Gremlins Commentary and New Merch!

November 29, 201692 Comments

Filed in: General Updates

  • Percy Gryce

    First. What’s wrong with my face? (((Echo, echo, echo))).

    Anyone else here? It’s awfully lonely here.

    Will the last one to leave RLM dot com please turn the lights out?

  • It took 12 years to make this promo video.

  • RLMkeepitup

    Clickbait levels peaking, owmy groin!!

  • Admiral Bone-to-Pick

    Fourth comment! My record.

  • Herbert West

    Where’s the Wizard?

  • MichaelPalin

    I was skeptical at first when I saw the title, but it is pretty embarrassing, indeed.

  • Crixxxx

    That cartoon drawing looks more like Al Hirschfeld than Disney.

  • sdfalk

    I’ll take 2 please

  • DanceOfBirther

    “Oxygenate your womb space.” You’re welcome, hack frauds, your ever so welcome.

  • LincolnHawksBaseballCap

    Mike and Jay, why are you not putting illuminati signs in your vids? Go on one of you make the pyramid sign in the next vid, just to fuck with everybody!

  • LincolnHawksBaseballCap

    How’s your Cat?

  • Gillman

    From the Gremlins commentary:

    Jay: “It’s too cartoony.”
    Mike: “And this is coming from the guy who loves Gremlins 2.”

    It was at this moment that Mike learned that Jay is inconsistent with his observations of movies and at times can be pretentious.

  • LameSame


    Great commentary, by the way.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    I’ll say it: What is it with Susans?

  • Hank_Henshaw

    And yet, there is an Al Hirschfeld connection to Disney. See Aladdin’s genie or the Rhapsody in Blue segment from Fantasia 2000.


    I just watched Gremlins last night and I love you guys. In real life I’m not that mad, I’m usually fairly happy. Not SUPER happy, but happy. Content, even.


    The difference between this site and aintitcool is that aintitcool has a fat, childish sack of shit everyone likes to make fun of.


  • Yes, listen to Rich Evans openly hoping that somebody will kill the President by July 2017. Then talk about the movie, I think.

  • Summer of Nass

    I know what I’m getting 4 Christmas! A Space Cop blu-ray! Ow my brain hurts when I said that.

  • Summer of Nass

    See you at Myspace/Vine *slide whistle*.

  • Ellie Freckles

    I wish I could pay to have a single night of sex with Jay. 🙁

  • joedonbaker

    $36 minimum for a fucking t-shirt?

  • LameSame

    Hercules is also a very Hirschfeldy movie. Not quite as intentionally, though.

  • LameSame

    You probably can.

  • Malevolence

    Love the artwork of the crew

  • Malevolence

    You’re not Mike

  • Bruce Erickson

    Less than one minute into the commentary, and Rich has already ruled my universe.

  • Bubs

    Space Cop Coaster*

    Fixed it for you!

  • LameSame

    Max Landis was recently collaborating with them again. Jay and Max probably hooked up again, and now Jay’s all sad because he got used. Again. This may be why it’s taking them so long to release the new video! Emotional stakes.

  • instant relief

    Jessie’s baby is Andrew Thompson’s. thats why mike keeps banning him.

  • instant relief

    I blame the Gungans for 9/11.

  • Hack fraudery at its finest.

  • I’ll be getting bleach instead.

  • Layer Cake

    Hey guys just wanted to say thanks for making this commentary! It was a ton of fun like the others and I’m glad you’re still making them. Would love to see a gremlins 2 commentary after Rich re-watches it…You FUCKS!

  • Adam Baldwin

    This is great, but are we ever going to get Feeding Frenzy on Blu-Ray?

  • Stinkbeard

    You guys should print these in XXL. Don’t act like thats not what you wear either.

  • Now I Get It

    Lonely – really? – when your top follower has made her intentions so plain. How do I say “cad” in 19th century English?

  • Thanatos

    I’d buy a Lightning Fast shirt in 3XL. Some of them clearly wear 3XL too.

  • instant relief

    I like ISIS.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Rich Evans: Reported to Secret Service (and the Secret Susan Service).

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    The sizes are clearly listed as: Susan Slim, Meaty Mike, and Extra Evans.

  • Cream-A-Thon

    I think its an underrated Bob Dylan song, too. Oh yeah – joke recycling!

  • instant relief


  • Percy Gryce

    You just did.

    You, sir, have not lost your mojo. You see all, you know all. I am in awe.

  • DoobzMcgee

    No Pre – Rec shirt ?!?!?! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

  • playdude92 .

