Best of the Worst: Wheel of the Worst #16

December 4, 2017205 Comments

Games of chance is the theme today! SPIN THAT WHEEL!! Your inbred flyover best friends from the Midwest (that you’ll never meet or be friends with) spin a wooden wheel with obscure and terrible videos on it. Watch them watch the tapes! Get drunk! And embarrass themselves! Mike gets to spin twice to redeem himself. Enjoy!

Filed in: Best of the Worst

  • Allan Jensen

    OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAWD!!!

  • WrongWithYourFace

    First!

  • Austrn Jemkins

    I was waiting all year for this

  • Worst comment ever!

  • Cream-A-Thon

    I bless the rains in Milwaukee.

  • Angela

    “(that you’ll never meet or be friends with)”

    Crushing hearts at Christmastime. I expect nothing less from you guys.

  • Percy Gryce

    Cross-posted from Yousetubes: Well, the Percy Gryce era of WOTW is definitely over: again, not a single vid on the wheel. But you do see my legacy in the opening credits–the Osteoporosis Dance and Shoji Tabuchi. It is enough.

  • Oh, good. I think I needed one of these.

  • MichaelKz

    What splendid smoking jacket on Josh there.

  • Avery

    “Tub Sluts: Spotting the Best”

  • Mr_Show

    Yay!

  • Mr_Show

    Yay!

  • Captain Matticus, LP Inc.

    Rich kind of reminds me of that time when Homer had to take driver’s ed due to his drunk driving. While everybody else was turning away from the TV screen and getting sick due to the filmed carnage, Homer was laughing hysterically.

  • I guess I’m not all that surprised that police officers are conditioned to believe that everyone is out to stab them. Pretty effective video there.

  • Bart Crowe

    It’s funny because I don’t know them!

  • Joe Syxpac

    Stabbing a cop is a rite of passage in many parts of the world.

  • Donaldo Knottso

    Now they’re gonna shoot a new intro just because you said that shit. I mean you do know that right?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Inbred flyover best friends? Did they shoot this in Alabama?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    By “stabbing” you mean “bribing with a doughnut”? Or just a regular bribe, like with cash or hard drugs? It’s how Plinkett remains a free man. True story.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    His t-shirts possessed an egregious hipster deficit this episode.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “I’m Art Kumbalek and I’m here to shank a bitch, ain’a.” — Surviving Edged Weapons 2: Kumbalek Boogaloo

  • ToliverWrist

    Shout-out to Josh, his awesome T-shirt, and the good people of Newbridge. We get it. They don’t.

  • Chowderbatter

    I’m a Milwaukee cop
    And I’m here to say
    Don’t get stabbed in the dick.
    You won’t like it, okay?

    Ungh.

    Take it, George Washington.

  • Chowderbatter

    My man, there’s a lot more states between the coasts than just Alabama.

  • Death Ray

    Don’t call me Founding Father, Call me Father Time!
    Cuz I don’t waste a tic busting’ out a dope rhyme!
    Brrrrrrr…Stick ’em! Ha ha ha stick em’!
    Milwaukee’s best hos got knives and they flick ’em!
    Samurai’s commin’ at you, karate kick ’em!
    Or they’ll be stickin’ YOU behind a desk with half a dick-um!

  • Milkmilk

    I’m a Milwaukee cop
    And I’m here to admit it
    I shot Sylville K. Smith
    And ended up acquitted

  • Milkmilk

    I’m a Milwaukee cop
    And I’m here to admit it
    I shot Sylville K. Smith
    And ended up acquitted

  • Stolen Goods

    No Neil Breen in the Hall of Fame?

    Well, one day…

  • andychrist

    im a big fan of corporate/educational/public/ safety and instuctional videos …. the british do them best , especially in the 70s and 90s …. olympics on train tracks , attacked by farm machinery , time traveling building site disasters , the hidden dangers of loose rugs …. theyve got em all.

  • andychrist

    im a big fan of corporate/educational/public/ safety and instuctional videos …. the british do them best , especially in the 70s and 80s …. olympics on train tracks , attacked by farm machinery , time traveling building site disasters , the hidden dangers of loose rugs …. theyve got em all.

