feelings.

    In all fairness, the album plays amazingly great, despite its complex nature. It is definitely meant to be listen to very carefully, with headphones on, so you can catch all the little tweaks and tricks. Even classical scene picked up on the hype, already exploring the brand new harmonies, effects and composition – which is the first time for a band like Radiohead. But the album will wear you down and not being a fan can ultimately make you confused what is the half of the fuzz even about. Worlds like “underwhelming” or “boring song” can come into play and they are just as always absolutely justified. But nerds and Radiohead fans can geek-out to one of the most important bands ever returning in a spectacular form and yet again proving that everyone is still years behind them.

    8.9/10

    As a fan: 10/10

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    Darwyn Cooke has passed away.

    Terrible shame. A very, very, very talented man.

  • OMNI

    (Pre) Viously (Rec) Orded should review DOOM 2016. The game is totally bad-ass…oh wait….

  • Toffoli_73

    Like Mike, I found myself bored through a good portion of the first half. It took a long time to get all the pieces in place. But man, the last 45 minutes were pure schlocky greatness. I honestly had a blast watching that airport fight. Shit Marvel, why do you keep giving me just enough to enjoy to bring me back to your stupid movies?

  • Double Agent Mitchell

    I love that you’re a fanboy.

    And there’s no sarcasm in that statement, if you thought there was.

    I gave it a spin yesterday and it’s a nice record. One thing I’ll say about Radiohead is that – even though there are some records I like more than others – I always come back to all of them at some point.

  • Ogrot

    That and it presented an ideological conflict and then did nothing to explore it. Instead we just have Cap chasing Bucky because he just can’t quit him and Iron Man chases Cap because the UN Oversight committee shrugged its shoulders and said it ain’t like you got anything better to do…

    And ultimately this break of the Avengers has no consequences at the end. Cap left a love note for Iron Man that his posse will show for a booty call anytime. Thus rendering the break up and the entire conflict of the movie pointless and inconsequential. Should’ve been Captain America: This movie is pointless but it has a fun Spiderman cameo.

  • Ogrot

    It was important to shoe horn in a love interest so that people didn’t think Cap was only chasing Bucky, because he wanted to find out if he could/would penetrate his shield.

  • tOmy`

    Fanboyism is a fun thing. As I mentioned above, thanks to my love for this band, I can fully and truly appreciate even the simplest lyrical moments of this album. “Just… don’t leave”, “broken hearts, make it rain” or for example “you gotta be kidding me”.

    And that’s kinda odd, because these are just small moments, simple lyrics. Yet you can see how many Radiohead fans are already using these words as some sort of a tagline for a banner. Like a slogan.

    I know Radiohead fanbase can be unfortunately very annoying and pretentious, but I do have a soft spot for people who’s favorite t-shirts are referencing a song that hasn’t been released for 20+ years.

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Otherwise known as a case of the not-gays.

  • fred

    They will once Rich gets a hold of it.

  • TheVerySpecialK

    Marvel has hands in ass-wallets everywhere.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Ain’t cha never had a conversation face to face with nobody afore?

    Oh, wait. I forgot who I was talking to.

    Sorry.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Well… I wouldn’t call it “born” per se.

  • Joe Syxpac

    That’s why I keep my wallet in my front pocket. If someone is gonna take my money I should at least get something out of it.

  • Embodied

    Of course they will. Their whole tirade about “third person over the shoulder view” from Quantum Break review was already a build up to Doom. (because first person…)

  • tOmy`

    Well, I am gonna ignore that insult, or what I presume was an insult, because I have no idea how to interpret it or where it came from, and focus on the key thing here:

    Yes, I have, but how many times have you said things like “Oh, man, shame you didn’t see it.” “Oh, well I will send it to you later on.” You know, similar conversation-enders. That is one of the many reasons people keep staring at their goddamn cellphones in pubs.

    But, even more importantly, we ain’t talk here about face-to-face. Sure, I might got carried away with that “impossible” word, but sure as shit it is convenient. Share options and links are slowly becoming the key feature of internet. Convenient to spread the information in a compact and fast manner. You don’t have to look that far: Facebook’s content is now more shares and links than original posts.