    I love Mike´s comedic acting. Hilarity in Misery.

    Also; “Impress your friends!”? More like “Confuse you friends.”

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Are we going to forget the failure of last year and have a RLM Streamathon this time?

  • Now I Get It

    Thanks, but I’m no wit such as yourself, nor poet like Bisone, just a lightweight player of words.*

    But, really now, what’s with the trollops? I’ve deleted two or three from my profile in the last two months, and you’ve got a second one chewing your ankle just since yesterday. Unless this is Domo returned from the land of the living, I’ll admit I’m getting concerned.
    * CF. also “bounder” I guess.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    The goonguz?

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Hopefully, nowhere near a camera.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Jay is like every blonde out there: While he babbles on and on about stuff and things, we are really just thinking about his sex hole.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Mike’s vicodin and booze addictions don’t pay for themselves!

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    “Is is?” a question for the ages…

  • Hack Snyder

    What happened to this place? Less than a year ago it was very active.

  • Percy Gryce

    The Great Bannening. No gifs, no pics, no links. Youtube.

  • Aquaman317

    I’m a broke actor living in LA but if I had money, I’d buy all your things!

  • Cream-A-Thon

    What about the money from your upcoming eponymous movie? Spent it all on blow…fish?

  • Hack Snyder

    Shit, that sucks. Did anyone from RLM clarify why they’ve tightened up the rules on here?

  • CapedBaldy

    Gremlin Commentary is definitely their best. Such a great film and you can tell the guys love it.

  • Aquaman317

    They’re paying me in merkins. I think it’s standard practice

  • Fizzgig

    Domo would never use a human face as a profile; only furry brown profiles with big red mouths and shiny white teeth! Greetings!

    Percy or some RLM commenter probably got the attention of Disqus’ “Daily Top Commenter” which causes the bots to pounce and latch onto all nearby followers of said commenter. They’re easy enough to uninvite from your follower profile, so they’re pretty harmless.

    Hope your book is doing well!

  • Now I Get It

    “Book is book.”
    – Subhas or Khonani
    (I forget which, but thanks for hoping.)

    I agree. Those spam ads for making money at home must have come from those same trollops, as surely as Percy’s surgical history makes him patient zero for this whole sexy epidemic.

    And “Gleetings!” to you, as Percy’s tormented junk would say, you longtime lurker with inside information, you.

  • BCFC25

    Fucking Sellouts!!

    Cant you hack frauds comeup with better money making ideas like pimpin Jay’s ass to the hipster crowd, Selling Mikes blood to the local distillery and donating Rich Evans to feed Africa’s starving masses!!

  • Fizzgig

    I will probably lurk still; the comments just aren’t the same. The funny banter has been replaced with the same noise as every other pop culture website.

    If I want to argue needlessly about how The Witch is a cinematic masterpiece because it made the Devil into a liberator and feminist, there’s so many other websites to do that with at this point. I do miss you gents, though.

  • Now I Get It

    You miss the gents, the gents miss you, the gents miss the gents. The comments have changed, for everyone.

    Just before she folded her tent, Domo II gave us a timeless line about what a mod should and shouldn’t do. I think of it whenever I see AVoCADos’ regulars spatting among themselves in their Leggo-My-Echo chambre. (Yes, I lurk a bit, too.)

    I like to think that this friction is inevitable, as locals get to know each other, find their strengths, and come out from behind their personae. Except that this discontent also seems to be a common condition webwide just now.

    For what it’s worth, Gab-dot-ai has just come on, like a non-kill cat rescue, to shelter facebook and twitter users from shadow banners and other heroes. We’ll see what communities emerge.

  • Joe Syxpac

    I get the first two, but how do you make money by donating Rich?

  • Fizzgig

    I always felt that debate should be a chance to enlighten each other, rather than prove you’re the enlightened one. That’s incredibly hard to do in an internet setting, but the nice thing about the disqus comments in RLM was that ego or pride was often times replaced with either humor or just rlm memes to prevent too much tension or discord. And most RLM commenting regulars who were kinda jerks at least tried using reason when debating someone else.

    AVoCado doesn’t really have that. I’ve seen people be incredibly rude in response to your comments there when you’re not being rude in kind. People there don’t really want to debate on things they deem “settled.” As if thought is boiled down to a science. It seems to be creeping over into real life, and is somewhat depressing.

    The side thread incident was all about ego and power trips, which I just had enough of. Hopefully interesting communities pop up from time to time. I think Bisone frequents Reason (Can’t prove that), but that’s a witty, snarky section with wildly different opinions, so I lurk there the most. Quite interesting discussions there.