  • WrongWithYourFace

    Best comment ever!

  • Jon Borg

    that fucking into LOL

  • Down Under Aussie (in Aus)

    Did you watch The Meyerowitz Stories, Jay?

  • durhay

    ” 45 seconds of no” – CinemaSins

  • durhay

    ” 45 seconds of no” – CinemaSins

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Is that a review of Jared Leto’s band?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    So I sez to Mabel I sez, I was over at the Uptowner Tavern/Charm School, and who should I see, but none udder den Art Kumbalek. He’s comin’ at the cops wit dis here katana sward and den goes stab a guy in the face. Luckily we had bleacher seats over at County Stadium, doncha know. So we go over to the Brew Crew came right after a nice Friday Night Fish Fry at Serb Hall over dere eh. Cardinal Spellman was in town and we had a nice talk about de game and the kids with their rap music and wild hairstyles. To make a long story short … wait, what wuz I sayin’?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or the hack fraud who made Geteven?

    **does the Shimmy Slide … awkwardly**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or the hack fraud who made Geteven?

    **does the Shimmy Slide … awkwardly**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    But Alabama has a proud heritage of familial inbreeding.

  • durhay

    Jimmy’s hands are edged weapons

  • Brian Levine

    Can I pay Rich to come and laugh at my funeral?

  • Brian Levine

    No, that would be 45 minutes.

  • Moist

    What is the green stuff that the large unwashed man is drinking?

    No, the other large unwashed man. The large unwashed man that is drinking the green stuff.

  • Moist

    And is that a bespoke “Nukie” throw pillow?

  • Moist

    Better, use it as a ring tone and have a friend call you as they lower your casket into the ground.

  • Danger Dave

    “MIke Tries Ecto Cooler” was a funnier premise for a show than expected.

  • Dan

    Holy shit, this was great, Surviving Edge Weapons just made everything worth it

  • Dan

    Holy shit, this was great, Surviving Edge Weapons just made everything worth it

  • RLMkeepitup

    is it time to watch Nukie yet

  • RLMkeepitup

    oh yeah stuff some coal in my present hole -them fans!

  • RLMkeepitup

    so many hoodie sweaters.. some kinda wisconsin jedi robe mumbo jumbo!

  • EJ

    Pretty sure the table manners rap came about because they had leftover props and costumes from the video for Rock Me Amadeus.

  • EJ

    *at a college house party*
    *knock knock* – “Police!”
    – “oh shit man, who’s sober enough to go and stab the cops??”

  • Ret Marut

    Seriously, Surviving Edged Weapons is superior to Bear Attacks? REALLY? Just asking.

  • Ret Marut

    Seriously, Surviving Edged Weapons is superior to Bear Attacks? REALLY? Just asking.

  • EJ

    The sheer glee on all of your faces when you first realize that Edged Weapons was made in Milwaukee is fantastic.

  • Joe Syxpac

    Is it better than Exploding Varmints?

  • Joe Syxpac

    You and Eli Manning are both being put to pasture.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    And who can forget Dustin Diamond, another fan of using Edged Weapons in drunken bar melees?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or Geteven? Do the Shimmy, Shimmy Slide!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or do the Kingsman 2 review?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Mike enjoys a nice warm glass of Malort before bedtime.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Does that mean Josh’s T-shirts are communicating messages in hipster semiotics?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Or put out to stud.

  • EJ

    Malort is sorta brownish piss-colored.

  • EJ

    You know, you don’t HAVE to respond to every comment.

  • Moist

    I got that Falco vibe a well. But I was thinking that if the rap had been presented in its entirety I might actually learn how to set a table. But I’m not a woman and I don’t do bitch work so there’s no need.

  • FiachSidhe

    Damn, Mike is just a shade tornado! Take that gamers! Eat a dick JOCKS!

  • Moist

    Hey, this has nothing to do with anything, but are those cruises just venues for old folks to get in some NSA sex?