    This all boils down to convenience and limiting convenience for no reason is an odd and counterproductive thing.

    Oh, now I got the insult! It’s because my face is words now, right? Hehe, that’s actually quite clever.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Would you call yourself a funboy, then?

  • bleurgh

    It’s an okay record, my favourite songs are probably The Numbers because it sounds like they were trying to write a Tim Buckley song and Glass Eyes because he actually pulled off creating lyrics that are impressionistic without just writing lyrics that were weird for the sake of being weird. The only song I’d probably listen to again would be Glass Eyes. The rest of the record will be deleted from my itunes catalogue in a week or two once the novelty has worn off. 3/10

  • bleurgh

    Watching this OJ show, it’s pretty much a bunch of actors all at the absolute nadir of their careers giving the performances of their lives, because they are all so desperate for work and this might be the last chance they get to even be in anything. Pretty compelling shit.

  • Amorphous Bob

    An anagram of Leonard Nimoy is “inane or moldy”.

  • Jerome Gorden

    Good comment. Yes, this movie wasn’t Shakespeare (it’s not supposed to be) but it was fun enough to justify the ticket price. After the crapfest that was BvS this movie should have gotten more praise. And why did they shut down any comparison to BvS?

  • Jerome Gorden

    I looks like the biggest complaint about this movie is that Stark and Captain America didn’t talk to each other, and that this simple act could have avoided the entire conflict. This criticism was very true for BvS, but not for this movie. Stark’s unwillingness to “talk” to Captain America (hear him out) made sense considering all that had transpired prior to their meeting at the airport. So much had happened to put them on a collision course with each other that talking was no longer an option. Basically, by that point, Captain America had done so much wrong – from Stark’s point of view – that no explanation was justified. Unlike BvS, the motivations in this movie were setup well.

  • BunnyHooHoo

    Why is Mike not drinking beer? I can’t hardly concentrate on the review it’s so distracting.

  • kylemz

    i loved Ok Computer when I was 17 and was really into them until I lost interest with Hail to the Thief, though they had really lost the magic with Kid A/Amnesiac. I hate drum machines on rock albums, and Yorke just became a pretentious whiner. I got into them late, having somehow missed ‘Creep’ (though I think i would have been indifferent to it at the time, even though i was in junior high). I never heard anything from The Bends until after Computer, as I got really into classic rock/hard rock at that time, and was biased against much of “alternative rock” and tired of its praise. But those two albums were their peak and showed me the better aspects of modern rock i’d been missing. I just found this and thought it was funny:

    https://youtu.be/DfkPmbg1ymM

  • fred

    The Pacific Episode 4 — that was one of the worst strangles I have ever seen; use your THUMBS dammit.

  • fred

    He was saving it for the next Wheel of the Worst.

  • I’m completely with Jay on this one. And I believe this is an example of what I said another time about Mike. He just seems bored and tired with movies, and I really think he needs a break. It’s gotten to the point where he is the type of audience that he often criticizes: If there isn’t something flashy on the screen at every second, he gets bored. And movies that are more esoteric in nature are the subject of ridicule to him. He’s also cynical to the point of being uninteresting. His usual insightfulness has been gone recently, replaced by a defensive mocking of people who don’t see things his way. I sincerely hope he will take a break and will come back to reviewing because I think he used to be one of the greatest critics ever, but I haven’t seen a spark of his usual brilliance, nor even of any kind of enjoyment in his reviews in a while. Even Rich, who I severely disagree with in this review, at least has some insightful things to say, while Mike just seems to grumble without much purpose. I don’t believe this is permanent; I just think it’s temporary burnout which could come with a short break from it all, and I sincerely hope he’ll consider it.

  • We need to send him a keg of beer. That’ll get him going.

  • NicCagesHair

    I hope Mike is excited for The Conjuring 2 because it looks schlock-tastic!!!!!!

  • NicCagesHair

    There was probably a coup somewhere and we are paying the price of ignorance.

  • Captain Turbo

    I guess the regular spammers and their inane comments have been driven away from RLM. Yay!

  • Malevolence

    Its been 10 days, how much does it cost to repair cardboard sets. Where’s all that Space Cop money going?