  • BCFC25

    Tax write off for donating to a worthy cause!

  • Now I Get It

    That’s [enlightening each other] incredibly hard to do in an internet setting… People don’t really want to debate things they deem “settled.” As if thought is boiled down to a science. It seems to be creeping over into real life, and is somewhat depressing.

    I agree. Online, the virtue of patience is virtually absolute. [HitB #112/#comment-2910968156], Amazing World of Tapeworms]

    I can stay patient lurking on AVoCADo, as I know where their impatience comes from. My book’s second chapter is a short history of Progressivism, which is largely the history of how the Social Sciences took over the Humanities, the main result of which has been people’s general inabiility to take things they dislike or disagree with in stride. Which has resulted, in turn, in an inability to digress in the manner that I described to Taco as being essential to the Arts (HitB: Blair Witch/#comment-3040407182).

    And as I’ve posted before, whether RLM knows it or not, they’ve been fighting a rearguard action against that very takeover, by exposing the artlessness of trying to make movies “by the numbers,” as if box office totals and focus group surveys are at all scientific.

    Indeed, I’d describe this year’s election of Trump as a rejection of the “network notes” given by the “studio heads” in government, on how to live according to the story they think we should tell about America.

    The kicker is that, had Clinton won, the first thing AVoCADoans would have done is sworn a loyalty oath to Hillary, then surveilled each other for signs of disloyalty. What’s clear now – speaking of ego and power trips – is that they have no idea just how big a bullet they dodged when she lost.

    This is actually the essence of the argument that Tape and I still haven’t finished, from the end of 2015, over whether psychology is a science – he says Yes, I say No – as that argument is both simple and vast, subsuming everything that human beings are and do.

  • Fizzgig

    Ahh. Tape has a degree in psychology, I think? Which is probably why he feels so strongly about that field being a science. I think you’re in the right, though; you can’t take a large group of people and generate predictable results in a controlled setting. Adding in factors like culture and free will create arbitrary results that can’t be quantified. It’s why the Trump election is so captivating.

    Have you heard of the Procaccino vs. Fields NYC Mayoral race of 1969? It’s fascinating. Similar candidates to the current US election, similar cultural strife, and similar resentment by working class whites of being ignored or told by the political elite that their problems aren’t as significant as others. It generated a different outcome than 2016, but just barely, and created major changes to NYC’s political landscape over the next 30 years.

    Sigh, those AVoCADos. Feeling their message is the right message, but they’re just not delivering it properly. And if you don’t agree with the message, you’re obviously stupid or a bigot. It doesn’t necessarily create a great environment to absorb their message, nor to hear why others disagree or don’t place a high importance on said message. Maybe that’s why the election took everyone by surprise. I don’t have to listen to their message at all anymore. I can go elsewhere to hear something else. Some groups like RLM would never be heard before because their message isn’t the “right” one (Especially when dealing with social issues in film.) It really creates an environment of free thought and decision-making outside of a community setting, which terrifies the elite. In that respect, I’m glad Clinton lost. Although people are terrified of Trump, Clinton had enough experience to manipulate so many strings, and give the Executive Branch some serious teeth that it was never supposed to have if she won.

    I can’t really talk about the Clintons too much, though. My father flew for them while Bubba was Governor and President, and my personal issues with that family go deep, expanding over multiple decades. It’ll be enthralling to look at articles of Trump twitter rants and see communities argue over it. At least the media can’t puppeteer like they used to. It’s an unexpected evolutionary change of social media, and potentially a welcome one.

  • Now I Get It

    If you haven’t heard, another contender in the free speech market is minds-dot-com, which is in beta, apparently. Some YouTube channels are migrating there, in reaction to being targetted over their “fake news” stories.

  • Fizzgig

    I don’t click on web links through Disqus unless the account has a female name with a sexy profile picture. Sorry.

    I can deal with a name like “Now I Get It”, but a profile pic of a hockey mask is a step too far.

    I could see minds dot com doing okay. I just don’t see people switching from youtube to that. It would need to be something more unique or offer more services. I really don’t think viewers care about fair use abuses or content violations.

  • Now I Get It

    I know that LHBC was really asking about your catheter (in highly Occult pizza code), but how are your Tonks, anyway? Still hunting the Castle grounds? Foreca reports mild temps this week in your locale, and it’s been two years seven weeks since the big move. No doubt they’ve found where all the best mice and song birds nest.