  • Moist

    I’m a photographer and I specialize in taking pictures of people’s pets. After I dress them in costumes. That I sew myself.

  • EJ

    I’m not sure what the relevance is – I mean I’ve eaten in some pretty posh situations and I’ve never seen that much cutlery on the table. I guess if you think you might get invited to dine with the Queen of England you need to learn this stuff?

  • Cream-A-Thon

    *NASA sex

  • Moist

    Just because you have no idea where to find the G-spot doesn’t make it zero G sex.

  • Moist

    I don’t get it either. Apparently some people are too good to dine at Wienerschnitzel.

  • Marty Poo

    Pop Culture Reference don’t get this pop culture reference?

  • Lord Culvert

    SOS should be Hall of Fame also

  • stryker1121

    What in fuck’s name was with that cop video and the Tom Savini gore?

  • Moist

    “Imagine your cat. Now imagine your cat in a sequin gown styled like those worn by Gilded Age flappers!”

  • Lt Hurwitz

    I’m a fleeing felon with a gun
    I’ll point it at a cop that’ll be fun

  • RLMkeepitup

    for cops eyes only. hence why they shoot first, ask questions laters

  • Chowderbatter

    Speaking of edged weapons…

    Time to rewatch all episodes of the Channel 101 classic “Cautionary Tales of Swords,” says I.

  • Alex Doucet

    Leave rich alone ! No one cares about his shirt.

  • The police department clearly has money to spare on production value. This is where our tax dollars go.

  • Haha they were so excited. It’s kind of like when I notice a movie is filmed in northwest Oregon, though – there’s something about it. Every stoplight looks like one I’ve stopped at – every intersection looks familiar. “Night Moves” for instance was filmed very close to here. I think it made me like the movie more.

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Forcing the personality vacuum stuffed with fat and daddy issues that is Josh, is akin to the fine work WB does with their DC “franchise”. Just keep throwing that slop into the faces of the audience and the pigs will eat it. Might as well have Max Landis and Josh do an episode solo.

    *where in the feck is my stream-a-thon you frauds?

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Ugh, is this another episode where slob Josh picks on Rich as if he is better?

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    Josh making jokes about people on the internet making “real friends” when his entire bland personality comes from the t-shirts he wears to try and impress us. Right on, future suicide, right on!

  • The Wicker Man (BWF)

    “It’s little girls having a slumber party”-Rich *Mike and Jay already have their hoodies on… 😀

  • Galactic Shawn

    I pee-laughed watching this

  • Lexi Express

    Bagodonuts had me howling

  • I would agree except the video is made by a pedo cult.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I concur! We want Rich shirtless!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    But seriously Mike, cut him some slack, will you…

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Nothing is better than Exploding Varmints. NOTHING, I SAY!

  • mister man

    I actually just woke up from having a dream in which I described a dream to someone else

  • EJ

    Also that’s nowhere near the most embarrassing rap, even from what they’ve had on this show. They must have blocked out Be Cool About Fire Safety and the donut video.

  • EJ

    Oh for sure, like how most people mainly know Lost Boys because of Greasy Sax Man, but everybody who’s lived in Santa Cruz, CA loves the movie because it was filmed there and features a lot of local landmarks.

  • EJ

    I know it’s not a real safety video but “Forklift Operator Klaus” is one of the funniest things ever filmed.

    Also if you don’t know it, don’t sleep on the Serafinowicz/Popper “Look Around You” series – it’s a dead-on parody of early 80s British instructional films.

  • EJ

    Except then it’s cut with autopsy photos of the real incident that’s being re-enacted. I see what they mean about it being emotionally exhausting. Like one minute you’re laughing at a guy getting a cleaver through the brainpan and then you see the corpse of the real guy that happened to.

  • EJ

    They’ve only ever reviewed Double Down, right? Breen’s made 3 more films since then…

  • Totally. My parents both come from Santa Cruz so they were always quick to point out the Boardwalk and say “we’ve been there!”

  • It’s stylistically designed to be that way.

  • They never even got to the bear attack part of Bear Attacks – from what I remember it was so boring it was putting them to sleep. Kinda like the tree stand safety video. Amazing cover – dry, boring video.