  • Malevolence

    Its been 10 days, how much and how long does it cost to repair a cardboard wall. Where’s all that Space Cop money going?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    Inspired by true events. One of Mike’s weaknesses.

    It’s based on the Warren’s most documented/famous case. So, I guess it means everything, or close to it, that happens in the movie, happened in real life too.

  • Bubs

    Thanks for filling the void with THIS incredibly high-quality, entertaining, and thought-provoking comment.

    #Hypocrisy

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    Well, I don’t know about that. A lot of what you describe is some of what caused me to sort of drift away from RLM a while back. Maybe almost two years now? So maybe it won’t change.

    That said, I actually mostly agree with Mike about this movie.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    The movie is already fading in my memory, but as I recall, Stark did try to mend things with Cap – gave him a present and whatnot. Cap was the one shitting on everyone who didn’t agree with him.

    By the way, Cap’s sense of moral certitude is more understandable in the comics, where he has the history to back it up. In the cinematic universe, he’s barely more important than Black Widow. If that.

  • Domo

    Enough exposition! Lets get to the next RLM video already!

  • OMNI

    Guess not. loll. I kid, I Kid…

  • fred

    Hey look a tumbleweed

  • *I guess the loyal visitors and their consistent stream of comments have been driven away from RLM. Yay?

  • junkevil

    THEY’RE ALL GOING TO THUMBS DOWN YOUR COMMENT, WATCH OUT!!!

  • It was the link ban and that we have no rules of what not to post. I think it still worked out for the best.

  • Sillynilly, have some love. *hug*

  • Domo

    No one has downvoted his comment in the 13 hours it’s been up. I’m not sure why you’re so angry.

  • I’m sure he is going to watch it. He’s a sucker for those.

  • Tapeworm

    😉

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Why you so jelly bro?

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    You’re just angry that the disqus name ‘sloppy_seconds’ wasn’t already taken…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    I saw you hatin’ on us a few days ago… Now you’re JKing…. Right, right…

  • I’m watching Gorilla Interrupted on repeat again. I’ts a sign that this toad needs some new content. That or re release The Animated Plinkett Series. Or both but give us something.

  • Palpatine

    RLM’s best film to date.

  • Nordquist

    Stop it you spammer toad this webzone is for off brand comments about how people don’t post here only!

  • fred

    I would say it’s “United States of No!!!” but apparently it’s lost in the forgotten dung heap of Blip-tv. Hopefully it will be re-uploaded or someone backed it up.

  • fred

    Band of Brothers is better than The Pacific.

  • Nordquist

    But more Jap’s died in The Pacific.

    Pearl Harbor/10

  • dollar store cashier wife

    The RLM comment zone dosnt have off topic you dumb fat, skinny fucks.

    Its pure instince. Look crocodile brain, like lion brain.

    Dont comment on disqus. Uninstall it you boring twats. Dont dont about stuff you dont like.

    Do you know lessons of life? talk about stuff you do like. Twats.

  • I’d have expected Boss Nass to say that.

  • Nordquist

    He is rubbing off on me.

  • fred

    Jay is definitely the more balanced critic. Mike has his moments but sometimes he goes off the deep end when movies (Jurassic World) fill some lustful void for schlocky goo in his brain. I don’t think it’s too serious — although he was rather judgmental with Jay for liking Green Room because it’s “miserable”. Does Mike want all movies to be one thing? I haven’t seen it yet but Green Room looks like the most interesting film they’ve reviewed in a while and Jay sold it to me with his perspective.

    Maybe Mike is exhausted by the absurd expectations weighing down on the next Plinkett review. We’ll see — that looming review will be the litmus test. (he’s still good in BOTW though)

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Are they sending BatmanNews refuse over here now?

  • fred

    Oh look, it’s my comment from two days ago. Kill me.

  • We just need love. Good old group hug and enema can do miracles you know.

  • Nordquist

    Little did you know the nightmare of your own life had just begun!

  • A classic. Up there with the rest of them, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Citizen Kane and Suburban Commando. Good stuff.