  • Now I Get It

    You don’t? Just wait till you wake up to find yourself selling magazine subscriptions in a parking lot outside Safeway. Pacing and leading, Frizzywiggs, pacing and leading.

    The migration talk does seem like a lot of gamesmanship. I think it will shake out after Jan. 20, when certain federal investigations either do or do not complete.

  • Now I Get It

    I don’t have Tape’s degree, but I know some of psychology’s history and philosophy. Fortunately, there’s a simple analogy to movies that distils all that.

    Calling psychology a science is like mistaking a movie’s film for its story. Both can be broken into parts – film into frames, story into scenes – but whereas film’s frames and how we perceive them can be measured in numbers (frame rate), a story’s scenes can’t be. Which makes the former the legitimate concern of science, the latter of art.

    The notion that psychology is a science has led to testing, classing, and ranking an individual’s character and conduct, as if no one may become a human being on his own, the ne plus ultra of which is the opinion poll.*

    So, along comes Trump, whose campaigns revealed exactly this division (among so many others). The people who claimed they could read the “frame,” i.e., each individual poll, called the nomination and election for Trump’s opponents months in advance; whereas the people who claimed they could read the story, e.g., Trump’s myths and the nation’s mood, called it for Trump.

    Little picture vs. Big picture, “science” vs. art.

    And it continues today, except with the polls over, the frame readers have resorted to storytelling. Just yesterday, I heard Keith Olbermann tell how Trump’s administration is already worse than Teapot Dome and Tammany Hall.

    I think Procaccino vs. Fields – no, I hadn’t heard – is an interesting comparson. To that study, I’d add Truman Capote and Dominick Dunne, who also supposedly betrayed their jet-set peers. (Maybe even Andy Warhol, somehow.)
    * How socialised are AVoCADoans? I’ve seen them speak in loving detail about both art and the history of candidates and poll results at the county level.

  • Fizzgig

    I like that interpretation. I’ll look into Capote and Dunne. I’m off to fill out Christmas and Hanukkah cards and mail them off. Stay warm, and hope to come across more of your interesting conversations soon!

  • Percy Gryce

    Frankly, so, so busy at work (I’m in the office as I type this). And drowning in books at home (buying, selling, donating, collecting).

  • Now I Get It

    Well, thank you. It’s one cornerstone that might anchor a vast subject, so, interesting or not, there’ll be more. In fact, I owe Bisone seven essays on related items, and like Dave facing HAL at the pod bay doors, there’s absolutely nothing that he or I can do about that.

    I don’t know where best to begin with Capote, but for Dunne I got a lot out of the documentary Dominick Dunne: After the Party (2-disc edition). And to the Capote-Dunne-Warhol triumverate of weird little impresarios who changed everything, I’ll add a fourth, the “mayor” of the sunset strip himself, Rodney Bingenheimer.

    Enjoy the season, with or without your family. I was honoured that you chose me to unlurk yourself to.

  • Now I Get It

    Given the givens, I’ll say you were kind to reply. I wish I were still collecting. Since I quit my job, my finances have been flat, as in fritter.

  • Percy Gryce

    Hmm. Your job. I don’t think you’ve ever revealed even that you were employed. I imagined: professor of drama, dead-tree theater critic, or civil servant by day/public intellectual by night.

  • Now I Get It

    Wow! Cum-stained hack, ink-stained hack, or guy who doesn’t see that his great new discovery is really the chemical formula for water. But as Albert Jay Nock once said of Frank Chodorov… Ahem, that’s my bad for being dodgy and talking nonsense. Except that nonsense was half true

    BotW: Battle of the genres (etc.)/#comment-1517832949 & 1519044907
    BotW: Bloody Birthday (etc.)/#comment-1054013093

    because I wasn’t shuffling papers, as you suspected, I was shovelling shit. …Oh, wait, it was totally true.

  • Duckler

    This is the 73rd most embarrassing thing ever posted online.

  • Duckler

    Hey morons, no one but me wants another stupid copy of Space Cop!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Why would you want a picture of a cartoonified Jack on your wall?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Especially Jack.
    **throws darts at his face**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    If the polls are low enough, the President might commit seppuku out of shame.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Max Landis? Ewwww!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    (Channeling Al Pacino): And he’s got a GREAT ASS!!!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    That’s what Paul Ryan says to all the new mothers. Then he hands them a coat hanger and giggles a lot.

  • Aquaman317

    I love me some Fugu

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  • Aquaman317

    No, I bought cocaine with it

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