  • EJ

    What if the slot machine video is secretly anti-gambling? I mean the amount of times he keeps repeating that it’s all just random and there’s no way to game the system, combined with him losing all the time, doesn’t make playing the slots all that compelling.

  • I mean – when was this produced, the early 90s? Possibly the very late 80s? I’m pretty sure embarrassing rap at the time was mostly limited to like Vanilla Ice and some of the folk over in Britain who at the time had not figured out how to flow in their accent yet. The instrumental screams “80s” but that can also mean the early 90s. If you ask me Be Cool About Fire Safety was a tier higher – but it also came later I think (mid-90s?) so I think that the universal standard had raise ever so slightly.

  • Who is he making the video for though? That’s what I want to know.

  • EJ

    I think what makes table manners rap more watchable is that the dude really isn’t trying very hard to be cool. He clearly knows what he’s involved with and is giving it all the seriousness it deserves.

  • True, he gets props for confidence alone.

  • Joe Syxpac

    So was Rosemary’s Baby, but it’s still in the NFR.

  • Brian Levine

    But it’s not random. Those computer chips are coded to ensure that people win just enough to keep them hooked. Vegas knows the odds of every game and loves to control everything. They know that if you lose say, 80% of the time, you’re not coming back.

  • EJ

    WRT the blades on the hat, I think hiding razors under a hat brim was a classic old school Chicago gangster thing.

  • Oh yeah… didn’t they make a show in that setting? “Peaky Blinders” I think it was called? I never watched it but I recall the blades on the hat thing. I think Tom Hardy was in it?

  • Wasn’t aware of this – I’ll have to look it up sometime. Haven’t seen that flick since I was a young’n

  • EJ

    Yeah. I mean I can see how cops could get to feel that way considering that most of the time when cops do get murdered on duty, it really is in some banal situation like a routine traffic stop. I guess there’s sometimes a pretty fine line between situational awareness and full-blown paranoia.

  • EJ

    You know Polanski raped a 13 year old, right?

  • Oh totally. Yeah I don’t mean to completely berate police officers as a singular entity – I’m sure it can be a pretty scary job – not all cops are assholes, but often even the ones that aren’t get fired for not being big enough assholes. (disapproval of orders to use more violence resulting in being punished is apparently a thing that happens). I’m sure it depends on where you’re at. But that being said – I usually would not trust them with my life.

  • Had no idea. Don’t even know who Polanski is admittedly but that’s awful. Guessing he was the director/visionary behind that film?

    Fuck you, Hollywood!

  • EJ

    Really? Yeah, google Roman Polanski. He also made Chinatown, The Pianist, bunch of other brilliant films. But he’s a pedophile rapist and the US has been trying to extradite him from various European countries since the late 70s.

  • EJ

    Peaky Blinders is in Birmingham, England around the same time but now that you mention it they did the razors in the hat brim thing on that show as well. In fact that’s the source of the gang’s name.

    It’s pretty good, you should check it out if you like gangster movies. Just be aware that the accents are 1920s working class English so it’s gonna take some effort to understand some of the dialogue.

  • Sweet – I think I’ll actually check that out sometime. Need something decent to binge.

  • I mean – if I had to guess – keep in mind I don’t know anything about programming or engineering – they probably use some form of random number generator, which in software form has been described to me as a “giant number wheel” – kind of like the wheel that spins when you crank the lever – only difference is that the probability is working off an unseen factor. Otherwise you’d go “oh I know when there’s a cherry, a grape, and a.. whatever to start with – that it will spin x number of times and land on y.” But it doesn’t. So the number of times it rotates is altered each time from the getgo. I think sometimes they’re tied to system clocks , other times it’s other things – but it would seem more logical to me to just place a hard limit on how many times a machine can go off as a big winner in one day, but keep the probability factor. I’m assuming at some point someone checks these machines out to make sure they are legit – but I could be wrong. Casinos are probably greasy. Again – I don’t really know anything.