  • RockyDmoney

    It was that they were going to lock up Wanda. Stark labeled her a “weapon of mass destruction”. That’s what set Cap off

  • Malevolence

    Sigh….. Rogue One looks good….. why did it have to follow such a terrible Star Wars film?

  • fred

    You’re falling into their trap. You must judge these on an individual basis. If you end up liking Rogue One you like Rogue One and that’s that.

  • fred

    The Pacific has more schmultzy characters and their’s a whole episode dedicated to some guy getting a girlfriend…and breaking up with her. Both shows have gloriously insane battles but Band of Brothers has more structure and less schlock.

  • TheVerySpecialK

    My problem with Rouge One is that I think it is telling a story that never needed to be told. The whole Death Star plans thing was just an efficient and effective plot device in A New Hope to get things rolling story-wise, which worked perfectly. It didn’t matter how the Rebels had got the plans, just like it didn’t matter how they got the plans of Death Star II in Jedi: the point was they had them, and then they moved on with the film. Bothans died, shit happened, but hey, now it’s time for an epic space battle. That works. That’s story telling.

    What doesn’t work is trying to go back retroactively to explain things that before were left up to our imagination (and rightfully so). One of the key components of a successful story is an element of mystery or complexity: characters mention things that are never fully explained, allowing the audience to experience a sense of true unfamiliarity and wonderment that immerses them in the story. When authors or directors feel the need to explain every last detail of their imagined world, the stories they tell loose their magic, their charm. The great masters like Tolkien are famous for the way they left things deliberately vague or unexplained, and it speaks volumes about the technique when you realize just how much it enhances the overall experience for the reader.

    Take a character like Boba Fett, for example. What made him and the other bounty hunters of Empire so interesting? They had hardly any screen time and were never given any expository dialogue to establish their back stories. And yet, all these years later, Boba Fett is one of the most revered characters of the entire Star Wars universe. What made Boba Fett such a great character was that he was basically an anti-character: a character so mysterious and unexplained that the audience can’t help but wonder what his story is. Unable to derive that information from the film, the audience is forced to use their imagination, thereby forming a connection with the film that is stronger than any connection that some scrap of backstory or exposition could manage to effect.

    So yeah, long story short I hate retroactive money-grabs like Rouge One that tear to shreads any semblance of profound and artful mystery for the sole reason that there is money to be made. Tell new stories, damn it! Create new mysteries to captivate a new generation! But spare the mysteries of old, the characters best left unexplained, the places best left unvisited and the stories best left untold, for those are what make art truly great.

  • Bubs

    I’m hoping Rogue One will open the doorway to more stories in the Star Wars universe that AREN’T about a bunch of magical assholes with glowing swords. What’s it like being a moisture farmer or a gun smuggler for the Huts? I don’t know, but I wouldn’t mind finding out. And I ain’t about to read one of those fucking comic books that’s for sure.

  • TheVerySpecialK

    Yeah, that would be cool. However, I think they should be creating new material rather than sticking to the coloring book that Lucas sold them. One of the reasons the prequels were so underwhelming was because everyone who saw A New Hope knew exactly how things were going to end up. Spoilers! Anakin is Darth Vader! And now the “new” films are doing it again. Spoilers! The Rebels get the plans! Seriously, what a fucking cop-out.

  • Malevolence

    Will there be Bothans? Or will the Director and Writers forget what Mon Mothma said

  • Malevolence

    I would, if only Episode 7 didn’t get a sequential place in the series. Nothing new or original was set up. Say what you will about George but he atleast expanded the Universe…. JJ Abrams does what he always does with a name brand, he pays homage rather than telling an original, interesting story

  • Nero12

    To be honest, that episode was easily the best in the series
    The Pacific has 0 structure, whereas Band of Brothers was based on a well written book.

  • RLMkeepitup

    He took a similar harsh stance with Gillian for loving that romantic comedy, What’s your number? Guess everyone has their own tastes in schlock. Jays into the weird horror. Best of the Worst has something for everyone. But I think the emptiness of the superhero genre has left him with little to formally critique, and with so much of the same I’d be lustful for some good schlock.. at least it’s something. These moopies clearly aren’t interesting to him.