  • ikdks

    Research has shown that for gamblers, a near miss gives you the same shot of dopamine as a win. So they can provide you the addictive substance without even paying out.

  • ikdks

    My mom says i would have friends if i weren’t so handsome.

    So there, Wizard, if that is your name.

  • ikdks

    It’s got to be SOS, if we’re retconning this thing.

  • ikdks

    …or Xtro.

  • EJ

    Yeah you give the gambler all but one of the things he needs (slot machine reels, scratch off numbers, whatever) and he thinks “I was so close! Next time!”

  • ikdks

    Yeah, but i always thought that was an intellectual thing, but it actually tricks your brain chemistry.

  • andychrist

    they are all on the bfi website . also includes such classiscs as protect and survive , apaches and all the charley says films.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Holy s#&t, someone else knows Forklift Operator Klaus! We saw it at a movie festival years ago and I swear to God I don’t remember any of the contending movies… Just Klaus! Good call EJ!

  • Big Trouble

    The Pac Man shirt is cool. <3

  • Pop Culture Reference

    OK, Oedipus, yes. You are handsome. Now off to school with you.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    What about hiding razor blades in Halloween candy like any ordinary American does?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    He might be a coked-out lunatic who looks like the nightmare child of Bob Ross and Stan Lee, but, to tell you the truth, I’d totally vote for him.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    His pet cat.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Extradite him for what, a presidential pardon?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    You mean the G-spot on a saxophone?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Hey, I can’t fill up my empty meaningless existence with hipster t-shirts like some people.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I know, right.

    **continues to eat supper out of a garbage bag while he watches Grown Ups 2 on Blu-ray**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Have you ever seen Prince Charles eat? The servants have to tape the spoon and fork to his hands so he can use them properly.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    … out of human skin?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I thought it was absinthe?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Pumpkin Spice Malort?

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I agree. Q-codes are here to stay!

    **jams floppy disk into the 8-track player in his coal-powered El Camino**

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Klaus Kinski drives a forklift? I’m so there!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    … or ROTOR.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I’ll bring the lube!

  • Pop Culture Reference

    I imagine Mr. Plinkett had thought of numerous scenarios involving hacking Jar Jar Binks’s brain with a meat cleaver.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    Yeah, that’s what the Bilderbergs want you to think. Watch the skies! Black helicopters and Roswell UFOs might kidnap me and use probes. Luckily I have a pocket knife in my overalls.

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “He was holding a sandwich! I’ll be doin’ paperwork for a week over this.”

  • Pop Culture Reference

    “He was holding a sandwich! I’ll be doin’ paperwork for a week over this.”

  • Thanatos

    Don’t fucking touch swords!

  • Thanatos

    Fun fact: Vegas Gambling laws have recently been loosened to allow casinos to introduce slot machines where skill of the user effects payout rates. Turns out millennials raised on video games don’t find brainless lever pulling masquerading as a fake game all that compelling and slot popularity has plummeted in recent years.

    So all crazy Jimmy’s info will be truly outdated soon enough.

  • EJ

    Intellectual… brain chemistry… tomato, tomatah

  • EJ

    My neighbor drives a forklift and he said they showed it at the end of a real safety training seminar for a laugh.

  • Moist

    Maybe, but it looks terrible on him.

    I’ve seen an alarming amount of support for the shirt in these comments and I think the schism between the pro-shirts and the anti-shirts has the potential to really tear the fabric of this great community apart. I think the only way for us all to avoid catastrophe is to break up into a bunch of bickering tribal affiliations and start insulting anyone and everyone who doesn’t adhere to one’s faction’s particular sense of moral virtue.

    Allow me to begin: You pro-shirt dumbasses all have breath that smells like dog shit, presumably because dog shit is what you eat. Also: you’re all crybaby Nazi racists.

  • EJ

    Love to know what you guys thought of The Disaster Artist. Is that next on HitB?

  • EJ

    Your mom eats dog shit.

  • Moist

    Yeah, I know. She’s pro-shirt.

  • EJ

    Re-watching this I realized that nobody in the drug gang shootout scene even has an edged weapon – they all have guns. The director obviously really wanted to make an action movie and figured a cop training film was as close as he was going to get.

  • RLMkeepitup

    youtubes the home of DIY and How To’s videos now. I’d guess most gambling is online too

  • RLMkeepitup

    eat your heart out Lethal Weapon

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    We saw it in German, which added a special touch…

  • When that first trailer dropped where they’re showing their preparation for the rooftop scene it seemed to me like it “missed the point” and I wrote it off as a cynical cashgrab that will confuse the actual history of The Room. However upon viewing the subsequent trailers I actually think Franco’s Tommy Wiseau is not half bad and the movie looks a little closer to what I would like to see. I’m also interested in hearing what they have to say about it.

  • EJ

    Have you seen it? It’s pretty well-done. Dave Franco is actually really good as Greg Sestero.

  • EJ

    No I don’t trust cops all that much either. It’s a conundrum because I wouldn’t necessarily want to live in a society where there are no police. I do think that it’s a minority of cops who really are just genuine assholes, but both the reality of the job and the way they’re trained contribute to ordinary cops being the way they are.

  • EJ

    Fire Safety has a “Wassup, fellow teens!” sense of desperation about it. Table manners dude is clearly just like, uh, ok so I dress up like an 18th century footman and rap about silverware, got it. When do I get paid?

  • EJ

    Is there an English version? I’ve only ever seen the original German, with subtitles.

  • EJ

    I used to walk across that railroad bridge every day. (in reality it has a footpath bolted to the side of it – also it’s just about 30-40 feet above a river, not a swirling portal to hell).

  • EJ

    I’ve never understood why anybody plays any games other than craps. Slots are literally just hitting buttons, and card games everyone is so serious all the time. A hot craps table is a party.

  • ikdks

    I don’t know, man. With the first one they’re tricking you, with the second, they’re hacking you. It’s a bit more sinister if you ask me.

    It’s the difference between being grifted and being hypnotised.

  • ikdks

    I don’t know, man. With the first one they’re tricking you, with the second, they’re hacking you. It’s a bit more sinister if you ask me.

    It’s the difference between being grifted and being hypnotised.

  • Not yet! I’ll keep your recommendation in mind. And yeah – I’ll admit I haven’t even watched The Room from front to back – but like it’s gained such infamy I feel like I’ve watched each individual scene on youtube. Except the sex scene cause that’s not really funny

  • Papa Figo

    “Who better to help you through a potential computer apocalypse then mister Spock?”, says Mike. Wouldn’t Data be more up to it?

  • EJ

    Isn’t Charles 5 time champion Upper Class Twit of the Year?

  • ikdks

    Dax could do it, and she’s hot.

  • Joe Syxpac

    That depends on whether or not Data was Y2K compliant.

  • EJ

    Maybe – I feel like a good grifter subconsciously knows how to manipulate your brain chemistry.

  • Thanatos

    Craps players are crazy people who get angry at you for winning.

  • Bob

    I knew this day would come. So now I need to start ranking things.

    Best WotW videos by review from RLM:
    4. Dog Sitter (w/Rich Evans’ crank call)
    3. Exploding Varmints
    2. S.O.S.
    1. Surviving Edged Weapons

    I am open to other suggestions. This is the order of my most hearty laughs.

  • The Brosevelt

    You should track down the principal minds behind Surviving Edged Weapons. Honestly, I was feeling sympathy for police officers simply watching your commentary and the small clips of those poor cops being stabbed. That’s one damn effective tape if it can accomplish all that though a third-party retelling.

    As far a slot machines, I do not understand them. It seems that all of them are similar with that screen with matching across different levels. I do not have the patience to understand “how” to win and so I just keep pressing the damn betting button. I do not get the appeal. Now, bingo is the game of kings.