  • fred

    lol — moisture farmer

  • Joe Syxpac

    More of a friendly gibe than an insult.

    On the plus side all the lack of activity here makes it easy to keep up with what’s going on.

  • Jonah Falcon

    Apocalypse has a 54 RT score so far.

  • Sortilege

    The Pacific just plain sucks.

  • OMNI

    Haters gonna hate

  • OMNI

    correction, keep him going…

  • AKA Mr. Wint

    Right…

  • fred

    Ok let’s go watch it.

  • Domo

    *sad xylophone music plays.

  • Malevolence

    Anyone playing Star Wars: Commander?

  • OMNI

    I’m trying to, but it wont work on my computer at the shop

  • Jerome Gorden

    What I really was expecting from RLM was a good comparison review between BvS and Civil War. Both movies tried to do exactly the same thing, but Civil War did it so much better. Civil War literally tripled the score of BvS on Rotten Tomatoes. Instead, what we got was an attack piece on Civil War which basically rehashed a lot of the criticism of BvS. That doesn’t make any sense.

  • Japs………………. g*dd*mn japs.

    #9/11

  • junkevil

    Hey, look, it’s the us vs them mentality that I’ve been told repeatedly doesn’t exist. You can draw lines in the sand all you you like, but I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere.

  • fred

    Yeah. I still enjoyed the review though. Mike shows wear and tear but that’s how he’s always been. They review these marvel moops for the ad revenue more than anything — but they can still keep the reviews fresh. Rich / Mike / and Jay had varied enough opinions for me. They would be much happier if they review shows I guess. (but happiness isn’t fun)

  • fred

    Your girlfriends at the shop

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    Oh man, I did not remember that at all.

    But still, I kinda feel like Captain A is an asshole in this movie.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    I’m yet to see BvS, but I’d be surprised if it didn’t suck.

  • OMNI

    Voyeur

  • Embodied

    Is BoB good? Most of the time I see WW2 related stuff they want to present soldiers as heroes, whatever that means, and not as the killing man whores they really were and always will be.

  • Spoiled Ants

    I like both equally. How about that?

  • Spoiled Ants

    Both series achieve different tings in my opinion. I like Band of Brothers because of it’s large cast, the strong theme of friendship and how they deal with sometimes incompetent commanding officers.
    The Pacific is a bit more whimsy, but I like that it focuses more on the de-humanizing character of war, the struggle to maintain humanity and because of the smaller cast the series can spend a little bit more time with the soldiers civilian life before and after the war.
    I find the battle scenes not so exciting as the character stuff on both series.
    But I’m really looking forward for the Napoleon project that Spielberg is going to produce, hopefully they employ the same writers from BoB.

  • Spoiled Ants

    In the same scene?
    Damn, I knew I shouldn’t have watched this movie on a chinese plane.

  • fred

    Fine. Be that way.

  • fred

    It’s a good show.

  • RockyDmoney

    Yeah it was the scene after WS is captured and the two of them are in the confernce room. Tony presents Steve with the two pens?

    that’s fine if you feel cap is an asshole. One of the things that is great about the movie, I think, is that neither side is presented as 100% right or wrong

    Iron Man makes some good points as does Cap. And they both have some bad points

  • Jerome Gorden

    It sucks more than Rich Evans…and that’s a lot of sucking. Go see it and you’ll appreciate Civil War way more.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    Man, I don’t know. I think I’m gonna wait until I get to (legally) see it for free.

  • Veteran of the Psychic Wars

    I remember the pens bit, not the other thing though.

    Yeah, I think that good arguments can be made for both sides, but I came away from the movie feeling like they’d relied too much on the perceived moral authority of Captain America rather than putting forth any actual arguments – especially because while my memory does suck, I also remember in Age of Ultron when Hulk (an Avenger) went on a destructive rampage through a city because a) he’s the Hulk and b) the Scarlet Witch messed with his mind. The Witch, who is now an Avenger, and who according to Cap and herself (despite her feels after the incident in this movie) shouldn’t have to actually be held accountable for anything.