    Rich’s Pac-Man shirt screams, “I have given up on reproducing.” The shirt is a sociology expirment and Rich is being studied from afar in determine motivations for wearing such a monstrosity. I remember walking into a screening of Monty Python and the Holy Grail a few years back. I was late so I had to search for a seat in the dark. However, during the opening scene with the coconuts I began hearing that iconic coconut tapping. Throughout the movie, a chorus of men kepting squealing in delight. After the movie, the lights came on and low and behold, row after row of bearded men who look like Rich.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Not to my knowledge, but I like it just fine. I didnt know about the narrator’s IRL job, but a road safety sequel would be as awesome as Surviving Edged Weapons!

  • EJ

    You’re the a-hole that walks up to a hot table, bets Don’t Pass and wins, right?

  • EJ

    I know they joke about Rich never getting laid but I think IRL he’s married.

  • The Brosevelt

    I kid because I love. Rich is my favorite RLM hackfraud. I even like the Canadian guest critics.

  • Brian Levine

    Actually, it would be Kirk, who took down more flawed computer systems than anyone else in Star Fleet.

  • Michael

    He is fully functional

  • DasKleineTeilchen

    ohmygaaaaAAAAAWWWWHHHD!

    these hackfrauds do read the comments! and I got proof! a comment I wrote at “the Mist”-review:

    ? I beg to differ; RICH! is most likely the wizard in person. josh is just his frontprojection *as* “thewiZARDOfoZ”

    and what is josh holding in his hands in the first minutes of this episode? YES! I SAW WHAT YOU DID THERE! DO THE ZARDOZ-REVIEW YOUR HACKS!

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    I say the only fabric we should tear apart is Rich’s shirt! Let us bask in the glory of Shirtless Rich and put this pointless feud to rest.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    Ergo pro-shit.

  • Movie Wan Kenovie

    They DO read our comments? Sweet Jesus have mercy on them…

  • DasKleineTeilchen

    “so we saw the new transformers-movie…and we wanna talk about”…”thats right, colin”…..”…”…..”ah, fuck this!”

    best review ever.

  • DasKleineTeilchen

    sex scene

    I had to close my eyes; and I advice anyone to do it likewise…it cant be unseen and will haunt you for the rest of your life.

  • He at the very least has a fiance. Rich does just fine for himself.

  • I don’t think I’ve ever thought more or less of someone for the shirt they are wearing unless it was trying to make a statement that was stupid and attract a lot of attention to that.

  • John DeSpirito

    Can I humbly submit that you retroactively add “Exploding Varmints” to your newly christened BOTW Hall of Fame.

  • Brian Levine

    Who knew Mike could read?

  • Brian Levine

    Who knew Mike could read?

  • Brian Levine

    RLM reviewed War of the Worlds? Oh yeah…Jay drank poison and Mike had to pump his stomach. I loved that episode.

  • Thanatos

    See what I mean. Craps players are also the most susceptible to the Gambler’s Fallacy.

  • Nemo

    Not to be pedantic. but at 1:01:12 in the coke bust a shiv does come up. And note, this scene actually comes right after the Satanists.

    It was the ’80s. They were prob’ly just playing D&D.

    And if you fast-forwarded, you’ve never read AMEDD’s “Wound Ballistics”.

  • Nemo

    Not to be pedantic. but at 1:01:12 in the coke bust a shiv does come up. And note, this scene actually comes right after the Satanists.

    It was the ’80s. They were prob’ly just playing D&D.

    And if you fast-forwarded, you’ve never read AMEDD’s “Wound Ballistics”.

  • ikdks

    Was Mike doing the black lady from Get Out, with the no no no’s?

    It’s nearly equally unnerving.

  • EJ

    The back and forth from the Athletes for Abstinence video reminded me of my old shop teacher in high school, who once went on an impromptu, extended anti-drugs rant. His alternative plan for if we needed to, as he put it, “get our thrills?”

    Do what he did as a young man, get into cigarette boat racing. He then told us how rad it was, and then started telling us stories about guys he knew who were maimed or killed driving stupidly fast speedboats. One kid raised his hand and said, “so this is safer than drugs, how exactly?” and got kicked out of class for the day.

  • Rick Wiltgen

    Is the girl with the Betty Page haircut in the manners video someone famous? She looks so familiar. Can’t place where I know her from. At 9:00.

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