    Well, I kind of got distracted there. I guess my actual point is that while I agree with you that the movie doesn’t present either side as being 100% right or wrong and that that’s good, that my impression of how they handle Cap and his side relies too much on an empathy with the character and a recognition of an implicit moral superiority when it comes to that character that the movie version hasn’t earned.

    But anyway, I don’t really remember the movie well enough, so I should probably stop arguing with someone who actually remembers the damn thing.

  • Wisconsinite

    So, why couldn’t they use the same “healing” serum stuff/formula that Tony modified to not have the “blow up/burn up” effect at the end of Iron Man 3 to totally fix Rhodey? Didn’t he perfect that stuff that helped the soldiers rebuild limbs and basically be “un-killable”? Was there some reason it couldn’t help Rhodey? That’s how Iron Man fixed his heart….right?

  • ABasketOfPups

    Iron Man fixed his heart with surgeons cutting him open and taking out the shrapnel. But yes, you’d think since he was able to “cure” Pepper of the Extremis eventually-you-blow-up problem, that it’d be useful to cure things that need regeneration like spinal crushinating.

  • netcrave

    I realize that you guys put wrong stuff in your reviews on purpose, as clickbait basically, but this still was one of your worst reviews. I remember when you insisted on how cool it was that Khan beat Kirk in Star Trek with a Miranda class vessel, which is a weaker ship than the Constitution class, by having to use cunning instead – but here in this movie it’s suddenly a total letdown, that Baron Zemo is a normal dude, who managed to trick a bunch of superheroes.

    You also didn’t make the connection that the gov was obviously wrong, although you mention the reason yourself. When you said that the collateral damage in the beginning wasn’t the Avengers fault, you should have realized that this meant the gov was wrong, because the exact same thing would have happened, if the UN would have sent them there = no difference. You also realized, that the Avengers always did everything they could to save bystanders anyway. No amount of supervision could have guaranteed no losses in every mission they went to. Captain America is the only one in the movie who realized this, when he said that this change would only shift the blame.

    There is so much more that could be said about it, but…

  • Skins

    You are the kind of nerd nobody wants to play with.

    “You also didn’t make the connection that the gov was obviously wrong” …lol

  • Everything’sComingUpMilhouse

    Good God, I hope the next HitB is a review of Swiss Army Man.

  • netcrave

    Yeah you are right to mention that gov thing out again, the gov positions were so extraordinarily stupid in that film that I was shocked they didn’t point it out more.

    When William Hurt made his speech in the beginning pro oversight, I couldn’t believe that no one pointed out that SHIELD had lots of oversight, by an extra council even and had been overtaken by Hydra long ago…

    It was so jarring, really. I also couldn’t believe that Wanda kept silent when he went on about Sarkovia, because it was her very own brother and last family member who died there, in defense of all the people they saved. It was extremely inappropriate to tell HER anything about sacrifice.

    The list just goes on and on…

  • Deor

    This movie was so much better than the winter soldier. I’m so sick of the regurgitated “we have to save the world!”-plot, there’s no connection to this world in peril so the audience doesn’t care. A movie like this is like a breath of fresh air, something much more personal. I was way may invested in a simple fist fight between captain america and iron man than any of the other movie’s ending with their lasers into the sky or whatever. I’m pretty sure this movie is going to stick with me a lot longer than whatever the plot or the laser of the week from the winter soldier was.

  • Deor

    Also the guys seem to completely miss the fact that Tony Stark was actually sort of the villain in this captain america movie.

  • Variant

    The super hero regulation idea isn’t quite as “pointless” as Mike says I think. Maybe you can’t avoid collateral damage altogether, but perhaps the UN or whoever could pick and choose the proper superhero whose abilities may best serve the situation while minimizing the collateral damage. Like, if there’s a monster attacking a village made of wood – do you send a guy who shoots fire there? Probably not. In the same way you probably don’t really send the Hulk into any populated areas whatsoever.

  • Better: reach above his head and pull out two hammers from holsters on his shoulders…

  • Valter Vilar

    Thank you for making that comment Derek! It is ipsis literis what I would like to have written myself.

  • Variant

    I agree, I’m just so sick of Star Wars stories about death stars. I think as far as the new trilogy goes they should have left the super death star to like the middle of the three, because that would be different from the original which had a death star in the first and third. OR… check this out… crazy idea. DON’T DO A FUCKING DEATH STAR!!!! Do something creative! Write a story about something weird! It’s fucking space! Why do the major plotlines have to be so god damn boring? I don’t care at ALL how they got the plans to the death star. What a pointless thing… that’s like a subplot you throw into a movie for filler. Like you said – all you need to know is they had the plans. Nothing more.

  • TheVerySpecialK

    Seriously, Star Wars has the perfect creative setting, and it is being so underutilized: you have a universe populated by thousands of technologically advanced races, and all the writers can come up with is some variation on a planet-destroying space-station? I’m seriously at the point with Star Wars where I just pick and choose what I consider to be canon while ignoring the rest.

  • Variant

    It’s almost like all the actual sci fi shit is filler sometimes. Like you have these wacky bars populated by all these colorful characters of potentially different backgrounds… but we don’t really learn anything about them. Hell, sometimes I feel like we don’t really learn a lot about anything. I’m sure at some point in the extended universe someone made up some interesting shit about an alien race or two, I used to play Star Wars Galaxies myself before it went to shit. But that’s just the point isn’t it – you shouldn’t have to rely on what is essentially avid fan-fiction to paint all the color into the background. I think Star Wars problem right now is that it doesn’t have a central voice… if the original movie was really just a happy accident, and Empire Strikes back was great because of the other voices involved… then there really isn’t any driving vision behind Star Wars. It feels like it’s just a name people are juggling around and shoving whatever they want into – but not doing enough with any of the wacky stuff they shove in to make it feel like a consistent universe.

  • One thing that really bugged me was Vision during the first discussion about the accord.
    He was happy to calculate the damage and loss of life of the previous movies, but not able to understand the concept that meeting an alien space invasion with military and police force without superheroes would be a worse alternative.

  • Jack Lewis

    He was the villain for no good reason… until the last few minutes of the movie which is the only point where you could understand why he’s fighting Captain America.

  • Mairsx

    I dont know why so much talk about that plot. Its just convoluted garbage excuse. It was never intended to make sense. Nobody bothered.

    Governments, UN wants to handle avengers through bureaucracy, right? Because Avengers do collateral damage and whatnot. Same goverments that fired a nuke on New York that Iron man pushed through that portal into space? Same shield directors and management that was infested with hydra?

    Why isnt the story about that? A natural continuation of the previous movie storyline and internal logic. Its never even mentioned and you have the Winter soldier right there too – so you can tie up all those loose ends.

  • Mairsx

    Very well said.

  • I want more Butch.

  • Joshua Frye

    It’s a little moronic that you guys think the battle was lopsided. They had the Scarlet Witch, who uttered the phrase “no more mutants” and removed mutant powers from existence temporarily.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    And Clark Gregg’s full frontal nude scene was really gratuitous.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That’s why I read The Atlantic.
    **slide whistle**

  • Iggy

    If they were going to make it “real world”, they’d have done something like have the UN Security Council “order” the Avengers to go to war against some nation or some nation + super agency (aliens/mutants/whatever) that was not a major threat to anything.

    Inotherwords, show the World Human Powers as wanting to control the Avengers as if they were a brainless weapon…

    …and half the Avengers being convinced to help the world powers and half being against it…

  • But they bring The Hulk into their fights. In every capacity that is what I call “precarious”. I think some supervision is needed. “Don’t send The Hulk into populated cities to fight monsters” – because you’ll have a Man of Steel situation on your hands.

  • Brett Burrett

    I feel like it would have been a good story originally but it’s like there were 5 different script revisions by 5 different writers which pulled it in 5 different directions. Obviously it would have made more sense for Captain America to be on the “Lawful Good” side and Stark to be on the “Chaotic Good” side but it’s like some idiot producer said “hey let’s shake it up and have them swap those positions”. Which is fine, except you need to establish exactly HOW and WHY that happened. These are already well established characters. And some 5 minute discussion in a boardroom with the two of them already having come to their viewpoints with absolutely no explanation why, that doesn’t cut it. Of course, I have no idea what the comic book series said, but how much was the movie true to that anyway?

Back to Top